Creeped Out (2017) s02e07 Episode Script

Splinta Claws

The Curious.
They say he collects strange tales.
And if you ever hear his whistle, you know something creepy is about to unfold.
Everyone knows there are nice children as well as naughty.
But are there good and bad Santas as well? If the real jolly St.
Nick brings you joy, then what might a fake, jinxed St.
Nick bring? Merry Christmas! So remember to, uh, write your Christmas wishes to Santa, and you can post them in the North Pole postbox just here.
I'm watching you! Always watching, to see if you've been a good child-child-chi-child, or-or-or-or a naughty child! I hope you're being bad! Ba-ba-ba-bad! Ba-ba-ba-bad! Ba-ba-ba-bad! Ba-ba-ba-bad! Ba-ba-ba-bad! Ba-ba-ba-bad! Ba-ba-ba-bad! Ba-ba-ba-bad! Ho-ho-ho, ho-ho-ho, ho-ho-ho-ho-ho-ho Ho-oo-o! Hey! Hey, hey, hey, hey! - What did you do? - It wasn't my fault! Right! Where are your parents? Whose kid is this? What did you do, Lawrence? Doesn't matter.
I'm so sorry.
I'll make sure he doesn't get into any more trouble.
Lawrence, please, just for today try extra hard.
- With Granny in hospital, it's - I'm sorry, Mom.
I just I didn't think.
I always mess things up.
I'm really sorry, Mom.
It's okay.
We just have to keep you busy.
- Thank you.
- No problem.
I've had this necklace made for Granny.
It's glass made using Grandad's ashes.
Grandad is in here? It's very precious.
It will mean the world to her.
And me.
There's a free Christmas mailing service upstairs.
Can you take it up for me? It's all labeled.
- You just have to drop it in the box.
- She'll be all right.
What can I help you with, sir? Ooh! We're gonna need the big bottle.
- Mom, you almost done? - Hello? "McFly!" You're staying at Lawrence's tonight, remember? Oh, yeah, here's the thing.
I thought I'd stay with you tonight, keep you company.
- We can watch Red Run.
- Oh, Mikey.
If I could, I'd hold onto you forever.
But I want you to live a normal boy's life! Have fun! The last time I did that, I messed up everything.
You're worried 'cause this is your first night away since the accident.
We're in a good place, Mikey.
We're through the worst, and it's time.
You need to stop doing things for me, and start doing them for yourself.
And when you get back tomorrow, I'm on shift.
So go home, relax.
Be a boy.
Oh, I forgot my key, so Take mine.
The landlady can let me in.
Okay.
Hi, quick question about the shifts No! No, no, no, no, no! Stop! Hold on! Whoa, whoa, whoa! You again? Where do you think you're going?! My grandad's in there! No, look, it's a present for my granny, and she's really ill! - And if you'll just let me have a look - Santa knows when you're lying, you know.
Get out of here before I call security.
You are banned from the North Pole.
Ladies and gentlemen, the store will be closing in ten minutes.
Are you a nice child, or a naughty child? I'm a naughty child.
A wink of my eye and a twist of my head will soon let you know you have nothing to dread.
Here's Santa Clau-Clau-Clau-Clau-Clau He keeps doing it.
All right, let's turn it off and on again.
Oi! What'd I say? Get out of here before I call security.
Go on! You know, I heard a story about this thing.
About 30-something years ago, a power surge blew its metal hands apart.
Left them as these jagged, splintered claws.
Apparently it went absolutely berserk before they rewired it.
But they never got 'round to fixing the hands, they just covered 'em up.
With a wink of my eye and a twist of my head I see you nestled all snug in your bed.
- Did you deliver Granny's present okay? - Yeah.
How hopeless do you think I am? Okay, we're off.
Oh! I forget, are you staying at Mikey's house tonight, or is he staying with us? - Lawrence? - Um, I'm staying at Mikey's, obvs.
Don't get into any trouble, okay? Peltzer's is closing in five minutes.
Please make your way out of the store.
Thank you, and Merry Christmas.
Hey.
Where's your mom? Oh, dear.
I've dropped my ball.
Grab that for me, will you? Hey! Lawrence, get off! - What you doing? - I lost my grandad in the North Pole.
I need to get him back.
I figure we wait here 'til everyone's gone, get the present, walk home.
It's genius.
- Are you crazy?! - Shh! Do you know how much is wrong with this plan? - They have cameras! - The cameras are for shoplifters.
They turn them off at night.
I saw it on Night Guard.
My mom could lose her job, Lawrence.
- Because if we get caught - We won't get caught.
If you go out there now, then we will get caught! Then what? Peltzer's is now closing.
Please make your way to the exits.
Thank you, and Merry Christmas.
Want a chocolate mint? Might be here a while.
This is awesome! Come on, let's go explore! Awesome for you, 'cause you don't think about consequences.
- Meanwhile, I'm stuck here with foresight.
- Hey! Check this out.
Silent night Holy night I is calm Mike is not Look, can we just go and get the present, please? This is my mom's work.
Come on.
Where's your Christmas spirit? - What you doing? - I haven't done anything yet.
Where's the elf police now, huh? Probably at home watching Red Run.
- They all look the same! - Hurry up! Found it! Ah.
Hey, I fou - What? - Naughty child! All through the house, not a creature was stirring, not even a mouse! Mouse, mou-ma-ma-ma-ma-mouse, mouse! - Phew! That was crazy! - That was close! Mouse, mouse, mouse, mouse, mouse I've been watching you! I know if you've been bad or good this year.
Little boy and girl land.
Once you pass its borders, you Ground floor.
Please mind the doors.
Come on! Come on, come on, come on! I'm making a list of who's naughty and nice.
And where is First floor.
Please mind the doors.
Did you see that? It came right for me! It must of thought I'd stolen one of the presents or something.
Think? It's a dancing Santa! You saw it, Mikey! It's alive, and it doesn't need power! - So give the present back? - No! My grandad's in it! There's no way I'm giving this up.
Besides, we're safe now.
What's it gonna do? Come up the stairs? First floor.
Please mind the doors.
Here's Splinta Claus! I know! Maybe it's a prank.
We're being pranked, there's cameras filming us, and this is all going to be a million funny views.
Yeah, easy for you to say! It's not coming for you, is it? - It's a dumb - Shh! It's a dumb Santa, Lawrence! How could it possibly hurt us? So you be good, or pay the price! Uh This does not scream "prank" to me! Uh Where'd it go? All grown up, my dears through the years, that go so swiftly by.
It senses us.
- Just give him the present back! - No, I'm not giving this up! - My mom would be devastated! - Would you rather she lose you? Naughty child! Nice child! It's not after me! It's after you! Nice child! You gotta admit, I was pretty heroic just now.
You owe me what we call a "life debt.
" - What did you mean he was coming for me? - Granddad! Nice child.
That thing's indestructible! It's not coming for the presents, and it's not coming after me.
This Santa's backwards, Mikey.
It comes for nice children instead of naughty ones.
And you couldn't be any nicer.
What Santa punishes nice children? It had a power overload.
It's all screwy.
Plus someone someone may have messed with the wiring just a little by accident.
Who messed with its wiring? Well you know, the naughty kid.
- Look, I'm sorry! I'm sorry! - "I'm sorry.
" That's your get-out-of-jail card, isn't it? - Every time! - Ho-ho-ho! Look, I'm gonna put this right.
If you don't mind being bait.
"Bait"? Well, get out! Now! You couldn't talk me through the plan first? You know me.
I don't actually have one 'til it's happening.
That is some nightmare fuel right there.
Why is it taking off its mittens? Ho-ho-ho! Ho-ho-ho! Ho-ho-ho! Ho-ho-ho! Here's Splinta Claws! Come on.
Come on! Maybe if we get a lock pick from the keycutting stand and jimmy the locks! The doors are controlled electronically.
We need a hacker, not a locksmith.
Ho-ho-ho! - Run, Mikey! - I can't run much more, Lawrence.
No, just a little bit longer 'til I figure something out! - Ah - Come on, Mikey! He can't go upstairs.
Agh-hh! - Oh - Come on! I know you can do it, Mikey! Keep pushing! Come on, Mikey, keep going! Do something bad, Mikey, and he'll leave you alone! - If you just do something naughty - What? - My mom could lose her job.
- Well, do something naughty! It's the only way to stop him coming for you! Whoa.
Naughty child! This is some twisted Christmas.
- All right? - Yeah.
Come on.
- That was amazing, Mikey! You saved us! - I didn't save anyone.
You saw it.
It stopped.
We're both naughty now.
I'm not like you! - What does that mean? - My mom could lose her job.
No one will find out.
I'll figure something out.
"I'll figure something out.
" Another one of Lawrence's catchphrases.
Right along with "Sorry, sorry," when it goes wrong! Like it always does.
You know, you're like one of them pull-string dolls with your catchphrases.
"I'll figure something out! I'll figure something out! I'll figure something out! I'll figure something out! I'm sorry! I'll figure something out!" What is that? My mom's staff keycard.
The kind that opens doors, Mikey? - I forgot I had it.
I didn't realize! - I would have realized! You see that's the difference between me and you.
My mouth might go a million miles per hour, but so does my brain too! That's how it always gets out of stuff! Unlike you.
Look what you did! Leave it, Mikey.
You're being good again.
Splinta Claws will come for us.
These are people's wishes.
- They're important.
- Really? - Come on, just leave it.
- "I really want a red fire engine.
" Real important.
"Give me the game system my mom won't buy for me.
" Not even a "Dear, Santa.
" "I wish I wasn't such a burden.
" That has your handwriting on it.
Do you think you're a burden? Does your mom say that? I just don't want her to.
She's given up so much for me.
Mikey, you're no burden.
You're perfect.
Too perfect.
Splinta Claws knows.
Do you see what you did? The main entrance doors have shutters, but this back one's an emergency door so it's not blocked.
I've been through it with my mom.
On the other side is a staircase that leads to an alleyway.
But there's no reader on the outside door, so once we're through, we can't come back.
This is just like the end of Red Run.
There.
Come on.
- Oh, no.
No, no, no! No, no! - I've gotta go back for my grandad, Mikey.
Don't wait for me.
Once you get out, just go.
I'll be right behind you.
I need the keycard for the outside door.
You won't be able to get through.
Please don't do this.
Come on.
I'll be okay.
I'm a naughty child, remember? Stay there.
Oh, no.
Nice child! Ho-ho-ho! Ho-ho-ho-ho-ho-ho-ho No, you don't! Leave my friend alone! Where are you? I heard the door.
Was that you? No yeah! That was me.
I'm right behind you.
You're definitely clear? Are you sure? 'Cause once I'm through this outside door, I can't come back.
I'm sure, Mikey.
Just go! - Okay, I'm out.
Hurry.
- I will.
I'm a good boy? I'm a good boy? Welcome to Joyland, a mystic, merry toyland.
Once you pass its border, you can never return again.
Come on, come on, come on, come on! Ho-ho-ho! Help! No! You're out of power! Eat it! - It's not out of power.
- Mikey, how'd you get back in? I never left.
We've known each other since nursery, Lawrence.
- You're a terrible liar.
- I'm an excellent liar! - How are you doing that? - Oh, he knows.
- Knows what? - When you're being good or bad, and we're both going to be really bad.
Aren't we, Lawrence? Mikey, what are you doing? If we're gonna get your grandad and get out of here, we need to do something really naughty, completely selfish.
- Like what? - Like save ourselves instead of all the other boys and girls.
Agreed? Well? Nice child.
Is there really any such thing as a naughty child and a nice child? Or are there really only naughty acts and nice acts, and we can change from one to the other any time we wish? Have a creepy Christmas, and a curious New Year.

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