Jackie Chan Adventures (2000) s04e05 Episode Script

1
Huh?
Oni!
This antique
looks valuable.
Today is my lucky day.
Not!
No!
Demon magic,
here I come.
Finn: Not!
You clowns had your shot
at being ninja masters
and you blew it.
We was doin' ok
till chan showed up.
Well, it's
Finn's turn, baby.
Those shadowkhan
are gonna be my slaves,
'cause nobody's taking
this mask from me.
Not!
Told ya.
Ohh
I hate fish.
Jackie: Tohru!
Go, go, go!
Finn, chow,
and ratso: Not!
Heh heh heh.
Look what
washed up on deck.
Jade! What are
you doing here?
Heh. It looks like
I'm catch of the day.
Give me back
my mask, chan
Or it's anchors aweigh
for your niece.
So, what's it
gonna be, chan
The kid or the mask?
Unh!
All: Aah!
(Panting)
Come here, you!
Hunh! Hah!
Hyah!
Unh! Unh!
Here!
Yee-ha!
Unh!
Huh?
I
Hate
Fish.
Tohru, gun it!
Ahoy, maties!
Oh, man.
Tarakudo's gonna
have our heads.
That could be arranged.
(All gasp)
Jade: Uncle, we're back!
Jackie: And this time,
the mask did not wind up
on anyone's face.
We rule!
Ohh
I will "rule"
after a nice hot bath.
Ow!
No time for rest, tohru.
Uncle has located
Japanese encyclopedia of evil.
You must research way
to defeat tarakudo
and put end
to oni mask quest.
Yes, sensei.
One more thing:
Do not forget to sweep.
Tohru: Yes, sensei.
One more thing:
Sink is clogged.
Please plunge!
Yes, sensei.
One more thing
Pee-ewh!
Rotten fish!
Take a bath!
One more thing
No more things!
(Gasps)
You disrespect uncle?
Uncle took you in,
put roof over your head,
put food in your belly--
lots of food--
and this is how
you repay me?!
I cook, I clean,
I travel the world
to be smothered in fish,
and you thank me
by demanding
many more things?
Both: I will never
speak to you again!
Oh!
Come on now!
You two are like family.
You have so much
to talk about.
Jade: Tch.
Like how come our new buddy
has a full-page ad
in demons illustrated?
"and he was known
as ikazuki,
the most fearsome
of the oni generals."
(Slurping)
Jackie!
Please tell tohru
to refrain
from making
slurping sounds.
Uh, uncle said--
Jade, please tell sensei
that I will eat my dinner
however I please.
Uh--
please ask tohru
if he would like piece
of uncle for dessert!
Jade: Uh
Uncle says
you're doing great.
Keep reading.
Tohru: "A natural leader,
"ikazuki
was second in command
"to the lord of all oni,
tarakudo, king
of the shadowkhan."
And?
The chapter ends.
Well, betcha
he could tell us
how to take down tarakudo
once and for all.
Perhaps, but I do not
think it is possible
to interrogate
a mask, Jade.
Oh?
If you wanna talk
to an inanimate mask
Try the talisman
that brings motion
to the motionless.
Are we sure dabbling
with dark forces
is the best idea?
Ikazuki lives!
Bow before
my mighty form and--
where is my mighty form?
Insolent humans.
You shall pay
for your trickery
at the hands
of my shadowkhan!
(Growls)
Ahem.
At the hands
of my shadowkhan!
The masks may only
summon shadowkhan
if they are whole,
attached
to a human host.
Jade, please
tell tohru
not to state obvious.
Uncle says "duh."
Ok, Jackie
Good cop, bad cop.
Uh, hello,
Mr. ikazuki-San.
We were wondering
if maybe you might
tell us how to defeat
tarakudo?
I shall devour your brains!
Aah!
All right, you half-baked
arts and crafts project,
start talking or I'll
redecorate your mug
with macaroni
and puffy paint!
Please,
we just need to know--
I have a glue gun
and I'm not afraid
to use it.
Your threats do not
interest me,
but he does.
M-me?
With my magnificent face
atop your mighty form,
we would be unstoppable.
Uh, no, but I--I
do not want, uh
Jade, please tell tohru
to stop quivering like
frightened chihuahua!
Please tell the
scowling Billy goat
that I am not
frightened.
Uh, easy there, boys.
Please tell tohru
that uncle will give him
something to be
frightened about!
Please tell sensei
that I would like
to see him try!
Stop! We should not be
arguing with each other.
We should be questioning
the mask.
Um, what mask?
Aiyaa!
It is gone!
How?! It is a mask!
It did not just get up
and walk away.
Did it?
Ollie, Ollie, oxen free?!
If ikazuki gets loose,
he could wind up
on someone's face.
And be able to summon
his shadowkhan.
Finn: Jelly!
Mmm. You gonna eat that?
Hey, dunk
in our own coffee.
Boo.
Pbbt!
Whoa!
A cup of talkin' Joe.
I sense that that mask
is again within our reach.
Place me upon your face
Now!
Aah!
- Aah!
Ai! Uhh! Oy!
Any sign of masky?
Nada.
- Uh-uh.
Well, our psychic leader
says it's around here
somewhere.
That's it. I'm tired
of hoofin' it.
Let's motor--whoa--ooh!
Ikazuki lives!
Bow before my mighty form!
Uhh! This is not
happening.
This is not
happening!
No way I'm bowin'
to Finn's tuccus.
Jade: So we just go back
to uncle's and use
the Hana fuda cards
to find the mask again.
No biggie, right?
Yes, biggie!
Hana fuda cards work
only once per mask.
After mask is found,
cards are wiped
clean!
Jade, please tell sensei
that we should conjure
a locator spell.
Jackie, please tell
tohru that proper
locator spell
will take too long
to make,
not that
I could hear him.
Ooh, please!
I am tired of listening
to you two not talk.
The mask escaped because
you two were fighting,
and if you keep fighting,
it will wind up on an
innocent face
before we can find it.
Aiyaa!
Tell ex-apprentice
he did not give uncle
mask removal potion!
Please tell sensei
that his ex-apprentice
has it covered.
Remove your hands
from my face!
Remove your face
from my cheeks!
Uh, Finn, I don't think
he's letting go.
Yeah, once the mask
is on, only good magic'll
pull it off, remember?
You need one of them
removal potions.
In that case
Whoa!
I will have to make do
for the time being.
(Sobs)
Whoa.
Lizard says mask
is this way.
Blowfish says
the mask is that way.
Please tell tohru
uncle's lizard
has seniority
over his blowfish.
Ohh, I give up.
Please tell sensei
Ohh
I have the willies.
And I'm guessing
they're why.
General ikazuki,
how good to see you.
You're looking rather
Heinous.
Oh, help me out,
tarakudo-mundo.
Your guy's really
giving me a wedgie!
Pipe down, wart!
Indeed, lord tarakudo,
I must seek a more
suitable host.
Tohru: Raah!
It would seem my search
is already over.
Huh?
Hello? Rude to stare.
(Gasps)
Aiyaa.
The demon from
planet ura--
Jade!
Er, Neptune.
Shadowkhan, attack!
Huh?
Shadow swords?
Dokeru kimen yaaku
Grr
Jade: Look what someone
tossed out, tarakudo.
Some perfectly good
oni poison.
No, anything but onions!
Aah! Aah! My eyes! My eyes!
Hmph!
- Hmph!
Take the giant.
Jade, please tell
tohru to look out
behind
Aiyaa!
Tohru?
- Tohru?
Tohru?
The giant will make
a most suitable host.
Yeah, better "t" than me.
Hey, say, Eddie,
chance we could swing
by a bathroom?
No!
Huh?
Oh, no.
Tohru.
Uncle: Ow!
Ow!
Ow!
Uncle, please.
No, uncle has it coming.
Ow! Uncle had opportunity
to warn tohru,
but did he? No!
All because of silly
argument.
Now my apprentice
is in danger of
becoming demon.
Ow! One more thing:
Tohru was right.
Uncle says "one more thing"
too often!
Do not worry, uncle.
Ikazuki cannot remove
himself from Finn
without the mask removal
potion,
and that is safe and sound.
In tohru's pocket?
Ohh. Bad day.
We must find tohru
before ikazuki finds potion
and places himself
on tohru's face!
But how do we find
tohru?
He got sucked
into the shadows.
Exactly.
Ikazuki: They tell me
you are a conjurer
of good magic.
They tell me you are
the maker of mask
removal potions,
so provide me with
the potion I require!
Your breath smells
like Finn's underwear.
Dude, let me have
a crack at it.
Tohru, t-man, buddy.
Look, maybe you haven't
noticed,
but I kind of have
a face on my sitting
place,
so I was wondering if
you could be a pal and--
the potion, or I shall
feast upon your brains!
Ohh, the old
good cop, bad cop.
Come on, "t", help me
out here.
I really need
a potty break.
Insolent slug!
I command you
to produce the--
potion.
Ohh
And to guide us to him,
a strand of tohru's hair.
He never did unclog sink.
Uncle are we sure
dabbling with shadow
magic is the best idea?
If we are to find where
shadowkhan are keeping tohru,
then like shadowkhan,
we must travel
through shadow.
Uncle!
Jackie!
Whoa!
- Whoa!
- Whoa!
Bad day! Bad day! Bad day!
Remove the wart from me
and place my glorious
face upon the giant's
mighty form.
Whoo-hoo! Free
at last, baby.
No. Anything but oni.
Well, what are you
waiting for?!
Uh, well, this is
kind of awkward.
Simpleton!
Do as you are told!
What he said.
Ok, but we are never
gonna bring this up again.
I'm not even here.
Attack!
Uncle: Tohru!
Sensei.
Uh, glad you guys
are talking again,
but talk later!
Hyah!
- Hyah!
Tohru! Where is
the potion?!
Uh, Jackie?
Here goes nothing.
Not now, fool!
I would lose control
of my shadowkhan
for the brief duration
my face is between hosts!
Tohru! Behind you!
Sensei, watch out!
Hyah!
- Aah!
Jackie, watch your
behind--er, behind you!
Graah!
Whoa! Ohh
Jade: Yo, Finn! Heeyah!
Whoa!
Talk about your ancient
art of butt whoop--ohh!
Uhh
Ratso, low 5!
Yes!
Ohh
No. No!
No.
No!
End of the line,
wart.
Infidel. I will have
my revenge!
UhGotta go.
Heh heh heh heh.
Heh heh heh heh.
Fools, I shall claim
a new mighty form
and devour your--
blah, blah, blah.
Thank you, Jade.
Yes, all that chatter
was giving uncle
headache.
Besides, there are
others whom I would
rather hear speak.
Likewise, sensei.
Chow: Hey, yo, Finn.
What's the big rush?
- Gotta go, gotta go, gotta go!
Hey, Jackie,
- do you like to eat raw fish?
Yeah, raw fish, yes, I do.
When I eat Japanese food,
and the Sushi,
I do eat raw fish,
but I have to put a lot
of wasabi.
Sometimes I ask myself,
"do I like raw fish
or wasabi?" I don't know.
But you give me raw fish,
I don't like it,
but with wasabi, yes.
I like raw fish.