Felicity s02e05 Episode Script


Previously on "Felicity" I was preparing for tonight, and it just really hit me what a complete and total jerk I was to you.
- It's fine.
We got over it.
- Yeah, we did.
So why aren't you preparing for your big party? Because I am here inviting you to it.
Noel's gonna give me a walking tour of Bleecker Street.
Do you want to come? No, thanks.
I have a lot of work to do.
Then I will see you in class next week.
I thought you were going out with Ruby tonight.
Oh, she left.
She had to She had to go home for a few days.
How's that goin'? It's fine, it's nothing.
Can you, uh, pass the ketchup? Thank you.
What about you? You got any action to talk about? I mean, I'm not meeting anybody because I'm swamped with pre-med classes.
What's your excuse? Can we not talk about this? Well, we have to talk about something.
OK, this is crazy.
What is? The weirdness, the awkwardness the little looks you keep giving each other.
- That is so untrue.
- Yeah, come on, you’re being ridiculous.
I'm putting a stop to it right now.
Ruby told her that she thought you were hot and it's driving her crazy.
Elena Oh.
And he's going nuts worrying about the next guy you’re gonna date.
Look, the two of you can sit here all night and not talk to each other.
I've gotta study.
- Talk about someone who needs a date.
- No kidding.
Serious sexual frustration.
You bought a what?! A PlayStation.
Only $99.
These things are like time vacuums.
They take hours of the day and suck them away.
I've seen it happen.
And it's not pretty.
Didn't you ever have any video games when you were growing up? No, but I had a little doctor's set with little tongue depressors and fake stethoscope I remember my first time.
It was Atari, and I was 8 years old.
Those little stick figure men playing basketball There was something so simple and primitive about it.
And then.
Of course.
There was Nintendo which suddenly opened up a whole new world to me.
I could sit and play Super Mario Brothers for hours like the jumping and the spinning and the squashing.
This is pathetic.
No wonder you never get any action.
Whoa, I get plenty of action.
OK, maybe plenty's an exaggeration but it's not because of video games.
All right, I'm not watching you play this stupid game No, wait, it's not stupid.
See, the goal is to collect as many gems and crystals and relics as possible and then you move on to different worlds where you pass blimps and robots and dinosaurs.
OK, it sounds a little stupid.
It does.
But it's not.
I mean, look at these graphics! Whatever.
Just turn it down so I can get some work done because this song is driving me crazy.
All right, OK.
Dear Sally so Elena says that Noel's going nuts worrying about the next guy I'm gonna date which I think is really sweet.
Except he doesn't have anything to worry about since I'm not dating.
Which actually is fantastic.
Seriously, dating no one is the greatest feeling.
There's no pressure, no expectations, no trouble.
Felicity can I talk to you for a second? Um, I took a look at your drawing last night.
I wasn't sure, really which way to go with the shading and I probably could have spent a little more time on it.
Whatever you did, keep it up.
Really? You seem surprised.
I thought it was very good work.
Professor Sherman, this means so much to me.
It means a lot to me, too.
It means that you’re really learning something.
Yeah, I guess so.
Can I ask you a favor? This may seem a little unusual and forgive me if it's too personal a question but, uh do you have a boyfriend? Not right now.
Then I'd like you to meet my son.
He's a grad student here.
He's a photographer.
He's funny and sweet and very attractive.
That, um I mean, he sounds really great.
I know, it seems a little unprofessional but I have an instinct about this.
Really? So will you do it? So what'd you say? Obviously, I said no.
I told her I had a boyfriend after I'd already told her I didn't have one.
Oh, God.
Well, why are you getting all worked up? She asked you if you wanted to go out with her son.
You said no.
End of story.
No, not end of story.
She's totally changed her attitude about me.
Last week, she was tearing apart my drawing and now, all of the sudden, she gives me an "A.
" Do you think she gave you a grade you didn't deserve? All I'm saying is, she asks me for a favor and then gives me the best possible grade she could give me.
Well, I wouldn't worry about it.
I mean, setting people up is just something old people like to do.
- Really? - Oh, yeah.
Every time I see my aunt she's got a different fix-up for me.
I mean, no matter how much I tell her I am not interested she keeps pressing me.
"Go out with Danny, go out with James.
" I mean, if it were up to her all I would be doing is going out on blind dates.
- Hey.
- Hi.
- Hi.
- Who's going on a blind date? - No one.
Felicity's teacher tried to set her up with her son.
I hate to eat and run.
But I have a meeting.
I have to meet with my lab partner to prep for next Thursday's experiment.
I'll see you guys.
Where's Noel? I don't know.
I think he had some important work to do in the apartment or something.
So So I have muffins.
We could stay and have breakfast.
Yeah, OK.
So you gonna go? You don't want to stay? No, I mean on your blind date.
- Oh.
- Really? I like blind dates.
Actually, I just like dates.
I just don't really think I'm in the frame of mind for dating right now.
That's why you should only date B - list people.
B- list? Guys that you wouldn't go out with normally.
- So, as in not A-list? - Exactly.
'Cause after you break up, you’re kinda disoriented.
I don't think you would even recognize an A-list guy for, like, 2 months.
But B-list guys they're there to go out with and exercise the muscle.
What muscle? The dating muscle.
That's what I did after my Ben break-up.
Hey, you, uh, you need a hand? Oh, hey.
Yeah, are you working this shift? Yeah, Javier asked me.
I guess someone called in sick or something.
Why, is it a problem you and I working together? No, no.
Uh, I'm glad you’re here, actually.
There are 4 more of these, and they each weigh more than I do.
Ready? - Right here is fine.
- OK.
Excuse me.
Could l Yeah, I'll be there in just a second.
Actually, I was kind of hoping he could help me.
- Hi.
- Hi.
I'd like a poppy seed muffin and a coffee, black.
- I'll be back in one second.
- Sure.
What are you doing here? Trying to get a coffee and a muffin.
This is the right place.
Isn’t it? Yes.
I tried calling you.
Uh, yeah, my pager isn't working.
Sorry about that.
You want a poppy seed muffin? - And a coffee.
- OK.
There you go.
Uh, how about a cappuccino? I make a pretty good cappuccino.
I'm sure they are terrific but I know what I like.
One coffee.
To go.
There you go.
But I was wondering, you seem to be pretty good with muffins, and I'm trying something new.
I could use your opinion.
On your muffins? Trust me.
I don’t think you’ve ever tasted homemade muffins like this before.
Maybe you could stop by my office tomorrow afternoon? Um, I have class tomorrow afternoon.
- Oh, my God, class.
- Yeah.
Um, OK, how about tomorrow night? You don't have class then, do you? - No.
- No, OK.
Um, that's the address.
- OK.
- OK.
Sorry about that.
I'll go get the other sacks.
- Thanks.
- OK.
Maybe I should start dating.
I mean, I know what I said before that not dating was great but, you know, I mean, Ben's obviously doing it.
So is Noel.
Maybe Julie is right.
Maybe I should just get out there.
Yeah, out there.
So, what do you think is out there? Shouldn't you be in class? Only in theory.
Look, I'm on level 20.
I have 5 more to go, then I get the speed shoes and the Relic Time Warp Chamber opens up.
Can't you just save the game go get an education, and then come back? I could.
I just I want to finish this game.
Uhh, please? Hello? Who is it? Ah, hello? Hello? Hey, Ruby.
Yeah, what's going on? Right.
Yeah, yeah.
No, no, I'm listening.
Hold on, I dropped the phone, Ruby! Hold on, I'm coming! I'm coming.
I am.
Hold on, I can't find the phone! Hold on! Hey, you there? No, I'm sorry, I was, uh I was in the middle of something.
Um Yeah.
Yeah, so what's going on? Oh.
When do you get back? Well.
Then Right.
Maybe we can go out next weekend? Really? Great! OK.
- You’re ruining my lives! - What? - No, not you! - Uh, re-pause! Re-pause! - What? Re-pause! Yeah.
No, OK.
Yeah, I'll talk to you later.
OK, bye.
What the hell is re-pause supposed to mean? Re-pause! OK.
Bring up the depth over here comparable to this.
Right? OK.
And a little bit more definition here.
- Thanks.
- Great.
- Hi! - Hi.
Um, I'll do it.
Which assignment? No, your son.
I'd like to meet him if you’re still offering.
Great! I really think you two are gonna hit it off.
So, how ’bout tomorrow night? Oh, that's fine.
Um, shouldn't we maybe ask David first? I'll call him.
And, could you wear something light? I mean, you have a beautiful face and it should be lit.
And a little color on your lips would be great.
I'm telling you, it's food poisoning.
Carl, everyone eats the same food and you’re the only one who's sick.
I have a very weak constitution.
I feel like throwing up all the time.
Here's what you do: Get your rich parents to send you some money.
- My parents aren't rich.
- Take that money buy yourself a refrigerator get your own food, got it? Now leave.
Do you even listen to what you say to people? Not really.
Oh, that reminds me, some guy named David called.
He said to meet him somewhere at 8:00.
Or 8:30 something.
So which was it, 8:00 or 8:30? And meet him where? I don’t remember.
It was on the machine.
But I deleted it by semi-accident.
So I have a date tonight, and now I have no idea what time to be there? - Don't have a hissy, just call him.
- I can't.
I don't know him.
Wait, you’re going on a blind date? That is so pathetic.
Do you realize that you’ve reached a new sub-basement of pathetic? He's a grad student here, and his mother is my art teacher.
Oh, God.
What? Let me just see if I can spell this out for you: Grad student plus mother plus blind date equals gay.
He's not gay.
G- a-y.
Have fun! If you need to go to the bathroom go ahead.
I can wait.
I'm fine.
You should go, though.
Um, I don't have to go.
Well, good.
- Elena, come on! - Why can't I play? It's our living room, right? OK, whatever happened to video games being stupid a waste of time, a vacuum? I can suck away my hours any way I choose.
- Wait a second, you’ve been practicing.
- What makes you say that? You killed that 2-headed blond guy pretty easily.
Beginner's luck.
All right, I tutored this guy from my chem class.
He had PlayStation.
He worked while I played.
- Watch out for the frog! - Oh.
Sorry! - Let me try that again.
- No, look, look the only way we're gonna get past this spot and finish the game is if we work together.
I think it'd be good for us.
You know, we'd learn how to deal with each other, to share, to be unselfish, like roommates.
- What do you mean, like take turns, or something? - Yeah.
Good idea.
OK, so this is a little exciting.
I mean, it's my first post-Ben date.
I hope I look pretty enough.
My God.
I'm nervous.
I mean.
I'm excited.
Excited about getting out there.
I can't keep still.
have you ever been on a blind date? Can they actually be fun? I hope so.
What if we like each other? Wouldn’t that be amazing? I mean, I always have this feeling like I'm gonna click with the right person.
Maybe that person’s Professor Sherman’s son.
- Are you - David, yeah.
Hi, I'm Felicity.
So, um I guess let's go get a table.
So, welcome to Maggie's Catering.
It's nice.
A lot of flour.
Thank you.
Seriously, though, this place It's impressive.
When I started, I ran the whole business out of my own kitchen.
Really? So, you actually cook? Ha ha! For 6 years, I did everything myself cooked, baked, delivered.
My oven was so small, it used to take 6 hours to make a decent-sized batch of cookies.
- Don't touch that, please! - I'm sorry.
I'm sorry.
- It's OK, I forgive you.
- OK.
So, is it usually this quiet? The staff just went home.
Really? Mm-hmm.
What about those muffins? I'm actually all out.
You’re all out of muffins? So that was just like a little trick? Well, why don't you try an apple tart? - Oh, I'm OK.
- No, come on.
- No, I - Come on, just a bite.
- OK.
- OK.
It's good.
You got something on your It's Maggie's Catering.
Please leave a message.
Maggie, it's me Dr.
Simmons wants to totally change his order.
You’ve got to get your pager fixed.
This is a disaster.
I'm here.
What's up? Oh.
Uh, hold on.
I have to deal with this.
I'm sorry.
Oh, that's OK, that's OK.
I got a free tart, so Maybe we can finish this another time.
- Yeah, do you want to go out for dinner tomorrow night? - I'd like that.
- OK.
- OK.
All right, bye.
So, when did he decide this? So, did, um you always want to be a photographer? I guess.
I always liked pictures.
Your mom's a great teacher.
Growing up with her, it must have been interesting.
Uh, yeah.
Are your parents still married, or? Nope.
How is everything? Well, the food is delicious.
I'll bring one right away Would you excuse me for a second? You two can chat while I go use the bathroom.
- You want coffee or dessert maybe - Thanks, but no.
- No.
Chocolate mousse? - It's very good, thank you.
- Will you watch out for the bombs? - Those aren't bombs! No, you have to jump faster than that! - Hey.
It's Noel and Elena.
- It's Elena and Noel.
Leave a message! Hello? Are you there? I'm in hell here.
Where are you guys? - Hello.
- Hey.
It's Felicity.
Do you have a second? Oh.
Um, yeah, sure.
- Ahh, this is a nightmare.
- What is? My date.
My B-list date.
Now I finally know what "B" stands for.
Oh, come on.
It can't be that bad.
He's barely speaking to me.
Maybe he's just shy.
I keep throwing out topics and he keeps giving me one-word answers or grunts.
I don't think he understands the concept of a date.
I mean, I barely understand the concept but this guy What does he look like? Nothing that makes up for his behavior.
Well, if it's that bad, why don't you just leave? Thank you.
I'll call you later.
Listen Merci.
OK Slowly Uh-huh.
Slowly - OK.
A little faster.
- OK.
To the left.
Faster! Faster! OK, Noel, now.
Jump! Come on.
Noel! You have to focus! All right.
We have been stuck at N.
Cortex for 4 freaking hours.
Maybe we should just let's just take a break.
No way.
We're getting closer.
I can feel it.
I don't want to get your hopes up, but if we get desperate we can always call my cousin for help.
He's got a lot of contacts.
- Contacts? - In the video game world.
Will you get the door? I am not getting help from some geeky computer programmer.
Is Elena here? No! - Hey.
How was your date last night? - It was terrible.
I tried calling you in the middle of it.
Where were you? Here.
Sorry, we were busy.
Over, over, over! This is why you couldn't talk to me? I'm on the date from hell, and you two are playing a video game? - Ah - Wait.
I wasn't listening.
Huh? Are you are you ready to go or what? Oh, I don't think I can go out tonight.
Spin him! OK, you guys have to stop this.
This game is like heroin except worse.
Do you want to go downstairs for a bite? Not really.
What about getting something to eat? Die, you bastard Ha ha! Got him.
OK, well, this was so much fun but I have to go experience the real world.
I got it.
Oh! What are you doing? He's coming back! - I thought you were going out for the night.
I am.
- I just need to accessorize.
- That guy Carl hasn't been around, has he? - Not since I've been here.
He's driving me nuts about how that stupid refrigerator he bought isn't working.
So I guess you weren't ax-murdered by your blind date.
I survived.
It was terrible, wasn't it? Ha! Am I always right or what? This is perfect.
Is this Felicity's room? Maybe.
I'm sorry to drop by so late.
I'm sure I'm the last person you want to see after last night, but, uh Um Can we talk alone for a second? David what do you want? I was wondering if you and I can go out again.
- You’re kidding.
- No.
You think I don't want to go out with you again after last night? Well It was horrible.
I mean, seriously, have you ever thought about asking someone a question for a change? - I know, and - There's a give-and-take involved in conversing with someone.
You seem to have the take part down really well.
Just the give that seems to stump you.
You were self-absorbed.
And bitter.
The answer to your question's obviously no.
Just so you know.
That was the first date I've had in a while.
I could tell.
OK? I've been sort of a mess.
I was in France on a photo shoot and my girlfriend Jessica We'd been going out for a year She was supposed to come and meet me at the end so we could travel around together.
And she didn't show up.
She showed and explained how she was sorry but she was getting married to my best friend since I was 6.
And since then I've tried dating a few times but it was always a disaster so if I was a little out of it, it might have something to do with the fact that my world has been sort of upside-down.
Or maybe not.
Maybe I'm just a jerk.
Probably deserve everything you said.
I know I do.
I'm sorry.
I think you were a little harsh on him.
I love SoHo.
I used to live a few blocks from here.
Oh, yeah? Mm-hmm.
- Where do you live now? - Uh, Fifth Avenue.
- Fifth Avenue.
- Mm-hmm.
- It's a little vague.
Are you afraid I'm gonna come by start harassing your doorman or something? Yeah, something like that.
Listen, I live just around the corner.
Um Do you want to I don't know.
Do you want to come up for some Coffee? For some coffee, yeah.
Ha! You don't have any coffee, do you? No, I don't.
Ha ha ha! You still want to come up? You don't live with a bunch of frat boys, do you? - Is that what you think of me? - Yeah.
All right.
- You want me to taste that? - No, you don't have to taste anything.
If we can find a way to work together could be extremely beneficial for both of us.
See, you never should've told him what you do for a living.
That was your first mistake.
- Let me give you my theory on - Sean? - Yeah? - Don't you have to be somewhere? - Yeah, in a minute.
- No, it's OK.
I wanna hear this.
- OK.
Going to a catered party is like going to jail, right? Because the people there will eat anything.
They have no choice, right? They're stuck in one place.
They're starving.
So what you’re saying is that it doesn't matter what the food actually tastes like.
No, no, not at all.
What I'm saying is if you put out this condiment, smoothaise people then will be forced to try it.
Right? Because it's there.
Then they'll ask you where you got it from and then.
Boom! Suddenly, you and I are in the condiment market.
- OK, Sean.
- What? - Time to leave.
Before I do, if you just could you do me a favor and just taste this? That's all I'm asking for.
It's just a taste.
Don’t make her taste anything.
OK? - Just a little.
- OK.
A little.
There you go.
It's early yet.
It's still in the R&D phase.
Why don’t you give her a call when it's in the edible phase? How about that? OK.
You know what, give me 24 hours, OK? I'm going to a Russian spice store in Brighton Beach.
Open all night.
Ohh Sorry about that.
That's OK.
I have a strong palate.
I should, uh, I should go, too.
- Really? - Yeah.
I'm sure you have an early class in the morning or something.
No, no.
I got, uh I got nothing to do.
I, uh I think you should stay.
How old are you anyway? Hey.
I would kill for a cup of coffee right now.
So I really had a nice time last night.
Me, too.
When do you think I can see you again? I really don't think that that's such a such a good idea.
What does that mean? Hello? What does that mean? Nothing.
I just think that we both got caught up in the moment a little.
You know, I really don't care how much older you are than me.
It's not that.
It's not that? Yeah.
Look, I gotta go but I'II, um I'll call you later.
I don't understand why it needs to be in here.
Because this is where the repairman comes.
- Would you please tell him? - No, no.
Do not look at me.
This was your project from the beginning.
You talk to him.
- But he freaks me out.
- You know I can hear you, right? And I care about that why? You’ll make sure it's cold enough, right? Do you know what kind of diseases can grow in a broken refrigerator? I mean, if food is improperly preserved it's it's like a breeding ground for bacteria.
It'll be fine.
- Check back with me in a few weeks.
- A few weeks?! What's wrong with the fridge? Nothing.
The thermostat wasn't turned down but I told him it was busted so now you and I have separate fridges.
- Meghan.
- Hey, problem solved! Right? For you.
David, you didn't have to.
I And cookies in case you don't like flowers.
Probably not the best idea considering where you work.
I don't know exactly what I've done to deserve this but I mean, what would you have done if we'd had a good date? This is what I would want someone to do if they treated me the way I treated you the other night.
You know.
It was the first time I'd been out in a while And everyone my friends, my family they've all been on my case to go out.
Which, obviously, is not a reason to do it or an excuse for my behavior.
But I am sorry.
Apology accepted.
It's funny.
I guess we're kind of going through the same thing.
I was I was talking to a friend this was before I met you, and she was talking about, you know, getting out there and how how I should only be dating B-list people.
- B- list people? - Yeah, because, uh right now, if I met the greatest guy in the world I wouldn't even know it.
So you broke up with someone recently, too and I was your B-list person.
That was the plan.
Ah, you know, I was so busy sabotaging the date and I was a little drunk I never really bothered to look at you or listen to what you were saying.
Now I wish I had.
Is there any way you’ll give me one more chance and go out with me again? One? One.
Hold on.
Let me get a pen.
Go ahead.
Thanks, Alex.
It's never gonna happen.
It's like Super Mario all over again.
I get so close I can taste it, and it just - it just falls apart.
- Not so fast.
I just talked to my cousin and he gave me the number of a guy.
You got a number? He says he can help us get past this level.
Ahh, I guess we should call him.
- No! Forget it! Hang up! - What? We are gonna do this ourselves or we're gonna die trying.
Are you leaving? Uh.
My workday is done.
So Well.
Mine's just starting.
It sucks.
I heard that your teacher's trying to set you up with her son.
You guys ever go out? Well, yeah.
It didn't go very well but, um I think we're gonna try again tonight.
What about you? Are you seeing anybody? Yeah I don't know if we're seeing each other.
I don't know.
Was it the woman who came in the other day? You know, she was kind of older? Oh, she's not she's not that old.
I didn’t mean that in a bad way.
Well I hope it works out for you.
I hope it works out for you, too.
All right.
Well, I'll see you.
- Hey.
- What are you doing? Just fine-tuning smoothaise.
I think I had a real breakthrough here.
- You wanna taste this? - No.
Anyone call for me? No.
Oh, yes.
Your mother called.
My mother called? - Oh, man.
Did I just say your mother?- Yeah.
Ha ha! I meant your lover.
Very funny.
Hey, you know what? You're at your sexual prime she's at her sexual prime.
- Yeah.
- It's perfect, right? - Did she leave a number? - Yeah.
Her new pager number.
Apparently, she'll be running around all day.
It's on the counter over there.
But listen, watch out with her.
I mean.
I think she's a little out of your league.
- OK.
- I'm serious! I don’t want to see you get hurt.
I know.
The magazine needed pictures inside the bridge but the guard kept saying no till I got to 100.
And then he was like, - So he let you in.
- Yeah.
Inside Verrazano Bridge.
It's like a part of New York no one ever gets to see.
These giant cables that keep the bridge standing.
I got some incredible shots.
Uh, your mom says you're a great photographer.
Well, don't trust your source.
My mother has a tendency to exaggerate.
Yeah, tell me about it.
OK, when I was in junior high my parents were already telling everyone what a great doctor I would be.
My mom sent me to Europe to study the great painters.
I'm pretty sure it kills her every time she sees me with a camera.
Isn't it weird how parents have all these expectations for you before you can even have them for yourself? I know.
I feel like such a disappointment.
Isn't that horrible? Well, here's to 2 disappointments.
Is this Gary? I got your number from Alex and he says you can help us.
We're on the final boss level.
He wants you to get ready.
All right.
Now, when he starts throwing fireballs move all the way to the left.
Now what? He wants you to rush up behind him and then spin him towards the middle.
- It didn't work.
- It didn't work.
Now what? Noel, try it again, but this time, wait 5 seconds move back to the middle before you rush him.
Damn it! I died again.
That didn't work either.
- Did you try the jump-and-spin? - Yes, I tried it! He doesn't think you’re very good at this game.
Who is this guy? I don't think he knows what the hell he's talking about! Here.
Listen, jackass, do you have any idea what you're saying or are you just some moron who has nothing better to do with his time than sit around and give bad advice?! He's crying.
That's because he's 7.
Years old? Gary? He didn't mean that.
* Babe * * Last call was half an hour ago * * They're sweeping the floor * * But I can't find the door * * And I have to go * * They say move on * * But they don’t know * * How it is when there's nowhere to go * So, this is me.
I had a great time tonight.
So did I.
Well, good night.
Good night.
I don't know if you’re ever gonna want to go out with me again but I've been thinking about it and it'd be an honor to be your B-list person.
Hold on.
What? Oh.
I just wanted to make sure you guys aren't still playing that game.
Oh, no.
No, thank God.
We're, uh We're all through.
Besides, I decided, uh well, I'm a little too mature for video games.
- That's a relief.
- I know, huh? So, Elena's not here.
Uh, she went to the library.
But look.
Come in.
Hang out.
Yeah? OK.
I'm sorry about the um, stuff.
It's, uh What is this? It's nothing.
"The It Girl's Guide to Video"? Yeah.
Um It's actually, uh I bought it for Ruby.
It's just this little It's this little thing for renting videos.
I don't know.
It sounds fun.
Yeah, I hope so.
Hope she likes it.
So, what'd you do tonight? I just went and grabbed dinner.
Well, I was thinking about, uh going to grab some coffee.
You wanna come? - Yeah.
- Yeah? I would love to.
I don’t know why I didn't tell him about David.
I guess it just didn’t seem very important.
It's just weird talking about B-list people with an A-list guy.