Dawson's Creek s01e08 Episode Script

Boyfriend

Dawson's Creek - Season 01 - Episode 07 "Boyfriend" Boring.
Seen it.
Wouldn't watch if you paid me.
Rerun.
Home shopping.
Spanish.
Japanese.
Lebanese? Adult movie channel, scrambled American Movie Classics it is.
- Who? - John Doe.
The one in the speech.
- Hey, Jo.
- Hey.
Remember that guy who went on a killing spree and was found innocent after claiming sleep deprivation? Yeah.
He went postal.
Took out half of that restaurant.
Well, I think I need to call his lawyer.
Bessie and Bodie's new edition still pulling a day for a night? I swear to God, Dawson, my sister gave birth to Rosemary's baby.
I mean, I haven't slept for days, and my GPA's taking a nosedive and last week I got caught in a pool of drool in European history.
That's pretty.
- Well, crash here.
- You sure? Yeah.
No drooling, though.
Dawson, are you still on this old movie classic kick? It's time you take a stroll down New Releases Lane.
I've seen everything in the video store twice and trust me, there's nothing on the tube.
Dawson, Gary Cooper's kind of a snoozer.
Exactly.
See, in the '40s you could be a well-intentioned geek and still end up with the girl.
Whatever happened to the standard Gary Cooper-types, you know? Likable, but not too self-involved.
Smart without being arrogant.
I mean, come on.
What happened to that guy? That's what I thought.
So, big meeting with the investors this morning? You're interviewing the police commissioner? At 1 0:00.
- You look great.
- So do you.
- Thanks.
- You are welcome.
- Sorry.
- It's okay.
- Dr.
Keenan's at 3:00? - Right.
He says we're making progress.
Yep, he does.
Dawson.
- Have some breakfast.
- Take a load off.
I can't.
I'm running late this morning.
- How's school going? - Fine.
Great.
I gotta go.
Yeah, well So Big meeting with the investors this morning? Same one as two and a half minutes ago.
You know, this town is the absolute embodiment of dull.
Apart from the occasional sex scandal provided by yours truly, nothing happens here.
Oh, man.
You know, I swear, one day this town is just gonna shut down completely due to lack of interest.
Hey, watch it, man! Listen, maybe you can help me out.
With what, driving lessons? No, but that's that's really cute.
- I'm looking for the high school.
- Capeside High? Yeah.
You gonna help me out, or I gotta ask Captain Ahab there? Oh, yeah, yeah.
Sorry.
All right.
You want to take this road about another mile down, right? Take a left on Blanton Street You're probably gonna have to write this down, sport.
No.
Total recall.
Right.
So you get to that first stop sign after the rotary and you take a left.
The school's right there.
You can't miss it.
Actually, you know what? I'm headed in that direction right now so if you wanted to give me a ride, I'd be happy to navigate for you.
And ride with such a reckless driver? Come on Does that sound smart to you? Yes, good baby Bodie, I need to dry my hair.
This is my dresser.
Well, I'm gonna be late for work.
You look like hell.
The human alarm clock kept me up.
I overslept, and I didn't have time to cram for my Spanish test.
I know things have been crazy since Alexander was born but it's the first time for Bodie and I and the learning curve's been steep.
I promise things will settle down just as soon as we get through this adjustment period.
Yeah.
When will that be? - Two, three years, max.
- Wonderful.
Thanks, Dawson.
I really appreciate this.
Not a problem.
I just wish they'd teach some more useful Spanish phrases.
Where's the girlfriend this morning? Haven't seen her.
Pay attention.
"My uncle's bicycle is from Mexico.
" That's it.
You're brilliant.
It was just, you know, you haven't said much lately.
Things between you and Jen okay? Everything going swimmingly? Great.
I mean, I admit it got a little bit rough there for a little while, but Yeah.
Things are going great.
Good.
That's really good.
- Bueno.
- Oh, yeah.
Bueno.
- Hey.
I was hoping to see you.
- Hey, how are you? - Good.
- Come on.
- I like your vest.
- Thank you.
Here's your book.
Good luck.
Thanks.
And you I assume we're still on for bowling tonight? Absolutely.
Can't wait.
- I'll see you guys.
- Bye, Joey.
So can I walk you to math? Actually Damn.
You know, I forgot Can I catch up with you later, Dawson? Yeah? Yeah.
I'll see you in class, okay? - Okay.
- Okay.
All right.
Billy, what the hell are you doing here? That's how you greet the love of your life? I'm sorry.
Hello, Billy.
Please leave.
- No.
- I drove all night just to see you.
New York's only four hours from here.
I got lost? Billy, do you have any idea what my grandmother would do if she knew you were here? The reason my parents sent me here was to get me away from you.
Billy, things have changed, okay? I've changed, and I'm not the same person All right.
Then tell me about it.
Look, go for a ride with me and you can fill me in on all the advances.
Huh? Come on, two minutes.
Is that too much to ask for? All right, Billy.
But I'm keeping time.
- Dawson.
- Hi.
I'm looking for Jen.
Do you know where she is this period? No, I don't.
Sorry.
Give her a message, will you? I'm having a barbecue Saturday and I'd love it if she can make it.
Hey, what the hell.
Why don't you come too? Cool.
Sounds great.
And one other thing.
I don't know if you can help me with it.
Jen doesn't have a boyfriend, does she? Yeah.
She does.
- Me.
- Really? - Yeah.
- That's terrific, man.
What about sailing lessons? Or fencing? No, no, no, no.
What about scuba diving? How does that sound? Expensive.
You need tanks and fins.
Those aren't cheap.
And then some overpaid instructor at 40 bucks an hour.
Of course, you're the breadwinner, so it's really not my call.
Well, I would love to do it, Mitch.
Dr.
Keenan wants us to experience new things we haven't done before.
Well, hey, why didn't you say so? We've never tried swinging or spouse-swapping.
Wouldn't that be more appealing to your recreational tastes? When will you stop punishing me? When I can get the vision of my naked wife playing hide the When it stops hurting.
Billy, being here has been good for me so if I could somehow, without being too rude ask you to leave? Okay.
But help me out here, Jen.
I'm way too beat to make this ride tonight and I'm strapped for hotel money so just find me a place to crash for the night and I'm out of here by morning.
- Everything okay? Dawson.
Hi.
Everything's fine.
It was Hey, how's it going? Billy Konrad.
Billy's an old friend of mine from New York.
- Can I talk to you for one second? - Yeah.
I know this is kind of awkward, but would it be okay tonight if Billy stayed at your house? - Stay with me for the night? I don't even know him.
I just met him.
I don't know anything about him.
- What do you wanna know? - I don't know where to start.
First, is he really a friend or is he something more? Dawson, first of all, I've already told you about Billy.
Is he the guy? He's Mr.
Got Caught Doing It In Your Parents' Bed? Yes, but it's completely over between Billy and I and I told him everything about us, and that I'm with you now.
But he is still my friend and only my friend and I'd appreciate it if you could give him a place to crash for the night.
Believe me, Dawson anything Billy ever meant to me, you now mean 1 0 times that.
Please, Dawson.
For me.
- Thank you, sir.
- Yeah, no problem.
Thank you, Dawson.
So this must be pretty weird for you, huh? - What's that? - Having me here.
Having your girlfriend's ex sharing your bedroom.
That's gotta be a real trip, man.
- It's only till tomorrow, so - Yeah, right.
That's what Jenny said, tomorrow, right? So, what are you, anyway, some sort of film buff? Something like that, yeah.
- Now this is cute.
- That's a collector's item.
If you're gonna stay another day, Jen and I should know.
Okay, how about this? I'm not leaving tomorrow.
I have no intention of leaving until Jen's come back to me.
So the question is, what do you do about it, Dawson? Do you have Daddy throw me out? Do you remove me personally from the premises? Have a sense of humor, man.
Look at you.
You are all torqued up over nothing.
Yeah.
I'll probably split tomorrow.
But in the meantime, you and I should take advantage of our newfound closeness here.
I'll bet you're dying to get to know what Jen was like in New York.
So shoot.
Ask away.
Billy, I already know all about you and Jen and her life in New York.
So nothing I'm curious about, no information I'm fishing for, okay? She gave you the headlines.
Caught in bed, shipped up here to get away from me et cetera and so on.
But did she give you the details? Did she fill in the blanks that make a story a story? Because my guess is, there's a lot you don't know, Dawson.
My guess is, you don't know the half of it.
Joey, I really need to talk to you.
My life is becoming a punch line to some seriously disturbed joke.
If you wake him up, your life will be over.
- So, what is the problem? - You know how yesterday I said that everything between Jen and me was great? Now it's not.
It's a mess.
Her ex-boyfriend is here and he's staying at my house.
Oh, so that's who that cute guy was in school.
You're not helping.
What's the big deal? I mean, I thought you were with Jen.
- You guys are a couple, right? - Of course.
So? Well, it's just that Mr.
Smooth rides into town and all of a sudden bowling sounded lame.
Dawson, bowling always sounds lame.
Look, Billy's staying at my house, which I hate.
Okay, but if I kick him out, I look petty and insecure.
If I let him stay, I feel like a patsy.
- I mean - Well I'm beginning to think relationship problems run in my family.
I hate to break it to you, but your problems really aren't that original.
You know, divorce and dysfunction run rampant in this town Dysfunction I can handle.
Divorce How much pain and humiliation can a relationship endure before it's reached the point of no return? Are we talking about the father or the son here? Dawson, relax.
Don't worry about it.
It'll all blow over, and you'll be on to bigger and better problems.
- You think so? - Don't worry.
- I should sit tight? - It's all gonna be fine.
Right.
Thanks.
You're the best.
I really did want to let you know how much I appreciate your generosity in giving him a place to crash and everything.
Billy's not exactly here to watch the leaves change color is he, Jen? No.
Didn't think so.
I think he's here to get you back.
I don't know whether you think I'm super-evolved or just plain oblivious.
Look, Dawson, I told him it's over.
I told him about us.
You know that.
He's not getting the message.
And I don't think you want him to.
Hey, Dawson, I don't want to lie to you, so yeah, Billy still has feelings for me.
I mean, we never really got a chance to say goodbye.
My parents threw me out so fast, there wasn't time for closure.
You wanted to make a break from those guys who sexualized you.
Billy wasn't one of them.
He was the only guy who treated me with respect.
He treated me well.
So you're going back to him? - You have to think about that? - It's just not that simple, all right? - It's confusing.
- We're invited to a party at Cliff Elliot's.
I want you to come.
I want things to go back to normal, and I want Billy gone.
I can't just send him away.
Of course.
He's treated you with nothing but respect.
But you know what, Jen? The last time I checked, so did I.
How do I get repaid? By having the guy who's had you from Battery Park to your parents' bed dumped on me.
Dawson, come on.
Be fair to me, all right? Look, this isn't the easiest situation in the world for me either.
Imagine if some ex-girlfriend of yours suddenly showed up to town and put everything in a whirlwind You know what, Jen? That's impossible, okay? Because I don't have an ex-girlfriend.
You're my girlfriend, my first and only.
All I'm trying to do is prevent Billy's ex from becoming my ex too.
My feelings for you haven't changed, Dawson, can't you see that? Try and understand.
Unfortunately, I think I do.
Look, I need to rent The English Patient.
May I suggest a movie that doesn't completely blow? It was on last night and it put the baby to sleep.
It's the only thing that's put him to sleep.
And if he doesn't sleep, then I don't and I get angry.
I don't maintain my sunny disposition.
If you have the slightest bit of human decency you'll rent it to me and bring 1 81 minutes of peace in my otherwise wretched life.
- Please? - All right.
But in my professional opinion you don't need a video store.
You need a pharmacy.
Anyway, I hear Jen's ex has been lurking around Capeside.
Met the strapping young fellow yet? Oh, yeah.
He's a real charmer.
Just about lost three toes to a pair of his steel-belted radials.
So, what's the party line? Think she'll go back to him? - Return to her wanton New York ways? - You know, I really don't know but if Jen did ditch Dawson for Billy the Kid wouldn't that please a certain someone we both know? You know me, Pacey.
I'm not one to stand in the way of true love.
But if Jen has a connection to this guy, which it seems like she does What can we do about it? I've never really taken a particular interest in your life, because frankly, your life has never been particularly interesting.
But there is one thing I need to know.
You're really, really enjoying the fact that Jen's ex is in town, aren't you? It's intriguing, Pacey.
Even you have to admit that.
But you know what? This is the wedge you've been waiting for to drive Jen and Dawson apart.
No, Pacey.
You're such - It's not like that at all.
- We've been friends too long.
And up until now, I've just stood idly by and watched this go down.
But it's time to lay this on the line, okay? You have some raging hormonal obsession for our friend Dawson and you just can't wait to get your hooks into him but good, can you? Huh? Bite me, Pacey.
Busted.
Hey, be kind, rewind.
- What is the big deal? - The instruction was pretty basic.
Never be more than three feet from your buddy.
Now that's ironic.
Me getting bitched at for floating away from you.
The teacher said if the tank was leaking and the oxygen ran out, or I were caught in a kelp bed We were in a pool, Gale, all right? What is the worst that could happen, we bump our heads on a slide? That is not the point.
Look, I can't do this by myself.
If you're gonna fight therapy every step of the way then we're both wasting time.
So let me know because if that's the case, then we might as well - Can I take your order? - Let's see You know, everything's really good.
- Hey, Joey, table five.
- Miss, I think I'll have some coffee.
- All right, in one second.
- What can I get you? - Can I take your order? - Already ordered.
This is table eight, Joey.
I said table five.
Okay.
Miss, that coffee please? All right, in a second.
Just a second.
Hey, Jo.
Thanks, Satan, for completing this night by sending one of your disciples to finish me.
- What are you doing tonight? - Excuse me, I didn't order this.
Forget I said that.
I was out looking for a date and since I couldn't find one, I thought of you.
So how's about it? You wanna crash a party with me? You know, as much as that sounds like so much fun, I'm kind of busy.
- Come on, Jo, it'll be fun.
- Yeah.
After I serve the 1 00 millionth seafood platter pick the glass out of the ice machine scrape the mung out of the fry-o-laters I was gonna take my tip money fly to the Canary Islands and open an offshore account.
What do you think of that? Sorry.
You know, when's the last? Okay, all right, all right.
Wait, Joey, when's the last time you went out and had some fun? Don't ask.
Besides, Dawson's gonna be there.
- Big whoop.
- Alone, Joey.
Go.
But it's swamped.
Sara's coming in to cover.
She can't handle this alone - Goodbye.
- Thank you.
Come on, come on, come on.
Party on, Bessie.
- Dawson? - Yeah? Hey.
Hey.
How's it going? - Complicated.
You? - Complicated.
Squarely in the midst of what Dr.
Keenan would refer to as Stage 4.
Stage 4.
Dare I ask what Stage 5 is? Anyway, on to you.
Where's Billy the Kid? Probably out with his ex-girlfriend, who is my current girlfriend which means that I'll be attending tonight's barbecue solo while Jen spends the afternoon with my new roommate.
I wonder what stage Dr.
Keenan would put us in.
- High school.
- Let's face it, Dad.
We're a couple of nice guys which stopped being a desirable trait about half a century ago.
I am the last person who should give you or anyone else romance tips.
However, it seems every relationship produces its share of disappointment and insecurity and pain.
Anyone who's never been hurt is either very lucky or very Ionely.
The trick is to get through it.
- How? - Compromise.
Tears.
Scuba lessons at the local Y.
- Different for everyone.
- And that works? I have no idea, kid.
No idea whatsoever.
Do you know how much I just wanna scoop you up and take you to New York? And I would just end up turning around and coming here.
- This is my home, Billy.
- So this is really it? You are leaving me for a guy who's got an E.
T.
doll on his bed.
- It's a collector's item.
- It is a doll.
Look, Billy, it's been good to see you again but I should go to that party and find Dawson since I owe him about 400 explanations.
All right then, before you leave since who knows when and if we'll ever see each other again how about for old time's sake, you and me just one last kiss? One last kiss and then you'll go? Scout's honor.
Goodbye, Billy.
What'd I tell you? Is this a great party or what? Oh, yeah.
Time of my life.
I'm ready for the group hug whenever you are.
Melissa Fife at 1:00.
That's the girl of my dreams right there.
How do I look? Like a before picture in an ad for geek remover.
Easy, doll.
Jealousy's not gonna get you anywhere.
- Great party, huh? - Yeah, the time of my life.
I've had a rocking time since I joined the JV football team.
Yeah, and cheerleading has opened up so many doors.
What do you say, one drink and we hit the video store? - Thought you'd never ask.
- Be right back.
Okay.
Hi.
- Hey, you're here.
- Yeah, I'm here, I'm alone and I'm sorry about everything, Dawson about the way that I treated you.
I mean, I was foolish, and it was stupid of me to think that Come on, let's go talk.
- Drink? - No, thanks.
Really, I got an extra, so it's My friend's getting one, so I'm fine, thanks.
Really? Who's your friend? Dawson Leery.
You probably don't know him.
Sure, Dawson.
Sophomore, currently hitting the beach with that cute, blond chick.
Drink? Yeah, sure.
You know what, Dawson, I'm sorry.
I know I could have handled things better but it's like Billy showed up and my judgment flew out the window.
- I cut class and - You're too hard on yourself.
I swear, she's too hard on herself.
Why is he here? I thought you told him to go? I did.
I swear to God.
Yes, but I took the liberty of reading between the lines.
What are you talking about? Let's just say, as a student of the goodbye kiss it possessed a little more kiss and a little less goodbye.
- You kissed him? - It was a goodbye kiss, Dawson.
It was a goodbye kiss.
If that's all it was, then I will take my leave right now, but you tell me tell me all that kiss said was goodbye.
Excuse me.
All right, not that I care but you might want to pace yourself with this stuff.
Pacey, I know I don't say it enough, but you're a really terrific friend.
Okay, thanks, yeah.
Is this guy bothering you, Chloe? Okay, just a couple of things.
First, her name's not Chloe, it's Joey.
And second, no, I'm not hitting on her.
I'm just her friend, God knows.
Well, thanks for the info.
We'll catch you later.
Come on, let's take a little walk.
Bye.
Jen, tell him that kiss meant nothing.
Dawson, you've gotta understand.
I mean, this is such a confusing situation Then what? Your world is so completely upside down that you can't answer a question? I think she did answer the question.
You happen not to like the answer.
Stay out of this, okay? This doesn't concern you.
I think that's where we disagree, Dawson because not only does this concern me, it concerns me gravely.
So if there was ever a third and expendable wheel, it would be you.
See, Jen and I go way back.
She was with me long before she ever even entered into your fantasies.
You and everyone else.
You know, Dawson, I may have made some mistakes but at least I don't live in a fantasy world I'm sorry.
I don't want to trade insults.
I just want to know where I stand.
One of us has got to go.
Who's it going to be? Him or me? Jen, who's the third wheel in this scenario? You know, I think I am.
- Jen? - Jen? You happy now? Actually, not too bad.
You? - Are you trying? - Come on.
- Come on.
- Are we dancing? We're doing whatever you want to do, sweetheart.
All right, Jo, say goodbye to the nice serial rapist man.
You again, a-hole? - She doesn't want to leave.
- I don't want to leave, Pacey.
All right, Come on, cowboy, party's over.
God.
You all right? Jo? Dawson.
Thank you.
You're my hero.
This is probably not one of the brightest things you've done.
Shut up.
If Bodie sees her like this, she's dead.
I know.
You two stay here.
I'll go ahead.
Can you handle lush-life by yourself? Whatever you do, don't wake up the baby.
Okay, okay.
- All right.
Okay, we're gonna walk.
- Okay.
Hey.
Hey, little man.
Why don't you just play like you're drunk Aunt Joey and go back to sleep? There you go.
There you go.
Get your feet up.
Joey I know it's been a tough week for you.
And you always try to handle everything by yourself.
Is that why you got drunk tonight, Jo? You just needed a little break from life? Tartar sauce.
Tartar sauce, table five.
Table five.
Come on, little guy.
Come on.
You want that? Right in there, come on.
Oh, God, there's gotta be something to quiet this kid down.
It's probably the wrong time to tell you this, but Well, maybe it's the perfect time.
I realize how incredibly confusing things are between us right now.
I can't even begin to explain our relationship.
You probably can't either.
But I just want you to know that if you ever need me I'll always be here for you.
All you ever have to do is ask.
So the guy who ends up being the English patient and that girl they're stranded in the cave, and she looks up at him.
She's like: "Oh, no, please don't leave me.
Promise me you'll come back someday.
" And he turns around Hey, listen to this.
He turns around.
He's like: "Don't worry, darling, I'll come back for you unless my plane is shot down by Nazis and my face is burned beyond recognition after cutting off Willem Dafoe's fingers.
" Okay, it's cool.
Let's go.
All right.
Sleep tight, little man.
I guess scuba diving wasn't such an inspired idea after all.
Yeah, well, I don't think that scuba diving water skiing or bungee jumping is the key to solving our problems.
- I know.
I just thought if maybe we tried something new I'm not sure that it's the new stuff that needs the work.
Maybe we've neglected some of the old things? Gale, I love you.
And I am willing to do whatever I have to.
So why don't we just start with something really simple, okay? Something that doesn't require regulators or parachutes or oxygen tanks.
Okay.
Like what? May I? One thing at a time, Gale.
Dude, Joey was so out of it tonight.
She babbled on about the Ice House kissed me, rolled over and passed out - Wait, wait, she kissed you? - Yeah.
She kissed you like an aunt-on-Thanksgiving kiss or she kissed you? - She kissed me.
I mean, it meant nothing.
She was completely wasted, obviously mistook me for Brad Pitt.
Dawson, my fine, oblivious friend.
One of these days, you'll have to take a gigantic fact-check, all right? She didn't mistake you for anybody, okay? This girl is head-in-the-clouds one hundred percent, ass-backwards in love with you, all right? Dude, Pacey Joey and I have a great time together.
It's great to have somebody that you know so well that you don't have to verbalize what you're thinking most of the time.
The other person just gets it, picks up on it.
And it's like that with Joey and me.
It's great, and I like it, but it's I mean, it's not love.
All right, don't you think it's a little strange that in the middle of a disastrous weekend with Jen you and I are talking about your friend Joey? Love is what I have with Jen, okay? It's exciting.
It's new and unknown.
Yeah, I mean, sometimes it's out of hand but there's a difference between friendship and love.
Right, and you're so sure that you know that difference? You don't know what you're talking about.
Leaving so soon? Yeah.
I thought I'd check out the scenery up the coast.
My travel agent says it's spectacular this time of year.
I assume you haven't tried to steal anything other than my girlfriend? Hey, relax, all right? You win.
I just talked to Jen, and apparently she's not as confused as she seems.
So it looks like the nice guy is gonna get the girl after all.
Oh, by the way, if traffic's with me I can make it up here from New York in under three and a half hours.
You better treat her good, Dawson.
I will.
You know, for someone who views himself as a tragically nice guy I spend an awful lot of time apologizing.
I'm sorry about what I said.
Insecurity brings out the worst You You know how you're curious about what my life was like in New York? Truth is, it's really no different than it is right now.
I mean, geography aside, I am still the same stupid girl who's always found it easier to escape into a relationship than to face life on her own.
- That's not true.
It's this whole Billy thing.
Now that the Ghost of Boyfriends Past is gone we can go back.
- To what? Dawson, I I'm 1 6, I've never stayed home on a Saturday night I've never gone stag to a school dance.
I mean, I'm pretty, I'm lucky I'm fortunate and And I am still way too unhappy most of the time.
I told Billy today that it was over with us.
I know, he told me.
And now I have to say the same thing to you.
What? You know what, I know I criticize you for living in a fantasy world, Dawson but the truth is I envy you.
Everything is so new, so untouched for you.
I would gladly trade in all my experience for just an ounce of your idealism.
And I wish I knew some better way to say this We can make this work.
We can fix this.
I know we can.
- No, it's over.
It's over.
- Jen, you're upset.
Sleep on it, we'll talk tomorrow.
- We don't need to go over this now.
- Dawson, please, listen to me.
I gotta take a few steps back.
I've got to try life on my own for a while.
You can't just make me fall for you and then bail as soon as it I'll miss you, you know.
Yeah.
I'll be sleeping and it'll feel like a thousand miles.
I'll regret my decision constantly.
I'll kick myself to no end And when I come crawling back to you, you'll have every right to say: "Take a hike, Jen.
I'm with somebody else, and I don't" Somebody who appreciates me.
Somebody who doesn't blow into town and play mind games with the boy next door.
Somebody who is capable of a healthy, committed relationship.
And unfortunately, somebody nothing like you.
SubRip by Szabby (szabby@freemail.
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