Club De Cuervos (2015) s03e03 Episode Script
The Leftovers
1 YOU CANNOT IMPROVISE UNLESS YOU KNOW EXACTLY WHAT YOU ARE DOING.
GREECE Yo, DJ.
Play some Sean Puffy.
No, man, no.
No, Puffy, no.
Juan Gabriel.
Who is Juan Gabriel? -Aristóteles.
-Yes? -Can you push me over there? -Yeah, no problem -What's up, dude? What's new? -They don't want you.
Eliseo, don't fuck with me.
I'm the only Mexican player overseas who isn't on the national team, asshole.
I scored 18 goals in this league.
I was the first to do that.
What bothers me now, dude is what's with the bonuses? Wasn't I supposed to get a bonus if I lead the league in scoring, whatever? Absolutely nothing.
I've been waiting three months for that payment.
Take care of that.
What's with the national team? Everyone used to be nice to me, dude now they won't take my calls.
Hey.
Did you read the article? "The eight players who are killing it in Europe.
" Of course I read the article, Moi.
Whose idea do you think that was? Was it you? Well, anyway what the article says is the truth.
Yes.
And it's also true that you're 33, and running in shorts you look almost as ridiculous as Chabelo.
Well, I may be ridiculous, but the shampoo company Sócrates wants me to promote them here in Europe.
And they want me here for three years.
Well, we'll see.
Moi, your career has been amazing, you've played in two world cups.
Retire with dignity.
Comfortably.
That's what I'm talking about, dude.
I want to retire wealthy.
With the national team.
Now, the question is, do you want royalties? Well, yeah, yeah.
I'll see what I can do.
Okay? See you.
Yes.
See you.
A NETFLIX ORIGINAL SERIES He didn't give a shit about who I am.
He won't respect authority, dude.
She took us out of the VIP race with the players.
Even Pizarro was there.
Fucking arrogant bitch, dude.
She's a jerk, presumptuous, way too thin, quite attractive, fucking-- A pain in the ass, amazing, she's perfect.
You don't-- The amount of power that these brats get is unbelievable.
They're out of control.
Is she hot or what? She's hot, dude.
She doesn't have a Facebook page, I searched all day.
Facebook has these tough privacy settings, and I need information.
I gotta know if she has a dude that I need to neutralize to get her.
Although, if she was taken, she wouldn't have gone that day.
She was alone there.
Isabel! -Hey! What's up? -What's up? You didn't comb your hair today? -Where's Rafa? -He's not coming.
What? Why isn't he coming? He's been officially uninvited.
Yeah, right.
And who's going to finalize the contracts? Not him.
-I don't understand.
-Can you elaborate a little? We need a coach.
Where the fuck is Rafael? Chava.
I fired him.
-What? -Why? It's not your decision to make.
You can't decide something like that.
This is a team, dude.
-Why the fuck did you fire him? -I caught him with someone! Fuck me.
Well, my dears, I have to go.
This is something you have to deal with yourselves No, wait.
Sit.
Everything is fine.
I'm fine.
I am.
I'm fine.
What the fuck will we do now? What do you think, Chava? We'll fix this, between us.
Really? You know he was taking care of transfers? Couldn't you fire him after the draft? -No.
-Well, we're fucked, dude.
Great.
I need a drink.
Oh, Isabel Why did Rafa cheat on me? I know it isn't easy working with your wife, but it wasn't easy for me either.
Do you think it was easy? I supported him, I pushed him to be more than just a player.
Maybe men have to fuck, right? I mean, they need to fuck.
They just need to fuck everything that moves.
The human race trying to survive.
I was also an idiot, right? Marrying a soccer player.
I didn't think about it.
He ended up cheating on me.
I was so stupid.
Did you know? -About--? -It's obvious, since you won't say.
-Because of the bro code? -No.
Fucking idiots.
Okay.
I I really need to go to the washroom, if that's okay with you.
-Okay? -If you gotta go, then go.
Okay.
See you soon.
-Fede! -Yes, ma'am? Thank you for listening.
Do not apologize, you know I don't fly economy, dude.
Right, Hugo Sánchez, no first class, I won't fly.
Or get the chopper ready.
Don't argue.
Just fix it.
Bye.
Hey, Fede, you know what? It's not okay that I'm seated behind my employee.
Can I get your seat? Cuervos' policy.
Chava, Chava.
Chava.
All the seats are the same.
-Don't worry, Isabel.
Really, it's okay.
-See? -It's okay.
-We have to follow these absurd policies.
Are you okay? Please let me help you.
Go ahead.
You know what, dude? I'm such an idiot.
This is my seat.
This is my seat.
Nice.
-How are you? -Fine.
-Nice to meet you, Chava Iglesias.
-Hi.
-Are you going to Acapulco? -Yes.
-What's your name? -Valeria.
Nice to meet you.
Excuse me, is that your seat? Oh, I'm sorry.
No problem.
Pardon me, sir.
Did I step on you? Good morning.
Good morning, how are you? I heard you were talking about a great team.
Yes.
I was.
We're actually announcing something great today.
Really? -Funny, so are we.
-Well-- -I don't think it'll be as great as ours.
-Really? We're announcing a new contract with an international star.
Super-hot right now.
-Do you want a clue? -Please.
It starts with "Pi" and ends with "zarro.
" -Javier Pizarro? -That's the one! -He signed with us.
-Yeah, right! That's odd, we closed the deal last night.
We closed this morning.
He wants to live near his mom.
Don't fuck with me.
I'm not fucking with you.
-Isabel! -What? What, Chava? What? This fucker is telling me that Pizarro is with the Tarantulas.
Don't worry, Chava.
Let's call Pizarro's people to clear this up.
-Do you want his number? It's in my phone.
-We've been talking with him for weeks.
Dealing with him.
Fede, can you please give me Pizarro's number? I don't have it, Isabel.
I didn't talk to him.
-It's 55 -It's 55, 30, 26, 94, seven, four.
Seven, four.
Thank you.
Hi, Mr.
DÃaz, this is Isabel Iglesias.
Can you put the speaker on? Hi, how are you, this is Chava Iglesias.
We just heard this rumor-- You know how shitty the Tarantulas are with their deals.
They say that Pizarro is supposed to be with them.
So, we want to be clear.
Pizarro is with the Cuervos, right? Pizarro didn't have a problem being a Cuervo -Mm-hm.
-as long as Rafa was there.
But now that he isn't, things have changed.
-Yeah, but we have a contract with you.
-No.
-Miss-- -Wait a second, please.
-What? -This is important.
-One second! -Javier Pizarro admired Rafael, that's why he wanted to be a Cuervo, but since he's no longer there-- -Fuck! -What the--? Isabel! I don't care how, but Rafael has to be back today.
-Well-- -I need Rafael back.
Chava.
That's enough.
It's not possible.
You know what? They can keep Pizarro.
We're signing our players today, and they're amazingly good.
We don't need-- -Yes? -Hi.
Chava Iglesias? Yes, this is Chava Iglesias.
I'm calling on behalf of Francisco DÃaz, just found out that Pizarro didn't sign.
Yes.
What about it? Francisco DÃaz won't sign without Javier Pizarro.
-But DÃaz is with us.
-Yes, but you lost Javier Pizarro.
I know, but we have a deal-- DÃaz won't sign without Pizarro.
Don't take it the wrong way.
Why'd he give us his word then? What kind of deal is this? Hello.
Yes.
I wanted to know if-- Oh, yes, Mr.
M-- -What? -I'm getting another call.
Fuck it! Fernando just rejected us.
-Hello.
-Yes? They're independent.
Why--? What do you mean, he won't play? Nobody will sign without Pizarro.
Excuse me-- Can we get a second? Why don't you go to the back, and let us finish this? Instead of five months to prepare the team, now we only have ten hours-- Was it that hard to fuck him just one more night? -Fuckin' shit! -Fuckin' shit! We have to find every international player who hasn't signed, and get them to sign with us.
I don't give a shit if they're from Bolivia, Ecuador, or whatever.
We find them, get them, and that's it.
Chava, by now they must all have at least handshake deals.
We need the national talent.
The Mexicans.
No, Fede! No! The Tarantulas just destroyed our lineup.
If we don't do something big, something relevant, our fans will follow them, and we won't get the stadium back.
-Okay? -Okay.
Fine.
Fine.
-I'll help you.
-Yes, well-- -Yes? Chava Iglesias.
-Chava! Carlos Diego, from the Pumas.
How are you? Charlie, what can I help with? Rafa told me he's no longer with you, and rumor has it that you're interested in selling Potro.
Yes! Indeed we are-- Can you hold on a moment please? -The Pumas want Potro.
-What? Sorry.
Yes, he's available.
And we're really happy about it, since he's recovering faster than doctors anticipated.
So, to get him it would cost -One million.
-Don't fuck with me, I'm not an idiot.
I'll give you $600,000.
You know what? I'm in a great mood, so $600,000 it is.
Deal.
Can you send him to me today? I want him to have a physical.
He's on his way.
Thank you.
Yes, yes.
-What's up, Chavita? -Potro! Bro, The Pumas want you.
Get ready, Hugo Sánchez will pick you up and take you to the CeNARD for a physical.
Are you retarded? How am I gonna pass a physical? I can barely walk, you idiot.
I don't give a shit, dude.
Rub on some ointment, get an injection of something.
Pass the physical, after you've been benched for two years, you get a raise.
Okay, okay Great.
It's the national team.
Moisés is done.
You get him onto the B team, I'll sell him.
Who wants to sponsor him? At the moment, Shampoo Corres, but you know more brands.
Can he still play? Nine goals in Greece.
Qualified for Champions.
That's something.
And money is not a problem now.
Awesome! It's a pleasure doing business with prudent people.
One more thing.
See what can you get for me, please.
-A commercial? -Yeah.
Like an athlete's foot medication.
I'll get you something.
We'll talk later.
Thanks, dude.
Thanks.
Trades have officially started for 2017, selling off the legs for this next season.
We'll let you know which player goes where.
Reporting from Acapulco.
Isn't he hurting her? They're professionals.
Cut! Cut! Dylan.
Hi.
-You look great.
-Don't lie.
I have something for you.
Take a break.
I'll be back in five.
Okay.
Hi! Hi.
Hi, how are you? What's your name? Hugo Sánchez.
Are you an actor? Well Well, I did Beauty and the Beast once.
I played Belle.
It was an all-male school.
But everyone told me that I did great on stage.
Take out your dick, I want to see it.
Cortisone, for inflammation.
And a little bit of adrenaline, it'll help you feel better.
Apply subcutaneously.
-Thank you.
-And thank you.
Are there any side effects that I should be aware of? Maybe a little tachycardia.
Dizziness, sometimes.
-And some bleeding.
-What do you mean, bleeding? It happens sometimes, but You'll be fine.
Let's go.
Easy.
Thank you.
See you.
Yesterday they called Moisés Suárez and Peralta for the national team.
Excuse me.
Did you say that the national team called Moisés Suárez? Yes.
They called him yesterday.
Dude.
Dude.
The national team called Moisés.
-What? -Where's Contreras? I already have a goalie, I need two center-forwards-- -Hi, Ernesto.
-Hi, Chava.
Listen.
I just found out that the national team wants Moisés.
-Yes.
We got the report yesterday.
-Well, we don't agree.
We didn't end things well.
He just left the FC, sending us to 2nd division, so, no way.
-Chava-- -Look, it's the gentlemen's agreement.
I don't want to.
Listen, Huguito.
I need your help.
-Yes? -Let's go to the washroom.
-The washroom--? -Go ahead, come on.
Okay.
Come on.
Come here, and help me.
-Do you really need me for that? -Come here, moron.
Help me.
Close the door, you moron.
It's really tight in here, but we'll manage.
Here.
Let's see.
Okay.
I'm not sure I can-- Come on, you moron motherfucker.
Put that inside of me! Okay.
Okay.
Shit.
I'm sorry.
Marco GarcÃa has a couple of foreign players that seem good enough.
How do we know he won't give us useless players? -It's fine.
-We haven't check them over, Chava.
Marco is my friend, dude.
I'll talk with him and make a quick deal.
Plus there's the statistics.
They haven't made a purchase.
There are a lot of players.
Where's Marco? Where's GarcÃa? Why don't we talk to him? -GarcÃa is over there.
-There he is.
-Yes, yes, yes.
Yes, let's go.
-Marco! Baby.
How are you, bro? What's wrong? What's wrong, Isabel? It's Rafa.
You can't pick up now, we have-- Just give me a minute.
Chivo.
Chabela I found out about Pizarro and I'm really sorry.
He called me to go over some details, and I didn't know what to tell him.
Yeah, don't worry, we'll take care of it.
Why did you do it, Chivo? Do you really want to talk about it now? Yes, I want to talk now.
Well I've been thinking about what drove me to do this.
And I think it's because I hadn't felt appreciated like that in a long time.
I feel that no matter what, I What did you say? What do you mean, appreciated? I think you classify people in two categories.
Those who help you rise up to 1st division, and those who lose everything to get you there.
I don't think a single person, let alone a husband, should be treated like that.
That's what I think.
I'm interested in Molina, Ruso, and Virelli, that's all.
Molina is out of business, but I can give you Chávez, he's a great player.
I'm not interested in leftovers, dude.
How much for Molina? Molina is not available.
Okay.
I'll take Virelli and Ruso.
-A package deal.
-I don't want all three.
-It's 2.
5 million for them.
-I don't want all three.
It's 2.
5 million for them.
Chava.
Chava.
Can we talk for a minute? -Excuse us.
-Sure.
-Chávez is a good player.
-Come on.
He's leftovers.
Everybody is getting the best of South America, and I take the leftovers? No.
He's a great defender.
He knows what he's doing.
Plus, we don't have any of those.
We need to fill up the list.
Come on.
I'll take all three.
Just sign this.
I guarantee you'll get their photo in Cuervos uniforms today.
Great.
Thank you.
-Take care.
-Thank you.
These are the famous certifications.
"Legal obligations" -You'll take care of this? -No.
I have no idea how that works.
You didn't learn how to do that? Yes.
I know how to do that.
Where's Isabel? -She's on the phone.
-What? Now? Don't mess with me.
She's the one who knows how to do this.
Fuck.
Isabel! We didn't have to wait long.
We already know about some important contracts.
We know that Fozaretti is going to Cruz Azul.
You have no idea how complicated it is.
Okay? Yes.
I didn't want to hurt you, but Toluca is starting to spend as well, getting Checho Tellez.
And the Pumas are finally getting William Anderson, who will support the team.
I think that since your dad died, -we've been growing apart -Yes, yes, yes.
"It will be in his favor, all that he's entitled to, due to his own image while practicing said activities--" I don't understand this shit, dude.
This is the coach's responsibility.
Dude! Are you-- Are you Camilo? -That's right.
-Remember me? -How are you? -Fine.
How's your daughter? -I have a son.
-My bad.
How's your wife? -She passed away.
-You don't say.
-Yes.
-I'm so sorry.
Do you have a second? I'm about to close a deal with Marco GarcÃa, and I honestly don't understand this contract.
Could you please take a look and see if everything is in order? Sure.
Gladly.
That's so kind of you.
Thank you.
Do you think it's okay? It looks fine.
Should I sign it? Give me a second.
-What's up? -I don't get it.
Me either.
Do you think he got offended about his wife? -Yes.
-After you aborted -the baby -Yes.
I got really depressed.
I don't know.
I felt as if you weren't supporting me.
I felt alone.
Fuck! Where's Isabel? This shit is her responsibility.
I don't know anything about this contract shit.
Why is Marco talking with that fucker? What is he signing, dude? What's he signing? Fuck me.
Hey! Hey! I didn't feel like you were there for me.
I felt alone.
I felt as if I wasn't there, as if you weren't listening.
Can you talk about the rumors about the team only a few hours from the deadline? -I felt as if I was wasting my time.
-Yes, thank you.
I should have done-- There was no direction.
I thought about things to-- I need your badge.
-I lost it, sorry.
--I was doing things wrong I can't allow you inside.
Do you know who I am? -No.
-I'm Isabel Iglesias.
How can I tell without your badge? Are you serious? Isabel.
Are you there, Isabel? Are you're talking with-- Hello? Hey! Hey! Marco! Dude! What happened? -You weren't fast enough, brother.
-Come on! That fucking Camilo! Fifteen minutes, Marco.
What do we do now? Who do you know? I know Betancourt.
I don't have anyone left.
The Loco López.
No.
I have everyone placed.
Goddamn it! Adrián Orozco! I don't have anyone.
The Cholos haven't been left behind.
The border team will be quite creative with its attack.
Stellar players.
-With this amazing talent -Welcome.
So, who do we have? Nobody.
What?! What do you mean, nobody? What happened with GarcÃa? We talked, came to an agreement.
He gave me the contract, I didn't understand it, so he started talking with that idiot Camilo What's his name? -Negrete.
-That dude! Why am I explaining you this, dude? Where the fuck were you? You made us loose the contract.
I had to take a phone call! I hope it was important, because guess what? We have no team! -But how? I left you for five minutes! -It's your responsibility! This place is full of people! -That's enough, guys! Enough.
Stop it! -I wasn't gone that long! We have to sign six players in less than -I wanna cut off my balls! -Yeah, yeah, I know.
Calm down.
Yes, Fede, calm down.
You're not helping.
-Unless -I don't know.
What? No! You have to be kidding.
These are street soccer players! So what? The others signed all the foreign players.
And they left us all the nationals.
We'll get a great and inexpensive team.
Right? And if we don't sign them these people They'll end up in the street.
Right.
It's like when U2's concert had already started, and resellers ended up with their tickets in hand.
Let's go.
Let's go.
Are we ready? Yes.
Let's do this.
Fuck it! Let's get the national soccer leftovers.
Let's be positive.
Let's go, Cuervos, let's go.
It appears that the draft is over.
Most players are foreigners, that's normal.
-And the money crisis-- -This way! It appears it's not over yet.
The Iglesias siblings are making a scene down there in the lobby.
I can't tell you if they're counting, arguing, or making deals.
They're the faces of the Cuervos' franchise.
I'm afraid that, from what I'm seeing, this isn't over.
I'll let you know who they get-- No one is left.
-Carlos.
How are you? -Okay.
These idiots will lose their position.
They won't finish the season.
Who's that guy? He's Roberto Carmenara's son.
-Why is he team-less? -He's a jerk.
No one can stand him.
Is he a good player? -Pretty good.
-Really? Well, okay.
We want him.
Does he have a sister? Why is Guerrero unattached? He has a heart murmur, but it's under control.
Can he die while playing? If you insure him, he's the insurance's problem, not yours.
Benito "the Zombie" Guerrero! And the Cuervos are taking quite the risk.
Here's Javi Ezeta, what do you think? -I heard that Javi Ezeta-- -Mr.
Iglesias.
-Hi.
How are you? -How are you? Hi.
Mrs.
Iglesias Reina.
Iglesias.
How are you, Julio? -Doing fine.
-What are you doing here? Didn't Cruz Azul get you? Yes.
But they signed a lot of players for this season.
And now they're trying to loan out their spares.
Since they couldn't take us all to Argentina, I'm one of the spares.
He's the fucker who took my three players.
Wanna talk to him? There's Camilo.
Camilo! How are you, Isabel? I swear it wasn't personal.
How much to borrow Julito? You cover his payment, and promise me that he'll play.
Okay.
Deal.
-Deal.
-Okay.
Julito! Come here, please.
-Excuse me.
-No problem.
-Excuse me, Mr.
Iglesias.
-Yes? I'm Cuauhtémoc Cruz's agent.
Really? Wasn't Eliseo Canales his agent? Not anymore.
But your coach sent me a text that I couldn't receive.
I'm surprised that you even have a signal.
-Hi.
-Hi.
Is there anything I need to know? Are you resigning him? Give us a moment, please? I think this dude has no idea that we were firing Cuau.
Look, we need a strong midfielder.
We need Cuau.
Will we be able to stand him the whole season? Are you sure? We don't have players, Chava.
Tell Cuau that we'll see him next week.
Excellent.
And Excuse me.
Just out of curiosity, do you need a goalie? Let's see.
Yeah, yeah, sure.
Pepenador Morales? Let me see.
He played in Chivas a whole season as a backup goalie.
And another two years with Tigres.
-Why did they let him go? -Because they got a new goalie.
He has good numbers, and he's young.
Just out of curiosity, why do they call him "Pepenador"? Because picking up waste is his other job.
-It's a pleasure dealing with you.
-Thanks.
We'll see him Monday.
-Let's see.
Let's see.
-Pepenador Morales, dude.
Is the waste company sponsoring us? We haven't seen these players for six months, a year.
A lot of them are unknown.
If the Cuervos want to continue in this division It'll be complicated.
What do you think, doc? He can still run.
He tripped, but nothing out of the ordinary.
I think that he's fine.
Okay.
Fuck, yeah! We're in! We're in! -He's cleared to play? -Yes.
Welcome, Potro.
Thank you.
-What's up? -Sir.
Great news! Potro passed.
-Seriously? That's cool.
-Yeah! I also wanted to tell you that I found Isabel Cantú on Instagram.
Did you know that she has over 30,000 followers? Yeah, right! Do you think she bought them? Great.
-Good job, Hugo Sánchez.
-Thank you, sir.
It's a real honor to always-- We sold Potro.
We're up $600,000.
-Yes? -Hi.
This is Dr.
Treviño.
I checked Potro Romani today.
Okay.
What can I help you with? This won't take long.
I want 50 percent of what you get.
Are you crazy? Potro is great.
You said it yourself.
Come on.
It's obvious he's unhealthy.
-I'll send my bank information.
-Don't try to fuck with me.
Don't you-- My bad, Potro's sale was actually $300,000.
What can we do? What's wrong? I know you're going through a rough time, but Dude! What the fuck happened today? What happened today, Chava Is that you were unable to read a simple contract.
No.
Don't fuck with me.
That wasn't my job.
It wasn't my responsibility.
It was the coach's job.
And you decided to fire him the day before, dude.
You fucked it up! You made me lose a great team, and all of their fans.
Fine.
Fine.
I apologize, Chava.
I'm sorry! Okay? I thought you'd support me.
Am I not supporting you? What do you want? I'm here! What the fuck do you want? No! What do you want me to say, Chava? That I care more about my family than the team? Yes! Worst timing.
-Yes.
-It's done! What are we gonna do now? The Tarantulas have our stadium, and our amazing lineup, too.
I could nominate myself, but what team would I be presenting? You know what, Chava? You know what? It's-- Enough! I'm an idiot! I ruined us.
I fucked us.
And you should be the sole president.
Are you happy? That's what you wanted to hear, right? So, stop it.
That's it.
Isabel.
Isabel! Fuck! Isabel! -Isabel! -What? Come here.
What? What are you doing, Chava? I'm hugging you.
It wasn't your fault.
Everything will be fine.
Everything will be fine.
He cheated on me, Chava.
-I know.
-He cheated on me.
I know.
-Thank you.
Take care.
-It was my pleasure.
Take him to South America.
There's the money.
-Excuse me.
-Sure.
See you later.
Isabel Iglesias.
-Chava.
-Hey.
Eliseo Canales.
Excuse us.
So I heard you didn't do well in the draft.
Let's just say we managed.
I heard you want Moisés on the national team.
-That's correct.
-That's a shame.
We can't always get what we want.
Well, that's unless someone else has what you need.
Right.
Look.
You messed with my presidency and stole my team.
I don't give a fuck about you.
I'll give you nothing.
For once in your fucking life, I want to see you suffer.
-Excuse us.
-Take care, enjoy Mexico.
What an asshole.
-I know, Chava.
-What? -Come.
-What? No, no, no.
Eliseo! You may have something that we need.
Let's hear it.
You want us to let Moisés play for the national team.
-Yes.
-Okay.
We want something.
What the fuck, Eliseo? Why are you calling me this late? I have great news.
You're back on the national team.
Fucking A, Eliseo! You're amazing.
I also have some bad news.
To return to the national team, you have to play for the Cuervos.
What? Moi? Moisés? Subtitle translation by Greg S.
GREECE Yo, DJ.
Play some Sean Puffy.
No, man, no.
No, Puffy, no.
Juan Gabriel.
Who is Juan Gabriel? -Aristóteles.
-Yes? -Can you push me over there? -Yeah, no problem -What's up, dude? What's new? -They don't want you.
Eliseo, don't fuck with me.
I'm the only Mexican player overseas who isn't on the national team, asshole.
I scored 18 goals in this league.
I was the first to do that.
What bothers me now, dude is what's with the bonuses? Wasn't I supposed to get a bonus if I lead the league in scoring, whatever? Absolutely nothing.
I've been waiting three months for that payment.
Take care of that.
What's with the national team? Everyone used to be nice to me, dude now they won't take my calls.
Hey.
Did you read the article? "The eight players who are killing it in Europe.
" Of course I read the article, Moi.
Whose idea do you think that was? Was it you? Well, anyway what the article says is the truth.
Yes.
And it's also true that you're 33, and running in shorts you look almost as ridiculous as Chabelo.
Well, I may be ridiculous, but the shampoo company Sócrates wants me to promote them here in Europe.
And they want me here for three years.
Well, we'll see.
Moi, your career has been amazing, you've played in two world cups.
Retire with dignity.
Comfortably.
That's what I'm talking about, dude.
I want to retire wealthy.
With the national team.
Now, the question is, do you want royalties? Well, yeah, yeah.
I'll see what I can do.
Okay? See you.
Yes.
See you.
A NETFLIX ORIGINAL SERIES He didn't give a shit about who I am.
He won't respect authority, dude.
She took us out of the VIP race with the players.
Even Pizarro was there.
Fucking arrogant bitch, dude.
She's a jerk, presumptuous, way too thin, quite attractive, fucking-- A pain in the ass, amazing, she's perfect.
You don't-- The amount of power that these brats get is unbelievable.
They're out of control.
Is she hot or what? She's hot, dude.
She doesn't have a Facebook page, I searched all day.
Facebook has these tough privacy settings, and I need information.
I gotta know if she has a dude that I need to neutralize to get her.
Although, if she was taken, she wouldn't have gone that day.
She was alone there.
Isabel! -Hey! What's up? -What's up? You didn't comb your hair today? -Where's Rafa? -He's not coming.
What? Why isn't he coming? He's been officially uninvited.
Yeah, right.
And who's going to finalize the contracts? Not him.
-I don't understand.
-Can you elaborate a little? We need a coach.
Where the fuck is Rafael? Chava.
I fired him.
-What? -Why? It's not your decision to make.
You can't decide something like that.
This is a team, dude.
-Why the fuck did you fire him? -I caught him with someone! Fuck me.
Well, my dears, I have to go.
This is something you have to deal with yourselves No, wait.
Sit.
Everything is fine.
I'm fine.
I am.
I'm fine.
What the fuck will we do now? What do you think, Chava? We'll fix this, between us.
Really? You know he was taking care of transfers? Couldn't you fire him after the draft? -No.
-Well, we're fucked, dude.
Great.
I need a drink.
Oh, Isabel Why did Rafa cheat on me? I know it isn't easy working with your wife, but it wasn't easy for me either.
Do you think it was easy? I supported him, I pushed him to be more than just a player.
Maybe men have to fuck, right? I mean, they need to fuck.
They just need to fuck everything that moves.
The human race trying to survive.
I was also an idiot, right? Marrying a soccer player.
I didn't think about it.
He ended up cheating on me.
I was so stupid.
Did you know? -About--? -It's obvious, since you won't say.
-Because of the bro code? -No.
Fucking idiots.
Okay.
I I really need to go to the washroom, if that's okay with you.
-Okay? -If you gotta go, then go.
Okay.
See you soon.
-Fede! -Yes, ma'am? Thank you for listening.
Do not apologize, you know I don't fly economy, dude.
Right, Hugo Sánchez, no first class, I won't fly.
Or get the chopper ready.
Don't argue.
Just fix it.
Bye.
Hey, Fede, you know what? It's not okay that I'm seated behind my employee.
Can I get your seat? Cuervos' policy.
Chava, Chava.
Chava.
All the seats are the same.
-Don't worry, Isabel.
Really, it's okay.
-See? -It's okay.
-We have to follow these absurd policies.
Are you okay? Please let me help you.
Go ahead.
You know what, dude? I'm such an idiot.
This is my seat.
This is my seat.
Nice.
-How are you? -Fine.
-Nice to meet you, Chava Iglesias.
-Hi.
-Are you going to Acapulco? -Yes.
-What's your name? -Valeria.
Nice to meet you.
Excuse me, is that your seat? Oh, I'm sorry.
No problem.
Pardon me, sir.
Did I step on you? Good morning.
Good morning, how are you? I heard you were talking about a great team.
Yes.
I was.
We're actually announcing something great today.
Really? -Funny, so are we.
-Well-- -I don't think it'll be as great as ours.
-Really? We're announcing a new contract with an international star.
Super-hot right now.
-Do you want a clue? -Please.
It starts with "Pi" and ends with "zarro.
" -Javier Pizarro? -That's the one! -He signed with us.
-Yeah, right! That's odd, we closed the deal last night.
We closed this morning.
He wants to live near his mom.
Don't fuck with me.
I'm not fucking with you.
-Isabel! -What? What, Chava? What? This fucker is telling me that Pizarro is with the Tarantulas.
Don't worry, Chava.
Let's call Pizarro's people to clear this up.
-Do you want his number? It's in my phone.
-We've been talking with him for weeks.
Dealing with him.
Fede, can you please give me Pizarro's number? I don't have it, Isabel.
I didn't talk to him.
-It's 55 -It's 55, 30, 26, 94, seven, four.
Seven, four.
Thank you.
Hi, Mr.
DÃaz, this is Isabel Iglesias.
Can you put the speaker on? Hi, how are you, this is Chava Iglesias.
We just heard this rumor-- You know how shitty the Tarantulas are with their deals.
They say that Pizarro is supposed to be with them.
So, we want to be clear.
Pizarro is with the Cuervos, right? Pizarro didn't have a problem being a Cuervo -Mm-hm.
-as long as Rafa was there.
But now that he isn't, things have changed.
-Yeah, but we have a contract with you.
-No.
-Miss-- -Wait a second, please.
-What? -This is important.
-One second! -Javier Pizarro admired Rafael, that's why he wanted to be a Cuervo, but since he's no longer there-- -Fuck! -What the--? Isabel! I don't care how, but Rafael has to be back today.
-Well-- -I need Rafael back.
Chava.
That's enough.
It's not possible.
You know what? They can keep Pizarro.
We're signing our players today, and they're amazingly good.
We don't need-- -Yes? -Hi.
Chava Iglesias? Yes, this is Chava Iglesias.
I'm calling on behalf of Francisco DÃaz, just found out that Pizarro didn't sign.
Yes.
What about it? Francisco DÃaz won't sign without Javier Pizarro.
-But DÃaz is with us.
-Yes, but you lost Javier Pizarro.
I know, but we have a deal-- DÃaz won't sign without Pizarro.
Don't take it the wrong way.
Why'd he give us his word then? What kind of deal is this? Hello.
Yes.
I wanted to know if-- Oh, yes, Mr.
M-- -What? -I'm getting another call.
Fuck it! Fernando just rejected us.
-Hello.
-Yes? They're independent.
Why--? What do you mean, he won't play? Nobody will sign without Pizarro.
Excuse me-- Can we get a second? Why don't you go to the back, and let us finish this? Instead of five months to prepare the team, now we only have ten hours-- Was it that hard to fuck him just one more night? -Fuckin' shit! -Fuckin' shit! We have to find every international player who hasn't signed, and get them to sign with us.
I don't give a shit if they're from Bolivia, Ecuador, or whatever.
We find them, get them, and that's it.
Chava, by now they must all have at least handshake deals.
We need the national talent.
The Mexicans.
No, Fede! No! The Tarantulas just destroyed our lineup.
If we don't do something big, something relevant, our fans will follow them, and we won't get the stadium back.
-Okay? -Okay.
Fine.
Fine.
-I'll help you.
-Yes, well-- -Yes? Chava Iglesias.
-Chava! Carlos Diego, from the Pumas.
How are you? Charlie, what can I help with? Rafa told me he's no longer with you, and rumor has it that you're interested in selling Potro.
Yes! Indeed we are-- Can you hold on a moment please? -The Pumas want Potro.
-What? Sorry.
Yes, he's available.
And we're really happy about it, since he's recovering faster than doctors anticipated.
So, to get him it would cost -One million.
-Don't fuck with me, I'm not an idiot.
I'll give you $600,000.
You know what? I'm in a great mood, so $600,000 it is.
Deal.
Can you send him to me today? I want him to have a physical.
He's on his way.
Thank you.
Yes, yes.
-What's up, Chavita? -Potro! Bro, The Pumas want you.
Get ready, Hugo Sánchez will pick you up and take you to the CeNARD for a physical.
Are you retarded? How am I gonna pass a physical? I can barely walk, you idiot.
I don't give a shit, dude.
Rub on some ointment, get an injection of something.
Pass the physical, after you've been benched for two years, you get a raise.
Okay, okay Great.
It's the national team.
Moisés is done.
You get him onto the B team, I'll sell him.
Who wants to sponsor him? At the moment, Shampoo Corres, but you know more brands.
Can he still play? Nine goals in Greece.
Qualified for Champions.
That's something.
And money is not a problem now.
Awesome! It's a pleasure doing business with prudent people.
One more thing.
See what can you get for me, please.
-A commercial? -Yeah.
Like an athlete's foot medication.
I'll get you something.
We'll talk later.
Thanks, dude.
Thanks.
Trades have officially started for 2017, selling off the legs for this next season.
We'll let you know which player goes where.
Reporting from Acapulco.
Isn't he hurting her? They're professionals.
Cut! Cut! Dylan.
Hi.
-You look great.
-Don't lie.
I have something for you.
Take a break.
I'll be back in five.
Okay.
Hi! Hi.
Hi, how are you? What's your name? Hugo Sánchez.
Are you an actor? Well Well, I did Beauty and the Beast once.
I played Belle.
It was an all-male school.
But everyone told me that I did great on stage.
Take out your dick, I want to see it.
Cortisone, for inflammation.
And a little bit of adrenaline, it'll help you feel better.
Apply subcutaneously.
-Thank you.
-And thank you.
Are there any side effects that I should be aware of? Maybe a little tachycardia.
Dizziness, sometimes.
-And some bleeding.
-What do you mean, bleeding? It happens sometimes, but You'll be fine.
Let's go.
Easy.
Thank you.
See you.
Yesterday they called Moisés Suárez and Peralta for the national team.
Excuse me.
Did you say that the national team called Moisés Suárez? Yes.
They called him yesterday.
Dude.
Dude.
The national team called Moisés.
-What? -Where's Contreras? I already have a goalie, I need two center-forwards-- -Hi, Ernesto.
-Hi, Chava.
Listen.
I just found out that the national team wants Moisés.
-Yes.
We got the report yesterday.
-Well, we don't agree.
We didn't end things well.
He just left the FC, sending us to 2nd division, so, no way.
-Chava-- -Look, it's the gentlemen's agreement.
I don't want to.
Listen, Huguito.
I need your help.
-Yes? -Let's go to the washroom.
-The washroom--? -Go ahead, come on.
Okay.
Come on.
Come here, and help me.
-Do you really need me for that? -Come here, moron.
Help me.
Close the door, you moron.
It's really tight in here, but we'll manage.
Here.
Let's see.
Okay.
I'm not sure I can-- Come on, you moron motherfucker.
Put that inside of me! Okay.
Okay.
Shit.
I'm sorry.
Marco GarcÃa has a couple of foreign players that seem good enough.
How do we know he won't give us useless players? -It's fine.
-We haven't check them over, Chava.
Marco is my friend, dude.
I'll talk with him and make a quick deal.
Plus there's the statistics.
They haven't made a purchase.
There are a lot of players.
Where's Marco? Where's GarcÃa? Why don't we talk to him? -GarcÃa is over there.
-There he is.
-Yes, yes, yes.
Yes, let's go.
-Marco! Baby.
How are you, bro? What's wrong? What's wrong, Isabel? It's Rafa.
You can't pick up now, we have-- Just give me a minute.
Chivo.
Chabela I found out about Pizarro and I'm really sorry.
He called me to go over some details, and I didn't know what to tell him.
Yeah, don't worry, we'll take care of it.
Why did you do it, Chivo? Do you really want to talk about it now? Yes, I want to talk now.
Well I've been thinking about what drove me to do this.
And I think it's because I hadn't felt appreciated like that in a long time.
I feel that no matter what, I What did you say? What do you mean, appreciated? I think you classify people in two categories.
Those who help you rise up to 1st division, and those who lose everything to get you there.
I don't think a single person, let alone a husband, should be treated like that.
That's what I think.
I'm interested in Molina, Ruso, and Virelli, that's all.
Molina is out of business, but I can give you Chávez, he's a great player.
I'm not interested in leftovers, dude.
How much for Molina? Molina is not available.
Okay.
I'll take Virelli and Ruso.
-A package deal.
-I don't want all three.
-It's 2.
5 million for them.
-I don't want all three.
It's 2.
5 million for them.
Chava.
Chava.
Can we talk for a minute? -Excuse us.
-Sure.
-Chávez is a good player.
-Come on.
He's leftovers.
Everybody is getting the best of South America, and I take the leftovers? No.
He's a great defender.
He knows what he's doing.
Plus, we don't have any of those.
We need to fill up the list.
Come on.
I'll take all three.
Just sign this.
I guarantee you'll get their photo in Cuervos uniforms today.
Great.
Thank you.
-Take care.
-Thank you.
These are the famous certifications.
"Legal obligations" -You'll take care of this? -No.
I have no idea how that works.
You didn't learn how to do that? Yes.
I know how to do that.
Where's Isabel? -She's on the phone.
-What? Now? Don't mess with me.
She's the one who knows how to do this.
Fuck.
Isabel! We didn't have to wait long.
We already know about some important contracts.
We know that Fozaretti is going to Cruz Azul.
You have no idea how complicated it is.
Okay? Yes.
I didn't want to hurt you, but Toluca is starting to spend as well, getting Checho Tellez.
And the Pumas are finally getting William Anderson, who will support the team.
I think that since your dad died, -we've been growing apart -Yes, yes, yes.
"It will be in his favor, all that he's entitled to, due to his own image while practicing said activities--" I don't understand this shit, dude.
This is the coach's responsibility.
Dude! Are you-- Are you Camilo? -That's right.
-Remember me? -How are you? -Fine.
How's your daughter? -I have a son.
-My bad.
How's your wife? -She passed away.
-You don't say.
-Yes.
-I'm so sorry.
Do you have a second? I'm about to close a deal with Marco GarcÃa, and I honestly don't understand this contract.
Could you please take a look and see if everything is in order? Sure.
Gladly.
That's so kind of you.
Thank you.
Do you think it's okay? It looks fine.
Should I sign it? Give me a second.
-What's up? -I don't get it.
Me either.
Do you think he got offended about his wife? -Yes.
-After you aborted -the baby -Yes.
I got really depressed.
I don't know.
I felt as if you weren't supporting me.
I felt alone.
Fuck! Where's Isabel? This shit is her responsibility.
I don't know anything about this contract shit.
Why is Marco talking with that fucker? What is he signing, dude? What's he signing? Fuck me.
Hey! Hey! I didn't feel like you were there for me.
I felt alone.
I felt as if I wasn't there, as if you weren't listening.
Can you talk about the rumors about the team only a few hours from the deadline? -I felt as if I was wasting my time.
-Yes, thank you.
I should have done-- There was no direction.
I thought about things to-- I need your badge.
-I lost it, sorry.
--I was doing things wrong I can't allow you inside.
Do you know who I am? -No.
-I'm Isabel Iglesias.
How can I tell without your badge? Are you serious? Isabel.
Are you there, Isabel? Are you're talking with-- Hello? Hey! Hey! Marco! Dude! What happened? -You weren't fast enough, brother.
-Come on! That fucking Camilo! Fifteen minutes, Marco.
What do we do now? Who do you know? I know Betancourt.
I don't have anyone left.
The Loco López.
No.
I have everyone placed.
Goddamn it! Adrián Orozco! I don't have anyone.
The Cholos haven't been left behind.
The border team will be quite creative with its attack.
Stellar players.
-With this amazing talent -Welcome.
So, who do we have? Nobody.
What?! What do you mean, nobody? What happened with GarcÃa? We talked, came to an agreement.
He gave me the contract, I didn't understand it, so he started talking with that idiot Camilo What's his name? -Negrete.
-That dude! Why am I explaining you this, dude? Where the fuck were you? You made us loose the contract.
I had to take a phone call! I hope it was important, because guess what? We have no team! -But how? I left you for five minutes! -It's your responsibility! This place is full of people! -That's enough, guys! Enough.
Stop it! -I wasn't gone that long! We have to sign six players in less than -I wanna cut off my balls! -Yeah, yeah, I know.
Calm down.
Yes, Fede, calm down.
You're not helping.
-Unless -I don't know.
What? No! You have to be kidding.
These are street soccer players! So what? The others signed all the foreign players.
And they left us all the nationals.
We'll get a great and inexpensive team.
Right? And if we don't sign them these people They'll end up in the street.
Right.
It's like when U2's concert had already started, and resellers ended up with their tickets in hand.
Let's go.
Let's go.
Are we ready? Yes.
Let's do this.
Fuck it! Let's get the national soccer leftovers.
Let's be positive.
Let's go, Cuervos, let's go.
It appears that the draft is over.
Most players are foreigners, that's normal.
-And the money crisis-- -This way! It appears it's not over yet.
The Iglesias siblings are making a scene down there in the lobby.
I can't tell you if they're counting, arguing, or making deals.
They're the faces of the Cuervos' franchise.
I'm afraid that, from what I'm seeing, this isn't over.
I'll let you know who they get-- No one is left.
-Carlos.
How are you? -Okay.
These idiots will lose their position.
They won't finish the season.
Who's that guy? He's Roberto Carmenara's son.
-Why is he team-less? -He's a jerk.
No one can stand him.
Is he a good player? -Pretty good.
-Really? Well, okay.
We want him.
Does he have a sister? Why is Guerrero unattached? He has a heart murmur, but it's under control.
Can he die while playing? If you insure him, he's the insurance's problem, not yours.
Benito "the Zombie" Guerrero! And the Cuervos are taking quite the risk.
Here's Javi Ezeta, what do you think? -I heard that Javi Ezeta-- -Mr.
Iglesias.
-Hi.
How are you? -How are you? Hi.
Mrs.
Iglesias Reina.
Iglesias.
How are you, Julio? -Doing fine.
-What are you doing here? Didn't Cruz Azul get you? Yes.
But they signed a lot of players for this season.
And now they're trying to loan out their spares.
Since they couldn't take us all to Argentina, I'm one of the spares.
He's the fucker who took my three players.
Wanna talk to him? There's Camilo.
Camilo! How are you, Isabel? I swear it wasn't personal.
How much to borrow Julito? You cover his payment, and promise me that he'll play.
Okay.
Deal.
-Deal.
-Okay.
Julito! Come here, please.
-Excuse me.
-No problem.
-Excuse me, Mr.
Iglesias.
-Yes? I'm Cuauhtémoc Cruz's agent.
Really? Wasn't Eliseo Canales his agent? Not anymore.
But your coach sent me a text that I couldn't receive.
I'm surprised that you even have a signal.
-Hi.
-Hi.
Is there anything I need to know? Are you resigning him? Give us a moment, please? I think this dude has no idea that we were firing Cuau.
Look, we need a strong midfielder.
We need Cuau.
Will we be able to stand him the whole season? Are you sure? We don't have players, Chava.
Tell Cuau that we'll see him next week.
Excellent.
And Excuse me.
Just out of curiosity, do you need a goalie? Let's see.
Yeah, yeah, sure.
Pepenador Morales? Let me see.
He played in Chivas a whole season as a backup goalie.
And another two years with Tigres.
-Why did they let him go? -Because they got a new goalie.
He has good numbers, and he's young.
Just out of curiosity, why do they call him "Pepenador"? Because picking up waste is his other job.
-It's a pleasure dealing with you.
-Thanks.
We'll see him Monday.
-Let's see.
Let's see.
-Pepenador Morales, dude.
Is the waste company sponsoring us? We haven't seen these players for six months, a year.
A lot of them are unknown.
If the Cuervos want to continue in this division It'll be complicated.
What do you think, doc? He can still run.
He tripped, but nothing out of the ordinary.
I think that he's fine.
Okay.
Fuck, yeah! We're in! We're in! -He's cleared to play? -Yes.
Welcome, Potro.
Thank you.
-What's up? -Sir.
Great news! Potro passed.
-Seriously? That's cool.
-Yeah! I also wanted to tell you that I found Isabel Cantú on Instagram.
Did you know that she has over 30,000 followers? Yeah, right! Do you think she bought them? Great.
-Good job, Hugo Sánchez.
-Thank you, sir.
It's a real honor to always-- We sold Potro.
We're up $600,000.
-Yes? -Hi.
This is Dr.
Treviño.
I checked Potro Romani today.
Okay.
What can I help you with? This won't take long.
I want 50 percent of what you get.
Are you crazy? Potro is great.
You said it yourself.
Come on.
It's obvious he's unhealthy.
-I'll send my bank information.
-Don't try to fuck with me.
Don't you-- My bad, Potro's sale was actually $300,000.
What can we do? What's wrong? I know you're going through a rough time, but Dude! What the fuck happened today? What happened today, Chava Is that you were unable to read a simple contract.
No.
Don't fuck with me.
That wasn't my job.
It wasn't my responsibility.
It was the coach's job.
And you decided to fire him the day before, dude.
You fucked it up! You made me lose a great team, and all of their fans.
Fine.
Fine.
I apologize, Chava.
I'm sorry! Okay? I thought you'd support me.
Am I not supporting you? What do you want? I'm here! What the fuck do you want? No! What do you want me to say, Chava? That I care more about my family than the team? Yes! Worst timing.
-Yes.
-It's done! What are we gonna do now? The Tarantulas have our stadium, and our amazing lineup, too.
I could nominate myself, but what team would I be presenting? You know what, Chava? You know what? It's-- Enough! I'm an idiot! I ruined us.
I fucked us.
And you should be the sole president.
Are you happy? That's what you wanted to hear, right? So, stop it.
That's it.
Isabel.
Isabel! Fuck! Isabel! -Isabel! -What? Come here.
What? What are you doing, Chava? I'm hugging you.
It wasn't your fault.
Everything will be fine.
Everything will be fine.
He cheated on me, Chava.
-I know.
-He cheated on me.
I know.
-Thank you.
Take care.
-It was my pleasure.
Take him to South America.
There's the money.
-Excuse me.
-Sure.
See you later.
Isabel Iglesias.
-Chava.
-Hey.
Eliseo Canales.
Excuse us.
So I heard you didn't do well in the draft.
Let's just say we managed.
I heard you want Moisés on the national team.
-That's correct.
-That's a shame.
We can't always get what we want.
Well, that's unless someone else has what you need.
Right.
Look.
You messed with my presidency and stole my team.
I don't give a fuck about you.
I'll give you nothing.
For once in your fucking life, I want to see you suffer.
-Excuse us.
-Take care, enjoy Mexico.
What an asshole.
-I know, Chava.
-What? -Come.
-What? No, no, no.
Eliseo! You may have something that we need.
Let's hear it.
You want us to let Moisés play for the national team.
-Yes.
-Okay.
We want something.
What the fuck, Eliseo? Why are you calling me this late? I have great news.
You're back on the national team.
Fucking A, Eliseo! You're amazing.
I also have some bad news.
To return to the national team, you have to play for the Cuervos.
What? Moi? Moisés? Subtitle translation by Greg S.