American Horror Story s03e06 Episode Script

The Axeman Cometh

AXEMAN: Esteemed Mortal: [TYPEWRITER BELL RINGS THEN CLACKING] They have never caught me, and they never will.
They have never seen me for I am invisible even as the ether which surrounds your earth.
[CAR HORN HONKS AND AXEMAN WHISTLING] I am not a human being, but a spirit and fell demon from hottest hell.
[AXEMAN CONTINUES WHISTLING] I am what you Orleanians call the Axeman.
When I see fit, I shall come again and claim other victims.
I alone know whom they shall be.
I shall leave no clue except my bloody ax.
Undoubtedly, you Orleanians think of me as a most horrible murderer which I am.
Charles? AXEMAN: But I could be much worse if I wanted to.
[WOMAN GASPS] At will, I could slay thousands of your best citizens for I am in close relationship with the angel of death.
Now, to be exact, at 12:15 earthly time MILLIE: "Earthly time AXEMAN: on next Tuesday night MILLIE: on next Tuesday night I'm going to pass over New Orleans.
In my infinite mercy, I am going to make a little proposition to the people.
Here it is.
I am very fond of jazz music and I swear by all the devils in the nether regions that every person shall be spared in whose house a jazz band is in full swing by the time I have just mentioned.
" This is an outrage.
This madman is holding our city hostage to his twisted whim.
Millie, do you think playing the Victrola will suffice? Come Tuesday evening, a jazz ensemble in New Orleans will be more precious than the Hope diamond.
Choose jazz songs from my collection of phonographs.
Why should we do anything to appease this Axeman? Because he kills women with an ax.
Do I have to remind you? He says, "One thing's certain and that is some of those persons who do not jazz it on Tuesday night will get the ax.
" His prose could use refinement, but we get the point.
If we don't play jazz music Tuesday night-- We're inviting an attack.
It could not be more clear, sister.
The real question is, what are we to do? Ladies, we have been docile too long.
We are powerful, even though none of you have yet to believe it.
Not only are we descendants of Salem, but we are suffragettes.
We're on the verge of our greatest victory, giving us the equal right to vote.
If we embody our feminine might intelligence with grace strength with an iron will no man can make us cower in our home.
GWEN: I'm off in a half hour, Joe.
Can you walk me home? You scared of the Axeman? GWEN: Everyone is scared.
It's Tuesday night.
He's gonna kill somebody.
Well, he's not gonna lay a finger on you.
Rumor has it he's got a thing for jazz and you've got, uh, rhythm in your soul, baby.
I made my intentions clear to the world.
Yes, just as expected.
You have no one to blame but yourself.
That reading was for you.
They had bunk beds and slept eight to a room.
Now, notice anything? Yeah.
Luke's not here.
His mom keeps slamming the door on me.
Nan, stay with me.
Look at the pictures.
ZOE: Our numbers have gone down every year for a century straight.
Witches are dying.
In Salem, there were hundreds of us.
Now there's three.
Used to be four, until Madison went missing or dead.
And no one in charge has done shit.
We can go to Fiona.
Last I checked, she was setting witches on fire.
Okay, Madison wants us to find her.
And we can't afford to lose a single witch if we wanna survive.
From now on, we watch each other's backs.
Look, I've been taking care of myself for a really long time.
Not sure I need some white girl sorority sisters to cover my ass.
And what is this green shit? It's not a sorority.
It's a coven.
And this is absinthe, drink of the divine, which we are.
Where'd you find the spirit board? More like it found me.
Do you know what these things do? ZOE: Contact the dead.
You don't know shit.
Spirit boards have two stages: contact and release.
I saw my grandma use one once.
She thought it was cool too till a bad spirit came, burned her house to the ground, took half her face off with it.
There's three of us.
You want to find Madison? Witch up.
So, what do we do? QUEENIE: Ask the questions.
Be polite.
[SIGHS] Are we alone? [GASPS] Did you die here? Were you murdered? Yes.
Who killed you? "You did.
" Madison, is this you? [ALL GASP] Who are you? "Axeman.
" Wait, stop.
Stop, stop! If survival is so important to you, you better find out who you're talking to.
WOMAN [ON PA]: Oncology.
Paging palliative services, extension 3609.
MAN: It's all bullshit.
Punch a clock.
Scrimp and save? And for what? I'm taking my sick leave in Vegas.
Time to play.
FIONA: I never had the gift of mind-reading before.
Is it the medication? WOMAN 1: It took her so long to find the right man.
Lord, please.
Don't let me spoil my baby's special clay.
Just let me walk down the aisle.
WOMAN 2: Nothing was ever good enough.
WOMAN 1: I swear Heavenly Father, that very night WOMAN 2: I picked him apart every chance I got.
WOMAN 1: my soul is yours to keep.
WOMAN 2: And here he is, week after week, holding my hand, cleaning up my vomit.
[GRUNTS] Miss Geode? You haven't finished your treatment yet.
I gotta get out of here.
I can't stand it.
It's so noisy.
That'll go away soon.
I put a sedative in your IV.
You're doing great, you're almost finished.
No, don't patronize me.
I never wanted to be here.
Please take a seat and finish your treatment? [FIONA PANTING] My daughter needs me as she's never needed me before.
I'm doing this for her.
Not for me, you understand? If I do everything you people tell me to I'll beat this thing, right? We've chosen a very aggressive form of treatment and we always hope for the best.
When am I gonna lose my hair? You may not.
Everyone responds differently to medication.
[GROANS] I'm just not I'm just not ready to go quite yet.
I want one more great love affair in my life.
Now I think what I really want is just to belong to somebody.
It's not too late for that, is it? DUNPHY: No.
My mom met someone on eHarmony, they just went on a cruise to Nova Scotia.
[EKG BEEPING] You're gonna make it to your daughter's wedding so you should go out and buy yourself a great dress.
Blow the bank on it.
Is there anyone that doesn't have a fan site? NAN: I don't.
Did you find anything new? ZOE: The Axeman killed eight people, scared the crap out of the city never got caught.
Listen to this.
"if women will not dance to the sound of my ax I shall make them dance with the other.
" You know a saxophone is called an ax? So he chopped women up because they wouldn't be his groupies? Plus men who protected them.
We never got to ask about Madison.
A spirit will say anything to get released.
They mess with you.
Is that why he said we killed him? NAN: No.
He thinks we're them.
ZOE: "Class of 1919.
" The same year the Axeman disappeared.
"This jazz killer has killed long enough.
This city is done trembling.
Tonight it ends.
" Witches killed the Axeman.
If he knows where Madison is, we got to make contact.
No way I'm helping you release the Axeman.
Nan? I'm out.
[SCOFFS] You left your lives and came all the way across the country just to puss out now? If this is all the fight we have left in us at the end of our race, witches deserve to die.
Where's Madison? Tell me and I'll give you what you want.
I know what you like.
I can give it to you.
Don't you want release? A.
I- C.
[GRUNTS] [COUGHS] [GASPING] [MUFFLED SCREAMING] [DOOR OPENS] She made it up the stairs on her own.
Of course.
She's tough.
She's a survivor.
She is right here.
Why are there roses in here? Why, I thought you might enjoy them.
They're the very last of your heirlooms.
Roses pull in love and romance.
That's not what I'm looking for right now.
I need chrysanthemums.
All kinds of them, for strength and protection.
Well, doctor said, uh, bed rest for at least a week.
Hmm? [CORDELIA GASPING THEN WOMAN MOANING] Who is she? Who is the redhead? Whoa, whoa, baby.
I don't know what you're talking about.
Enough bullshit.
Anything else you wanna tell me now? Because I will see it sooner or later.
I had to go blind to see things about you I couldn't see before.
A bad cosmic joke.
It's a different kind of clarity.
An absolute clarity I've never had.
The images almost vibrate with light.
Thank Christ she's finally got your number.
She's high as a kite.
You know what they gave her? I'm high, all right, but it's not the drugs.
And rest assured, you will be accountable for every single betrayal no matter how deep you think your secrets are buried.
Now get out of here.
Get out! Baby.
Why, you're my heart.
I'd get out while you still can, jughead.
[DOOR SLAMS] I wanted to sever his arms and throw him out the window.
I had to stop myself.
You've been given the sight.
It comes in bits and pieces.
It's the greatest gift to have and the hardest one to live with.
Let me help, honey.
[MYRTLE SCREAMING] Why didn't you tell me? What? What? What did you see? Auntie Myrtle.
I wanted to tell you, Delia, but you were in so much pain, and I didn't wanna add to it.
Burned at the stake.
For what she did to you, yes.
That cannot be.
I'm sorry you had to find out this way.
I think it's best if I let you be alone for a while.
I'll ask Delphine to come and check on you.
[DOOR OPENS THEN CLOSES] [CAR DRIVING AWAY] Fiona's leaving in a taxi.
All right, you twisted, tea-serving necrophiliac.
It's time to fess up.
You killed Madison.
What's he thinking? He's not afraid of children.
Ha, ha.
Really? Yeah.
We all know exactly how tough he is.
[GASPS] [MUFFLED SCREAM] [GRUNTING] Here's how this works, asshole.
We ask the questions you think the answers, she reads your mind.
[HISSES] [SKIN FRYING] [WHIMPERING] [CHUCKLING] Fiona's not here to help you now, riffraff.
Best be straight.
You killed Madison, didn't you? SPALDING: Yes.
Why? SPALDING: I'm a man of uniquely developed appetites.
Was she your first? SPALDING: Yes.
I had to have her.
Madison Montgomery, she was so beautiful.
The moment we met, I knew that only by sliding myself into her cold, stiff, unyielding mound would I ever feel like a real man again.
His first.
SPALDING: Ask yourselves: What will you tough little witches do now? Turn me in to the authorities, exposing the coven, bringing us all to ruin? I think you're smarter than that.
What's he saying? That we can't do shit.
I can.
We'll wait till he wakes up to kill him.
I want him to feel it.
We're not going to kill him.
I'm not sure he really killed Madison.
He admitted it.
I read his mind.
He grew up in a house full of witches.
And he knows how to keep secrets.
Bet he's learned a trick or two.
So if he didn't kill her, who did? [MISTY HUMMING] You like my swamp water, don't you? Gotta have patience.
Won't be long now.
[MISTY GASPS] Oh, my Lord.
It's you.
What are you doing here? Where have you been? You look like you been rode hard and put up wet.
My daddy used to say that.
You need a bath.
[STEVIE NICKS & DON HENLEY'S "LEATHER AND LACE" PLAYING] You smell like a pack of polecats.
[GRUNTING] Shatter with words MISTY: Hey.
[GRUNTING] Oh, for chrissake, Kyle.
It's just me.
Come on.
When you walked into my house All clean.
Come on.
My city or mountains No! Kyle, it's okay.
[SCREAMING] Hey! You stop that! Stop that! You don't wanna piss me off.
I could be your only friend.
Hey! [KYLE WAILING] What is wrong with you? Okay-- Aah! No, no, no.
[MUSIC STOPS] [MISTY WAILS] Why would you do that? Why--? You-- [MISTY WHIMPERING] You're just a big old monster.
Oh, my God.
[SOBBING] MISTY: Get him out of here.
He broke Stevie.
I'm taking you both out of here.
I need your help.
[CHATTERING] We have a problem.
It's okay.
You're okay.
He likes you.
You two belong together.
Not likely.
He murdered his mother.
What can you do? [SNIFFS] I can help you dig a hole.
She's already rotting.
And plus, she's missing an arm.
l have it I can sew it back on her like I did with Kyle.
Have you seen his scar? You're not so hot with a needle and thread.
We'll find a soft spot.
You have the power of resurgence.
You have to bring her back.
Give me some of that mud.
Need your help.
Too much death inside her.
Put your hands on her stomach and push.
[GASPS] Keep pushing.
You risk an awful lot coming here, you know that.
You didn't give me much choice.
An acid attack? Was that to speed things along? You just made my job more complicated.
You think I did that? I look like the Taliban to you? If I wanted to blind your little wifey, I wouldn't have to leave my room.
Well, something's happened.
She's acquired some kind of second sight.
She's starting to see things.
We have to do something.
"We," mon cher? I believe I already did.
I thought I'd hired me a professional witch hunter.
Coming here in the light of day.
"We got a problem.
" I got a problem.
Six years in that house and for what? Access.
You know that, said you wanted more than the witches at the academy.
You said you wanted all Salem descendants.
That's what I've been giving you.
I'm really glad you decided to come and see us, Kaylee.
Well, to be honest, I mostly wanted to see Bourbon Street, eat at Emeril's restaurant.
This other stuff, I don't know.
This place, I'm not really sure it's for me.
This isn't a nunnery.
It's not a jail.
It's a haven where you can learn about who and what you are.
What do you think I am? I don't think you're an arsonist.
Which is what you've been charged with.
But not convicted.
Not yet.
Why don't you tell me about the last fire? KAYLEE: You said that you loved me.
I changed my mind.
I can't marry you.
I'm sorry.
KAYLEE: But why? Will you just give me one goddamn reason? There's something not right about you, okay? You make my friends squirm.
My mother says if I married you, I would regret it as long as I live, okay? And I think she's right.
I'm sorry, Kaylee.
[CARTER GASPS] [SCREAMING] I don't really like to talk about this.
CORDELIA: You have genuine power.
Nothing to be ashamed of, but it is something you need to learn to control.
Wouldn't you like to be surrounded by people with similar gifts? Truth be told, Mrs.
Foxx, I really don't wanna be powerful.
I just wanna find a good husband and have three kids.
I think I have a really good shot.
I work out and I play fantasy football.
Nine Salem descendants in three years.
Five I'd never find without Delia's research.
Maybe we should take you off the payroll, put her on it.
Sounds like she doing all the work.
This is what we agreed to.
What we agreed to is that you would clean house not play house.
What's that supposed to mean? What you think it means.
She made you hard.
You went soft.
You're in love with that sorry witch.
Bullshit is right.
You're supposed to be ridding me of enemies.
They're mouthier.
Showing up on my doorstep, disrespecting me, digging up my enemies.
When I plant a fat-assed cracker bitch, I expect her to stay planted not come back up like goddamned ragweed.
And that Fiona, doing my Bastien like that.
My poor Bastien.
They desecrated you.
And I brought you back life, and she took it away again? Well, now we take hers and all.
No more nonsense.
You go back there and you bring me their heads.
All of them.
What? Fiona, her daughter, and every witch bitch in that house.
You bring me their heads, all of them.
Then you burn that place to the ground.
Marie You do it, and you do it quick.
And I let you live.
I know you went all Malcolm X and shit, but this house is now a carnival of crazy.
How are you gonna explain this to Fiona? I'm not.
No one says a word to Fiona.
We have to keep Madison under the radar until she's better.
And I'll figure out what to do with Kyle.
I'm not taking him.
He's a walking tornado.
You made him.
He's your problem now.
Who's taking me home? It's late.
Why don't you stay the night, sleep in a bed for a change? No, thanks.
I need to be alone.
I thought you were looking for your tribe.
I was and I am.
This ain't it.
I got bad vibes.
Real bad.
There's something foul in this house.
I always hated this room.
[SCREAMING] Was I in a car crash? Drink this.
Ginger will help your stomach.
[RETCHES] [MADISON COUGHING] Do you know who you are? I'm Madison Montgomery.
I make $7 million a picture.
I have two Teen Choice Awards.
You died.
We brought you back.
What's the last thing you remember? Red.
After that, it's all dark.
Did you see a bright light? No.
There's nothing on the other side.
It's just black forever.
Who are you? What do you want? Release.
I can't do that.
[GASPS] Don't think so, dirty pussy cat.
[CORDELIA WHIMPERING] Goddamn witches.
They ended me once, right here in this very room.
And for years after the parties and the music and the dancing raged wild outside while I sat trapped inside these four ugly walls.
Now, last night this sweet young witch comes along and offers me my release.
And I said, "Oh, yes, ma'am.
Yes, please.
What do you need?" She asks her favor, and I provide.
The thing is, when the time comes for her to ante up bitch lies leaving me betwixt, between, and ready to pop.
[PANTING] You died.
And now you're trapped.
Right here with you.
Only way I can help you is if you let me out of here.
Nobody leaves this room.
You see, I had a contract.
Promises were made.
And all you've got to do is sing and dance and call the witches who owe me my freedom.
I'll provide the music.
The Axeman.
You released him? I told him I Would.
I lied.
This don't end till I get out.
Get those witches and release me now.
Go to hell.
Ladies first.
[SCREAMING] We need a spell to make him move on.
I told you not to mess with that spirit board.
Dude, there's a shit ton of books in there and not one of them is written in English.
This one's it.
Give me your hands.
What you drinking? [CHUCKLES]