Farscape s02e13 Episode Script

No! No! I will not be a slave to your hormones.
-Aeryn, no! Aeryn, wait! Two drops of this nectar and we can tell if our DNA's compatible.
Please? Tyno: You kissed our Princess.
What does that mean? I want you to consider marrying her.
(both yelling rapturously) You will rule not because you desire it, Clavor, but because I do.
Jena: If you're not going to be king, Clavor, I'm not going to marry you.
Zhaan: What is it, Pilot? The Builders.
Her creators.
After we're married, and I mean, right after we're married, they turn us into statues.
Oh, hello Crichton.
My daughter or that abomination.
Choose.
There's never been anything we couldn't overcome together.
Except each other.
Here's your wedding present from Prince Clavor.
(screaming) Jenavian Chatto, Disruptor, Peacekeeper Special Directorate.
So, what's your assignment? Stay close to Prince Clavor, my vapid little fiancee, and if he assumes the crown, kill him.
I sense unhappiness, that your friend Crichton is marrying our Princess.
Oh, yes? And why would that make me unhappy? Kahaynu: Moya can reproduce gunships.
Moya must be decommissioned.
She is killing herself because her deity commanded it.
A little reunion is in order, don't you think? Crichton: I've had three near death experiences in one day.
You can’t just quit.
I'm not quitting.
I just can't go on.
She is gone, and I am shortly to follow.
This is what our child would look like? One possibility.
The choice is ours.
I'm exploring the Barren Lands.
If you think you can keep up.
(chuckles) Do you accept this burden in matrimony? Without hesitation.
It's calibrated only for Sebaceans.
Endure the pain and rule wisely.
Woo! (screaming) Chiana: Tonight on Farscape.
D'Argo: They look so Chiana: Stiff.
Rygel: I think he should have taken his pose more seriously.
Tyno: I believe he did the best he could.
D'Argo: So, what happens now? For them, 80 cycles of government.
Boring, but ultimately advantageous.
And what do we do? Scorpius has been asked to leave our system within the solar day.
Once his Command Carrier vacates We hope that Moya returns and picks us up.
Chiana: You really going to stay, Ryg? Why not? Crichton will need advising and ah, the food's good.
So he can hear us? Every word.
The acoustics of this chamber funnel all sounds to them.
May we say goodbye? I'll wait outside.
John.
Hey, D'Argo.
You can hear us, but do you feel any pain? No, but I'd really love to pick my nose.
He remains without a sense of humor.
It's good to hear your voice, John.
Yours, too.
Hey, can I say hi to Chiana? Chiana.
You look great in bronze.
You look great in pink.
Brings out your eyes.
(laughs) Clavor: Frell! Frell! Frell! I'm gonna topple his statue! I should be regent! (metallic clank) (gasps) Cargn: While enormously symbolic, Your Highness, may I propose a more permanent tactic? What?! (growls) (gasps) Cargn: Are you sure he's still alive? Clavor: Of course.
Each cell is self-encapsulated.
As long as the parts stay in their metallised state, he can be reconstituted.
Cargn: Very impressive.
My great grandfather was broken in half when the senate collapsed after a groundshaker.
All he suffered was a severe limp.
(laughs) Foundry acid should ensure this ruler fares worse.
No, no, no, no, give it to me.
Give it to me.
I know you can hear me, Crichton, and I know you're scared.
Our laws state that a couple must rule together, hmm? That's why the crown must soon pass to me because you can't rule with one little head.
My name is John Crichton, an astronaut.
A radiation wave hit and I got shot through a wormhole.
Now I'm lost in some distant part of the universe on a ship, a living ship, full of strange alien life-forms.
Help me.
Listen, please.
Is there anybody out there who can hear me? I'm being hunted by an insane military commander.
I'm doing everything I can.
I'm just looking for a way home.
Aeryn: I propose that we start here and traverse around.
Excellent.
You always this agreeable? (chuckles) Am I being agreeable? Well, everything I've suggested, since the moment we met, you've consented to.
They've all been good ideas.
And your proficiency at this is? I've been rated expert.
Really? Mmm.
That's clearly a local custom.
What's this one called? "Kiss your climbing partner"? A different local custom.
"Kiss woman you're attracted to.
" Right.
You ready? Novia: Whoever perpetrated this atrocity shall pay in kind.
Beheaded! D'Argo: Surely you don't think -Silence! This planet is under stringent law until my daughter's husband is made whole.
No one is to leave or even contact their vessels, whether they purport to be a friend of the crown or not! Mm mm Where is the one called Aeryn Sun? The former Peacekeeper? Rygel: We don't know.
She was upset that Crichton was to marry the Princess.
I saw it with my own eyes.
You cannot possibly think -I can't possibly not! Find her.
Bring her to us for questioning.
If you want someone with a motive for stealing Crichton's head, try that vigilar Scorpius.
Everyone is suspect, especially off-worlders.
If Prince Clavor assumes the throne, I cannot guarantee your safety.
Find your friend's head.
Very fortunate I sampled your DNA when you were in the Aurora Chair.
There would have been no other way to track you, Crichton.
Though the crystalisation of your cells was designed to withstand corrosives, it seems three arns, well, a full-on acid attack is all it takes.
You're beginning to pit.
And while I won't be able to retrieve your body, I promise you, the wormhole calculations you have in your mind Who's there? Who's there? (grunts) (DRD whirring) You should use one of Moya's Transport Pods instead of that little one.
What do you care what I do? All life is precious.
Yours should continue.
And Moya's shouldn't? We have been through this.
Moya can produce gunship offspring.
We did not intend the universe to be subjected to that affliction.
I'm sorry.
I must leave now.
No! Kahaynu! If Moya's life is to end capriciously, and Pilot's also, you and I are going to remain with them.
Doubtful.
DRD, now! In reverse! Kahaynu: What? Stop this! Recommission Moya.
I cannot.
I will not.
Turn the engine off! I will spare you if you spare Moya.
Stop! I beg you! How does it feel for your prayers to go unanswered, Kahaynu? (Kahaynu screams) Dear goddess.
In my rage, what have I done? I cannot find Crichton's head anywhere.
I feel miserable.
Hey Aren't you tired? Just responsible.
I'm the one that talked him into it.
We had no other options.
You said that yourself.
We take what we get.
(loud screaming) My body! My body! I'm working on it.
Working on it? It's impossible.
Strangely not.
If I do this right, your current state is not terminal.
And if not done right? Terminal.
Get experts.
We're beyond that, don't you think? You're way too vulnerable in this state.
See exhibits "A" and "B.
" Have you got a plan? Revitalize you.
Your speech abilities are so limited right now, you couldn't convince the Empress you're a headless statue.
Whoa, nice dress.
-Save it.
When the Empress sees you, my trill fiance and his Scarran will be in deep dren.
Then you can be remade into a statue.
That's not much of a plan.
As long as the parts are aligned right (grunts in pain) the machine should do the rest.
Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, hey, hey, hey, wait, wait, wait, wait! Just a second! Hey, come back! (electronic whirring) (groaning) Can you turn your neck? (groaning) Can you speak? Thank you.
Can you walk? Uh uh (groans) (frustrated sigh) Cargn: I told you, it's best we're not seen together until after you're married and assume the line of succession! You mean, if I do.
Crichton's body is gone.
Someone used the processor to revitalize him.
Without his head, is that really a concern? They're still reconstructing the data but it seems, oh, great frell up, that his head was attached at the time! Someone retrieved his head? Do something, oh magnificent representative of a supposedly master race or you will surely die at my mother's hand.
And I, I will cheer her on.
Aeryn: Dregon, what's wrong? Nothing.
I've secured it.
You can come up now.
Are your lines stuck? I'm coming down.
-It's okay.
Dregon? -I'm just Are you injured? We're too high.
What? Aeryn: You've done this before, haven't you? Isn’t that right? You were rated expert, correct? At the training facility.
This is your first wall? Yeah.
Outside.
For the love of Cholak! All right.
Hang on.
Right.
Grab my hand.
Dregon, just grab my hand.
Good.
Good.
All right no -Help me.
Please.
Don't let me fall.
I won't.
It's fine.
All you have to do is hold on with that hand there.
That left hand.
Can you do that? You got it? Take a deep Take a deep breath! Take a deep breath That's it.
All right, now, hold on.
I've got you.
No, no, no, no, no, not my leg.
The wall! Hold on to the wall! Aah! Crichton: Where the hell are we? Don't worry about it.
Somewhere no one will find you.
That was not my question.
(Crichton grunts) (grunting): Ouch.
Is that your real name? John Crichton? -Yeah.
And which Sebacean house is that from? Hey now, if I tell you, I'll have to kill you.
Why is Scorpius here? You don't know? He's not part of my brief.
However, he seems to be part of yours.
Look, I appreciate that you have questions.
I'm sure you'll appreciate that I'm not going to answer them.
(grunts) I heard some of what Scorpius said.
He wasn't protecting you as an ally.
He was capturing you as prey.
You wouldn't like the truth.
The data scan listed John Crichton as non-Sebacean.
So, if you're not Sebacean, you're not Peacekeeper.
If you're not Peacekeeper, you're not Special Directorate.
If you're not Special Directorate, you can't be a Disruptor.
And if you're not a Disruptor, then you know too much about me.
Oh.
Well, there's more, but that pretty much sums it up, yeah.
That is either the most pathetic fabrication I've ever heard, or the most pathetic life I could ever imagine.
Either way -Oh, like they're whacked out antecedents to a chick with a stiletto in her wrist? Better.
So did you kill Scorpy? Leave bodies lying around, they look for a killer.
It's not like he's going to report the assault.
Then why choose me over him? Because I couldn't give a krag's ass about anything but my job.
Prevent the Scarrans from getting a claw on this empire.
You're my best chance of making that happen.
Assuming I'm willing to play garden gnome for the next 80 cycles.
John, if I fail, so many innocent lives will be lost.
Help me do myjob and I'll help you get what you want, whatever it is.
You know, things never work out like you plan.
That's what makes it fun.
Isn’t there any other way to contact help? Not unless a ship passes and sees us.
I told you before, these are the Devastator Reefs.
Boats never come here.
Well then, inland is our only hope, unless of course you want to stay.
Please.
Don't leave me.
Don't tempt me.
Zhaan: May the goddess recognize the gentleness of your spirit and guide you to your ancestors.
(sniffles) Pa'u Zotoh Zhaan.
You live.
As does Moya.
(deep whirring) (gasps) Zhaan: What kind of repellent game is this? Upon my first exploration of Moya, I knew the circumstances that produced her gunship offspring, and I knew she was a worthy soul.
Then why did you put her through this? To see if you were worthy.
These are gentle beasts who will ultimately follow the directions of those in control.
Should you desire it, priestess, you could produce an army of killing machines.
But Zhaan would never Of course she wouldn't.
We know that now.
We are confident that you will protect Moya vigorously against those who seek to exploit her.
You are worthy of that responsibility.
If that is so, then I demand you leave this ship immediately.
As you wish.
But first Moya wishes to speak with you.
Moya: Zhaan (laughs softly) One request.
Anything, Moya.
Moya: Sing.
(laughing) (applause) It's good that you came.
Do you know where Crichton is? Honestly? No.
But I'm as anxious to find him as you are.
For his wormhole knowledge.
Hmm.
That's secondary at this point.
I'm without accompaniment, totally unarmed.
Should the Empress wish to execute us, I have no doubt she would succeed.
So now we are allies? Hmm.
Effectively, yes.
I assume you know Sastaretski Cargn, the Scarran Emissary? And his alliance with Prince Clavor.
Who's next in line for the throne.
So, they are our natural suspects.
What do you want, Scorpius? I will help you get Crichton off this planet alive, collect the information I need from his mind and release him to you, unharmed.
You're half Scarran, aren't you? By which measure I should not be judged.
Cargn: Because it would find him lacking.
Ka D'Argo, is it? Luxan? A great race of warriors.
I am honored.
And to you, biological mistake, I commend your plan, having an agent marry the Princess.
How did you defeat my DNA alterations of her? Scorpius is not in league with Crichton.
We despise him.
Truly? Have I misjudged the situation that badly? Even if you establish diplomatic ties with this dynasty, that would mean that we, Peacekeepers, would have to respond, preventing it.
And that could mean a total conflagration.
But who would be seen as aggressor? All but sealing their access to the Uncharted Territories? (growling) Aah! -Luxan brute, where is Crichton?! I don't know.
Has he been reconstituted into flesh and blood form? Agh! I I don't know.
Is there anyone who does? Chiana think she does but Enough! I will offer you a deal.
I would rather race you to the Nebari girl Chiana.
The means to our different goals may be the same, Emissary.
What about the coming conflagration between our species? If you wish to provoke Peacekeeper might, well, we shall oblige, by defeating you.
I would still rather race you to the girl.
(groans) Please! "Please" Stop dragging you? No, but it I know, it hurts.
You want it to not hurt? Well next time hold on to the frelling wall! Rygel! Uh? Have you seen Chiana? No.
Have you tried (hiccups) looking under your sheets? I think Scorpius and the Scarran may have her.
They think she knows were John and Aeryn are.
We were looking together when she split off.
Yeah? -I'm so nervous, I had to stop for a bite.
Which I'm too nervous to eat.
Yeah, alright.
What's the matter? I asked around.
The last time the Empress threatened to execute off-worlders (hiccups) she did.
Rygel I need your help.
They're going to torture her and she doesn't know anything.
I'll float above the streets for a better view.
Yes! We'll find her.
What the frell is that? She does not know Crichton's whereabouts, as I suspected.
So, get rid of her.
I believe she may have another use.
I don't even want to know.
Cargn, we're through.
Everything you said would pass has not.
I'm simply trying to ensure your ascension.
If Crichton is not found by tomorrow, you'll be crowned.
Through no efforts of yours, sadly.
Which means I no longer need your allegiance.
The dissolution of our relationship is not yours to effect.
Look, my mother knows about us.
I can't be married until I renounce you.
I will not allow it.
I'm doing you a favor, a-hmm? She's going to start the ceremony by executing off-worlders.
Get out of here.
Hide.
Run.
There's no way for me to escape and you know it.
And I thought you were good.
I am.
I have one final question for you, duplicitous Prince Clavor.
What? Do you know that as promised, I am about to kill you? No no No! Yes.
Just a little tingling in the hands and feet.
I'm good to go.
Too late.
Local animals are carnivorous after dark.
Animals.
Okay, fine.
First light.
I have people to protect.
As I must mine.
Can I trust you? Oh yeah, I'm a regular Boy Scout.
I do what I have to do.
And I assume you do it well.
(sniffing) (growling) I, uh I have found Cargn.
It will take both of us to kill him.
Scarrans have exceptional strength.
And why do you think I'll help you? He has Chiana.
And you want her.
And you don't? I want John Crichton.
You'll never get Crichton.
He'll die first.
You underestimate the strength of a relationship even your friend does not yet understand.
(laughing) I want you to have this.
A little stuns and a lot kills.
Tomorrow will be dangerous.
Scorpius, Cargn, the Empress's anger.
Be careful.
I might not be able to protect you.
One step at a time, Jena.
One step at a time.
I'm sorry I brought this on you.
Do you always pursue women you don't know? If I'm drawn to them.
Would you be lying here helpless, giving up, if Crichton were back there waiting for you? You wouldn't understand.
Does your leg hurt? It's broken.
I'm trained to deal with that.
That's the answer.
You're not trained to deal with emotions.
So you're afraid of them.
Emotional pain you wear like a badge.
It means you've been there.
And it can't get calloused because each fresh hurt stings like the first.
Why would you want that? Because of all the days before it hurts.
The good days, when you're in love.
It's too bad you can't get back to at least tell Crichton how you feel.
What difference would it make? He's a frelling statue.
But he can hear.
He can see.
He'll know, Aeryn.
At least he'll know.
Crichton: You're late.
I'm moving a little slow.
Are you ready to do this? I've grieved with the best of them.
All right, showtime.
I hope it all works out.
One way or the other.
We're not compatible.
(glass breaking) You always know just what to say.
Not always.
But sometimes I know who to say it to.
Give me some time before you enter.
(grunting and panting) Aeryn.
What? Look.
Man: Hello.
Hello, do you need help? Stay there.
I'll come and get you.
Yes.
Dregon: Aeryn? Listen.
I know this didn't turn out like we wanted.
I know I was a hindrance.
But I was hoping we could go out again? No! No! This can't be! I'm sorry, Jenavian.
There was nothing we could do.
Surely the Empress knows that this is the Scarran's work.
How could she not? Of course she knows! And he will be the first one put to death.
Why the rest of us? Because, fool that he was, no offense, Prince Clavor was her son.
You will all be arrested and executed.
Crichton: I feel compelled to disagree with the Empress on that decision.
Crichton Crichton! Hey, Sparky.
Oh, thank the spirits.
Jena.
Sorry about your Prince, but I hear he deserved it.
(sobbing) Your Excellency, who defiled your position? Who rescued you? Later.
Rygel, what about the others? Nothing on Aeryn.
I'm sorry.
D'Argo's with Scorpius.
They think the Scarran has Chiana So they're gonna to kill him.
Crichton, wait! Where are you going? I don't know.
I'll let you know when I get there.
I'm assuming my execution is off.
Chiana! (whimpering) Stay back! He cannot damage your brain from this distance, but any closer There are two of us and only one of him.
How badly do you want him dead? (Chiana whimpering) No closer or the girl dies.
That will not help Prince Clavor become king.
Agreed.
This is about killing you.
The girl.
Has she told you where Crichton is? Of course not.
She doesn't know.
But she did say you aren't allies, and that in all probability, you did not come here to impede my plan.
It must be painful to realize that you are defeated, yes, defeated, by nothing more than your own suspicions.
Too hot in here, Scorpius? What's the matter? When he becomes incapacitated, I shall turn full attention to you! Nothing.
It's nothing.
Don't listen to him.
Because if you do, you'll know this mutant's weakness.
That his Scarran half loves the heat, thrives in heat, craves heat.
But his Peacekeeper half is destroyed by that same warmth.
Is this true? Thermal regulator suit, cooling rods inserted directly into his brain.
Tell me the rumors are true.
Please tell me your search for thermic constancy is tormentful.
(yelling) (screaming) Luxan coward.
Now you will die! Hey! Crichton! (screaming) You haven't defeated me! Obviously not.
But you dumped me in the acid, so let's see how you like it! (screaming) (screaming) Chiana! No! You're the best.
-How Batman was that?! You guys okay? We're fine, John.
It's good to see you.
You, too.
What about Scorpy? Is he dead? If he isn't, he should be by the time you come out.
(screaming) I'm not your enemy.
I'm not your friend.
You leave me the hell alone.
Or the next time we part, one of us will be dead.
I am sorry if it upsets your line of succession, but I am not going to be a statue again.
I understand your concerns, as I'm sure you must understand ours.
However, if you're the kind of man that would walk away from his own child, we would not want you to rule.
Child? What the hell are you talking about? My daughter is pregnant with your seed.
How? Whoa! How? No, no.
We never Samples from the DNA comparison.
Did you really think a system this stable would leave so important a detail to chance? Make me a statue.
You change your mind so quickly.
A child deserves two parents.
My child deserves a father.
Make me a statue.
Counselor Tyno, arrange for this honorable man to reundergo the transmutation process.
I'm afraid that's impossible, Empress.
Recall that Crichton is not Sebacean.
Based on our findings, human physiology would not tolerate the process a second time.
What the hell are you talking about? If you stood beneath that machine again, you would die.
She won't be defrosted for another 80 cycles.
I'm not going to live that long.
I won't be there for them! I know! I'm sorry.
You take my place.
I can't.
Nobody knows me, right? The public, they don't know who I am.
Your unveiling was to be your introduction.
Right.
Counselor Tyno can be your new king.
Their chromosomes are not compatible! It doesn't matter.
She's already pregnant.
And it satisfies everything that you need.
And it gives my child a good father.
And they love each other.
(headset beeps) What do you say? Does this work for you? Yes.
Thank you.
I'm sorry that I won't be around.
I'll never forget.
It's your call.
As long as the secrets we forge in this room do not escape, it can be done.
Well, there you go.
Good guys win for once.
And I have a child that I'll never know.
Princess Katralla wants to know if you'd like to see your offspring.
Yes.
Hi, there.
Hi.
Are you my Dad? Yeah, that's right.
I love you, Daddy.
You take care of my little girl.
So how come Crichton didn't kill Scorpius? D'Argo: It was a mistake.
One that I fear will come back to haunt us.
Yeah, but he can't follow us, right? Well Pilot says that we're safer now.
Did he tell you what happened to Moya? Zhaan, either.
Rygel thinks they were scared I just think they were lost.
Either way, they're keeping it to themselves.
Hey.
I'm very proud of you.
I'm proud of you.
You handled yourselfwell.
Well, you handled meself well, too.
What's the matter? Aw, I just can't stop thinking about Crichton will never see his daughter again.
Hits pretty close to home, huh? The fact that I may never see my son again is a grief I would wish upon no one.
It pains me to think of what he's going through right now.
It pains me, too.
And you thought we weren't compatible.
Zhaan said the surgical reconstructors did an excellent job on your leg.
There's no sign that it was ever broken.
Yeah, I was, uh worried about you when you didn't show up for the wedding.
Anyway, I'm I'm just glad you're okay.
And I have noticed that you're not talking to me.