Georgie and Mandy's First Marriage (2024) s03e06 Episode Script

1
I can't read your writing.
New brakes for the Camaro.
Or the Camry?
That's definitely a C.
I got a Jetta and a Miata back there.
Huh. Maybe give 'em a test drive,
see which one don't stop.
I'll figure it out.
Huh.
Why are you ordering so many tires?
Well, we are a tire store.
But there's more to this
business than just sales,
there's other KPIs
we need to think about.
KPI? That some of your
business school BS?
See? I can do letters, too.
KPI. Key performance indicator.
Can't you just talk regular?
You first.
I need to buy a bunch of tires
so I can sell a bunch of
tires. It ain't complicated.
I'm just saying, we looked
at a case study in my class
on how Toyota optimized their inventory
so they can have more cash on hand.
Just 'cause you're
taking business classes
don't make you better than me.
Not better, just smarter,
more knowledgeable.
I guess you can say "better."
Yeah? Well I got something
they can't teach in school: Instinct.
You can't run a business on instincts.
My instincts say you can.
I knew I shouldn't have
bought this store with you.
Guess you should've
followed your instincts.
Oh, Connor, I ran
into that friend of yours
- from high school.
- Which one?
The one that was over here all the time.
I think he had a crush on me.
That was Larry. He had a crush on Mom.
He was a hugger.
Anyway, he asked if you were
going to your ten-year reunion.
Ten years? Wow, that was fast.
Time flies when you live
over your parents' garage.
So, are you going?
I don't know.
I can't wait to go
to my ten-year reunion.
Well, you're gonna have to,
'cause it's about ten years away.
That's funny, 'cause
Mandy's was five years ago,
which means her 20th
is gonna be before
Okay, thank you.
Don't you have to graduate to be invited
to your high school reunion?
Oh, I'll be invited. And you know why?
Millionaires get invited to everything.
[SCOFFS] Honey,
you're not a millionaire.
Not yet, but I will be.
And when I go, everyone's gonna see
you don't need high school
or college to be a success.
Well, not everybody does,
but I sure learned a lot in college.
We know. We've all
seen you play beer pong.
We've also seen her on TV.
Thank you.
Yeah, at my reunion
I'm gonna have my hot TV wife on my arm
and hundred-dollar bills
falling out of my pocket.
I wish I had your confidence.
If I could bottle it and sell it,
I'd already be a millionaire.
Hey.
What are you doing here?
You keep saying how great this class is.
I'm here to be impressed.
You're just trying to annoy me.
Smart. I'm impressed.
Don't embarrass me.
I ain't gonna embarrass you.
Okay, class, let's get started.
[DOOR CLOSES]
Your professor's a lady?
Oh, my God.
Tonight, we'll be talking about
how the new tax code
affects small business expansion.
Excuse me, I have a quick question.
No, you don't.
I'm sorry, are you in this class?
He's not, throw him out.
I'm not a student yet,
but I thought I'd come
kick the tires before I signed up.
Oh, okay.
That joke's funnier if you
know I own a tire store.
Ruben, don't you also own a tire store?
I do.
Do you know this gentleman?
Yeah.
So, are you partners or rivals?
[LAUGHS]
Yeah.
We're actually making a lot of money,
so if you want us to share any of our
real-world experiences,
just say the word.
Well, I appreciate that,
but this class is based on
my own experience running a business.
Business slow? That why
you're teaching on the side?
Actually, I sold my
company a few years ago.
What kind of company?
The kind that Texas Instruments bought
for four million dollars.
She owned a software company
that she sold to Texas Instruments.
She?
Yes, Mandy, women
can be businessmen, too.
[SCOFFS] Well, I'm
just glad you had fun.
I told her about my supply chain ideas
and she said I was an
"outta-the-box thinker."
Oh, good for you.
That was my problem in high school.
All the teachers wanted
me to think in the box.
And to show up to class.
You're sounding really
"in-the-box" right now.
How does Ruben feel
about you crashing his class?
He hates it.
But he's just worried about Patricia
liking me more than him.
Patricia?
Don't worry, she's old.
Although she is loaded, so
Well, just remember,
I will take you for half.
You know, this whole
thing made me realize
if there's something I'm interested in,
I'm just as much of a
genius as my brother.
Sheldon went to college at 12.
Yeah, and if tire college was a thing,
that could've been me.
What you got going today?
Well, I'm gonna drop
CeeCee off at preschool,
then hit the dry
cleaners, grocery store.
What about you?
Clean out the gutters, and, uh,
been meaning to fix that
light switch in the closet.
I'm gonna restring my ukulele,
so looks like we all have busy days.
Hey, you thought any
more about your reunion?
Yeah, I don't think I'm going.
[GASPS] Really? I had a blast at mine.
Well, that's 'cause you were popular.
Nobody cares about that anymore.
You know, everybody just wants to gossip
about who got fat and divorced.
I am slim and single.
See? You should go.
He doesn't want to, Amanda.
Why are you pushing him?
Well, I just think he would have fun.
I'll think about it.
Oh, uh, little tip.
If somebody shows you
a picture of their baby,
don't ask what's wrong with it.
Why would you do that?
It was wearing a helmet.
No.
Don't you remember how hard
high school was for Connor?
He struggled,
he was bullied.
Even after you left the house.
Now everyone's gonna be
talking about their careers
and houses and families.
It's just gonna make him feel bad.
Why? He has no
bills, no responsibilities,
and he can sleep with anybody he wants.
Huh.
Now I feel bad.
Hey, did you do the reading
for this week's class?
Yeah.
Great, can I borrow your book?
No.
Fine, I'll buy my own.
What do they cost like, 20 bucks?
Try 80.
For a book?
Is it full of lottery tickets?
Cut it out. You're just
trying to piss me off.
That is how it started,
but now I'm actually interested.
Well, too bad. You can't just show up
halfway through a semester.
It's night school.
You give 'em a hundred bucks,
you do whatever you want.
This isn't a joke, Georgie.
I'm the first person in
my family to go to college.
Well, I'm the first person in
my family to go at a normal age.
Do you know what they
sacrificed to get me here?
[SCOFFS]
Mine's sacrificing, too.
CeeCee's missing me doing
all the voices at story time.
No one does The Cat
in the Hat like this guy.
I've busted my ass nights and weekends,
and you think you can just waltz in
and keep up in an advanced course?
Do you know how arrogant that is?
You're just worried I'm
gonna do better than you.
No, I'm worried you're
gonna waste everyone's time
trying to impress the professor.
You mean Patricia?
I know her first name, too.
One of the keys to franchising
is building brand loyalty.
So, how do we do that?
- Ruben.
- Consistent quality of work.
People want to know they're
getting the same great service
no matter where they go.
Very good.
Thank you Patricia.
Sure, the work is important,
but I think it's
the personality that
keeps bringing 'em back.
You can't franchise personality.
I disagree.
People go to a business
because they trust a face.
Your Colonel Sanders,
your Ronald McDonald.
The face of our
business is also a clown.
Okay, let's just get back to the
If you think it's an insult to
compare me to Ronald McDonald,
one of the greatest
businessmen of all time
it ain't.
Oh, my God. Do you see
- what I'm dealing with?
- GEORGIE: Do you see
what I'm dealing with,
having to drag him kicking and screaming
into every good idea?
Why do you think you always know best?
'Cause I got street smarts.
There's another term for that.
- It's "book dumb."
- Gotten me this far.
Didn't get you through
high school, did it?
He's a dropout.
You know what? Screw you.
In my defense, that was, like,
three years of bottled-up anger.
Hey.
Really? Not talking?
Fine.
Ah.
[ROCK MUSIC PLAYING]
[HIP-HOP PLAYING]
Pump up the bass, keep the show live ♪
Ah.
Pump up the bass, keep the show live ♪
I'm a natural-born k ♪
[ROCK MUSIC PLAYING]
Tonight's the night,
you're on my list ♪
[HIP-HOP PLAYING]
My whole life, been
doing the same thing ♪
[ROCK MUSIC PLAYING]
[HIP-HOP PLAYING]
- [ROCK MUSIC PLAYING]
- [RADIO STOPS]
This is stupid.
You calling me stupid?
I didn't say you're stupid, I said
this is stupid.
Well, I guess I didn't
understand you because I'm a dropout.
You realize you started this
by showing up to my class?
No, you started this by
acting like you going to school
makes you better than me.
You think you're better than everyone.
At everything.
Y'all open?
- Course we're open!
- How can we help you?!
Can I borrow the car tomorrow night?
For what?
I'm gonna go to my reunion after all.
Oh.
Really?
That's it?
I think "oh" covered it.
So, can I have the car?
Well, it's just so last-minute.
- Did you even RSVP?
- I did.
Oh.
What is going on? Do
you not want me to go?
- [SCOFFS]
- No, look, it-it
it's just that your mother and I
are a little worried that
Audrey, how'd you put it?
We just don't want you
to feel bad about yourself.
Why would I feel bad about myself?
- Oh, you shouldn't.
- I don't.
And I don't want anyone
to make you feel that way.
You're making me feel that way.
And I love you,
so imagine how they'll make you feel.
Unbelievable.
Oh.
Maybe we shouldn't have said anything.
You didn't!
[GROANS]
Oh, you doing some homework?
Trying to study for a quiz.
Let's see.
"Competitive Strategy in
Business Administration."
[SCOFFS] Can't wait for the movie.
Listen to this.
"Franchising is an expansion strategy
"that allows for greater ROIC
"by accelerating GMP
while leveraging external
entrepreneurial capital."
Aw, now I know how it ends.
How can anyone understand this junk?
You know, if you don't want to do this,
you don't have to do it.
Yes, I do.
Ruben doesn't think I can,
and I need to shove it in his face.
Well, as long as it's
for the right reasons.
You're just not used to studying.
Oh Let me help you. I can be your TA.
Everyone's got to
stop talking in letters.
Teacher's assistant.
Look, I'm sure there's
a glossary in the back
where you just look up
what these terms mean.
Each one? That's gonna take forever.
Well, how about this?
Every time you look
one up and memorize it,
I will undo a button.
Okay.
Let's see
ROIC.
"Return on investment capital."
Huh. That actually makes sense.
That's the money you get back
for the money you put in.
Mm. Nice job.
I'm starting to get
why people like college.
GMP.
"Global market"
Think we may need a
different study method.
No, it's working,
GMP, general
- Nope.
- Dang it.
Key performance
indicator.
What you doing?
Uh, studying.
Hm, that's how I used to cheat.
Flunked algebra 'cause
I stepped in a puddle.
I hate this.
It's like high school all over again.
What do you mean?
I was Sheldon's idiot brother,
then I finally found
something I was smart at.
At least I thought I was.
Here I am, cheating on a quiz
like I'm in tenth grade.
If it makes you feel better,
looks like I'm the same
loser I was back then.
You ain't a loser.
You're not an idiot.
I don't remember what KPI means,
and I just wrote it on my shoe.
I guess some part of us always
feels like we did in high school.
Well, you shouldn't.
My parents think I should.
They don't want me to go to my reunion.
That's crazy.
You had a song on the
radio. Your band went on tour.
I got arrested.
That don't make you a loser,
that makes you interesting.
Who would you rather talk to,
some insurance salesman
or a hardened criminal?
It was only a misdemeanor.
Hey, you spent the night in jail.
You're right.
That changes a man.
Thanks.
That helped.
Of course.
Wait, isn't there anything
you want to say to me?
Actually, yes, get
your shoe off the table.
We eat there.
Morning.
Oh, we talking today?
I ain't in the mood.
Worried about the quiz?
I'll give you the answer
to the first question.
Your name is Georgie Cooper.
I dropped the class this
morning. You happy?
No. I wanted you to drop
after I kicked your butt on the quiz.
I was gonna hang 'em both right here.
Stupid college won't even
give me my money back.
What kind of business is that?
What if we just charged
people for a year of oil changes
whether they use 'em or not?
If only we could.
Right?
Actually, why can't we?
'Cause no one would do it.
They would if they thought
they were saving money.
What are you talking about?
We charge 'em 50 bucks a
year for unlimited oil changes.
They're getting a good deal
if they come in three times.
But most people won't.
Exactly.
Plus, we're getting
all that money up front,
so we can use all that
capital business word
to do our
KPIs.
Not how you use KPI, but keep talking.
And we renew them every year.
If they don't cancel, we
just keep charging 'em.
That's good.
That part I got from Columbia House.
I'm still paying for
albums I don't want.
I hate what a great idea this is.
Actually, I take that back.
I hate you for what
a great idea this is.
And I hate you for how good
you are at the school stuff.
[CHUCKLES] Partnership built on hate.
I think this could last.
Worked for Tom and Jerry.
And you don't even
have to go to class tonight.
Oh, they ain't ripping me off.
I'm going and I'm gonna pass that quiz.
'Cause you wrote the
answers on your shoe?
Outside the box, baby.
There you go.
- You look great.
- I do, don't I?
And just remember, if you
run out of things to talk about,
you can always tell
them that your sister
is the second-most watched
weathergirl in Medford.
Aren't there only two?
You don't have to say that part.
I'm glad Georgie convinced me to go.
I also said you should go.
Look at that you're the
second-most convincing person
- in this house.
- [SCOFFS]
Well, what did he say that was so great?
He reminded me that I'm interesting.
You are.
I know.
So I'm gonna go and be interesting.
What's that mean?
Everything's fine, just
smile, it's not my fault.
- What
- Smile!
Well, I'm off.
Bringing the accordion, huh?
Can't show up alone, that'd be weird.
Well, have a good time.
Oh, we will.
Don't look at me, Georgie
told him to be interesting.
They are gonna eat him alive.
Poor Connor.
[PLAYING "96 TEARS" ON ACCORDION]
[CHEERING]
Got you a drink.
Oh, my hands are full.
Just hold it up to my lips.
[PLAYING "EL CABLE"]