Felicity s01e22 Episode Script

Felicity Was Here

Previously on "Felicity" What, you don't want me to go on the trip? - No, I think you should come.
You think I should or you want me to? Maybe taking a break is a good idea.
Listen, I never said anything about breaking up.
It's a little tricky, huh, not using those exact words? If I go on the road trip, I can't do the Berlin internship.
I realized I have to go, to, uh, to Berlin.
Say you will.
Come with me.
Do you think I should? Yeah.
Dear Sally, okay, so I've been thinking about it-- that moment I had with Ben - and I've come to the conclusion that obviously it was all in my mind, or at least mostly.
I'm sorry.
What? You're staring.
We're busy, and you're staring.
You should be stacking, but instead, you're staring.
I-- It's just part of my job to tell you things like that, because I am the assistant manager.
I know.
You're right.
You're right.
I'm not doing a great job, am I? I mean, good, but not great.
Danny, you're doing an excellent job.
You are the sweetest.
I hope you do come back here to work next year.
Me too.
I mean, it seemed like Ben and I had an almost-kiss moment, like Meghan's stupid love spell had actually worked but what it was, I'm sure, was just a nothing moment that I perceived as something else.
Anyway, whatever it was, it's had the strangest effect.
It reminded me of-- of why I made the decision to come to New York in the first place, of what it felt like in high school, of what I used to feel for Ben.
But it was nothing, which is a good thing, because if it had been an actual, genuine almost-kiss moment, life would get really complicated.
Okay, what the hell was that? What? Did you and I almost kiss? I don't know.
Did we? I think we did.
I'm sorry, Ben.
Lori needs to see you in the stockroom.
- Okay.
- I'm sorry.
That's okay.
I really like your haircut.
Oh, thanks, Danny.
This could get really complicated.
Sally, is it just me, or did this year go by faster than ever? I mean, it actually seems like time is speeding up.
Lately I've been getting up earlier every day.
I don't know why.
I guess it's the excitement of the end of the year or something.
I've only got a few days left.
I started to pack up my stuff.
Anyway, in my closet, I found this thing on the wall.
It's a list of all the people who lived in this room before me.
It went back to 1968.
Randall Clark Melissa Stone Keith Bradshire Patty Tagliabue - I mean, these names, these - these people I've never heard of.
And I-I just started wondering, you know I wondered where they are today, you know? How much they remember of their freshman year.
I wondered if they're all still alive.
Breaking up sucks.
Are you still coming to Epstein Bar on Saturday? Definitely.
Thank you.
By the way, you know, um I'm thinking maybe I shouldn't even go with Ben.
Why? Don't not go on account of me.
I mean, actually, you can't not go on account of me, because I was gonna ask you a favor.
What? Guys don't give the "I just need to be alone" speech unless they have another prospect, you know? So when you're on the trip with Ben, if he gives you any signs that there's someone else, let me know.
I found it.
Oh, good.
I couldn't find your computer disk, though.
I--I looked everywhere.
- * Take the way home * - I know it's here somewhere.
I'd stay and look for it, but I got to get to my last Ethics class.
- * To Sullivan Street * - Right.
Well, you can come back whenever you want.
* Cross the water * Um, here.
* Home through the town * Why don't you just keep 'em? - * Past the shadows * - I mean, you know you're coming back.
* That fall down wherever we meet * So, you gonna live here next year? Yeah.
Sean's got some new guy coming in for the summer, - * I won't come around * - and then I'll come back.
So I guess I might not see you before you go.
* I'm almost drowning * In her sea * - I'll-- I'll call you, okay? - Okay.
* To her knees * * Take the way home * You know what? Um, don't.
Don't call me.
And I don't mean that in a bitchy way.
- * That leads back * - I just - * To Sullivan Street * - I don't really feel like looking forward to a phone call as awkward as this.
* Where all the bodies * Okay.
* Hang on the air * - Have a good summer.
You too.
* If she remembers * * She hides it whenever we meet * * Either way now * * I don't really care * *'Cause I'm gone from there * Morning.
Come with me.
- What? - Well, I was - I was in bed last night, alone, which is weird.
Um, and I had this epiphany.
Why don't you come with me? To Berlin? I have my job with Dr.
Well, just for two weeks, you know? The-- the same amount of time you're supposed to drive with Ben.
I'm a little ahead of myself.
I--I already ordered you a ticket.
Oh, my God! Noel! I know.
It's a huge deal, you know, taking a trip like this.
I mean, on your own, let alone with me, but I've thought this through, and I'm telling you, it's a genius move.
You can't afford to buy me a ticket.
You so underestimate my financial acumen.
And just-- by the way, it's refundable, so on the incredibly off chance that, uh, that you say no, nobody gets hurt.
I can't believe you.
Well, don't say yes now.
Think about it and you know, say yes later.
Okay, you'll go or okay, you'll think about it? Uh, okay, I'll think about it.
Which I really didn't have to do.
I mean, who would say no to a trip to Europe with a guy you love who's your almost boyfriend? So I decided to confront this Ben thing head-on.
I'm heading over there right now.
Wish me luck.
I can't go.
You can't go with me? - No.
- Why? Why? Yeah.
Uh there are a million reasons why.
I-- I can think of no less than three reasons why.
Well, you know, I-I'd like to hear those reasons.
Uh first of all, there is the Noel factor.
Noel factor.
What, you think he'd get jealous? No.
He's far too mature for that.
He he invited me to Berlin.
Berlin? Really? Really.
And secondly, there is the Julie factor, which, I've got to say, is sort of killing me.
Yeah, I know.
I know the Julie factor.
You know how you said that Nicole made you feel so uncomfortable around Lynn - because she was like - - I know.
I know.
Okay, well, you're doing the same thing with me and Julie.
I mean, now I-I feel bad just hanging out with her - Yeah, but wait a minute.
There is a huge difference.
Lynn and Nicole were still dating.
- You and Julie just broke up! - Yeah, that's right.
We broke up.
What's the third? We b - we both know what the third is.
Tell me.
W- W hat's the third? The moment - the almost -kiss m- Don't pretend like you don't know what the third is.
Okay! Okay, okay.
I just How is that a reason for us not to drive cross-country? Because.
Because? That's your reason, because? Look, I don't know.
The Noel thing, you know Berlin sounds great.
It does.
Maybe you should go with him.
The Julie factor I don't really know what to say about that.
And the third thing, the only reason that is an issue is because in that moment we did not kiss, so it's like this - it's like this big, unanswered question.
Well, yeah.
I think you're exactly right.
I've wanted to do that for a long time.
Uh, where are you going? Uh, I don't know.
It's a flight reflex.
Felicity * I bought a toothbrush, some toothpaste * * A flannel for my face, pajamas * - * A hairbrush * - Hi.
- * New shoes and a case * - What are you doing? * I said to my reflection * - * Let's get out of this place * - I was just working on the hard sell.
What does that mean? - * Past the church and the steeple * - It's just a-a little Berlin slide show, you know, to give you an idea of what you'd be missing in case you say no.
* Billboards and the buildings * * And memories of it still keep calling * - Yes.
- * And calling * - Yes? - * But forget it all * - Wait.
Yes? - * I know I will * - Yeah.
- Yes.
And thank you for asking.
* Tempted by the fruit of another * Oh, do you realize how amazing this is gonna be? - * Tempted but the truth is discovered * - I know.
I-I haven't told my parents yet.
But I'm sure they'll be fine.
- * What's been goin' on * - Really? * Now that you've been gone * - * There's no other * - Actually, they're gonna have a huge problem with it.
No kidding.
But you know what? That's just gonna be their initial reaction.
- * Tempted by the fruit of another * - Don't worry about my parents.
We're going.
* Tempted but the truth is discovered * - We're going.
Oh, my God.
This is so great.
I know.
- Ben kissed you? - Would you keep your voice down? And you want to go with Noel.
- What? You don't think I made the right choice? - No, and neither do you.
Go with Ben.
And if Julie was sitting right here, I'd say the same thing.
McGrath: Good morning for the last time.
Look what I've got.
Damn it.
What? I messed up on this final.
You always say that.
This time I mean it.
How do you know? Did McGrath say something? Miss Porter.
Miss Tyler.
I'm sure you did great.
See? You did better than I did.
Felicity: Elena's obviously wrong.
I mean, I couldn't even consider going with Ben.
Right? * Slappin' leather was the vice * * During a wild streak in her life * * She had a cheap apartment * - * up on Royal Street * - So * She brought home just enough * - * To keep her on her feet * - This is it.
- * She don't believe * - Have a good time - * In anything * - at Wicca Camp.
- * But if you ask her * - See ya.
* She'll say * * There's plenty of things to believe in * * Sweet Rosalyn * - * Sometimes you gotta give in * - The second week of school, I wrote something down.
- * Sweet Rosalyn * - I put it in an envelope, sealed it shut.
* Sometimes you gotta give in * * Sometimes you gotta be loved * - * She got a number off the bathroom wall * - "There's no chance in hell * She was looking for a good time * - Felicity's going - * So she made the call * - to make it through the whole year.
" * Got a strangely calm voice on the other line * It's what I thought.
I was gonna give it to you when you left as, like, an "I told you so, " but, uh, you made it.
* He said, "Hello, my name is Father Tim * Anyway, I'm impressed.
- * "Seems to me your zeal for this life * - Thanks.
* Has been wearing a little thin" * Where are you living next year? * Sweet Rosalyn * Um, somewhere in the dorm.
- * Sometimes you gotta give in * - I think I might be an R.
- * Sweet Rosalyn * - Me too.
* Sometimes you gotta give in * See ya.
* Sometimes you gotta be loved * Come in.
So you've been avoiding me.
Well, I got your message.
But I got to say, I don't agree with it.
I really want you to come with me.
Look, I think that's really kind, but - No, it's not kind.
It's not.
It's what I want.
I mean, I understand what you're saying about Noel and about Julie.
I understand that, but I have this feeling it's what you want, too.
I'm going with Noel.
I-- W-W e have this whole plan.
Yeah, but so did we until you changed your mind.
I can't go with you because that would make me the devil.
Driving with me makes you the devil? - Yes.
Because it would be a direct affront to both Julie and to Noel.
You and I both know that if we were to drive across country I mean it would never be platonic.
So? Ben.
We'll make it platonic.
I don't care.
I just want to go with you.
I mean, we'll do it as friends.
That's--that's great.
I swear to God.
I just don't see how this could work.
Come here.
What? Just come sit down.
Why? Come on.
I'm--I'm not gonna do anything.
I'm not.
Just come sit down.
We are in the car.
This is stupid.
No, it's not stupid.
I'm just trying to prove a point here, okay? Okay.
I-I'm driving.
Oh, I-I'm sorry.
D- Did you want to drive? No.
You go ahead and drive.
I'm drivin'.
This is a smooth ride, wouldn't you say? Yeah.
What happens when we go to a motel and there's only one bed? One bed.
Lie down.
Come on.
Just try it.
- See? - Okay.
This could never work.
What? I think you should leave.
Look, I know you want to go, or at least you're thinking about me a little bit.
And how do you know that? Because you started wearing that necklace again - the necklace I got you.
Let's go.
Why? Come on.
Well, I still think you should think about it.
I've thought it through.
- Hey, can you guys hold that, please? - Hi! - Thank you.
- Hey.
- Hey.
How's it going? Good, thanks.
I just got to drop off my last R.
Report, then I'm done for the year.
- Have you gone to the passport place yet? - Not yet.
What? You got to go.
We only have a few days.
I'm gonna go to the passport place tomorrow.
We're, uh We're going to Berlin.
- Yeah, that - that's what Felicity says.
- Yeah.
Man: So, where are you going? Felicity: Uh, Berlin.
Oh, Berlin.
Really nice.
Oh, have you been there? No, but, uh, you know, people tell me.
Do you speak German? No.
You don't need it.
Okay, look right here - where my finger is.
This finger.
It'll just be a second.
Have you ever driven across the country? United States? Yeah.
How was it? It was one of the best times I ever had.
Really? Yeah.
Maybe the best.
It was great.
You gotta do that.
And you don't even need a passport, right? You just go.
Anywhere you want.
It's such a romantic thing, driving cross-country.
Ready? - Have a nice trip.
- Thanks.
Wherever you go.
I know who Ben likes.
Did he talk to you? No, Lynn did, and he told me about Nicole.
- Nicole? - Yeah.
It's so obvious.
They were swimming together.
They were always hanging out.
Of course it was her.
So you-- you think that Ben likes Nicole? - Yeah.
I guess she was making these moves on him, and that's why Lynn and her broke up.
- Can you believe that? - God.
Did you know about that? About Nicole? You knew that she was going after Ben, and you didn't tell me? It-- I mean, he mentioned something at work about her paying a lot of attention to him.
How could you not tell me that? I'm sorry.
I don't think he likes Nicole.
That's what Lynn said.
If it's not her, who is it? Felicity: I should've just come out and said, "Julie, I can't believe this, but I think the girl he likes might be me.
" But if I'd said that, she would've asked me what I felt about Ben, and I don't know how I would've answered that question.
I started to wonder.
I mean, maybe Elena was right.
What would be wrong with considering going with Ben? Considering doesn't hurt anyone, right? * Baby, what can I do? * * I've been out searching for you * * I've got a feeling all * I need is a love that's true * * Baby, what can I say? * * I know this won't go away * * I've got a feeling all* * I need is to see you today * * I've been watching the world pass by * * All around me * * I've been letting the days go by * * Till you find me * * Baby, what can I do? * * I've been out searching for you * * I've got a feeling all I * * Need is a love thay's true * Hey.
So, what if we did this? - I shouldn't even be here.
- Well, I'm glad you're here.
I was in bed last night, just trying to figure it all out - like, what it would mean if we went together.
How come everything has to have so much meaning? I mean, I've never met someone so desperate for meaning.
Look, I'm leaving tonight.
Are you gonna come with me? I can't be having this conversation, because I am the devil.
You keep saying you're the devil.
I'll tell you what.
You are not the devil.
- What if I am? Then what? - Then I'd still want you to come with me.
- You would not.
- Yes, I would.
Okay, first of all, you would not want me to go with you if I were the devil.
And secondly it's not just us.
I mean, you know, there are other people involved.
Yeah, but I like you.
I can't help it.
I mean, you're crazy and you analyze everything, and that kind of scared me at first, but I don't know.
You're really smart about things, and you've been a good friend to me.
And I really like you.
Look, we have the chance to go on this trip together, and I really want to do it.
I want to do it, too.
I found my disk.
* If you lied it wouldn't change a thing * * It don't take a bell to ring * * There you were the day before * * You knew you had to go * * You know it's never going to be the same * - Julie, I am really sorry that you heard that.
I should've come to you, and I should've told you something upfront.
That would've been hard.
I mean, how do you tell somebody that you're trying to steal their boyfriend? That's not what I was doing.
God, I feel so stupid.
When I was asking you if you thought there was another woman, I had no idea I was talking to her.
- Julie-- - He's a good kisser, isn't he? I did not plan this.
Julie I am so sorry.
You know what? I really don't care what the hell you are.
You can be sorry or not.
It doesn't matter to me.
You're just a lying bitch.
I don't know what to say.
You don't have to say anything.
I want you to leave.
Julie I'm not going with Ben.
I mean it.
Can you just get out of here? I mean-- I'm not going with Ben.
I'm I'm g- I'm going to Berlin with Noel.
I'm not really sure that you're going to Berlin with Noel.
What? I told him.
How could you do that? * So much stays unknown * Till the time has come * - * Did you imagine you could ever be * - Can we just talk? * So strong? * - * Then watch your fear * - I want that ticket back.
* Just turn into relief? * * Your sea of doubt become your own belief? * * Though years don't come to cry some grief away * * The years will help to keep your need at bay * * So come on, now, come on, now, child * * You're here just a while * * Come on, now, come on, now, child * Felicity: I just hope this whole year wasn't for nothing.
I hope I learned something.
When I came here, I didn't know anyone.
I mean, even the boy I followed to New York was a stranger, which it turns out, is why I followed him to New York.
- * My mother told me * - There were people here - * Just before she died * - that I'd never met * " Oh, darling, darling, * - - who just became so important to me.
- * "Don't you be like me * - It's like I don't know.
- * " You will fall in love * - I guess they just felt like - real friends.
* With the very first man you meet" * - * But, mother, mother * - I bet you get this a lot, right? - * Some will never know * - Kids at the end of their freshman year all crying about their lives, about the way things turned out.
Are you still thinking about becoming an R.
A? I don't think so.
Really? Yeah, I'm, uh kind of feeling like, "Who am I to be giving anyone advice?" You're someone who's been through it.
* Come on, now, child * * You're here just a while * So see you next year? * So come on, now, come on, now, child * * You're here just a while * * Come on, now, come on, now, child * * You're here just a while * Hi.
I thought you left.
I did.
I left, and then I came back.
Why? Why do you think? I mean, you didn't come back for me.
Yeah, I did.
I was driving, trying to think of some great reason to come back, something else to say to try to convince you.
See, I just know if you were me, you'd have, uh, some great reason, some big speech with all this meaning.
But I don't have that.
All I have is that I like you.
And that I got as far as Harrisburg, but I turned around and came back, so So maybe there's some meaning in that.
- Ben - I never wanted to hurt Julie.
You know that.
I can't stand how screwed up this is.
But at the same time I can't help how I feel.
So this is the, uh, this is the last time I'm gonna ask.
Will you come with me? Please? 'Cause I already know it's a better trip if we're together.
All right, look.
I'm gonna go back to the loft.
I'm gonna wait there till 10:00, and if you're not there, that's cool.
That's okay.
I'll see you in the summer.
Okay? I can't believe you came back.
Yeah, I know.
Felicity: It turns out Noel left me this incredible letter.
This is what he wrote - "Dear Felicity, "although it's true, it seems impossible - "nine months ago, I didn't even know you.
"Now I can say with absolute certainty "that there's no one on the planet "who means more to me than you.
"Whatever happened with you and Ben, "whatever happens with you and anyone, "it could never change the way I feel.
"So with that, I conclude this sappy yet sincere letter "and ask you to please seriously consider "using the enclosed.
Love, Noel.
" * I will remember you * * Will you remember me? * - * Don't let your life * - When I was 6 years old, - * Pass you by * - I had an ant farm.
After a few months, I opened the top, - * Weep not for * - left it outside.
- * The memories * - The next day, the farm was empty.
All the ants were gone.
But they left behind these tunnels, all these empty spaces they'd been living in, working in for months.
* I let them slip away from us when things got bad * * How clearly I first saw you * - I remember staring at - * Smilin' in the sun * - this empty ant farm, - * Want to feel your warmth upon me * - noticing one last ant still inside, - * I want to be the one * - still moving little grains of sand.
* I will remember you * * Will you remember me? * * Don't let your life * I watched him for a while, - * Pass you by * - until he began making his way through the maze of tunnels and finally climbing out the top.
* Weep not for the memories * Anyway, once he was outside on the grass, - * I'm so tired * - he just stopped.
I swear to God, it was like he was trying to decide which way to go.
- * Once there was a darkness * - But then, finally, off he went.
* A deep and endless night * - * You gave me everything you had * - So here's the thing - - * Oh, you gave me light * - I've made a decision.
I'm not flying home by myself.
* And I will remember you * I didn't have to make a decision between Ben and Noel, - * Will you remember me? * - buy I did.
* Don't let your life pass you by * * Weep not for the memories * * And I will remember you * - * Will you remember me? * - So, where to? * Don't let your life pass you by * I'll be home in a few weeks, and I'll send you a tape when I get there.
* Weep not for * Love, Felicity.
* The memories * * Weep not for the memories *