Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles (1987) s03e04 Episode Script

9059-009 - The Maltese Hamster

Teenage mutant ninja turtles teenage mutant ninja turtles teenage mutant ninja turtles heroes in a half shell turtle power they're the world's most fearsome fighting team We're really hip.
They're heroes in the half shell and they're green Hey, get a grip.
When the evil shredder attacks these turtle boys don't cut him no slack teenage mutant ninja turtles teenage mutant ninja turtles splinter taught them to be ninja teens He's a radical rat.
Leonardo leads, Donatello does machines That's a fact, Jack.
Raphael is cool but rude Gimme a break! Michelangelo is a party dude teenage mutant ninja turtles teenage mutant ninja turtles teenage mutant ninja turtles heroes in a half shell turtle power lions gate entertainment me, a lardo? No way, dudes.
Read it and weep, Michelangelo.
RAFAEL: How can he? His stomach's in the way.
Yeah, Rafael's right.
One more pizza with chocolate sprinkles and you'll have to let out your shell.
Exactly, Donatello.
It's time you practiced some self-discipline, Michelangelo.
Oh, bummer.
Michelangelo, don't leave while master splinter is giving you advice.
Believe me, this isn't my idea.
Ow! Whoa! Whoa! Whatever Michelangelo's got is catching.
Master, what's going on? I have my suspicions, but it is too soon to tell.
Finally, we have the perfect weapon.
A gravity altering device.
With it, I can control gravity and force the city to obey my every command! Ha ha ha ha! Your command? I'm the one who invented it.
Krang, you're nothing but a throbbing, pulsating brain.
Why not leave the messy details of conquering the world to me.
I'm increasing its anti-gravitational potency to go beyond the subterranean level.
No, stop! It's not perfected yet.
I can't wait any longer.
I want this city to grovel at my feet now! Shredder, you're an insane, power-mad thing! Thank you.
IRMA: April, I think I finally met Mr.
right.
That's wonderful, Irma.
This time it's the real thing, April.
Oh, he really sweeps me off my feet.
So I see.
Irma, what's happening to us? You, too? So, you have that effect on all women.
And I thought you were faithful to me.
Aah! What's going on? April, this is all your fault! When you asked that tightwad Thompson for a raise, everything hit the ceiling.
What's that, Vernon? Oh! Uh, hi there, Mr.
Thompson.
Nice of you to drop in.
I mean up.
Ow! I'll bet those outlaw turtles are behind this.
I don't think so, Mr.
Thompson.
Don't defend them! It's just the sort of trick those sewer-swimming juveniles would pull! April, do you think maybe those turtles did cause this? No way, Irma, but maybe they can save us from it.
Come in, turtles.
This is April.
I need help.
[BEEPING.]
Whoa! Something truly freakazoid's happening.
All this bouncing on the ceiling has my ears beeping.
No, that's my turtlecom.
April, this is Leonardo.
What's up? We are.
Something's gone crazy with gravity.
Tell me about it.
We're having the same problem.
What do you think is causing it? My guess is it has something to do with shredder and krang.
Krang, you're such a worry wart.
The gravity-altering device is working perfectly.
Now to increase the power.
No! No! You'll cause an overload.
Nonsense.
I know what I'm doing.
Great.
The biggest story of my career, and I can't get down to cover it.
Well, you said you wanted to make it to the top of the company.
This must be a dream.
Somebody splash some water on my face.
Oh! It's not a dream.
It's a nightmare.
Somebody pinch me, please.
Irma, are you all right? Sure.
I'm used to being dropped.
Donatello, is that you? What's going on? I wish I knew, April.
First we're floating, then we're crashing.
A mondo nutzoid experience, dudes.
Yeah.
If you can't trust mother gravity, who can you trust? Now I'm certain that shredder is behind this.
We must stop him.
You fool! I warned you the device wasn't perfected! Oh.
I haven't time for such niggling details.
What are you doing?! You're not licensed to make those adjustments.
I'm making emergency repairs.
A few simple adjustments, and I can cause some real damage.
Picking up any signals, Donatello? Gravity scope registers a total zip.
Let's pack it in, guys.
We've been searching for two hours and haven't found diddly.
It is possible that anti-gravity glitch was just a freak of nature.
Talk about freaking.
Scope out the street just ahead.
Something's radiating from beneath the street.
Leonardo, hit the brakes.
I'm trying, but something's pulling us toward it.
[ALL SHOUTING.]
Great.
More falling on our heads.
What's going on? It's some kind of hyper-gravity.
And it's not just affecting us.
Look.
Whatever it is has the whole city in its clutches.
Oh, beautiful, isn't it? The perfect way to bend a city to my will.
Fool! What good is a city that can't move? Don't you see, krang? Citizens who can't move can't fight back.
Rock steady, bebop, are you ready? Yeah.
Ready to make turtle stew out of those shell backs.
[SNORT.]
We'll mash 'em into mush.
Just remember, you're wearing antigravity boots.
As long as you keep those boots on, you can move anywhere.
Now get to work! Work? This is going to be pure pleasure.
Please unlock my feet.
I've got to go home and cook dinner for my husband! The nerve! Keeping us here until we buy your tacky dresses.
Honest, ladies, I'm not doing it.
I can't move, either.
Hey, look! A ladie'' dress shop.
Gee, I never been in one before.
Aah! Ooh! All right, quit gawking.
We ain't got time for a fashion show.
We gotta find them turtles.
Come on! You win.
I'll buy the dress.
I'll buy all of your dresses! Lady, I had nothing to do with it.
Mondo bizarro, dudes.
Well, it could be worse.
Yeah? How? Uh, that's how.
It's those freakazoids bebop and rock steady.
Looks like they have no trouble walking.
Turtle alert! We're under attack! It's turtle trashin' time! [SNORTING.]
Ok, troops, fall in for some lootin' and shootin'.
I'm gonna crack some shells How come those sleazoids can walk around, and we can't? It probably has to do with those klutzy boots they're wearing.
Oh, man, I'd sure like to get my hands on their feet.
Michelangelo, you just gave me an idea.
When rock steady gets here, keep him distracted.
Yummy! My favorite dish.
Turtles in a stew.
Hey, rhino breath! I bet you're too chicken to step inside.
Oh, yeah? Just watch.
Hey, dude, why don't you take that bony nose of yours and blow.
Oh, yeah? I'm going to walk all over your face.
Ow! It worked! Grab him! He's grabbed.
Donatello, help me get his boots.
Whew! This is hazardous work.
Hey, you wimps! Give me back my boots.
Can't somebody make him pipe down? Hey! Ooh! Quick thinking, Donatello.
Michelangelo, hold still.
This is a 3-point shot.
All right! These boots were made for walking.
Then walk out there and capture more antigravity boots for the rest of us.
Whoa! These boots are really righteous.
Too bad they don't come in green.
Ouch! Oh, no! Foot soldiers after my footgear.
And the hyper-gravity's put my chuks in slo-mo mode.
Bummer.
Their ray blasters are in fast mode.
But I got a rad idea.
Oh, I sure hope this works.
Ciao, dudes.
Ha ha ha! Score--turtles 2.
Bad guysZippo.
Hey, guys.
Watch the birdies.
No, don't you get it? The birds-- they're flying.
Everything else is stuck to the ground, but the birds are above the pull of gravity.
If we can get to the turtle blimp, we can fly, too.
Yeah, but we got to walk out of here first.
Hey, it's a done deed, dudes.
Ha ha.
Got your antigravity boots.
Four boots for six feet? No problem, guys.
I've got the solution.
Well, guys, what do you think? I think all that time upside-down affected your brain.
Hey, it's either this or someone rides you turtle-back.
With total mastery of gravity, I control what rises and what falls.
Shredder, I see that power makes you light-headed.
I tell you, krang, the world is mine! Ahem.
Ours.
So why are those stupid mutants of yours signaling for help?! Bebop, rock steady, where are the turtles? They clobbered your foot soldiers and stole their boots.
You pathetic peons! Can't I trust you to do anything right? Where are you going? To the surface to take personal charge of things.
Donatello, you were right.
The hyper-gravity force only extends about a dozen feet above the earth.
Now all we have to do is locate the source of it.
Do those insufferable turtles really think they can get the best of me? Heh heh.
A minor adjustment to these anchor boots and a major adjustment to the gravity-altering device, and we'll see how the turtles deal with ultra reverse gravity.
What is that maniac shredder doing? Leonardo, look out for that cat! Meow! What's a cat doing up here? Probably asking that same question about four turtles.
It's getting mondo crowded up here.
Look! The objects floating up are getting bigger and bigger.
No wonder.
The gravity force is now in full reverse.
Hang on! I have to use full power to keep us from drifting away.
Look! Even buildings are breaking loose.
Mega disaster, dudes! If I can't dominate this city, I'll destroy it by letting it float completely off the planet.
[LAUGHING.]
The entire city is floating away.
Cowabunga! A pizza truck.
You know, the world's really gone bizarro when pizzas bite you back.
Look out! Flying food.
Look what's headed this way now.
It's rock steady and bebop.
Hang on! We're going to collide! Yeow! Ugh! Ooh.
That smarts.
Enjoy it, pig face.
That's the only kind of smarts you'll ever have.
It's the turtles! You wimps are about to get mashed.
Hey! Come back.
Where are you guys going? You suppose it was something we said? If this reverse gravity gets any worse, the whole city will be a vacant lot.
Leonardo, help! The channel 6 building is pulling away from its foundation! We're trapped on the roof.
Help is on its way, ladies.
Hang on.
Believe me, I have every intention.
The turtles are coming as fast as they can.
Oh, great.
My life depends on the speed of a turtle.
What's that? We're lifting into the sky! Quick, Leonardo.
We've got to anchor down the building.
Prepare to launch grappling hook.
Fire! Good shot, Leonardo.
Piece of cake.
Now let's find another building to anchor to, somethingHumongous.
How's that one? They don't get much more humongous than that.
Great.
Now for the finishing touches.
Hold her steady, Leonardo.
Primo to the extremo.
You were right, April.
The turtles did save us.
You ladies ok? Ahh, we're fine thanks to you.
I could kiss you fellas if you had lips.
What's causing all this craziness? I think I've come up with a theory.
Look over there.
Those energy rays pulsating up from the ground.
You think the reverse gravity is coming from there? As Michelangelo would say, exactamundo, dude.
Exacta--so like what do we do about it? See that stupendous dish? Why, thank you, Donatello.
Not you, Irma.
I was talking about that satellite dish.
Oh.
It's just like a man to choose TV over me.
Donatello, next time you get a brainstorm, make it a small one.
Good luck, guys.
Come back with my satellite dish, you sewer-dwelling swamp rats! Chill out, dude.
We're just borrowing it.
Yeah, do you mind? We're only trying to save the earth from total disaster.
The closer we get to the center of the reverse gravity force, the harder it is for the turtle blimp to fly.
I'm not sure our motors can handle this.
We'll have to go in with just the glider.
We're moving closer.
The reverse gravity force is taking over.
Raphael, Michelangelo.
Aim the satellite dish at the reverse-gravity field.
Like what's the plan, man? There's no time to explain.
Just do it! That's it.
Pour it on.
It worked! Boy, it sure did.
How'd we do it? Simple.
We reversed the reverse gravity.
I knew I should have never let shredder handle this.
Now I'll do it my way.
Hey.
What's happening? Someone's cranked the power up full blast.
The only thing better than maximum power is super maximum power.
Hey, Donatello, what happens when too much reverse gravity hits too much reverse gravity? You know, that's a good question, Raphael And I think it's about to get answered.
Yeow! Here, Raphael.
Grab on.
Oh, thanks.
Hey, how come I fell down instead of up? Looks like gravity is back to normal.
Oops.
Uh-oh.
April's boss is gonna be mondo ticked off.
Know where can we get about 8 tons of epoxy glue? Hey, what's going on? First we floating and then we're falling.
Yeah.
I wish gravity would make up its stupid mind.
Looks like shredder's about to get a couple of bundles from heaven.
Now where are rock steady and bebop? D'oh! Hi, boss.
Oh, you nuclear-age numskulls! Where have you been? Oh, here and there.
Blast it! Those turtles foiled us again.
You wretched reptiles! You'll pay for this.
Yeah, and bring cash.
[SNORTS.]
We don't take plastic.
Uh-oh.
Shredder and his goons are getting away! Freeze, sleaze.
Sayonara, you shell-backed simpletons.
Come back here, shred head.
Let's tangle.
Ow! Ouch! You should be happy, fellas.
Shredder escaped, but at least we saved the city.
Oh, yeah, we're dancing in the streets.
Ouch! Ooh! Yike! Ow! Donatello, how is the repair work on the satellite dish progressing? All finished, master, and it's as good as new.
Donatello, you're wonderful.
The dish is repaired and the city is saved.
Hey, hey, hey, hey, we had something to do with it, too, you know.
Gangway, dudes.
Hot pizzas coming through.
Are those for the victory celebration? Heck, no.
They're for me.
Michelangelo, what about your diet? Master, I spent the entire day being lighter than air.
It was a total bummer.
I'm just gonna make sure I never float away again.
[GIGGLES.]
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