Family Business (2019) s01e05 Episode Script

Pastraweed

Gérard's property used to be a kosher butcher shop, and all that's left now is a slaughtered shop.
What happened, Gérard? Well I got somewhat carried away.
And I tried to renovate it myself, but it got out of control.
What was your initial project? Well, the idea was to open a hookah bar, but a very upscale one.
A hookah-bar-butcher shop.
For instance, that's the old meat fridge.
I want to turn it into a smoking room, so the customer can get really wasted Rested.
Sorry.
It's time for my medicine.
Cut.
Talk to your friend.
After 20 takes, it still sucks.
Tell him.
- I'll handle it.
- Thanks.
- Gérard? - What? Can you focus? - You're killing us.
- Five minutes.
My head's like a couscous steamer.
I need a break.
- Just five.
- Okay.
Gaston, I'm only doing this for you.
Your friend is a pain in the ass.
Do you have some? - A cig? - No.
No, some weed.
No.
Hash? I thought maybe with the things - No! - Okay.
A NETFLIX ORIGINAL SERIES - Ali, what's up? - What's up? - Have a nice day.
Later.
- See you later.
Fuck, that stinks.
Your legs are longer than I thought.
I'll go higher.
- No.
- This thing sucks.
- What? - What's going on? Cops are all over, the weed smells, too.
We already know that.
Do something, then.
I can't do everything at once.
And can you close the door? The suit's too small, as usual.
I agree with Ali, it's too small.
I can't go to the Ministry with kiddy sleeves.
The smell will definitely give us away.
- I have an idea - Ludmila! You can't interrupt me all the time.
What's that dish that stinks like hell? The one with guts in it? - Kishke! - Right.
Can you make three or four pots to hide the smell? Pots to hide the smell.
Tomorrow I need everybody at the shop at 3 p.
m.
- Damidot wants interviews.
- I'm not going on TV.
I can make it.
Forget it.
Family only.
All right.
I can't make it tomorrow.
- I have a meeting with Aure - Wait.
What meeting? - We need - For business? In that case, Enrico and I need to know.
It's just paperwork, super boring.
And it's Enrico's contact who gave us the tip.
Thank God for Enrico.
- Right.
- Totally.
I have an idea for the smell.
I can spray some deadly farts.
Please, mind your suits instead of talking shit.
Ludmila! - I'm counting on you! - Yeah, right.
Gérard, what a shitty guy.
I don't even give a fuck about the interviews.
He talks to me like shit and no one says anything.
You're not a Hazan though.
I know, but I've been working my ass off for them and I get nothing.
- Ouch! It burns.
- Right, but you're moving.
- I'm moving - You are.
I'm upset.
Forget about it, you've got me.
- You're happy and satisfied.
- A "thank you" is all I ask for.
I don't know.
Just say the word, and the Hazans are finished.
- What do you mean? - The business.
Me and you, without them.
Wait a minute, that's not what They shun you.
I'd let you in my family in a heartbeat.
- Honey, that's really sweet - Wanna get married? What? You want a family, let's do it.
Excuse me.
It's only been three weeks.
Of course.
Let's not get married.
Sure.
Sorry, I just didn't expect that.
- No worries.
- I'm so sorry.
- No problem.
- I Zero problem.
It's working really good.
Nice work.
It stinks right up to the forest.
- How y'all doing? - Great.
You? - Good.
So, you're eating here.
- Yeah.
- It's delicious.
- It's good, right? Compliments to the chef! I'll go tell her.
- I'm going.
Okay, enjoy.
- Have a good one.
What the fuck? Grandma made her stinky kishke, and a lady cop came and loved it.
Now we're serving the entire unit.
Is there some "meluria" left? Mloukhiya.
Yes, I'll bring it to you.
No, wait.
Have you lost your minds? We couldn't ditch them without looking suspicious.
Thanks, it was delicious.
Now that's nice to hear.
- See you tonight, then.
- Right.
Cool.
Bye.
Why tonight? You're serving dinner, too? No, it's for target practice.
It's fun.
This is a mad house.
What's that? Seriously? What now? Hey, bro? What is this shit? A cow.
For cow dung.
But why? I'll make her shit to hide the smell.
Look at this beauty.
- Look.
Isn't it gorgeous? - It sure is.
Splendid.
I smell nothing.
Nothing.
- I smell nothing.
- What? Are you sure? It's all over your nose.
Fuck! I've got shit on my nose! I'll return it.
Do I still have shit? - Yeah.
- Shit! - Give it back, bro.
- Come on, Colette.
- You missed a spot.
- Here? - Yes.
- Fuck! Nice mustache.
It's all because of those vegan assholes, because Back in the day, if someone said they didn't eat meat, they wound up in a nuthouse.
Cut.
Gérard.
- What? - Please try.
You can't rant against everyone.
It's a family show.
The viewer should like you, relate to you.
I don't know.
Talk about stuff you like.
Your family.
What do you want me to say? This butcher shop is my entire life.
I met my wife here.
I was still an apprentice.
I proposed here.
I asked her father, Isidore.
I remember he I wasn't good enough.
Isidore told me He had a deep voice, he said: "You'll never have her as long as I live.
" May he rest in peace.
May he rest in peace.
And then Then we made our life here, with Béné.
Our children grew up here.
We were happy here.
And I know Béné's gone, but Here, I I see her everywhere.
Did you get want you wanted? You made me cry.
Happy? - No.
- It's over.
- Gérard.
- Right, Gérard.
That's not me.
You look great in it.
I'll give it to you.
I don't know.
Do you have anything else? What's the interview for? I told you.
It's this guy, a banker.
He owns a bank.
Not too far from here, actually, in the 9th arrondissement.
We met when When was that? When we were in college, with Joe Just like your brother.
We get a different answer each time.
Not at all.
We all have secrets.
I don't.
I say what I have to say.
"I say what I have to say.
" It's different for me, you know that.
What the? No way.
Are you kidding? No.
- You're pregnant? - Yes.
That's fucking insane! I'm gonna be an aunt.
Holy shit! Why didn't he tell me? What's wrong with him? Well, he actually He doesn't know.
He doesn't? No.
Why is that? Well You know your brother.
I can't picture a future with him.
He would be an amazing father.
You love each other.
Yes, sure.
But it's not the right time.
In any case, you keep this to yourself.
That's the hardest secret to keep.
All right.
It's your call.
Can't say I didn't notice your boobs getting huge, though.
- No! - Oh, shit! Shit's getting real.
It's time to talk to Aïda.
Why bring her up? Why stress me out? Everybody knows, but her.
She's my best friend, to whom I'm lying all day.
Let's wait for the law to pass, it's just a month.
- Hello, sir.
- Hello.
Aure and Joseph Hazan.
No, you're not on the list.
I'm sorry.
Can you step aside? - Wait a minute.
We don't need the list.
- Are you sure? We've been invited by VIPs.
You see? The minister's daughter.
Okay.
Calm down.
Your name isn't on the list.
So, please step aside, quietly.
What the fuck did she do? - Thanks a lot.
- Unbelievable.
She's an asshole.
Clémentine? It's Joseph.
What the hell? The Ministry didn't let us in.
We weren't on the list.
- Good for you, asshole! - What? What's your deal? What are you doing here? What about the Ministry? What's with the hair? It's not finished.
We were supposed to go, but your girl fucked up.
What a pain - Honey? - Fuck off! - What? - She's crazy.
Please, open the door? Happy now? You're reunited with your boyfriend.
You said the Hazans treated you like shit, that you couldn't stand that motherfucker.
Now you suck his dick like a bitch! - Got something to tell me? - I didn't say that.
But I think I know what's going on.
Listen, honey.
I'm not against us getting married, - but let's wait, make memories - Shut your mouth! - You're messing with my head.
- Wait.
I'm joining the conversation here.
I'll forget about "motherfucker," you didn't mean it.
Yes, I did.
Motherfucker! Okay, no big deal.
Listen.
Olivier's my brother.
I've known him forever.
And I swear I've never seen him like that with a girl.
I don't know what he told you, but he doesn't know his parents, he was abandoned as a child.
- Why are you telling her that? - It's okay.
Did you know that? No, I didn't.
That's why he's so vulnerable.
You have to take it easy.
It's like those wild horses known to be untamable.
If you stroke them, feed them a little hay, you can subdue them.
And then you can sell them at a very good price.
But you don't sell Olivier.
You keep him close.
And if you keep him close, you'll win the greatest races of your life.
I guarantee it.
I love you, bro.
Don't ruin what you have, okay? I think he really loves you.
Is that true? Do you? Yes, I love her.
Tell her, she can't hear you.
I love you.
You're on me.
I'm right behind you.
Don't worry about the meeting, I'll arrange it with my Dad.
I'm not totally crazy.
- Of course.
- Oops, I felt your cock.
Thanks, bro.
You're not holding it correctly.
Oh, shit! - The safety's not on.
- That was scary.
What are you doing here? Can't I hug my sister? - I'm busy.
- Wait.
What's going on with Joseph? He's my boyfriend, why? Why? - I'll kill that motherfucker.
- No, you won't.
I do what I want.
- Do you really know him? - Yes.
I know he's not a loser on welfare who sells pot and eats at his parents'.
He's a good guy.
Next time you go to his country house, go check the barn.
- See what he's up to.
- Why? - What? - You'll see.
- We'll see who the jerk is.
- Dick.
LEGALIZATION THE FRENCH SAY YES Shit.
That's good.
Youss, how are you? I called you three times, you little bitch.
And you're late.
Not by much.
But I'm glad you called, because I need a little extension.
You want more time? My sister's not enough? What are you talking about? Listen.
Don't try to fuck me over.
I know all of it.
Listen.
I'm sorry you You know what? I'm not sorry.
Okay? What's going on between Aïda and I is our business.
None of yours.
- Is it? - No.
We'll see when I put you in my trunk and throw you off a cliff, motherfucker.
I see you love your sister.
I can read that between the lines.
But I love her, too.
Really.
She's the one.
And don't worry about the money.
We're not screwing each other.
It'll be okay, I'm working on it.
Yeah, right.
Right.
Motherfucker.
Your Pastraweed is fabulous, Ludmila.
One drag, Dad.
Just one, and I'm so far gone.
It's so powerful.
Just you wait.
It's not totally dry yet.
That's only 50 percent of its potency.
If this works, you'll be able to spoil little JP.
- Gérard? - What? That's you in that painting.
Is it you? That's me, yeah.
My Béné Who's that? - I'll go check.
- Wait.
No, I'm the only one who's sober.
What are you doing? - Who is it? - Shush! Stop it.
I'm coming.
- Oh! - Hello.
It's the police.
- What? - Put it away! Fuck.
There you go.
How are you? So-so.
- Is there a problem? - Yes.
Shit.
I don't know what's going on, but we have a pipe problem.
That's not us.
We didn't do it.
Of course not.
The thing is that tonight is the precinct's 10th anniversary, and the place is flooded.
There's only one solution.
Foam party! For everyone! - No, not really.
- No? I was just wondering if we could use your barn.
No.
What? No.
- No? - No.
- What do you mean "no"? - Unfortunately.
The objects are all next to each other.
They're all together.
In the barn.
Too many things.
That's no problem.
I'll send 20 guys to move everything.
I see.
All right.
- Hi.
- Hi.
My sister.
You know each other? Yes.
We The barn is not a good idea, our mother didn't like to have She's dead.
Yes.
- Right.
- I'm so sorry.
She didn't like to let in non-kosher food.
- It's been like that - Forever.
- Yup.
It's Judaism - Jewish.
That's it.
I understand.
Totally.
Maybe it's not so bad.
Our food is soaked.
- Really? - And we love your food.
You could handle the catering.
We'll pay you, of course.
But - Well played.
- Great job.
In these conditions, it would almost seem suspicious to say no.
- We will say yes.
- Yes.
A big yes.
Awesome.
You're life savers.
So, 7 p.
m.
with the guys, does that work? No problem.
Eight or eight thirty works, too.
Seven's better, otherwise it'll be too late.
Okay.
Around seven, then.
- See you.
- Great.
Kisses.
Right, kisses.
- Bye.
- Ciao.
HAZAN MEATS KOSHER Come on, guys.
Let's put the bags here.
Here they are.
- What? - Be careful.
Fuck.
Listen.
Let me explain.
It's very simple.
Everything you see here is going to be legal.
It's true.
He speaks the truth for once.
- You dragged my brother into this.
- No, he We were waiting for the right moment to tell you.
It's a huge business with Enrico.
It's nothing shady, I promise.
You're all mental.
Aïda.
Aïda.
- Stop.
- Joseph.
- Shit.
Aïda! - Joseph! You'll deal with her later, Bubbeleh.
Come back here.
Fuck.
Are we good? There.
Let's hide the truck.
The Rungis Market would work.
Too risky.
Virgile's garage.
It's secure.
I have the code.
What if he finds out? We're screwed.
Impossible, he's on vacation with JP and Mélanie for a week.
Really? Perfect.
Give me the keys, bro.
I can't let you do this.
If you get caught, you'll get 15.
So what? I'll exercise and come back all hunky, I'll go to the beach What are you talking about? This is serious.
Stop.
You have no choice.
There's the police, your family.
Give me the keys.
Only I can do this.
You have no other option.
Here you go.
Be careful.
Don't worry about me.
- Okay? - Fuck.
Thanks, bro.
I'll follow you.
- They won't let you through the hood.
- You, too.
Thanks.
Be careful.
- Call me when it's done, okay? - All right.
"HONOR, HOMELAND, VALUES, DISCIPLINE.
" NATIONAL POLICE FORCE Excuse me, Mr.
Hazan.
We're running out of red wine.
Do you happen to have a couple of bottles? I'm on it.
Thank you.
My barn, my wine.
They're starting to piss me off.
What if one of your guys see us? They all know.
- Really? - Yeah.
If one has a problem with it, they can take it up with me.
Really? Holy shit.
Hey, Joe.
It's all good.
The truck's in.
Thank you, God.
Great.
So, you're coming back? No, I'm going to see Clém and her Dad with a bit of Pastraweed.
Then I'll relieve Ali and bring the truck first thing tomorrow.
You're awesome.
See you tomorrow.
Bye.
Are you all right? I'm just a bit shaken.
Hey, hey, hey.
There's something you didn't mention.
No.
Yes, there is.
What? What do you mean? I heard you play the guitar.
Your mother-in-law told us.
So? - He's a great player.
- No.
- It's been a long time.
- Don't be shy.
Come on! Come on, Gérard! Gérard! Gérard! Gérard! L'Chaim! L'Chaim! You like that word? Go home and say it there.
Jeez.
I'll let you clean up, I gotta see Aïda.
- Of course.
- Hold on.
What? Tonight was really close.
Yes.
They'll get us one day.
- I did a little thinking.
- Yeah? Enrico and I will find a new place to store the goods.
Great.
Can we talk about it tomorrow? - You have no idea.
- What? Enrico is a celebrity.
- If he's connected to all this - What an idiot! You still don't get it? Joseph sent you Enrico.
Do you have a few screws loose, Ludmila? Joseph? Aure? You've played me.
I'm sorry.
- You'd have never said yes.
- Indeed.
Don't take it this way.
Let's own up to it and move forward.
Own up to it? Do you own up to being a lesbian with your cop woman? - Excuse me? - What? See? You, too? - I don't see - You'd wanted to find out I don't care about the lesbian thing, that's not the problem.
A cop! A cop.
You're Are you stupid? - Excuse me? - You heard me.
You are just stupid.
How dare you talk to me like that? I'll say whatever I want.
Couldn't you fuck someone else? Are you lecturing me now? What about your shitty love life? Are you fucking kidding me? Go fuck yourselves, both of you! Assholes! What's wrong with you? He'd have found out anyway.
Now it's done.
Right.
Aïda, open the door.
I don't want to see you anymore.
Fuck off.
Open the door.
I told you to leave me alone.
Fuck.
Damn it.
Ali? Ali? Is that you, bro? Subtitle translation by Nadège Traoré-Dulot
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