Degrassi The Next Generation (2001) s11e06 Episode Script

Cry Me a River: Part 1

This is Degrassi radio coming at you from the caf.
Now, I know I don't need to remind you that we are in the final stages of choosing a flying new DJ to *** So listen up see to who will be the new voice of Degrassi.
But enough from me, let's go back to the tunes.
Has Sav heard your demo? Oh it's only a matter of time til I have my own show.
Don't worry, I won't let that the fame gets me, much.
I can't wait.
Go ask! Ask? Okay, here goes nothing! Hey, DJ Dave, reporting for duty! Dave, you here for the radio too? Yeah.
What do you do? You, uh, you work the tech stuff, right? You work the knobs? Uh, actually, I'm here for the on-air gig.
"The man show" with Adam Torres.
You're doing a "man" show? Yeah.
You? Uh, "Dave Turner's man hour".
Kinda the same, huh? Yeah, you guys are making my life really difficult.
You each submitted a great demo.
Yeah, for practically the same show.
So who, uh, who gets the job? Well, actually, I'm gonna let the school decide.
You two will Duke it out on-air.
What, like a competition? Sav: Exactly! You two will test for the new Degrassi radio show, "mano a mano.
" All right, well May the best man win.
Whatever it takes I know I can make it through and if I hold out I know I can make it through ♪ be the best ♪ ♪ the best that I can be ♪ whatever it takes I know I can make it I can make it I can make it through ooh I can make it through I can make it through I can make it whatever it takes I know I can make it through Well, class, we have a late addition.
Welcome to grade 11 drama, miss Coyne.
Aren't you in grade 12? I'm short an arts credit.
Okay, so we've got some exciting news! Because so many strong drama students have chosen to grace this class, we are responsible for mounting the school play! What kind of play exactly? That's the class's first assignment, Mr.
Goldsworthy; to figure out what play we wanna do.
So, I want you to break into groups offour and let the brainstorming begin! Hey, do you have room for one more? We already have four.
I rhymed, so it must be true! Fiona, I know this must be hard.
I'll just brainstorm on my own.
They're probably just intimidated, your brother won the grundy.
Don't worry, you'll find your place soon enough.
May I go to the girls room? Yep.
There are dozens of clubs still looking for members.
Stop by the display to join one today.
Clubs are back! Finally, this is a high school again, and not a prison camp.
Question is, which club to join? Not the usual? Drama, fiction Those are Elli zones.
He's on some kind of anti-anxiety meds, and I don't want to push his buttons.
Well, how about orienteering? Alli, for the millionth time, I'm not interested in Jake Martin.
Well, you did kiss him.
Once, by accident.
Besides, this semester is not about boys.
It's about me, and my heart is set on newspaper.
It'll be a great way to diversify.
My writing portfolio.
There's Katie Matlin, the editor.
I'm home from practice seven-ish.
Can we talk chemistry homework then? Ever heard of taking a break? Ever heard of not being a slacker? Love 'ya, babe! Katie? Hi, I'm Clare.
I'd like to join your writing staff.
Uh, you can't just join the newspaper, you need to be selected.
Okay, what do I do? Write a sample article.
A concise hundred words by the end of day.
No adjectives, no adverbs.
What should the article be about? How about Ten ways to get over a break-up.
Can you handle that? I'm living it.
Yes, yes.
Who looks good in these things? Uh, you? I know.
I can't believe grad photo day is here! One of the last stops on the way.
To the rest of my life.
Well, don't be in too much of a hurry to ditch me, okay? I'm gonna be all by myself next year! Who will proofread my essays? Who will I gossip with me in between classes? Speaking of class, shouldn't you be in drama? Yeah, but we got out early.
Okay, I got out early.
But it was filled with grade elevens Unfriendly, rhyming ones.
Once they see what a drama queen you are, they'll love you! Holly J, you know I have trouble making friends.
Even you I inherited from Declan.
What about Charlie? Weren't you guys on the friend path? Yeah, but we haven't spent much time together.
Since spring break.
You can't make friends with someone.
Unless you spend time with them! Yeah You know, Holly J, you might be right.
So we're supposed to like, joust on air, to see who wins.
You're funny and adorable; You've so got this! I need this.
Plus, I mean, I can't lose to Adam, of all people.
What do you mean, "of all people"? Well, how's he supposed to host a man show? Because he's transgendered? Well, how's he supposed to Hosyeah, it's weird.
Adam's nice.
You think everyone's nice.
What? My locker's near Adam's, and I hear him talking to his friends sometimes.
He's pretty funny.
Okay, so I'll pull out the "A" game, and I'll prove that I'm better, funnier, and manlier.
How hard can it be? Surprise! Fiona? What are you doing here? We just haven't hung out in so long, I thought we could have some lunch.
I brought a picnic, including homemade applie pie.
You baked a pie? Well, someone did.
So Do you wanna spend some time with me? I'd love to, but I can't leave the store.
Oh, of course, work.
God, I'm so stupid.
But we can have it here.
See ya, Charlie.
See anything you like? Oh! I'm still desperate to make that shiny black Stella mine.
Are you sure you can't get me a discount? You do kinda owe me.
Uh, Elise, this is my friend, Fiona.
From spring break.
Oh, right.
I heard Charlie got you hooked on scooters too.
Oh yeah, I'm still trying to get the hang of it.
Fiona brought a picnic lunch.
Um There's enough for three.
You're welcome to join us.
Are you sure? I-I was just leaving.
Of course! The more, the merrier.
Well? Uh Well, it's the most well written, and detailed article on surviving a break-up, that I've ever read.
But? Don't you think it's a little long? I wanna stand out! Katie only asked for a hundred words.
Anyone can do that.
Katie will be impressed that I went above and beyond.
If you say so I know so! Well, you get an "A" for effort.
Okay, before we get started, do I need to remind you two how nervous Simpson is.
About handing the airwaves over to students? - Nope.
- Got it.
Keep it clean, keep it fun, let me know when you're ready.
Oh, I was born ready.
Oh, is that how you were born? How were you born? Short? Mmm, it's like that.
You want me to take the gloves off? Go ahead, Dave! Show me what you're packing.
That's my attack dog.
I trained him to crave weakling.
Yo, I will dog whisper your butt.
I will own you! You can't own me, Holmes, I got the mind of a ninja, the eye of the tiger, the courage of a lion! The brain of a scarecrow, and the heart of a tin man.
Boom! Oh, you did not just "boom" me! Oh, I boomed you, Dorothy.
I boomed you big time, and I'll do it again! Oh no, you- Boom! All right, well, look, we'll see how funny you are when we're on the air.
Are we ready? Let's do this.
It's being done, my friend.
We're on air? And the people have spoken.
Boom! "Mano a mano" with Dave and Adam! This is gonna be awesome! Look, I gotta say I wanted to beat you, but it'll be way more fun to join you.
We rule! I'll be out in a sec.
Ah, youcame in.
You gotta whiz too? No, just, uh wanna wash my hands.
So, what are we going to talk about tomorrow? Uh Girls? Music? Whatever we want.
Or we could, uh, push the envelope, take on some issues, see how far we can go until Simpson reams out Sav.
Adam? What? Oh! Um Yeah, Simpson.
Dude, you've got issues! No, Dave, I wasn't staring! Look, whatever.
I've got class.
El presidente, you got a minute? Dave! Yeah.
Anything for my new shock jock! Where's your other half? You mean Adam? Yeah.
You two are all the buzz.
Dude, check this out.
New t-shirt prototype.
Made it myself.
Yeah, look, it-it's great and I had fun and everything, but I gotta quit the show.
Um, you haven't even started yet.
And why? I can't really talk about it.
Look, me and Adam, we're just, we're not a good fit.
It's just a radio show, dude! You're not marrying anyone.
Besides, people love you two together! Your first broadcast got a hundred emails.
A hundred?! I'm saying, give it a week, you two are gonna be the most popular guys at this school.
You wanna give that up? Son! Your show was hilarious! Yeah? You heard? You da man! You're gonna be back on again tomorrow, right? Yeah, yeah.
Can't wait to hear it.
Proud of you.
Twelve noon.
"Mano a mano" with Dave and Adam! Home safe and sound.
So your friend elise was so nice to me! Doesn't everyone love you at first sight? I wish! I'm not exactly fitting in at school.
It's high school; who does? Plus, you only have a few months left.
It's a long, boring story, but I'm short a few credits, so I'll be back next year, and the few friends that I do have will be heading to their ivory towers.
I'll be all alone.
Hey, you'll have me.
I should really go, before my boss notices I've been gone.
For an hour and a half! Are you sure you don't want me to drop you off at school? Very sure.
What about tonight? Any plans? Yeah.
Bowling night.
There's always room for one more.
Really? I love bowling.
I me, I assume I will.
You've never been? Well then, tonight's your lucky night! Fiona, what are you doing here? Mom, I thought you had a spa thing.
I cancelled.
Why aren't you at school? I should go.
That's an excellent idea.
My daughter and I need to talk.
Hi, Katie.
Clare, what do you have for me? One sample article, signed, sealed, and delivered.
W-well, not sealed, but the other two.
Uh, leave it on my desk.
So when do you think you'll get a chance to read my article? I have some time next Friday.
Next Friday?! I'm joking, Clare.
Unclench! People say I'm intense.
How about I read it now? Great! I said a hundred words.
I wanted to do more than a fluff piece.
This is five pages! You put in footnotes, and there's an appendix! Kids aren't going to read this.
Well, you don't know that.
You're telling me what I don't know? Maybe it just needs a catchy headline.
I'm sorry, Clare, the newspaper staff is full.
I guess Dave isn't coming.
I only went into the guy's bathroom, because I wanted him to see me as a guy.
Backfire much? Because you got caught sneaking a peek.
No! I-I told you, I wasn't sneaking a peek! I just wanted to check out his stance at the urinal.
Why the sudden interest in urinals? Because of this.
What the heck is that?! A stand-to-pee device.
I got it online.
It's so I can- stand to pee? How does it work? How do you think it works? Mayday, ten o'clock.
What do I say? Just be cool.
Act like it never happened.
No, but if-if Dave can't handle this, then who can? Give him some credit.
Hey, I thought you weren't coming.
Well, uh, we have a show to plan for, don't we? Well, good luck.
Well, we should get started.
Uh Mom, will you let me explain? Why you skipped school? It was a really hard day for me.
So you decided to leave.
And you decided to embarrass me.
In front of Charlie! That is not what we're discussing right now! Fine, I get it.
You're mad.
This is what mad looks like! But underneath the mad is a lot of worry, Fiona! You've already lost one semester! You can't afford to lose another.
But I don't need school.
I could get a job! You're seventeen.
Your job is to go to school.
But what if I hate it - a lot?! If that's truly how you feel, we'll go back to New York.
What? No! The only reason why we're here because you promised Degrassi would be good for you.
Ause you promised.
Okay, fine, I'll go to school.
I promise, no more skipping.
Good! Otherwise, you're on the next plane to La Guardia.
So, basically, you blew it.
Katie didn't even read my article.
Well, maybe she'll give you a second chance? There she is, I should go talk to her.
Now let's see your best "I'm sorry" face.
That'll do.
Now, I'll be over there getting my latte on.
Katie, can we talk for a second? I have soccer practice.
See you later, Mare.
Marisol, can you please tell your friend I'm sorry? It's, uh, gonna take more than that.
See, Katie goes out of her way to avoid drama, and youare drama.
I am not drama! These friends of mine they try, they try we all struggle, we all strive So we should come up with some bits.
We can use over and over.
Yeah, like uh Joke of the day.
Yeah, or stump the dork.
People can send you their trivia questions.
Excuse me? I'm the dork? We don't have to call it that.
Um, anyway, how about we do this? We can do a quiz, like Here, hand me your pen.
What is your problem? No problem.
Was it something I did? I mean, ever since you ran out of the bathroom Look, Adam, it's not you, it's not the bathroom.
We're good.
I, uh, just had too much caffeine.
Well, we should probably get back to work.
I, uh, have to Just give me a minute.
Bathroom brainstorm, I have another idea.
And it couldn't wait? Well, I gotta go too.
So on "Jesse and Gene," they used to write new lyrics to old songs.
I mean, they were no weird Al, but it was pretty good.
What-what are you doing? Just going to the bathroom.
So this one time, Gene sang like this dying old guy, and instead of "Cry Me a River," it was "Buy Me a Liver.
" What-what is that? Nobody said you have to stare! Oh! Ah! Dude! My shoes! I'm sorry, I'm still trying to figure out how to work this thing.
Oh, gross! Oh! This- look, this is too much! Dave, come on.
I'm sorry! Look, just stay away from me, okay? Hey Charlie, it's me.
I hope you got my messages from last night.
I hope you're not mad.
The car's downstairs! Gotta go to school.
But please call me back.
Don't obsess, she'll call.
Everything is gonna change Everything is wrong wrong people are being loved wrong ones dying Hey, is Dave almost here? Umyeah, any-any minute now.
I can't wait to hear you guys top yesterday's show.
For sure, it'll be sick.
Hey, I'm-I'm still really sorry about yesterday.
Yeah, let's just do the show.
Yeah, we're both men.
Who needs to talk, right? Maybe that can be the topic.
Hey Degrassi, welcome to "Mano a Mano" with Dave and Adam! Let me tell you, it does not smell good in the booth today, so lay off the burritos out there! What I want to talk about today is bathroom rules.
Now, not to get all politically incorrect, but should girls be allowed to use the guys' bathroom at school? Dave, seriously, watch it! Because how I see it is, I mean you're in there doing your thing, and all of a sudden, there's a tranny staring at your junk! Dave! Why is this cool? That's it, I'm cutting you off.
Text me.
Let me know what you think.
Not cool, Dave.