Doctor Who s01e04 Episode Script

Aliens of London

There's a strange man in my bedroom.
No.
- Mum? - I'm in town.
Look, just go home! Just go home right now.
Darling, you're breaking up.
- Mum? Right, then! I'll be off.
Unless I don't know.
You could come with me.
- Is it always this dangerous? - Yeah.
How long have I been gone? About 12 hours.
Oh! Right, I won't be long.
I just want to see my mum.
- What're you gonna tell her? - I don't know.
I've been to the year five billion and only been gone, what, 12 hours? No, I'll just tell her I spent the night at Sharine's.
See you later.
Oh! Don't you disappear.
I'm back! Sharine, she's all upset again.
Are you in? So, what's been going on? How've you been? What? What's that face for? It's not the first time I stayed out all night.
It's you.
Course it's me.
Oh, my God, it's you.
Oh, my God.
It's not 12 hours, it's 12 months.
You've been gone a whole year.
Sorry! The hours [sat here, days and weeks and months.
All on my own! I thought you were dead.
And where were you? Travelling! What the hell does that mean, travelling? That's no sort of answer! You ask her, she won't tell me.
That's all she says, "travelling".
- That's what I was doing.
- Well, your passport's still in the drawer.
It's just one lie after another! I meant to phone, I really did.
I just I forgot.
What, for a year? You forgot for a year? And I'm left sitting here? I just don't believe you! Why won't you tell me where you've been? Actually, it's my fault.
I sort of employed Rose as my companion.
When you say companion, is this a sexual relationship? 'No! 'No! Then what is it? Because you, you waltz in here, all charm and smiles, and the next thing I know, she vanishes off the face of the Earth! How old are you, then, 40, 45? What, did you find her on the Internet? Did you go online and pretend you're a doctor? - I am a doctor.
- Prove it.
Stitch this, mate.
Did you think about me at all? I did, all the time, but One phone call.
Just to know that you were alive.
I'm sorry, I really am.
But do you know what terrifies me is that you still can't say.
What happened to you, Rose? What can be so bad that you can't tell me, sweetheart? Where were you? I can't tell her.
I can't even begin.
She's never gonna forgive me.
And I missed a year.
Was it good? - Middling.
- You're so useless.
Well, if it's this much trouble, are you gonna stay here now? I don't know.
Can't do that to her again, though.
Well, she's not coming with us.
- No chance! - I don't do families.
She slapped you! been slapped by someone's mother.
Your face.
- It hurt! - You're so gay! When you say 900 years That's my age.
- You're 900 years old.
- Yeah.
- My mum was right.
- That is one hell of an age gap.
Ugh! Every conversation with you just goes mental.
There's no one else I can talk to.
I've seen all that stuff up there, the size of it, and I can't say a word.
Aliens and spaceships and things, and I'm the only person on planet Earth who knows they exist.
Oh, that's just not fair.
All right, all right! Keep your hair on! It's not my fault, is it? I can't move anywhere! Ah, just my luck.
Stay back, please.
Back, thank you.
It's blocked off.
We're miles from the centre.
The city must be gridlocked.
The whole of London must be closing down.
I know, I can't believe I'm here to see this.
This is fantastic.
- Did you know this was going to happen? - Nope! - Do you recognise the ship? - Nope! - Do you know why it crashed? - Nope! Oh, I'm so glad I got you.
I bet you are.
This is what I travel for, Rose, to see history happening right in front of us.
Well, let's go and see it.
Never mind the traffic.
We've got the Tardis.
Hmm, better not.
They've already got one spaceship in the middle of London.
And I don't wanna shove another one on top.
Yeah, but yours looks like a big, blue box.
No one's gonna notice.
You'd be surprised, an emergency like this.
There'll be all kinds of people watching.
Trust me, the Tardis stays where it is.
So history's happening, and we're stuck here? Yes, we are.
We could do what everybody else does.
We could watch it on TV.
Big Ben destroyed as a UFO crash-lands in central London.
Police reinforcements are drafted in from across the country to control widespread panic; looting and civil disturbance.
A state of national emergency has been declared.
Tom Hitchingson is at the scene.
The police urge the public not to panic.
Here's the helpline number on screen right now, if you're worried about friends or family.
The military are on the lookout for more spaces/ups.
Until then, all flights in North American airspace have been grounded.
The Army are sending divers into the wreck of the spaceship.
No one knows what they're going to find.
The President will address the nation [I've from the White House, but the Secretary General has asked that people watch the skies.
- I've got no choice.
- You've broken your mother's heart.
- Either I make him welcome - She's sobbing in my arms.
- or I risk never seeing you again.
- I cradled her like a child! Oi! I'm trying to listen! News is just coming in.
And we can go to Tom at the Embankment.
They've found a body.
It's unconfirmed, but I'm being told that a body has been found in the wreckage, a body of non-terrestrial origins.
It's being brought ashore.
A body of some sort has been found inside the wreckage of a spacecraft.
Guess who asked me out? Billy Croot! Unconfirmed reports say the body is of extra-terrestrial origin.
An extraordinary event unfolding here live in Central London.
The body is being transferred to a secure unit mortuary.
The whereabouts as yet unknown.
The roads in Central And when you stuff your fins on, you can cover the whole lot with butter cream.
Oh, look at that! Then ice it any colour you want.
And here's one I made a little bit earlier.
Ana' look at that! Your very own spaceship, ready to eat.
And for something a little extra special Albion Hospital.
We still don't know if it's alive or dead'.
Whitehall is denying everything.
But the body has been brought here.
Albion Hospital.
With the roads closed off, it's the closest to the river.
Go on.
I'm being told that's General Asquith now entering the hospital.
The building's evacuated patients moved out onto the streets.
The police still won't confirm the presence of an alien body contained inside those walls.
Let's have a look, then.
Good God! And that's real? It's not a hoax or a dummy, or I've x-rayed the skull.
It's wired up inside like nothing I've ever seen before.
No one could make this up.
We've got experts being flown in.
Until they arrive, get that out of sight.
Excuse me, sir.
I know it's a state of emergency and there's a lot of rumour flying around, but is it true what they're saying? About the Prime Minister? Mystery still surrounds the whereabouts of the Prime Minister.
He's not been seen since the emergency began.
The opposition are critic/sing his lack of leadership Hold on.
Oh, that's Joseph Green, MP for Hartley Dale.
He's chairman of the parliamentary commission on the monitoring of sugar standards in exported confectionery.
With respect, hardly the most important person right now.
Indra Ganesh, sir.
Junior secretary with the MOD.
I'll be your liaison.
Where the hell is he? If we could talk in private, sir? Follow me upstairs.
Excuse me.
Harriet Jones.
MP for Flydale North.
I'm sorry.
Can it wait? But I did have an appointment at 3:15.
Yes, and then a spaceship crashed in the middle of London.
Think the schedule might've changed.
You've heard about the alien body, sir? Never mind that.
Where is he? Where's the Prime Minister? No one knows, sir.
He's disappeared.
I have to inform you that with the city gridlocked and the cabinet stranded outside London, that makes you acting Prime Minister with immediate effect.
Oh, Lord! Oh, hold on.
Pardon me.
It's a nervous stomach.
Anyway- Margaret Blaine, she's with MI5.
There's no more information, sir.
I personally escorted the Prime Minister from the cabinet room to his car.
This is Oliver Charles, transport liaison.
The car's disappeared.
There's no record of it, sir.
It literally vanished.
Right.
Inside.
Tell me everything.
Er, sir? The emergency protocols, detailing the actions to be taken by the government of Great Britain in the event of an alien incursion.
Right.
Good! Blimey! Pardon me.
Let's work, eh? And where do you think you're going? Nowhere.
It's just a bit human in there for me.
History just happened, and they're talking about where they can buy dodgy top-up cards for half price.
I'm off on a wander, that's all.
Right.
There's a spaceship on the Thames, and you're just wandering.
Nothing to do with me.
It's not an invasion.
That was a genuine crash-landing.
Angle of descent, colour of smoke, everything.
It was perfect.
- So? - So, maybe this is it! First contact.
The day mankind officially comes into contact with an alien race.
I'm not interfering, 'cause you gotta handle this on your own.
That's when the human race finally grows up.
Just this morning you were tiny and small and made of clay.
Now you can expand! You don't need me.
Go and celebrate history.
Spend some time with your mum.
Promise you won't disappear? Tell you what.
Tardis key.
About time you had one.
See you later.
Oi, gorgeous, come back and join the party! Oh, my God! Oi! Doctor! Doctor! I bet no one's brought you a coffee.
- Thank you.
- Pleasure.
You still can't go in.
Damn, you've seen through my cunning plan.
Hmm.
Look, I'm sorry, it's just impossible.
Not even for two minutes? I don't get many chances to walk these corridors, I'm hardly one of the Babes, just a faithful backbencher.
And I know we've had a brave new world land right on our doorstep, and that's wonderful.
I think that's probably wonderful.
Nevertheless, ordinary life keeps ticking away.
I need to enter this paper.
Oh! Mr Green, sir.
I know you're busy, but could you put this on the next cabinet agenda? - What is it? - Cottage hospitals.
I've worked out a system whereby cottage hospitals do not have to be excluded from Centres of Excellence.
You see, my mother's in the Flydale Infirmary, that's my constituency, tiny little place, you wouldn't know it.
But it's given me a chance to By all the saints, get some perspective, woman! I'm busy! Defence plan Delta! Come on, move! Move! It's alive.
Spread out, tell the perimeter it's a lockdown.
Oh, my God, it's still alive! Do it! Mick! Terry! Side rooms! Now! Clear! Room clear! - Keep it moving! - Clear! I swear, it was dead.
Coma, shock, hibernation, anything.
What does it look like? It's still here.
Hello.
Don't shoot! What did you do that for? It was scared! It was scared! I've got the White House phoning me direct because Downing Street won't answer their call! This is outrageous.
We haven't even started the vaccination program.
This is appalling.
The nations of the world are watching the United Kingdom.
Well, it has all been a bit of a shock.
This is the greatest crisis in modern history, and you've done nothing.
Your behaviour has been shameful, sir.
You're supposed to be in charge.
We need positive leadership.
The capital's ground to a halt.
All the more, we can only assume that the Prime Minister's disappearance is the direct result of hostile alien action.
And what've you been doing? Nothing! Sorry! Sorry.
Uh, I thought I was Prime Minister now.
Only by default! Oh! That's not fair! I've been having such fun.
You think this is fun? It's a hoot, this job.
Honestly, it's super! Oh! Excuse me! Oh! - What's going on here? And where's the rest of the cabinet? Why haven't they been airlifted in? I cancelled it.
They'd only get in the way.
Oops! There I go.
- Oh! I'm shaking my booty.
Under section five of the emergency protocols, it is my duty to relieve you of command.
And by God, I'll put this country under martial law if I have to.
- Oh! I'm scared! I mean, that's hair-raising.
I mean, literally.
Look! I just assumed that's what aliens looked like.
But you're saying it's an ordinary pig, from Earth.
More like a mermaid.
Victorian showmen used to draw the crowds by taking the skull of a cat, gluing it to a fish and calling it a mermaid.
Now someone's taken a pig, opened up its brain, stuck bits on, then they've strapped it in that ship, made it dive-bomb.
It must've been terrified.
They've taken this animal and turned it into a joke.
So it's a fake, a pretend, like the mermaid.
But the technology augmenting its brain, it's like nothing on Earth.
It's alien.
Aliens are faking aliens.
Why would they do that? Doctor? Doctor? Here's to the Martians! The Martians! I was gonna come and see you.
Someone owes Mickey an apology.
- I'm sorry.
- Not you.
Well, it's not my fault.
Be fair, what was I supposed to think? You disappear, who do they turn to? Your boyfriend.
Five times I was taken in for questioning.
Five times.
No evidence.
Of course! There couldn't be, could there? And then I get her, your mother, whispering around the estate, pointing her finger, stuff through my letter box, and all 'cause of you! Didn't think I'd be gone so long.
And I waited for you, Rose! Twelve months.
Waited for you and the Doctor to come back! Hold on! You knew about the Doctor? Why didn't you tell me? Yeah, yeah.
Why not, Rose? Huh? How could I tell her where you went? - Tell me now.
- I might as well, 'cause you're stuck here.
The Doctor's gone! Just now, that box thing just faded away.
- What do you mean? - He's left you! Some boyfriend he turned out to be.
He wouldn't just go.
He promised me.
Oh, he's dumped you, Rose! Sailed off into space.
How does it feel, huh? Now, you are left behind with the rest of us Earthlings.
- Get used to it.
- He would've said.
What are you two chimps going on about? What's going on? What's this Doctor done now? He's vamoosed.
He's not! 'Cause he gave me this.
He's not my boyfriend, Mickey.
He's better than that.
He's much more important.
And he What's that sound? Mum? Mum, go inside! Mum, don't stand there! Just go inside, just Mum! Oh, blimey.
Huh? How'd you do that, then? All right, so I lied.
I went and had a look.
But the whole crash landing's a fake.
I thought so.
just too perfect.
I mean, hitting Big Ben? Come on.
So I thought, "Let's go and have a look" - My mum's here.
Oh, that's just what I need.
Don't you dare make this place domestic! You ruined my life, Doctor.
They thought she was dead.
I was a murder suspect because of you.
See what I mean? Domestic! I bet you don't even remember my name! - Ricky.
- It's Mickey.
- No, it's Ricky.
- I think I know my own name.
You think you know your own name? How stupid are you? Mum, don't! Don't go anywhere! Don't start a fight.
Mum! It's not like that, he's not I'll I'll be up in a minute! Hold on! That was a real spaceship? - Yep! - So it was all a pack of lies.
What is it, then, that they're invading? Funny way to invade, putting the world on red alert.
Good point! So, what're they up to? As the crisis continues and the government shows a remarkable lack of leadership, paranoia sweeps the country.
There've been at least three reports of public assaults on people possibly identified as aliens.
Now back to Tom Hitchingson.
Are there more ships to come? And what is their intention? The authorities are now asking, if anyone knows anything, if any previous sighting has been made, then call this number.
We need your help.
Yes! I've seen one, I really have, an alien.
And she's with him.
My daughter, she's with him, and she's not safe.
Oh, my God, she's not safe.
I've seen an alien, and I know his name.
He's called the Doctor.
It's a box, a blue box.
She called it a Tardis.
So what you doing down there? - Ricky.
- Mickey.
Ricky.
If I was to tell you what I was doing to the controls of my frankly magnificent time ship, would you even begin to understand? - I suppose not - Well, shut it, then.
- Some friend you've got.
- He's winding you up.
I am sorry.
- Okay.
- I am, though.
Every day, I looked.
On every street corner, wherever I went, looking for a blue box for a whole year.
It's only been a few days for me.
I don't know.
It's hard to tell inside this thing.
But I swear, it's just a few days since I left you.
Not enough time to miss me, then.
I did miss you.
I missed you.
So, um, in 12 months Have you been seeing anyone else? Nope.
Okay.
Mainly 'cause everyone thinks I murdered you.
Right.
So, now that you've come back, are you gonna stay? Got it! Ha-ha! Patched in the radar, looped it back 12 hours, so it'll follow the flight of that spaceship.
Here we go.
Hold on.
Come on! That's the spaceship on its way to Earth.
See? Except Hold on.
See? The spaceship did a slingshot round the Earth before it landed.
- What does that mean? - Means it came from Earth in the first place.
It went up and came back down.
Whoever those aliens are, they haven't just arrived.
They've been here for a while.
Question is, what've they been doing? What do you think? How's the compression? I think I've got too much ballast round the middle.
Ooh, that's better! We've really got to fix the gas exchange.
It's getting ridiculous.
I don't know.
Seems very human to me.
Uh, better get rid of his skin! Shame, I quite enjoyed being Oliver.
He had a wife, a mistress and a young farmer.
God, I was busy.
Back to work! I have an army to command! Careful now.
We're not there yet.
General Asquith! Sir, we've had a priority alarm.
It's Code Nine, confirmed Code Nine.
Right.
Good.
Code Nine, huh? Which would mean? In the event of the emergency protocols being activated, we've got software which automatically searches all communications for keywords.
And one of those words is "Doctor".
I think we've found him, sir.
What sort of doctor? Who is he? Well, evidently, he's some sort of expert in extraterrestrial affairs.
The ultimate expert! And we need him, sir.
We need him here right now.
- How many channels you get? - All the basic packages.
- You get sports channels? - Yes, I get the football.
Hold on.
I know that lot.
But it's looking likely that the government's bringing in alien specialists, those people who've devoted their lives to studying outer space.
UNIT! United Nations Intelligence Taskforce.
Good people.
How do you know them? 'Cause he's worked for them.
Oh, yeah.
Don't think I sat on my backside for 12 months, Doctor.
I read up on you! You look deep enough on the Internet or in the history books, and there's his name.
Followed by a list of the dead.
That's nice.
Good boy, Ricky.
If you know them, why don't you go and help? They wouldn't recognise me.
I've changed a lot since the old days.
Besides, the world's on a knife edge.
There's aliens out there, and fake aliens wanna keep this alien out of the mix.
- I'm going undercover.
And, uh, better keep the Tardis out of sight.
Ricky! You've got a car.
You can do some driving.
Where to? The roads are clearing.
Let's go and have a look at that spaceship.
Do not move! Step away from the box! Raise your hands above your head! Rose! Rose! Rose! Take me to your leader! My daughter! This is a bit posh.
If I knew it was gonna be like this, being arrested, I would've done it years ago.
We're not being arrested, we're being escorted.
- Where to? - Where do you think? Downing Street.
- You're kidding! - I'm not! - 10 Downing Street? - That's the one! Oh, my God! I'm going to 10 Downing Street? - How come? - I hate to say it, but Mickey was right.
Over the years, I've visited this planet a lot of times, and I've been, uh, noticed.
Now they need you.
Like it said on the news, they're gathering experts in alien knowledge.
And who's the biggest expert of the lot? - Patrick Moore? - Apart from him.
Oh, don't you just love it.
Oh, I'm telling you, Lloyd George, oh, he used to drink me under the table.
Who's the Prime Minister now? How should I know? I missed a year.
Oh, my God! So she's all right, then? She's not in any trouble? All I can say is that your daughter and her companion might be in a position to help the country.
We'll need to know how she made contact with this man, if he is a man.
Ooh! Right, off you go, then.
I need to talk with Mrs Tyler on my own, thank you.
Harriet Jones, MP, Flydale North.
Ladies and gentlemen, can we convene? Quick as we can, please.
It's this way on the right, and can I remind you ID cards are to be worn at all times.
Here's your ID card.
I'm sorry.
Your companion doesn't have clearance.
I don't go anywhere without her.
You're the Code Nine, not her.
I'm sorry, Doctor.
It's, uh, Doctor, isn't it? - She'll have to stay outside.
- She's staying with me.
Look, even I don't have clearance to go in there.
I can't let her in and that's a fact.
That's all right.
You go.
Excuse me.
Are you the Doctor? - Sure? - Not now.
We're busy.
Can't you go home? I just need a word, in private! You haven't got clearance.
Now leave it! I'm gonna have to leave you with security.
It's all right, I'll look after her.
Let me be of some use.
Walk with me.
Just keep walking.
That's right, don't look round.
Harriet Jones.
MP, Flydale North.
This friend of yours, he's an expert, is that right? He knows about aliens? - Why do you wanna to know? Ladies and gentlemen, if I could have your attention, please.
As you can see from the summaries in front of you, the ship had one porcine pilot.
Of course, the really interesting bit happened three days ago, see? Filed away under any other business, the North Sea satellite detected a signal, a little blip of radiation at 100 fathoms.
Like there's something down there.
You were just about to investigate, and next thing you know, this happens.
Spaceships.
Pigs.
Massive diversion.
From what? They turn the body into a suit, a disguise for the thing inside! It's all right, I believe you.
It's It's alien.
They must have some serious technology behind this.
If we could find it, we could use it.
Ooh! Oh, my God.
Is that Harriet, for God's sake! This has gone beyond a joke.
You cannot just wander Oh, my God.
That's the Prime Minister.
If aliens fake an alien crash and an alien pilot, what do they get? Us.
They get us.
It's not a diversion, it's a trap.
Oh! Has someone been naughty? It was bigger on the inside.
I don't know.
What do I know about spaceships? That's what worries me.
You see, this man is classified as trouble, which means that anyone associated with him is trouble.
And that's my job.
Eliminating trouble.
But that's not possible.
He left this afternoon.
The Prime Minister left Downing Street.
He was driven away! And who told you that? Hmm? Me! This is all about us.
Alien experts.
The only people with the knowledge how to find them gathered together in one room.
Excuse me.
Do you mind not farting while I'm saving the world? Would you rather silent but deadly? Ah! We are the Slitheen.
Thank you all for wearing your ID cards.
They'll help to identify the bodies.
Yesterday saw the start of a brave new world.
Today might see it end.
Right! You want aliens, you've got them.
They're inside Downing Street.
Come on! Planet Earth is at war.
Everybody run! - Who exactly are the Slitheen? - They're aliens.
I could save the world but lose you.

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