Trying (2020) s05e06 Episode Script

Everybody, come down.
- Barbara's here.
- I'll get it.
My hair's not doing that thing.
I thought we wanted
to stop it from doing that.
No, obviously not.
We have to say we like Barbara,
even if we don't.
In case one day we have to
tell him we don't like her,
and then he can't turn around
and say, "You never liked her."
Okay.
What film is this supposed to be?
This is The Ring.
There's a fancy dress Halloween screening.
It's bit of a… bit of a special film
for me and your dad.
But we can't both go
dressed as the same thing,
- which is why--
- But you hate scary films.
Well, we watched this on our third date,
so contextually, it's romantic.
Okay, so it was a move to get you
all scared and cuddling up.
- No, it wasn't a move.
- No.
It was definitely a move.
No, no, I do hate horror films.
They're for sociopaths who don't
find the actual world terrifying enough.
If you wanna feel scared,
you pop something in the microwave
and you forget about it.
That ping out of nowhere? Honestly.
- God.
- They're better than
- your art house films, aren't they?
- What?
Honestly, if I have to see
another ambiguous bloody ending…
You're halfway through a scene,
then suddenly it just cuts.
What does it mean?
With a horror film, at the end,
everyone's dead. That's closure.
It reflects real life.
No one really dies in real life.
Hold on. Where-- Where are you going?
Party at Maddy's house.
- I said no to that.
- But Dad said yes.
No, hang on.
You told me that she said yes.
This sounds like a process issue
that we could work out
maybe when I get back from the party.
- Right.
- Right, okay. Okay.
- Hold on a second. That is just…
- What's this dress now?
It's like a belt.
- This is Barbara.
- Barbara!
Hello, Barbara. How are you?
- Fantastic outfit.
- Hello.
Sorry…
I just-- I just wanted to say,
I don't know where this journey will…
- Sorry, I wrote it down actually.
- She's written it down.
"I don't know where
this journey will end for both of you,
- but I feel so privileged to"--
- Dad, you promised.
All right. Okay, all right.
Welcome to the family, Barbara.
- Okay. Nik, let her go, please.
- Yeah. We're going.
- Yeah. Okay, sorry.
- Have fun dancing, all right?
Enjoy your trick-or-treating, you two.
Okay, and,
"Barbara, we look forward to going
on this journey with you." All right?
- Bye!
- See ya!
Okay, I'm gonna go now as well.
Don't let anyone--
Take me to a secondary location.
Yeah, I know.
- This house needs a new catchphrase.
- It can happen quickly
- and without you realizing--
- I'm aware. I'm savvy.
I'm literally known for that.
Okay, well, let's go watch a scary film
with some absolute morons.
All right!
I'm a bit nervous about this.
Why? We've seen it loads of times.
No, I mean taking
outside snacks into the cinema.
Still gonna eat
the snacks I sneak in though?
Yeah, well, I mean,
when they're in there, I may as well.
You're a mob wife, you are.
You disapprove, but you're not ready
to give up the fur coats yet, are you?
What?
You just checked her out
while I was right here.
I did not check her out.
What are you talking about?
I'm standing next to you.
- I was looking at a kid next to her.
- Right, what kid?
Cute kid she had next to her,
dressed as a ghost.
So you mean to tell me there was
a little ghost floating around
that only you can see?
- Should we have a check then, shall we?
- Yeah.
- Yeah, no. Nothing.
- Yeah, let's have a look.
Aisle two, what? Yeah.
Where are they? Maybe they left.
Give us that back. Thank you.
Hello, mate. Sorry. Excuse me.
- Jase.
- Hi, yeah, sorry to bother you.
I don't suppose you seen
a little kid walking about here, have you?
About 4 years old, dressed as a ghost.
- Nah, sorry, mate.
- Well, there you go.
Hey, buddy, they've lost their kid.
You seen them walking about?
- No, no, no, no, no.
- No, no.
We haven't lost our kid.
Basically, what it is,
is that my wife here thinks that she saw
me checking out a hot woman,
when I wasn't, so that's it.
So, you thought she was hot?
No, you said… No, hang on. You s…
I'm getting that from, you know, context.
Why are you making a big deal
- out of this?
- No, it's okay.
I know it's instinctive for you to eye up
your targets like Predator, sex predator.
Oh, my God.
I look at one lovely little kid,
and all of a sudden, I'm a sex predator.
Scott!
Scott?
Scott. You promised me
you were gonna get up today.
If I'd known therapy would throw you
into a depression,
I would never have suggested it.
It is the Western disease.
Soft brains.
Oh, my God. Are you permanently here?
You know, this house cannot be that dirty.
Why he sad? Nothing has happened.
Has bear come too close to village? No.
Is snow too thick to bury dead? No.
Has cousin built house
with wood that's too dry?
- No!
- Nadya,
you grew up in Moscow
and your dad was a chartered surveyor.
Do you think he's gonna be okay?
No.
Is your sister meeting us there then?
My sister's not coming.
What?
- Maddy, you told me she was coming!
- No, I said she used to come here.
- That's how I know it's a good party.
- Oh, my God.
How are we gonna
get in if we don't know anyone?
No one's gonna stop two hot girls
from going into a party.
That's like the Rolex shop
not letting in rich guys.
- God, it sounds really big.
- Good.
We need a party where there's
not a 12-year-old brother in the corner
playing Mario Kart
'cause we "have to include him."
Come on. It's just down here.
Thank you.
Can you not hide them better? They'll see.
No. No, I can't.
I'm sorry, have you seen the price
of popcorn? It's bloody outrageous.
They've broken the social contract.
You know what?
I'm of half a mind to take a toilet roll
- from the bathroom before we leave.
- You will not.
You know, Jase,
it's fine that you looked at her,
- just admit it.
- Oh, my God.
- Come on, Nik, please.
- I wish men had cleavage
that I could stare at and lie about it.
Do you really think I'm gonna get excited
about a woman in a low-cut top?
Please. If I wanted to see a naked woman,
I've got a billion of them
in my pocket right now.
Right. So you noticed it was low-cut then?
You were talking about cleavage--
No, I'm just saying
it is a lot of information
about a woman that
you didn't even notice, so…
- Can we move past it? Shall we?
- Just saying.
Yeah? Please?
- Yeah? All right, lovely.
- Yeah, fine.
Fine.
Right, we've half an hour
while the trailers are on.
- Let's go.
- What? What you doing?
- We're getting closure.
- Nikki.
Nikki.
No one's wearing costumes.
We look like kids.
No, it's fine.
Maybe leave the broom.
Yeah.
Let's get a drink and dance.
- Everyone's older, Maddy.
- Just act mature.
Like, if something's funny, don't laugh.
Just be like,
"Oh, my God, that's so funny."
Those guys are staring at us.
Don't look! They'll come over.
I really don't think men that age are
gonna want to talk to young girls like us.
Oh, shit.
How's it going? You all right, yeah?
- Yo, what's good?
- Hey.
- Absolute waste of time.
- It's not.
Let's get it over and done with.
Hello there.
- Sorry, mate, bit of a weird one.
- Hello.
We were here earlier, and I don't
suppose you saw a small kid, did you?
- Dressed as a ghost.
- You lost your child?
No. You need to stop saying it like that.
No, not seen anyone,
but I just got here, so…
- Right, well.
- Okay, well, but… Sorry, sorry.
- Sorry to bother you there.
- Hello.
We were here earlier. Did you see
a small child dressed as a ghost?
They were with a tall woman
dressed as a cat.
With big boots on.
No. She…
Well, my wife here
thinks I was checking her out
when I wasn't.
We're trying to clear it up.
What's he saying?
He says that he thinks you're robbing us
and they're very scared.
No, we…
- No, we're gonna go.
- Sorry.
Which aisle was it?
The aisle that you're on, actually.
This is all detergents.
Why would there be a kid on this aisle?
Exactly. Exactly.
- Thank you. Thank you. I like her.
- Come on. Come on.
You can see the chocolate stand
from there. Maybe she was looking at that.
- Maybe.
- Which way was she looking?
I don't know, mate.
She had a sheet on her head.
Can we now leave because we're
gonna miss the beginning of the film?
Jase, why you just admit
that you were lying,
and everyone can get on
with their evening?
You could check that.
- Who's this now?
- Paul.
All right, Paul.
Are you at uni?
No, not yet.
Did you find anywhere to park?
- We got the bus, so no.
- Right.
But you do drive, though?
Like, you could have driven here?
I think if you have to try this hard
to work out how old I am,
it's probably a bad sign.
What?
Yeah, they think they're playing Techno,
but they're playing House.
Techno is faster.
Oh, my God. That's so funny.
I know.
Okay.
This is you coming in.
- Is that the hot woman?
- Well, it's the woman.
Look, I'm an ally to women, right,
but you've got to understand
the difference between a hot woman
and a seven-out-of-ten wearing PVC.
Nikki.
Sorry.
No, you… No, you don't
have to translate. No.
I can't see a kid.
Pause it. Can you pause it?
Can you zoom in?
- Navi.
- No, not on the woman.
That's not good. That's terrible.
Right, see, pause it there.
Problem is, the child is
clearly obscured by the aisle.
- Convenient that. Isn't it?
- But look at my eyeline.
It's quite clearly going down behind the
aisle to the height of a very small child.
Well, well, well.
What a sorry sight this is.
- You want me to play it?
- Play it.
- What're you doing, Paul?
- Sorry.
Okay. All right, now. Now, here we go.
So, the kid should be coming into view
any minute
now.
Sorry, yeah, it does that. Sorry.
This is deranged. Can we go?
Ran out of storage again.
Can't believe you wore a costume.
So cute.
Where's Maddy?
Last I saw,
they'd gone for a dance, but it's cool.
They'll be coming back in a bit.
I was gonna say actually, there's a…
there's an after party if you wanna come.
- It's not far from here.
- Yeah, maybe.
I think I should probably
find Maddy, though.
Did I offend you?
Hi. Hey, sorry, mate.
I thought that was you.
It's Rory.
We met at Izzy's party.
How-How are you doing?
- Oh, yeah. Hi.
- Look, Izzy's…
just over there
if you wanna come and say hi.
- Yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah.
- Yeah? Okay.
Excuse me.
Cheers, mate.
- God, thanks.
- No worries.
- He kept touching me.
- Yeah, it's Techno. It's like a…
like a bat signal, but for dicks.
I've got some friends just through here.
What's your name?
- Princess. Yeah.
- Princess?
You don't hear that name every day.
Well, actually, I guess you probably
do 'cause it's your name.
Yeah, that's true.
- Where are your friends?
- I don't know. Weird. They were…
They were just here.
It's okay.
We can hang out.
I did just rescue you.
Did you drive here?
Maddy?
Maddy?
Maddy?
Hello? Hello?
Nah, it's all right. It's not your fault.
We missed the first half an hour now.
Two people and a horse have already died.
What's the bloody point?
What?
You know what?
I don't care that you looked at her.
Oh, my God.
It's fine to find other people attractive.
- Well, then why are we arguing then?
- Well, because…
When you don't admit it,
it's like you're saying
our relationship is so weak
that it can't take you finding
other people attractive,
like it's small and fragile,
and it's not. It's secure.
It's secure enough for you
to find someone attractive,
and for me to find someone attractive.
- Who did you find attractive? Hey?
- No.
No, I'm just saying you can.
I can. We both can.
- All right. Okay.
- It's fine.
But I'm just-- I'm just so annoyed at you.
- I haven't done anything wrong.
- That is what is so annoying!
I just really wish you looked at her.
Okay.
Just so you know,
I'm extremely confused now.
What do you mean?
Yeah, there is…
a tiny possibility that
there's something that I need to tell you.
Princess.
- I thought you were smart.
- I am smart.
This isn't what a smart person looks like,
- is it?
- Don't shout at me.
If I wanted that,
I would've called Nikki and Jason.
Okay, where's your friend?
She's still inside.
- I can't go back in there.
- How am I supposed to recognize her?
It's supposed to be a mad one.
So cool.
You Princess's friend, yeah?
- Yeah. Yeah. What?
- Yeah? Hey.
Right, sit down the pair of you.
Okay, quick question from me.
- Who is this?
- My mum. The cool one.
Who knows you're here?
No one.
Where are you? You don't know.
How are you gonna get home?
You can't.
You don't leave your friend alone.
I didn't mean to.
- What happened?
- I didn't like those guys, Maddy.
They seemed nice.
Yeah, everyone seems nice now.
We used to know who the sexists were
because they'd pinch your arse
and call you darling.
But now they're smarter, and they
camouflage themselves as feminists,
with their Clairo albums,
and their tote bags,
they think they can put their hands
around you 'cause they wear nail varnish
and make their own matcha!
I'm sorry.
Yeah.
You're in between worlds right now.
Just don't jump to the next one too soon.
Now get up and let's go.
Oh, shit. My broom.
Well, I brought it from home, didn't I?
I left it just inside the door.
She brought it from home.
Go. Go.
Run!
Come on!
Okay, so…
Look, Nik.
If you're gonna break up with me,
can we not do it here?
Can we wait till
after we've left the cinema?
'Cause I love this place,
and that'll ruin it. Okay?
Kerry from work
isn't a woman.
She's a man.
Okay. Well, good for them.
Sorry. I can't believe you were worried
about how I would react to that.
I mean, you know me.
I'm very happy with people
being whoever they wanna be.
No, I mean, she's always been a man--
You know, I understand the issue here.
Actually, we just did
a module on it at college.
Kerry can be a man's name
as well as a woman's.
- They've lucked out there, didn't they?
- Jason.
What?
My colleague, Kerry, is a man.
You assumed he was a woman,
and I just-- I didn't correct you.
And the reason that I didn't correct you…
was because I had a bit of a crush on him.
How much of a crush are we talking about?
Just a tiny, small little, work thing.
Okay.
This is what all this has been about then,
has it? You've been feeling guilty.
You're not gonna ask me
how long it's been going on?
Doesn't sound like anything
has been going on.
- Has it?
- No.
Right.
But I imagined things going on.
It's just nice to, you know,
be this exciting new person to someone,
instead of being furniture.
What sort of furniture
did you think you are?
I don't know.
An armchair?
Supportive but blends into the background.
No, you're not an armchair. No, no way.
No, an armchair requires far too much
of you. You got to sit up straight.
You can't truly relax
in an armchair, can you?
You're a sofa.
- Sofa? Jase.
- Yes, a sofa.
Welcomes everybody.
Completely nonjudgmental.
It's everyone's favorite, the sofa.
What are you then?
Me? Bed.
- A bed?
- Comfort and excitement in equal measure.
Oh, my God.
The ego on you.
This… It doesn't matter now
'cause, you know, I'm over him anyway.
I'm sorry to hear that.
Why? What happened?
Well, he's a singer,
and his songs are just full of clichés.
I'll tell you something,
there is nothing more unattractive
than a man who doesn't understand love.
You not threatened by it?
I'm a little bit threatened, yeah.
Fluorescent lights
But you shine brighter
Office chair throne
Ain't nothing tighter
Spin once slow
Pull me into orbit
World on mute…
Oh, yeah. We're fine.
We are always fine.
- Yeah?
- Yeah.
I'm sorry that we don't have
cleavages for you to look at.
It's fine.
There are always wrists.
I like a nice wrist.
I think that's the saddest thing
I've ever heard in my life.
- You okay?
- Yeah.
Where have you been, though?
I mean, it's okay,
but I've-I've been texting you.
Well, it's just been difficult.
Sorting everything out.
Flat, bank account, stuff.
Right.
The only jobs I can get are, you know…
It's really hard starting again.
I know it's hard.
But I need you to do
the hard thing for a while
because it's been really hard
for me for a long time.
And it's your turn now.
Suki says are we going
to her party on Friday?
- What is she doing?
- Roller skating, then burgers.
Yeah, let's do that.
Nadya. Just…
Okay.
And while I appreciate you getting up,
you have been under this duvet
for a number of hours now.
So, we have, in effect,
just relocated the problem.
Well, without any projects to hide behind,
this, it turns out, is who I am.
And how long will you be this person?
How long will I be myself?
Quite a while, I would think.
This is all my fault.
Yeah, I just wanted to stop
all the crazy schemes,
and tone down your more
annoying tendencies, but m…
but maybe being annoying is
a key part of your personality.
Who's that?
Barbara. She's coming over again.
Okay.
- What?
- Haven't seen that in a while.
It's comfy.
How was the film?
- Yeah. It was good, yeah.
- It was good. Yeah.
Don't worry about it.
How was the party?
Yeah, yeah, it was fine.
Don't worry about it.
- Hello.
- Hello, Barbara.
- Hi.
- You all right?
- You've been home since last night, Babs?
- Yeah.
I like your necklace.
Thanks.
Yeah, okay. We're going upstairs.
- All right, you two. Yeah, yeah.
- Oh, okay.
- Okay, so she--
- Yeah, Barbara's a goth.
- Yeah.
- Brilliant.
I was a hundred percent looking at her.
I know.
God, I hate that.