American Horror Story s13e11 Episode Script

1
[THUNDERCLAP]
I believe you're looking for me.
[THUNDER RUMBLING]
[SCOFFS]
Is this the part where you
torture and interrogate me?
- Quiet, demon boy.
- Madison.
[TENSE MUSIC PLAYING]
Unless you want to hit the high notes.
I bet you'd make a lovely soprano.
- [CHUCKLES]
- Careful.
I'm currently vibrating
at my cuntiest frequency.
[EXCLAIMS]
[GRUNTS]
Go ahead. Try me.
I would win, as you all must know.
But I did not come
here to fight you ladies.
[SIGHS, GRUNTS]
Who are you?
I'm exactly who you think I am.
Well, we don't bargain
with the son of Satan,
so give me one reason not
to destroy you on the spot.
Because I never wanted any of this.
I never asked for it.
Because I will help you save the world.
You need me.
I know everything about him,
about my father, his
weakness, his fears.
And I know this is hard to
believe, but I am on your side.
[MADISON SIGHS]
[BEN SCOFFS]
Continue.
After I accepted the
pact from my old man,
that devil in a wheelchair
[SUSPENSEFUL MUSIC PLAYING]
[BEN] I gained these powers.
And one of them was reading his mind.
[DISTORTED VOICE
WHISPERING INDISTINCTLY]
[GROWLING]
[DISTORTED VOICE, GROWLING CONTINUES]
[DISTORTED VOICE] Witches
[BEN] In what felt like a flash, I
learned everything about the man.
And it bound me and
your Coven together in
ways my father never
could have foreseen.
I learned about everything
that he had done to me.
How he had engineered my
my miserable childhood, my
morbid job, a deadly plane crash.
My whole life, really.
[BREATHING HEAVILY]
And that rage, my fury over
what had been forced upon me
- [KETTLE RATTLING]
- it boiled over.
- [TABLE BANGS]
- [FLAMES WHOOSH]
[BEN] My whole life, I had stayed small.
Holy shit.
- Suddenly I understood.
- [KETTLE WHISTLING]
[BEN] I always had this power.
Just needed somewhere to go.
[WHISTLING CONTINUES]
[BEN] I realized I could
choose a different path,
a different side.
I mean, I could
I could choose a path
forward to stop him.
He didn't ever imagine that I
would reach out to his enemy.
That's how my father underestimated me.
His big mistake.
Cordelia, how can you
even indulge this guy?
We simply cannot trust him.
Look, when a man in triple-ply
cashmere starts to smooth talk,
I tend to give him a chance,
and while I sure love
the fit and the swagger,
I think we're going to
need some references.
Okay.
I can't convince you alone. I get that.
So I went and found the one
person that you might actually trust.
Think of it as a peace offering.
[DISEMBODIED VOICES SHOUTING]
[BEN] I descended into the underworld.
How, I cannot entirely explain.
[PAPA] Dark prince?
In these parts?
I ain't gonna stop ya.
[DAMNED SOUL 1] That's the dark prince.
[DAMNED SOUL 2] Dark prince.
[VOICE ECHOES]
[BEN] And I found your friend
the flame-haired Myrtle Snow.
[GASPS]
[MYSTERIOUS MUSIC PLAYING]
You lie.
The one that you
burned alive, now in hell,
doomed to work forever
at a JCPenney's in Branson, Missouri.
There's no fucking way
Myrtle Snow is roasting in hell.
What did she do?
Um
she took a melon baller to her
fellow witches' eyes, did she not?
Before she killed them.
[CASH REGISTER BEEPING]
- Ladies
- [MYRTLE] Next.
- [CASH REGISTER DINGS]
- [BEN] the devil has his own calculus.
- [MYRTLE] Christ, now it looks terrible.
- [BABY CRYING]
- [MUZAK PLAYING ON SPEAKERS]
- Terrible.
Polyblend is like a curse on the world.
It's worse than leprosy or locusts.
- [INDISTINCT ANNOUNCEMENT ON PA]
- Well, I kinda like it.
No, it's too tight and you look like
a kind of horrible blood sausage,
the bits stuffed into
that polyester casing.
No, I want this, and I
like this headband too.
Oh, no, dear.
I'm sorry, but you could never
pull off Miss La Toya Jackson.
It'll catch the sweat, right?
It's practical.
Fashion should never be
practical or comfortable.
Unless you bleed or can't breathe,
you miss the point
of the art of it entirely.
When I look at you,
I want to kill myself.
And you too.
But let's find you
something coral-colored
to work with those
ruddy rosacea skin tones.
Nope, I'm getting this.
And some clip-on earrings too.
[CHUCKLING] Clip-on? No.
Do you work at some roadside truck stop?
I mean, is-is your name Flo?
Why don't you take my fucking advice?
Honestly?
- You kind of look like a drag queen.
- [GASPS]
Proudly, bitch.
That is the point.
[BEN] A job in this hell is
to be the only one of taste
in a sea of the unfashionably lost.
[BUZZING]
[BEN] To offer
makeovers for all eternity
and never once have her
educated choices considered.
- [MYRTLE] Next.
- [CASH REGISTER DINGS]
- [BABY CONTINUES CRYING]
- [GASPS]
Acid-washed denim.
The early 2000s look is back.
No, it isn't.
Looking like an extra in
the defunct show, The OC.
Wearing True Religion
jeans is never an option.
Why don't you just put on an Ed
Hardy trucker hat and finish me off?
Only Missy Misdemeanor
can pull off Kangol.
I pray
my last death row meal
is merely to inhale
Tom Ford-era Gucci,
and then I want a quick beheading
with the sharpest blade possible.
[PA BEEPS]
[EMPLOYEE] Attention,
shoppers, enjoy our flash sale
I also like tube tops.
I'm gonna try those on.
[BUZZING]
[MUZAK DISTORTS]
- [MYRTLE] Next.
- Myrtle Snow, it's time for your break.
[BABY CRIES, ECHOES]
You could say I'm, uh
the management.
You're my salvation, my respite.
And such beautiful skin.
The light of the world.
Thank God you're here.
Oh, no.
Not God. Not exactly.
[MYSTERIOUS MUSIC PLAYING]
Where are you taking me?
Anywhere you wanna go.
A Rei Kawakubo Comme des
Garçons fashion show, front row,
with Victoria Beckham
at my side to gossip with
and talk shit about everyone.
Make it snappy.
Myrtle told me about you, Cordelia.
About the neglect in your childhood.
She was a surrogate mother to you.
Take her name out of your mouth.
We see right through the devil's tricks.
Trust me.
I am not the devil that you know.
[MYSTERIOUS MUSIC PLAYING]
I'm the devil that you need.
[DOORBELL RINGS]
- Girls.
- Myrtle.
I only have one thing to say.
[ECHOING] Balenciaga!
- [DOOR CLOSES]
- [CHUCKLES]
Oh, my dear Cordelia, come here.
- [WHIMPERS SOFTLY]
- Come here.
- Oh
- [MALLORY WHISPERS] Oh, my God.
[CORDELIA] How can this be?
Is this real?
Yes, dear, it is real.
You can trust him.
And I have returned with great purpose.
To repair and properly accessorize
this wretched planet once and for all.
[LAUGHS]
I've heard so much about you.
- Hi.
- [MYRTLE] Hi.
- This is Coco.
- [MYRTLE] Coco.
[COCO CHUCKLING] Hi.
Myrtle, I've missed you.
- Mallory.
- [MYRTLE MURMURS]
[SNIFFLES]
Dear Cordelia
Let me see. Chanel?
[CORDELIA CHUCKLES]
- [CORDELIA] You look wonderful.
- [MALLORY] I can't believe it.
[CORDELIA] Absolutely wonderful.
[LAUGHING]
Pretty nifty.
[CORDELIA] Myrtle
I believed you, by the way.
What other tricks you got
in your pocket, demon boy?
Did you, uh, like throwing me around?
[WHISPERS] Actually, I did.
[MADISON] If you ask me
later if that was the exact moment
I fell in love with the devil's son,
I would tell you, no way.
But I did fall in love
with him eventually.
["GIRL, INTENTIONS" PLAYING]
[MADISON] Here's the story of
how Satan's spawn and a witch
became history's ultimate it couple.
I don't care to leave a legacy ♪
[MADISON] Honestly, me falling hard
for the son of the world's
biggest son of a bitch is so obvi.
I mean, I've always had a thing for
bad boys with a twinkle in their eye.
Hi, I'm Madison, and my
therapist says to trust the process.
Hi, I'm John.
[MADISON CHUCKLES] Oh.
Cheers.
Um, I'm sorry, but
you're much more creepy in
person than on your Hinge profile.
Your face is slightly bruised.
[CHUCKLES] Like that
Clavicular guy who, you know,
hits his own face with a hammer.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Actually, I do that.
I'm into looksmaxxing.
Oh. God.
It's actually a really
interesting technique
[MADISON] I know, I know,
I have a bad picker. I get it.
If they reeked of trouble, I
literally ran towards them.
Because I could fix them, right?
ancient, sculptural.
[MADISON] Only to retreat in
shame and consider lesbianism.
All my Coven season girls out
there, you get me completely.
Dating over 30 is, like, the worst.
And if you're a spectacular
witch with magical powers,
stunning hair extensions,
and high standards
[SIGHS] nearly impossible.
But, trust, witches are just like
mortal girls. We all want love too.
- Where you heading?
- [MADISON] A quality romance.
Hard to find when you're superior.
- So I dated a lot.
- [IMITATES ENGINE REVVING]
[MADISON] Serial killers,
Netflix soap opera
stars headlining shows
about lame South Carolina pier towns,
macho podcasters with
Turkish hair implants,
even someone with Equinox biceps
from the New York City Mamdani campaign.
I was desperate.
Change, I mean real change,
where we can tax the billionaires
and finally open up those community
Yeah, I'm sorry, I'm gonna
need to get the check, please.
And no, I'm not splitting it.
Wait, you're trying to leave?
Why? I'm so fascinating,
and I'm such a catch.
Really?
Yeah, well, I have
been reading your mind
this entire time because that's my gift.
And you aren't thinking about
me or my high, firm breasts.
You're just thinking about
how cool you are with your, like,
socialist, city-owned grocery stores.
Gross.
Like most millennials,
I feel I lost an entire seven
or eight years of my life
to COVID, to years of political unrest.
I spent my prime "hot, tight bod"
years scrolling through Instagram,
watching a lifetime of stories about
miracle magnesium supplements
instead of living my life
and truly getting out there.
What a waste.
Travis and Taylor. Ben and Jen.
Not Garner.
I sacrificed chickens, did love spells.
Nothing worked.
I could not find a man to love me.
It seemed that love
defied my witchcraft.
A first for me in my entire life.
Finally, it got so bad that I
decided to do it on my own.
I'd freeze my eggs, live
it up, have a family later.
When I was, like, 70 or whatever.
[DOOR OPENS]
Madison Montgomery. An egg harvest?
I knew this day would come.
Well, I guess, lady, it's
time to get in-formation.
Funny. And tragic.
Oh.
[TOOLS CLATTERING]
Ugh.
I hate having those
things anywhere near me.
But I know if anyone's going to
respect my pretty, pretty princess,
it's my favorite F slur.
- Oh
- [LAUGHS]
"Cliterally."
Good news. Your blood
work looks good, though
[MADISON] I bet you didn't know
that witches have our own
warlock gynecologists, did you?
Well, we do.
Mine was a flaming queen
named Warlock Weathersby.
He was a raging homosexual
who chased twinks,
but he was damn good
at the egg retrieval game.
I knew other witches who
swore by his IVF magic.
Only one thing left to do.
Ready for your cooch exam, girlfriend?
Sure, fab, can't wait.
While you're gloving up, entertain
me with your usual sissy tales.
Well, last night, I fell in love
with the most divine,
smooth-skinned Asian gentleman.
Let me guess.
A 22-year-old go-go boy.
How'd you know? Girl.
[CHUCKLES, CLEARS THROAT]
- Now I am going to do an anesthesia spell.
- [EXHALES]
You'll be out, but we will
harvest your scrambled eggs.
[MADISON] In that
moment, I felt such hope.
Maybe someone to love
was finally on my horizon.
It's not fair.
I thought I'd have a
dozen eggs, and you're
you're telling me you
only retrieved one?
Correct. Um, but, honey,
you waited too long.
- [STAMMERS]
- And your otherworldly abundance dried up,
and now not even a
fertility spell can help.
- [CRYING]
- Oh, it happens to a lot of witches.
One minute they're hot,
career-obsessed, supernatural snatches,
and then in a, well,
bewitched blink of an eye,
they turn around and
they're dried-out old hags
with no options except,
uh, revenge spells,
uh, uh, full-moon yoga
retreats, and, uh, cats.
- [CHUCKLES]
- You are a mean, old rice queen.
- [SNIFFLES]
- Oh, honey. I'm sorry.
We can do another
egg harvest in six months
if you really want to keep trying.
But, uh, that's a decision
only you can make, darling.
[MADISON] Three months after
that gut-wrenching day at the OBGYN,
Ben appeared in our lives,
and I didn't know I could
be into anyone so normal,
with a satanic bloodline to boot.
I mean, when you're deep into your 30s,
you really got to give up liking
the guys who are never
gonna like you back.
And there was something
reassuringly Obama-era about this guy
who was so chill, so ordinary.
On the surface, anyway.
You hungry or something?
You psychic or something?
Yes, obviously, but
your stomach is growling.
I was an actress. I
know about starvation.
- Want to get out of here?
- Sure.
But don't do that guy thing
where you want me to choose,
but you don't really want me to choose.
Ooh, I don't know if I can
help it. I'm a New York dago.
- [CHUCKLES]
- I like red sauce, garlic, and a Chianti
[MADISON] A refreshing
change from the jambalaya burps
that clouded my usual
dates in this town.
Well, I hate to break it
to you, but New Orleans
isn't exactly known
for its Italian food.
Who said anything about New Orleans?
[MADISON] And just like that,
we were somewhere else entirely,
even though he was just
figuring out his powers.
- [PEOPLE CHATTERING]
- [VIOLIN PLAYING GENTLE MELODY]
After you.
[MADISON] I mean, like, an
Italian restaurant in actual Italy.
Ah. Buonasera.
[MADISON] It felt like something
out of a Julia Roberts movie.
I love her.
- [PATRONS CHATTERING LOUDLY]
- [VIOLIN CONTINUES]
Grazie, signore.
- [PATRONS CHATTERING LOUDLY]
- [VIOLIN CONTINUES]
Grazie.
[SIGHS]
What?
Nothing.
You held a knife to my crotch.
I think we're past
pretending that you're shy.
Maybe I don't feel comfortable
giving too much away.
At least, not in public.
You know I can read minds too, right?
Intimate sounds nicer.
[CHATTERING STOPS]
[PIANO PLAYING GENTLE MELODY]
[MADISON CHUCKLES]
Good one.
Let me handle the mood.
Hmm. Good lighting is everything
while I'm on the waitlist
for needle and threadwork.
- [CHUCKLES]
- Anyway, much better.
So what's it like going on
dates, looking for a connection
while being the son of Satan?
- Right.
- Yeah.
Yeah, no, I've only been on one
ever since I found out this
whole "devil's bastard" news.
Didn't really end well.
Got a hankering for
some Ben-style cooking.
Ooh! [SCOTTISH ACCENT] Get in my belly.
Not tonight, Ashley.
Actually, not any
night. Can you tell me
What are you even doing here?
[CHUCKLES] Oh.
Right, you're still pissy
about the tattoo thing?
Come on, you gotta let that
go, Mr. Sensitive. [CHUCKLES]
Do not tell me what I can let go.
All right.
[TENSE MUSIC PLAYING]
Well, didn't it turn out
pretty all right for you?
Devil boy.
O-Okay, you're freaking me out.
Hello? [CHUCKLES]
All right. I I don't know this Ben.
Right.
Because you only know the
Ben that you can manipulate.
- Some plaything that you can spy on.
- [SIGHS]
- [CHUCKLES] Yeah, your plaything.
- You need to let this all go.
Spin me around and around
till I'm dizzy with your lies.
Okay, can we calm down for a second?
- No one is spinning you around.
- [SCOFFS]
- Why don't we just call Constance?
- No, no Constance!
Not any of them.
So what was I to you, hmm?
Some target for you?
For trauma dumping, fucking,
all so I could believe
that you cared about me?
- But you were never on my side.
- [OBJECTS RATTLING]
- Never the right side!
- I am on your side.
- No!
- [GASPING]
Now it is my turn to
spin your head around!
[SQUELCHING]
[ELECTRICITY BUZZING]
[PANTING]
[MADISON] Sounds like the
traitorous bitch had it coming.
[BEN] I don't know. Does anyone?
[PIANO MUSIC CONTINUES]
[BOTH CHUCKLE]
It's just I think I
probably went too far.
It's not my finest hour.
Trust me, I've done worse.
I flipped a bus full of frat bros once.
No.
Wow.
Yeah.
[BREATHES DEEPLY]
I bet they deserved it.
Yeah.
Yes, they did.
And thank you.
I try to be a good person.
I do.
My instincts have just
always had other ideas.
It's like there's this
little voice in my head,
and the thing about that voice is
she is a real good time. [CHUCKLES]
Devil on your shoulder.
Yeah. [CHUCKLES]
But it's more than that.
It's like a
like a darkness inside.
You know?
More than I would have liked to.
I think it's great that you
are in touch with yourself.
I mean, I spent years, years
just pushing things down.
Keeping a lid on things.
It's exhausting.
And now, I mean, I'm
just running much hotter
than I'm used to,
but it's sort of, uh
- [CHUCKLES]
- It's invigorating. [CHUCKLES]
Maybe it all just balances out. [LAUGHS]
That's what I keep
telling myself anyways.
I want to be a good person.
It's just not my default
setting, and that's okay.
No, no, no, I don't think that
we should be chasing defaults.
I mean, maybe wanting
to be good is enough.
I I'm not sure that goodness is
some state that you just arrive at.
It's more like a
I think it's a direction
that you choose.
You know, without really
knowing if you're gonna get there.
- Mmm.
- That's what I want.
That's where I wanna go.
[MADISON] Yep, I was
fully living in a rom-com.
He was proper, passionate,
and a Ben Affleck-type in the sack.
Turns out, if you want someone to
worship your pretty, pretty princess,
look no further than
the son of Satan himself.
For the record, you
make a a lovely soprano.
[CHUCKLING] Stop.
- [CHUCKLES]
- You think the whole Coven heard?
I think the whole state of Louisiana.
How on earth?
It's the benefits of a forked tongue.
- [CHUCKLING] Stop it.
- You wanna see it again?
[BOTH LAUGH]
[SIGHS]
Can I ask you something?
Try me.
You said you're connected to his mind.
This Mr. Nas guy.
Who's to say he can't read yours?
I mean, how do you know he's not
gonna show up here and kill all of us?
I don't. [CHUCKLES]
I mean, maybe he could.
I mean, I don't want to freak you out,
but kind of new to the whole, uh
son of Satan thing.
But you're so good at it.
You know the Bible, right?
[MADISON SCOFFS]
- [CHUCKLES]
- Jesus is in the desert.
Forty days, 40 nights,
Satan comes to tempt him.
Is that the torture porn
Jesus movie Mad Max made?
Or the one where the
guy from Pulp Fiction
plays Judas with a Brooklyn accent?
I've seen neither.
The New York Judas one, I
think, but that's not my point.
No, the
the thing is
Jesus is the son of God,
and Satan comes to try and
tempt him into turning
his back on his father.
Jesus is starving.
Forty days. And Satan offers him bread.
He tests his faith.
He offers him dominion
of the whole world.
And Jesus told my dad
- "Fuck you."
- [CHUCKLES]
Now I'm in the mood for toast.
I mean, maybe you're my temptation.
[MADISON SCOFFS]
God sent you to me
so I could feel what's
possible if I deny my own father.
He's tempting me.
To show me what my
father never could give me.
Love.
[CHUCKLES SOFTLY]
That's lovely.
But I'm no angel.
I was literally sent to hell.
Okay, you're a sinner. We all are.
Maybe the world can only be saved
if a few broken people band together.
I mean, you and your Coven
are some fucked-up chicks.
- [LAUGHS]
- You still fight evil.
[MADISON] Hmm.
I mean, that's the side
that I wanna choose.
Your side.
Should we get back to saving the world?
I guess.
["ROAD TO HELL" PLAYING]
[MADISON] All my life I told myself
that someday, my prince would come.
Who knew he would turn out to be
the prince of darkness? [GIGGLES]
Go away for awhile 'Cause you can't ♪
'Cause you can't see this again ♪
Take a break from
your friends If you ever ♪
If you ever wanna see them again ♪
Can you think for
yourself just once? ♪
You're never gonna get back home ♪
Cause you're gonna discover
Ah-ah, alone on the telephone ♪
Don't run away from me, baby ♪
Just go away from me, baby ♪