Asobi Asobase: Workshop of Fun (2018) s01e01 Episode Script

1
Equivalent Exchange
I lost again.
You're so good, Onee-chan.
Okay, the loser has to go buy ice cream.
My older sister would always beat me
playing games and make me do stuff.
So I hated having fun.
Start with rock!
Rock-paper-scissors!
Look the other way!
Rock-paper-scissors!
Look the other way!
Rock-paper-scissors!
So annoying.
Look the other way!
It's a draw!
What are those two doing, anyway?
Rock-paper-scissors!
It's a draw!
Look the other way!
Rock-paper-scissors!
It's a draw!
Look the other way!
No, that's not the rule!
I keep telling you, if you look
the other way, you're safe!
And a flick to the forehead, not a slap!
Hm?
Again, with your "I don't
know Japanese" pose!
I'm done being your guide!
Wait up.
Don't just abandon a transfer
student from America.
Oh, right we have a new classmate today.
You were asked by your homeroom
teacher to do it, weren't you?
Just because I happened
to be sitting next to you!
Let's play look-the-other-way one more time.
No way, you're going to slap me again!
Japanese pastimes are so fun!
Um
Kindly shut up.
S-Sorry.
Sorry.
Who's she?
I haven't talked to her much.
Let's play look-the-other-way together.
No thanks.
Please? Just one time.
Just the tip. Just the tip.
Just the tip? How far in?
No.
I'll settle with this one, then.
Er Please, play her, just once.
That'll be enough to satisfy her.
Just once, then.
Sweet.
She's set on slapping her.
Rock-paper-scissors!
Look the other way!
Uh-oh.
What just happened?
On me
Hey, you got away!
Whoosh
Yay.
U-Um Sorry
Rock-paper-scissors.
Look the other way.
This is real look-the-other-way.
Uh Are you okay?
Also, what she said is true.
That's what you get.
Faculty Room
Pardon me.
Slow down, Olivia.
Wait up.
Um
Can I talk to you about something?
Midterm Test English
Nomura Kasumi
Two percent?!
You're totally the
read-books-after-school type!
Two percent?!
The truth is, I'm bad at English.
Hey, you're American, right?
Could you please teach me English?
You owe me for playing
look-the-other-way with you.
Dude, this chick's kind of threatening.
Um Well
Actually, my parents are foreigners,
but I was born and raised in Japan.
I was just messing with her,
pretending to be American.
I couldn't help it, she just looks so dumb.
And in fact, I can't speak a word of English.
Maybe I'll tell her.
Nope, not happening.
Um
Oh, I'm really interested in
the pastimes of other cultures.
Pastimes, you say?
All right, I can turn her down now.
I want to learn about what
the Japanese do for fun,
so I don't have time to teach you.
In that case, I'll teach you how we have fun.
But you'll have to teach me English.
Please teach me English.
Why?!
Asobi Asobase!
Asobi Asobase
Cheap Thrills
Dawn is the best time of a spring day.
The white light creeping over the mountains,
the purple-tinted clouds
splashing over them
Hullo, what Ackbar Bono!
Yo! Yo!
Silkworm narwhaller
Yum, Maggie, wow!
Scottie?
Alkaline!
Hacky sacky digital c'mon!
Hold your socks, Tania's picking tarps!
All right, Olivia-san.
Thank you very much.
But why is your Japanese so broken?
Staff Office
Weren't you born and raised in Japan?
Yes.
You got 90 percent in Japanese
on the transfer exam, didn't you?
Yes.
In fact, you got around
twenty percent in English.
You didn't need to mention that.
Sheesh.
Talk normally from now on, please.
Okay.
Not happening.
You're late.
Let's have lunch already.
Sorry, sorry.
Oh no, I was picking at the
sides, and now I only have rice.
I'll ask for some of hers.
What's for lunch?
Sandwich.
Can you give me the ham?
I don't wanna.
Um
Teach me English, please.
Shit.
I haven't studied at all.
I'm having lunch right now.
You mean the two slices of
bread you're holding together?
Thanks for the ham.
I have ham, if you want some.
Where did you pull that ham out of?
H-Ham isn't enough.
I'll teach you our pastimes, too.
So please, teach me English.
And then what happened?
So what are we doing?
It's our first time, so I thought maybe
an easy one that'll give us a thrill.
Uh
This is bad news.
This cheap thrill is a huge hit with
middle schoolers and high schoolers.
She's just talking out of her
ass because I'm a foreigner!
Oh, how about we make it a challenge
where every time you lose,
you have to teach her some English?
A challenge?
No!
It's not safe, ma'am.
Are you chickening out?
N-Not at all!
I might have a chance
if she's chickening out.
Okay.
Let's do it.
How about one pass each round?
Okay.
This kid's whack.
Wow.
You're up next.
It's dangerous, but failure isn't an option!
Sh-She's fast, too!
I kind of grazed it.
You were both fast.
You were both about the same.
I couldn't tell who won.
Okay, this time
Do it with a compass!
What is wrong with you?!
V-Very well.
Seriously?!
What speed.
Okay, next.
There're holes on the desk.
Don't worry.
Even if you mess up, you'll just gain the
ability to breathe through your finger.
Breathe? You mean I'll have bored through it.
Bye-bye, my fingers!
She's
She's fast!
No, wait!
She's nowhere near her fingers!
Wh-What should I teach you?
Let's see
How about you teach me some
casual American conversation?
Dunno.
G-Give me chocolate.
That's the English that Japanese people
used to use towards American soldiers.
Americans eat chocolate, too.
I'm sure, but you don't beg for
it on a daily basis, do you?
We beg every day.
Really?
I never knew.
I'm sorry, Americans!
That's good to know.
Whew!
I'll look up some good pastimes.
Nothing dangerous, please.
Asobi Asobase!
Asobi Asobase
Pleasure Seekers
You're amazing, Honda-san!
Keep it up, and you'll make it straight
to the nationals at the game next Sunday.
Sensei, thank you.
But, Sensei
That's not why I joined the soft tennis club.
How's the Sunday thing coming along?
It's all good.
I set us up with some people
from a boys' school.
Bring me some high-quality ones, face-wise.
Don't worry, they're all hot.
You won't be disappointed.
U-Um
What's going on next Sunday?
Hey, Honda-san.
You're so amazing, making
it onto the starting lineup.
Good luck at the tournament.
We can't wear our uniforms at the tournament,
so we'll wear them for you at the mixer.
S-Sure.
Sensei
Yes? What is it?
I'm quitting the club.
Wait, what?
Where'd that come from?
And then what happened?
So, you actually quit?
She doesn't get it.
I didn't want to win tournaments or anything.
The reason I joined the soft tennis club
is because I thought I could
be one of the popular kids.
But nope.
Popular kids are popular
before they even join.
There's something different about me.
I can't fit in.
They're all carnivores in that world.
A herbivore like me just
gets chewed apart, you know?
The substitute girl was super
happy when I quit, too.
Like, it was for the better? I guess?
Wh-When is she going
to stop talking about that?
L-Lucky you, though.
I want to join a club.
Aren't there any easy popular kids club?
What's an easy popular kid?
Um
Why don't we make a club?
Her again!
I don't know if we can make one.
In fact, I've already talked
to the teacher about it.
You and I are the members.
What? What?
Wait, what the hell?
What kind of club?
English Language Study Club.
English Language Test?
I want to qualify for Class 5 someday.
I don't think I need to
study any more English.
But
I wouldn't mind joining if it's
something other than English.
Then I'll think about
calling it something else.
Saved!
I want to join, too.
You, too, Hanako?
Give it a popular name.
She's still on about that.
Manga Club?
Were you listening to me just now?!
I mean, those people actually
have lots of meet ups and events.
I think they're pretty happy in real life.
That's not it!
Something that seems full
of people having fun.
L-Like Surfing or Diving?
Yeah, yeah!
I'm pretty sure they do
proper water sport stuff.
Hell, no!
Finally shook hands with a goblin
shark at 1200 meters under
A proper diving club might
be something like this.
But there's no way these ones
are in it for the sport.
Best Buddies 3
Actually, the proper ones, by
her standards, would be dead.
Damn it!
I don't approve of anyone who
doesn't do sports properly!
Was this girl always such a howler?
Th-Then
How about a Pastime Club?
Especially since you like
pastimes, Olivia-san.
Dude
I'm going to end up having to teach
English every time I lose, aren't I?
Although the truth is that I'm
starting to like this kind of thing.
But I don't want to admit
it either, you know?
U-Um
I've already made so many compromises.
What's your problem?
I don't know what you're
demanding, Olivia-san.
W-Wait
Why is she suddenly so pissed?
Let's settle this over a thumb war, then.
If I win, it's Pastime Club.
If you win, you can choose
whatever you'd like.
Fine.
You idiot, I totally have an advantage,
with how long my fingers are!
Okay.
Ready go.
So dull.
Now!
Huh?
Did her thumb really just bend like that?
What's she aiming for?
The base!
I have to dodge it at all costs!
Oy.
One
Two
Three
Four
Ow, ow
Five
Ow, ow, ow, ow, ow
Six
Seven
That hurts!
Eight
Nine
I give, I give!
Ten.
Fine.
Let's call it the Pastime Club.
She sounded super native saying "that hurts."
Hey
"Pastime Club" sounds a bit lame, so
Let's call it the Pastimers Club.
How is that any different?
Does it really need to be "pastimers"?
"Pastimers" makes us sound more like popular
Shibuya pleasure seekers, doesn't it?
It actually makes me think of jobless old
guys betting on horses or playing mahjong.
F-Fine.
Let's go with that.
Are you sure?!
Pastimers Club
And so the Pastimers Club,
also known as the Pass Club,
was quietly established
in the spare classroom.
They actually study pleasure seekers?
Jeez, that's so gloomy.
Asobi Asobase!
Asobi Asobase
The Kind Pervert
Olivia.
Let's go to the club room.
I'm going to take these hand-outs to
the staff room, so I'll be there later.
Okay.
Olivia's gotten good at Japanese, huh?
It's probably because
she's hanging out with us.
Crap, I need to get better more gradually.
And then what happened?
What's today's pastime?
What are they up to?
What's this?
Huh?
I mean, it's hot, so
So Hanako-san wanted to set
up a pool in the club room.
Yeah.
That sounds dangerous, in more ways than one.
Don't worry, we'll be careful.
Come on, get in your swimsuit, Olivia.
Stop, perv!
Wait, I'll get changed.
Oh yeah, I heard there's a foreign
brand of trunks that float in water.
Do you think it's true?
Do trunks float?
Wouldn't water get in?
You know how people used
to go on vacations by sea?
So apparently there were some brands
of trunks that worked as swim tubes.
I heard someone survived the
Titanic crash because of it, too.
You're so knowledgeable, Hanako-san.
I figured we should give it a try here.
But I don't have trunks.
Especially not a foreign brand.
I'll have my butler get us some, then.
Hello? Maeda?
Wait, is Hanako rich?
It's me, Hanako. Get me some trunks.
The foreign brand that has with
the Japanese emblem-looking thing.
All right, final match!
Wait, Hanako-san, maybe we
should do this normally.
It's fine.
Get on, Kasumi-san.
I don't know, it's too shallow.
Um
Could you please stop staring at my chest?
Sorry.
They're just so huge.
I've never seen anyone say that
with such a straight face.
You're so busty, Kasumi.
Yes.
She's got huge boobs.
But so what?
Is a lady with big boobs
going to bring world peace?
Sorry, Hanako, I feel bad.
How do you get them so big?
Genetics.
I'mma go be born from a
big boobed lady's womb!
I'll see you in a future life!
Hanako, no!
Please, let me die!
My mommy in this life is a washboard!
H-Hey, there's another way to get
them bigger, besides genetics.
You get fat.
That's pretty easy.
It is.
It's not too bad, if you have
strong knees and organs.
Wait, what degree of
obesity are you talking?!
My mom's got an hourglass figure.
I have lots to look forward to.
Your type gets old early.
Wh-What an asshole.
I found a good pizza place the other day.
Let's go there sometime. My treat.
Nah, I don't want to impose.
You might be trying to get me
fat, but I won't fall for it.
What are you talking about?
I'm not trying to get you
to look like Jabba Hutt.
Then what's with the extremely specific
visual I'm seeing behind you?
Take this, Hanako!
Sounds like they're having fun.
I-I have a bad feeling about this.
Um Girls?
There's something seeping through.
What are you
Shoot!
I don't want him to see
us in school swimsuits.
May I open the door?
W-W-Wait, Sensei, don't open it!
But
L-Listen, Sensei
I got this.
Olivia-chan couldn't hold it in.
She couldn't hold it in?
But it's clear
Right.
When in doubt, find out.
Only one truth prevails.
I tried licking it, but
it just tastes like water.
What is this guy doing?!
I'm really saddened that you lied to me.
S-Sorry.
That's not Olivia's pee.
It's just water.
I see.
I-Is it just me, or was
he disappointed just now?
I'm really happy that you told me the truth.
Thank you, girls.
Continue being honest.
Okay, Sensei.
Be sure to clean up the water later.
Okay.
He's a good person.
Are you serious?!
I was just playing along so he'd
go home without a confrontation!
What he did was super gross!
Asobi Asobase
Asobi Asobase!
Japanese Pastimes, Please
What shall we do?
What to do?
Daruma Otoshi.
Daruma Otoshi
A game — or rather, a hunt —
played primarily by popular girls.
Strait-laced boys
The winner is the girl who,
at a mixer or drinking party,
manages to seduce and drive mad a
strait-laced boy with no interest in women,
Blonde Hair and Blue Eyes
with her sheer womanly wiles.
There are no particular rules
or dos or do-nots to this game.
Wealth
Misandrist
Um what do I do?
Um
Dudes are so gross, damn it!
Asobi Asobase
Asobi Asobase!