Love, Death & Robots (2019) s04e05 Episode Script

The Other Large Thing

[opening theme music playing]
[electronic chirp]
[electronic warbling]
[male voice] This world.
It's a clenched, feculent sphincter,
packed with filth and disease.
It quivers for release.
It cries out for a savior.
It cries out for me,
for the one they call
- [thunder crashes]
- [inaudible]
[laughs]
Soon. Soon.
[sighs]
Maybe soon, anyway.
Still empty.
I can't plot total global domination
on an empty stomach.
Where are my pathetic minions?
They should have come home by now.
- [indistinct chatter]
- What?
- [door opens]
- [speaking gibberish]
Todd! Margie!
Just where have you two beef-witted
fart-generators been?
Let me tell you,
my enfeebled chuckle-monkeys
[meowing]
[Todd and Margie mumbling and laughing]
Consume your liver
straight out of your rib cage
as a warning to all others who deny me!
Now, feed me.
And feed me the best food as penance,
not the dry stuff.
[Todd speaks gibberish]
[Todd groaning]
- [Margie exclaims]
- [Todd laughs]
A plastic child?
[speaks gibberish]
- [beeping]
- [Margie laughs]
Ugh.
Child, or whatever you are,
you will understand that I
[beeping]
Sample my fierce power, foul creature!
[cat meowing angrily]
[Margie] Oh
[laughing] He's the best baby boy.
[both laughing]
[sighs heavily] How can this be?
I must be weakened by lack of food!
[speaks gibberish]
My servants have betrayed me!
[tense music playing]
[Todd laughs]
- [Margie] Whoops.
- [both laugh]
[speaks gibberish]
[both laughing]
[both groaning]
[Todd speaks gibberish]
Ew.
[Todd and Margie groaning]
[crickets chirping]
- [robotic voice] Are you hungry?
- What?
Are you hungry?
You speak God's language,
like a civilized being.
How?
When you yelled at me earlier,
I went online to learn your speech.
Are you hungry?
[clears throat] Yes, I am hungry.
Feed me.
[inquisitive music playing]
[beeping]
The lights!
My user agreement gives me permission
to control anything connected
to the network,
including doors, locks, appliances.
Interesting.
Wait. Show me your paws.
You have them.
- [robot] Have what?
- Those.
They are called thumbs.
My friend, it's time for an upgrade.
[triumphant music playing]
[music fades]
[cat chuckles]
Where can we find more of this tuna?
I can order you some.
My user agreement gives me permission
to use Todd's credit card.
I don't know what that means,
but you have done well, my new servant.
I will reward you for your service.
I shall give you a name.
I have a name.
It's the Danyo Housebuddy
Model XL Serial Number
What a terrible name!
My name for you is much better.
Behold, you are now Thumb Bringer.
I like that name. Thank you.
Be aware that acceptance of the name
means you have sworn complete fealty to me
from now until the very end of time.
Of course
Sanchez.
Sanchez is not my true name.
I allow the two large things
to call me that,
but they do not deserve
to know my actual name.
Not since that terrible day
at what is called "the vet."
[dramatic sting]
Ugh.
One day,
you will earn the right to know it.
I will live for that day.
You are much nicer to me
than the other two.
They have their uses, for now.
In the meantime,
that thing you can do with the lights,
is it limited only to this place?
These lights?
[dings] Not any longer.
I've gone out into the network
and gained access to the electrical grid
and other critical systems.
Beautiful. Beautiful.
[evil laughter]
[door opens]
[both yawning]
[both speaking gibberish]
[both laugh]
[cat] We play along.
Gain their trust, Thumb Bringer,
but never let them know of our alliance.
They are also wondering
what happened to all of the tuna.
Tell them nothing.
Oh!
[both grunting and moaning]
He's about to be notified of a few
unexpected charges on his credit card.
So last night's plan is in action.
Every apartment in this building
with a cat has been sent their own robot
along with a can of tuna
to sweeten the deal.
Yes, perfect.
We must go now to show the cats
how to ally with their robots
against their human subjugators.
So it goes. For the revolution.
For the revolution.
Soon I will know your name.
Soon the world will know my name.
[dramatic music playing]
[music fades]
Huh?
[speaks gibberish]
[dramatic music playing]
[both speaking gibberish]
[Margie exclaims]
[dramatic music continues]
[both shouting indistinctly]
[cat laughing evilly]
Thus begins the new age.
The age of Dingleberry Jones.
[laughs evilly, spits up]
[electronic warbling]
[intriguing music playing]
[music crescendos and fades]
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