Futurama s05e09 Episode Script

The Sting A hush comes over the crowd.
The only sound is Bender calling everyone else a jerk as he swings! And he slices into the water! Man! Boy, I tell you, buddy.
Bad news, everyone! You're not good enough to go on your next mission.
- Hooray! - Not good enough! - Why? Says who? - Because.
And says me.
It's an extremely dangerous mission that killed my last crew.
- And you're not nearly as good as them.
- Woo-hoo! We live to suck another day! Oh We're just as good as any of those other crews you sent to their deaths.
- What's the mission? - Collecting honey, ordinary honey.
- That doesn't sound so dangerous.
- This is no ordinary honey! It's produced by vicious space bees.
A single sting of their hideous neurotoxin can cause instant death! That's if you're not allergic.
You don't wanna know what happens then, no, no.
Your insides will boiI out of your eye sockets like a science fair volcano! I didn't want to know! These bees are larger than most Buicks and twice as ugly.
Larger than an American sedan? How big is the honeycomb? Honeycomb's big.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
- It's not small? - No, no, no.
It'll take more than deadly, deadly bees to keep us from doing our job.
- Come on, boys.
- But, Leela, we're no good.
Listen, I'm scared too.
But I'm more scared of disappointing myself.
I'm not scared of that at all.
Now, bees communicate by dancing.
Like my parents! Oh, wait, that was hitting.
So this language cartridge will let you distract them.
Ah, good.
I often have thoughts that can only be expressed through dance.
Bender, quick! Waggle something! Leela, let's turn back.
There's absolutely no shame in wussing out.
Relax, everything'll be fine.
Oh, my God! The old Planet Express ship! There's the black box.
Captain! The bees have us surrounded! oh, the professor was right! - We're not as good as his old crew! Well, I aim to prove him wrong.
It'll take more than a few deadly, deadly bees to- oh, Lord! I couldn't make that out.
Too much static.
Eww.
We found it! The honeycomb hideout! - Hey, what's this goop? - RoyaI jelly.
They feed it to the queen.
Bees make honey and jelly? How come nothing humans make tastes good? Help! I can't swim in jelly, as far as I know! Look! It's a baby queen! She's so cute! You adorable, wittle, itty-bitty, fuzzy, wuzzy- Leela, stop bonding and let's go! I got jelly in my underpants! I'm taking this bee with us.
With a queen, we can build a hive and make more honey ourselves.
Let me just pack her a lunch and we'll go.
Pick up the pace, lady! I'm sick of shaking my booty for these fat jerks.
I didn't mean you're all fat.
Just Fatso there.
Help! This is where we distinguish ourselves from the last crew.
Activate emergency high-speed, self-contained escape pack crisis response units.
Quick! Ow! Ow! Ow! Ah! Ooh! Ah! Good luck, Bender! I'm back, baby! - We made it! We're alive! - Burn on that old crew! The only things they did better than us were suck and die.
Leela, we got lucky this time, but you should be more carefuI.
- I don't want anything to happen to you.
- Thanks, but I can look out for myself.
- Frankly, I can smell danger a mile away.
- Look out! You want her? You're gonna have to go through me! You call that a wound? That's a boo-boo, tops.
But thanks for trying to save me, Fry.
Fry? He's He's dead.
Oh, who will make Bender waffles just the way he likes them now? It was all my fault! He died because of me! No, no, no, no, no, no.
I'm Iying to make her feeI better.
Husband, can't you go anywhere without lighting something up? It's an old Jamaican accounting tradition.
We burn his timecard.
That way his zombie doesn't come back looking for his finaI paycheck.
He looks so naturaI.
It's funny to think he's crammed full of sawdust and preservatives.
I only wish I could've removed the stinger.
I barely knew Philip.
But as a clergyman I have no problem telling his most intimate friends all about him.
Soothe us with sweet lies.
It may comfort you to know Fry's death took only 15 seconds.
Yet the pain was so intense that it felt to him like 15 years.
And it goes without saying, it caused him to empty his bowels.
We now commend Fry's body to the ages.
He's walking on sunshine now.
This makes me the oldest member of my family.
Him do good snu-snu.
Eh All those times I said, "Kill all humans," I'd always whisper, "except one.
" Fry was that one, and I never told him so! Farewell from the world of tomorrow! They say a spoonfuI of space honey helps ease the pain.
Mm.
It's good.
I feeI funny.
Ha-ha funny.
Huh? - Leela? - Fry? I thought you were dead.
Nope, I'm better than ever.
Before the accident, I couldn't do this: Impressive! But it does sort of support my you-are-dead theory.
Then I'll prove I'm alive by telling you something only I could know.
There's a surprise for you in my locker.
I got it at a Swedish novelty shop before we left.
It's too beautifuI to open.
Can I open it? Sure.
There's just one thing I want you to do.
- What? - I want you to wake up.
Wake up? But I'm not- In my dream, Fry said he hid a gift for me in his locker.
If it's true, then he must still exist in some form.
Of course he still exists.
As a frozen corpse in outer space.
Oh, I made myself sad.
Well, here goes.
- Oh - Bupkis.
Well, I feeI better now.
Pawning all the stuff in Fry's locker helped give me closure.
- Was there a gift for me? - No, nothing.
Not at all.
No way, José.
Here it is.
- You took this from Fry's locker? - The guy's dead.
There's no law against grave robbing.
That proves it! Fry is alive somewhere and he's reaching me in my dreams! Bull pies! Lay down here and we'll do some tests.
If Fry is out there somewhere Leela's brain could be acting as a five-pound Ouija board.
- Is this some sort of brain scanner? - Some sort, yes.
In France, it's called a "guillotine.
" Professor! Can't you examine my brain without removing it? Yes, easily.
Hey, what if Fry wasn't actually dead when we buried him? - You know, like Julia Roberts.
- Well, I suppose there's a slim- I don't believe it! What is it? Is Fry alive in some other dimension or something? No! According to this Gizmometer, Fry is dead and nothing can bring him back.
- Remarkable! - But, my dream! Your science can't un-prove that.
How could I have known - the gift was in Fry's locker? - Easy.
He told you about it before he died and your grief-roasted mind blocked it out.
Are you saying I'm going crazy? No, no.
No one's saying that.
But I'm certainly thinking it loudly.
Hi, Leela.
I'm just gonna keep talking even if you can't hear me.
- Blah, blah, blah.
Blah, blah, blah- - Shut up! I can hear you! The professor says you're just a dream.
Oh, yeah? Could a dream take you dancing in a Vanusian garden? Well, yes, technically.
But it's still very sweet of you.
Then what if we shared a midnight sleigh ride across the ice fields of Hyperion? Oh, Fry, you must be alive.
I've never been treated so romantically by my own imagination before.
Here, take my jacket.
You look a little cold.
Thank you.
It's all so beautifuI.
I forgot how many hundreds of degrees below zero it must be.
I just wish I could convince the others you're alive.
You can! All you have to do is wake up.
No, no! Don't say that! This is reaI! Not another dream! Fry's jacket! The one he was buried in! My dream was reaI! He's alive! Quit your bragging! My boyfriend's alive too.
Oh, not anymore.
That's better.
Fry's alive! I have proof! - What? - You do not! I'm from Jamaica, the "Show Me" island.
So show me you blowing it out your fanny.
But he gave me his jacket.
Look! That's not Fry's jacket.
Fry's jacket is red.
That's your jacket.
An off-the-rack lime-green affair.
But Fry- His jacket- And when I woke up it was on me! You're under a lot of guilt stress, Leela.
Here, work it out.
I am not under stress, damn it! Everything's going to be all right, Leela.
What? Everything's going to be all right.
Maybe I am freaking out a little.
A little? You're screwier than my Aunt Rita, and she's a screw! I need to calm down.
I better take some more of that space honey.
You've been taking space honey? Be carefuI, you purple-haired imbecile! One spoonfuI calms you down.
Two spoonfuls help you sleep.
But three spoonfuls, and you'll go into a sleep so deep you'll never wake up.
Never! Never! Never! One spoonfuI to calm me down.
Okay, I got a pretty good calm going.
Two spoonfuls to help me sleep.
Uh-oh.
Still awake.
I guess one more spoonfuI couldn't hurt.
Oh, my gosh! I better get a sponge! Fry? Is that you? I don't need a sponge! Why am I sticky and naked? Did I miss something fun? Incredible! According to the Gizmometer, Fry touched the royaI jelly in the space hive, leaving an imprint of his DNA and brain waves.
Then, when it spilled on the couch it recombined with trace amounts of Fry's hair and skin- And blood! Don't forget about Fry's blood.
Yes, Bender, thank you.
In short, the various fluids Fry left in the couch caused the royaI jelly to regenerate his entire being! - Neat.
- This is great! My buddy's alive and his credit cards are valid again.
Let's go get hammered! I should warn you, I'm a mean drunk.
- Fry, I'm so glad I didn't kill you.
- Me too.
Feeling responsible for your death was driving me mad.
- But now everything is all right.
- Not everything.
- What? What do you mean? - You have to wake up.
Wake up? Oh, no.
No! It can't be! Poo! I'm cracking up.
In my dreams I'm happy because Fry is alive.
But when I'm awake my mind plays tricks on me.
- Take it easy, Leela.
- In every life we have some trouble.
But when you worry, you make it double.
- Uh, were you just singing? - No, I was telling you not to worry.
I'm not allowed to sing.
Court order.
I'll find Fry's coffin, get his corpse and keep it under my mattress to remind me he's dead.
That'll prove I'm not insane.
Okay, it's just an ordinary coffin containing my ordinary dead friend, who I killed! What happened? Why am I in my apartment? You killed Fry! You killed Fry! - You killed Fry! - Stop it! Stop it! You killed Fry.
Okay, I'm insane.
But I'm still sane enough to know it.
The only time I feeI all right is in my dreams with you.
Three spoonfuls, then I can dream forever.
One.
Two.
Here goes.
Goodbye, waking world.
Leela, no! Listen to me! You don't want to lie in bed and do nothing the rest of your life.
- I've tried it.
Bedsores hurt! - Then what am I supposed to do? - Fight it! - I can't! You can! The Leela I know doesn't give up this easily.
Okay, I'll try.
Go away! I don't know if you can hear me.
But there's something I wanna tell you.
- I love you.
- I'm so scared, Fry! - I don't know what to do! - Just wake up, Leela.
Please.
- Just wake up.
- I don't understand what you mean! Just wake up.
Please.
Just wake up, Leela.
- Fry.
You're alive.
- Leela! You're awake! Of course I'm awake.
You wouldn't stop waking me.
Where am I? In a hospitaI.
The ambulance took you here after the bee stung you.
But the bee stung you.
It barely touched me.
The stinger went through me and you got all the poison.
My new spleen came from a guy who liked to motorcycle.
Vroom, vroom.
Sweet three-toed sloth of ice planet Hoth, she's awake! You were in the best coma I've ever seen! The doctor said you'd never wake up.
- Really? How long was I out? - Two weeks.
Fry never left your side for a minute.
And he talked nonstop.
Like a parrot of the sea, he was.
I thought maybe if you heard a familiar voice it might help keep your mind together.
- But who knows if it really got through? - It got through, Fry.
It got through.
You could really use a shower.
You too.