How to Sell Drugs Online: Fast (2019) s04e03 Episode Script
That Shouldn't Happen!
1
[theme music for "Kill
the Cook" playing]
Hey, you lot, what's up?
Those who know me know I have
two great passions in life.
Call of Duty: Warzone
and cream puffs.
Today we're testing
some frozen products.
All defrosted in just five minutes
for a snack between streaming
or for the occasional
unwelcome visitors.
- [loud crash]
- [man] Police! Show me your hands!
- Hands up!
- Are you still there?
We know who we're after.
Check the beanbag! The
drugs are in the beanbag!
- No, not the beanbag!
- [police] Quiet!
[streamer] I got sent that
by a sponsor last week! Ah!
- [police] Sure.
- [streamer] You're hurting me!
- [police] There's nothing in there.
- [streamer] Violence isn't the answer.
[police] There's
nothing in there.
[police] All units, no
drugs in the beanbag.
[streamer] I've got cream
puffs in my eyes. I'm innocent!
- [police] Cameras off!
- [Bene sighs]
THE DRUGS ARE IN THE BEANBAG
BEST HIDING PLACE
Come on, my dumplings.
I know how boring it is,
hunting criminals online.
But your cybercrime unit can't keep making
my lads turn up somewhere every week.
[exhales loudly] I'm sure
that he knew we would come.
And I'm sure that your secret informant
is dying of laughter at all you mugs
'cause he's fooled the
police for the third time.
If you want us to continue
taking your department seriously,
maybe you should reconsider your
secret relationship with your friend.
I don't want you hopping
around crime scenes either.
Just stick to your podcast.
[with contempt] Cybercrime
[door slams shut]
[sighs]
[theme music playing]
[Moritz] Betrayal.
A thread that runs
through mankind's history.
Judas, Brutus, Lennard Sander.
[sighs]
EMPLOYMENT CONTRAC
WITHOUT 2 PER CEN
It's always the same.
Your closest confidant keeps
nothing but secrets from you.
Then he lies to you.
Then he tries to take away
everything which is rightfully yours.
But history also taught us
that those who are ruthless,
should think first about
who they're messing with.
I'M OUTSIDE!
'Cause one thing all
traitors have in common
is they pay a high
price for their acts.
[Moritz grunts]
Man, I'm so hungry.
- Pizza.
- Okay. The plan is actually easy, yeah?
BonusLife right now is
looking for a new investor.
We will use a stooge to make
an offer which is so good
that their mouths will water
at the mere sight of it.
Then we'll use your boss's cash
to buy 49 per cent of the company.
You know how a hostile
takeover functions, right?
- Lenny and Dan'll still have the majority.
- Lenny, Dan, and I.
According to my contract, I'm entitled
to two per cent of the company.
And 49 plus 2 means
Lenny and Dan
becoming our servants.
[Moritz] Exactly. From now on,
I'm gonna be the most dedicated,
undismissable employee ever.
Then I'll take care of the cash.
- Huh? I thought the cash was safe.
- It is. In principle.
In principle? Without the
money we can forget the thing.
I have to explain to Behzat
why it's a good move.
And Behzat won't want to give us
money for some overhyped bullshit.
The numbers have been checked.
The business is profitable
and still growing.
A miracle considering its CEO.
- Just take care of the money, okay?
- Sure, man.
I've wanted to do
something real for so long.
You think I'd let this
chance slip away? Tsk.
[electric crackling]
- [door slams]
- [Jens] Moritz?
You have a visitor.
What does he want?
I told you about the body I found. We have
a strong suspicion that it was murder.
I have a strong suspicion.
The police, not the postman.
- What's this got to do with me?
- I'm sure you remember our agreement?
[foreboding music playing]
I still have a few frozen
cream puffs in the basement.
They're really handy when you have
unexpected visitors. If you
- Yes, please.
- Sounds good.
I think somehow your
app's been hacked.
[Moritz] I admit it.
I did a deal with
the state police.
[suspenseful music playing]
But I didn't betray anyone.
I programmed a spyware so the
criminals would betray themselves.
And the state police
could arrest them.
So this is how
the spyware works.
My virus disguises itself
as a software update.
That's how it installs itself
on the dealers' phones.
as soon as a phone is infected,
it mirrors all the phone's incoming
and outgoing messages on your laptop.
Without the user knowing.
So can I read them, yeah?
WhatsApp, Signal,
Telegram. You name it.
You'd have done the same
for four years of freedom.
If you had my skill set.
The day before, they were texting
that the drugs were in the beanbag.
I'm 100 per cent sure
they knew we were coming.
Can they see that I'm
able to read the messages?
Impossible. The spyware on the
phone is completely invisible.
Or it'd be a shit program. And
I don't program shit programs.
Moritz, I could really do
with some help from you.
This is about
large-scale drug dealing.
And there are even connections
to a string of murders.
There are already
five dead people.
Something is going on.
Something awful.
I can't get to the
top of the gang.
Something that's "awful".
You should stop making
that podcast, man.
I know I took a wrong
turn a few years ago.
I can't be bothered any more.
With bodies or drug
dealers and the like.
I have a legal thirty 37.5-hour week,
so I'm pretty tired in the evenings.
I'm afraid I just don't have
time to do your job as well.
If you really wanna
hear my opinion,
you don't have a digital
problem but an analogue one.
Have you ever thought that a
colleague is passing on information?
[Jens] Aren't you
staying for coffee?
Maybe I could help
you with something?
Uh
[tense music playing]
[keyboard clicking]
[message sent alert]
[keyboard clicking continues]
- What?
- Hmm?
[engine starts]
[music fades]
- [Ilir] Sure we put them away properly?
- [Abnor] Watch out!
- [Ilir] They look happy to me.
- [Abnor] Keep your hands steady.
[Lisa] Hello! Lisa
Novak. From WATZ.
Our friend Mr Zimmermann said I
could ask you a few questions.
- [Ilir] Hmm.
- [Abnor] What's she doing here?
[Ilir] I forgot. Moritz
called. Said we should talk.
- [Abnor] Who'll take care of the bees?
- [Ilir] Come on, we owe him a favour.
[Abnor] Okay, come on.
[Ilir] Do you like
honey in your tea?
[clears throat]
[Lisa] Thank you.
That's just for me. I can
turn it off anytime you want.
Moritz said you might have information
for me about the recent murders here?
What murders?
The bodies in Rinseln
that have been discovered.
It was a big story
in the papers.
Well, we don't read the papers.
We don't give a shit about
what the mainstream media
is blathering on about.
- We don't like the press particularly.
- [Lisa, coughing] Oh!
But Moritz said that you've got
out of the business. Is that right?
Keeping bees is
our only concern.
Anything else, we're
not interested.
I can assure you that you'll
be completely anonymous.
There's no need to worry.
[bees buzzing]
We only make honey.
And that's it!
[softly] Okay, then.
[unsettling music playing]
Yeah.
There's probably been
a misunderstanding.
Thanks a lot for the tea
and the really good honey.
[clears her throat]
Also, one more thing.
I believe we actually
have a mutual friend.
Maarten from Rotterdam?
Very interesting dude.
He supplied MyDrugs with drugs.
And then he suddenly disappeared.
Should really look
into that someday.
Yeah. If you ever see
him, send him my regards.
- Ciao.
- Ciao.
[Abnor] See you.
[music becomes suspenseful]
[music fades]
[sighs]
[car door opens]
[tense music playing]
All right. I'll tell
you what I know.
You haven't got a clue about
them. They're dangerous.
[sinister music playing]
[printer whirring]
EMPLOYMENT CONTRAC
- [Moritz] Morning.
- [woman] Morning.
[sighs]
[Moritz] Tomato sauce, eh? You
should have soaked it first.
It's all dried on. Where's
the washing up liquid?
Erm, Moritz, I have to go to Dan's office,
but I need to speak to you about
Lenny, I'm sorry. Just a sec.
Mm-m. Delicious.
About Ersan, I never thought
he'd just suddenly turn up here.
Mm-m.
We know each other from prison. Now
he thinks we're something like
best friends.
But I already have
a best friend.
Thanks for the chance
you're giving me.
I really appreciate it, after
what's happened the last few years.
I can see how happy you are here.
I do just want the best for you.
And maybe Dan isn't actually
the shittiest boss in the world.
[chuckles]
Everything's perfect
just the way it is.
What did you want to say?
Er, so, erm
- Yeah, thing is this two per cent
- What?
What about it?
[soft music playing]
[Lenny exhales]
Dan, um
He just asked if you could
just not tell anyone else?
Don't want everyone to think
they'll get two per cent, huh?
Ah sure. Yeah, yeah.
Shh.
You guys are the best. Thanks.
[tinny synthesiser
scale playing]
Oh, a plate got forgotten.
[mysterious music playing]
Fuck.
[Dan panting]
What are you doing?
Ah!
[groans]
Um, I
My contact lens fell out.
Ah There it is!
Did you speak to Mo?
Oh.
It's like he's a new person.
No really. I feel like
he's so really good.
I was really surprised
myself. "Great boss", he said.
About you.
Well, not exactly.
He said you're not
the worst boss.
Even so.
So that says you didn't take the
shares out of his contract maybe?
Um. No, yeah.
Erm
- Yeah, the shares are out.
- Oh, I see.
Did he cry again?
No, he took it pretty well.
You shouldn't mention it to him though
'cause he's a bit awkward around you.
- [knocking]
- Come.
Hey.
Sorry, but do you want
a piece of banana bread?
Marie baked it for
TikTok yesterday.
I could put it in the smoothie
maker if you'd prefer?
So, Bonus meal style.
Nice view.
Mm.
Mm, sorry, that was everything.
You're probably busy finding
investors at the moment.
I guess they're probably
not easy to find.
No, it was easy. Have one, yeah.
Alexander von Hessenburg. He
offered a million for 49 per cent.
My coach is checking
the details,
but I'm gonna close the
deal in the next 48 hours.
[swallows loudly]
Wow.
That's really cool.
Well
"You have to be pretty
driven to make it possible."
[sniffs] Richard Branson.
[energetic music playing]
DONATES 5 MILLION EUROS
RENOVATES 100 SCHOOLS
SUSTAINABLE PROJECTS
FOUNDS CHARITY
THE SAVIOUR DONATES HIS MILLIONS
THE PHILANTHROPIS
OF A GENERATION!
[rhythmic knocking]
- Hey.
- [Ersan] Hey, whoa!
There you are. They've already
decided on an investor.
We've only got 48 hours
to find a fake investor
who we can use to
make a better offer.
- [sighs]
- What?
This is the M 1000
headquarters? Crazy.
- Did you hear what I said?
- Yeah, I've sorted it.
Just check out
financecapitalinvestmentfund.com.
Financecapitalinvestmentfund.com.
INVEST WITH VISION
Thought up the name myself.
- Ungoogleable.
- And this is your work?
Yeah, of course. Plus,
I used an old domain.
This thing is inconspicuous.
I INVEST IN OUR FUTURE
All we need is a person
we can send there.
Huh? Couldn't Behzat do it?
- I mean, it is his money.
- Okay, how can I break this to you.
The start-up world pretends
to be young and cosmopolitan.
But they're all just mid-sized
companies with a foosball table.
Behind them is the finance
sector, and they're even worse.
If they have a choice between
an Alexander von Hessenburg
or a friendly penguin guy from
a working migrant family
We need a middle-aged,
heterosexual, white man.
With a standard German
name. A Thomas Müller.
And best, someone who
has nothing to lose.
Or someone who
urgently needs money.
[dramatic music playing]
Or both.
Herr Zimmermann. Hello.
I'm a coach. And you are
the shooting guard. Boom!
[screams]
[music over car radio]
[snores]
Oh.
Really great job.
- See you next week.
- Cheers.
And always remember,
if there's a crash
behind, there's money
[farts]
[groans in relief]
WHEELER DRIVING SCHOOL
No. No. Go away! Go away!
I just want to speak
to you quickly.
- I have something to
- I have pepper spray.
[Ersan] Is that deodorant?
This is lime deodorant.
- It burns like hell.
- I just wanted to Aargh!
Fuck!
You son of a bitch!
You're the son of a bitch!
Thanks to you my bloody foot was
shot. Do you know how much that hurt?
I had to go into hiding
for months, son of a bitch!
Hey, enough!
Let's all calm ourselves
down a bit now.
Emotions have no place
here. Not on the road.
- [Moritz groans]
- Who the hell are you?
- [engine roars]
- [tyres squeal]
Thirty thousand for buying
shares in a company for you?
Why don't you just
do it yourselves?
Sixty if you don't ask
any more questions.
- Stop! Shit.
- [tyres squealing]
Concentrate, man.
- You know a stop sign.
- [Ersan] Fuck!
Sorry. It's my first lesson.
- Slow down, slow down.
- You don't have a licence?
- I was in prison.
- Wait, bro. Let me drive. No, bro.
[Ilgen] Hey, stop,
Stop. Calmly now.
A hundred thousand.
Not a euro less.
And I'll throw in for
you a Class B licence.
- Eyes on the road!
- Watch the road!
- [tyres squealing]
- Ah! Maniac.
[Ilgen groans]
- [upbeat pop music playing]
- [keyboard clacking]
- [Moritz] Ersan?
- You can see what I'm working with.
[Moritz] Thomas Müller is perfect.
Google just gets the footballer.
[Ersan] Finance reports,
investment portfolios,
website, X account, LinkedIn
It needs to be super legit.
[Ilgen] I'd say we
have a business case.
[Moritz] That's exactly the
kind of arsehole Dan likes.
Now we have to make Dan a higher
offer than this von Hessenburg.
[woman] We're talking about how
the improved user experience
changes our results.
Of course, we should rest
- [phone alert chimes]
- how quickly that can happen with Hitman.
Hitman, isn't that a
semi-cool fashion brand?
1.1 MILLION EUROS
FOR 49% OF THE SHARES
- [music fades]
- Great, erm, thanks. Really exciting.
Sorry, I had an appointment drop.
Lenny, a sec? It's important.
Uh Technical.
[upbeat music resumes]
We now have to focus on two things,
our target group and our future goals.
[music fades]
- [man] So?
- [Benedikt] Hmm?
How's your informant doing?
Has he provided you with
any more false intelligence?
I've been thinking.
Isn't it possible
Well, theoretically, that
it's one of our colleagues?
Apart from us there was only one
person who knew about the beanbag.
[enigmatic music playing]
Err Eh?
Ha!
Now listen here, dumpling.
You get information from an informer, and
nobody's allowed to know the identity.
And when the information isn't true,
you accuse one of our own people?
Just tell me who
your informant is,
and we'll charge him with
making a false statement.
He's either laughing at you,
or he's giving information
twice and is doubling up.
RESPONSE OFFER
[Ersan] "We are delighted to tell you
that the CEO Daniel Pirmin Riffert
has included your offer
on the shortlist."
Yeah. Now we just have to
make sure that it works.
- Our Mr Müller is offering more money.
- Yeah, well money isn't everything.
- Hey. Hi.
- Hi.
What's up?
Are you getting our retired police
dog to search through my room?
No, I just wanted to quickly
say hello to your new friend.
What Susi does is up to her.
Your sister's just concerned
for you. It's nice.
No one cares about me, man.
Can you leave my room now?
The three of us can
chill together, right?
If my brother was
fresh out of jail,
I'd take everything apart
twice a day. No offence.
And to be honest, family is
cool, but supervision is better.
Just because Moritz is your brother
doesn't mean you have to trust him.
Susi, it's time to
brush your teeth. Come.
[electronic music playing]
[grunts] Paradoxical intention.
"By confronting someone with
their own way of thinking,
you can get them to do the
opposite of what they want to do."
Viktor Frankl.
Third Viennese School
of Psychotherapy.
Right, gotta go. Jeff Bezos
says eight hours sleep is key.
[kisses]
Bye.
[door closes]
[mysterious music playing]
Thing is, this Thomas Müller guy, we
can't find out anything about him.
We just keep getting
this footballer.
It's a good offer, but
we can't trust him.
I'm still for von Hessenburg.
That's cool. Then we've come
to a quick decision. Lenny?
Yeah, so Yeah, I also think
von Hessenburg is better.
[Güler] I'll let
Thomas Müller know.
- [knocking]
- [Moritz] Hey, me again.
Sorry, I don't
mean to bother you.
I'm sure you're discussing
something technical.
I just wanted to
bring some muffins.
I googled von Hessenburg
guy yesterday.
I know this is way beyond my pay grade,
but he's definitely the safer choice.
I mean, 54 company holdings,
only one insolvency?
He also invests fairly
extensively in retail.
That means supply chains,
access to supermarkets
May not sound super sexy,
but if you want BonusLife to grow,
this is definitely the next step.
- Mmm.
- [Moritz] Logistics, logistics!
I also hear he's super precise.
He'll check every fact, number,
contract down to the finest detail.
If it was up to me to say, von
Hessenburg would be my man.
Ah, but you're already on it.
Help yourselves.
They're sugar-free.
Dan. [chuckles softly]
Good luck.
[Güler] Okay. Ha.
Then I'll make sure von Hessenburg
receives the important documents
- Let's have Thomas Müller.
- Yeah, think so too.
- What?
- Go with Thomas Müller.
Just because that little pimp
said he'd go with von Hessenburg?
You said yourself that Thomas
Müller made a good offer.
[Güler] Yeah, true. But I
only said that so you
We're definitely going
with Thomas Müller.
Moritz doesn't get
to make decisions.
The two of us are
responsible for the business.
Paradoxical intention. Viktor Frankl,
Third Viennese School of Psychotherapy.
[rhythmic music playing]
It's child's play.
There's a positive
side to betrayal too.
It shows the true face
of the people around you.
You are no longer
distracted by feelings,
but you can concentrate on
the facts and your goals.
I can ascertain that all
the murders are related.
- And I know who's behind them.
- What happened to knocking?
I thought you young people are
super sensitive about safe spaces?
Sorry.
Constantly
apologising's also shit.
Well, what is it?
I've found someone who can
confirm the whole story.
[Ilgen] It's pretty cosy here.
But, of course, we have to think a
little bigger about the whole thing.
I'm thinking a BonusLife campus.
Bigger.
[chuckles softly]
Bigger. Bigger.
[Moritz] If people
didn't betray one another
the world would probably
never move forward.
IT‘S WORKING. THEY LOVE HIM.
[alert chimes]
[Ersan, voice message]
Nice, Bro. One little thing.
Behzat wants to meet you before
he sends us the money. Bye.
[thunder rumbling]
[Moritz] I thought
you sorted the money.
The money has to be in the
account by the day after tomorrow.
Behzat wants to have a meal with us.
That's how he does business. Old school.
You know what business
boomers are like.
[Benedikt] 37.5-hour
week, my arse!
Hey Amira, sorry if I was
a bit weird this week.
I thought that Never mind.
I think I know who's
passing on information.
You won't believe who it was.
Great story for the podcast.
Title, "The cream puff
caught out in the cold."
Well, maybe we can
have a brainstorm.
I'm gonna have a
look first. See ya.
[tense music playing]
[Benedikt] Welcome
to TatütaTalk,
your favourite podcast for everyone
who wants more police in their lives.
It's me, Benedikt, from
the cybercrime unit.
Shit.
Today, I'm going to tell
you the unbelievable story
of the biggest criminal
in Rinseln's history.
[thunder rumbling]
Weird that we've never
heard anything about him.
[Lisa] Behzat Aygün's history
was nothing unusual at first.
His parents came to
Germany with nothing.
Now, after many years of hard work,
he's boss of his own frozen food empire
with a friendly penguin mascot.
That's not Brotinchen.
That looks like a
dog.
Behzat's a genius. He
does a lot of business.
Frozen foods, this and that
Four golds in the
mid-sized business awards.
Three hundred employees. Filling
and packaging is fully automated.
It's an amazing achievement.
Most people like us get the door
slammed in their face by the banks.
[Benedikt] In a fairer world, this
kind of story would never happen.
[Lisa] When Brofrost was in crisis,
not a single bank helped him.
It was almost like they
wanted him to go bankrupt.
Then, suddenly, things
picked up again.
And in the balance sheets, there's
no clue as to how he managed that.
[Benedikt] A great mystery.
And who's behind it all?
I used to deliver frozen foods
for them, know what I mean?
Yeah, but that's all over.
When he sees your
business capabilities,
he'll make all our
dreams come true.
[Ersan knocks]
- [Behzat] Oh, Ersan!
- Selam abi.
- How nice. Aw.
- [woman] I'll put the microwave on.
[Behzat laughs]
This is Moritz, my business
partner, and best friend.
Moritz, I've heard
so much about you.
We're on first-name terms
here. I hope that's okay?
Yeah. [laughs]
- Cold food, warm company.
- [Ersan laughs]
You have a very impressive
company. Ersan's showed me.
What do you think
about Brotinchen?
It's, um
Classic?
Yes, exactly.
Cute, isn't he? With the
big eyes and the fat nose.
Yeah but, our
marketing people
I mean, Micky and Goofy can't
suddenly turn into dogs.
Actually Goofy is a dog.
- I thought Pluto was a dog.
- He is. They're both dogs, yeah.
So why does Goofy walk on
two legs and Pluto on four?
I hope you're hungry.
[Behzat] Aah. Everything you see here
can be bought ready-made from us.
- In restaurant quality.
- [Ersan] In restaurant quality, bro!
A bit of spice.
Mmm.
Thank you.
Now tell me about this
"Bonus Monus" thing, yeah?
[Moritz coughs]
- Too spicy?
- [Moritz chokes]
It's okay.
BonusLife sells nutritional
supplements for gamers,
people who have a poor diet, 'cause
they play computer games all day.
I know the idea sounds dumb, but
there's a huge market for it.
The company seems to
be very successful.
So the idea can't be that dumb.
The idea's ingenious.
The current CEO is one of
those nutrition freaks.
These nerds are really into it.
Just 'cause something works
doesn't make it ingenious.
But it is definitely a good
scalable business case.
[laughs] "A good
scalable business case"!
And when the current CEO is gone,
there could be real profits to be made.
I thought the company
was already profitable.
It is, yeah! Moritz had
the numbers checked.
They're large and looking good.
So why do you want to get
rid of the head people then?
There's room to make it better.
Well, it sounds to me like you
have an invoice outstanding.
[Behzat and Ersan
converse in Turkish]
- [in English] Is there a problem?
- No.
No problem.
You're not eating.
You don't like it?
Oh, it's super.
[Behzat and Ersan
continue in Turkish]
TRANSLATE AI TRANSLATOR
[Benedikt in English] The
clues in the cold case
lead straight to the
Brofrost headquarters.
Brr.
An ice cold business.
[Lisa] But the police are
receiving more and more tips.
The guy is no longer
eliminating all his competitors.
Now he's killing
some of his own lot.
It's a mole he's looking for.
[Benedikt] Because Brofrost is clearly
nothing more than a front business.
Thanks to the cybercrime unit,
which is an irreplaceable part of the
state police and no laughing stock,
we were finally able to stop
the biggest criminal there's
ever been in Rinseln,
Moritz fucking Zimm
[metal items rattling]
[Behzat speaks Turkish]
A POLICE OFFICER
KNOWS OUR EVERY MOVE
WE HAVE A MOLE
WE HAD TO ICE FIVE
PEOPLE BECAUSE OF THIS
WE STILL HAVEN'T FOUND HIM.
[stomach gurgling]
[Behzat in English] Moritz?
Are you okay? Was it too spicy?
- Where are the toilets?
- The last door on the left.
[suspenseful fades in]
["Waltz of the Snowflakes"
from The Nutcracker playing]
[stomach gurgling]
[panting]
[stomach gurgling intensifies]
[moans]
[groans]
[Moritz] First left.
Oh God. Thank you.
Shit, shit, shit, shit, shit.
[stomach gurgling]
Where is it then? [grunts]
Oh no. Where is this
fucking toilet
[man groaning with effort]
[man] Now get in there.
Damn it. Come on.
Bend your legs. Come on!
- [stomach gurgling]
- [panicked breathing]
[fast harp music playing]
[music stops abruptly]
- [stomach gurgling]
- [Moritz panting]
- [lofty choral music playing]
- Huh?
Oh God.
No, no, no, no,
no, no, no, no, no.
[phone alert chimes]
[final chords of
orchestral piece playing]
[groans]
Fuck.
Shit.
["Waltz of the Snowflakes"
from The Nutcracker playing]
[theme music for "Kill
the Cook" playing]
Hey, you lot, what's up?
Those who know me know I have
two great passions in life.
Call of Duty: Warzone
and cream puffs.
Today we're testing
some frozen products.
All defrosted in just five minutes
for a snack between streaming
or for the occasional
unwelcome visitors.
- [loud crash]
- [man] Police! Show me your hands!
- Hands up!
- Are you still there?
We know who we're after.
Check the beanbag! The
drugs are in the beanbag!
- No, not the beanbag!
- [police] Quiet!
[streamer] I got sent that
by a sponsor last week! Ah!
- [police] Sure.
- [streamer] You're hurting me!
- [police] There's nothing in there.
- [streamer] Violence isn't the answer.
[police] There's
nothing in there.
[police] All units, no
drugs in the beanbag.
[streamer] I've got cream
puffs in my eyes. I'm innocent!
- [police] Cameras off!
- [Bene sighs]
THE DRUGS ARE IN THE BEANBAG
BEST HIDING PLACE
Come on, my dumplings.
I know how boring it is,
hunting criminals online.
But your cybercrime unit can't keep making
my lads turn up somewhere every week.
[exhales loudly] I'm sure
that he knew we would come.
And I'm sure that your secret informant
is dying of laughter at all you mugs
'cause he's fooled the
police for the third time.
If you want us to continue
taking your department seriously,
maybe you should reconsider your
secret relationship with your friend.
I don't want you hopping
around crime scenes either.
Just stick to your podcast.
[with contempt] Cybercrime
[door slams shut]
[sighs]
[theme music playing]
[Moritz] Betrayal.
A thread that runs
through mankind's history.
Judas, Brutus, Lennard Sander.
[sighs]
EMPLOYMENT CONTRAC
WITHOUT 2 PER CEN
It's always the same.
Your closest confidant keeps
nothing but secrets from you.
Then he lies to you.
Then he tries to take away
everything which is rightfully yours.
But history also taught us
that those who are ruthless,
should think first about
who they're messing with.
I'M OUTSIDE!
'Cause one thing all
traitors have in common
is they pay a high
price for their acts.
[Moritz grunts]
Man, I'm so hungry.
- Pizza.
- Okay. The plan is actually easy, yeah?
BonusLife right now is
looking for a new investor.
We will use a stooge to make
an offer which is so good
that their mouths will water
at the mere sight of it.
Then we'll use your boss's cash
to buy 49 per cent of the company.
You know how a hostile
takeover functions, right?
- Lenny and Dan'll still have the majority.
- Lenny, Dan, and I.
According to my contract, I'm entitled
to two per cent of the company.
And 49 plus 2 means
Lenny and Dan
becoming our servants.
[Moritz] Exactly. From now on,
I'm gonna be the most dedicated,
undismissable employee ever.
Then I'll take care of the cash.
- Huh? I thought the cash was safe.
- It is. In principle.
In principle? Without the
money we can forget the thing.
I have to explain to Behzat
why it's a good move.
And Behzat won't want to give us
money for some overhyped bullshit.
The numbers have been checked.
The business is profitable
and still growing.
A miracle considering its CEO.
- Just take care of the money, okay?
- Sure, man.
I've wanted to do
something real for so long.
You think I'd let this
chance slip away? Tsk.
[electric crackling]
- [door slams]
- [Jens] Moritz?
You have a visitor.
What does he want?
I told you about the body I found. We have
a strong suspicion that it was murder.
I have a strong suspicion.
The police, not the postman.
- What's this got to do with me?
- I'm sure you remember our agreement?
[foreboding music playing]
I still have a few frozen
cream puffs in the basement.
They're really handy when you have
unexpected visitors. If you
- Yes, please.
- Sounds good.
I think somehow your
app's been hacked.
[Moritz] I admit it.
I did a deal with
the state police.
[suspenseful music playing]
But I didn't betray anyone.
I programmed a spyware so the
criminals would betray themselves.
And the state police
could arrest them.
So this is how
the spyware works.
My virus disguises itself
as a software update.
That's how it installs itself
on the dealers' phones.
as soon as a phone is infected,
it mirrors all the phone's incoming
and outgoing messages on your laptop.
Without the user knowing.
So can I read them, yeah?
WhatsApp, Signal,
Telegram. You name it.
You'd have done the same
for four years of freedom.
If you had my skill set.
The day before, they were texting
that the drugs were in the beanbag.
I'm 100 per cent sure
they knew we were coming.
Can they see that I'm
able to read the messages?
Impossible. The spyware on the
phone is completely invisible.
Or it'd be a shit program. And
I don't program shit programs.
Moritz, I could really do
with some help from you.
This is about
large-scale drug dealing.
And there are even connections
to a string of murders.
There are already
five dead people.
Something is going on.
Something awful.
I can't get to the
top of the gang.
Something that's "awful".
You should stop making
that podcast, man.
I know I took a wrong
turn a few years ago.
I can't be bothered any more.
With bodies or drug
dealers and the like.
I have a legal thirty 37.5-hour week,
so I'm pretty tired in the evenings.
I'm afraid I just don't have
time to do your job as well.
If you really wanna
hear my opinion,
you don't have a digital
problem but an analogue one.
Have you ever thought that a
colleague is passing on information?
[Jens] Aren't you
staying for coffee?
Maybe I could help
you with something?
Uh
[tense music playing]
[keyboard clicking]
[message sent alert]
[keyboard clicking continues]
- What?
- Hmm?
[engine starts]
[music fades]
- [Ilir] Sure we put them away properly?
- [Abnor] Watch out!
- [Ilir] They look happy to me.
- [Abnor] Keep your hands steady.
[Lisa] Hello! Lisa
Novak. From WATZ.
Our friend Mr Zimmermann said I
could ask you a few questions.
- [Ilir] Hmm.
- [Abnor] What's she doing here?
[Ilir] I forgot. Moritz
called. Said we should talk.
- [Abnor] Who'll take care of the bees?
- [Ilir] Come on, we owe him a favour.
[Abnor] Okay, come on.
[Ilir] Do you like
honey in your tea?
[clears throat]
[Lisa] Thank you.
That's just for me. I can
turn it off anytime you want.
Moritz said you might have information
for me about the recent murders here?
What murders?
The bodies in Rinseln
that have been discovered.
It was a big story
in the papers.
Well, we don't read the papers.
We don't give a shit about
what the mainstream media
is blathering on about.
- We don't like the press particularly.
- [Lisa, coughing] Oh!
But Moritz said that you've got
out of the business. Is that right?
Keeping bees is
our only concern.
Anything else, we're
not interested.
I can assure you that you'll
be completely anonymous.
There's no need to worry.
[bees buzzing]
We only make honey.
And that's it!
[softly] Okay, then.
[unsettling music playing]
Yeah.
There's probably been
a misunderstanding.
Thanks a lot for the tea
and the really good honey.
[clears her throat]
Also, one more thing.
I believe we actually
have a mutual friend.
Maarten from Rotterdam?
Very interesting dude.
He supplied MyDrugs with drugs.
And then he suddenly disappeared.
Should really look
into that someday.
Yeah. If you ever see
him, send him my regards.
- Ciao.
- Ciao.
[Abnor] See you.
[music becomes suspenseful]
[music fades]
[sighs]
[car door opens]
[tense music playing]
All right. I'll tell
you what I know.
You haven't got a clue about
them. They're dangerous.
[sinister music playing]
[printer whirring]
EMPLOYMENT CONTRAC
- [Moritz] Morning.
- [woman] Morning.
[sighs]
[Moritz] Tomato sauce, eh? You
should have soaked it first.
It's all dried on. Where's
the washing up liquid?
Erm, Moritz, I have to go to Dan's office,
but I need to speak to you about
Lenny, I'm sorry. Just a sec.
Mm-m. Delicious.
About Ersan, I never thought
he'd just suddenly turn up here.
Mm-m.
We know each other from prison. Now
he thinks we're something like
best friends.
But I already have
a best friend.
Thanks for the chance
you're giving me.
I really appreciate it, after
what's happened the last few years.
I can see how happy you are here.
I do just want the best for you.
And maybe Dan isn't actually
the shittiest boss in the world.
[chuckles]
Everything's perfect
just the way it is.
What did you want to say?
Er, so, erm
- Yeah, thing is this two per cent
- What?
What about it?
[soft music playing]
[Lenny exhales]
Dan, um
He just asked if you could
just not tell anyone else?
Don't want everyone to think
they'll get two per cent, huh?
Ah sure. Yeah, yeah.
Shh.
You guys are the best. Thanks.
[tinny synthesiser
scale playing]
Oh, a plate got forgotten.
[mysterious music playing]
Fuck.
[Dan panting]
What are you doing?
Ah!
[groans]
Um, I
My contact lens fell out.
Ah There it is!
Did you speak to Mo?
Oh.
It's like he's a new person.
No really. I feel like
he's so really good.
I was really surprised
myself. "Great boss", he said.
About you.
Well, not exactly.
He said you're not
the worst boss.
Even so.
So that says you didn't take the
shares out of his contract maybe?
Um. No, yeah.
Erm
- Yeah, the shares are out.
- Oh, I see.
Did he cry again?
No, he took it pretty well.
You shouldn't mention it to him though
'cause he's a bit awkward around you.
- [knocking]
- Come.
Hey.
Sorry, but do you want
a piece of banana bread?
Marie baked it for
TikTok yesterday.
I could put it in the smoothie
maker if you'd prefer?
So, Bonus meal style.
Nice view.
Mm.
Mm, sorry, that was everything.
You're probably busy finding
investors at the moment.
I guess they're probably
not easy to find.
No, it was easy. Have one, yeah.
Alexander von Hessenburg. He
offered a million for 49 per cent.
My coach is checking
the details,
but I'm gonna close the
deal in the next 48 hours.
[swallows loudly]
Wow.
That's really cool.
Well
"You have to be pretty
driven to make it possible."
[sniffs] Richard Branson.
[energetic music playing]
DONATES 5 MILLION EUROS
RENOVATES 100 SCHOOLS
SUSTAINABLE PROJECTS
FOUNDS CHARITY
THE SAVIOUR DONATES HIS MILLIONS
THE PHILANTHROPIS
OF A GENERATION!
[rhythmic knocking]
- Hey.
- [Ersan] Hey, whoa!
There you are. They've already
decided on an investor.
We've only got 48 hours
to find a fake investor
who we can use to
make a better offer.
- [sighs]
- What?
This is the M 1000
headquarters? Crazy.
- Did you hear what I said?
- Yeah, I've sorted it.
Just check out
financecapitalinvestmentfund.com.
Financecapitalinvestmentfund.com.
INVEST WITH VISION
Thought up the name myself.
- Ungoogleable.
- And this is your work?
Yeah, of course. Plus,
I used an old domain.
This thing is inconspicuous.
I INVEST IN OUR FUTURE
All we need is a person
we can send there.
Huh? Couldn't Behzat do it?
- I mean, it is his money.
- Okay, how can I break this to you.
The start-up world pretends
to be young and cosmopolitan.
But they're all just mid-sized
companies with a foosball table.
Behind them is the finance
sector, and they're even worse.
If they have a choice between
an Alexander von Hessenburg
or a friendly penguin guy from
a working migrant family
We need a middle-aged,
heterosexual, white man.
With a standard German
name. A Thomas Müller.
And best, someone who
has nothing to lose.
Or someone who
urgently needs money.
[dramatic music playing]
Or both.
Herr Zimmermann. Hello.
I'm a coach. And you are
the shooting guard. Boom!
[screams]
[music over car radio]
[snores]
Oh.
Really great job.
- See you next week.
- Cheers.
And always remember,
if there's a crash
behind, there's money
[farts]
[groans in relief]
WHEELER DRIVING SCHOOL
No. No. Go away! Go away!
I just want to speak
to you quickly.
- I have something to
- I have pepper spray.
[Ersan] Is that deodorant?
This is lime deodorant.
- It burns like hell.
- I just wanted to Aargh!
Fuck!
You son of a bitch!
You're the son of a bitch!
Thanks to you my bloody foot was
shot. Do you know how much that hurt?
I had to go into hiding
for months, son of a bitch!
Hey, enough!
Let's all calm ourselves
down a bit now.
Emotions have no place
here. Not on the road.
- [Moritz groans]
- Who the hell are you?
- [engine roars]
- [tyres squeal]
Thirty thousand for buying
shares in a company for you?
Why don't you just
do it yourselves?
Sixty if you don't ask
any more questions.
- Stop! Shit.
- [tyres squealing]
Concentrate, man.
- You know a stop sign.
- [Ersan] Fuck!
Sorry. It's my first lesson.
- Slow down, slow down.
- You don't have a licence?
- I was in prison.
- Wait, bro. Let me drive. No, bro.
[Ilgen] Hey, stop,
Stop. Calmly now.
A hundred thousand.
Not a euro less.
And I'll throw in for
you a Class B licence.
- Eyes on the road!
- Watch the road!
- [tyres squealing]
- Ah! Maniac.
[Ilgen groans]
- [upbeat pop music playing]
- [keyboard clacking]
- [Moritz] Ersan?
- You can see what I'm working with.
[Moritz] Thomas Müller is perfect.
Google just gets the footballer.
[Ersan] Finance reports,
investment portfolios,
website, X account, LinkedIn
It needs to be super legit.
[Ilgen] I'd say we
have a business case.
[Moritz] That's exactly the
kind of arsehole Dan likes.
Now we have to make Dan a higher
offer than this von Hessenburg.
[woman] We're talking about how
the improved user experience
changes our results.
Of course, we should rest
- [phone alert chimes]
- how quickly that can happen with Hitman.
Hitman, isn't that a
semi-cool fashion brand?
1.1 MILLION EUROS
FOR 49% OF THE SHARES
- [music fades]
- Great, erm, thanks. Really exciting.
Sorry, I had an appointment drop.
Lenny, a sec? It's important.
Uh Technical.
[upbeat music resumes]
We now have to focus on two things,
our target group and our future goals.
[music fades]
- [man] So?
- [Benedikt] Hmm?
How's your informant doing?
Has he provided you with
any more false intelligence?
I've been thinking.
Isn't it possible
Well, theoretically, that
it's one of our colleagues?
Apart from us there was only one
person who knew about the beanbag.
[enigmatic music playing]
Err Eh?
Ha!
Now listen here, dumpling.
You get information from an informer, and
nobody's allowed to know the identity.
And when the information isn't true,
you accuse one of our own people?
Just tell me who
your informant is,
and we'll charge him with
making a false statement.
He's either laughing at you,
or he's giving information
twice and is doubling up.
RESPONSE OFFER
[Ersan] "We are delighted to tell you
that the CEO Daniel Pirmin Riffert
has included your offer
on the shortlist."
Yeah. Now we just have to
make sure that it works.
- Our Mr Müller is offering more money.
- Yeah, well money isn't everything.
- Hey. Hi.
- Hi.
What's up?
Are you getting our retired police
dog to search through my room?
No, I just wanted to quickly
say hello to your new friend.
What Susi does is up to her.
Your sister's just concerned
for you. It's nice.
No one cares about me, man.
Can you leave my room now?
The three of us can
chill together, right?
If my brother was
fresh out of jail,
I'd take everything apart
twice a day. No offence.
And to be honest, family is
cool, but supervision is better.
Just because Moritz is your brother
doesn't mean you have to trust him.
Susi, it's time to
brush your teeth. Come.
[electronic music playing]
[grunts] Paradoxical intention.
"By confronting someone with
their own way of thinking,
you can get them to do the
opposite of what they want to do."
Viktor Frankl.
Third Viennese School
of Psychotherapy.
Right, gotta go. Jeff Bezos
says eight hours sleep is key.
[kisses]
Bye.
[door closes]
[mysterious music playing]
Thing is, this Thomas Müller guy, we
can't find out anything about him.
We just keep getting
this footballer.
It's a good offer, but
we can't trust him.
I'm still for von Hessenburg.
That's cool. Then we've come
to a quick decision. Lenny?
Yeah, so Yeah, I also think
von Hessenburg is better.
[Güler] I'll let
Thomas Müller know.
- [knocking]
- [Moritz] Hey, me again.
Sorry, I don't
mean to bother you.
I'm sure you're discussing
something technical.
I just wanted to
bring some muffins.
I googled von Hessenburg
guy yesterday.
I know this is way beyond my pay grade,
but he's definitely the safer choice.
I mean, 54 company holdings,
only one insolvency?
He also invests fairly
extensively in retail.
That means supply chains,
access to supermarkets
May not sound super sexy,
but if you want BonusLife to grow,
this is definitely the next step.
- Mmm.
- [Moritz] Logistics, logistics!
I also hear he's super precise.
He'll check every fact, number,
contract down to the finest detail.
If it was up to me to say, von
Hessenburg would be my man.
Ah, but you're already on it.
Help yourselves.
They're sugar-free.
Dan. [chuckles softly]
Good luck.
[Güler] Okay. Ha.
Then I'll make sure von Hessenburg
receives the important documents
- Let's have Thomas Müller.
- Yeah, think so too.
- What?
- Go with Thomas Müller.
Just because that little pimp
said he'd go with von Hessenburg?
You said yourself that Thomas
Müller made a good offer.
[Güler] Yeah, true. But I
only said that so you
We're definitely going
with Thomas Müller.
Moritz doesn't get
to make decisions.
The two of us are
responsible for the business.
Paradoxical intention. Viktor Frankl,
Third Viennese School of Psychotherapy.
[rhythmic music playing]
It's child's play.
There's a positive
side to betrayal too.
It shows the true face
of the people around you.
You are no longer
distracted by feelings,
but you can concentrate on
the facts and your goals.
I can ascertain that all
the murders are related.
- And I know who's behind them.
- What happened to knocking?
I thought you young people are
super sensitive about safe spaces?
Sorry.
Constantly
apologising's also shit.
Well, what is it?
I've found someone who can
confirm the whole story.
[Ilgen] It's pretty cosy here.
But, of course, we have to think a
little bigger about the whole thing.
I'm thinking a BonusLife campus.
Bigger.
[chuckles softly]
Bigger. Bigger.
[Moritz] If people
didn't betray one another
the world would probably
never move forward.
IT‘S WORKING. THEY LOVE HIM.
[alert chimes]
[Ersan, voice message]
Nice, Bro. One little thing.
Behzat wants to meet you before
he sends us the money. Bye.
[thunder rumbling]
[Moritz] I thought
you sorted the money.
The money has to be in the
account by the day after tomorrow.
Behzat wants to have a meal with us.
That's how he does business. Old school.
You know what business
boomers are like.
[Benedikt] 37.5-hour
week, my arse!
Hey Amira, sorry if I was
a bit weird this week.
I thought that Never mind.
I think I know who's
passing on information.
You won't believe who it was.
Great story for the podcast.
Title, "The cream puff
caught out in the cold."
Well, maybe we can
have a brainstorm.
I'm gonna have a
look first. See ya.
[tense music playing]
[Benedikt] Welcome
to TatütaTalk,
your favourite podcast for everyone
who wants more police in their lives.
It's me, Benedikt, from
the cybercrime unit.
Shit.
Today, I'm going to tell
you the unbelievable story
of the biggest criminal
in Rinseln's history.
[thunder rumbling]
Weird that we've never
heard anything about him.
[Lisa] Behzat Aygün's history
was nothing unusual at first.
His parents came to
Germany with nothing.
Now, after many years of hard work,
he's boss of his own frozen food empire
with a friendly penguin mascot.
That's not Brotinchen.
That looks like a
dog.
Behzat's a genius. He
does a lot of business.
Frozen foods, this and that
Four golds in the
mid-sized business awards.
Three hundred employees. Filling
and packaging is fully automated.
It's an amazing achievement.
Most people like us get the door
slammed in their face by the banks.
[Benedikt] In a fairer world, this
kind of story would never happen.
[Lisa] When Brofrost was in crisis,
not a single bank helped him.
It was almost like they
wanted him to go bankrupt.
Then, suddenly, things
picked up again.
And in the balance sheets, there's
no clue as to how he managed that.
[Benedikt] A great mystery.
And who's behind it all?
I used to deliver frozen foods
for them, know what I mean?
Yeah, but that's all over.
When he sees your
business capabilities,
he'll make all our
dreams come true.
[Ersan knocks]
- [Behzat] Oh, Ersan!
- Selam abi.
- How nice. Aw.
- [woman] I'll put the microwave on.
[Behzat laughs]
This is Moritz, my business
partner, and best friend.
Moritz, I've heard
so much about you.
We're on first-name terms
here. I hope that's okay?
Yeah. [laughs]
- Cold food, warm company.
- [Ersan laughs]
You have a very impressive
company. Ersan's showed me.
What do you think
about Brotinchen?
It's, um
Classic?
Yes, exactly.
Cute, isn't he? With the
big eyes and the fat nose.
Yeah but, our
marketing people
I mean, Micky and Goofy can't
suddenly turn into dogs.
Actually Goofy is a dog.
- I thought Pluto was a dog.
- He is. They're both dogs, yeah.
So why does Goofy walk on
two legs and Pluto on four?
I hope you're hungry.
[Behzat] Aah. Everything you see here
can be bought ready-made from us.
- In restaurant quality.
- [Ersan] In restaurant quality, bro!
A bit of spice.
Mmm.
Thank you.
Now tell me about this
"Bonus Monus" thing, yeah?
[Moritz coughs]
- Too spicy?
- [Moritz chokes]
It's okay.
BonusLife sells nutritional
supplements for gamers,
people who have a poor diet, 'cause
they play computer games all day.
I know the idea sounds dumb, but
there's a huge market for it.
The company seems to
be very successful.
So the idea can't be that dumb.
The idea's ingenious.
The current CEO is one of
those nutrition freaks.
These nerds are really into it.
Just 'cause something works
doesn't make it ingenious.
But it is definitely a good
scalable business case.
[laughs] "A good
scalable business case"!
And when the current CEO is gone,
there could be real profits to be made.
I thought the company
was already profitable.
It is, yeah! Moritz had
the numbers checked.
They're large and looking good.
So why do you want to get
rid of the head people then?
There's room to make it better.
Well, it sounds to me like you
have an invoice outstanding.
[Behzat and Ersan
converse in Turkish]
- [in English] Is there a problem?
- No.
No problem.
You're not eating.
You don't like it?
Oh, it's super.
[Behzat and Ersan
continue in Turkish]
TRANSLATE AI TRANSLATOR
[Benedikt in English] The
clues in the cold case
lead straight to the
Brofrost headquarters.
Brr.
An ice cold business.
[Lisa] But the police are
receiving more and more tips.
The guy is no longer
eliminating all his competitors.
Now he's killing
some of his own lot.
It's a mole he's looking for.
[Benedikt] Because Brofrost is clearly
nothing more than a front business.
Thanks to the cybercrime unit,
which is an irreplaceable part of the
state police and no laughing stock,
we were finally able to stop
the biggest criminal there's
ever been in Rinseln,
Moritz fucking Zimm
[metal items rattling]
[Behzat speaks Turkish]
A POLICE OFFICER
KNOWS OUR EVERY MOVE
WE HAVE A MOLE
WE HAD TO ICE FIVE
PEOPLE BECAUSE OF THIS
WE STILL HAVEN'T FOUND HIM.
[stomach gurgling]
[Behzat in English] Moritz?
Are you okay? Was it too spicy?
- Where are the toilets?
- The last door on the left.
[suspenseful fades in]
["Waltz of the Snowflakes"
from The Nutcracker playing]
[stomach gurgling]
[panting]
[stomach gurgling intensifies]
[moans]
[groans]
[Moritz] First left.
Oh God. Thank you.
Shit, shit, shit, shit, shit.
[stomach gurgling]
Where is it then? [grunts]
Oh no. Where is this
fucking toilet
[man groaning with effort]
[man] Now get in there.
Damn it. Come on.
Bend your legs. Come on!
- [stomach gurgling]
- [panicked breathing]
[fast harp music playing]
[music stops abruptly]
- [stomach gurgling]
- [Moritz panting]
- [lofty choral music playing]
- Huh?
Oh God.
No, no, no, no,
no, no, no, no, no.
[phone alert chimes]
[final chords of
orchestral piece playing]
[groans]
Fuck.
Shit.
["Waltz of the Snowflakes"
from The Nutcracker playing]