800 Words (2015) s02e11 Episode Script

Season 2, Episode 11

1 (UPBEAT MUSIC) (ALARM) (SIGHS) But I feel this could be different if I was with you Arlo! Wake up - first day of term.
Morning.
Good morning.
Arlo! School! Yes, it is.
OK, you get your breakfast, I'll grab your lunch.
Sorry, do you want a cup of tea, cup of coffee? Ah, coffee, but I can get it.
No, no, you sit down.
There's no food.
There's plenty.
Is there a lid for this lunch box, or is it the one without the lid? You can just use a plastic bag.
And kill some dolphins while you're at it.
Oh, wow, a high school dropout with a social conscious.
We have a lid! Now, coffee.
George, don't worry about me.
No, it's no trouble.
Do we have any maple syrup? What for? Pancakes.
Pancakes? Could you do that somewhere else? But the kitchen is where you make pancakes.
Hey, I can just get lunch at school.
And I just need you to sign this.
Hey! Oh! There's no milk.
Did you use all the milk? Hey, Dad, have you seen the time? Yes, alright.
I can clean that up if you want to go.
Shay can do it - she's got nothing better to do.
Here you go.
I'm going back to bed.
Is that your plan for the day? Not all day.
Possibly.
Dad, come on.
It's not too late to enrol! If you've changed your mind.
Have a nice day, nerdy boy.
You, too, dreg of society.
Help yourself to everything.
I'm just going to head to work.
OK, well see you later.
This could be different if I was with you If I was with you I want this as long as we're two, but I feel this could be different If I was with you 2x11 If I was with you.
VOICEOVER: They say he who expects nothing is never disappointed.
But sometimes, all your expectations can be exceeded.
You wake up and discover that you're the happiest you've been Dad.
Yep? Why are you smiling? Was I? Oh, I was just writing my column in my head.
OK.
(UPBEAT MUSIC) WOMAN: Hi.
Welcome.
Haere Mai.
Hi.
Haere Mai.
Welcome.
Hi.
Haere Mai, Brandon.
Hi.
Haere Mai.
Hi.
Wait, why are you coming in? Say hello to the new principal.
Haere Mai, Arlo.
Hi, Miss Dennis.
Just want to wish you luck on your first day.
Not that you need it, of course.
See you later, Dad.
Can't believe this is his last year of high school.
Almost seems like last week he started kindy.
Oh, was he top of the class there, too? Well, don't want to brag, but (LAUGHS) Haere Mai, Lindsey.
Jarrod, lovely to have you back.
Do I have to be in the same class as him? Well, you didn't pass last year, Lindsey, so you have to repeat.
We did talk about this.
Still sucks.
Good luck.
Thanks.
Off you go, you have a great day.
Doubt it.
Haere Mai, Billy.
Hi, ma'am.
Billy not like school? He likes learning, he just rather learn things they don't actually teach.
Like? Um the migratory pattern of the Bar-tailed godwit.
That's a bird flies from Alaska to New Zealand every year and back.
Why? Oh you'd have to ask Billy.
He's a star shaped peg in a hexagonal hole, as I keep having to remind them.
There is no news, George.
But, no news is good news.
Except when you're trying to produce a newspaper.
They still haven't filled the pothole outside the museum.
What if I do a profile piece on the new high school principal? How she's feeling, what are her expectations for the year.
Yeah, you fill your boots and I'll let you know if any real news comes along.
Someone put a road cone on top of the big pine tree by the beach access.
I think I'll work from home.
Best place for it.
Well, how did it get up there, ay? You calling it a day already, mate? I'm working from home.
What about you? Oh, yeah, you know.
Not really.
Something wrong? Just feeling a bit, um Oh, your girlfriend's back at work.
That's exactly right, mate.
Well, you're gonna miss her, ay.
What? Miss her? Mate, that's the opposite of what I'm gonna do.
What, are you two not good? No, she's coiled up like an Eastern Brown.
Every time I try to help her she just strikes! I just saw her then and she seems fine.
Yeah, well was she greeting every kid by name? Yes, she was actually.
Yeah, well let me tell you, she's not doing that in her sleep.
It's work, work, work, eat, work, work, work, sleep.
Work, work work Is this Tracy? Yeah.
I just had my annual Billy chat this year with her.
And? She's convinced that Gateway is the appropriate path for him.
What's Gateway? It means he's in with the numpties.
Ah.
Did you just say "numpties"? My grandfather used to call me and my brother that all the time.
It means "stupid".
No, it's a term of endearment.
Isn't it? (CHUCKLES) It's a label, George, a label that says you're not academic, and you're never going to uni.
Isn't that determined by how many credits you get? Yeah, the right amount of credits in the right subjects.
And Gateway - they're not the right subjects, George.
It's like work experience with a fancy title.
How to write a CV and so forth.
Well, that's good, isn't it? It's quite practical, actually.
Some parents love it.
My dreams for Billy were a bit higher than working in a shop like his mother.
Well the school system here isn't simple, is it? No.
Apparently my son is though.
Oh, I'm sure Tracey doesn't think that.
Sure.
Anyway, I better get going.
Great.
Great.
So my girlfriend's a stressed-out workaholic, and now the most hated woman in the world.
(PHONE RINGS) Oh, I'm sure she's not.
Tracy.
George, why on earth did you agree to it? Agree to what? To Arlo throwing his life away.
I don't remember signing this.
But it is your signature? It is.
Oh, I signed it this morning.
Yeah, what is it? You don't know? I, um, I didn't read it.
You didn't read it? Why don't you tell your father what he's consented to, Arlo.
Um, me changing subjects.
Not exactly changing subjects.
Tell him what you've dropped.
Um, maths with stats and physics and chemistry, but I've picked up Arlo has moved himself into the STAR programme.
Oh, that sounds good.
So what's the problem? His marks not good enough? STAR stands for Secondary Tertiary Alignment Resource.
Yeah, which is where you can do work placement and get credited for it.
Work placement? Like an apprenticeship.
I didn't think you could do apprenticeships in medicine or science, can you? Well, I don't want to do medicine or science.
For the STAR programme, the school selects kids who are eligible.
And I need to make this very clear.
I was not involved in this.
Penny in the office when Arlo approached her during the holidays, she put his name down without consulting me and the programme accepted him and you signed the damn form and now here we are.
Well this says Gateway.
Are you telling me Arlo's going to be a numpty? We don't use that term, George, it's offensive.
OK, can I go to class now? No! Arlo, the thing is, you're marks put you in the top 3% of the whole country.
You could be earning credits towards a degree this year.
Yeah, but I don't need a degree for what I want to do.
Which is what? I want to be a chef.
And I wanna own my own restaurant one day.
Which is why I need to do food tech and hospitality so I can start That's not gonna happen.
You're going to do the subjects we talked about last year.
End of discussion.
Well, I don't want to.
And I don't think our form class has started.
What just happened here? You signed the damn form, George.
(UPBEAT MUSIC) VOICEOVER: They say he who expects nothing is never disappointed.
Maybe they're right.
Whoever the heck they are.
(DISTANT LAUGHTER) (LAUGHTER AND CHATTER) You may have taken a wrong turn.
No.
This is where I'm meant to be.
You come to give us crap, or something? Maybe he's come to be the teacher.
Yeah, right.
What are you doing here? Same as you.
Is there no teacher? It usually takes them a couple of weeks to find a teacher for the numpties.
You'd know.
Yeah, third year numpty and counting, yo.
Fourth.
Oh, no, I don't count the last year because, you know, I was like never here, so.
Are you here because I ended up here? No.
No, I'm here because I want a career in hospitality.
Yeah, right.
Shouldn't someone go to the office and let them know that we're on our own? No, 'cause we're good here actually.
(PHONE BEEPS) Oh! (LAUGHTER) Get off, teabag! You take your life in your hands joining the numpties.
Hey, is your, um Is your sister coming back to school? No.
Oh, yeah, no, totally get it.
Like I'm only here 'cause my dad wanted me to school, otherwise I have to work at the petrol station full-time, so.
Yeah.
You sure you want to be a numpty? VOICEOVER: In fact, Alexander Pope, the 18th century poet said "Blessed is he who expects nothing, for he is never disappointed.
" But did this Alexander Pope guy have kids? Did he not expect great things for them and from them? I mean, it's only natural, isn't it? (DISTANT TALKING) (LOUD MUSIC) It was yummy.
Hi, Dad.
I bought milk.
Hey, George! Isn't it a bit late for breakfast? We're calling it brunch.
What do you actually doing, Shay? Making pancakes.
Don't worry, I'll clean up after.
I mean, with your day.
And then with tomorrow, and the day after that, and the day after that? I mean, is it too much to expect at least one of my kids will actually do something with their life? I'm sorry, I'm having a Arlo's become a numpty.
What, a school numpty? No.
No way.
Yeah, he's quit his actual classes to do Gateway because now he wants to have a career in hospitality.
Wow! That's a bit unexpected.
You're telling me.
But, you know, Gateway is awesome for kids that aren't academic.
But of course, Arlo's completely academic, which makes this an odd decision.
Yeah.
I mean, what do they actually do? They could spend the whole year watering pot plants for all I know.
Actually, there was this numpty who had a pretty big career in pot plants, if you know what I'm No.
OK, that's a story for another time.
Cool.
Pancake, George? Look, when you've finished your brunch, could you go and do something? I don't know, go out and stop climate change? Anything.
Actually, I've got something that I could be working on at the gallery.
Since you're so worried you raised a numpty and a beach bum.
Tidy up before you leave.
(SOFT MUSIC) (DOOR CLOSES) (PHONE RINGS) Hi.
Hey.
Did Arly get to school OK? He got to school, yes.
So, you're free to meet me for a coffee or lunch later? Sure.
Is everything OK, George? I'll tell you when I see you.
Just come on in whenever you're taking a break.
I will.
VOICEOVER: Here's what you expect.
That your kids will always love you, always need you, and always do what you thought they were going to do.
VOICEOVER: Maybe.
Maybe that's stupid.
Did you know in Food Tech we get credits for knife maintenance? Well, knives are a chef's most valuable tool.
(MOCKS) "Knives are a chef's most valuable tool.
" You're the tool.
We should let Miss Dennis know the no-form teach showed up.
Think about it, dummy.
If we don't have a teacher, then we can do whatever we want.
Well, yeah, during form class.
Yeah? Which is 15 minutes at the beginning of the day before we have to go to all our other classes.
So? What's your point? Isn't it kind of insulting to the numpties that everyone else gets a form teacher except us? Yeah, just 'cause we're crap students.
We are still students though.
We're not crap students.
In fact, it could be argued that we're the bright ones, 'cause when it comes to getting a job, we'll be the ones with the skills, literally.
Yeah.
Numpties rule.
Just saying.
Yeah, Jud, shut up.
Don't tell me to shut up just 'cause you've got the hots for him.
I do not.
Shut up.
Actually, Lindsey, Arlo has a girlfriend.
Still seeing that Emma girl? She's in Stafford, but we talk every day.
Nice.
Dork love.
Works for me.
(UPBEAT MUSIC) (SIGHS) Don't, I want to finish this.
No, finish it later.
I'm working.
This isn't just a hobby for me you know.
I never said it was.
Dad thinks it is.
Hey, your dad is a writer.
He can't criticise you for wanting to be an artist.
Yeah, but he gets paid to write, so it's a real job.
OK, hey.
It's really good, except maybe Maybe what? It's too small.
You're kidding me.
No.
No, no, no.
OK, I have an idea.
How this can be a real job, too.
How cool would that be right there covering the whole wall? Like a mural.
Well, the world can be pretty beige at times.
And it would brighten things up a bit.
Exactly.
Go for it.
You serious? I live in a house full of velvet Elvis hangings.
This is probably the closest to a masterpiece I'll ever get.
Oh, my god, yes.
As long as it doesn't cost me anything though, the wall is yours.
Thanks, wow.
OK.
How am I gonna pay for this? I mean, paints, rollers, ladders.
Yeah, yeah, yeah, details.
Don't worry, it'll be sweet.
A real job means I get paid, not what I pay.
You get that, right? Yeah.
OK.
OK, let's do some numbers and we'll see what we're up against.
He's obviously been planning this for a while.
Since he started working here? No.
It has its roots elsewhere.
Hm, a few weeks ago he did mention hospitality as a career, and I said to him, "Look, dude, if you're serious about this, "here's what you need to do.
" You told Arlo to take Gateway? No! I told him to ditch school completely.
But Arlo didn't ditch school, he's still there.
That's a good thing.
And now he's a numpty, which is apparently an offensive term around these parts.
To some of us, yes, because numpty means the same as stupid.
But that was OK, because we got out and worked and made money instead of wasting our time studying, so the rest of them can suck on that.
Hannah, could you grab us some flat whites, please? Hm.
Sorry.
Don't worry about her, she's fine.
Arlo's the important one here.
He knew I'd hate the idea, which is why he lied and deceived me.
It's not who he is.
My son doesn't lie to me.
God, he's too bright, he's got too much going on to waste his life to a bloody restaurant.
I might just grab us some water.
Oh, shit.
Sorry, Fiona, that's not what I meant.
I know.
It's just that what I imagined for my kids wasn't I don't know.
I mean, it's one of the reasons you have kids, right? So they can be a better version of you.
I don't know, George.
I might be out of my depth there.
Sorry.
I'm gonna nip this in the bud.
I am very sorry if I was rude about the Gateway students this morning.
We just don't call them numpties, because it has connotations, and really is an excellent programme.
Yeah, I'm sure it is.
But not for my son.
Do you agree? Look, George, Weld District High School has never had what you call an outstanding, or even acceptable pass rate when it comes to NCEA.
So when a student as bright as Arlo comes along I know.
And I'm sorry for signing the form - that didn't help matters.
Well, he seemed pretty determined, so.
Yes, well, so am I.
I'm gonna fix this, and I just wanted you to know that by tomorrow, we will both have our star pupil back.
(PHONE RINGS) Fiona, hi.
I have decided what you need.
Dinner for two, my house.
I just picked up this really delicious steak which I I'm sorry.
Oh, you're not able to? I need to have dinner with Arlo and Shay to sort this school thing out.
Of course you do.
God, sorry, I didn't even think Do you want me to come over and cook for you? Thanks, but I think it should probably just be us.
I mean, I'm gonna put my foot down and it could get ugly.
Oh, that doesn't sound good.
Well, good luck.
Thanks.
Talk soon.
VOICEOVER: You can sit around expecting something to happen all you want.
But when it comes down to it, the only way to guarantee it happening is to stop expecting and start doing.
I don't know about this.
Let's go! Let's do it.
Can we help you? Yes, um Looking to buy, are we? Young couple, first home? (CHUCKLES) No.
But But But we have an opportunity for you.
OK, so I'm painting the side of the Super Store with one of my artworks.
A Shay Turner original.
Except I need a sponsor.
Trust me, her paintings are gonna be worth a lot of money one day.
Before or after she's dead? It's very colourful, I like it.
So you'll sponsor me? No, sorry.
If I said yes to everyone coming in here and asking for money, I'd We gave money to the Blind Dog people.
Guide Dog people - that's a good cause.
And the surf lifesavers, remember? Yes, they were selling little pins.
So now you want us to give you money for your graffiti.
This is a community project showcasing the work of one of Weld's young artists.
And consider this an opportunity to make up for past grievances.
By me giving you money.
Come on.
You got a budget? Yeah.
Whack a McNamara Realty logo on it somewhere, you got yourselves a deal.
Are you serious? I believe in second chances.
Right.
Yep.
He means you.
You really want to give us money.
Anything that brightens up this town - I'm willing to back that horse.
Thank you so much! I have an idea for a mural.
No, Susie, there are limits.
Hey.
So you're never gonna believe this.
Tell me while you're setting the table.
So, Ike had this brilliant idea that my work shouldn't be limited to a canvas.
Just us tonight - set it for three.
Oh.
Is this a compulsory family dinner I smell about Arlo? OK, anyway, so we went down to the Super Store and pitched this idea to Brenda, and she was in.
And Big Mac is even paying me to do it.
Arlo, get back here.
Got stuff to do.
What, a 1,000 word essay on the best deep fryer for hot chips? Or is a maths assignment on the best way to divide up the contents of a tip jar? You always say sarcasm is the lowest form of wit.
And I don't really want to talk about anything right now.
Fine.
Fine.
But we will talk about it at dinner.
I'm not really hungry.
CFD, Arlo? (SLAM) (PHONE RINGS) Yes, Gloria.
Did you do the profile piece on Tracy? No, Tracy and I had other things to discuss.
Good, because I've got an actual story for you.
Something's happened, George.
Brace yourself.
The Golden Seahorse-Shoe is closing down.
The Chinese place? Yep.
Because of its strangely incomprehensible name? Mainly due to the continuously underwhelming food, but I don't know the name helped.
It's a play on words.
Horse-shoe's being lucky, Weld being by the sea where seahorses live, hence, Seahorse-Shoe.
And this is our big breaking news? Some dodgy restaurant is closing down? Well, you didn't know until I told you.
So it was news to you and it will be news to our readers, George.
Yes, well thank you, Gloria, for the heads-up, but I gotta go.
It's the male seahorse that carries and gives birth to the young.
Did you know that? No go? Yeah, nah, it's not happenin'.
Ah.
Should've stayed in bed.
Now you're talking.
Tell Tracy to write herself a sick note an join ya.
Oh, yeah, good luck with that.
I have to practically make an appointment just to see her now that she's Principal Dennis.
Must be hard, eh? You tell me about it.
This new job, Hannah, it's getting all of it.
There's nothing left for me.
I meant for her, not for you.
Oh.
Yeah, George was in today having a fit because Tracy let Arlo join the numpties.
And you know, from what I hear at work, most of the parents only complain about the school.
What, to Tracy? Sometimes.
But mainly behind her back.
Yuk.
Who'd want to be a principal, eh? Well, she would.
She was looking forward to it.
Yeah.
Now she's probably looking forward to getting home to her bloke.
So make sure you treat her nice, eh? Yeah.
(GENTLE MUSIC) (DOOR CLOSES) Why is it so dark in here? Oh.
(GASPS) Oh, wow! Welcome home, beautiful.
Oh, my god, you have no idea how much I need this.
It has been one hell of a day.
Well then, make yourself comfy, and let me give you a foot rub.
Seriously? Yes.
Seriously.
Alright.
Oh, that is amazing.
It's good, yeah? This conversation that I had today with the chairman of the board, was hideous! Kept calling me "love".
I gotta get some allies on that board.
That is heaven.
Oh, after this, dinner, then I'm going to run you a bath and you aren't even going to think about work.
Oh I have to, Woody.
I was planning to work through dinner.
Eat while I read this lot.
I gotta sort out some KPis for the teaching staff.
I mean, honestly, the parents that I've had to deal with today, seriously.
Yeah, I get it.
I get it.
I'm so sorry.
No, it's fine.
Do you mind if I just clear this? Billy wants to know if he can practice his knife sharpening.
It's for school.
It's fine by me, just ask Norman in the kitchen.
This morning, it was a disaster that he didn't get up in Gateway, and now he can't wait to go to school tomorrow.
That's good.
Arlo's got them al inspired.
Wants to do hospo' like his best mate.
If only George were as pleased.
Oh, he's not? (CHUCKLES) That's funny.
How? This morning he was defending Gateway.
It's different when it's your own kid though, right? I wouldn't know.
The Turners are having a family dinner, and I wasn't invited.
And I know that I shouldn't feel upset, but You do.
I get that.
It can't be easy for George dealing with all the stuff without Laura.
Do you think that she was the one that did all of the school stuff? It's usually the mums, we are stroppier.
But this family dinner thing sounds like a calm and sensible way to sort it out.
Hopefully.
You deliberately deceived me! You would've have signed the form if you knew what it was! You're damn right I wouldn't have.
Maybe we could lower the voices Giving permission to throw your life away? That's not what I'm doing! Well, I disagree! I'm not him, Dad! Not who? You know.
You think because he's a screw-up, all chefs are screw-ups and that is not even My brother has nothing to do with it.
Well then why are you going so crazy? Because your mum and I had plans for you.
How do you think she would've felt if she knew what No.
No way! You do not tell me what she would've thought, because I know.
She would've wanted me to be happy and to do what makes me happy.
She wouldn't be sitting there telling (SOFT MUSIC) (DOOR SLAMS) (GENTLE MUSIC) Morning.
Hey.
Arlo up? And away.
What, to school already? I believe fleeing was the plan.
Dad, does it really matter that he wants to do something that he loves? And your personal experience with further education makes you an expert how exactly, Shay? Right.
Your children are tragic disappointments, complete failures, and terrible people.
I didn't mean it like that.
(PHONE RINGS) Tracy.
How'd we go? Getting staunched? I may have made things worse.
No "may" about it.
I see.
I'm not sure what to do next.
Leave it to me.
Time for the big guns.
(UPBEAT MUSIC) At it already? Thanks to McNamara Realty.
What's happening here? We're making the world a little less beige, Sean.
Not without a permit they're not.
Get down here, please.
You had better be joking.
Stay right where you are.
About needing a permit to paint public property? I don't joke about things like that, Brenda.
Come on, down you come.
This is my car park! On land that's leased from the council.
This about the toilet roll holder my mother gave us, isn't it? No, it's not.
It's a toilet roll holder, Sean, get over it.
It's shaped like a ballerina.
You leave my artist alone, or I'll get her to make a matching seat cover.
The council will not be threatened.
I'm calling her now.
You'll need to come to council office, fill out a proper form.
OK, and then can we paint? Then a delegated council rep will either approve it, or not.
And who's the delegated council rep? I am.
(CHATTER) Are you the teacher? Of course not, I'm the Principal.
Has the reliever not I'm working on it.
Then there's the state of the building.
And the furniture is falling to pieces.
Arlo, can you come with me, please? Oh, no, I just mean we shouldn't be treated like second class citizens just because It's not something that you have to worry about any more.
I'm taking you out of Gateway.
Oh, what? Why? The school selects eligible students and you are not eligible.
You can't do this.
My office.
Let's go.
No.
Oh! Move it, or this whole class is on detention for the rest of the week.
Hang on, now that's not fair.
Serious? That sucks.
It was him, it wasn't us.
Ki kaha, Arlo.
That means, "Stay strong, Arlo".
Yeah, do it, boy.
Keep cool, man.
Morning! Hey.
Oh, you're working.
I should've called you.
I'm trying to.
The only news story in town is not actually a news story.
And then there's my column.
I don't know how you think of things to write about every week.
I'm doing expectations, and how the kids you make grow up and shatter them.
Family dinner didn't work? Well Shay getting into trouble is to be expected.
You know, girls can be tricky, whereas Arlo, I just never expected.
Yes, Laura was the one that used to deal with all this stuff? Why? Because she was the woman? She was a lawyer working all the time.
She certainly wasn't doing the school drop-offs, the teacher interviews, the endless parent fundraising committees.
I get it.
Sorry.
Lately I just feel like I can't say anything right to you.
There is no subtext here, Fiona.
This isn't about me missing Laura, or not coping.
I just don't want my son wasting his life in hospitality.
OK.
Then there's no subtext here, either, George.
I've been trying so hard to support you, to not offend you, but you know what? Bugger it.
I'm in hospitality and I love it.
And your son was in his element in the boat club over summer.
(PHONE RINGS) It's Tracy.
You better answer it.
Can I call you later? Just do what you need to do, George.
Tracy.
Please tell me the big guns worked.
You can't force me to study something I don't want to.
Gateway is no longer an option for you.
What, 'cause I'm not eligible? Did you make her do this? Do what? You can't just trick your way into getting what you want, Arlo.
Not without properly obtained parental consent.
No Gateway for you.
And I support the principal wholeheartedly in that.
I'm 17.
I can actually leave school.
You wouldn't.
He wouldn't.
I can and I will.
I do the course I want, or I drop out all together.
Oh, so now you're blackmailing us.
Let's call it an ultimatum.
Let's call it I'm standing you down for two days.
Effective immediately.
Fine.
(DOOR SLAMS) (UPBEAT MUSIC) It's packed up, mate.
Oh! Great.
Oh! Board tossing! (LAUGHS) What's up? I can't say.
Does it involve my missus? George? It does! It does! Oh She's the most hated woman in Weld.
Nobody hates Tracy.
And I know the problem is my own, but let's just say I I don't think she's entirely helped matters.
I'm sorry.
And it's only her second day.
Sounds like a girl needs some stress relief.
The type only a boyfriend can provide.
Well, I would, except she's too busy.
OK.
Yeah, I could suggest that we put aside some time to, you know.
Put aside some time? What? Oh-ho.
How unsexy is that? Well, what am I supposed to do, Hannah? What just rock up to her office, sweep everything off the desk, and what just But this is an artwork for the community.
It's also an advertisement, therefore needs a permit.
No, it's not.
Well, in that case, remove the McNamara Realty logo.
But then they won't pay for the paint.
Yeah, or that cherry picker.
Such are the struggles of the modern artist.
But rules, young people, are rules.
Petty fascist.
I heard that because I've got both my ears.
Unlike Van Gogh and all those other artists you sort look up to.
Alright, no arguments.
What are you doing here? I am taking you to lunch.
Woody, I can't, I've got a numpty rebellion on my hands.
OK, well then I'm taking you for a walk.
Woody, I can't just leave school any time I want.
OK then I'm taking you.
On that desk right now.
What! Are you insane? If there's a lock on that door, 'cause if there's not, that could be awkward.
Is this all just a big joke to you? What? I am working 24/7 being the witch.
I gotta stand people down.
And all I all I want more than anything in this world is to just go and lie on my favourite beach in the sand OK, Trace, Trace, babe, babe.
Hey, it's alright.
I'm gonna pick you up after work, I'm gonna take you to your favourite nudie beach You don't get it - I can't Not anymore.
Because it's too cold? Because I'm the principal.
Right.
Principals don't go to nudist beaches.
Um Just Can you please just go? Yeah.
(GENTLE MUSIC) (SOFT MUSIC) Hi, is your dad in? Ah, at work.
Sorry.
No, it's fine, I just left my glasses.
How come you're not at school? (SIGHS) I got stood down.
Yikes.
Is this about Gateway? I'm pretty sure Tracy only cares about your NCEA pass rates.
We didn't have NCEA when I was at school.
Just school C's - school certificate.
How'd you learn to do that? Watching Norman at the boat club.
You know, there's more than one way to skin a possum, Arlo.
We actually like possums where I come from.
Look, I get I'm not a parent, I'm especially not your parent, and every time I open my mouth I seem to get it all wrong, so you'd think I'd learn.
But, can I give you a suggestion? Sure.
I don't know what your dad's problem is, with what you've chosen to do.
It involves family history between Dad and his brother.
Long time bad blood.
OK.
Well, anyway, is there any way that you could compromise on this? Just meet him somewhere in the middle? Because in my experience, to get a win-win situation, generally both parties have to lose something.
You can tell me to butt out now.
No, I hear you.
Perfect.
Thanks.
The local Chinese restaurant, the Golden Seahorse-Shoe, is closing down as its owners Debbie and Gary Fong are returning to their home town of Hamilton.
Hardly a surprise - their sweet and sour pork was neither one nor the other.
And it's a total non-story, but it's the best I've got.
Mind you, Arlo could've done his apprenticeship there.
Not ready to joke about it yet.
Oh, come on, George, why are you so surprised Arlo wants to be a chef? Your whole family are foodies.
Is this about your brother? That accusation has been levelled with some validity.
Arlo is nothing - nothing like Terry.
Well, Terry wasn't like Terry 'till he fell in with the hospitality crowd.
Yes, he was and you know it.
Terry just happened to find his spiritual home in the world of drink, drugs, crazy women, late nights and cooking.
How is he, by the way? He must be relatively clean by now, 'cause you can't get into any of his restaurants for love or money.
Well, I have no idea.
I haven't actually spoken to him since the funeral.
I see.
Still not great then.
I gotta go, so give Arlo a big hug and a kiss from me.
And George, remember, he's a good boy.
Yep.
So, this is the great artwork that's also a job? I thought you weren't listening when I told you that.
I'm a parent - we can multi-task.
How's it going? Not well.
Sean from the council is making it impossible.
Petty bureaucracy, George.
You should write an editorial about it.
Beats what I wrote today.
I'll give you a lift home.
Bye.
Yep.
So, are you gonna do something about it? The wall? Do you care? I know it's not a proper job, and my career isn't as important as Arlo's, but to me it is.
Is that what you really think? You do.
Shay, I sit in front of a blank screen putting words on it, hoping that people will actually read them and I call that a job.
OK, here's the thing.
(ENGINE SWITCHED OFF) I was the arty one and Laura the sensible lawyer, and then you two came along.
Arlo, swatty, brainy - your mother's son.
And then you your father's daughter.
So, you're saying I'm dumb like you.
I have absolute belief, Shay, that whatever you do you'll be brilliant at it.
And if it is art, you will be a great artist.
Even if you never sell a painting and I have to support you for the rest of your life.
(GENTLE MUSIC) Thank you, Dad.
So how come you don't cut Arlo the same slack? Because that's different.
Not really.
I'm sorry about today.
No, don't apologise.
It's cool.
They say be careful what you wish for.
Um, turns out being the boss is not how I thought it would be.
Yeah, well, in my experience, nothing ever is.
So, I got you a present.
Here.
It's the nudie beach jigsaw.
Well, it's a beach that looks a lot like it.
Ay, it's just a beach.
(LAUGHS) This is so sweet and thoughtful.
You like it? And when will I ever get the time? If you wanna use this table for paperwork, then now would be good.
I'll leave you to it.
I'll see you at dinner time? So, you gonna do anything about that? Well, based on my experience of the past few days, the best thing I can do is keep my mouth shut.
(UPBEAT MUSIC) Oh, oh, oh, oh Oh.
Oh, my god! I'm, I'm so sorry.
Don't worry, these things happen.
What was it? Curried sausages with pineapple.
I got the recipe from Mike.
Can we rescue it? Do we want to? Rude.
Grab some paper towels.
But, what about dinner? We have hardly anything left, because 'cause like no one has been shopping this week.
Well, we could do Puttanesca.
Yeah, we do have tin tomatoes, and olives and capers.
Is that the one with the little fish.
Anchovies.
Shay and we have anchovies.
I like the poody-thingy-one.
BOTH: Puttanesca.
And it won't take long.
I'll get the pasta, you do the sauce.
Do we have any chilli peppers? In the planter.
Oh, I'll go.
I say we had a lucky escape.
I'd say we did.
(SOFT MUSIC) So, I've been thinking about school.
And as well as Gateway, I can do some level three scholarship subjects.
Scholarship.
Yeah, I can work them around my core subjects.
I'm sure Miss Dennis would be into it.
I'm sure she would.
Fiona thought that chemistry might be useful.
In case I ever wanted to be, as she put it, "one of the chefs that does weird science stuff in the kitchen.
" Did she? Yeah and with English, I could enough credits to go to uni.
If I wanted to.
Sounds like a plan.
So I can do Gateway? Can I stop you? (GENTLE MUSIC) Thank you, Dad.
Now look I know it was your mother that said she wanted you to be happy, but I do, too.
I really do.
I know.
Come here.
Let's create some magic.
Hang on.
Hey.
Chinese place is closed down for good.
Did you know about this? News to me, Woody.
Crazy.
Hey, babe.
I had to get fish and chips, 'cause the Golden Seahorse-Shh oe.
Hey there.
You wanna do the sky? Too right.
Oi! You know the rules.
Right.
(UPBEAT MUSIC) It's no excuse, but the Arlo thing, it really hurt.
My little boy acting like I was his enemy.
I'm not gonna say anything, 'cause I don't know what to say.
We-we-we're good now.
Arlo's decided to do some uni courses.
But you knew that already.
I wasn't interfering, I promise.
But you got us there and I am very grateful.
Done an amazing job with those kids, George.
And Arlo's going to make you proud, I know it.
So do I.
There's dinner at our place if you're interested.
Hm, I was just gonna pick up some Chinese takeaway.
Oh, dear, because I have some very sad news about the Golden Seahorse-Shoe.
VOICEOVER: The best thing you can do with big expectations is let them go.
Not exactly what I had in mind when I became Principal, but for the time being, I will be your form teacher.
And the first order of business is getting you lot some decent furniture.
(CHEERS) Because if all our expectations were met every day .
.
how boring would life be? The unexpected - now that's what makes life interesting.
So, bring it on.
Hi, Terry, it's me.
No, no reason.
Just called to see how my little brother's going.
Any arrests, fares.
Stints in rehab? (LAUGHS) .

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