Bump (2021) s02e07 Episode Script


Oh, come on!
Hey, Madison.
What are you doing right now?
Um, uh, studying.
I'm stuck in my house.
The doors are deadlocked.
Do you have a crowbar or something?
- Yes!
Yes. Sorry.
I've just always wanted
a reason to use a crowbar.
Such a g-tool.
But yes, definitely,
I will come right away,
I'll just put my shoes on and I'm off.
You didn't tell me
you guys were evicted.
(STAMMERS) What's going on?
Just pry the window open.
Just just go harder.
Get in there.
This is, uh, starting
to feel like, uh, jail.
Nobody's calling the cops around here.
Easy for you to say. You're
not the one with the crowbar.
- Oh! Ay-oh.
- Oh!
- Hello.
- Hi.
Hey, also, do you have a spare mattress?
- (MADISON LAUGHS) You were.
- I don't stare at you.
- I could barely sleep because of you.
- No, you could.
- You snore.
- Actually, I'll catch you later, yeah?
- MADISON: OK, see you.
Hey, Reema.
Something's going down with Madison.
She's been evicted. She tell you?
She mentioned it,
but I didn't realise
something actually happened.
Who's she staying with?
Well, she slept at my house last night.
On a mattress. FYI, she
snores. It's prehistoric.
I thought your mum had a
'no girls' sleepover policy.
Mum was on the late, so I snuck her in.
I couldn't just leave
her out on the street.
She has other mates, but OK.
Nothing happened.
It's OK, even if it did.
Hey, I'm running late, so
- What about Meghan Markle?
- No, I don't
I don't really have
an opinion about her.
I'm talking about her hair.
You would look so cute
with it straightened.
She doesn't look like a
genuinely happy person.
She's fakin' it!
(EXCLAIMS) We all fake it.
Dale! Try a new
hairstyle. Be a new Rosa!
I don't want to be a new Rosa!
I want to be me!
But with the part that
feels like shit cut out.
The shit part isn't you, it's Matias.
So you think I should leave him?
Say it.
How good does this feel, huh?
Endorphins, vitamin D, oxygen:
you'll feel great in no time, darling.
I feel fine.
You're the one that
wants the revenge body.
Why would I want a revenge body?
I don't want to know the answer to that.
Well, if you must know, I've
got a work reunion coming up
and I've been asked to
give the retirement speech
to my old boss and I
don't even work there.
Which proves that once you go Dom
you can never get enough Dom.
Didn't they fire you?
Well, it was a mutual decision
and I needed to spread my wings,
hence my Brover app.
All right, so this has
nothing to do with Birdie?
Why would you say that?
Because I've literally never
seen you exercise before.
Well, I've never seen
you exercise before.
OK, Dad, you're sounding
a little bit delusional.
Well, you're sounding delusional too.
Well, Bowie told me
that Birdie ghosted you.
Well, Bowie can get
stuffed. I'm already over it.
Yeah, sounds like
you're already over it.
Dad, you don't have to walk so fast.
Dad, stop!
DOM: You stop!
- Are you OK?
- 'Course.
Did you pull a hammy?
As if.
Oh, damn. Close.
Oh, hi, poppet. Want
to borrow the car keys?
Uh, no, I'm sleeping
at my friend's house.
- OK.
- Got your heart pills.
- They got legs.
- Yeah.
So, um, when do you think
they'll let us back in the apartment?
(SIGHS) I think that
ship has sailed, sweetie.
Yeah, cool.
No worries.
We'll find another place.
Something will pop up.
- Mm.
- You'll see.
When was the last time you ate?
I'm getting you a burger.
Wait. Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait.
It's on Nellie.
Get something for
yourself. Keep the change.
Are you sure?
Plenty more where that came from.
Time to go, Vince.
I was looking for the bathroom.
- No, you weren't.
- Yeah, you're right.
I have superhuman bladder control.
- Let's go.
- But is your dad OK?
But does he know about the eviction?
Der! Of course he knows.
Is he gonna help? Maybe stop
flushing money down the toilet?
As opposed to flushing
your freakishly big head?
My God, he's so hot!
- So you should go over and say hi!
- No, I'm married.
- Two margaritas for the ladies.
- ROSA: Yes, thank you.
- Can I get you anything else?
- No, bye.
You get a free pass.
- Use it!
- Mmm.
(SIGHS) Yeah.
Now go ride a fucking dolphin!
- Hi.
- Hi, Rosa, how are you?
Tipsy. (GIGGLES)
We lost count of our margaritas.
- You know how that goes.
- I do, actually.
It's so great to see you.
We should get a drink sometime.
No, but, yes, but I'm so busy, you know?
Oh, come on. Just one drink.
How's tomorrow night?
My friends and I are coming
back here to see this amazing DJ.
You should join us.
- Yes No, I'm I'm busy.
- She's free.
Sounds like you've got nothing on.
Oh! (LAUGHS) Stop it.
You're making it sound
like I'll be going naked.
- No!
- Oh! Come on, Vince!
- What are you doing?
- Whoa! Ah, yep.
- Back me up!
- Um, sure.
What? Who uses nuts as
weapons against squirrels?
Who comes to the forest
to fight against squirrels
in the first place?
- Vince!
- What? It's their forest.
- Ugh!
- Oh, we're the bad guys!
I see.
- Oh! Arggh! Oh!
- GAME: You lose.
- All right.
Let's give it another go. I
want you on point this time.
I'm kinda tired.
And ethically conflicted.
- Can we stop?
- And do what?
I don't know, chat and stuff?
Does your dad know
where you slept last night?
Because maybe if you told
him it'll help him realise
Oh, my God, I'm 16. I
can sleep wherever I want.
In fact, I can do anything I want.
What do you want to do, though?
About your situation?
You mean besides taking a ton of drugs
and maybe joining a cult?
Can you set up my bed?
Uce! Doin'?
- How's J?
- Yeah, she's good, bro.
- That's good.
- What's the rush, man?
Discount devil wings are on Tuesday.
Good one. No. I'm on a mission.
Madison left my house last
night and she's missing.
- Madison?
- Yeah.
- Left your house?
- It's not like that.
- Trust me, it's not like that.
- Yes, it is. Are you two
- No, no, no, no.
- Are you?
She slept at my house because
her dad's in a tough situation
and I'm just trying to help her out.
Oh, right.
She OK?
I don't know. I think?
She hasn't answered
any of my calls, so
I don't know.
Well, maybe you should
just get one of the girls
to check in for you, bro.
See, I didn't think about
that. That's a good one.
Are you all good? (LAUGHS)
Whoa. It's J.
- Yeah. All good. All good.
- Obviously.
- I should
- You should probably
- BOTH: Yeah.
- Anyways
- Back on the mission.
- Later, G.
- Oi, keep me in the loop, yeah?
- Yeah, yeah, I got you.
- Good luck, uce.
- TALIA: Hey!
- ZAC: Hey, yo!
Have y'all seen Madison?
Ooh, why are you asking?
I haven't seen her, that's all.
- Oh! You said it!
- I told you! I said it!
- ZAC: You actually said it!
- What?
- What?
- It's Madison, OK?
She does her own thing.
Try not to worry, lover boy!
ou guys might want to
check your radar there.
- Oh, yeah.
- Sure, dude, yeah.
- Sure.
- Serious.
- Have you seen her or not?
- Why are you so worried?
- Why aren't you worried?
- Wait, did you mess things up?
- What's that supposed to mean?
- He messed things up!
- You guys are useless.
- Dude, we're kidding!
We're kidding!
- He used to be chill.
- So chill.
It's ringing.
Hey, Mads.
Just checking in, making
sure you're all right.
OK, bye.
What did she say?
She said, "Suck my clit."
She sounds high.
I'm gonna go look for her.
You seem pretty invested.
She has no-one right now.
So you're gonna go skip
school to look for her?
I didn't even know you
guys were that close.
(SCOFFS) I'm allowed to worry about her.
All I'm saying is everyone needs help.
Some of us need help moving
the blocks in the drama room
so we can rehearse after school.
Or just, like, hang out, whatever.
Thank you for your help, Reema.
No worries.
Oh, my God, what was that?
Did I come across as
pathetically jealous or what?
Mm-mm, nuh. You just
sounded platonically content.
This makes no sense.
I friend-zoned him. Why am I so jealous?
This is so embarrassingly primal.
Maybe you need to redefine the
relationship in a way that works
so that you don't feel jealous.
- Yeah, totally.
- Yeah?
You could
You could come up with a list
of no-go areas of conversation.
Like, talking about romantic
potentials, for example -
no go.
You could email him and you
could agree on certain terms,
sort of like a like
an informal contract.
That just sounds like
I'd be turning into
a possessive girlfriend
without any of the authority.
I guess it's sort of a grey area.
- Oh, my God!
What's that test, the Bechdel test,
where girls keep talking about boys?
We're totally failing.
Oh, yeah!
Ah, Vince! (LAUGHS)
- About time!
- You were expecting me?
I wasn't not expecting you.
Nang it up, buddy.
All right, all cool.
Vince, Vincey, best guy in the world,
Such an amazing friend.
Is everything OK?
Yeah, why?
You kinda left without
saying anything last night.
Oh, yeah, meh.
- 'Meh'?
I was actually kinda worried about you.
(LAUGHS) Chill, dude,
you're overreacting.
I lied to my mum for you.
(LAUGHS) You're worried
about that. OK, mummy's boy.
That's the last time
I ever help you, OK?
You know what? I take back all
that "amazing friend" stuff I said.
Are you serious, Madison?
Do you even know what a friend is?
'Cause a friend is
someone who has your back.
And you can't have someone's
back if you're hurting them.
From now on, everyone's
gonna start considering me
and my feelings, OK?
I'm not just some limitless
source of of niceness
that people can come, use
and abuse and ditch whenever.
I have limits too.
You sure had that loaded.
- You sure that was for me?
- There's no-one else here.
Who else would I be talking to?
All right, whatever.
Now, if you don't mind,
we gettin' high!
You should all be at school anyway.
Dude, look who's talking?!
And then I say, "I think
I speak for everyone,
everyone, that is, except
for Shelly." (LAUGHS)
Everyone laughs uproariously,
etc, etc, etc, then I bow.
What do you think?
- Who's Shelly?
- Shelly's his ex-wife.
- She still works there.
- Are you sure about that joke?
Uh, what's wrong with it?
Just the bit about the son being
a flake. It's not too harsh?
Why is it harsh? He's a flake.
That's why it's funny.
So his wife has left him.
(LAUGHS) Yeah.
He's about to be unemployed.
(LAUGHS) Absolutely.
And his son is a flake.
Doesn't that sound a
little bit familiar?
To who?
To you.
Oh, come on, darling, you've
got to be nicer to your brother.
Dad, I'm not talking about my brother,
I'm talking about you!
You have zero self-awareness.
Well, here's some
self-awareness for you.
You're a slow exerciser,
and I'm finished and I'm going home.
All right, well, here is
some self-awareness for you.
You're actually not going home.
I'm going home and you're
going to that weird apartment.
Welcome, ladies and gentlemen, welcome.
It's so wonderful to be here tonight
with so many of you to celebrate
Eric's multiple corporate achievements
before we send him off
into the post-work afterlife.
Now, uh, some of you might think of this
as a retirement speech,
but I prefer to call this
a living person's eulogy.
And then everyone cracks up
into uncontrollable laughter,
and I am t
Oh, Christ, Dom.
What is wrong with you?
I'm just taking it easy.
It's just a night out, like any other.
Huh! Like any other.
It's not like any other, is it?
This was a mistake.
- Come on, let's go talk to him.
- No, no. Maybe we should go.
- Let's go.
- HECTOR: Rosa.
- It's so good to see you.
I didn't think you would show up.
No, well, you know,
I'm full of surprises.
I'm Liz, hi. Hi, how do you do?
Liz is a friend. Well,
we were actually married.
But as it turns out, she's not into men.
But we still share a Siamese cat.
- That's so nice. (LAUGHS)
- It is, actually.
I love Siamese cats.
Oh, really?
Four years down the toilet.
You're terrible! (LAUGHS)
Get up!
Matias, Matias.
the best time ever!
Ha! Ah!
GIRL: I haven't got it now,
but I'll pay you back later.
I swear to God, I swear to
God, I literally, like
Don't feel too bad.
According to Talia, it's
her shortest AWOL yet.
VINCE: I've been thinking.
I feel kind of used up.
Don't. You did the right thing.
Hell, if I needed help
breaking out of my house,
I would have chosen you too.
I've been thinking about us, actually.
OK, look, I'll admit, I was
a bit jealous of Madison.
I didn't want to be.
I mean, it's so stupid.
It's not stupid when we both
know we should be together.
I wish I could go there, but
you know I can't.
I know.
I love hanging out with you, Reema.
You're such an amazing friend.
I think you're an amazing friend too.
It just hurts.
Like, a lot.
And I can't do it anymore.
Are you saying we can't
be friends anymore?
So that's it?
We're just gonna have
to ignore each other
till high school finishes?
I just think it's the right thing to do.
For the both of us.
- I know you say, ooh ♪
- You all good, bro?
Mm-mm ♪
- You can hold me down ♪
- Can I hold the baby?
- But I feel my name ♪
Yeah. Of course you can, man.
Never really fit your mouth ♪
The way that it falls
out and down to the ground ♪
Where it feels like your
fear gonna fight my fear ♪
By knowin' every move ♪
And drown in the sound
that don't sound right ♪
Waterin' down a bloodline ♪
The moment that you prove ♪
- (SOBS)
- There's always more ♪
But I can never have it ♪
You tell me that I'm damaged ♪
If my wounds can't fit your truth ♪
Then I'm leaving it abandoned ♪
The way that you demanded ♪
Turned me to a savage ♪
Nothing left for me to do ♪
When I cannot break your habits ♪
Here there ain't no take-backs ♪
On the things we said ♪
Wish that I could fake that ♪
But it is what it is ♪
I walk away, ooh, ooh, mm-mm ♪
So you can do what you gotta do ♪
Make your mistakes ♪
Just don't let your
mistakes make you ♪
You ♪
With nothing left to lose ♪
You're down on the
ground 'fore you realise ♪
No-one's gonna fight ♪
Your fight like ♪
The way that I used to ♪
No, no ♪
Drown in the sound of ♪
A heart cryin' ♪
Tryin' to bleed out ♪
A bloodline ♪
Still trying ♪
To prove ♪
There's always more ♪
But I can ♪
Never have it ♪
Tell me that I'm damaged ♪
If my wounds can't fit your truth ♪
Then I'm leaving it abandoned ♪
The way that you demand it ♪
Yeah ♪
Turned me to a savage ♪
Ooh, mm ♪
Nothing left for me to do ♪
When I cannot break your habits ♪
Cannot break your habits ♪
Here there ain't no take-backs ♪
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