Atypical (2017) s04e10 Episode Script

1
Sometimes it's hard
to know the difference
between science and magic.
Like Fata Morgana.
Fata Morgana is an optical illusion
where objects in the distance
appear to be hovering over
the surface of the water.
There's a scientific
explanation for it
but to most people,
it just looks like magic.
I know it's late.
It's okay.
That wasn't fair, what you did.
Breaking up with me like
that, that wasn't fair.
I mean, if you break up with me
because you're not
in love with me, fine.
- It makes me wanna puke, but fine.
- That's not it.
But if it's because you
think it's what's best for me,
that is so condescending.
I can decide what's best.
I can decide what I need.
I know.
And just because I'm having a hard
time, doesn't mean that I'm broken.
I didn't know what to do.
All you had to do was be there,
just be my girlfriend.
But that was the problem.
Me being your girlfriend
was making everything worse.
Why would you think that?
Because it's true.
I mean, think about when
we met. I was so mean.
And then we got together,
and I kissed someone else.
It's what I do. I ruin
things. I'm a ruiner.
Stop it. Don't talk
about yourself like that.
It was condescending.
I just convinced myself that I
was gonna mess things up with us.
And when you were so, so upset,
I blamed myself.
But you're right.
I shouldn't have.
And now all I wanna do is kiss you.
I'm okay with that.
Are we still a couple
when you go back to Newton?
Yeah, of course.
My mom isn't here.
Do you wanna stay?
- Yeah.
- Okay.
- Are you sure you're ready to
- Yeah.
Okay.
Is that a tattoo?
Yeah, I'm a bad boy.
It makes no sense that
they would cancel it.
I know, and I told them
that. It's unethical.
I mean, you've invested
time and energy and money.
Canceling puts all the applicants
in a compromised position.
Yes. What did they say?
Well, you were the only applicant.
Oh.
But they did mention Alaska.
What?
They've offered you a spot
on their trip to Alaska.
Think about it.
They're both cold. They
both start and end with A.
You could spend weekends in Juneau,
maybe shoot up to Denali
and tussle with a bear.
Alaska? Alaska is
nothing like Antarctica.
I've heard Sitka is beautiful.
Cute shops.
My parents stopped
there on a cruise once.
They actually They
brought me this bracelet.
Is this a joke?
Well, they also said that you could
reapply the semester after next,
assuming there's more interest then.
But that will be Antarctic winter,
which means it'll be dark day and night.
How will I see the penguins?
How will I see anything?
Bring a flashlight?
Look, either way, if you're
staying at Denton next semester,
you better register for classes quick.
I'm worried there's not much left.
Ugh.
That's how I got stuck with ethics.
Honey,
can you bring the salad
to the table, please?
Okey doke.
Hey!
You can have it back after dinner.
We're doing artichokes tonight?
Oh, you don't like 'em? I get it.
Kind of spiky, lot of drama.
Why don't you tell the artichokes how
you feel even though
it's not your place?
Look, I'm not in the mood, okay?
I didn't sleep well last night.
- You still having the tennis dream?
- Yeah.
Maybe because you feel
guilty for being a mean grump
who tried to blow up my life.
No, I don't feel guilty about that.
If you guys are gonna argue,
can I have my notebook back?
No, we are sitting down, having
dinner, and talking, like a family.
How you doing, honey?
Unless I'm drawing, I feel terrible.
I was late to sign up for
classes, so guess what I'm taking?
Nineteenth-century English poetry,
a pointless seminar on the moon landing,
and some other class I can't remember.
Oh, the moon landing thing sounds fun.
Why don't you go there right now?
There's more news.
I agreed to work for Bob at his
new electronics store, Bobtropolis.
It's a dumb name, it'll be a dumb
job, and my whole life is dumb now.
Well, since we're talking
about such sunny things,
I have to find a nursing
home for my mother.
Oh, how's she doing?
She's happy to be home, and she
likes the new at-home health aide,
but we agreed we have to
find a more permanent place.
Actually, I was hoping one
of you would come with me.
But honestly, you're all kinda
bumming me out, so never mind.
Typing! That's the other
awful class I'm taking.
So dumb.
Hey, Sam.
What's going on? What's all this?
I'm getting rid of everything
that reminds me of Antarctica.
- I don't wanna think about it ever again.
- Oh.
Well, that's sad.
But I do understand.
I returned the potato suit today.
I threw that unitard in the trash,
and I just covered it in wet garbage.
It was awesome.
Now I'm just here for my Os.
What?
My box of O Magazines.
God, please tell me that you
didn't sell them at the yard sale.
Of course not. They're under that table,
and there's a couple
propping up Zahid's desk.
Oh good.
Now that I quit potato hell
and found my magical birds,
I need to get crackin'
and find my purpose.
But I realized something.
Know how I've been writing letters
to women of greatness since I was five?
- Mm-hmm.
- Well, some of them have responded,
and almost all have
urged me to keep in touch.
So
behold.
Twenty-seven stamped letters asking
the world's most badass ladies
if they need a motivated
self-starter on their team.
Hmm, just don't get your hopes up.
Well, I was hoping for a "good for you."
Although I also would have accepted,
"Ooh, flowers of the American West?"
"Perfect stamp choice, Paige."
Look out, world. I'm back.
- Hi, Zahid.
- Zahid, how are you doing?
Okay.
Your boy here picked me up, and
that drive was smooth as butter.
Then I spent a week at Jay
and Padma's icing my junk.
Now that I'm down to
just one bean in my bag,
I feel like we've gotten closer.
How's it going here?
Why is the apartment so empty?
I'm getting rid of everything
to do with Antarctica,
except these boots.
They're stuck here like me.
Damn those pesky reminders.
I'll take 'em out for you.
It's the least I can do after
you learned to drive for me.
Plus, Chip, the guy that
lives upstairs, is super handy.
He's always tinkering
with his car outside.
- I'm sure he has tools we can borrow.
- Whatever. Probably won't work.
Sam, would you like an O? They
always lift me up when I'm down.
I already borrowed one to put
at the bottom of Edison's tank,
but I doubt you want that back.
I'll take a couple.
Oh, okay.
Ooh, holiday survival
guide. That sounds important.
Yeah, that's a good one.
It's time to say goodbye.
I'm not going to
Antarctica probably ever,
and anything that reminds me of
that fact makes me mad and sad,
and I feel like I'm letting you down.
So,
I'm just gonna try not to
think about Antarctica
which means I won't
be around for a while,
but I'll have Casey come check on you.
She can be rude, but that
won't really bother you.
Goodbye, Stumpy.
Second verse, same as the first!
Only this time she's even faster!
How'd you get so much faster?
Actually, if it's something
illegal, I don't wanna know.
Just keep doing it, and maybe
give some to these slowpokes.
Welcome back. We're
gonna suck a lot less now.
That is the truth.
Now, obviously, Gardner
is gonna retake her spot
as anchor of the 4x1, 4x4.
Sorry, Sharice.
Oh no. Wait, does that
mean you're benched?
- Sharice, I'm sorry. I don't
- Are you kidding?
I don't care about stupid
running. Just want you.
All right, enough of that.
Okay, you can hug if you want to.
Mm.
Aw, man, I'm graduating right
when we're starting to get good.
- You hear this one got a scholarship?
- Just Denton.
The program's actually really
good. You should check it out.
Um, she's my best friend.
- Ain't that right?
- Yeah, that's right.
And apparently for a Division
III school, Denton's pretty good.
And I wouldn't have to move far.
I could live here if I wanted to.
You don't wanna live here now.
It's not terrible. Free food, haircuts.
So is UCLA not an option anymore?
I don't know. I'm not asking.
Why?
It's
It's far.
And I don't know anyone there.
I mean, Mom, my poor fingers
have been through enough.
You have always talked about
leaving after you graduated.
For years, you would make
yourself pretend bus tickets.
You and Sharice were
very fond of Orlando.
Yeah, they have, like, 17 water parks.
How about this?
You and I can go and
visit a few colleges
out of state and just get a sense of
I don't want to.
Okay?
And, hey, if I go to Denton,
I can smack Sam in the
head whenever I need to.
And that's helpful for all of us, right?
Yeah!
Yeah.
Whoo!
Damn it.
Are you okay?
Did you have that tennis dream again?
Same score?
Fifty-four to zero?
Do you know that's not
even a real tennis score?
Did you get to eat the bread this time?
You know, I was looking
in my dream book,
and I think that Sam
represents your inner child.
Okay, don't waste your
time thinking about this.
It's just a stupid dream.
Hey, whatcha smooshing?
It's Little Dude in Antarctica.
I got rid of all my Antarctica stuff,
books, posters, a big giant penguin,
and I still keep drawing it.
It's out of your house, but
it's not out of your head.
Yes, exactly. It's
extremely frustrating.
I think that's okay.
What?
The only way to get past
it is to go through it.
Draw and draw and draw Antarctica
till all the Antarctica is out of you.
- Really?
- Heck yeah.
You don't want those Little Dudes
getting clogged up in your brain.
You're right, I don't.
When my guinea pig
died, I drew 274 unicorns
in a weekend.
You gotta do what it takes.
Go nuts.
Hi there.
Oh.
Hello.
You're not Chip.
Nope, Chip moved out.
I moved in. I'm Honey.
I'm Zahid.
Uh, s sorry, I don't
mean to bother you.
Um, I just needed to
borrow some tools from Chip.
I don't have a lot of tools,
but I should get some though.
- Huh.
- I should get some really big tools.
Oh.
I do have a hammer.
Did you wanna nail anything?
Um
But, um
Ugh.
I don't have a screwdriver though,
so we can't screw.
I'm just trying to help my friend.
"I'm just trying to help my friend"?
I mean, what was I thinking?
I had so many chances
to use my sweet lines.
It was all right there for me.
Tools, drilling, nailing,
banging, cocking.
Flex shaft.
Groin vault.
Cabinet scraper.
I just
So, what happened?
We had a cup of tea and
talked for, like, three hours.
I'm such an idiot.
Well, Zahid,
that sounds really good.
- It does?
- Yeah, it sounds like a date.
But we had our clothes on.
What did you guys talk about?
Just, like, our lives,
our hopes, our fears.
I didn't even compliment
her tatas once, damn it.
That's how real relationships happen.
Oh.
Wait a minute. Am I a
nicer guy after my surgery?
Did I have a bad ball?
Is it possible that my right nut
was the evil twin?
I don't think so.
I think it's pretty clear you're wrong.
Life's pretty funny, huh?
Turns out I had to lose a
testicle to become a better man.
You're not that much better.
Thank you for trying,
Sammy, but I clearly am.
Now, if you'll excuse
me, I have to get ready.
I'm going out to dinner with Honey.
I'm sure I won't even make a move.
So, I have some kinda crazy news.
Remember those 27 letters that I wrote?
Of course.
Well, I already heard back from
the head of Habitat for Humanity.
She offered me a job in
their main office, in Georgia.
Whoa.
Yeah, I know. I mean,
it's good for the world.
I would learn a lot.
It's business casual,
which is totally my jam.
But get this. It would start in a week.
A week?
Yeah.
I mean, that's That's
just too fast, you know?
It It's It's not practical.
So I I'm gonna say no.
Hmm, that does sound impossible.
So you're in agreement,
I should turn it down?
Absolutely.
Oh.
Good.
Good.
Okay, I'm gonna go look
at that place for Grandma.
It's an hour and a half drive,
so I'll probably be gone a while.
- Why don't you come with me?
- No, thanks. Very busy.
Are you watching cartoons?
I'm technically a kid.
We can stop for fast food, both ways.
I see all that healthy food you packed.
There's something with leaves
sticking out of the top. Pass.
Come on. I could use the support.
Fine.
But if you start to annoy me
with your incessant chatter ,
I get to play music as loud as I want.
Deal. But you have to
change out of that T-shirt.
Oh, this?
Beth gave me this.
We're friends again.
"Best friends forever."
All right, but leave the snacks.
I don't want you getting any ideas.
- Oh!
- You know what I'm wondering?
If you could eat any slower.
Because patients who are
bleeding out on the street
love to wait around for some kid to
finish his lunch at a snail's pace.
- Still not sleeping, huh?
- Nah.
You know what you need
to try? Bowhunting.
- What?
- Yeah, it resets the mind.
My uncle goes all the time.
This elk jerky?
It's from him.
I could call him if you want.
Unfortunately, I don't think
I'll be able to join you
'cause according to my pay stub,
I've earned a grand total of
one-third of a vacation day.
Well, wait till you're my
age. I have 54 saved up.
You have 54 vacation days?
Fifty-four to zero.
Oh, man.
I mean, if I had 54 vacation days,
I'd pack up my car, and I'd
head straight to Myrtle Beach.
I've been there before
with some friends.
It's, like, super nice.
So when are you gonna
tell me why we're here?
Are you sending Grandma to Newton?
Who's that lady?
- That is Emily.
- Who's Emily?
- Emily works at UCLA.
- Mom.
You have talked about
leaving home since you
were three years old.
Honestly, it used to
hurt my feelings a little.
But now, hearing you
talk about not leaving,
that hurts my feelings more.
It's not that big a deal.
It is.
I've always envied how big you dream.
I know what happened at
Clayton, your anxiety issues.
I know that scared you.
I don't wanna go through that again.
And I don't want you to.
But you are a brave, strong person,
and you can handle scary things.
And I'm not saying
you have to go to UCLA.
Just go meet with the nice lady.
You tricked me.
I did.
And now go fly, like the bird
you have tattooed on your arm.
I have been hiding that from you.
No, you haven't.
And you're grounded.
Okay.
I'm going to Antarctica.
What do you mean? You mean, Alaska?
No, of course not.
Oh, Alaska's a good idea.
I'll be honest. For a long time,
I didn't know the difference.
Antarctica, Alaska, they're
both cold, they sound the same.
I'm not going to Alaska.
Wh What happened, Sam?
This.
Mom, you told me a long time ago
that Little Dude helped me adapt.
Well, he just did it
again. He got on a ship.
That's what I'm gonna do.
I don't need a program
to go to Antarctica.
I can go on my own.
How?
It's really far and really
cold, and you're small and frail.
True, but think about it.
I'm already prepared.
I have my supplies. I have my
itinerary. I even raised my own money.
I just need to book a place to
stay and my travel, and voilà!
Wow, that's amazing, Sam.
Honey, that's
incredible.
I am so proud of you.
Thanks, but I just came to
look through some old journals.
I have some facts written in
there that I need for my trip.
And then I have to go to the aquarium
and tell Stumpy the good news.
Well, you need a ride?
I can drive now. I just
need to borrow a car.
Well, I'll lend you the
truck, but I'm gonna drive it.
Okay.
So no Alaska?
Shut up.
Sam, you ready to go?
Good news, Stumpy. I'm going
to Antarctica after all.
Sorry if I worried you.
I don't think she could
hear you through the water.
I know, but I like talking
to her. She's my friend.
I get it.
You gonna miss your friends?
You seem to have a lot
of them all of a sudden.
Yeah.
But I have to go.
I know what I wanna do
and where I wanna be,
so I don't feel like I have a choice.
Yeah, I wanted to
talk to you about that.
I know what I wanna do
and where I wanna be too.
And I have all these vacation
days saved up, and, well
Can I come with you to Antarctica?
I know you did all the
planning and preparing.
I'll just be there to lift
the heavy bags, I promise.
Okay, you can come.
Yeah?
Yeah.
Okay.
Okay.
So, this thing happened.
Elsa tricked me.
You think she's nice, but
she's nothing but trouble.
- Mm-hmm.
- She completely lied to me.
She made me eat healthy snacks,
and she talked my ear off.
What are you trying to tell me?
I met with a scout from UCLA.
Wow.
So did I.
- Really?
- Yeah.
- Emily?
- Emily.
- Holy crap!
- I know.
I don't know if it's gonna happen,
but if either of us gets
in, that person needs to go,
whether or not the other one does.
- Promise?
- Promise.
- Forehead promise?
- Forehead promise.
Um,
am I in the wrong room?
Look, I'm here to apologize, so be nice.
I'm listening.
I shouldn't have said
all that stuff to Izzie.
You were right. It wasn't my place.
Dad
that's not why I was mad.
I just wanted you to like her.
What you think is important.
I know.
You know, I think I focus
too much on your life.
Because for a long time, I felt
like you were the only person
in this family I understood.
Same here.
And that's changing now,
like it should.
Okay.
And I'm sorry.
And, hey, you know, I
didn't like Evan at first.
Now look at us. We're like best buddies.
Maybe in a couple years, Izzie and I
will be driving around
in an ambulance together.
God. Yeah, I highly doubt it.
She doesn't like you either.
Mm.
- And guess what?
- What?
I'm going to Antarctica with Sam.
You are?
Good.
- You're gonna be so cold.
- I know.
Ooh.
I'm sorry.
It's okay.
Ooh, that looks so yummy.
I don't think anything could
beat those butter noodles.
They were exceptional.
Holy moly, you know
what I just realized?
Sam, we've never made it to
dessert at the Olive Garden.
What?
Well, historically, our meals here
have ended in some sort
of upsetting skirmish
somewhere around the
appetizers, but not tonight.
Tonight, we celebrate with cheesecake.
Mm.
Sam, I'm really excited for your trip.
I mean, I'll miss you, of course,
but I just think it's
really important that you go.
I think it's really
important that you go too.
What?
I was going through my archives
because I couldn't remember the
population density of Antarctica.
It's one one-hundredth of
a human per square mile.
And I came across this.
It's my old pros and cons list of you.
Well, what's left of it.
Zahid ripped out the original.
And I made an etching.
And then you ripped that one out too.
But you can still make
out some of the words.
"Smart, loyal, clean shoes."
And I wrote that after
knowing you for, like, a week.
And now I've known you for 116 weeks,
and you are smarter and more loyal
and have cleaner shoes than
I ever could have imagined.
Sam. You counted the weeks?
They were good weeks.
I think the reason that your
magical bird is middle fingers
is that you're good at
advocating for people.
Like how you got the school
to hold a silent dance,
or you yelled at those kids
for signing my yearbook.
Well, thank you.
But I wasn't very supportive
about Antarctica at first.
But then you were.
And now I have to
do the same for you.
What do you mean?
I think you should take that
job in Georgia building habitats.
What? But it starts so soon.
- It doesn't matter.
- I'd have to leave in a few days.
- I know.
- Sam, I'd be gone for, like, a year.
At least.
I'm scared.
I know.
But you're the bravest
person I know, Paige.
Well, this means that I won't be here
when you leave or when you get back.
I know.
So how are we supposed to stay
together being so far apart?
I don't know.
I never thought I
could find a girlfriend,
and then I found the best
one in the world, you.
But now you need to
go, and I need to go,
so I think maybe
we should break up for a while.
Darn it.
I think you're right.
And I really hate that.
Me too.
Well, I mean, who knows? Maybe
Maybe someday we can
pick up where we left off.
Maybe.
But just because we're taking a break
from being girlfriend and boyfriend
doesn't mean I'll ever take a
break from being in love with you.
Neither will I, Sam.
- Got everything, bud?
- Yep.
- Will you and Edison be okay?
- Oh yeah.
Honey's coming by for vegan enchiladas.
I think it's time they met.
- Don't let her hold him.
- Of course not.
Oh, hey, one more thing.
Y You got them out.
Honey and I bought a big tool.
And that's all I have to say about that.
Bye, Edison.
Bye, Zahid.
Thank you for being the best friend
ever and the best godfather ever.
I may be the best godfather,
but you're the best friend.
I'm gonna miss you, homie.
I'll miss you too.
Sammy, wait.
Sorry I didn't ask first.
It's okay. At least it's tight.
The old Zahid would make a
joke about that, but I've grown.
The old Zahid would make
a joke about that too.
Yeah.
Yeah, he would.
You have enough socks? Undies?
How about your boots?
Are they broken in?
Because if you put 'em on
brand-new, you're gonna get blisters,
and then you'll have to take them off,
and then your feet will freeze off.
My boots are fine.
I can't believe you're leaving.
Me neither.
But it feels right.
It does.
You worried about me being gone?
I'll miss you, but no.
You guys are gonna have a blast.
I'm generally pretty
chill about this stuff.
Right, super chill.
I love you.
I love you too.
Ready?
I know.
I'm here. Let's skedaddle.
I have something for you.
A hand?
My hand.
So if you do something stupid,
I can smack you from the
other side of the world.
Well, if I do something
stupid, I'll probably die,
but this will be a good reminder
to stay smart, so thank you.
You're welcome.
I have something for you too.
Your green hoodie?
But this is your favorite.
Yes, it's my best one.
It's too thin for Antarctica,
but it's just right for here.
Yep, that's the best way to wear it.
My turn with the explorer.
Listen
Uh Mm
Wha
Uh
I think she's trying to
say she's proud of you.
Thanks, Mom.
You're welcome.
Okay. We're all set here.
Oh, your passports.
Okay, can't forget your passports.
Sam, you look so sweet in your photo.
You know, that's the one photo
you're not supposed to smile for.
I couldn't help it. I'm so happy.
Well, you ready to go?
Ready.
Okay.
- Oh.
- I love you.