Back to the Future (1991) s01e11 Episode Script

73005 - Gone Fishin'

(THEME MUSIC PLAYING) MAN: (SINGING) Tell me, Doctor, where are we going this time? Is this the '50s Or 1999? All I wanted to do Was play my guitar and sing So take me away I don't mind But you better promise me I'll be back in time Gotta get back in time I'll be back in time Gotta get back in time That's me, Doc Brown in the 1920s.
Well, it's actually the me of the 1990s, in the 1920s.
The purpose of my journey? To meet one of my biggest idols, and one of the most brilliant inventors of all time Thomas Edison.
Inventor of the phonograph, the motion picture camera and the electric light bulb.
And he gave me an autograph.
Talk about a collector's item! (SHATTERS) Personal note to myself.
Plan a return trip to meet Thomas Edison, and bring extra light bulbs.
The 1920s, also known as the Roaring Twenties.
A time of flappers, fads and films.
Silent films, that is.
I'm sure you've all heard of Charlie Chaplin and Buster Keaton, but only the real film historians among you recall Daredevil Brown.
Talk about a Hollywood success story! And it all began, curiously enough, with a fishing trip.
(DOC HUMMING) (ELECTRICITY CRACKLING) (SMACKS LIPS) All right! He's in a good mood.
One automatically water-proofed pair of tennis shoes coming up.
(EXPLOSION) (COUGHING) (SIZZLING) Hmm Perhaps a fast food franchise would be interested.
Hey, Pop, check it out.
Let's see, this Saturday (GULPS) Father and Son Big Mouth Bass-Off? Sorry, Verne, but I can't go (UNINTELLIGIBLE) (YELLING) (THUDS) Fish.
The word is fish.
Behold, Father.
My Uni-view allows television observation without annoying others in the room.
Anything to get my mind off of Oh, well, never mind.
An old Andy Griffith re-broadcast is about to commence.
Andy and Opie are going (MUMBLING) Hey, Dad.
What you got against fishin'? Don't say that word! What's with Pop? I'm not sure.
Perhaps tonight when he's asleep, we can discover the problem.
(DOOR OPENS) (SNORING) What's the doohickey? An otoscope used for ear examinations.
You think too much wax is driving Pops wackeroo? Negative.
I have modified the device into a cerebrum observator, allowing us to actually view Father's thoughts.
(BEEPING) (YELLING) (GRUNTING) Observe, one of Father's unfinished thoughts.
(SQUELCHING) What's that stinking thing? I presume it to be one of Father's brainstorms.
Then those must be brain waves.
Regard, Father's vast library of knowledge.
Hey, Jules, this one's overdue.
(VERNE LAUGHING) (GRUNTS) BOTH: "No admittance.
Keep out.
"This means you.
" Euripedes! A memory block dating back to August 5, 1926.
Father's childhood.
Let us see if we can chip it away.
(CLANGING) (CRACKING) JULES: Success! Now to observe what Father has chosen to forget.
VERNE: Hey, there's Pop.
He used to like fishing.
(SPLASHING) Gadzooks! Assistance requested! (COUGHING) (SPLASHING) So that's why he hates fishing.
JULES: We must return to 1926 and prevent Father from falling into that stream.
Oucha-ma-goucha! A migraine and a nocturnal-mare all rolled into one! JULES: Silence is imperative so as not to awaken Mother and Father.
Yeah, but how come I have to push? Don't be absurd, brother.
You're much too young to drive.
MARTY: Hey, what are you little punks doing? JULES: Martin? I just came over to get my hoverboard.
Where are you off to? Milwaukee, to prevent one of Father's mishaps when he was four years old.
Milwaukee? That must've been when Doc stayed with his Oddball Uncle Oliver.
Just don't fink on us.
All right, I won't If you'll let me come along.
I'd love to be smarter than Doc for a change.
(EXPLOSION) MARTY: (CHUCKLING) I mean, how much can a little kid know? VERNE: There's Dad now.
JULES: Why don't you ask him? Hey, you kid.
What do you know? Several languages, the Periodic Table, the constellations of the Northern Hemisphere and the Encyclopedia from "A" to "Grrr.
" (THUDDING) You might want to brush up on casting.
I will if Uncle Oliver ever comes down and takes me fishing like he promised.
Comes down from where? Soon the world record for flagpole sitting is mine.
Ach Dulieber! Look at that! A flock of adoring fans is beginning to congregate! What is he, a pigeon? Looks more like a loon.
Perhaps you fellows might convince Uncle Oliver to take me fishing.
Yes, but how do you propose we speak with him? Hey, I've got an idea that just might fly.
Shoo, shoo! (BIRD SQUAWKING) Vas is das? Uncle Ollie, hi! Yeah, well, you certainly are.
Care for a bite of Wiener schnitzel? No, thanks.
But about your nephew, Emmett.
You promised to take him fishing today.
OLIVER: When I'm rich und famous, I'll take him whaling.
How about if Emmett goes fishing with me and my friends? OLIVER: Ja, just have him home by 6:00 for sauerkraut and cabbage.
(CRASHING) Nice sunroof.
Ouch! Hold it! Emmett, perhaps you should stand over here.
Jules, you're crazy.
This looks like a great spot to fish.
Whoa! (SPLASHING) BOTH: Told you so.
Holy mackerel, that fall gave me a haddock.
(CHUCKLING) Now, Emmett, the secret to successful casting is snapping your wrist.
Like this? Great Scott! Now, that's what I call fly fishing! Holy bovine! Eine more minute and I've set the record.
Emmett! (TICKING) Stop, you crazy Kinders! I thought you were going to watch my Emmett.
We're watching.
He's putting on a great show.
Galloping Galileo! (CHEERING AND APPLAUSE) Jeepers, this is the best stunt flying I've ever seen! (CHEERING AND APPLAUSE) OLIVER: Nephew, are you all right? FLICKERS: All right? He's sensational! And I got it all on film.
Kid, you're gonna be a star! Und I'll be his manager! All I wanted was to go fishing.
Hey, it's Emmett! Shh! Aw, don't get your shorts in a wad.
It's a silent movie! Is there any other kind? (JULES READING) (CHEERING) That's my little liebchin! Why, it's Emmett Brown in the flesh! Yeah, that's what holds him together.
Sir, I'm Harvey Wannamaker, famous Hollywood talent scout.
Sign on the dotted line and that kid will make millions.
Jawohl, mein Herr! Hollywood, here we come! Hollywood? Cool! (BOTH YELLING) Not so cool.
We have forever altered Father's life! He may never meet Mother, and we would cease to exist.
That's one way to stop you from picking' on me.
Brother, that is disgusting! It's mine, skunkhead! Hey, hey! Chill out, you two.
We've got to stick close to little Doc and Oddball Uncle Ollie to make sure things don't get worse.
Ugh! There's only one problem.
How do we get to Hollywood? Perhaps we may be of assistance! LITTLE DOC: A car that transforms into a zeppelin! Brilliant idea.
Stinking brag about it why don't you? (CROWD LAUGHING) (CHEERING AND APPLAUSE) (BOY READING) REPORTER: Yes, the nation has gone Daredevil Brown crazy! People all over America are reading Daredevil Brown comics, drinking Daredevil Brown soda, and buying every Daredevil Brown product from soup to nuts! I'll give you two Babe Ruths and an autographed Ty Cobb for your Daredevil Brown.
Have you flipped your lid? Nobody gets my Emmett! Oddball Uncle Oliver, are you sure this is the best thing for little Emmett? Oh, Jawohl! The Kinder's getting a bang out of it! (EXPLOSION) (YELLING) Little Em has given me the courage to fly solo across the Atlantic.
And I'm taking my brother with me! Joe, give me an Emmett.
Next! (JAZZ MUSIC PLAYING) Spread your arms straight out like an airplane wing Sway back and forth like a trapeze swing Roll and flip and slip around Now you're doin' the Daredevil Brown Uncle, may I swim in the pool with my friends? Nein, you might get hurt.
Save it for the cameras.
Aw, for Petri's sake! I'll be in my room.
Uh, Uncle Ollie, do you really think Emmett is enjoying all this? Ugh! What's not to enjoy? He's rich, he's famous, and the air in Hollywood is so clean! But the little dude is bummed out.
Ja, maybe you are right.
Hmm.
We've had our fun.
Perhaps I shall return to Milwaukee with little Emmett.
(TELEPHONE RINGING) Ja.
Ja.
Uh-huh.
Ja.
Jawohl! Just as soon as he performs one last stunt.
Daredevil Brown is going over America's tallest waterfall.
OLIVER: In a barrel! (SINGING) Now you're doing the Daredevil Brown VERNE: Man, this makes Super Splash Water World look like a leaky faucet! LITTLE DOC: Estimating the falls' height at 2,425 feet and utilizing Newton's formula for acceleration due to gravity, I'll be traveling approximately upon impact.
I'll bet that barrel doesn't even have an air-bag.
(POPPING) What kind of blockhead would make up such a stupid, stinking stunt? Boys, I'd like you to meet the man responsible for all this Herr D.
W.
Tannen! MARTY: I should've known.
Uncle Oliver, I'm somewhat hesitant about this particular feat.
Emmett, baby.
It's movie magic.
You don't really go over the falls.
We use a dummy.
MARTY: Oh, you're going to do it? (CHORTLES) What are you, an extra? You're fired.
Look, sweetie, here's the trap door.
It's a fix.
You duck down and shove a dummy into the barrel.
Boogie, boogie, boogie! Ooh! (CHORTLES) Oh, I'm in stitches.
You're fired.
Daredevil, sweetheart, Let's be a good boy and slip into your costume.
Or you're fired.
TANNEN: Are you sure you got it? Uh, yeah.
I open the trap door, make sure the Daredevil switches with the dummy and then send the barrel over the edge.
(SCOFFS) No.
That's just a load of banana oil for the punk's goofball uncle.
I want that kid inside the barrel.
This has got to look like the real McDonald! Uh, you mean the real McCoy? Yeah? You're fired.
Jumpin' gigawatts! They're going to make us orphans before we're even born! I'm formulating a notion, but we'll need some time.
Martin, are you able to walk a straight line? Oh, sure.
Although I enjoy a good curve now and then.
(YELLING) (THUDDING) MARTY: Ouch! TANNEN: You're fired! TANNEN: Welcome, one and all, to the most dangerous stunt ever performed by boy or man! And you can see this feat of derring-do in the My fabulous feature film Raging Death Doom, D.
W.
Tanner, producer.
And now, my closest friend, Daredevil Brown! (CHEERING AND APPLAUSE) JULES: Wait! First, an added attraction! Tightrope walking across the falls will be none other than Courageous Clyde! (HESITANT CLAPPING) Thank you, thank you.
It all began when I was born.
I was just a baby at the time Verne, your wad of bubble gum, please? MARTY: (NERVOUSLY) That's a joke, folks.
Uh, hello? This disgusting yet sticky substance will provide Martin with a strong center of balance.
And while he's out there, I'll equip Emmett's barrel with this spare Flux Capacitor.
Cool! Where you going to send him? Not him.
You.
it was then and there I knew the tightrope was for me.
Quit stalling.
Get out there! Whoa! One of these days I'll learn to stay home In the 1990s! (YELLING) (SIGHS) I never thought I'd be so happy to have gum stuck on my shoes.
Hey! Remind me to fire this creampuff.
Get the kid and the barrel.
Ta-da! JULES: You're the spitting image of your father.
Okay, short-stuff, it's show time.
Hop in.
Ready when you are, D.
W.
And now, Daredevil Brown will go over upper Yosemite Falls in a barrel! (CHEERING) Auf Wiedersehen, Emmy! Hey, boss, what should I do with this dummy? Dummy? Relax, Unc.
If he doesn't make it, we'll shoot a movie about his life story.
(CHUCKLES) It's got a great ending.
(GASPING) You would jeopardize the safety of a child for a movie? You did.
And, don't touch the suit! Nephew, come back! Uncle Oliver, didn't you just eat? Oh, I've got you, Emmett! (YELLING) Hope this catch doesn't put me over my limit.
Whoa! (ALL GASPING) (YELLING) Emmett, no! (BEEPING) To attain 88 miles per hour, an object must free fall (ALL GASPING) Emmett! I lost my little Emmett! Here I am, Uncle Oliver! Emmett! I'll make him more famous than Houdini! Hey, Ollie, baby.
Sign here.
Take your contract und go jump in a lake, you big galoot! (SPLASHING) You'll never eat breakfast in this town again! TANNEN: And you're fired! Say, Daredevil, can we have a statement for your fans? (FILM ROLLING) Sorry, but Daredevil has retired so little Emmett and I can go fishing! Might I suggest a pond just upstream? Hey! I'm starting to wrinkle up like a prune out here! LITTLE DOC: Fishing with you is fun, Uncle Oliver.
I was a dummkopf not to take you sooner.
Oucha-ma-goucha! Peculiar expression of discomfort, although it has a nice ring to it.
If my calculations are correct, we have four, three, two, one (EXPLODING) Definitely better than Super Splash Water World! DOC: Elevate and illuminate! Only one more day of the Hill Valley Father and Son Big Mouth Bass-Off! Whoo-hoo! Father, I was under the impression that you disliked fishing.
Galloping Galileo, Oddball Uncle Oliver and I were fishing fools! Did I ever regale you of the time I caught an airplane? AUTOMATED VOICE: Auto-iris adjusting.
You're on, Doctor Brown.
Doctor Emmett Brown, here.
I was quite a little whippersnapper in the old days, wasn't I? Even at a young age I was well versed in Newton's laws of gravity.
And as you saw, that knowledge came in quite handy.
Just what did Newton know about gravity? Let's take a look.
Access video encyclopedia, section "G" for gravity.
COMPUTER: Section "G.
" Entry, "Gravity.
" DOC: Sir Isaac Newton was the first scientist to quantify gravity.
He figured out that gravity could be perfectly described by using math.
In fact, it was out of his work with gravity that Newton invented calculus.
And if you don't know what that is yet, don't worry, you'll find out.
Newton figured out that regardless of size or weight, objects always fall at a consistent rate.
Well, let's test Mr.
Newton's little theory.
Here we have an ordinary apple, and an equally ordinary bowling ball.
The apple weighs about a quarter pound and the bowling ball 15 pounds.
Both are suspended by this mechanism at a height of exactly five feet.
We'll release both objects simultaneously and if Mr.
Newton's law is correct, they should hit the ground at precisely the same instant.
(THUDDING) Pretty amazing, huh? Let's watch that one in slow motion.
There they are on the platform.
The string is yanked and Whoo! Look at them go! They hit at the exact same moment.
(THUD) So, as you can see, Newton's laws of gravity are as relevant today as they were when he discovered them.
Two objects of different weight and size are affected by gravity in the same way.
Pretty heavy, huh? (APPLE CRUNCHING) (GRUNTS) Now that's heavy! (SPLUTTERING) See you in the future.
(JAZZ MUSIC PLAYING) Stumble, bumble, do some belly flops Fumble, tumble, until your body drops Everybody, stand up Everybody, fall down Now you're doing the Daredevil Everybody, Daredevil Now you're doing the Daredevil Brown Hello, music lovers.
(PIANO TINKLING) Today's question, what is the difference between a piano and a fish? (PIANO TINKLING) You can tune a piano, but you can't "tuna fish.
" (LAUGHING) Why you Ugh!
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