Cooking with Paris (2021) s01e01 Episode Script

[gentle music playing]
[rhythmic pop music playing]
[music stops]
[lively whimsical music plays]
[Paris] Excuse me, sir?
[man] Yes?
[Paris] What do chives look like?
[man] That's chives.
- [Paris] This is chives?
- [man] Yes.
[Paris] What do I do with it?
[whimsical music continues]
Eggs.
Brioche.
There you are.
Bacon.
[whimsical music continues]
Cute.
[music fades]
Bye.
My dress got so fucked up.
[upbeat whimsical music plays]
[Paris] I love cooking,
but I'm not a trained chef.
And I'm not trying to be.
I have a few go-to dishes.
Sliving nachos, jello shots, lasagna.
But I wanna mix it up,
so I'm expanding my repertoire.
I've found some brand-new recipes,
and I'm inviting my friends over
to test them out.
- This looks so bomb.
- [Paris] Insane.
When I'm hosting, I do it right.
Hell yes.
And my wardrobe? On point.
So cute.
Will we create culinary magic?
- [woman] Moment of truth.
- [Paris] Wish me luck.
- [woman] Yes!
- Oh my God.
Anything's possible.
[breezy pop music plays]
Today I'm tackling breakfast.
Cereal is my favorite food group.
And my number one?
Lucky Charms.
For me, it's a midnight snack.
Mornings are overrated.
But I want to become a mom soon,
so learning to love mornings and breakfast
is high on the to-do list.
My menu and decor are inspired
by the best part of Lucky Charms,
the marshmallows.
The dining room will be filled
with marshmallow-y white balloons.
I'll be wearing white sliving gloves.
We'll have Frosted Flakes French toast
garnished with marshmallows,
and a frittata as fluffy as a cloud.
I've never made
any of these dishes before,
but my sous-chef is Kim Kardashian.
She has to get breakfast ready
for four kids every morning,
so she's gotta have things figured out.
Kim and I have elevated everything,
from velour tracksuits to selfies,
and we're about to do the same
for breakfast.
[music fades]
Yes, this is so amazing.
I know you love balloons.
I love this. This is so awesome.
I am so scared.
- Why are you scared?
- It's gonna explode.
- [Paris] You're scared of balloons?
- [Charlotte] Yes.
- [woman] Hi!
- [Paris] Hi!
- Welcome to heaven. [laughs]
- Thank you.
Oh, cute.
Yes, literally balloon heaven.
This is perfect for the marshmallows.
I love it.
Yes. Absolutely.
Your living room is a mess.
Thousands of balloons everywhere,
but we'll get it handled. [chuckles]
I love it.
- Well, keep killing it.
- [Maya] All right!
- Thank you, girls.
- [Charlotte] Thank you!
- [Paris] I'm scared I'm gonna pop them.
- [Charlotte] I know.
[breezy jazz music plays]
[Paris] Marshmallow time.
You can be my cooking assistant.
Sit there and look cute.
Prepping blue marshmallows.
[music fades]
- [upbeat jazz music plays]
- Smells so good.
Right.
Do this for 30 seconds. Close.
[microwave beeping]
[music fades]
I've loved marshmallows my whole life.
It's one of my favorite foods.
[microwave chimes]
Okay. Think it's done.
Yes.
Oh, this is perfect.
My favorite Lucky Charms
are the turquoise blue ones,
so I'm trying to make my very own ones
that are kind of like
that pretty baby blue color.
I don't know how many drops
I'm supposed to do,
but whatever, I'll try it.
I have to hurry,
because this will become all hard soon.
Okay, this is perfect color.
[whimsical jazz plays]
And I'm gonna just put it all together,
so it's a thin, even layer.
Oh my God. It's so heavy.
Fuck.
So good.
Okay. That's it.
Ugh.
It's, like, impossible to get off.
Oh, my sliv gloves.
Fuck.
Almost forgot the most important part.
Glitter.
[whimsical jazz continues]
So pretty.
Perfect!
That's what I call
sliving blue marshmallows.
This.
There.
- Now everything is ready for tomorrow.
- [breezy jazz plays]
Where's the milk?
Dope.
[music fades]
[upbeat jazz music plays]
Kim will be here in ten minutes.
Time for some sliv juice.
- [bottle pops open]
- Whoa!
[sighs]
[exhales] I'm so tired.
I'm not a morning person.
Cute.
[music fades]
[doorbell rings]
[sweeping romantic music plays]
- [Kim] Hi!
- Hi, gorgeous.
- This is what you cook in?
- Yes.
- Looking amazing. [laughs]
- Thank you.
- How are you?
- Good. I love your hair.
- Thank you.
- Beautiful.
- Welcome.
- Love the gloves!
- Thank you.
- Wait, you redid it!
- [Paris] Yes.
- [Kim] You did the floors.
- [Paris] Everything.
- Yeah.
- Literally every room.
- So good.
[Paris] I've known Kim Kardashian
since we were little girls,
and she's always been a morning person.
If anyone can help me wake up early
and cook a fabulous breakfast,
it's Kim.
Welcome to my kitchen.
So cool. Oh my God!
How cute!
- [Paris] Thank you.
- [Kim] What are we gonna make today?
French toast and, um,
like an omelet kind of frittata thing.
- Okay.
- Have you cooked that before?
I can.
- [romantic music plays]
- [Paris] Cooking with Kim Kardashian West.
I'm not usually a brunch person.
I'm more of a dinner person,
or eating cereal, like, at midnight.
- Yep.
- But since you're an early bird
- I am.
- I'm having brunch with you.
- [upbeat jazz plays]
- Look how cute my cooking book is.
- I made it. Yes.
- [Kim] That is so you.
- [Paris] Mm-hmm.
- Let me just say,
the days of traveling with Paris Hilton,
we would go to Rite Aid
and get so many stickers.
We would just collage on the plane rides.
And we would, like, bedazzle everything.
So this is so you.
I'm obsessed with Lucky Charms.
So I wanted to make
my own cute marshmallows
- to top our French toast.
- [Kim] Okay.
I started last night.
I made blue marshmallows.
And that's edible glitter.
It's not, like, poisonous.
Okay.
[Paris] How to shape
sliving blue marshmallows.
The key is cute cookie-cutters.
So we have all these shapes.
- [Kim] Cute.
- We choose what we like.
I'll do the unicorn.
Maybe a star.
- What else do we have? Star.
- Oh my God. That's so cute.
Loves it.
- Diamonds.
- I wanna bring it home to North.
[Paris] Tinker Bell.
- Did you have that made?
- How is North? She's so cute.
She's good.
She would love this.
They all would. They love to cook.
That's the fun part of having kids,
you can cook with them and do fun things.
We do pizza nights where I get dough
and I just get tons of toppings,
and I let them roll it out
and make pizzas.
- They love it.
- I've never done that before, make pizza.
It's so good. I'll give you, like,
the recipe just for a really easy thing,
like the dough.
And then you just pick your toppings.
- It's so easy and so good.
- Yes!
- You'll look like the best chef.
- Okay.
[Kim] Okay. You wanna wear gloves
- because I have a lot of blue food dye.
- Yes. Yes.
- Okay.
- So
- Sliving plastic gloves
- [laughs]
- so we don't dye our fingers.
- Do you do it over your lace gloves?
Yes. These are my, like,
sliving cooking gloves.
I just do everything in them.
I love my gloves.
Okay, we'll start with the cloud.
[Paris] Yes.
Gonna try a Chanel.
I don't know if this is gonna work.
The key is gonna be to get it outta here.
I wish these were, like, harder.
- I did this last night. What the hell.
- [Kim] Oh man.
[Paris laughs]
- This is gonna be a disaster.
- Come on.
[Kim] This looks like slime.
[Paris] I'm gonna grab powdered sugar.
I feel like this is how it used to be.
Paris would have the ideas,
and I'd be like, "This is never gonna
work out. Like, this is not practical."
You're the organized one. I'm, like,
the most disorganized person in the world.
[upbeat bass and percussion play]
This might work. We got one. [laughs]
Oh, that's cute.
Killing it.
If this was cookies, it would work, right?
[laughs]
I'm gonna need
to, like, touch up my makeup,
- I'm literally crying.
- [laughs]
The fact that you thought
these marshmallows could work.
Oh my God. Oh my God.
Wait, do I have blue all over my face?
A tiny, above your eyebrow,
but it's, like, a little.
And it has glitter,
so it looks like makeup.
Hold on, I'll just do it very lightly.
[sniffs] Okay.
I'm so curious to see
if the plastic one's different.
[Paris] I know.
- [Kim] Oh, wait.
- Oh, that's cute.
- The plastic ones totally work better.
- Fuck yes.
- [Kim] Hey, that's cute.
- [Paris] Yeah, yours is cute. My star's
It's, like, 3D.
- That's cute. I like that.
- [Kim] Cute!
I think we just go like this.
Assuming Never done this.
Like, stay back.
I don't wanna, like, kill anyone.
- Oh.
- Oh.
- [Kim] I love that.
- [Paris] I've never done this before.
- It's like crème brûlée.
- It's so cute.
[breezy pop music plays]
[Paris] Nice. Nice.
I feel like those will be good
on the little clouds.
[Kim] It's, like, looking extra toasty.
It's really cute.
- [music fades]
- [Paris] Powdered sugar.
Learn a new thing every day.
So, what else you been doing
during quarantine?
I've had to see the chiropractor a lot
'cause I've been sleeping
in, like, forts and kids' rooms.
It's been really fun.
But I'm excited to put on makeup
and come over here.
- Yes.
- And do something with a human being
other than my kids, you know?
- [Paris] I'm glad you're cooking with me.
- [laughs] Me too.
Let's look at our little thing.
- "Make French toast."
- Okay.
[Paris] How to make
Frosted Flakes French toast.
Picture French toast dipped in
Frosted Flakes.
I actually know how to make French toast.
- So do I. How do you make it?
- You know how?
- Yeah.
- Um
- Eggs and milk.
- I take eggs.
- And a bit of vanilla.
- Oh, I haven't tried that yet.
Put vanilla mixed in with the eggs.
- Vanilla extract?
- Uh-huh.
I bought that yesterday.
And then you take the bread
and you soak it in that.
- Okay.
- And then you put it on the pan.
Okay. I like that.
Okay, let's get the batter ready first.
- [breezy romantic music plays]
- This, that, vanilla extract.
Okay, so we need a bowl.
Eggs. Milk. Grab all that.
This looks good.
Is this a dog bowl though?
[music stops]
- No.
- No, it's human.
I don't cook in dog bowls.
[Paris] No.
But you never know.
[breezy romantic music continues]
- [Paris] The bread, obviously.
- Yes.
[Kim] Does that look about right?
- A little more?
- I think so. Maybe more. More eggs.
[Kim] More eggs?
- [Paris] Yeah. And milk.
- [Kim] Okay.
I feel like this bread is so thick,
- it will suck it up in a second.
- Okay.
[breezy romantic music continues]
[Paris] So
Cereal.
Which pan are we gonna do it in?
- The pink one?
- [Paris] Yeah.
Yes. This feels about ready.
[upbeat bass rhythm plays]
Nice.
Slide this guy in here.
I've never done this.
I had this once, like, at Swingers.
I used to, like, go there after clubbing.
- They'd have this French toast
- I think you have to cook
- No.
- Is that gonna work?
- [Kim] I don't know.
- [Paris] Let's see.
[both chuckle]
[sizzling]
[Paris] I think it's working.
- It'll be really good if we figure it out.
- Higher. So good.
Why does this keep turning brown?
'Cause it's just cooking. It's fine.
- It gives it a little
- [Paris] Beyond.
- [Kim] Should I flip it or you want to?
- [Paris] You can do it.
[whimsical jazz plays]
[Paris] Ooh.
- [Kim] I know.
- That looks cool.
[Kim] Wait, there's smoke everywhere.
- [Paris] Did I put it too hot?
- Maybe.
[Paris] Yeah, it's, like Oh shit.
- Oh no.
- [laughs]
[Paris] Great.
Light the house on fire.
[upbeat whimsical music plays]
[Kim] This looks, like, so professional.
Literally.
Just go like that.
Now it's good.
Nice.
[Kim] You guys,
does this not look amazing, or what?
[Paris] Loves.
Wolfgang Puck and Gordon Ramsay in here.
"Make frittata."
Have you made a frittata before?
No. Have you?
- [Paris] No.
- [laughs]
Okay, this is going to be
either really easy or really difficult.
[Paris] How to make a fluffy frittata.
You'll need:
[dinging]
It's like making an omelet,
but it takes longer
and it goes in the oven.
Do you eat bacon?
I got turkey bacon and normal.
- We can do turkey bacon.
- Yeah.
I'm the same, 'cause I had
Remember Princess Pigelette,
my pig that I had?
I'm scared to, like
Not scared.
I feel bad to eat pigs after her,
because she was my child.
- [upbeat bass rhythm]
- "To the blender add six eggs,
heavy whipping cream, onion powder."
- [Kim] Do you have a blender?
- [Paris] This or that?
Is that the same as a blender?
[Kim] I don't know.
My sisters use that all the time.
It is. It is a blender.
- [Paris] Yes.
- [producer] Blender, blender, blender.
- [Kim] Oh.
- That?
- [producer] Yeah.
- This?
- [producer] Yes.
- [Paris] Okay.
- So the blender.
- [Kim] Okay.
So let's put six eggs.
[upbeat whimsical music plays]
[Paris] Plug this guy in.
[Kim] Whoops!
Yes.
[Kim] Will you cut these in
"Ten small tomatoes."
Just cut 'em in half.
[Paris] This better not squirt on me.
I'll be so annoyed.
Probably should have thought twice
about wearing white in the kitchen,
but I was trying to color-coordinate
with the balloons.
[Kim] "Half a teaspoon of onion powder."
- Oh my God. These are cute, the cherries.
- [Paris] I know. How cute are they?
- [Kim] So cute.
- [Paris] Obsessed.
[Paris] Okay.
Oops. Cut my finger off.
[Kim] "Pinch of salt and pepper."
Let me secure the lid.
- "Set aside. Do not blend yet." Okay.
- [music fades]
"Cut three strips of bacon
into one-inch pieces."
- [Kim] Like that?
- [Paris] It's all gonna mix.
- One inch.
- [Kim] Does that look like an inch?
I don't know. I don't have a,
whatever it's called, measuring thing.
Close enough.
"Add bacon to cast-iron skillet."
"Cook for eight to ten minutes." Okay.
[breezy jazz music plays]
[Paris] I think we put the tomatoes in
when those are cooked more.
[sizzling]
How did you learn how to do all this?
When Kourtney went away to college,
my mom, she was hysterically crying.
We were like, "What's wrong?" She's like,
"I never taught Kourtney how to cook."
So, she was like, "I want you girls
to, like, watch and learn
and see how it's done."
- Nice.
- Do you have tongs?
What's a tong?
- It's a thing like
- Like those?
that picks up things.
Silver. Metal.
[Paris] No. Um, I have to.
You have to.
[Paris] Where is a tong-y?
[lively whimsical music plays]
[Paris] Hmm.
Um
Oh, there's one.
- Okay.
- This?
- Yeah.
- Tong. I didn't know it was called that.
I just called it, like,
"the picking upping thing."
- [breezy pop music]
- [Paris] Cooking tip.
These are tongs.
[Kim] I'd be really concerned if we were
stuck on a stranded island together.
Me too. I'd bring, like, glitter. [laughs]
[breezy pop music]
All right. Blend this bitch.
Puree, liquefy, ice crush, or smoothie?
- [Kim] Any of it will blend the eggs.
- [Paris] Yes. Yes.
[blender whirring]
- Oh my God!
- Oh God!
[blender stops]
I'm just concerned
that these bacon strips are big.
I didn't realize what they were for.
[bacon sizzling]
[Paris] Oh. Yeah.
Do we want to eat a big chunk of bacon
in our frittata?
At least it's not real bacon. It's turkey.
I know. But the size. When we eat it,
we don't want this huge chunk.
- Yeah.
- I would've wanted half this size.
I think it's bigger than an inch.
[Kim] Should I take 'em out
and try to cut 'em?
[Paris] I don't know. [chuckles] Try.
[whimsical jazz plays]
Try.
Don't, like, burn yourself.
- Okay, can I trust you to
- [Paris] Yeah.
- watch this just for a minute?
- [Paris] Yeah.
[music fades]
- Yes.
- And I'll be right back.
[laughs]
- Yeah. Perfect.
- Okay.
[whimsical jazz continues]
All right, it's
We're looking good.
Very tan.
I feel like you can put the eggs in.
I just don't know if I trust you.
Do you feel like
you're cooking with North?
[chuckles]
- Or is she a better cook than I am?
- [Kim] It's definitely just as fun.
Yes.
[Kim] Nice. Baby bacons.
So we just pour this in, it says?
[Paris] Yeah.
Nice.
- Okay.
- [Paris] I'm gonna, like, mix.
[Kim] "Half a cup of Parmesan."
- That's a lot.
- "Sprinkled" I know.
- "Over the top."
- [Paris] Um
You're not supposed to leave this
in the thing to cook in here.
[Paris] Oh.
[whimsical jazz continues]
[Paris] Yes.
"Transfer to oven."
- Hell yes.
- [Kim] Okay.
[Paris chuckles]
Loves it. [chuckles]
And that's hot. Literally.
I'm so happy
that we learned how to make this.
Yeah, I'm sure you're gonna be doing it
over and over.
Well, next year,
when I'm married and having babies,
I will be doing this.
[Kim laughs]
[Kim] I'm so excited
I know how to make a frittata.
So 12 minutes. Okay.
So if it were me, in my kitchen, this is
when you take the 12 minutes to clean.
Okay.
- [breezy pop music]
- [Paris] Cooking tip.
Kitchens don't clean themselves.
Bummer!
[Kim] You wanna put it all
in the dishwasher?
Is this clean stuff?
I don't know. Are they the same thing?
[lively whimsical music plays]
- So this is a bit messed up. Crystals?
- You don't put that in the dishwasher.
- I feel like it's hand-wash, right?
- [Kim] Yeah.
- [Paris] You're so responsible.
- [Kim] Really? I have to clean as I go.
This burnt stuff, I don't know where this
[Paris] I'm learning a lot today.
- [Kim] Where's the trash?
- [Paris] Right next to the
whatever it's called.
Dishwasher.
- Oh yeah, we should put the timer on.
- Oh yeah.
I feel so grown-up.
So responsible. Like a hot housewife.
[laughs]
Literally.
[timer rings]
[Kim] I don't know.
Was that really 12 minutes?
[Paris] No idea.
Oh my God, it smells so good.
- [Paris] Is it raw still or is it
- [Kim] I don't know.
[Paris] I didn't know eggs
could turn into a cloud.
Yes! We did it. [chuckles]
- Are you hungry?
- [Kim] I am.
- Let's go eat.
- Okay.
["Destination Moon"
by Dinah Washington plays]
Come and take a trip in my rocket ship ♪
We'll have a lovely afternoon ♪
Kiss the world goodbye ♪
And away we'll fly ♪
Destination moon ♪
[music fades]
[Paris] Breakfast time!
[Kim] This looks so good.
First of all, the cutest.
Yes. [chuckles]
All my cooking utensils
are just, like, very Paris.
[Kim] You should do
a Paris line of cookware.
[Paris] I know, right?
[romantic music plays]
- Thank you. Yes.
- You want some?
Wow!
This frittata fluffy thing looks insane.
I wonder Well, we'll try it first,
and then, if it needs salt
Mmm.
- [Kim] Mmm.
- [Paris] Mm-hmm.
- Are we good or what?
- I can't believe we made this. [laughs]
- It tastes like a restaurant.
- [Kim] This is restaurant-worthy.
Try the marshmallow.
It's gonna be insane with this.
Oh my God.
[Paris] Mm-mm.
This is some of the best French toast
I've ever had.
[Paris] Mm-mm-mm-mm-mm.
- Mmm.
- Wait. I spoke too soon.
I just got a Frosted Flake.
It's like a crunchy, chewy ball.
It's good, but if that got harder,
it would have broke my tooth.
- Uh-oh.
- [Kim laughs]
[both laugh]
- [Paris] How's your mom?
- [Kim] She's good.
We're all just, like,
excited to have a break.
We're done filming.
- Twenty seasons. That's crazy.
- Twenty seasons.
- So now I have time to cook, with you.
- Yes.
[chuckles]
[Paris] We had such crazy adventures
when we were younger.
[Kim] Oh my God. I just remember
- I think it was Amsterdam.
- Ibiza.
- Oh my God, Amsterdam.
- Okay, Ibiza.
We were sleeping in tents
at Jade Jagger's house.
- She had tents outside.
- I forgot about that.
- We had tepees.
- [Kim] Yeah, tepees.
And we we stayed in tepees.
And you were like,
"Okay, we're gonna wake up at midnight."
- "We're gonna go to dinner at 1."
- Hmm.
"We're gonna go to the club around 3."
"And then we're gonna go
to this foam party at, like, 5 or 6."
- That was crazy.
- [Kim] So crazy.
- [laughs]
- Like, every Vegas trip.
- We'd be dancing in the cabanas.
- [Kim] Yeah.
Then, like, a.m., we'd be spinning.
- We'd go in the DJ booth.
- Yeah. Oh my God.
Yeah.
We had so many adventures.
No one has partied as hard as you
and looks the way you do.
- Thank you.
- Like, it's like unheard of.
[laughing] I'm an alien.
I know you don't wanna hear this,
but I hear your forties
- are your best years.
- I don't know what that is. [chuckles]
[laughs]
[Paris laughs]
I feel like I've been living
like a 21-year-old for my entire life,
and now I feel like I'm ready to move on.
I can't wait to meet, like, Paris the mom.
- We have to do playdates when it happens.
- Yeah.
[breezy jazz music plays]
[Paris] This was so delicious,
but so much work.
I'll always love Lucky Charms,
but at least I know if I have to,
I can slay a real home-cooked breakfast.
[sweeping romantic music plays]