Better Call Saul (2015) s02e01 Episode Script


Previously on "Better Call Saul" Why were you working against me? You're not a real lawyer! Now that I'm doing the job alone, I get the full 1500.
I can get more pills.
If you're gonna be a criminal, do your homework.
Thanks for not heading to the Bahamas with this.
- What are you doing? - "The right thing.
" Whatever it was, did you get it out of your system? Yep, all gone.
The Sandpiper case? It's getting too big for HHM.
What are you talking about? I'm talking about there's an office in Santa Fe with your name on it.
Good night, ladies.
Get home safe.
See you later, Gene.
Good night.
No, no, no, no! God damn it! No! Oh, c-come on.
Hey! Hey! Somebody! Hey! Hey! Hey! Ah, here he is.
Oh, great.
Jimmy, right on time.
Good to see you.
Hello, Howard.
James McGill, Clifford Main.
Just "Jimmy.
" And it's a pleasure to meet you, Clifford.
We know all about your work on Sandpiper.
Well, it's a group effort.
I mean, the folks at HHM are just knocking it out of the park.
Well, you know, the case wouldn't exist without you.
Once you get him on your team, you'll know why I call him "Charlie Hustle.
" Jimmy, these are my associates Brian Archuleta and Erin Brill.
- Nice to meet you both.
- It's great to meet you.
I hate to do this, but, um, could I borrow Ms.
Wexler for a moment? If you will excuse us? Pardon me.
What's going on? I just, um Listen, here's the thing.
If I take this job, does that mean the two of us I mean, uh Does it mean, uh What? What What the hell is this? If I take this job today, with Davis and Main does that mean that you and me Is this Is this gonna happen? Jimmy, I I One thing has absolutely nothing to do with the other.
Nothing at all.
Of course not.
Why would it? Great.
Uh, sorry about that.
Listen, I just want to say thank you, sincerely, For your interest in me.
It's an honor to be considered, But at this time At this time Um, I'm gonna have to take myself out of the running.
Thank you, Howard.
Uh, Jimmy? Well, that was quick.
No charge.
Help me out here.
Did I dream it, Or did I have $1,600,000 on my desk in cash? No one on god's green earth knew we had it.
We could've split it 50/50.
We could've gone home with $800,000 each! Tax-free! Your point being? Why didn't we? I remember you saying something about doing the right thing.
You want to know why I didn't take that money? Is that what you're asking? Yeah, that's what I'm asking.
Me, personally, I was hired to do a job.
I did it.
That's as far as it goes.
Well, I know what stopped me.
And you know what? It's never stopping me again.
Chao cac co, ladies! Chao cac co! Mrs.
Nguyen, it's a beautiful day out there.
You should get out of this place once in a while.
You know, throw a frisbee, have some fun.
I have a business to run.
Uh, no.
The business is running you.
Listen to me.
You'll thank me later.
Cucumber water for customer only.
Hey! It's me! Geez.
Hello? Hello? It's me.
I got a new car.
You like it? We're not taking that to the meet.
How are we gonna get there? I'll drive.
My car.
Why? This business requires restraint.
That is the opposite of restraint.
But I like it.
I mean, I'm proud of it.
Then you be proud of it on your own time, but not with me.
I'm not getting in that.
Then then don't.
Honestly, uh, you don't really do anything.
I've been paying you the salary of three people to just stand behind me.
You know? And And these these last few deals This Nacho fella, he's been coming alone.
I mean, if he doesn't need backup men, then, I mean, why do I need you? I should just go alone.
I'm throwing I'm throwing away money.
Just tossing it away.
Into the trash.
Look, you do whatever you want, but I'm advising you do not go to that meet without someone watching your back.
Yeah, well, of course you're gonna say that.
I mean, you don't want to be out of this easy-peasy job.
Well, I'm sorry, but this is the gravy train, and it's leaving the station right now.
So last chance.
All aboard.
Seriously, last chance.
I'm gonna count to, say, 10, and then I'm All right, then.
Your services are no longer needed! Hola.
No old guy? What, did he break a hip or something? I know, right? Yeah, no, we, uh We we parted ways.
Yeah, saw things differently.
So You know how it is.
This is interesting.
Oh, yeah.
You like it? Can I take a look? Oh.
Be my guest.
Get in.
Check it out.
Thank you.
Get in.
Feel the leather.
Yeah, it's a H2.
Brand-new off the line.
Slimmer than the H1 but longer, more height.
Yeah, it's a honey.
V-8 engine, 325 horsepower, tri-zone climate controls.
So you can have a girl in a bikini and another in a parka, and they're both gonna be comfortable.
You're running around with two girls in your S.
, you'd be really comfortable, huh? Oh, yeah.
I'm gonna count this quick.
Do your thing.
Make sure it's right.
We are good.
Uh, same as before.
Uh, still factory-sealed.
And, as always, you're welcome to count them.
I trust you.
Thank you.
See you next time.
Hello? Yes.
Uh, no.
But Yes, this is James McGill, but I'm no longer a lawyer, so That's right not a lawyer.
So, this is what a midlife crisis looks like? Not midlife crisis.
Midlife clarity.
Clarity? Huh.
Clearly explain to me why you walked out on the best job opportunity of your life.
Get in the pool, and I'll tell ya.
Get in the pool? Yeah.
Come on.
Just pop in the gift shop and buy a bathing suit get a one-piece, nothing fancy.
The water is perfect.
It's 82 degrees.
You can order a drink.
And you got to try this crab dip.
Why are you acting like this? I'm not acting like anything.
I just finally decided to be me.
Everything okay, Mr.
Cumpston? Would you like another drink? Uh, I'm good with this.
I'll tell you what, Mr.
If you really want to talk, I'll be in the bar.
Not for long.
Hey, Rolando.
What do What do you mean "quit the law"? I quit it.
Simple as that.
Oh, well, thanks for explaining, Jimmy.
- It's super-clear now.
- Hey, buddy? Uh, is that a misprint right there? It's got to be, right? - The Zafiro Anejo? - Yeah.
That's correct, actually, believe it or not.
Holy shit.
A $50 shot of tequila? Is it worth it? Apparently.
I mean, it's kind of a personal-choice kind of thing.
Well, I can't die without trying a $50 shot of tequila, so, uh two dos neat.
And, uh, we can charge that to the room, can't we? No, we can't.
We I am paying.
And he will be having a shot of your well brand, and I'll have a glass of your house red.
We have a Cabernet, a Pinot, and a Syrah.
Dealer's choice.
Something with alcohol.
You got it.
Jimmy did something happen in Cicero? Why did something have to happen in Cicero? Because when I talked to you about Davis & Main, you were ready to take the job.
Now you're back, and you're suddenly quitting the law, cheating hotels out of expensive liquor, wearing a weird pinkie ring? What, are you in the Mafia now? Asking if we have a future.
I mean, where did that come from? I don't know.
I just Well, Cicero has nothing to do with it.
It's my whole life.
Well, my life since Chuck made me come to Albuquerque.
Ever since I got here, all I've done is try to make Chuck happy, bend over backwards to please Chuck.
Chuck, Chuck, Chuck.
Well, no more.
You quitting the law isn't that exactly what Chuck wants? Who cares? This is for me, okay? I-I got into the law for all the wrong reasons.
I'm trusting my instincts.
I think that my talents are better spent elsewhere.
Where? Floating in somebody else's pool? Jimmy, you're a great lawyer.
Why give that up? I'm not saying it didn't have its moments, but the stuff I liked about it selling people, convincing people I don't have to be a lawyer to do that.
Besides, people tell me how they see me, and it's not as a lawyer.
All right.
Here you go.
Thank you.
Lemme know if I can get you guys anything else, okay? Bobby, what up, brother man? Oh, thanks.
Short it.
Short it.
Short it.
Short that shit.
That stock is useless.
It's got no legs.
It's like a circus freak minus the fun.
And that one's even worse.
Who's giving you these? Please do me a favor.
Take a pillow, put it over that stock's face until you hear the deathbed queef.
- It's a loser.
- Okay, so if you're not gonna be a lawyer, then what? Float around and wait for your Sandpiper money to roll in? No.
That could take years.
Sandpiper has no bearing on this at all.
Yeah, it's got legs.
Okay, then, what's the plan? To be open to the universe.
Okay, so no plan.
Just walk the Earth, like Jules at the end of "Pulp Fiction"? Look, whatever the universe presents, whatever opportunity arises, I will take it.
- Whatever opportunity? - Yeah.
Wasn't Davis & Main an opportunity? It's a great opportunity, and you're walking away from it.
Not him, not the guy who Look, shouldn't you at least try the job before you say no? And waste everyone's time, including my own? Kim, I appreciate your concern, but it's not for me.
I don't want it.
Jimmy, do you remember how long you studied for that bar? How hard you worked? All that effort, you're just gonna toss it away? That's the Sunk Cost Fallacy.
W The what? The Fallacy of Sunk Cost It's what gamblers do.
They throw good money after bad thinking they can turn their luck around.
It's like, "I've already spent this much money or time whatever.
I got to keep going!" No, there's no reward at the end of this game.
You are making a mistake.
I know you're making a mistake.
I've been doing the "right" thing for all these years now, and where has it gotten me? Nowhere.
I'm sorry.
I don't It's not my thing.
I don't get it.
- I just don't get it.
- It's what's right for me.
Donkey balls.
Pure donkey balls, dude.
Wall Street's for suckers.
Who needs that aggravation? If the the Oracle doesn't have to live there, then I sure as hell don't.
I can make a million-dollar stock trade on my laptop sitting on a toilet.
Like Midas, shitting gold bricks on my throne.
That's why Speigelman and Deitch want my business so bad.
I'm a golden God.
Look, of course I remember that.
Who forgets a thing like that? That fart had the anger of a repressed minority community.
You fart like that in someone's face, you're gonna give them pinkeye for life.
Good convo, bro.
Till next time, brutha-man.
- Flip side.
On it.
- Come with me.
- What? - Just come on.
Trust me.
What are you gonna do? You want to understand what I'm talking about? Follow my lead.
Hey, buddy, could you settle a bet for us? - I what? - Uh, sorry.
I don't want to make it sound like I was eavesdropping, but I kind of was.
Uh, we heard you talking about stocks.
Yeah, so, question if you could settle a debate between me and my sister.
Uh, you know what? We probably shouldn't be bothering this We wouldn't normally do this Right? but we need an expert.
This guy sounds like he knows his stuff.
Yeah, go.
Here's the question.
Uh, when it comes to the stock market, is there, like, a financial limit to how much a person's allowed to invest? A limit? No.
No limit.
Knew it.
Oh, even if it's an inheritance? You know, with, like, inheritance taxes and whatnot? Nope.
That's Oh, fantastic.
Thank you, buddy.
See? No limit.
Told you we could invest it all.
And it's a smart move, too.
Sticking it all in the bank? No.
Um, yeah.
You can invest all your money.
Just make sure you diversify.
That's You got to Oh, hey, um What do you mean, "diversify"? Well, diversify is Y-You know that saying, "Don't put all your eggs in one basket," right? Same principle.
No, it makes complete sense.
Thank you.
Now, if I had an idea of the money we're talking about Ballpark I could give you examples of smart diversification.
Yeah, um Look, an uncle on our father's side recently passed, and he left us somewhere in the neighborhood of $1.
4 million.
And I don't mean to be greedy, but I think, if we invest it smart now, we could double it, triple it we could quadruple the whole inheritance, right? In my opinion? Fortune favors the bold, man.
Now, if you guys are free to join me for a drink, I can give you a quick consult.
That's all right.
We were gonna do it ourselves through one of those online brokerage websites.
We're just gonna pick, uh, a classic, like I think they're called blue-chip stocks? Yeah, yeah, yeah, you can totally do it yourself.
Shoot for the tried and true.
'Course, you might be putting your cash in the Hindenburg, the Andrea Doria, uh"Corky Romano.
" Right? They all seemed rock-solid beforehand, but then Yeah, not good.
Not good, yeah.
So, how do you know? Well, that's where someone like myself comes in.
Proven track record as a wealth manager.
I take calculated but aggressive risks 'cause I want to catch lightning.
And I do.
Practically a money-printing machine.
That sounds good.
A money-printing machine.
Listen, there's a little booth over here.
There's some privacy.
We can talk.
No obligations.
We can just just rap about this a little bit.
- Yeah, I guess.
- Yeah? What do you say, sis? Can we just talk? Electric slide on in there.
And we'll just rap a little bit.
It's no My name's Ken, by the way.
Uh, Viktor, with a "K.
" Cool.
Viktor with a "K.
" And this lovely lady is? It's Giselle.
Giselle Saint Claire.
Ah, lovely.
Please, sit.
I won't bite.
So, Viktor with a "K" and Giselle exotic names.
They're Dutch.
Well, Boer, to be precise.
Our father's side of the family is from South Africa, which is where uncle Humphrey passed away.
South Africa.
They grow them beautiful down there, right? Charlize Theron.
And you.
Well I've never actually been, but hope to go someday.
Tell you what, by the time I'm done with you two, you might be taking your own private jet.
Excuse me.
Uh, we are sitting here now, so, uh, we could use a wine list, if you get a chance Hey, uh, are a tequila fan? Yes.
You down for that? You ever try Zafiro Anejo? No, I have not, but I'm down for whatever.
Three of whatever she just said.
- You got it.
- All right.
So, stock market.
A great investment.
And you're picking the right time to jump in.
Why do you listen to me? I'm an idiot.
And talks about his cars, talks about - How many cars did he have? - I don't think - It doesn't make sense.
- That's it, Ken.
Oh, yeah.
Compliments of the bartender.
She thought you might want a souvenir.
Oh, my God.
Did we drink the entire bottle? Not yet, we didn't.
- Boom.
- Hey, hey, cheers.
Uh, I think we're ready for the check.
No, really, it's the smart way to go.
But, so, to be clear, you take the money directly from our account and invest it.
- Diversify.
- Diversify it.
And then all the dividends and all the profits and thewhat-have-you comes back into our account.
And you'll get a detailed statement showing you how much your money is growing biggest bulls of the month, et cetera.
Ken, buddy let's do this.
Right there, Viktor with a "K," and, Giselle, you are next.
- This is so exciting.
- Mm-hmm.
Folks, it's been a pleasure.
- Oops, I got that.
- Can't let you do it, son.
What? Ken, you are the greatest.
- Thank you.
- No problem-o.
Hey, this will be the best decision you'll ever make.
Oh, I believe it.
All right, well, we should get out of your hair.
- Yeah.
- Oh, wait, wait.
This is for you.
Now, that's got all my contact info.
Call me anytime with questions or anything at all.
Call me, guys.
- Bye.
- Try and stop us.
Just wow.
What I Is this right? Yes, sir, it is.
Go, go, go, go, go! - Zafiro Anejo! - Shh! He's gonna come out.
Oh, no.
I didn't read the fine print.
- Wait.
- Yeah! Holy crap.
I can't b Can I borrow that when you're done? No, that's gross.
H-how is it gross? Our germs have already intermingled.
It's my toothbrush.
It's different.
Why is it different? Because.
You know, gums bleed, and there's there's cold sores, all sorts of food and weir Let me see that.
Come on.
What? No! Come on! I'll do it right now.
- I don't care.
- I need to brush my teeth.
I don't have an extra.
It's not my problem.
That's fine.
I got this.
I'm fine with this.
Yeah, me too.
Wait till you see what I floss with.
That's a keeper.
Thank you, Viktor with a "K.
" Hey, wouldn't it be great if we could do that every night? Yes, it would.
But We can't.
I know, yeah.
But I'm just saying, if we could, it would be great.
But I know we can't.
Oh, crap.
I can't be late today.
Howard is doling out assignments, and the last one through the door could get stuck in doc review.
You got somewhere to go? Yeah.
Uh, yeah, I got somewhere.
You good? Yeah.
All good.
Daniel Wormald? I'm Officer Baker.
This is Officer Saxton.
Yeah, please.
Come on in.
Come in.
It's over here.
See what they did? I mean, all gone.
All of them, just Uh, what's all gone? I have I had a baseball-card collection a major collection All stolen.
Oh, sorry to hear that.
Uh, was it common knowledge that you have baseball cards? No, not really.
So, nobody in particular you can think of wanting them? No.
Not that I No.
How'd they get in? Uh, the back door over here.
It was open when I came home for lunch.
I mean, it was locked, but they must have jimmied it open or something.
At what time, uh, you figure this happened? I left for work at 8:15, came home for lunch at 12:30, and called you immediately.
Was anything else taken? Cash a fair bit.
Uh, um How much cash? Uh, I don't know.
You know, let's focus on what's important here, you know? All I really care about are my baseball cards.
You know, I have a Topps Mickey Mantle rookie card that's irreplaceable.
It's a mint, 60/40, 90/10 on the reverse.
I can go on.
All my cards are in top-loaders, but if they're taken out and exposed to the elements, I mean, or creased, God forbid, I mean, you're looking at a 9-point downgrade in a matter of seconds.
I understand the first 48 hours are the most important in investigations like this, so the more time passes, I mean, the less likely we are of a recovery.
Sotime is of the essence here, guys.
Well, we're gonna help you out the best we can, Mr.
Wellthey really tossed this place.
I mean, are you sure they weren't looking for anything else? Like what? I don't know.
J-Just wondering your thoughts.
I assume more baseball cards.
Did you have more baseball cards than the ones you keep locked in that case here? Yes, in in back thousands.
But these were the crown jewels over here.
You know, t-the all-star lineup.
What? Just trying to make sense of it.
What's to make sense of? I mean, isn't it as simple as the perp was looking for more baseball cards? Or hopped up on speed or whatever and went nuts with the vandalism? Yeah.
I mean, that could be.
Pretty sweet Hummer parked in the driveway.
That yours? Yeah, that's mine.
Uh, it's a lease.
Got a great deal on it.
It's very sweet.
You know, they say Arnold Schwarzenegger is the reason that Hummers exist.
I don't know how, but that's what they say.
- No kidding.
- Yeah.
What kind of work do you do, Mr.
Wormald? Uh, I work I.
, uh, for a pharmaceutical company.
God, I should've gotten into computers.
- I'd have that same Hummer.
- Yeah, right.
Look, guys, I'm glad you like my car, but I think we're looking through the wrong end of the telescope here.
You know, the priority is my baseball cards.
Of course.
Yes, now, I have a detailed manifest of my entire collection and asterisks next to the high-ticket items, so it's clear which ones they're gonna try to fence first, 'cause they're super, super valuable.
So you're gonna want to get this list out to pawnshops, uh, collectors, question anyone who's done any sort of crime like this in the past.
You know, the the usual suspects.
Uh, can I get you the list so you can start investigating? Yeah, you Yeah, if you could get us that list Okay, I'll I'll print it out.
Hank Aaron, mint.
God, my signed Derek Jeter.
Willie Mays, O-Pee-Chee.
Got to breathe.
Just keep breathing.
Keep breathing.
- Okay.
- I know, right? - Left the TV.
- Uh-huh.
- Left the computer.
- Right.
There's something wrong with this picture.
Hey, it's me.
Another perfect day in paradise out here.
I'm in the pool.
Okay, call me.
- Hi! How are you? - Hey, babe.
Did you get lunch? I did.
You know, I think I'm burning up back here.
Oh, really? Well, you're just in luck.
- Look what I have.
- Oh, hey, great.
Oh, yeah, you're all red back here.
That feels good, babe.
I told you not to spend so much time in the sun.
You don't listen.
Yeah, it's me again.
Listen, as I speak, not 25 feet away from me, I'm looking at the mark.
Think Thurston Howell III if he shacked up with Ginger.
He's dripping in Gucci.
It's like I'm at the watering hole, and I'm watching the fattest, slowest water buffalo expose his neck to me, and I'm the lioness ready to strike.
Come, Kim.
Join me.
Join the pride.
Um, I said "lioness" because it's the females who do all the hunting.
Uh, just wanted to be species-accurate, irrespective of my own sex.
It's a National Geographic thing.
Anyway Get out here.
Santa Fe, New Mexico.
I need the number of a law firm Davis & Main.
Yeah, you can connect me.
Davis & Main.
There are a few options on the company cars.
We can arrange a test-drive whenever you'd like.
Company car wow.
And there's a service that will deliver it right to you, wherever you want.
And if you find you're not happy with it, it's not a big deal to change it out.
That sounds really, uh Yeah.
This is, uh, interesting.
Oh, if, uh If this isn't to your taste, we have a collection of art in-house you can, uh, choose from.
Anytime you're ready, I can put together some samples for you to review.
I I No, I like this.
Uh, well, any other needs you have, I'm here to help.
Office supplies, dietary needs Anything special you want stocked in the fridge? Uh, maybe a humidifier? Gets kind of dry in here.
Omar, I I'm pretty low-maintenance.
Well, if there's anything you need, I'm right outside the door.
If I think of anything.
Hey, do you think, um I'm just looking at this.
D-Do we get a choice of desks? What were you thinking? Um is it possible, um Can we do cocobolo? Cocobolo desk? Absolutely.
I'll get right on that.

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