Boy Meets World s06e14 Episode Script

Getting Hitched

Previously on Boy Meets World So, is this what you're doing for kicks now? Hustling students out of their tuition money? I'm not hustling, I'm teaching! I'm teaching them not to play pool with a stranger, especially when that stranger's me.
Come on, boys, give your daddy a big hug! You always do this, over and over and over again.
You come into town, you make all these promises, and just when I think we're actually gonna get close, you take off again.
Oh, my God.
I'm you.
Shawn's father had a heart attack.
I should be putting my arms around him and telling him that I love him.
But I can't, Cory, because I am still so angry at him.
I need you, Dad.
I need you, too, Son.
We lost him.
I'm sorry, boys.
Oh, I'd know those hands anywhere.
Shawn.
How you doing, honey? Sorry.
I was just hoping it would be Shawn.
I know you're worried about him.
Yeah, I mean, since his dad's funeral, I can't reach him.
I don't know what to do.
Well, I have something that might cheer you up.
Is it Shawn? No, The Fiancee Game.
I was gonna get this for you for a gift! You lie! I swear.
You know, it's supposed to tell you if you're ready to get married.
Trust me, I'm ready.
Well, we could play right now if we had another couple.
Hey, Cor, Pangers.
No.
Oh, come on, we'll kill them.
Eric, you want to play a game? Oh, what do you got, Perquackey? The Fiancee Game.
It's for engaged couples.
Oh.
I was almost engaged once.
We planned our whole futures together.
I hope he dies.
We don't actually have to be engaged to play the game, do we? Not just dies.
Burns.
'Cause that would be okay with me.
I want to step on his face with a golf shoe.
That's very hostile.
Will you marry me? Hey, why not? We already live together, right? That's right.
Yeah, we've actually been living together ever since she moved in.
You guys are gonna be toast.
Cory and I have been together for 17 years.
We'll kick your butts.
Now all we need is somebody to read the questions.
Mmm, no problemo.
Hang on.
Feeny? I said, F-F-F-F-Feeny! Come on, George Feeny, don't act like you don't know me.
Come on, we need you over here.
Hang on.
Get to stepping.
Hey, guys, this is gonna be great.
This dude can totally read.
Eric, I've told you a thousand times, leave me alone.
Afternoon, all.
How can I help? We're playing a game and we want you to be the moderator.
You interrupted my quiet cup of coffee for Ooh! The Fiancee Game.
Goody! Okay, couples, take your seats and let's play The Fiancee Game.
This is gonna be so much fun.
Hey, what's going on? I left, like, 10 messages.
Why didn't you call me back? 'Cause I don't want to.
Look, Shawn, we need to go down to Dad's trailer.
What's the rush? Look, I know how hard this is, man, I really do, but we need to go through his stuff.
You do it.
Throw everything out.
You done? Yeah.
But Shawn, you grew up there, all right? You know what everything means.
I wish I did, but I don't.
You want to know what everything means? Yeah, I want you to come down and tell me.
No, I can tell you right here.
I had a lousy relationship with my father that I don't want to relive, so I ain't going.
Shawn, we need to go down, okay? We owe it to Chet.
We don't need to do anything.
What does that mean? It means that Chet was the only real link between us, so now that he's gone, I don't think you owe anybody anything.
I'll do it myself.
Hey, Shawn, uh, your brother called a half hour ago.
Yeah, he got the message.
Mr.
Matthews, we're waiting.
Tuna fish.
Salmon.
Not tuna fish.
Salmon.
Do you know you haven't got one question right? You know, it is just a game, honey.
It's not just a game.
It's our future.
I hardly think this game is an indicator of our future.
Not tuna fish.
Yes, ma'am.
Okay, moving right along.
Rachel, what is Eric's favorite fish? Penguin.
No, I don't think you understood.
Bam! I know my man.
It's like we have one brain.
Yes, well, that's too easy.
Not one question right.
It's a game.
The questions were ridiculous.
A relationship is not based on fish.
You didn't know I was right-handed.
Okay, that was bad.
We don't know each other at all.
I think we have run out of time.
Uh, good night, everyone.
We won! Oh! Hey, we know each other pretty darn well, don't we? Yeah.
But how did you know that when I shower Oh, that's not important.
We won! We are so in sync it's scary.
You know, this really tells me something about us.
Yeah, well, we are good together, Eric.
Yeah, we are.
Okay, I'll see you at home.
Okay, I'll see you.
Bye.
Honey.
Eric and Rachel know more about each other than we do.
Topanga, it was a game, a stupid game! You know what this means we have to do, don't you? Topanga, it was a stupid, lousy, rotten game! Live together.
That game's a genius! Come here, you! Aw, jeez, where do I begin? Hey, change your mind? I didn't mean we're not brothers.
Oh, hey, forget about it.
I just meant that with, you know, all this stuff that's going on between me and Angela, Cory and Topanga together all the time, and now Dad dying, I don't really feel connected to anything.
Hey, I'm here for you, man.
All right, thanks, man.
No problem.
Okay, so, let's do this.
Yeah.
Wow.
Oh, hey, his financial portfolio.
Oh, my God! Do you know what this is? What? His unemployment stub number one.
Dad always considered this his first honest money.
Hmm.
Let's see here.
Okay.
"Past due.
"Final notice.
Pay up.
"We're not kidding this time.
" Why would he want to save these? Well, Dad was a sentimental guy.
This one's weird.
What? It's a letter to Chet from your stepdad.
Oh, hey, that's nothing.
I'll just take that.
No, no, no.
"Don't worry about paying me back, Chet.
"Shawn is Jack's brother, so he's practically family.
"We're happy to help out.
" Yeah, that's nothing.
No, no, pay him back for what? Nothing.
For your shirt.
Pay him back for what? For your tuition.
For college? You know Yeah, Chet just couldn't afford it Wait, no, you and your stepdad decided to make us the charity case of the year? Your dad wanted you to go to college so bad that he came to my stepfather for help.
Can you imagine how hard that was for him? What else did you get me, Jack? Nothing.
That was it.
Books? Did you buy my books? Maybe some books.
My shirt? Really? I would never pay for that shirt.
Come on, man.
I'm just trying to help out.
That's what families do.
We help out each other.
How have I helped you out? What? We're family, right? Tell me one thing that I've done to help you out.
Here, take this.
Doesn't belong to me.
Nothing belongs to me.
The door's open.
Say! Eric! You weren't expecting me, were you, Hef? What is it? Topanga's coming over.
Well, you saw how in sync Rachel and I were.
It's obvious to me that we were meant to be together.
Congratulations and get out.
No, see, that's not the problem.
Congratulations and get out.
The problem is Jack.
I mean, ever since Rachel moved in, we've had this unspoken competition between the two of us.
Sometimes at night, I imagine he gets killed.
No, look, Jack is my best friend, okay? And I just want to make sure that if this thing works out with Rachel that, you know, he's gonna be okay with it.
All right, listen, if you and Rachel really care about each other, then I'm sure Jack will understand.
Really? Do you think so? I couldn't care less.
Now get out.
You're a good brother, Cor.
Out.
Hey, Topanga.
Ooh, what'd you bring, toys? Hey.
What do you think of my silk pajamas, huh? They cost me $2,000.
They're nice.
Cory, why are the beds pushed together? Oh, well, we are gonna be living together.
I just, uh, assumed that Cory.
You and I are living together to get closer as a couple.
This needs to be an ordinary night where we behave just as ourselves.
Nothing special.
Sex is the last thing we should be doing.
You are wrong.
You just are! But I'm looking very forward to spending all the next few days together getting to know you better than I ever have before.
Huh.
Well, if I would have known we were just gonna do that, I would have bought the flannel pajamas with the feet instead of the silk pajamas and the silk blanket and these silk sheets! And now I got blood on them! You sure you didn't buy these, too? Don't take those off! I don't want to spend my life being a handout case, Jack.
I understand how you feel.
No, you don't! You don't.
You know, I don't expect you to.
It's not your fault.
You know, I appreciate what you and your stepdad did for me.
Then why can't you just accept it and move on? Move on from what? Nothing is what I thought it was.
I don't know what I am anymore.
You're my brother in his underwear.
Now, would you please get dressed? I'm gonna pay you back for everything.
You wanna pay me back? I'm gonna pay you back.
Let me know who my father was.
What? Yeah.
Why do you think I wanted to come down here so badly? I wanted to find out just a little something about him.
You already knew more about him than I did.
No, no, the important stuff, man.
I mean, at least you have memories with him.
I mean, I was gone before I could have any, and now he's gone, and I guess I'll never have any.
That's probably a good thing.
How? 'Cause you're okay.
You're the lucky one, Jack.
There's no need for you to go through this kind of pain.
I mean, you look nice.
It's face cream, Cory.
It keeps my skin soft.
Take it off.
It scares me.
Cory Matthews steps up to the plate.
Clemens digs in, checks the runner on first, delivers the pitch, and Ow! Ow! Oh! What? Oh, get it off of me! Get it off of me! Oh, take it easy, you baby.
It's just a toenail.
Which toe? The big daddy.
When did you last clip it? I don't know.
A year ago? Ugh! Get it off of me.
Get it It's stuck in my face somewhere.
Topanga! Gosh, take it easy, you baby.
It's just hygiene.
You know something, Cor, I was so into my own thing, I forgot to give you a little brotherly advice on this whole living together situation.
The first thing you're gonna have to do is get rid of the alien.
You know, call Mulder and Scully.
They'll know what to do.
Eric, it's me.
Pangy? Damn, girl, you look bad! Oh, and you got a toenail right here.
Look at that.
Ground rule double? Yeah, off the Green Monster.
All right! Hey, I'm up, I'm up, I'm up! Get out of here! All right, all right, all right, fine.
I got my own little kumquat at home, no big deal.
But I do want to do this before I leave.
Ew! All right, peace.
I'm out, all right? Cory, even that knows you better than I do.
Oh, relax.
It's just because Eric and I have lived together.
Maybe this wasn't such a good idea.
No, no, no, it is.
Listen, anytime you and I are together, it is always a good idea.
Okay.
I'm just gonna go wash my face.
Maybe then we can go to sleep.
Yeah, I'm just gonna get ready for bed.
Okay.
One, two, three four, five, six, seven, eight, nine, 10.
Please bless my mother and my father, and please let the new baby be healthy and live a good life and be a good person.
And please bless Eric and Morgan and Jack and Shawn.
And please help them get through this tough time.
And please take care of Chet.
And please don't let Shawn get too crazy.
And please bless Angela, and please let them always be together.
I mean, not that I'm pushing one way or the other.
It's just that I want everybody to be happy.
And please bless Topanga.
And thank you so much for bringing her to me.
And please let us always be together, no matter what happens.
Even if we're not completely compatible, please, just let us learn to be completely compatible.
And please bless Cory, who's the greatest guy I've ever known and I can't wait to spend the rest of my life with.
You know why? Why? Because I want to change everything about you.
Oh, hey, Rach.
Hey, Jack.
So, how did it go down at the trailer park? Shawn came down.
He did? Well, that's great.
Is he okay? Oh, I don't know.
Oh, I hope so.
Well, how about you? Oh, I'm fine.
You know, I'm good.
See, I'm the lucky one 'cause, uh, you know, I don't have to go through any of that pain.
You know, I just I didn't even know him.
I know.
I know.
It's okay, it's okay.
No.
You know, it's, um It's just that I'm trying real hard not to get In the way of his grief.
But I'll just I'll never get to know my real dad.
I know, Jack, but you can't keep this inside.
You just can't.
Yes, I can.
It's okay, it's okay.
It's okay.
It's okay.
Jack.
Hey.
Hey.
Thanks for letting me have the room last night.
No sweat.
So? So, do you know what the best part about being a virgin is? What? No, I'm asking.
So how you doing? You okay? I've been so angry I haven't been able to see straight.
Yeah, I kind of noticed.
But now that Angela's not in my life anymore, my dad's gone, I figure it's a good chance for me to get out of here.
Yeah, definitely.
I mean, um, you don't want to be hanging around in this trailer.
So come back to the dorm, you know.
We'll talk.
You and Topanga aren't living together anymore? Yeah, but only during the day.
At night, she's scary.
But, uh, I love her, and we have our whole lives to live together and know each other.
I'm happy for you, Cory.
Thank you.
But I think I need to break away for a while, clear my head, find out who I am.
Shawn, you just lost your father.
He left me this trailer.
It's all he had.
And eventually, I'm gonna have to sell it off and start paying back some debts, but in the meantime, I was going to hitch it up and hit the open road.
Thought maybe you'd come with me.
What, you mean for the weekend? Yeah, for the weekend.
Yeah, sure! Whoo-hoo! You know, we're young, we're wild.
Can I drive? No.
All right, but I got shotgun.
Shawn, I don't understand why it was so important that we come here.
I want to say good-bye to Topanga.
Yeah, but we're going away for the weekend.
I'm not even saying good-bye to her.
We're here, okay? Okay, but I wouldn't go in there.
I'm just saying good-bye.
Sheryl Swoopes dribbles down the lane.
She squares off to the basket, shoots! Ow! Scores! Whoo-hoo! What the heck was that? She's beautiful, isn't she? She looks like the Swamp Thing.
I know.
Let's go.
Good-bye, Topanga.

Previous EpisodeNext Episode