Beyond Paradise (2023) s04e04 Episode Script
Season 4, Episode 4
1
Her cheeks were red
Her eyes were brown ♪
Her hair in ringlets hanging down ♪
She'd a lovely face
without a frown ♪
just as the tide was flowing. ♪
HE GRUNTS
Ah!
HE PANTS
I gotcha.
MARTHA: Have you done it?
Oh, ye of little fai
WATER HISSES, HE SPLUTTERS
HE COUGHS
HE PANTS
HE CLEARS THROA
WATER HISSES, MARTHA SHRIEKS
Oh, sorry! Sorry!
Oh, gosh! Sorry.
You didn't turn the
SHRIEKS: stopcock off!
Oh! Oh!
MARTHA SHRIEKS
All right, all right! Got it.
Ah!
HE EXHALES
BOTH LAUGH
MARTHA SHRIEKS
God!
Oh, yeah. Stopcock.
That's a good idea.
- We need to call a plumber.
- Well, er
MARTHA SHRIEKS
I'll call one now.
- Humphrey.
- Yeah?
In the past hour, you've stapled
yourself to a cupboard,
fitted a letterbox upside down,
and now flooded the kitchen.
I'm sensing your mind is elsewhere.
Sorry.
Oh, don't be sorry.
Just talk to me.
I've got your mum shadowing
me at the station
as part of her induction
into the police panel.
But, worse, I've got Mr Smith pressing
for who I'm going to lose,
and I haven't even told anyone
they're under review.
When do you have to make your decision?
End of the week.
SHE EXHALES
Maybe honesty is the best policy.
Just tell them what's going on.
It's an impossible situation.
They'll understand.
HE EXHALES
HE SNORES LIGHTLY
Big night, was it?
No. Looks like it.
If you must know, I was
chatting with Agnieszka.
Oh!
She's here now, then?
Online.
She was a bit upset. She lost her job.
Don't tell me any more.
Can guess the rest.
- Morning, sir.
- Morning.
Y-Yes. Er, morning.
Talking of imaginary women,
the fish market was buzzing this morning.
Someone spotted
the Mermaid of Shipton Abbott
- last night.
- Oh. Where?
Jeff Simmons swears he saw her
out by Tideline Seaweed Farms.
Oh, I'd love to see a mermaid.
Just because people believe it,
doesn't make it true.
- Ooh!
- Huh?
Er, what do you think, sir?
- Sir?
- Hmm?
Someone's seen a mermaid.
This is usually where you start getting
carried away by a bit of local nonsense.
Yeah.
Is everything all right?
You seem a bit stressed.
Oh no. Er
I've I've got
I've got some, er
Well, I've got something to tell you all.
DOOR CLOSES Um
SHE EXHALES Yes.
Er, Anne will be joining us today
Morning, team!
as part of her role
in the police committee.
ANNE: Now, don't worry.
I want you all to carry on
exactly as you would if I wasn't here.
And the more I know about what you
actually do, the more I can support it.
I'll need a desk.
Oh, we've got a spare one here.
Thank you, Kelby.
Thank you. That's very helpful.
Yes. Thank you, Kelby.
You won't even notice I'm here.
PHONE RINGS
Might explain the DI's stress.
So what's on the agenda for today?
Tideline Farms.
Someone's sabotaged their seaweed lines.
That's where they saw the mermaid.
- MARGO: They're on their way.
- Excellent. Um Yes, Anne.
Margo will show you the ropes while we,
er we three, will, er
go and see what happened.
Oh.
SHE CHUCKLES
ESTHER: Kelby's questioning the staff,
but before we start this investigation,
can we agree that
the Mermaid of Shipton Abbott
didn't sabotage Tideline Farms?
HUMPREY CHUCKLES
Our job is to keep
an open mind, Sergeant.
It's all just old fishermen's tales.
Silly superstition
to wind the grockles up.
Talking of Tideline,
this is where they started.
The council was given a grant
to restore these old workshops,
then rent them out at a reasonable
rate to help new business.
Tideline's took off within
the first couple of years,
so moved to bigger premises.
HUMPHREY EXHALES
Sabotaging a seaweed farm
seems a bit extreme, don't you think?
I mean, it's hardly controversial.
Depends who you ask.
How so?
Some reckon it's saving the planet.
Soaks carbon,
replaces plastic, feeds cows.
Others say it ruins the
view, kills fishing and tourism.
And Tideline?
Want to expand, grow the
business, create more jobs.
Applied for it twice before.
Both times blocked.
Locals weren't having it.
How big are we talking?
270 acres.
HE WHISTLES
Off-limits to fishermen, paddle
boards, swimmers, the lot.
That's about, what, 200 football pitches?
No wonder the locals aren't happy.
We used to sneak into these
tunnels when we were kids.
Bit of music, couple of ciders.
No-one knew we were here.
Is this a confession
to breaking and entering?
HUMPHREY CHUCKLES
They run underneath this entire building.
WOMAN: These nets were found
this morning, weighed down with stones
to pull the seaweed out of the sunlight.
If they'd succeeded,
we'd be facing a failed harvest.
That's not all. I got this.
"Stop your expansion plans
or face the consequences."
It was shoved through our office door.
I found it this morning.
Any CCTV? Private security?
No. Regretting that now.
We've got a final appeal hearing
about the expansion tomorrow. 10am.
With Marine Management and the council.
I can't believe someone hates
what we're doing this much.
I put everything into this business.
Word is, we might finally get approved.
Someone clearly doesn't want that.
Yes. Or some thing.
Do you know of anyone in particular
who's against the planned expansion?
Honestly? Half the town.
I'm scared.
This isn't grumbling
in some parish newsletter.
Thi This is malicious.
It feels like there's
a target on my back.
PHONE BUZZES
Oh.
I'm really sorry, I'm late for a meeting.
Will you let me know what you find?
- OK.
- Yeah.
Kelby, can we get this
sent to the lab, please?
Prints, if we're lucky.
- Sir.
- Find anything?
The Tideline crew
found the nets at 5:30am.
Last clear check was 6pm yesterday,
so sabotage happened overnight.
All right.
Well, now
what's this?
Not seen one like this before.
Let me guess.
You collected shells
- I collected shells at school.
- at school. Bet you were popular.
She was moving fast below the surface.
Saw her long tail, flashing
electric blue in the sea sparkle.
Could only be one thing. A mermaid.
How close?
Right below me.
Popped up again well past the lines.
Tail arcs, down she goes again.
Blink
then gone. Just like that.
- It's extraordinary.
- Aye.
Magic, it were.
I know what folks say.
"Jeff be proper mazed."
But I know what I saw.
What were you doing out so late?
Night fishing. Not so odd.
Tide was right.
Sleeping all right?
On any meds? Mixing
anything home-brewed?
HE SCOFFS
- Did you see any other boat?
- Nah.
Just me
and her.
The Mermaid of Shipton Abbott.
You tell me what else can swim
through sea sparkle and then just vanish.
You ever pull one of these up
in your nets?
Can't say I have.
Odd - looking thing, innit?
Mind if I borrow one?
I don't care. Help yourself.
Super.
You know, mermaids have
been spotted throughout history
as long as humans have sailed.
On ships sailed by a load of
lonely men drinking cheap rum,
which pretty much describes
Jeff Simmons, too.
HE CHUCKLES
Only 5% of the ocean's
explored, Sergeant.
Who's to know what's out there?
The sea hides all manner
of strange things.
AUTOMATED MESSAGE: Please leave
your message after the tone. TONE
MARTHA: Hello. Me again. Could you
call me back as soon as possible, please?
Thanks. Bye.
SHE GROANS
Ooh! Everything all right?
If I strangled a builder, do you
think Humphrey would arrest me
- or let me go?
- Ooh
Well, I'm sure you could
convince him to let you off.
Good to know.
So how'd it go with your mum?
How did she take the travel news?
Weirdly well.
Suspiciously calm.
Calm's good, isn't it?
You'd think, but
Mum's got layers.
You never really know
what she's thinking.
Even worse since the whole Archie thing.
Her Her head's all over the place.
Well, we're going out
for a drink tonight,
so I'm sure she'll tell me
how she feels about it.
She could use a good night out.
- Be good for her to have a proper laugh.
- Couldn't we all?
- How can I help you?
- Two cappuccinos, please.
Thanks.
Er Coastguard just confirmed.
- Only Jeff's boat was near Tideline.
- Mm-hm.
So he was the only one
out there by the seaweed farm.
Apart from the mermaid.
Right. And a unicorn did my taxes.
Very well. Let us set
mythical sea creatures aside.
Where's our motive
for damaging those lines?
That's a lot of fishing grounds to
lose if the expansion goes ahead.
So that would suggest it has to be
someone from the fishing community.
Mm. Um, Margo, anything back
from the lab about our letter?
Oh, just a moment
I believe no fingerprints were found.
Er, just the exclusion prints that were
taken, which were Diana Cooper’s.
Mm-hm.
Paper was pretty standard.
Same with the ink.
Anyone with a home computer
could have done it.
You were listening
to my phone conversation!
I thought you were here to observe.
Jeff Simmons could have
dropped off the letter
last night before he went out
on his boat.
Well, y-y-yes, but, then,
why draw attention to yourself?
I - I checked through his finances.
Looks like he's applying for
more Defra fishing subsidies.
There. So he's got financial problems.
Diana Cooper's expansion
threatens his patch.
And why the mermaid story?
A misdirection.
It had to be him.
His was the only boat in the area.
He may have been in the vicinity,
but it doesn't mean he's
responsible for that damage.
What did you say it was called again?
Ah. Now, that
is bioluminescence, or sea sparkle.
It's a chemical reaction.
RULER TAPS
Any movement
WATER SLOSHES
SOFTLY: Whoa!
sets it off like a flare.
Now, it must have been
close to the seaweed farm,
because he says the mermaid
appeared and vanished in it.
Fishing folk around here are obsessed
with the Mermaid of Shipton Abbott.
Yeah, what is that story, exactly?
Well
the story goes that the mermaid
once fell in love with a local fisherman
until she saw that he was taking too much
from her seas. So
she conjured a storm
THUNDER RUMBLES
and told him she'd help him
back to the shore,
but actually lured him onto the rocks.
RAIN BATTERS
His boat was ripped to shreds,
and there he met his end.
Some swear she's real.
A spirit of the deep.
Revenge with a tail. But
The warning is implicit -
disrespect the sea
and face the consequences.
- Yes, very interesting, Anne.
- Tch!
Are we done?
Now, Diana mentioned public opposition,
but no names.
KELBY: Er, sir, looks like word's
spread beyond the fish market.
MermaidsRevengeis trending online.
"Mermaid's revenge."
We should find out where that originated.
There's something about this whole thing
that doesn't quite ring true.
If you're looking at opposition,
try Dr Mary Rhodes.
She's a marine conservationist.
She writes to the council every week
about the seaweed farms. She's tireless.
Slightly exhausting.
Someone who is against the
expansion and an avid letter-writer.
Very interesting, Anne.
HE EXHALES
Let's see what she has to say.
Good morning.
Oh.
If you want to talk, you can be of help.
Two hands, one picker each.
Maud, can you sort these people, please?
OK.
Thank you.
Oh, sorry. Oh
MAUD LAUGHS
Use your wrist. Let it do the work.
You'll get it.
Thank you.
You been doing this long?
Ever since my husband died last year.
Sid loved the sea.
We scattered his ashes
out near Shipton Abbott Island.
I don't get out much.
Mary and my lovely granddaughter, Lacy,
they thought this might be good for me.
Mary and I go back
to the picket lines in '84.
Oh.
MAUD CHUCKLES
Her bark's worse than her bite,
though not by much.
HE LAUGHS
Thank you.
MARY: Tidelines talks green,
but it's industrial farming.
I mean, 9,000 buoys,
lights on all night.
Their biggest mistake
was shutting out the community.
If they hadn't done that,
we might have been able to help.
Need to stop for a bit. Sorry.
I have asthma.
Had it since I was a kid.
Not at all.
Diana
was sent this note last night.
- That's pretty threatening.
- Yeah. Pretty unequivocal.
We gather you like to write a letter?
Yes, I do.
But I prefer the handwritten touch.
Anyway, I wasn't in
Shipton Abbott last night.
Where were you?
At Hawk's Hut, up on the Newson Rock.
Couple of miles down the coast.
Some eccentric built it.
Said he saw mermaids from up there.
HE LAUGHS
Maud's husband bought it years ago
She lets me use it. It's great.
Great place for monitoring the seals.
Anyone with you?
No. Just me, a flask and
no phone signal. Bliss.
Ever seen one of these?
No. It's not local, though.
Could be tropical.
Maud's husband was a shell collector.
Why don't we ask her?
Maud?
Have a look at this.
Do you know what that is?
It was found tangled in the nets that
were used to sabotage the seaweed farm.
No idea.
It's curious, isn't it?
Tropical shell
caught in Devon fishing nets.
Perhaps it drifted in on a current,
dropped off a passing boat.
Oh, look.
Old, washed-up netting.
Just like what was used in the sabotage.
Mm.
So our environmental warrior,
she clearly has a motive,
access to materials, and no alibi.
Supposedly alone in a hut
famous for mermaid sightings.
But how did she get out there?
You know, this whole
mermaid legend thing
feels like someone's using
it to put us off the scent.
- Kelby?
- Sir?
Can you request Dr Rhodes' council letters
and compare them to Diana's, please?
On it, sir. Also, we've traced
that mermaid revenge hashtag.
Started with a group
called Stop Stealing Our Seas.
Er, last month, they staged
a paddle-out protest
led by local surfer Elijah Moore.
Right. Good to know.
Thank you, Kelby.
PHONE RINGS
MARGO MUTTERS Oh!
Shipton Abbott Police. Anne speaking.
How can I help?
Oh, yes, just a moment.
- It's for you.
- Mm.
Hm!
Hello, Jan.
Anything I can help with?
There is, actually, Anne.
Er, the Inspector wants to check
our letter with some from Dr Rhodes.
Could you get us some from the council?
Absolutely. I'll give it a try.
Well, just go back.
ANNE EXHALES
Won't take you two minutes.
Oh, come on
Hello. It's Councillor Lloyd here.
Yes. Um, could you put me through
- See you.
- to council complaints?
MARGO SIGHS
It's Angela, I think.
What was Agnieszka's last name again?
- Why?
- Don't you know?
Yes. Norwid. N-O-R-W-I-D.
You doing a search?
Just seeing if she's as pretty
as you say she is.
complaint to the seaweed farms
All I'm getting
is cats in hats on skateboards.
What are you talking about?
Ah, that's cute!
A kitten in a teacup.
- You you must have typed it in wrong.
- No.
- That's weird.
- You're not kidding.
Who dresses a cat in sunglasses?
No. Jeff Simmons, the fisherman.
His bank records show he made a purchase
for custom alloys from alloyluke.com.
Well, what's wrong with that?
Have you seen his truck?
It's ancient.
So why buy flash aluminium alloys?
Unless
No. Cos that wouldn't
But maybe he did.
Good to see you.
It's all there.
Good.
See you next time.
Your Stop Stealing Our Seas paddle
board protest certainly stirred things up.
Ugh!
Good stunt, Elijah. Got people talking.
It weren't a stunt. People are angry.
They don't want Tideline Farms
wrecking this coastline.
Those are lovely.
Maori fish hooks. Keep you from
getting lost at sea.
Found them in New Zealand.
Different shops, same day.
Kind of one of those weird life things.
Your latest campaign's catchy, too.
"Mermaid's Revenge."
Fits the local folklore.
Jeff Simmons swears
he saw a mermaid last night.
ELIJAH LAUGHS
Hard to say what Jeff saw,
but if the myth fits the moment
Good campaigns ride the current.
Yeah, unless it stops being a myth.
Diana Cooper received a threat
this morning.
We don't do threats.
"Mermaid's Revenge"
sounds like a call to arms.
Could one of your followers
have taken things too far?
We're not responsible
for what random people do.
And Diana Cooper’s no saint.
She's trying to privatise
a coastline that people depend on.
Yeah, but she is a person.
Who's scared.
Where were you both last night?
Newquay.
Surf comp. Stayed at the Neptune.
Got back this morning.
Mm-hm.
I stayed in with Gran. Pizza and a film.
DISTANT VOICES
- MAUD: You know my granddaughter, Lacy?
- No.
OK, thanks.
KELBY: These fins, or?
HUMPHREY: Oh, that's it!
Yes. Print one of those off, please.
These are free diving fins.
Free diving fins.
So maybe Jeff didn't see a mermaid.
He didn't.
He saw a free diver wearing these.
In the bioluminescence,
I suppose if the two fins
were together, it could
look like a tail.
Mermaid-ish, even?
You know, I must say, the whole
visual case precis is very helpful.
Even if it was a free diver,
how do you haul weighted nets
offshore without a boat?
Well, um
Paddleboard. Surfboard.
Not with that weight. You'd flip.
If they're a free diver,
they could dive down
and pick up the stones one at a time?
Kelby, check Lacy and
Elijah's alibi, please.
- Maybe he free dives, too.
- Sir.
Yeah, but still
You see, that is not
the most puzzling question.
You see, Jeff says the mermaid
was there one moment
and gone the next. So
if it wasn't a mermaid
but a free diver posing as one,
how on earth did they vanish
in a sea that lights up every move?
Perhaps Jeff lied, blinked, or both.
Speaking of Jeff, I saw him pocketing
a fat wad of cash off of some bloke.
I followed and saw him
get into a brand-new truck.
Huh! New truck, easy cash?
I thought he was meant to be broke.
Needed extra subsidies.
- He's being paid for something.
- Yes. Agreed.
Perhaps it's time we
reel in our fisherman.
You know, Humphrey, I
I think I'll join you, if I may.
Er
I mean, being stuck round here
all day rather numbs the brain.
Yes.
RECORDER BEEPS Yeah.
Let's just drop
the mermaid story, shall we?
Who's paying you
to sabotage the seaweed lines?
No-one.
Then how'd you afford the new truck?
The Coastguard confirmed yours was
the only boat in the area.
Look, I don't care what you say.
I know what I saw.
She was there and then she weren’t.
Couldn't it have
just been a diver, Jeff
- wearing these-
- No chance.
It were real. Magic.
HUMPHREY EXHALES
She moved like she were part of the sea.
Got me thinking
maybe the sea sent her.
A warning.
Like the story says.
What were you drinking?
I maybe had a bit of rum.
Hmm.
Why do you think the mermaid
was a warning, Jeff?
You been taking a bit too much
from the sea recently, is that it?
Disrespect the sea
and face the consequences.
JEFF SIGHS
Look, I lands a few sea bass
now and then on the sly.
Who doesn’t?
Sells up north a good price.
Cash in hand. Off the books.
- Enough for a new truck?
- Yeah.
I've been stretching
the pennies a while now.
So the late-night fishing,
the new truck, the cash -
all from poaching sea bass off the books?
Mm.
I swear on me mum’s grave
I saw a mermaid.
And I never touched
that seaweed farm, neither.
- Two oat milk lattes.
- Thanks.
You still think you're
the victim, don't you?
But no-one wants this expansion.
- You should just drop it.
- Right. That's enough.
Not in here.
Are you OK?
Do you want to sit?
I'm fine.
I'll get your usual.
ANNE: So what happens now Jeff's
admitted to poaching but not to sabotage?
Well, he's still a witness to a crime.
His interview recording
needs to be transcribed
- and filed.
- Can I do anything?
Oh, it it might have to wait
until tomorrow.
Margo, perhaps Anne might be able to help
with some of our information grouping.
Oh, that sounds interesting.
Otherwise known as filing.
KELBY: What time did he arrive?
Happy to help.
From what I've seen
of your filing so far
it's in need
of some good reorganisation.
And what time did he leave?
MARGO SCOFFS, LAUGHS
So, Jeff is adamant he's not our culprit.
But if it wasn't him, then then
the free diver theory still holds.
So what about Elijah?
You know young, confident surfer.
Or Lacy. Both good with a paddle board.
It can’t be. Elijah was in Newquay.
Hotel confirmed it. Lots of witnesses.
And Maud said Lacy was at home
watching Before Heaven with her.
My nan's obsessed.
Right. So that leaves Mary.
Oh, sir, I got her council letters.
Anne helped me. Listen to this one.
"If you don't drop the expansion,"
"I will be forced
to take matters further,"
"and you may regret the consequences."
That sounds like a warning shot.
Yeah, the same tone. Similar words.
Mary’s got a record, too.
A couple of charges, some arrests.
All protest stuff.
Goes back a fair way to the '80s.
Yeah, but her asthma
she couldn't free dive.
And whoever it is,
it still begs the question
how did they get away
without lighting up the sea?
Maybe she really was a mermaid.
How is our only suspect still a mermaid?
BOTH CHUCKLE
SHE SIGHS
MARTHA: How someone can be the most
infuriating, and yet
the most amazing person
at exactly the same time
SHE LAUGHS
is a mystery.
- Can I be honest?
- Always.
I didn't get it.
When I met you both for the first time,
I couldn't see how you
- fit together.
- No?
- Mm-mm.
- Well
I suppose you're not alone in that.
Took Mum a while, too.
But now you're so loved-up and so perfect
for each other, it makes me want to vomit.
Oh, I'm sorry
we make you feel that way.
BOTH LAUGH No, don't be.
It's lovely. I'm just jealous.
- Are you?
- Nah. You know me.
One-man band, or one-woman band.
- Does? Does that still work?
- Hmm
You know, you never told me what
happened with you and Archie.
- Didn't I?
- No.
Nothing to tell.
It was a thing, then it wasn't.
- Same old, same old.
- Well, something must have happened.
Yeah, it did.
Me.
You know opening up and letting
someone in isn't as scary as it sounds?
You think?
Well, did you ever
talk to him about Zoe's dad?
Sort of.
Oh, I hate it when you do that!
Do what? Look at me like a disappointed
teacher when I've forgotten my homework.
What happened to you was terrible.
And I've no idea
how you got through it
how you picked up the pieces and
not only survived, but
brought up Zoe the way you did,
to be the most amazing person
that she is.
And I know that you loved Zoe's dad.
But it doesn't mean
you can't be in love again.
The thing is, he's still here.
He smiles at me every day
the second Zoe walks into the room.
So whoever I'm with, I end up
hating them for not being him.
Archie never stood a chance.
Well, I suppose the trick is
not hating Archie for what he's not
but finding a way
to love him for what he is.
Ooh!
THEY CHUCKLE
That went quite deep there!
Did he pay you to say that?
- Of course.
- How much?
- Thousands.
- Good.
Because it's your round.
You know, if you told Archie
any of that
he'd get it.
Mm, no, that's way too scary.
I double-dare you.
Mm, I'll think about it.
But if I do a dare,
you've got to do one, too.
Like what?
Mm, I'll think of something.
- When you get another drink.
- OK.
DISTANT LAUGHTER
MARTHA: I don't know
why I'm doing a dare!
You haven't even done yours yet.
No, you have to go first. It's the law.
- Says who?
- Me!
And I'm a Detective Sergeant.
- Mm.
- And what would Humphrey say?
Er, that his wife is so boring she won't
go skinny-dipping. MARTHA GASPS
Take that back!
- No, YOU take it back.
- I haven't got it!
BOTH LAUGH
Well
last one to get their kit off
- is a kipper.
- What?!
I don't know, it just came out.
Ready? Ready?
Ooh!
Ooh, they might think we're mermaids!
SHE LAUGHS
Woohoo!
Yah!
MARTHA LAUGHS
BOTH SHRIEK
DOOR CREAKS
HUMPHREY: Mm?
I said two two pencils,
and a pair of underpants.
MARTHA LAUGHS QUIETLY
Ah
Oh Oh!
MARTHA SHIVERS
Oh, Ma Ma Martha?
You're you're freezing.
You're freezing!
SHE LAUGHS Esther and I went for a swim!
THEY LAUGH
Not skinny-dipping, though.
That's what I used to do
- before
- You OK?
Humphrey, do you think I'm boring?
Definitely not.
Sometimes I think I am.
Not just tonight, but always.
Like I've flattened out.
Sorry.
MARTHA SNORES
KELBY: Good news.
Agnieszka is coming to visit.
MARGO: Visit?
- In person?
- Yeah.
Thought she'd lost her job.
She has.
So how did she afford the flight?
Tell me you didn't send money
to someone you've never met.
So what if I had?
- I've been digging online.
- Find anything?
No. Which is worse.
One social media account.
No photos. Just cats.
And now he's sending her money.
ESTHER GROANS
Shall I have a word?
Best leave it with me.
ANNE: Here you are.
- Morning.
- Good morning, Anne. Morning.
- Anne?
- Hmm?
Have you spoken to Martha this morning?
How did she seem to you?
She's fine. Why?
Well, she said something last night
about thinking she was boring.
Well, then, it's
it's your job to help her
realise that she's not.
- My job?
- Mm.
Right.
Yeah.
Er, sir
PHONE RINGS
there was a bit of a crowd
at the council offices this morning.
- Protests against Tideline.
- Oh, yes. The final appeal.
It should be over by now.
- And yet
- What time was this?
we are still no closer
to identifying our mermaid.
Free-diver.
Diana Cooper's missing.
Diana told staff she’d
be in early for the appeal,
but when they turned up
at nine, the office was empty.
They figured she’d already gone to the
council meeting, but she never showed.
Well, she wouldn't miss that willingly.
- It was too important.
- Yeah, well, I checked,
and the appeal was dismissed
when she didn’t show up.
Well, car's still here.
No forced entry, no struggle.
Yeah, they use key cards here.
Should show her entry and exit times.
Just waiting on the data.
Hmm. She was mid-email.
And didn't finish it.
Why leave your phone?
Either she was planning on
coming back or didn't get a chance.
Something interrupted her.
GENTLE TINKLING
What's that sound?
PHONE VIBRATES
Oh! Got the key card log.
She swiped in at 8:10, out 8:37.
So where'd she go after that?
And did she have a choice?
Sir?
Looks like she was a regular.
Maybe she stopped there this morning.
Kelby, can we get this unlocked, please?
Sir.
PHONE RINGS
- Margo.
- Sir,
we've checked her house,
friends, hospital -
nothing. No sign of Diana at all.
That looks delightful.
My fail-proof hangover remedy from java.
The raw chilli is the key.
Urgh! I think I'd be cured out of fear.
Er October 12th?
Can't. Wine festival, Torquay.
OK. Um 17th, 18th?
Er, might be seeing Nigel.
Can you shift it?
I mean, my parents are dying to meet you.
Thanks, Zoe.
I'll check.
Paradise might be wearing thin.
Oh?
Oh!
I'll be out back.
How are you feeling?
Hmm.
I'm here about Diana Cooper.
She's missing.
Missing? She was just here.
Right after I opened.
- How was she?
- Mm Stressed about her appeal.
There was something yesterday -
a nasty exchange with a surfer.
In here. Young guy, dark hair.
Mm. Sounds like Elijah.
Anything else from
this morning? Even small.
She was on her phone.
Mentioned someone.
Er Dr Rhodes?
Hounding her about the expansion.
You're sure?
Yeah. Positive. Why?
ESTHER SIGHS
Diana was dead set
on going to the appeal.
Then she vanishes right before it.
Things aren't always what they appear.
PHONE RINGS If anything more comes up,
- call the station?
- Of course.
Yep?
Yep. I'm on my way.
Where's Anne?
Margo?
- No idea.
- KELBY: Sir.
A text came in at 8:33am.
Unknown number.
"If you want the truth
about the sabotage,
"meet me at Hawk's Hut, 9am."
8:33.
8:33! She swiped out at 8:37.
So that's where she was going.
And we all know
who uses Hawk's Hut, hmm?
Dr Rhodes.
Where's Diana Cooper?
I haven't seen Diana. Why?
Why? What's going on?
She's missing.
She didn't show up for the appeal.
She received a message
from an unregistered number
asking her to meet someone here.
And here you are.
SHE CHUCKLES
You think I kidnapped her?
Harmed her?
The letters you wrote to the
council were pretty threatening.
I was simply considering action
against Tideline Farms.
You've got a record.
Yeah, but not for violence.
I'm a peaceful protester.
- So why are you here?
- I told you yesterday.
This is my base.
I was here all night, I promise you.
I have no idea where Diana is.
Mind if we check in there?
- Be my guest.
- Thank you.
GENTLE TiNKLING
That sound.
I've heard it before.
Sid made that. Maud's husband.
It's too hard for Maud and Lacy
to come up here these days.
So I keep it, as a memory of him.
Anything?
Diana's not here.
So where is she?
Jeff admitted to the poaching
but stuck to the mermaid tale.
Mary Rhodes was just in the wrong place.
Elijah and Lacy both have alibis.
What are we missing?
Maori fish hooks.
Found them in New Zealand.
- New Zealand.
- Hmm?
SOFTLY: New Zealand.
It's a paua shell,
only found in New Zealand.
Sacred to the Maori
for remembrance, grief.
This This isn't protest.
It's personal.
Driven by loss.
TYPING Look!
To keep things sustainable,
the law says that paua
can only be harvested by free-divers.
Ah!
Elijah and Lacy.
But both have alibis.
Elijah maybe -
his alibi was verified -
but Lacy told us she was
with her grandmother, Maud,
which we accepted because
we couldn't see a motive.
But if she had a motive,
then it could be a lie?
Which means Maud must also have lied.
To protect her granddaughter.
So what if Maud knew
that the shell we found
in the nets was Lacy's?
So she told us they were together.
No idea.
But it wasn't true.
Jeff is convinced that he saw a mermaid,
but what I think he actually saw
was Lacy, a free diver, avoiding him.
The bioluminescence
and a lot of rum did the rest.
But how did she get away without
being seen in bioluminescence?
Look who I found
stuck in the store cupboard!
PANTING: The door slammed.
I I couldn't open it.
Oof! Wind must have blown it shut.
That door's always been dodgy.
I tried shouting for a while,
but I I got a bit tired.
We’re so sorry, Anne.
We couldn’t hear you.
We thought you’d left and gone home.
Precisely!
We assumed that Lacy swam away somehow,
but what if she never actually left?
Lacy had swum out to the seaweed farm
to free dive for stones
to weigh the nets down.
When Jeff appeared, Lacy tried to flee
underwater but realised her movements
were lit by the bioluminescence.
So she did something
only a free-diver could -
she stayed still, held her
breath for several long minutes.
An ingenious vanishing act.
ESTHER: We thought she swam away,
but she disappeared by staying
exactly where she was.
So what if Diana did the same thing?
What if the text about
Hawk's Hut wasn't for her
it was for us?
A distraction?
The paua was for Lacy's
grandfather, remember?
He collected shells,
made wind chimes with them.
When I was by Diana's window
this morning,
I heard wind chimes, the same
as the ones at Hawk's Hut.
I couldn't quite place it before.
It was so faint.
We used to sneak into these
tunnels when we were kids.
The tunnels below the offices
are perfect hiding spots,
and not just for teenage parties.
When written threats and
sabotage failed to scare Diana off,
Lacy turned to more drastic measures.
Lacy grew up here,
before Tideline Farms took
over the old fishing warehouse.
She knew its secrets.
Like the Mermaid of Shipton Abbott,
Lacy set her musical lure.
CHIMES TINKLE
Diana took the bait, followed
the sound of wind chimes.
Beautiful. Alluring.
DOOR SLAMS
Lacy didn't want to harm her
Let me out!
BANGING ON DOOR
- just trap her
- Please, let me out!
like a fish in a net.
She sent the text,
then swiped Diana's key card
to make it look like she left.
So Lacy and Diana
both vanished by staying put.
Lacy wove us a mermaid's tale,
so we'd chase a lure while the truth
waited, hidden in the depths below.
Go!
ANNE WHIMPERS
KELBY: Letts try down here.
One that way, one that way.
- Let's go.
- There’s a door.
- Diana?
- DIANA, MUFFLED: Help!
- Do you hear that?
- DIANA: Over here!
Diana?!
SHE SOBS
I think you dropped this.
I thought it was gone for good.
Your grandfather loved the sea,
loved collecting shells.
You scattered his ashes
just past the seaweed farm
and the shell is for him.
Is that why you did all of this?
Picnics on the boat.
Grandad diving for shells.
That stretch of water was ours.
I meant to take this to
where we scattered his ashes.
I'm not against the seaweed
farms, but the expansion?
I checked the map.
We wouldn’t be able
to visit Grandad again.
And it’s not just me, it’s everyone.
- The sea is our life.
- And Diana?
I didn’t want to hurt her.
You just needed her to miss that meeting.
If she couldn't get approval
for the expansion, well
it couldn't happen.
I promised Gran that they’d
always be together at the end.
Tideline Farms would have
made that impossible.
Drink?
- Er, yeah.
- Great.
First round on me?
Er Sorry. Another time. Yeah.
Bye, sir.
- Sir?
- Er, same.
A few things to tie up here.
HUMPHREY EXHALES
DOOR CLOSES
ANNE CLEARS HER THROA
Humphrey, could I have a word?
Um, if it's about Martha, Anne,
I've had an idea. It's all in hand.
Oh, no. No. That's good.
No, it's, er
It's delicate.
OK. Can it wait, then?
I'm a bit snowed under.
It's about James Smith.
Right, well, if James Smith
has another demand of me,
I'd like a hazard warning first.
And maybe a siren.
And if this is about me hurrying
up and firing one of my team
due to an impossibly small budget,
then kindly tell him
I've tragically perished
in a freak paperwork avalanche!
I'm I'm sorry.
I had no idea.
DOOR CLOSES
I can’t wait to bring Agnieszka here.
She’ll love it. Proper English pub.
Kelby look, this is awkward,
but I've been wanting to have a
chat with you about Agnieszka.
- What about her?
- I'm
I'm just concerned
it's moving a bit fast.
Why?
There's hardly anything about her online.
Just cats.
So she likes cats.
- It's not a crime, is it?
- No, it's just
something feels off.
I've seen this kind of thing before.
What kind of thing?
Someone online says all the right things.
They find your soft spots and use them.
You think I'm easy to trick?
I mean, just a bit trusting.
Agnieszka listens.
Really listens.
She doesn’t treat me like a child.
Then stop acting like one.
There. That’s it, isn’t it?
No, no, no. Kelby, I didn't mean that.
You’ve never seen me as an equal.
Not once.
I'm just the idiot
you've got to keep an eye on.
That's not fair!
No, what’s not fair
is you deciding what’s best
for me before I even get a say!
A-At least Agnieszka believes in me.
Which is a lot more
than I can say for you.
DOOR CLOSES
Ah!
So that's what your cryptic
text was about? A swim?!
Not just a swim.
A skinny-dip!
Why?!
Because you're not boring.
- We're not boring!
- But what if people see?
Take a risk!
Isn't that the fun?
- Woo!
- Ah!
Archie?
Hi. Esther.
AMELIA: Archie?
Need a hand?
Um
Here.
MARTHA LAUGHS
OK
No plotting your revenge!
I'm just thinking
we haven't laughed enough lately.
I'm sorry.
These evaluations have got me so
- Distracted?
- ..stressed.
Yeah, that too.
You're always
HUMPHREY SIGHS
holding everything together,
and you make it look so easy.
I just don't want
to lose sight of you.
Of us. The real us.
BOTH GIGGLE
You love an adventure.
I mean, I
DOG BARKS
Oh, no.
Oi!
Oi! Oi!
DOG BARKS, MARTHA LAUGHS
Oh, quick!
Oi! Oi!
Come back! No, no!
Come back here!
Come on. Good boy!
Do you want a biscuit?!
Biscuit!
A man was drugged, painted green,
covered in ivy.
- Much like your Green Man.
- It wasn't anyone from here.
Got a present for you.
It's an eviction notice.
He wants to build 30 houses here.
Are you suggesting Mr Outram
assaulted his own worker?
- He's capable of that.
- You seem to know a lot about him.
My brother.
They've assaulted my groundsman,
and now this!
How long before they kill someone?!
- You came to the house the other night.
- I'm sorry,
I I didn't realise you
had someone there.
Agnieszka's supposed
to be flying in today.
I know what you're thinking.
That she's catfishing you
out of your savings.
You understand that tomorrow is the
absolute deadline,
I must have your decision.
Sub extracted from file & improved
Her cheeks were red
Her eyes were brown ♪
Her hair in ringlets hanging down ♪
She'd a lovely face
without a frown ♪
just as the tide was flowing. ♪
HE GRUNTS
Ah!
HE PANTS
I gotcha.
MARTHA: Have you done it?
Oh, ye of little fai
WATER HISSES, HE SPLUTTERS
HE COUGHS
HE PANTS
HE CLEARS THROA
WATER HISSES, MARTHA SHRIEKS
Oh, sorry! Sorry!
Oh, gosh! Sorry.
You didn't turn the
SHRIEKS: stopcock off!
Oh! Oh!
MARTHA SHRIEKS
All right, all right! Got it.
Ah!
HE EXHALES
BOTH LAUGH
MARTHA SHRIEKS
God!
Oh, yeah. Stopcock.
That's a good idea.
- We need to call a plumber.
- Well, er
MARTHA SHRIEKS
I'll call one now.
- Humphrey.
- Yeah?
In the past hour, you've stapled
yourself to a cupboard,
fitted a letterbox upside down,
and now flooded the kitchen.
I'm sensing your mind is elsewhere.
Sorry.
Oh, don't be sorry.
Just talk to me.
I've got your mum shadowing
me at the station
as part of her induction
into the police panel.
But, worse, I've got Mr Smith pressing
for who I'm going to lose,
and I haven't even told anyone
they're under review.
When do you have to make your decision?
End of the week.
SHE EXHALES
Maybe honesty is the best policy.
Just tell them what's going on.
It's an impossible situation.
They'll understand.
HE EXHALES
HE SNORES LIGHTLY
Big night, was it?
No. Looks like it.
If you must know, I was
chatting with Agnieszka.
Oh!
She's here now, then?
Online.
She was a bit upset. She lost her job.
Don't tell me any more.
Can guess the rest.
- Morning, sir.
- Morning.
Y-Yes. Er, morning.
Talking of imaginary women,
the fish market was buzzing this morning.
Someone spotted
the Mermaid of Shipton Abbott
- last night.
- Oh. Where?
Jeff Simmons swears he saw her
out by Tideline Seaweed Farms.
Oh, I'd love to see a mermaid.
Just because people believe it,
doesn't make it true.
- Ooh!
- Huh?
Er, what do you think, sir?
- Sir?
- Hmm?
Someone's seen a mermaid.
This is usually where you start getting
carried away by a bit of local nonsense.
Yeah.
Is everything all right?
You seem a bit stressed.
Oh no. Er
I've I've got
I've got some, er
Well, I've got something to tell you all.
DOOR CLOSES Um
SHE EXHALES Yes.
Er, Anne will be joining us today
Morning, team!
as part of her role
in the police committee.
ANNE: Now, don't worry.
I want you all to carry on
exactly as you would if I wasn't here.
And the more I know about what you
actually do, the more I can support it.
I'll need a desk.
Oh, we've got a spare one here.
Thank you, Kelby.
Thank you. That's very helpful.
Yes. Thank you, Kelby.
You won't even notice I'm here.
PHONE RINGS
Might explain the DI's stress.
So what's on the agenda for today?
Tideline Farms.
Someone's sabotaged their seaweed lines.
That's where they saw the mermaid.
- MARGO: They're on their way.
- Excellent. Um Yes, Anne.
Margo will show you the ropes while we,
er we three, will, er
go and see what happened.
Oh.
SHE CHUCKLES
ESTHER: Kelby's questioning the staff,
but before we start this investigation,
can we agree that
the Mermaid of Shipton Abbott
didn't sabotage Tideline Farms?
HUMPREY CHUCKLES
Our job is to keep
an open mind, Sergeant.
It's all just old fishermen's tales.
Silly superstition
to wind the grockles up.
Talking of Tideline,
this is where they started.
The council was given a grant
to restore these old workshops,
then rent them out at a reasonable
rate to help new business.
Tideline's took off within
the first couple of years,
so moved to bigger premises.
HUMPHREY EXHALES
Sabotaging a seaweed farm
seems a bit extreme, don't you think?
I mean, it's hardly controversial.
Depends who you ask.
How so?
Some reckon it's saving the planet.
Soaks carbon,
replaces plastic, feeds cows.
Others say it ruins the
view, kills fishing and tourism.
And Tideline?
Want to expand, grow the
business, create more jobs.
Applied for it twice before.
Both times blocked.
Locals weren't having it.
How big are we talking?
270 acres.
HE WHISTLES
Off-limits to fishermen, paddle
boards, swimmers, the lot.
That's about, what, 200 football pitches?
No wonder the locals aren't happy.
We used to sneak into these
tunnels when we were kids.
Bit of music, couple of ciders.
No-one knew we were here.
Is this a confession
to breaking and entering?
HUMPHREY CHUCKLES
They run underneath this entire building.
WOMAN: These nets were found
this morning, weighed down with stones
to pull the seaweed out of the sunlight.
If they'd succeeded,
we'd be facing a failed harvest.
That's not all. I got this.
"Stop your expansion plans
or face the consequences."
It was shoved through our office door.
I found it this morning.
Any CCTV? Private security?
No. Regretting that now.
We've got a final appeal hearing
about the expansion tomorrow. 10am.
With Marine Management and the council.
I can't believe someone hates
what we're doing this much.
I put everything into this business.
Word is, we might finally get approved.
Someone clearly doesn't want that.
Yes. Or some thing.
Do you know of anyone in particular
who's against the planned expansion?
Honestly? Half the town.
I'm scared.
This isn't grumbling
in some parish newsletter.
Thi This is malicious.
It feels like there's
a target on my back.
PHONE BUZZES
Oh.
I'm really sorry, I'm late for a meeting.
Will you let me know what you find?
- OK.
- Yeah.
Kelby, can we get this
sent to the lab, please?
Prints, if we're lucky.
- Sir.
- Find anything?
The Tideline crew
found the nets at 5:30am.
Last clear check was 6pm yesterday,
so sabotage happened overnight.
All right.
Well, now
what's this?
Not seen one like this before.
Let me guess.
You collected shells
- I collected shells at school.
- at school. Bet you were popular.
She was moving fast below the surface.
Saw her long tail, flashing
electric blue in the sea sparkle.
Could only be one thing. A mermaid.
How close?
Right below me.
Popped up again well past the lines.
Tail arcs, down she goes again.
Blink
then gone. Just like that.
- It's extraordinary.
- Aye.
Magic, it were.
I know what folks say.
"Jeff be proper mazed."
But I know what I saw.
What were you doing out so late?
Night fishing. Not so odd.
Tide was right.
Sleeping all right?
On any meds? Mixing
anything home-brewed?
HE SCOFFS
- Did you see any other boat?
- Nah.
Just me
and her.
The Mermaid of Shipton Abbott.
You tell me what else can swim
through sea sparkle and then just vanish.
You ever pull one of these up
in your nets?
Can't say I have.
Odd - looking thing, innit?
Mind if I borrow one?
I don't care. Help yourself.
Super.
You know, mermaids have
been spotted throughout history
as long as humans have sailed.
On ships sailed by a load of
lonely men drinking cheap rum,
which pretty much describes
Jeff Simmons, too.
HE CHUCKLES
Only 5% of the ocean's
explored, Sergeant.
Who's to know what's out there?
The sea hides all manner
of strange things.
AUTOMATED MESSAGE: Please leave
your message after the tone. TONE
MARTHA: Hello. Me again. Could you
call me back as soon as possible, please?
Thanks. Bye.
SHE GROANS
Ooh! Everything all right?
If I strangled a builder, do you
think Humphrey would arrest me
- or let me go?
- Ooh
Well, I'm sure you could
convince him to let you off.
Good to know.
So how'd it go with your mum?
How did she take the travel news?
Weirdly well.
Suspiciously calm.
Calm's good, isn't it?
You'd think, but
Mum's got layers.
You never really know
what she's thinking.
Even worse since the whole Archie thing.
Her Her head's all over the place.
Well, we're going out
for a drink tonight,
so I'm sure she'll tell me
how she feels about it.
She could use a good night out.
- Be good for her to have a proper laugh.
- Couldn't we all?
- How can I help you?
- Two cappuccinos, please.
Thanks.
Er Coastguard just confirmed.
- Only Jeff's boat was near Tideline.
- Mm-hm.
So he was the only one
out there by the seaweed farm.
Apart from the mermaid.
Right. And a unicorn did my taxes.
Very well. Let us set
mythical sea creatures aside.
Where's our motive
for damaging those lines?
That's a lot of fishing grounds to
lose if the expansion goes ahead.
So that would suggest it has to be
someone from the fishing community.
Mm. Um, Margo, anything back
from the lab about our letter?
Oh, just a moment
I believe no fingerprints were found.
Er, just the exclusion prints that were
taken, which were Diana Cooper’s.
Mm-hm.
Paper was pretty standard.
Same with the ink.
Anyone with a home computer
could have done it.
You were listening
to my phone conversation!
I thought you were here to observe.
Jeff Simmons could have
dropped off the letter
last night before he went out
on his boat.
Well, y-y-yes, but, then,
why draw attention to yourself?
I - I checked through his finances.
Looks like he's applying for
more Defra fishing subsidies.
There. So he's got financial problems.
Diana Cooper's expansion
threatens his patch.
And why the mermaid story?
A misdirection.
It had to be him.
His was the only boat in the area.
He may have been in the vicinity,
but it doesn't mean he's
responsible for that damage.
What did you say it was called again?
Ah. Now, that
is bioluminescence, or sea sparkle.
It's a chemical reaction.
RULER TAPS
Any movement
WATER SLOSHES
SOFTLY: Whoa!
sets it off like a flare.
Now, it must have been
close to the seaweed farm,
because he says the mermaid
appeared and vanished in it.
Fishing folk around here are obsessed
with the Mermaid of Shipton Abbott.
Yeah, what is that story, exactly?
Well
the story goes that the mermaid
once fell in love with a local fisherman
until she saw that he was taking too much
from her seas. So
she conjured a storm
THUNDER RUMBLES
and told him she'd help him
back to the shore,
but actually lured him onto the rocks.
RAIN BATTERS
His boat was ripped to shreds,
and there he met his end.
Some swear she's real.
A spirit of the deep.
Revenge with a tail. But
The warning is implicit -
disrespect the sea
and face the consequences.
- Yes, very interesting, Anne.
- Tch!
Are we done?
Now, Diana mentioned public opposition,
but no names.
KELBY: Er, sir, looks like word's
spread beyond the fish market.
MermaidsRevengeis trending online.
"Mermaid's revenge."
We should find out where that originated.
There's something about this whole thing
that doesn't quite ring true.
If you're looking at opposition,
try Dr Mary Rhodes.
She's a marine conservationist.
She writes to the council every week
about the seaweed farms. She's tireless.
Slightly exhausting.
Someone who is against the
expansion and an avid letter-writer.
Very interesting, Anne.
HE EXHALES
Let's see what she has to say.
Good morning.
Oh.
If you want to talk, you can be of help.
Two hands, one picker each.
Maud, can you sort these people, please?
OK.
Thank you.
Oh, sorry. Oh
MAUD LAUGHS
Use your wrist. Let it do the work.
You'll get it.
Thank you.
You been doing this long?
Ever since my husband died last year.
Sid loved the sea.
We scattered his ashes
out near Shipton Abbott Island.
I don't get out much.
Mary and my lovely granddaughter, Lacy,
they thought this might be good for me.
Mary and I go back
to the picket lines in '84.
Oh.
MAUD CHUCKLES
Her bark's worse than her bite,
though not by much.
HE LAUGHS
Thank you.
MARY: Tidelines talks green,
but it's industrial farming.
I mean, 9,000 buoys,
lights on all night.
Their biggest mistake
was shutting out the community.
If they hadn't done that,
we might have been able to help.
Need to stop for a bit. Sorry.
I have asthma.
Had it since I was a kid.
Not at all.
Diana
was sent this note last night.
- That's pretty threatening.
- Yeah. Pretty unequivocal.
We gather you like to write a letter?
Yes, I do.
But I prefer the handwritten touch.
Anyway, I wasn't in
Shipton Abbott last night.
Where were you?
At Hawk's Hut, up on the Newson Rock.
Couple of miles down the coast.
Some eccentric built it.
Said he saw mermaids from up there.
HE LAUGHS
Maud's husband bought it years ago
She lets me use it. It's great.
Great place for monitoring the seals.
Anyone with you?
No. Just me, a flask and
no phone signal. Bliss.
Ever seen one of these?
No. It's not local, though.
Could be tropical.
Maud's husband was a shell collector.
Why don't we ask her?
Maud?
Have a look at this.
Do you know what that is?
It was found tangled in the nets that
were used to sabotage the seaweed farm.
No idea.
It's curious, isn't it?
Tropical shell
caught in Devon fishing nets.
Perhaps it drifted in on a current,
dropped off a passing boat.
Oh, look.
Old, washed-up netting.
Just like what was used in the sabotage.
Mm.
So our environmental warrior,
she clearly has a motive,
access to materials, and no alibi.
Supposedly alone in a hut
famous for mermaid sightings.
But how did she get out there?
You know, this whole
mermaid legend thing
feels like someone's using
it to put us off the scent.
- Kelby?
- Sir?
Can you request Dr Rhodes' council letters
and compare them to Diana's, please?
On it, sir. Also, we've traced
that mermaid revenge hashtag.
Started with a group
called Stop Stealing Our Seas.
Er, last month, they staged
a paddle-out protest
led by local surfer Elijah Moore.
Right. Good to know.
Thank you, Kelby.
PHONE RINGS
MARGO MUTTERS Oh!
Shipton Abbott Police. Anne speaking.
How can I help?
Oh, yes, just a moment.
- It's for you.
- Mm.
Hm!
Hello, Jan.
Anything I can help with?
There is, actually, Anne.
Er, the Inspector wants to check
our letter with some from Dr Rhodes.
Could you get us some from the council?
Absolutely. I'll give it a try.
Well, just go back.
ANNE EXHALES
Won't take you two minutes.
Oh, come on
Hello. It's Councillor Lloyd here.
Yes. Um, could you put me through
- See you.
- to council complaints?
MARGO SIGHS
It's Angela, I think.
What was Agnieszka's last name again?
- Why?
- Don't you know?
Yes. Norwid. N-O-R-W-I-D.
You doing a search?
Just seeing if she's as pretty
as you say she is.
complaint to the seaweed farms
All I'm getting
is cats in hats on skateboards.
What are you talking about?
Ah, that's cute!
A kitten in a teacup.
- You you must have typed it in wrong.
- No.
- That's weird.
- You're not kidding.
Who dresses a cat in sunglasses?
No. Jeff Simmons, the fisherman.
His bank records show he made a purchase
for custom alloys from alloyluke.com.
Well, what's wrong with that?
Have you seen his truck?
It's ancient.
So why buy flash aluminium alloys?
Unless
No. Cos that wouldn't
But maybe he did.
Good to see you.
It's all there.
Good.
See you next time.
Your Stop Stealing Our Seas paddle
board protest certainly stirred things up.
Ugh!
Good stunt, Elijah. Got people talking.
It weren't a stunt. People are angry.
They don't want Tideline Farms
wrecking this coastline.
Those are lovely.
Maori fish hooks. Keep you from
getting lost at sea.
Found them in New Zealand.
Different shops, same day.
Kind of one of those weird life things.
Your latest campaign's catchy, too.
"Mermaid's Revenge."
Fits the local folklore.
Jeff Simmons swears
he saw a mermaid last night.
ELIJAH LAUGHS
Hard to say what Jeff saw,
but if the myth fits the moment
Good campaigns ride the current.
Yeah, unless it stops being a myth.
Diana Cooper received a threat
this morning.
We don't do threats.
"Mermaid's Revenge"
sounds like a call to arms.
Could one of your followers
have taken things too far?
We're not responsible
for what random people do.
And Diana Cooper’s no saint.
She's trying to privatise
a coastline that people depend on.
Yeah, but she is a person.
Who's scared.
Where were you both last night?
Newquay.
Surf comp. Stayed at the Neptune.
Got back this morning.
Mm-hm.
I stayed in with Gran. Pizza and a film.
DISTANT VOICES
- MAUD: You know my granddaughter, Lacy?
- No.
OK, thanks.
KELBY: These fins, or?
HUMPHREY: Oh, that's it!
Yes. Print one of those off, please.
These are free diving fins.
Free diving fins.
So maybe Jeff didn't see a mermaid.
He didn't.
He saw a free diver wearing these.
In the bioluminescence,
I suppose if the two fins
were together, it could
look like a tail.
Mermaid-ish, even?
You know, I must say, the whole
visual case precis is very helpful.
Even if it was a free diver,
how do you haul weighted nets
offshore without a boat?
Well, um
Paddleboard. Surfboard.
Not with that weight. You'd flip.
If they're a free diver,
they could dive down
and pick up the stones one at a time?
Kelby, check Lacy and
Elijah's alibi, please.
- Maybe he free dives, too.
- Sir.
Yeah, but still
You see, that is not
the most puzzling question.
You see, Jeff says the mermaid
was there one moment
and gone the next. So
if it wasn't a mermaid
but a free diver posing as one,
how on earth did they vanish
in a sea that lights up every move?
Perhaps Jeff lied, blinked, or both.
Speaking of Jeff, I saw him pocketing
a fat wad of cash off of some bloke.
I followed and saw him
get into a brand-new truck.
Huh! New truck, easy cash?
I thought he was meant to be broke.
Needed extra subsidies.
- He's being paid for something.
- Yes. Agreed.
Perhaps it's time we
reel in our fisherman.
You know, Humphrey, I
I think I'll join you, if I may.
Er
I mean, being stuck round here
all day rather numbs the brain.
Yes.
RECORDER BEEPS Yeah.
Let's just drop
the mermaid story, shall we?
Who's paying you
to sabotage the seaweed lines?
No-one.
Then how'd you afford the new truck?
The Coastguard confirmed yours was
the only boat in the area.
Look, I don't care what you say.
I know what I saw.
She was there and then she weren’t.
Couldn't it have
just been a diver, Jeff
- wearing these-
- No chance.
It were real. Magic.
HUMPHREY EXHALES
She moved like she were part of the sea.
Got me thinking
maybe the sea sent her.
A warning.
Like the story says.
What were you drinking?
I maybe had a bit of rum.
Hmm.
Why do you think the mermaid
was a warning, Jeff?
You been taking a bit too much
from the sea recently, is that it?
Disrespect the sea
and face the consequences.
JEFF SIGHS
Look, I lands a few sea bass
now and then on the sly.
Who doesn’t?
Sells up north a good price.
Cash in hand. Off the books.
- Enough for a new truck?
- Yeah.
I've been stretching
the pennies a while now.
So the late-night fishing,
the new truck, the cash -
all from poaching sea bass off the books?
Mm.
I swear on me mum’s grave
I saw a mermaid.
And I never touched
that seaweed farm, neither.
- Two oat milk lattes.
- Thanks.
You still think you're
the victim, don't you?
But no-one wants this expansion.
- You should just drop it.
- Right. That's enough.
Not in here.
Are you OK?
Do you want to sit?
I'm fine.
I'll get your usual.
ANNE: So what happens now Jeff's
admitted to poaching but not to sabotage?
Well, he's still a witness to a crime.
His interview recording
needs to be transcribed
- and filed.
- Can I do anything?
Oh, it it might have to wait
until tomorrow.
Margo, perhaps Anne might be able to help
with some of our information grouping.
Oh, that sounds interesting.
Otherwise known as filing.
KELBY: What time did he arrive?
Happy to help.
From what I've seen
of your filing so far
it's in need
of some good reorganisation.
And what time did he leave?
MARGO SCOFFS, LAUGHS
So, Jeff is adamant he's not our culprit.
But if it wasn't him, then then
the free diver theory still holds.
So what about Elijah?
You know young, confident surfer.
Or Lacy. Both good with a paddle board.
It can’t be. Elijah was in Newquay.
Hotel confirmed it. Lots of witnesses.
And Maud said Lacy was at home
watching Before Heaven with her.
My nan's obsessed.
Right. So that leaves Mary.
Oh, sir, I got her council letters.
Anne helped me. Listen to this one.
"If you don't drop the expansion,"
"I will be forced
to take matters further,"
"and you may regret the consequences."
That sounds like a warning shot.
Yeah, the same tone. Similar words.
Mary’s got a record, too.
A couple of charges, some arrests.
All protest stuff.
Goes back a fair way to the '80s.
Yeah, but her asthma
she couldn't free dive.
And whoever it is,
it still begs the question
how did they get away
without lighting up the sea?
Maybe she really was a mermaid.
How is our only suspect still a mermaid?
BOTH CHUCKLE
SHE SIGHS
MARTHA: How someone can be the most
infuriating, and yet
the most amazing person
at exactly the same time
SHE LAUGHS
is a mystery.
- Can I be honest?
- Always.
I didn't get it.
When I met you both for the first time,
I couldn't see how you
- fit together.
- No?
- Mm-mm.
- Well
I suppose you're not alone in that.
Took Mum a while, too.
But now you're so loved-up and so perfect
for each other, it makes me want to vomit.
Oh, I'm sorry
we make you feel that way.
BOTH LAUGH No, don't be.
It's lovely. I'm just jealous.
- Are you?
- Nah. You know me.
One-man band, or one-woman band.
- Does? Does that still work?
- Hmm
You know, you never told me what
happened with you and Archie.
- Didn't I?
- No.
Nothing to tell.
It was a thing, then it wasn't.
- Same old, same old.
- Well, something must have happened.
Yeah, it did.
Me.
You know opening up and letting
someone in isn't as scary as it sounds?
You think?
Well, did you ever
talk to him about Zoe's dad?
Sort of.
Oh, I hate it when you do that!
Do what? Look at me like a disappointed
teacher when I've forgotten my homework.
What happened to you was terrible.
And I've no idea
how you got through it
how you picked up the pieces and
not only survived, but
brought up Zoe the way you did,
to be the most amazing person
that she is.
And I know that you loved Zoe's dad.
But it doesn't mean
you can't be in love again.
The thing is, he's still here.
He smiles at me every day
the second Zoe walks into the room.
So whoever I'm with, I end up
hating them for not being him.
Archie never stood a chance.
Well, I suppose the trick is
not hating Archie for what he's not
but finding a way
to love him for what he is.
Ooh!
THEY CHUCKLE
That went quite deep there!
Did he pay you to say that?
- Of course.
- How much?
- Thousands.
- Good.
Because it's your round.
You know, if you told Archie
any of that
he'd get it.
Mm, no, that's way too scary.
I double-dare you.
Mm, I'll think about it.
But if I do a dare,
you've got to do one, too.
Like what?
Mm, I'll think of something.
- When you get another drink.
- OK.
DISTANT LAUGHTER
MARTHA: I don't know
why I'm doing a dare!
You haven't even done yours yet.
No, you have to go first. It's the law.
- Says who?
- Me!
And I'm a Detective Sergeant.
- Mm.
- And what would Humphrey say?
Er, that his wife is so boring she won't
go skinny-dipping. MARTHA GASPS
Take that back!
- No, YOU take it back.
- I haven't got it!
BOTH LAUGH
Well
last one to get their kit off
- is a kipper.
- What?!
I don't know, it just came out.
Ready? Ready?
Ooh!
Ooh, they might think we're mermaids!
SHE LAUGHS
Woohoo!
Yah!
MARTHA LAUGHS
BOTH SHRIEK
DOOR CREAKS
HUMPHREY: Mm?
I said two two pencils,
and a pair of underpants.
MARTHA LAUGHS QUIETLY
Ah
Oh Oh!
MARTHA SHIVERS
Oh, Ma Ma Martha?
You're you're freezing.
You're freezing!
SHE LAUGHS Esther and I went for a swim!
THEY LAUGH
Not skinny-dipping, though.
That's what I used to do
- before
- You OK?
Humphrey, do you think I'm boring?
Definitely not.
Sometimes I think I am.
Not just tonight, but always.
Like I've flattened out.
Sorry.
MARTHA SNORES
KELBY: Good news.
Agnieszka is coming to visit.
MARGO: Visit?
- In person?
- Yeah.
Thought she'd lost her job.
She has.
So how did she afford the flight?
Tell me you didn't send money
to someone you've never met.
So what if I had?
- I've been digging online.
- Find anything?
No. Which is worse.
One social media account.
No photos. Just cats.
And now he's sending her money.
ESTHER GROANS
Shall I have a word?
Best leave it with me.
ANNE: Here you are.
- Morning.
- Good morning, Anne. Morning.
- Anne?
- Hmm?
Have you spoken to Martha this morning?
How did she seem to you?
She's fine. Why?
Well, she said something last night
about thinking she was boring.
Well, then, it's
it's your job to help her
realise that she's not.
- My job?
- Mm.
Right.
Yeah.
Er, sir
PHONE RINGS
there was a bit of a crowd
at the council offices this morning.
- Protests against Tideline.
- Oh, yes. The final appeal.
It should be over by now.
- And yet
- What time was this?
we are still no closer
to identifying our mermaid.
Free-diver.
Diana Cooper's missing.
Diana told staff she’d
be in early for the appeal,
but when they turned up
at nine, the office was empty.
They figured she’d already gone to the
council meeting, but she never showed.
Well, she wouldn't miss that willingly.
- It was too important.
- Yeah, well, I checked,
and the appeal was dismissed
when she didn’t show up.
Well, car's still here.
No forced entry, no struggle.
Yeah, they use key cards here.
Should show her entry and exit times.
Just waiting on the data.
Hmm. She was mid-email.
And didn't finish it.
Why leave your phone?
Either she was planning on
coming back or didn't get a chance.
Something interrupted her.
GENTLE TINKLING
What's that sound?
PHONE VIBRATES
Oh! Got the key card log.
She swiped in at 8:10, out 8:37.
So where'd she go after that?
And did she have a choice?
Sir?
Looks like she was a regular.
Maybe she stopped there this morning.
Kelby, can we get this unlocked, please?
Sir.
PHONE RINGS
- Margo.
- Sir,
we've checked her house,
friends, hospital -
nothing. No sign of Diana at all.
That looks delightful.
My fail-proof hangover remedy from java.
The raw chilli is the key.
Urgh! I think I'd be cured out of fear.
Er October 12th?
Can't. Wine festival, Torquay.
OK. Um 17th, 18th?
Er, might be seeing Nigel.
Can you shift it?
I mean, my parents are dying to meet you.
Thanks, Zoe.
I'll check.
Paradise might be wearing thin.
Oh?
Oh!
I'll be out back.
How are you feeling?
Hmm.
I'm here about Diana Cooper.
She's missing.
Missing? She was just here.
Right after I opened.
- How was she?
- Mm Stressed about her appeal.
There was something yesterday -
a nasty exchange with a surfer.
In here. Young guy, dark hair.
Mm. Sounds like Elijah.
Anything else from
this morning? Even small.
She was on her phone.
Mentioned someone.
Er Dr Rhodes?
Hounding her about the expansion.
You're sure?
Yeah. Positive. Why?
ESTHER SIGHS
Diana was dead set
on going to the appeal.
Then she vanishes right before it.
Things aren't always what they appear.
PHONE RINGS If anything more comes up,
- call the station?
- Of course.
Yep?
Yep. I'm on my way.
Where's Anne?
Margo?
- No idea.
- KELBY: Sir.
A text came in at 8:33am.
Unknown number.
"If you want the truth
about the sabotage,
"meet me at Hawk's Hut, 9am."
8:33.
8:33! She swiped out at 8:37.
So that's where she was going.
And we all know
who uses Hawk's Hut, hmm?
Dr Rhodes.
Where's Diana Cooper?
I haven't seen Diana. Why?
Why? What's going on?
She's missing.
She didn't show up for the appeal.
She received a message
from an unregistered number
asking her to meet someone here.
And here you are.
SHE CHUCKLES
You think I kidnapped her?
Harmed her?
The letters you wrote to the
council were pretty threatening.
I was simply considering action
against Tideline Farms.
You've got a record.
Yeah, but not for violence.
I'm a peaceful protester.
- So why are you here?
- I told you yesterday.
This is my base.
I was here all night, I promise you.
I have no idea where Diana is.
Mind if we check in there?
- Be my guest.
- Thank you.
GENTLE TiNKLING
That sound.
I've heard it before.
Sid made that. Maud's husband.
It's too hard for Maud and Lacy
to come up here these days.
So I keep it, as a memory of him.
Anything?
Diana's not here.
So where is she?
Jeff admitted to the poaching
but stuck to the mermaid tale.
Mary Rhodes was just in the wrong place.
Elijah and Lacy both have alibis.
What are we missing?
Maori fish hooks.
Found them in New Zealand.
- New Zealand.
- Hmm?
SOFTLY: New Zealand.
It's a paua shell,
only found in New Zealand.
Sacred to the Maori
for remembrance, grief.
This This isn't protest.
It's personal.
Driven by loss.
TYPING Look!
To keep things sustainable,
the law says that paua
can only be harvested by free-divers.
Ah!
Elijah and Lacy.
But both have alibis.
Elijah maybe -
his alibi was verified -
but Lacy told us she was
with her grandmother, Maud,
which we accepted because
we couldn't see a motive.
But if she had a motive,
then it could be a lie?
Which means Maud must also have lied.
To protect her granddaughter.
So what if Maud knew
that the shell we found
in the nets was Lacy's?
So she told us they were together.
No idea.
But it wasn't true.
Jeff is convinced that he saw a mermaid,
but what I think he actually saw
was Lacy, a free diver, avoiding him.
The bioluminescence
and a lot of rum did the rest.
But how did she get away without
being seen in bioluminescence?
Look who I found
stuck in the store cupboard!
PANTING: The door slammed.
I I couldn't open it.
Oof! Wind must have blown it shut.
That door's always been dodgy.
I tried shouting for a while,
but I I got a bit tired.
We’re so sorry, Anne.
We couldn’t hear you.
We thought you’d left and gone home.
Precisely!
We assumed that Lacy swam away somehow,
but what if she never actually left?
Lacy had swum out to the seaweed farm
to free dive for stones
to weigh the nets down.
When Jeff appeared, Lacy tried to flee
underwater but realised her movements
were lit by the bioluminescence.
So she did something
only a free-diver could -
she stayed still, held her
breath for several long minutes.
An ingenious vanishing act.
ESTHER: We thought she swam away,
but she disappeared by staying
exactly where she was.
So what if Diana did the same thing?
What if the text about
Hawk's Hut wasn't for her
it was for us?
A distraction?
The paua was for Lacy's
grandfather, remember?
He collected shells,
made wind chimes with them.
When I was by Diana's window
this morning,
I heard wind chimes, the same
as the ones at Hawk's Hut.
I couldn't quite place it before.
It was so faint.
We used to sneak into these
tunnels when we were kids.
The tunnels below the offices
are perfect hiding spots,
and not just for teenage parties.
When written threats and
sabotage failed to scare Diana off,
Lacy turned to more drastic measures.
Lacy grew up here,
before Tideline Farms took
over the old fishing warehouse.
She knew its secrets.
Like the Mermaid of Shipton Abbott,
Lacy set her musical lure.
CHIMES TINKLE
Diana took the bait, followed
the sound of wind chimes.
Beautiful. Alluring.
DOOR SLAMS
Lacy didn't want to harm her
Let me out!
BANGING ON DOOR
- just trap her
- Please, let me out!
like a fish in a net.
She sent the text,
then swiped Diana's key card
to make it look like she left.
So Lacy and Diana
both vanished by staying put.
Lacy wove us a mermaid's tale,
so we'd chase a lure while the truth
waited, hidden in the depths below.
Go!
ANNE WHIMPERS
KELBY: Letts try down here.
One that way, one that way.
- Let's go.
- There’s a door.
- Diana?
- DIANA, MUFFLED: Help!
- Do you hear that?
- DIANA: Over here!
Diana?!
SHE SOBS
I think you dropped this.
I thought it was gone for good.
Your grandfather loved the sea,
loved collecting shells.
You scattered his ashes
just past the seaweed farm
and the shell is for him.
Is that why you did all of this?
Picnics on the boat.
Grandad diving for shells.
That stretch of water was ours.
I meant to take this to
where we scattered his ashes.
I'm not against the seaweed
farms, but the expansion?
I checked the map.
We wouldn’t be able
to visit Grandad again.
And it’s not just me, it’s everyone.
- The sea is our life.
- And Diana?
I didn’t want to hurt her.
You just needed her to miss that meeting.
If she couldn't get approval
for the expansion, well
it couldn't happen.
I promised Gran that they’d
always be together at the end.
Tideline Farms would have
made that impossible.
Drink?
- Er, yeah.
- Great.
First round on me?
Er Sorry. Another time. Yeah.
Bye, sir.
- Sir?
- Er, same.
A few things to tie up here.
HUMPHREY EXHALES
DOOR CLOSES
ANNE CLEARS HER THROA
Humphrey, could I have a word?
Um, if it's about Martha, Anne,
I've had an idea. It's all in hand.
Oh, no. No. That's good.
No, it's, er
It's delicate.
OK. Can it wait, then?
I'm a bit snowed under.
It's about James Smith.
Right, well, if James Smith
has another demand of me,
I'd like a hazard warning first.
And maybe a siren.
And if this is about me hurrying
up and firing one of my team
due to an impossibly small budget,
then kindly tell him
I've tragically perished
in a freak paperwork avalanche!
I'm I'm sorry.
I had no idea.
DOOR CLOSES
I can’t wait to bring Agnieszka here.
She’ll love it. Proper English pub.
Kelby look, this is awkward,
but I've been wanting to have a
chat with you about Agnieszka.
- What about her?
- I'm
I'm just concerned
it's moving a bit fast.
Why?
There's hardly anything about her online.
Just cats.
So she likes cats.
- It's not a crime, is it?
- No, it's just
something feels off.
I've seen this kind of thing before.
What kind of thing?
Someone online says all the right things.
They find your soft spots and use them.
You think I'm easy to trick?
I mean, just a bit trusting.
Agnieszka listens.
Really listens.
She doesn’t treat me like a child.
Then stop acting like one.
There. That’s it, isn’t it?
No, no, no. Kelby, I didn't mean that.
You’ve never seen me as an equal.
Not once.
I'm just the idiot
you've got to keep an eye on.
That's not fair!
No, what’s not fair
is you deciding what’s best
for me before I even get a say!
A-At least Agnieszka believes in me.
Which is a lot more
than I can say for you.
DOOR CLOSES
Ah!
So that's what your cryptic
text was about? A swim?!
Not just a swim.
A skinny-dip!
Why?!
Because you're not boring.
- We're not boring!
- But what if people see?
Take a risk!
Isn't that the fun?
- Woo!
- Ah!
Archie?
Hi. Esther.
AMELIA: Archie?
Need a hand?
Um
Here.
MARTHA LAUGHS
OK
No plotting your revenge!
I'm just thinking
we haven't laughed enough lately.
I'm sorry.
These evaluations have got me so
- Distracted?
- ..stressed.
Yeah, that too.
You're always
HUMPHREY SIGHS
holding everything together,
and you make it look so easy.
I just don't want
to lose sight of you.
Of us. The real us.
BOTH GIGGLE
You love an adventure.
I mean, I
DOG BARKS
Oh, no.
Oi!
Oi! Oi!
DOG BARKS, MARTHA LAUGHS
Oh, quick!
Oi! Oi!
Come back! No, no!
Come back here!
Come on. Good boy!
Do you want a biscuit?!
Biscuit!
A man was drugged, painted green,
covered in ivy.
- Much like your Green Man.
- It wasn't anyone from here.
Got a present for you.
It's an eviction notice.
He wants to build 30 houses here.
Are you suggesting Mr Outram
assaulted his own worker?
- He's capable of that.
- You seem to know a lot about him.
My brother.
They've assaulted my groundsman,
and now this!
How long before they kill someone?!
- You came to the house the other night.
- I'm sorry,
I I didn't realise you
had someone there.
Agnieszka's supposed
to be flying in today.
I know what you're thinking.
That she's catfishing you
out of your savings.
You understand that tomorrow is the
absolute deadline,
I must have your decision.
Sub extracted from file & improved