The Brady Bunch (1969) s04e19 Episode Script

1
Here's the story
Of a lovely lady
Who was bringing up
Three very lovely girls
All of them had hair of gold ♪
Like their mother
The youngest one in curls ♪
It's the story of a man named Brady ♪
Who was busy with
three boys of his own ♪
They were four men living all together ♪
Yet they were all alone ♪
Till the one day
when the lady met this fellow ♪
And they knew that it was
much more than a hunch ♪
That this group
must somehow form a family ♪
That's the way we all
became the Brady Bunch ♪
The Brady Bunch
The Brady Bunch
That's the way
we became the Brady Bunch. ♪
PETER: Mom, Dad! Mom, Dad!
Oh! You all right? You all right?
Fine. What's all the excitement?
Alice, the greatest thing in the world
just happened to me.
Yeah? What?
First, have there been
any phone calls for me? Nope.
You sure? Positive.
Maybe it didn't happen.
What didn't happen?
But maybe it will anyway.
Peter, what happened that didn't happen
that maybe will anyway?
Alice, I don't want to get your hopes up.
I promise.
I just want to know what's going on.
( Phone rings )
Maybe that's it.
Hello. This is Peter.
Yes, Mr. Martinelli?
What? Oh, wow, that's great!
Sorry, Mr. Martinelli.
I hurt his ear.
Sorry I yelled, but I'm real happy, sir.
Yes, sir.
Yes, sir.
Yes, sir!
It did happen!
Mom, Dad, it happened!
( Screams ): What happened?!
PETER: Mom, Dad! Mom, Dad!
It happened, it happened!
Dad, it happened.
Well, that's great.
What happened?
I got my first job.
Terrific!
Well, that's wonderful.
Thanks.
Who are you working for?
Mr. Martinelli at the bike shop. Yeah?
I'm gonna work for him
on Saturdays and after school.
I'm going to fix bikes.
Well, put her there.
My son, the bike doctor.
Oh, we're proud of you, Peter.
From now on, I won't be a
financial burden to you anymore.
Oh, well, that's a load off my wallet.
And I won't be needing
an allowance anymore.
No allowance? Nope.
You're sure?
Well, maybe just one more
for old times' sake.
Yeah.
I got to go tell the guys.
Oh, listen, Peter.
Now that you're taking on a job,
you're taking on responsibility, you know.
Sure, Dad.
Be prompt, hardworking and loyal.
Got it.
Peter, one more thing:
Don't be clumsy.
Bye-bye.
Well, Peter, how's it coming, eh?
Fine, Mr. Martinelli,
and don't you worry
I'm going to be prompt,
hardworking, loyal, neat
and I'm not going to watch the clock.
I'm sure, I'm sure, Peter.
Uh, Peter, Mr. Williams
is in a hurry for this bike.
Yes, sir, I know.
Hey, listen to this.
( Gear clicking smoothly )
Sounds perfect.
Only nine more gears to go.
Nine more?
But it's almost quitting time, Peter.
Oh. Thanks for reminding me.
I would have kept right on working.
( Whistling tune )
Oh, hi, Pete.
Hi.
Hi. How come all the bikes?
Well, all the guys at school
happened to hear
that you were working for Mr. Martinelli.
How'd they happen to hear that?
Bobby called them up and he told them.
How come they didn't bring
their bikes to the shop?
Well, that way,
Mr. Martinelli makes money.
This way, we do.
What do you mean, "we"?
Well, um, you and me and Cindy.
You do the work and
we get the commission.
Forget it.
I wouldn't do a thing
like that to Mr. Martinelli.
You and your bright ideas.
Well, how am I supposed to know
Peter wouldn't moonlight?
How how's everything, Peter?
Coming along just fine, Mr. Martinelli.
Peter, you're working
on the same bicycle
you was working on yesterday.
Yes, sir.
But Mr. Williams wants the bicycle.
I'm just trying to get it in tip-top condition
so he'll be a real satisfied customer.
That's what we want, isn't it?
Yes, but we want both
satisfied and customers, Peter.
Hmm.
Uh-uh! Caught you.
Well, have mercy, ma'am.
You know how I love olives.
I'm an olive freak.
Hi.
Hi.
Hi, Peter.
Well, how's the big businessman today?
Mr. Martinelli couldn't have been nicer.
No, I meant you.
Oh, I'm doing great.
You know, while I was working today
I got to thinking about you two.
About us?
Yeah, I got to thinking
that maybe you and Mom
ought to take up bike riding.
It's very healthy.
Oh, my gosh.
I haven't been on a bike in years.
It's not too late.
I mean, you're not in bad condition
considering your age and everything.
Thank you.
You, too, Mom.
You could get yourself
back in shape again.
I thought I was in shape.
( Chuckles )
Pete, are you trying to sell us
a couple of bikes? Is that it?
Well, there's nothing wrong
with a businessman drumming
up a little business, is there?
No, not at all.
As a matter of fact, I think
it's a very good idea, Peter.
Great!
Mike, you know that
isn't a bad idea at all.
Huh? It might tighten up all those olives.
Oh, honey, I get plenty of exercise.
I play golf almost every weekend.
I don't.
I also play tennis with the guys.
I don't.
I also swim at the club. I don't.
Well, maybe I'll buy you a bike.
MARTINELLI: Well,
how's it coming, Peter?
Just fine, Mr. Martinelli.
You're still working
on Mr. Williams' bicycle.
I sure am.
You've been working on it
for three days now.
I took the brakes apart today.
But Mr. Williams didn't ask
to have the brakes fixed.
There's nothing wrong with them.
I found that out.
Three days.
How could you possibly work on
the same bicycle for three days?
I guess I got a lot of patience.
I wish I could say the same
thing for Mr. Williams.
( Phone ringing )
Peter, please finish it.
( Voice quavering ): I want
good work, and I want it finished!
( Phone continues ringing )
Martinelli's Bike Shop.
Oh, hello, Mr. Williams. I
Nice day for a bike ride?
Well, yes and no.
I'm afraid, Mr. Williams, it's not ready yet.
Yes, I I know
I promised it to you by noon,
but I'm having trouble with the help
and I'm afraid I need a new boy.
Yes. Later today, definitely.
I'll finish it myself, Mr. Williams.
Good-bye.
Um, Peter, why don't
you go to lunch now
and I'll finish the bike.
Lunch already? Yeah.
Time really goes fast
when you're doing something you like.
Peter
Yes, Mr. Martinelli?
After work today, I would like to have
a little talk with you, all right?
Yes, sir.
You think I'm doing okay?
Well
You think someday I can
even become a bike salesman?
Well, to tell the truth
I think maybe you'll
be better selling bikes
than fixing them.
Really?
Oh, thanks, Mr. Martinelli.
( Whistling tune )
PETER: Mom, Alice!
Oh, Peter, we were just fixing your lunch.
You know what happened?
I got promoted!
Promoted? After just three days?
Look out, Howard Hughes.
Here comes Peter Brady.
Peter, are you sure?
Well, I'm not really positive
but I told you how pleased
Mr. Martinelli is with my work.
Whenever he watches me, he has
a surprised look on his face
like he can't believe it.
What did Mr. Martinelli say?
He told me I'd even be
better as a bike salesman.
He wants to talk to me about it
right after work today.
Oh, that's wonderful.
Fantastic. You think maybe
that that might call
for an extra slice of bologna?
Peter, you're a nice boy.
You're neat, you're prompt,
you're considerate.
You never goof off,
and you always look busy.
But you don't have the talent for this job.
I'm sorry, Peter, but I have
customers who need their bikes
and I just can't keep them waiting.
I'll try harder, Mr. Martinelli.
You try hard enough,
but you're just not mechanically inclined.
You know what to do,
but somehow it gets lost
between here and here.
Good luck, Peter.
I got fired.
Ah!
Oh, wow!
That looks great, Alice!
Oh, just call me the
Picasso of the pastry tube.
I wish I could learn to do that.
All it takes is a little practice.
How'd you learn?
I started with mud pies
and worked my way up.
Boy, will Peter be surprised
when he sees this.
Well, he deserves it.
There.
After only three days on the job
to get a promotion
if anything calls for a celebration
that does.
Mm-hmm.
Hey, I heard you were promoted.
Uh-uh. Just the opposite.
Demoted?
Outmoded.
What?
I got fired.
Fired?
How come?
Mr. Martinelli says I'm
not mechanically inclined.
I guess I'm too slow.
That's too bad, Pete.
I don't know what to do.
What did Mom and Dad say?
I haven't told them yet.
I didn't want to spoil anybody's dinner
especially mine.
Tell them right after dinner.
Yeah, I guess so.
I sure wasn't a business tycoon
for very long.
( Indistinct talking )
Oh, well anyway
Mom, Dad, can I talk
to you about something?
Sure.
I have a feeling
it's going to be about bicycles.
Well, sort of.
Yes?
ALICE: Surprise!
( All talking at once )
MIKE: Oh, look at that.
What's the cake for?
JAN: To celebrate your promotion.
Aren't you surprised?
( Flatly ): Boy, am I ever.
All the girls helped me make it.
ALICE: Look at that.
CAROL: Isn't it beautiful?
MIKE: Bet it tastes even better.
Speech! Speech!
I I don't know what to say.
I mean, so much
has happened to me today.
I I guess I should say something,
but I can't not right now.
Give him a sparkler.
BOBBY: Here, Peter. A large one.
I want a big piece!
All right.
( Everyone talking excitedly )
( Whispering ): Greg?
Yeah?
I know I should tell Mom and Dad
but I'd hate to wake them up.
I don't think they're asleep yet.
Well, if I wait any longer, they might be.
You should have told them after dinner.
How could I, with
the cake and the speech?
Greg, I really need some advice.
( Sighs )
Ask Mr. Martinelli for one more chance.
Then, if he takes you back,
you won't have to say
anything to anybody.
Yeah yeah.
I knew you'd help me.
Thanks, Greg.
Yeah. One more chance.
Yeah
yeah.
Peter
Like I said before, Peter,
you're a nice boy a very nice boy
and I'm sorry, really sorry,
but I have to get a new boy.
I just thought I'd ask, but maybe we
Nothing personal.
It's just simply
that you're not mechanically inclined.
Well, maybe I can learn
to be mechanically inclined.
Peter, Peter
Some people make picture frames
and some other people
paint the pictures.
Who knows? Maybe you're an artist.
Good-bye.
Thanks, Mr. Martinelli.
What's the matter, Peter?
My sisters are coming to see me.
They don't know I've been fired.
You didn't tell your family?!
Not yet. Please, Mr. Martinelli,
don't say anything.
But uh Thanks, Mr. Martinelli.
I'll tell them later.
Well, can I help you young ladies?
Well, we'd rather wait
and let the other salesman help us.
Other salesman?
We're Peter Brady's sisters.
Are you the nice man
who promoted him?
Promoted him?
Made him a salesman.
Oh. Oh, I see.
We wanted Peter to wait on us.
I need a horn for my bike.
( Horn beeping )
Why don't you let me
help you with the horns?
We got loud horns, soft horns
Now, remember, Peter gets
the credit for this sale.
Yes, ma'am.
( Horn beeping )
That's it that's all I have
to feed you guys.
Mr. Martinelli should be
closing up shop about now
so I guess I'd better be going home
from my job.
Hey, congratulations, Peter.
Huh?
The girls told me you're a salesman now.
Doing great, huh?
Yep. Got them eating
right out of my hands.
How did you get
Mr. Martinelli to take you back?
I didn't.
You're kidding.
Yeah, I'm kidding everybody.
I asked Mr. Martinelli to cover for me
so I could break the news myself.
Well, where were you all afternoon?
In the park.
Doing what?
Feeding the pigeons, and thinking.
Pete, you're going to
have to tell the folks.
I know.
That's what I was thinking about.
It's nice having someone
you can tell your troubles to.
I wish I could tell
my mom and dad, but I can't.
I'm a failure at 14.
But who am I to tell them a thing like that
about their own son?
Mom, Dad?
I didn't mean to interrupt.
I was just looking for my books.
There they are.
Sorry to bother you.
Uh Peter, your father
and I have been thinking
about what you said.
What did I say?
About bike riding.
Oh.
We've decided we'd like to get bicycles.
And we're going to buy them
from Mr. Martinelli's star salesman.
I I wouldn't do that.
Why?
Well, all that exertion
on a man as old as you are could be bad.
Just the other day, you
said it wasn't too late.
Well, that was the other day.
And, besides, some people get excited
and go out and buy bikes
and they never even use them.
Well, we'd use them.
Sure, we would.
Well, I'd give it
some more consideration
like maybe a week, or two,
or even a month.
I mean, what's the hurry?
Excuse me.
Well, that's a switch.
I've heard of low-pressure salesmen,
but never no-pressure salesmen.
Wonder why the big change.
Listen, maybe Mr. Martinelli
could give us a clue.
Well, I would sure love to know
what let the air out of Peter's tires.
You guys just don't know
how lucky you are to be pigeons.
Nobody can fire you,
and you get free food.
But I can't keep this up forever.
Sooner or later, I'll
have to tell my mom and dad.
No wonder you guys like me so much
you're pigeons and I'm chicken.
( Bicycle bell rings )
Oh, my gosh!
Ah!
Hi, Mom. Hi, Dad.
Oh, that's pretty good
for an old man, huh?
Hey, you got some room on that bench
for a woman of my age?
I I was just feeding the pigeons.
Peter, Mr. Martinelli
told us what happened.
Yeah, and Greg filled us in on the rest.
Oh. I I wanted to tell you,
but I was too ashamed.
Peter, there's nothing to be ashamed of.
Of course not. There's
no shame in being fired.
I've lost jobs.
You have?
Practically everybody has
at one time or another.
But this is my first job,
and I bombed out
only after three days.
Peter, Mr. Martinelli said you really tried.
It's just that he didn't
think you were cut out
for this particular job.
He thinks you're
a very bright young man.
Is that what he said? Honest?
Honest.
Peter, you should
have told us, you know.
Hiding out in the park
hasn't helped anyone.
Hah! Except maybe the pigeons.
Yeah, they kind of liked it.
Oh, by the way,
this is for you from Mr. Martinelli.
What for?
That's your commission
for those two bikes
you talked us into buying.
But I tried to talk you out of buying them.
You can't help it if we're stubborn.
You know something?
I feel a lot better right now.
Good. So do we.
Listen, now that the whole
family has bicycles,
I know a great way to keep them
from rusting away in the garage.
( Groans )
BOBBY: Mom! Dad!
In here, Bob.
Dad, guess what!
What?
I got my own job, all by myself.
I got my own job!
Hey, you did?
Well, that's great.
What are you doing?
I'm delivering newspapers before school.
Oh, Bobby, you have to get up
at 5:00 in the morning to do that.
Well, I don't mind.
You're going to have to go
all over the neighborhood,
you know. That's miles.
I don't mind.
Besides, you can't do it on a bike.
You'll have to have a car.
I know.
Well, now you're being silly.
You can't drive.
No, but you can.
( Groans )