21 Jump Street s01e09 Episode Script

Hey, hanson, you got to see this.
It's totally amazing.
Yo, blowfish! Hey, blowfish, how's the little woman? Not little.
I discovered this guy.
He's totally amazing.
What do you do? I'm the human blowfish.
Gonna bring back vaudeville.
Will you do it for him? Now? Got to fix the heater.
You fixed the heater last week.
I fix it forever.
I'd be out of work.
That's why you got to develop your natural talents.
Come on, quick, do it before Fuller gets back, okay? Ioki, hoffs Check this out.
What? Okay, now we can't hurt them.
I mean, we got to win, but can't hurt them.
Well, maybe we can hurt them just a little bit.
This is crazy Going to school early to fight.
This is ridiculous.
What? Mr.
"I served 18 months for manslaughter" is worried about a little fight? I didn't ask you to put that in my jacket.
Well, it got put it there so nobody would think you was a wimp which is what you are this morning.
We're the mcquaid brothers.
Yeah! We're rougher, tougher.
We buy better drugs.
Let's buy some better drugs and get out of here already.
Three weeks is getting kind of old.
Today an ounce, tomorrow a kilo.
Step by step.
Yeah, and by about midterms, we can bust the president of Colombia.
The college or the country? Hey, there they are, pancho.
You take the little one, okay? The little one? Look Let me lay out the rules Hey, look out! What's going on? Looking for a little spare change.
We're gonna by one of those metal detectors, too.
Try looking in your homeroom instead.
Relax, fans.
They started it.
No one thought you were gonna show.
We're the mcquaid brothers.
We had to show.
Hello! Okay, everybody out.
You're big boys.
Wait till later.
If you cross your legs and lean over you might make it through math class.
Phew! All of a sudden there's a reason to get here for first period.
Fifteen hundred bucks.
Elly: You're gonna buy us a condo.
A gram, then an eight-track, then an ounce What next? How about a half a key? A half a key? Yeah, we can handle a half a key.
Great.
I, for one, am very impressed.
These guys are not small time.
Okay, as long as you guys can handle that kind of weight What do you say we make it a whole key? A key? Yeah, as in 2.
2 pounds.
Or haven't you guys studied the metric system? I have.
Is that too tough for you guys to handle? Well Tell you what, I don't want you guys to feel like we're cutting you out.
But if you take us straight to your source I think we can manage a finder's fee Say, ten percent? Ten? Ten.
That's Twenty-five hundred.
For doing nothing.
Think about it.
Take your time.
No, take an hour.
Let us know.
Are you crazy? I had to go.
A whole key? Why did you up us to a key? 'Cause he looked like he was gonna be able to handle half of one by himself.
And we'd have never gotten up the ladder.
It was a bluff.
He looked like he had to go to the bathroom.
We were in the bathroom.
Are you guys on? Yeah, except Sonny Crockett here upped us to a whole key and 25 grand.
That's fine.
Fine? Fine? Danny, get me the a.
D.
A.
On that Jefferson thing.
Look, we'll have it packaged in $50s, all right? I want you to demand a public location, not too secluded.
Burger joint or something would be good.
You're gonna get us 25 grand? You got a problem with your hearing, penhall? No.
All right, now, backup will be there.
They'll just stumble onto you and make the bust.
You'll be juvied out the next day.
And then finally the mcquaid brothers will be history.
Ha! Ha! Woman: Captain Fuller, line two.
Yeah, guys, my office.
No, then you're gonna stay right where you are at west union until the indictments on Elly, birch, and their supplier are handed down.
That should be in about a week or two.
Diane, how are you? To what do we owe this pleasure? One more college.
I know I should make up my mind.
May I just xerox my letter of recommendation? Mr.
Harris already let me read it anyhow.
Those files aren't really open to students.
But you don't look too dangerous.
How's your sister? Leslie's great.
She can't wait till she's up here at the high school.
And your dad? We missed him last week at the p.
T.
A.
Meeting.
Oh, that was my fault.
It was his birthday so we took him out to dinner.
Guys.
So you're the big Wheeler-dealers.
All right.
Fine.
What are you giving these guys? Five percent finder's fee.
That's a lie.
But that's okay.
I don't care.
You got something for us? I never carry anything more than my car keys.
They've got something for you.
Aren't you going to count it? Nah.
If it's not all there, I'll kill you.
So why should I count it? Birch: There are cops here.
Gibb: So what? They're here for lunch like us.
Hey, babe.
The usual.
You boys supposed to be off-campus this time of day? We're honor roll students, sir.
We get free time at lunch.
Nice try.
My kids went to west union.
There is no off-campus.
Okay, guys, come on, back to school.
Come on, guys.
Up, up, up.
You don't look like you're going back to school.
No, sir, I've already finished my educational process.
Whoa.
You bring your lunch here? What you got in the sack? What? You got a warrant? A warrant? I got probable cause to open your cranium just looking at you, kid.
I heard there were cops everywhere? Thirty cops and drug dogs and a whole s.
W.
A.
T.
Team.
A s.
W.
A.
T.
Team? They had to.
Tommy mcquaid always carries a gun.
He killed someone once.
He shot a cop? I don't know.
You know how they say, "when the smoke cleared?" You know how many bullets you have to fire for there to be smoke like that? Mcquaids: Hello! What's the matter? Ain't you guys ever heard of bail? Watch, they'll give us detention for being late.
But, Mr.
Harris, we couldn't come to class We was in jail.
Yeah! Two more weeks at school with nothing to do but be at school.
Yeah, but you're forgetting We're the mcquaid brothers! Heh! Hanson: Go away.
Give me your jell-o.
This is a waste of two highly-trained moderately paid city employees.
We're doing nothing but waiting around to be witnesses.
I hate doing nothing.
Yeah, but it's fun.
Hey! Hi.
Does your momma know you're here? You know you could get diseases and stuff talking to us? Yeah, well, I'm going to go get some more tartar sauce.
All right, Diane.
What do you want? Can I just talk to you for a minute? Yeah, what do you want? The lowdown on the big bust? Gonna write an editorial for the school paper? You really did the things people say you did.
I know that.
What are they saying? I know that they're true.
Why don't you hit the road, Diane? You're finding it out, aren't you? What? That being a lowlife works.
Especially with them girl scout types you go for.
You want to get dogged in this world you got to be a dog.
Think about it.
That's my brother's seat.
I need to know if it's true that you killed someone.
Let's say it is.
Which is even more reason for you not to be here.
Would you do it again? I don't know.
I suppose if I had to.
Why? What's up? Would you do it for money? Diane, I don't think you want to do this.
I have $1,700 saved.
All I want to know is if you'll kill someone.
You've done it before.
Diane, what's up? Somebody give you a hard time in study hall? Give it a couple of days.
It will pass.
I have $1,700 saved.
It's all I have.
I want to give it to you if you'll kill my father.
I can bring the money in tomorrow.
Fuller: Until the d.
A.
Is convinced he can turn Elly and birch gibb is out on bail.
This guy gibb is serious.
Three felony priors including an assault with a deadly.
You be real careful with your cover out there.
If he finds out who you are he will kill you.
And that generates massive paperwork.
So don't let it happen.
Freeze! Don't even blink! Doug, it's me, tom.
It must be late.
Can I talk to you? I've really got to talk to somebody.
What time is it? It's almost four.
You want something? No, no.
Why didn't you call? You wouldn't have let me in.
I know.
Why didn't you call? Look, Doug, can I talk? Yeah, I'm up.
You're here.
Let's talk.
No, no, I mean, can I really talk to you Like off the record? Yeah, sure, I mean, we're friends.
That's right.
You're my friend.
I can trust you.
You wouldn't turn me in, promise? What happened? What did you do? All right.
You know Diane Nelson? Mm-hmm.
She, uh She, uh "She, uh" What? She offered me $1,700 to murder her father.
What? She asked you to participate in a special circumstances class "a" felony murder? Of her father? I'm telling Fuller! No, wait a second, you said you were my friend.
And now I'm implicated.
All right.
All you do is sign the report.
It's dated.
It's all on paper.
You're covered.
You give it to me.
I stick it in my back pocket and forget to turn it in.
It's my fault.
I don't like it.
What's not to like? You did everything by the book.
It's my fault.
Fine, but I still don't like it.
What are you guys doing here in the middle of the day? We're the mcquaid brothers, coach We can skip class to keep up with our paperwork.
Heh! The assignment did not end with the bust.
I'm not thrilled with the attitude here.
You are to be in school on time Or on time for the mcquaid brothers, heh From now on.
We were No buts.
We understand each other? Yes, sir.
This is nuts, man.
Tommy, I've got something for you if you want it.
We can't do it here.
Come on.
Mrs.
braverman lets me use this room to study if I have an off period.
I guess being good has its advantages, huh? Here.
Put that away.
You said you'd do it.
I never said I'd do it.
I didn't even say I'd think about doing it.
Maybe I will, and maybe I won't.
You can give me the money when the job is done, okay? Okay.
Diane, I got to know why I'm doing this.
Why does it matter? I'm paying you.
Because it interests me, Diane.
You want me to whack the guy.
I kind of like the idea of knowing why.
Now what is it? Is it money? Is he a hard guy? Does he beat you? You got bruises on those pretty little arms of yours? Just take the money.
Look, nothing you could say would surprise me.
It doesn't matter.
Either you're gonna do it or you won't.
It doesn't matter.
Maybe you're not as tough as they say you are.
Maybe.
Maybe I don't like the idea of going into this thing blind.
I'm sorry.
I'm sorry It's the only way.
I'll let you know.
Keep an eye on that money.
There are a lot of shady characters around here.
So, who is this? Just a girl.
Look, I'm not generally available for other people's paperwork, hanson.
What's all the mystery? Nothing it's just that I've been busy working on a case.
Could I have that? You're not working on a case, hanson.
You were on a case.
You already made the bust.
Lay off, Harry.
What did you get for me? There wasn't really much We got a family disturbance once but it's not surprising there's nothing's there.
It's not? I mean, it's not hard to quash something like this when you have rank.
Rank? Clarence Nelson.
Her father's Clarence Nelson, man.
Head of the administrative branch.
He's a cop.
You didn't know? Holy cow.
Who is she? Just a girl.
Excuse me.
I'm here to pick up the Nelson files.
I got no paperwork on it.
Who requested it? Captain Nelson requested it.
He requested his own file? I got to have some kind of okay.
Are you going to call him? Don't bother.
Just go sign on for foot patrol.
Look, officer Raskin This man lives for paperwork.
He runs administrative.
If you don't have the release, it ain't 'cause he didn't send it, it's because you lost it.
But, hey, that's all right.
Make the call.
You're gonna see sections of downtown you never dreamed of.
Hey, whoa, where you going? Paper gets lost around here all the time.
Come on.
Come on.
Yeah? Can I trust you? I don't know.
I don't know you that well yet.
Maybe you can maybe you can't.
Your call.
Look, this girl asked me to kill her father.
Okay, so I did the wrong thing by not turning her in but I didn't know what to do.
I'm new at this.
You've been doing this for 20 years but I'm new.
This is a class "a" felony.
This is a special circumstances request for murder which in this state means she can go to the chair for this.
You sat on this report? It's my fault.
My partner diligently completed Sure, sure.
Penhall, get in here! He had no knowledge of my action.
"A" don't ever give me "my partner did this; I did that.
" That's junior league.
"B" this was a felony.
You don't hold back felonies.
Is that clear? Yes, sir.
Is everything in this report? Yes, sir.
No.
What more? Diane's father is Clarence Nelson.
Captain Clarence Nelson, head of administrative.
This just gets better and better.
This afternoon, I scammed the clerk at records into letting me see his personal files.
How did you do that? I presented myself as captain Nelson's assistant.
Look, in addition to several family disturbances that were quashed this man's got a file like Swiss cheese.
The implication seems to be one of illegal activities, sir.
Uh-huh.
And how would you classify your activities of this afternoon, officer hanson? All right, hanson, "sirs" and procedures aside do you think there's a case here? Yes, sir, I do think there's a case.
Maybe I've got clearance to pull the rest of his files.
Or I'll cash in a couple of favors downtown.
All right, hanson.
You go back, you turn down this offer of assassinating a police captain.
You give me the report.
I'll sit on it.
That way, I'm responsible.
It's the other one that carries the gun, right? We got to do this, right? This must be the time, right? Sit down.
I know, I know Got to go see the principal.
Perils of being a mcquaid.
Where's mcquaid number two? Good question.
Diane, I'm gonna have to turn you down.
Would your brother do it? Not a chance.
Is it the money? If I got more money could you do it? I could maybe borrow some from someone or sell something.
Diane, I just ain't gonna do it, all right? It ain't happening.
And you're not equipped to do it, so why don't you just leave it alone? You do it! You said you'd do it.
You said you'd do it.
Look, Diane Just go away.
Go away.
I don't know why we let you back in here after your arrest, Douglas.
Doug: It's a little custom called innocent until proven guilty.
Perhaps, but I'm beginning to think that our halls would be safer without you in them.
Halls, huh? I was just washing my hands when Moses and Max mutant here decided to redecorate the bathroom.
I was an innocent bystander who got in the way of their artistic frenzy.
I find that hard to believe.
He attacked us without warning.
I attacked the two of you? What am I, stupid? Enough! A week suspension for each of you and two weeks for you.
Is that justice or arithmetic? There's two of them so they get a week apiece? How would you like three? That's not what I had in mind.
That's what you got.
Wasn't like I asked him to suspend me.
It just happened.
Only reason why it got out of hand is 'cause I had to take on both of them and win.
And where were you anyhow? I was a little busy telling Diane I couldn't murder her father tonight.
Oh, that.
Well, this tapped out my favors downtown for a while.
This is oblique stuff, guys.
I mean, it's not a case.
We're talking between the lines here.
Four years ago, Nelson's wife died.
There were a series of domestic disturbances that followed All quietly suppressed.
An appearance in family court that got canceled.
The family court date was about truancy.
Not long after the death of her mother Diane ran away and lived with her aunt for a while.
She's back with her father now.
There was a confidential recommendation for counseling of some sort.
Even I couldn't get to that file.
I don't get it.
What does all that mean? I think I know.
I think we're looking at sexual molestation.
And this guy's a cop.
Maybe you should whack him.
Maybe I'll do it for you.
Now, wait a minute.
We could be wrong.
Maybe we're misreading all this.
If we're wrong, we're wrong, and I'll get a reprimand.
But if not, you need to get that girl out of there.
And to do that, you need to get her to file charges.
I don't think that's gonna happen, coach.
I mean, even the time that I spent with her Well, guess we write this one off.
And move on to another case.
Wait a minute.
I'll get it done.
This time if she holds back she's going to hate me when I'm through but I'll get it done.
Hi.
Hi.
You don't have any groceries.
No, I followed you here.
I want to talk to you.
You haven't changed your mind.
No.
Diane, I'm not who you think I am.
I was at west union to buy drugs.
I know that.
No, I'm a cop.
Really, I'm a cop.
What do you want? I want to talk to you about your father.
All this was to get to my father? You came to me.
You asked me to kill him.
We pulled his records.
We understand what's going on.
Nothing's going on.
It was all a mistake.
Diane, look at me.
I want to help you.
But you've got to help me.
I don't want your help anymore.
Am I in trouble? You didn't do anything.
How can I be in trouble? Diane, your father He touches you, doesn't he? You wanted to kill him because he's sexually assaulting you.
He probably has been for years, maybe since your mother died maybe before.
You never knew my mother.
How can you talk about my mother? What do you want? I want you to file charges.
It's the only way I can help you.
It's the only way I can get you out of there.
He would just get me back.
I've tried everything.
Nobody will believe me.
I even tried calling the cops in the beginning twice.
It didn't work.
It won't work this time.
This time's different.
I'm not some beat cop who just shows up.
I believe you.
Come on.
I'm going to be late.
I have to go home.
I won't file charges.
Don't bother me again, okay? Get you something? No.
Yeah, glass of water.
Ice water, please.
Waitress: One ice water.
You don't drink? I drink when I drink.
I'm mad when I'm mad.
I don't drink not to be mad.
Yeah? Yeah.
Make that a draft.
She won't file charges.
She's terrified of her father and not without good reason.
She's called before and dad shut it up.
Every one of those secret files is when she tried to call out and we wouldn't help her.
Did you lean on her hard? You didn't just ask nice.
I didn't just ask nice.
I broke that girl down in the produce section.
She admitted what was up.
She cried.
She turned me down.
And then she finished her shopping.
Captain, we got to do something.
How can she stay in that house? She's got a way out, but she won't take it.
We can get her out of the house but it won't be a pretty scene.
Kidnapping's still an offense but don't think it didn't cross my mind.
We can have her arrested for the solicitation of murder rap.
She'll be booked, processed and held in a juvenile facility.
Then if she's being molested we can get the solicitation charge dropped because of mitigating circumstances.
You want to put her in juvenile holding? Come on, captain, she's the victim here.
I said it wouldn't be pretty, but it will get her out of there.
Once she's out of that environment, dad isn't there every day.
It's a step in the right direction.
It's the only one I can see.
Let's do it ourselves.
I don't want some face in a uniform to walk in there and bust her.
Come on, you've got rank, I've got a badge.
Let me walk in there and take her out myself.
That's not exactly regulation.
Come on.
All right, I can have you an arrest warrant by dawn.
We're enough on the line already.
Don't screw this up.
Thanks, man.
Can I help you? Yeah, I'd like to see Diane Nelson, please.
Father: Who is it, Leslie? Some boy who wants to see Diane, daddy.
Thank you.
Diane, there's a boy here for you.
What do you want? Why don't you do what you need to be doing in the kitchen.
What do you want? Go away! Get your little sister out of here now.
Do it! Leslie.
Go over to the Hendersons.
Stay there.
Don't come out for anyone, not even dad till I come get you.
Why? Just do it, okay? Diane, you can't stay here.
I'm gonna place you under arrest for the solicitation of murder of your father.
Now, you're not gonna end up in jail.
It's just a way to get you out.
No! I can't.
I won't.
It's not your choice.
If I walk out, two uniform cops are gonna come in here and walk you out in cuffs.
I can't.
What's going on here? He's trying to make me go with him, daddy.
Don't let him make me go.
Diane's not going anywhere.
I'm officer tom hanson, sir.
Captain Nelson, your daughter is under arrest for the solicitation of your murder which we believe to be the result of an ongoing pattern of sexual abuse.
And is currently under investigation.
I have a warrant for her arrest.
I'd like to see your badge.
I'm gonna have to ask you to stay there, sir.
Diane, come on.
Let's go.
Diane, you're not going anywhere.
Stand back! Take your hands off my daughter! I said, stand back! Take out a gun in my house?! I'm a cop! You all right? I shot him.
I'm sorry.
I had no choice.
Are you okay? Yeah.
Get an ambulance! Who screwed up? How is she? They've given her a sedative, and they're going to take her down to the hospital.
She said she hired you to kill her dad.
Officer hanson was here to execute an arrest for that crime.
The arrest of a very troubled little girl.
Looks like he tried to live up to his contract.
That's out of line.
Tench: Captain Withheld paperwork cops shooting cops, murder contracts The press is going to have a field day.
I, however, officially have no opinion yet.
Officer hanson, I'm going to have to ask you for your gun and for your badge.
I gave it to another officer in there.
May I have your badge, please? The rest of the I.
A.
D.
is waiting to question you downtown.
No cuffs.
It's procedure, captain.
No cuffs, detective.
That's my procedure.
Haven't we had enough of your procedure for one day, captain? Panzano, Dixon.
It's all right.
Officer hanson, thank you.
It's okay.
Tench: Would you escort this gentleman down to I.
A.
D.
, please.
Okay, well, keep me posted.
Nelson's going to live.
He ain't gonna say anything for three or four days but he's gonna live.
Am I under arrest? No, you're under investigation.
Is there anything you want to add to your statement? No.
It's quite a document.
You like this part of the job, don't you? Now, this young lady came in from out of the blue.
She asked you to murder her father who turned out to be a cop.
Yes, that's the way it happened.
I'm not arguing with you.
So far your story backs up.
I think you went in there to do exactly what you said.
I think you took an unorthodox approach but that's up to the review board.
So maybe we can leave Find a place that serves better coffee.
Let me lay this out for you, captain Fuller.
We have a chief administrative cop who your man shot for whatever reasons who, apparently, on a long-term basis was sexually abusing his eldest daughter.
Now, that's page one for at least a week.
You're going to get tried in the press and you're going to lose.
Is my father dead? He's going to be all right.
I'm glad, I guess.
Am I going to jail? No, I don't think you're gonna go to jail.
Look, my real name is tom hanson.
I can't tell you how sorry I am.
I made you do it.
You didn't make anybody do anything.
Feel all right? Just tired, I guess.
Must be those pills.
I just wanted to make sure you're okay.
I can go.
No, stay.
You kept coming back.
Even though you wouldn't let me hire you.
Even then you kept coming back.
I was worried about you, Diane.
I know.
Are you going to go to jail? Well, some of that could depend on you.
Look, I know it's going to be very hard.
But a lot of people are going to come here and want to talk to you about what happened.
Some of them are gonna be doctors.
Some are gonna be police officers.
I don't want to talk about what happened.
I just want it to go away.
Nobody can make you talk about anything you don't want to talk about.
Good.
Then it's fine.
My father molested me! You really want me to talk about this? I think a lot of people could be helped from it.
No one's going to like me.
No one's ever going to like me again.
I'm disgusting.
They're yours again for now.
And some good news.
It doesn't look as if Diane's gonna have to face the solicitation of murder charge.
The d.
A.
Has stated that if it can be shown that the act was "precipitated by her beleaguered emotional state" he won't file.
What if he can't? She's under 18.
Any judge who wants to be reelected between now and the second coming would let her walk with probation.
I really hate her father for what he did.
It's a sickness.
Doesn't even deserve your hate.
Maybe your pity.
Maybe.
You ever shot anybody? Yeah.
I never shot anybody before.
I know.
How do you feel? I don't know.
I guess I'm just waiting for it to hit me.
Let it when it does.
See somebody.
Take some time.
Okay? Yeah.
What's gonna happen to Diane? My guess is she'll elect to be her sister's guardian.
Police department's going to have to cough up some change.
She'll get therapy.
She's young.
She's got a good chance, hanson.
Get your badge back? Yeah.
Good, because Elly and birch are dealing again.
I don't think this is the time.
Are you a cop? Yeah.
Well, now is the time.
Man's right, hanson.
Go earn your check.
Heh! Sorry I didn't knock.
Hanson: We heard you guys were back.
Just took a little break.
That's all.
Yeah the shop's open, man.
These guys never learn.
Max: We heard you guys were back.
These guys never learn.
Guys We've got some bad news.
Everybody up against the wall.
You're police? Yeah.
Birch: Hey, you can't do that.
Yeah.
Uh-huh.
Now, that's more like it.
I feel silly doing this.
Don't.
It's a walk along the beach.
I mean with you.
I want to spend some time with you, Diane.
Nobody made me.
Okay.
Are you allowed to do this? No.
Now I really feel silly.
Forget it.
How's stuff? I'm okay, I guess.
Know what they tell me? They tell me it's not like I have leukemia or I'm going to die.
There were times when I wanted to die.
It's funny.
It was almost harder on my sister.
I kind of knew it was coming.
Supposedly, the worst thing someone can do is not tell anybody.
I can understand your holding back.
I was going to get out anyhow.
I was going to go away to college.
Then I realized I'd be leaving my sister.
I miss the part of him that was a father.
There were good parts to him, too.
Everybody seems to forget that now.
You should be able to keep those parts, shouldn't you? What he's got is a disease.
It's not like it can't be dealt with.
You never really fooled me, tom hanson.
Tommy mcquaid, tough guy? You were under there.
Thank you.
Oh, no, thank you.
You don't bowl, do you?