Back to You (2007) s01e17 Episode Script

Hostage Watch

For those of you just tuning in a gunman has taken hostages at the downtown Pittsburgh Mutual Bank and our Chuck Darling is inside the building attempting to negotiate the release of those hostages.
Gary Crezyzewski, can you tell us what's happening? Kelly, Chuck has now been inside Pittsburgh Mutual Bank for about seven minutes.
- [Gunshots.]
- [Man.]
Shots fired! Shots fired! That was a gunshot.
We have shots fired.
This is the slowest news day ever.
This isn't a problem.
It's an opportunity.
You're right.
I'm gonna go pick up my dry cleaning.
No, sir.
Sit down.
This is our chance to do some tasty human interest stories.
"Transgender beauty pageant"? Yeah, I lined up an interview with last year's Miss/Mr.
America.
- I'm not doing it.
- Why not? I talked to him/her on the phone yesterday and he/she is a really nice guy/ girl.
It's not news.
It's a gimmick to get ratings.
Whatever happened to respect for the news, huh? Whatever happened to wearing pants to work? I had an early game of tennis this morning.
It's of no concern to our viewers.
They only see me from the waist up.
I hope it's the same with those "trannies" you- - I'm not doing that story.
- Guys, come on.
We need some creative thinking here.
Check this out.
It's the new Channel 3 promo for Chad Brackett.
[Man.]
They're homeless, they're hungry and their hearts are as big as all outdoors which is where they live, and where I lived to reveal the truth of their desperate dilemma.
[Male Announcer.]
Chad Brackett, "There's No Place Like Homeless" a special series tonight on News Channel 3.
Got a quarter? - Don't wink at me, ya jackass.
- [TV Clicks Off.]
Just lay off the guy.
He's just trying to keep people from changing the channel.
It's what you're trying to do with that three-part series on mortgages.
People watch, fall into a coma, stay on our channel until the neighbor finds their bodies.
That mortgage series was informative.
I made it interesting.
I made it dynamic.
I made it to the end by jabbing a pen in my hand.
Well, at least it was substantive.
- Homelessness isn't? - Not the way he does it.
He puts on a fat suit- "Fat in America.
" He puts on an Afro- "Black in America.
" He's not doing the news.
He's doing a sketch show.
But you have to admit, when he was the black guy, he could not get a cab.
Yeah, because he looked like a lunatic wearing a fake Afro and a big clock around his neck.
- [Cell Phone Rings.]
- Oh, I'm sorry, guys.
It's my landlord.
- I apologize, but I may have to rip him a new one.
- [Beeps.]
Mr.
Stupak, I have a major problem with that $650 bill that you sent me.
If a pipe bursts in your building, why should I have to pay for it? - You go, Ryan.
- Wait for it.
No, I did not know that.
I'm sorry.
Hello? - Hello? So- - [Beeps.]
Where was I? You were ripping your landlord a check for $650.
Hey, guys.
We have a robbery in progress at the Pittsburgh Mutual Bank downtown.
The guy's got a whole bunch of hostages.
- [Gasps.]
- That's my bank.
- Oh, my God.
This is huge.
Okay.
Gary, get down there.
- Got it.
Wait.
You know what? The gunman says he'll only talk to one person- Chuck Darling.
- Police are on their way to get you right now.
- What do you think, Chuck? Of course I'll do it.
I'm a man of action.
Just let me put on some makeup first.
[Ryan.]
Okay, people.
We have a hostage situation.
We're gonna be breaking in live.
Are you really going down to that bank where a crazy guy has a gun? - Are you forgetting something? - Yeah.
I'll borrow some pants.
What about your daughter? What is she, about a 14-inch waist? You're a father now.
You don't even hesitate for a second before you do something dangerous? This is what we do.
I remember one time when you tied yourself to a telephone pole during a tornado.
- What happened to that girl? - You got her pregnant.
Listen.
When somebody has a child they usually stop doing reckless things because it's selfish.
Does a fireman stop running into burning buildings just 'cause he has a child? You're not a fireman.
You're a guy who reads the news in shorts that might have fit in high school.
And, by the way, don't tell me that you're going down there to help those poor hostages.
- You're going down there to pump up your ego.
- All right.
Just because you gave up being a real newsperson, doesn't mean I have to.
Oh, my-You know what? Fine.
Go down there.
Be a big hero.
Hope you get shot.
Fine! - Chuck, if there's anything you need- - I need your pants.
Ooh.
No can do.
I'm going cowboy today, and I do not need another grievance from H.
R.
Hey, Curtis.
Come on.
You're gonna take one for the team.
- I need to borrow your pants.
- All right.
[Chuck.]
Oh, my God.
What is it, cowboy Friday? Okay.
We're gonna be breaking in to programming in two minutes.
I'm gonna be coordinating everything from the control room.
Oh, God.
I've never handled a big crisis like this before.
Oh, you'll be fine.
Oh, this isn't good.
What? I'm too scared to sweat.
My God.
I'm scared sweatless.
- Okay.
Here we go.
I hope Chuck knows what he's doing.
- He'll be fine.
I don't know.
Guy with a gun.
It could get pretty hairy.
It's not going to.
Don't even put that out there.
Nothing's gonna happen to him.
- Okay.
Fine.
Relax.
- I'm sorry.
I'm sorry, Marsh.
It's just I'm regretting what I said to him just before he went in.
It was kind of inappropriate.
Oh, I get it.
Kind of like, uh "If you get out of that bank alive, I'll let you take a run at my night deposit box"? - No, Marsh.
- "If you get that gunman's hands in the air I'll do the same thing with my feet"? - Not bad, right, guys? - No, Marsh.
- [Laughs.]
- It was nothing like that.
I said, "I hope you get shot.
" My God.
Don't you have a filter? Kelly, Marsh, we're going live in 30 seconds.
Marty, I need you to give me a graphic that says "Breaking News.
" Then I want you to spin it and turn it into "Hostage Watch.
" - Freddy, play me something dramatic.
- ## [Dramatic Fanfare.]
- Not that.
- ## [Ominous.]
That.
Kelly, Marsh, you're gonna have 20 seconds.
Then you're gonna throw it to Gary.
Gary, you're gonna throw it to Captain Dave in the chopper.
Gary, can you hear me? - Yeah.
Right here.
- Kelly's gonna do a quick intro and then toss it to you.
Gary, do me a favor.
Try to loosen up a bit when you're on camera.
- What does that mean? - We did some testing.
People say you have a tendency to be stiff.
- I'm stiff? - Pigeons have landed on you.
Okay, people.
We're live in five, four, three- The kid's back.
[Ominous.]
Good afternoon.
Several people are being held hostage at the downtown Pittsburgh Mutual Bank and the hostage taker has demanded that our own Chuck Darling act as intermediary.
Coincidentally, News 9 sports anchor Marsh McGinley has been a longtime patron of the bank.
Marsh, what can you tell us about the physical layout? Uh, not much, Kelly.
I usually use the drive-through.
Um, I would go inside, but the place has absolutely no parking.
Well, Marsh, are there some elevated positions near the bank where the police could get a look at what's happening inside? Well, an excellent vantage point would be the parking garage directly across the street which is two dollars each half hour.
But, I'm sorry, I'm not made of money.
Gary Crezyzewski is live at the scene.
What's happening, Gary? It's pretty tense here, Kelly.
Police say the gunman walked into the bank at around 3:40, much as I'm walking now.
Now, whether he ran in or casually sauntered, trying to blend in, is anyone's guess.
But one thing is clear.
He's in there, and he's got a gun.
What about Chuck Darling? Is there any way we can talk to him - say, one last thing before he goes inside? - Uh, Chuck.
Chuck.
Can you, uh, tell us how you're feeling as you head in? Are you scared? Gary, I am not scared.
And I'll tell you why.
This gunman asked for me because he knows I have integrity.
What does scare me is what might happen if I weren't here.
Mr.
Darling.
I guess it's go time.
Kelly, follow me over here, and we'll get an exclusive Channel 9 look at how Chuck is being prepped by the police.
Get that camera out of here now! We're gonna back up now, Kelly, and tell you a little more about the building itself.
Okay, sir.
I want you to fully understand the danger.
Even though you're wearing this bulletproof vest you could walk in there and he could shoot you in the head.
Appreciate your concern, Officer but this guy's obviously a fan who respects my integrity.
Sometimes these people specifically ask for someone just so they can kill them.
I did not know that.
Uh, it looks like Chuck Darling is about to enter the bank and hopefully negotiate the release of the hostages.
This is definitely a tense situation.
Let's check back with Gary Crezyzewski.
Gary? Kelly, Marsh.
The tension is building.
Police are everywhere.
They've cleared the public out of the building next door including a fairly crowded restaurant.
That would actually be a Korean bakery, Kelly and if their cupcakes don't put a smile on your face watching them try to say "lemon tart" certainly will.
- Thank you, Marsh.
- They say it like "remon" tart.
Okay.
That's offensive.
Rudy, type up an apology for Marsh to read.
Let's go to Captain Dave in News Chopper 9 for a look at the scene from above.
- Captain Dave? - And clear.
Kelly, stand by.
Ryan, can you patch me through to Gary? I need to talk to Chuck before he goes inside there.
Gary, can you get to Chuck? Kelly needs to speak to him.
She says it's important.
Hold on.
He's just about to go in.
Chuck, Kelly says she needs to talk to.
- I'm kind of busy.
- I know.
She says it's important.
Yes? Chuck- [Chuckles.]
I was just mad before.
- I-I don't want you to get shot.
- I know.
It's fine.
Listen.
If something does happen to me, please tell Gracie- - Mr.
Darling, we gotta go.
- They're calling me.
Be safe.
I don't want anything to happen to you.
You know I love you.
Yeah.
I gotta go.
As the father of my child.
I- I didn't mean it the way it sounded.
I- Chuck? He's gone.
[Sighs.]
No.
'Cause I- I didn't mean it the way that sounded.
I'm just saying it like how friends say it, like, "I love you, man.
" In fact, I was gonna add "man" before he cut me off.
- I never heard you say "man" that way.
- Seriously? [Chuckles.]
What are you, tripping, man? - [Siren Wails.]
- [Kelly.]
There he is.
We can see Chuck Darling going into the building to meet with the gunman.
This is a very tense moment, ladies and gentlemen.
Anything could happen.
Hello? Here I am.
As per your request.
Who are you? Chuck Darling.
You're not Chuck Darling.
I most certainly am.
I wanted Chuck Darling from Channel 3.
I'm from Channel 9.
Channel 3 is Chad Brackett.
Chad Brackett! That's who I wanted.
For those of you just tuning in a gunman has taken hostages at the downtown Pittsburgh Mutual Bank and our Chuck Darling is inside the building attempting to negotiate the release of those hostages.
Gary Crezyzewski, can you tell us what's happening? Kelly, we're in a holding pattern here.
No movement whatsoever.
The tension's so thick, you can cut it.
Look.
I'm sorry there was some confusion, but I'm here now.
Let's try to resolve this thing together.
What is it you want? I want Chad Brackett.
He's not available.
- I saw him out the window.
Go get him.
- No! - Go get him! - No! You can shoot me if you want to, but I won't do it! - Why the hell not? - Because I made a big show about being the one you wanted and I will not go out there and humiliate myself.
- You happy? - Not particularly.
My whole life's collapsing around me, and I haven't slept in three days.
Where are the hostages? Locked up in the break room.
And that's where you're going.
Come on.
Let's go.
- Oh, this is terrific.
- Oh, you having a bad day? I'm sorry about that.
I'm sorry.
It happens to be my first bank robbery.
This ain't a bank robbery.
These bastards are trying to take my house.
And I want the whole world to know about it, and that's why I want Chuck Darling- Chad Brackett.
Why does that keep happening? Listen.
I could tell your story.
- No.
- Then what is your plan? I don't have a plan.
I got pissed.
I grabbed the security guard's gun and said I'd shoot someone every 15 minutes.
Hey.
What time you got? You know, mine's running fast.
Listen.
I don't want to be pushy but, please, don't shoot anyone.
I don't know.
People say my problem is I don't follow through with things.
That and meth.
[Cell Phone Rings.]
- Who the hell is that? - Look.
I tell you what.
- I'll just turn off the ringer, okay? - [Rings, Beeps.]
It's my daughter.
Sometimes she calls me after school.
Yeah, yeah.
[Clatters.]
- [Helicopter Whirring.]
- Okay.
I'll tell you what.
I'm gonna go out and get Chad Brackett.
It's fine.
No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no.
I like you now.
Graphics, I want a running clock on how long Chuck has been in the bank.
It's your landlord.
Kelly, in five seconds, you're gonna toss it to Susan for a report on bank security.
Stupak, you're paying for me to move my furniture you're putting me up in a hotel, I'm parking my bike for free, and watch your tone.
- [Cell Phone Rings.]
- Okay, Mom.
Listen up.
I'm not coming over this weekend, you're not calling me Bear-Bear anymore and stop making your "famous" lasagna! Nobody likes it! I'm gonna regret that.
- I see you're married.
She must be worried about you.
- Nah.
She's overseas.
She's in the air force.
- But we're separated anyway, so- - What happened? We wanted different things.
She wanted two dogs and a white picket fence.
I wanted one dog and some meth.
Okay.
Did it ever occur to you that part of your problem might stem from your affinity for meth? Oh, you think? [Man On Bullhorn.]
Guys, we need to hear something.
We need to know you're all right.
You think I'm all right? You think I'm messing around? Don't take my house away! Then I'll be all right! Then I'll be all right! - Get over here.
- [Grunts.]
Listen.
I think I can help you save your house.
- Yeah, right.
- Please.
Just sit down and listen to me for one minute.
Please.
Okay.
Okay.
Last week, I did a series on mortgages.
I don't know.
Sounds kind of dull.
All right.
All right.
I'll tell you what.
Just try to stay with me here.
In my series, I cover the Service members Civil Relief Act.
It applies to military personnel who had a mortgage before they enlisted or before they were called up to active duty.
The act limits the amount of interest that may be charged on mortgages incurred by service members or their spouses.
Mortgage lenders must reduce the interest rate to no more than six percent per year during the period of active military service and must recalculate the payments to reflect the lower rate.
[Snores.]
Well, I thought it was interesting.
[Helicopter Whirring.]
- [Gunshot.]
- [Man.]
Shots fired! Shots fired! That was a gunshot.
We have shots fired.
Don't move! What happened? Did you karate chop me? Yes.
Yes, I did.
As you have just heard, we have reports of shots fired.
We don't know who, if anyone, was hit.
All we can do is hope and pray that everyone inside including our good friend and colleague, Chuck Darling, is okay.
Hear, hear, Kelly.
- It's not often that a news story hits this close to home for us.
- [Sighs Deeply.]
But no matter what happens, this reporter wants to say that Chuck Darling is a hero as are the proud and noble men and women of the Korean community.
Let's check back with Gary Crezyzewski.
Gary? Okay.
We're still waiting for some word, any sign that things are all right.
There it is! There's Chuck Darling, and there are all the hostages.
- [Crowd Cheering.]
- They are all smiling and appear to be okay.
All right! Chuck, tell us what happened in there.
[Applause.]
Well, that is certainly good news.
Gary- Uh, before we send it to Gary, Kelly, I've just been notified that, due to police barricades, Claremont Avenue is completely closed.
So, whatever your travel plans, avoid Claremont.
- Go ahead, Gary.
- [Ryan.]
Clear.
When did that come in? It didn't.
I take Claremont to get home, and it's crazy this time of day.
- Hey.
Nice job, Gary.
Way to go.
- Hey.
Thanks.
Thanks, guys.
- Nice.
- Ryan, buddy, you were incredible out there.
Everybody's talking about it.
Well, I'm used to running against the clock in life-or-death situations.
Halo 3.
Try to beat me.
You can't.
But you- - You.
- Yeah? You've gotta tone it way down.
- [Man.]
Hey.
- Here he is! - Man of the hour! - Oh, no, no.
- Not necessary.
- Oh, come on.
Don't be so humble.
Listen.
We are a team.
One of us looks good, we all look good.
[Chuckles.]
- You, uh, want your shorts back? - Um- You may keep those, young cowboy.
Cool.
- Hello there.
- Hello.
- You got back here quickly.
- It's amazing.
There was absolutely no traffic on Claremont.
Listen.
I'm sorry I tried to guilt you into not going because of Gracie.
I mean, you were a newsman long before you were a father.
And by the way, you were incredible.
- Thank you.
- And you're right.
We have to maintain our standards.
I mean, the guy asked for you.
Aw, hell.
- The guy didn't even want me.
He asked for Chad Brackett.
- [Gasps.]
Seriously? - Yeah.
- God, that's just a teeny bit too sad for me to enjoy.
You know, Gracie called my cell in the middle of it.
- [Gasps.]
Oh, my God.
She did? - Yeah.
I've been in some dangerous situations before.
Raging floods, war zones- all of that.
This is the first time I thought "I gotta get out of here.
This isn't worth it.
" Damn.
- I lost my edge because of a fourth grader.
- Oh.
Maybe.
But it's a good trade.
So maybe you'll think twice before doing this again? Yeah.
Yeah, but I'll probably still do it.
Don't forget.
The guy that ran into that building is the guy that you love.
Oh! You know what? I was waiting for that.
Oh, God.
[Chuckles.]
That's the beauty of it.
Love is worth waiting for.
I said, "I love you, man," and I only said that 'cause I thought you were gonna get shot.
Instead it was you who got shot- by an arrow through the heart.
Okay.
I said it as a friend.
I said it as a friend, and I retracted it immediately.
Yeah, yeah, but you're still glad I didn't get killed.
I guess.
There it is.
Love.
- # "L" is for the way you look # - Okay.
Go.
At me - [Audience Cheering.]
- [Applause.]
[Cheering Continues.]
[No Audible Dialogue.]
- [Cheering Continues.]
- [Applause Continues.]
- [School Bell Rings.]
- [Children Chattering.]

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