Superjail! (2007) s03e09 Episode Script
Planet Radio
Oh, life on the outside ain't what it used to be You know, the world's gone crazy, and it ain't safe on the street Well, it's a drag, and I know There's only one place to go I'm coming home Whoa, yeah I'm coming home Good morning, Superjail! You're listening to 98.
5 The Ray! This hellhole's number-one voice of freedom.
Sounds like number 2 to me! Get off my frequency, rodent! Speaking of number 2, Here's what Rat thinks about That B.
S.
Work duty warden is shoveling on us.
Shut up, hack.
They Ray will lead the revolution.
Don't eat that cafeteria slop.
It's laced with cough suppressant.
Hey, like a horse took a dump in your bowl! Turn that crap down! You turn that crap dow You're listening to 98.
5 The Ray.
Jared: What if this incites the inmates even more? I mean, whoever they are, The Ray and the Rat have lots of loyal listeners.
Warden: No prisoner of mine is gonna miss some Cowardly voice on a staticky old radio.
Jared: I Won't I mean, they won't! Warden: Nope, but I'm going to give them And how did high-school gym class Make you feel? Alice: I don't know.
Different, I guess.
Warden: You are different.
You're a beautiful, strong woman.
Right, audience? Yeah! Warden: When we come back, Alice tells us about the first time She stole her mother's personal massager.
And someone in this audience gets A brand-new pruno maker! Enough with the daytime talk, huh? What else is on? Give me that.
Jared: A heat wave is taste.
Jailpup! He's not even a real dog! I thought we should talk.
I'm all ears.
We both want to destroy that idiot And rule the airwaves.
Maybe it's time we join our forces And build a new empire! Where are your forces? Jared: "Jailpup" is definitely the breakout show of the season! Warden: Really? Warden: Oh, don't be so in character! Jared: I don't remember us green-lighting Some of these other series.
Warden: TV isn't rocket science.
It's brain candy! All you have to do is trust your gut.
Jared: Well, whatever you're doing, it's working.
It's time for "Jailpup.
" Looks like we're all out of worms, Gary I mean Pop.
Good thing I brought one of my own.
What is it, Jailpup? Is China stuck in the septic tank again? Don't go! Come back, Jailpup! I'm sorry! Today's program is bought to you by the number 2.
They are playing our show.
We ought to be in pictures.
Two Hello, Superjail! This is the Ray! And rat! We've joined forces, And we're broadcasting together live.
From Planet Radio! What?! Planet Radio? Yes! Planet Radio! You can smell the airwaves of freedom.
Here at Planet Radio, We can say whatever we want And do what ever we want! Today we have a special guest hostage In the studio.
Jared: Sir! Warden: Green light! I love mimes! Jared, let's give these two artistes Their own variety hour.
Jared: Sir! Alice: There's something weird going on around here.
Warden: Oh, Alice, you've been watching too much "extreme phobia facers.
" Jared: They've got Jailpup I mean, Jailbot! Two Two Where's "Jailpup"? Did you mess with the channel settings? No, just turned it on.
All I know Is that puppy gives me something to live for.
It's just a show.
Don't be scared, boy.
Everybody just wants you to come home, Jailpup.
I know I can't save you.
Maybe Timmy can! Hey, everybody! Listen up! Who wants to go save Jailpup?! Yeah! Jared: They want all security systems disabled, Plus some serious money! That'll be the day.
Alice: Don't rats carry disease or something? Warden: Plague! Oh, my dear, sweet necrotized Alice.
Jared, where is Planet Radio? I want this fetid vermin obliterated From my universe! Jared: I'm sorry, sir, But without Jailbot, Our surveillance capability is caput.
They could be anywhere.
Done! Jailpup! Two Yeah! Yeah! Jailpup! Nooo! Timmy's here for you! Wake up, boy! It's time to come back now.
You you can't leave like this, boy! You're my puppy! I'll never let anyone molest you again! You haven't heard the last of me! Two Two
5 The Ray! This hellhole's number-one voice of freedom.
Sounds like number 2 to me! Get off my frequency, rodent! Speaking of number 2, Here's what Rat thinks about That B.
S.
Work duty warden is shoveling on us.
Shut up, hack.
They Ray will lead the revolution.
Don't eat that cafeteria slop.
It's laced with cough suppressant.
Hey, like a horse took a dump in your bowl! Turn that crap down! You turn that crap dow You're listening to 98.
5 The Ray.
Jared: What if this incites the inmates even more? I mean, whoever they are, The Ray and the Rat have lots of loyal listeners.
Warden: No prisoner of mine is gonna miss some Cowardly voice on a staticky old radio.
Jared: I Won't I mean, they won't! Warden: Nope, but I'm going to give them And how did high-school gym class Make you feel? Alice: I don't know.
Different, I guess.
Warden: You are different.
You're a beautiful, strong woman.
Right, audience? Yeah! Warden: When we come back, Alice tells us about the first time She stole her mother's personal massager.
And someone in this audience gets A brand-new pruno maker! Enough with the daytime talk, huh? What else is on? Give me that.
Jared: A heat wave is taste.
Jailpup! He's not even a real dog! I thought we should talk.
I'm all ears.
We both want to destroy that idiot And rule the airwaves.
Maybe it's time we join our forces And build a new empire! Where are your forces? Jared: "Jailpup" is definitely the breakout show of the season! Warden: Really? Warden: Oh, don't be so in character! Jared: I don't remember us green-lighting Some of these other series.
Warden: TV isn't rocket science.
It's brain candy! All you have to do is trust your gut.
Jared: Well, whatever you're doing, it's working.
It's time for "Jailpup.
" Looks like we're all out of worms, Gary I mean Pop.
Good thing I brought one of my own.
What is it, Jailpup? Is China stuck in the septic tank again? Don't go! Come back, Jailpup! I'm sorry! Today's program is bought to you by the number 2.
They are playing our show.
We ought to be in pictures.
Two Hello, Superjail! This is the Ray! And rat! We've joined forces, And we're broadcasting together live.
From Planet Radio! What?! Planet Radio? Yes! Planet Radio! You can smell the airwaves of freedom.
Here at Planet Radio, We can say whatever we want And do what ever we want! Today we have a special guest hostage In the studio.
Jared: Sir! Warden: Green light! I love mimes! Jared, let's give these two artistes Their own variety hour.
Jared: Sir! Alice: There's something weird going on around here.
Warden: Oh, Alice, you've been watching too much "extreme phobia facers.
" Jared: They've got Jailpup I mean, Jailbot! Two Two Where's "Jailpup"? Did you mess with the channel settings? No, just turned it on.
All I know Is that puppy gives me something to live for.
It's just a show.
Don't be scared, boy.
Everybody just wants you to come home, Jailpup.
I know I can't save you.
Maybe Timmy can! Hey, everybody! Listen up! Who wants to go save Jailpup?! Yeah! Jared: They want all security systems disabled, Plus some serious money! That'll be the day.
Alice: Don't rats carry disease or something? Warden: Plague! Oh, my dear, sweet necrotized Alice.
Jared, where is Planet Radio? I want this fetid vermin obliterated From my universe! Jared: I'm sorry, sir, But without Jailbot, Our surveillance capability is caput.
They could be anywhere.
Done! Jailpup! Two Yeah! Yeah! Jailpup! Nooo! Timmy's here for you! Wake up, boy! It's time to come back now.
You you can't leave like this, boy! You're my puppy! I'll never let anyone molest you again! You haven't heard the last of me! Two Two