Glee s01e11 Episode Script

1ARC10 - Hairography

Here's what you missed last week.
Quinn's parents found out she's pregnant because Finn told them in song.
- We didn't even have sex.
- They kicked her out.
Now she's living at Finn's house.
Everyone thinks that Finn's the father, though really it's Puck.
I don't care if that baby comes out with a Mohawk.
I will go to my grave swearing it's Finn's.
- And that's what you missed on - #Glee # Hey, fella.
Unless my write-up in Splits! magazine naming me cheerleading coach of the decade has me driven completely insane I'm pretty sure you and I had an agreement that you were going to show me your Glee Club set list for sectionals.
Sorry, Sue.
I didn't think you were all that interested in Glee Club anymore.
Not interested? Why, I'm the fine arts administrator or something.
Um, well, I will make sure you get a copy.
That'd be fantastic.
I'd hate to have to go to Figgins about this.
- Hey, Will? - Yes? I'd like my magazine back, please.
Thank you.
Here's the problem with Sue Sylvester.
You never quite know where you stand.
I knew she was up to something.
Five, six, seven, eight.
Step, step.
Un, da, seven, eight.
Step, step, uh.
You guys go.
Step-ba Brittany.
Coach Sylvester didn't tell me to do this.
It kept getting worse.
Hey there, pal.
Would you remind me once again the names of the schools you'll be competing against at sectionals? Jane Addams Academy and Haverbrook School for the Deaf.
Got it.
What are their zip codes? She's leaking our competitive set list to the other schools.
If the other Glee Clubs get set lists and videos they'll know exactly how to beat us at sectionals.
Well, first, don't let Sue distract you.
All right? And if you can't take Muhammad to the mountain then you got to get Muhammad to bring the mountain down to his house.
Muhammad's house, wherever he's staying.
- I don't understand.
- Look, you should drive over toJane Addams Academy and ask the director point-blank.
If something's going on, you'll know.
All right.
You're a good kid, Aphasia.
Why did you try to rob a bank? Because, Miss Hitchens, that's where they keep the money.
Go back to class.
Hi, Miss Hitchens.
I'm Will Schuester from McKinley High.
Aphasia, give Mr.
Schuester his wallet back.
She's She's good.
Um Uh, thank you.
Thank you for seeing me.
We don't get a lot of other educators paying us visits.
Um, well, the reason I'm here is A little weird.
So I guess the best thing for me to do is just come right out with it.
I think our cheerleading coach has been passing along our set list for sectionals to you.
What kind of messed-up school are you people running? You think that because our students are thieves and arsonists, we're cheaters too? No, no, no.
It's not you.
It's Sue.
Do you know that we don't have costumes or even an auditorium? Our show choir has to practice out in the rec yard.
This is Ohio.
We have weather.
You don't have to tell me about underfunding for the arts.
Look, all I know is that our choir seems to be the only thing that keeps my girls from recidivism.
It makes them feel good about themselves.
I'm not gonna cheat and risk that just so we can get a leg up on your school of privileged misfits.
Especially from what I hear.
We're probably gonna take you anyway.
Really? And who'd you hear that from? I had my spies at your invitational.
- Want some coffee? - Please.
I'm I'm really sorry.
L- I didn't mean to offend you.
Let me make it up to you.
You guys don't have an auditorium.
Come use ours.
Yeah, let's have a little, uh, scrimmage at our place.
Okay, guys, so, first of all I want to welcome Miss Hitchens and theJane Addams Glee Club.
We're all very happy to have you guys here.
So, um, we're gonna let you guys start us off.
Let's see what you got.
Hit it.
#Jayelle, can you handle this # #Shadonta can you handle this # #Aphasia, can you handle this # # I don't think they can handle this # # Better move 'cause we've arrived # # Lookin' sexy Lookin' fly # # Baddest chicks chicks inside # # Deejay, jam tonight # #Spotted me, a tender thing There you are Come on, baby # # Don't you wanna dance with me # #Can you handle, handle me # # Lookin' hot Smellin' good # #Groovin' like I'm from the hood # #Over my shoulder I blow you a kiss # #Can you handle, handle this # - #Y eah # - #I don't think you're ready for this jelly # # I don't think you're ready for this jelly # # I don't think you're ready for this # #'Cause my body's too bootylicious for you, babe # # I don't think you're ready for this jelly # # I don't think you're ready for this jelly # - # No, no # - # I don't think you're ready for this # #'Cause my body's too bootylicious for you, babe # - # Move your body up and down # - #Ooh # - # Make your booty touch the ground # - #Ooh # #I can't help but wonder why # # Is my vibe too vibealicious for you, babe # # I shake my jelly at every chance # #When I whip with my hips you slip into a trance # # I'm hopin' you can handle all this jelly that I have # # Now let's cut a rug while we scat some jazz # # My body # # My body # # Pow, pow, pow, pow # # I don't think you're ready for this jelly # - # I don't think you're ready for this jelly # - #W hoo, whoo-ooh, baby # # I don't think you're ready for this # #'Cause my body's too bootylicious for you # # I don't think you're ready for this jelly # # Don't think you're ready, baby No, no, no # # I don't think you're ready for this # - #Is my body too bootylicious for you, baby # - #A hh # # I don't think you're ready for this jelly # - # I don't think you're ready for this jelly # - # Baby # # I don't think you're ready for this # #'Cause my body's too bootylicious for you, baby # Yeah.
Good luck.
Good luck.
Schue, you seem concerned.
What? No.
I mean, they were great.
But we're just as good.
Schue, if I may What they were doing was just all smoke and mirrors.
- It's called "hairography.
" - What? Hairography.
All the whizzing of their hair around just to distract from the fact that they're not really good dancers.
And their vocals were just so-so.
Trust me.
We have nothing to be afraid of.
All right, guys, I did some thinking last night.
I think I found our new number for sectionals.
We're gonna do the title song from Hair.
Now, this show started a revolution.
Wait, did they have Mohawks back then? Like in the '20s or whatever? Yeah, Mr.
Schue, if we're gonna do a song about hair, shouldn't we have more hair? I'm one step ahead of you.
Here are your wigs.
- Cool.
- Mr.
What are you doing? We are fine the way we are.
We don't need hairography.
It's just a distraction.
Look, I have to be honest.
Those Jane Addams girls did freak me out a little.
And I'm worried about our chances for sectionals.
I mean, we have to pull out all the stops if we wanna win.
Lookin'great, guys.
Saw it in the bookstore.
Figured I'd steal it for you, you know, in case you change your mind decide you wanna keep it.
That is so sweet.
To be honest I really don't know what I'm gonna do about it anymore.
My mind's pretty messed up about everything.
Well, whatever you decide.
No pressure.
Thank God for Puck.
Thanks to him, I'm starting to realize that what I need right now, even more than looser pants, is acceptance.
Everyone is putting so much pressure on me.
It's so easy for them to be distracted.
I don't have that luxury.
I am under siege.
You don't drink diet soda, do you? Because the phosphoric acid causes male pattern baldness.
- The baby's a girl.
- Women go bald too.
You worry too much, Terri.
Mom smoked and drank a bottle of Riunite on ice every night when she was pregnant with us, and we're totally normal.
Just take your vitamins, stay out of the hot tub and avoid rum-based drinks, and you'll be fine.
Maybe the problem isn't that I don't wanna keep the baby.
The problem is that I don't wanna keep the baby with Finn.
Maybe I didn't give Puck enough of a chance.
He is the real dad, after all.
Finn would freak if I started spending time with Puck though.
I need to distract him so that I can take Puck for a test drive.
But how? Mmm.
Forget about it.
She looks like a five-year-old.
Still, maybe with a little bit of makeup.
Hey, Kurt can I pick your pink brain for a second? Why, hello, Quinn.
To what do I owe the honor? I do believe this is the first time you've ever spoken to me.
I'm sorry about that.
Anyways, I have a proposition to make.
- A makeover.
- I'm in.
Makeovers are like crack to me.
- Uh-huh.
- My suggestion: Spanx.
Or a double-knit camisole with a control top for the baby bump.
Also, baby doll dresses dead giveaway.
Not for me.
For Rachel.
Why would I wanna do that? I admit I like a challenge as much as the next guy but Rachel somehow manages to dress like a grandmother and a toddler at the same time.
My point exactly.
You're as concerned about the Glee Club succeeding as I am.
And she's a distraction.
Look at her.
She's wearing a pantsuit.
Don't you think the judges are gonna take one look at her and maybe wanna knock her down a peg or two? And to think I thought you were a dumb blonde.
- Good night.
- Good night.
What are you doing? - I'm trying to be intimate with my wife.
- No, you're trying to have sex.
- Well I - Not intimacy.
If you wanted intimacy, you you would ask me how I'm feeling about being pregnant.
You're right.
I'm sorry.
It's okay.
It will all be worth it when she shows up, right? Yeah.
Of course.
- Love you.
- Love you.
There's no way I can keep this up.
He's gonna catch on.
I miss him too though.
I do wanna have a family with him.
I only ever started lying about all of this to give us a chance.
I just need to buy myself some more time.
I've got to distract him with something.
But what? Oh! The key is to never wax above the eyebrow.
Always shape from below.
Trust me.
I get a lot of practice.
Look at mine.
Kurt why did you volunteer to give me a new look? One, I'm a sucker for makeovers.
And two, you need something to distract from your horrible personality.
Most of the time, I find it hard to be in the same room with you.
Especially this one.
Which looks like where Strawberry Shortcake and Holly Hobbie come to hook up.
You're extremely talented, Rachel.
Watching you perform is amazing.
But sometimes it's hard to appreciate what a good singer you are because all I'm thinking about is shoving a sock into your mouth.
Well, what kind of makeover did you have in mind? We need to broaden your appeal.
I want every boy at school to do a double take when you strut past.
Well, there's really only just one boy that I'd like to impress.
- Can you keep a secret? - Of course.
- I'm in love with Finn.
- Really? I understand completely.
Let's move on to makeup.
I happen to know for a fact that Finn is attracted to loose women.
What? Quinn is so wholesome.
Let me put this into musical theater parlance.
In Grease, what did Sandy do to get Danny Zuko? She had to ditch the poodle skirt and slap on a catsuit.
In short, she had to dress like a ho.
Maybe if your look was better more desirable Finn would be in your arms right now.
Instead of Quinn's.
- What's going on, Ter? - Just a couple more steps, okay? - All right, stop.
- Okay.
Is that the Blue Bomber? Oh! It is.
I remember I took you to prom in this car.
- We did it in the backseat.
- Well, this isn't actually your old car.
- I found this one on eBay.
- You know, I always regretted selling this car.
I know.
That's why I got you this one.
I thought maybe working on it would be a a distraction - from all the pressure that you've been under.
- You are the best.
- Oh! - Mmm.
- Ho-Honey? - Yeah? Um, could you go and get me a frozen yogurt? Yeah, yeah.
Maybe I'll stop by Pep Boys.
- Maybe they have some advice.
- That's a good idea.
- Yeah.
- Take your time, honey.
- How can you bring her here? What if he saw her? - You're gonna wanna hear this.
I gave Little Miss Peroxide my phone number in case of an emergency, and she called to drop the bomb on me! What? What bomb? What is it? I'm keeping my baby.
Oh Look, we had no intention of discriminating against your Glee Club, Mr.
We extended an invitation to theJane Addams Academy to perform because we're lucky enough to have better facilities than they do.
And you think we don't have the same problem? I run the Glee Club at a school for the deaf.
Do you think I'm rollin' around in deaf choir money? Sure, my kids may be deaf, but that shouldn't distract everyone from the fact that they still have a song in their heart and they should have the same chance as everyone else to express it.
Now, I had scarlet fever as a kid, leaving me deaf in one ear.
So I remember what it's like to have full hearing.
But my poor kids don't know the difference.
All they know is that they love performing and then they have to hear that McKinley went and invited those bad girls to the school? - That's just not fair.
It's not fair.
- I think your phone's ringing.
- What? - Your phone's ringing.
No, I got it on vibrate.
All I am saying is that it would be nice if you went and hosted another scrimmage and had the courtesy to invite us this time.
- I couldn't agree more.
- What's that? - I said, I agree with you.
- Okay.
I can't hear you.
- Talk into this ear.
Scarlet fever.
- I'm sorry You're on! Um, how's Monday? - No.
It has to be Monday.
- Yes, all right.
L-I can't wait to to see the kids do their numbers.
Well, you don't have to make fun of me with those hand gestures.
No, I didn't I didn't mean to.
Let me check with my secretary.
Oh, damn.
Four missed calls.
What's that? Oh, l-I didn't say anything.
Yes, thank you.
I take it black.
Two sugars.
- Hello? - Hello? - Hello? - Hello? I can't do this anymore.
It's time to tell him.
- Terri? - Yeah, honey? - Oh, hey, Kendra.
- Damn, Will.
You make one sexy grease monkey.
I am having so much fun.
Working with my hands, searching for parts all over town.
I feel like I'm in a Springsteen song.
Well, I gotta get some old dish towels, mop up the grime.
Oh, God.
That car is a perfect distraction.
I would get something like that for Phil if I didn't think it would make him so happy.
What's the difference? He's gonna get pretty damn suspicious when I come home from the hospital without a baby.
You need to relax.
And drink more.
- I have got this whole thing figured out.
- You do? Mm-hmm.
Blondie's due date is right around spring break.
You and I are gonna have a little ladies' week at a spa down in Cincy that caters to the prenatal set.
But in reality, we're gonna be camped out at Woo's office with Quinn until that high school hussy drops.
That's a great plan except for the fact that Quinn won't give us her baby anymore.
But she will, dummy.
We have to distract her with the reality of her situation.
How are we gonna do that? She needs money.
I'm gonna have her babysit my kids.
Five minutes alone with those little mongrels, and she'll have her tubes tied.
- You're so smart.
- You got the beauty but I got the brains and the beauty.
Hey, Rachel.
Hey, Finn.
I didn't see you there.
Did you want to ask me something? Uh, yeah.
L-I just forgot.
I got distracted.
I'm glad I got your attention.
I wanted to know if you wanted to come over on Friday night.
As someone who's had long, luxurious locks since I was a toddler in the pageant circuit lfigured I could give you some tips on our Hair number.
Yeah, that-that'd be great.
Uh Great.
How's 8:00? Objective achieved.
Commence phase two.
Hey, Quinn.
I, uh, wanted to ask your permission - to maybe do something on Friday night if you're - Oh, that's fine.
I'm babysitting anyways.
Oh, uh, cool.
I'll see you.
- Okay.
- Yeah.
What are you doing on Friday? Just the usual.
I was gonna stand outside the 7-Eleven looking depressed until someone offered to buy me beer, but - What's going on? - You wanna maybe babysit with me? Some of you, particularly the guys, have come up to me with some questions about hairography.
One of our own has volunteered to walk us through it.
She has got it down.
Brittany, take it away.
Take what away? - Show us what you got.
- Oh.
All right.
So, hairography it works best when you pretend like you're getting Tasered.
So you just move your head around like you're spazzing and stuff.
- Wow.
- Very nice.
- Yay, Brittany.
- She's really good.
See, guys, it's like cool epilepsy.
- Come on, guys.
- Oh.
- Let's see what you got.
- Whoa! - Yeah.
- Good, guys.
Just relax and go for it.
- All right.
- Looks crazy.
You look crazy.
Oh, I just swallowed some.
When is the lying gonna stop, Sue? I don't know what you're talking about.
You've been spying on me, and we both know it.
You'll do anything to torpedo Glee Club, and it has got to stop! I resent that accusation, William.
And one I understand you've been making to our friends at Haverbrook and Jane Addams.
And it's an outrageous affront to my sterling reputation! That being said, fine.
I have been checking up on you.
Because I don't like what's going on in there.
Do you know why I make each of my Cheerios wear her hair pulled back in a ponytail? Because I don't want to distract from her impeccable talent.
You seem to be taking the opposite approach, Will.
And that leads me to believe you know your kids don't have what it takes.
- I believe in my kids.
- Well, maybe in the beginning, but not now now that you've seen the competition that threatens your very position at this school! You're going to get me an updated set list by 5:00 tomorrow.
And if there's anything on that list that involves demeaning, fruity hair tossing, I'm cutting it! I will not let you dictate my number choices.
And you are not getting that list.
Well, then I'm back as codirector.
Okay, guys, from the top.
I'll just be a second.
Thanks again for helping me out with this hairography stuff.
I mean, you know, it's all about getting warmed up.
Could you think of a song, maybe, that we could practice with? What about the the one from Grease? Y- You know, we did it when you firstjoined the club? Well, uh, okay.
Only I was just mostly nervous that day, but it Tell me about it, stud.
# I got chills # #They're multiplyin'# #And I'm losing control # #'Cause the power # #You're supplyin' It's electrifyin'# #You better shape up # #'Cause I need a man # - # But my heart is set on you # - Wait.
What's wrong? I need to be honest with you.
I'm I'm really uncomfortable right now and I'm gonna say this as nicely as I possibly can but you look like a sad clown hooker.
- What? - This look, it itjust isn't you.
I mean, maybe when I first saw it, I was caught off guard by the fact that you looked all adult and stuff, but it's not what's really great about you, Rachel.
I actually like the way you usually dress sequined leg warmers and stuff.
I thought this is what you liked.
Not at all.
I was just having this conversation last week with Kurt, and he asked me So, what kind of girls do you like? Oh.
Uh, well, I like them when they're natural and stuff.
Uh, not a lot of makeup.
Not skin-tight clothes.
- That sort of thing, you know? - Totally.
I feel like an idiot.
No, no.
This is my fault.
It isn't right for me to be here anyway.
But I really like you, Rachel.
I gotta go.
- I told you we should have been the cowboys.
- My bad.
What are we gonna do about this? Who are you texting? Uh, Mike Chang.
He's got wig problems.
Well, put the phone down and help me with this knot.
I've almost got it.
Stop that! Not the table! Think of something! I brought my guitar.
Why don't we sing them a lullaby.
Give me this.
Hey, kids, look at me.
Want to see a real, live music video? - Yeah.
- Okay.
#Papa, I know you're going to be upset # #'Cause I was always your little girl # #But you should know by now # # I'm not a baby # #You always taught me right from wrong # #I need your help Daddy, please be strong # # I may be young at heart # # But I know what I'm sayin' # #The one you warned me all about # #The one you said I could do without # #We're in an awful mess # #And I don't mean maybe # # Please Papa, don't preach # # I'm in trouble deep # # Papa, don't preach I've been losin' sleep # # But I've made up my mind # # I'm keepin' my baby # #Ooh, I'm gonna keep my baby, mmm ## Sing it again.
I think this is the first time they have all been asleep at the same time.
- What's that smell? - Soap.
- You got them to take a bath? - Mm-hmm.
What are you, an exorcist? She's like a jet, right? I need a new clutch and a new set of shocks, but She is really comin' together.
What are you gonna do when the kid comes? You can't put a car seat in that thing.
No latch system.
You were awesome tonight.
I was surprised at how I kinda enjoyed it.
I was worried about you at first.
You seemed distracted all that texting to Mike.
Distracted? I was the opposite, babe.
I was totally into it.
All I know is we proved something tonight.
This parenting thing we can do this.
You set me up! With Finn! Looks like someone is running for drama queen again.
How could you do that? I thought we were friends.
And what made you think that? You should be thanking me.
All I did was help you realize that your schoolgirl fantasy of running off with Finn was nothing but a fairy tale.
You like him.
That's That's what this is.
And you were just trying to eliminate the competition.
I was just helping him understand that you are not a viable second choice.
You think I'm a second choice? - A distant second.
- You think I'm living in a fairy tale? If I were second, or if I were 50th, I'd still be ahead of you, because I'm a girl.
Okay, here's the dope, princess.
There's no hope for either of us.
He loves Quinn.
They're having a baby together.
We're nothing but distractions.
The sooner we realize that the better.
Keep your paws off my man.
- Clear? - Who's your man? Don't play stupid, tubbers.
Oh, and for the record asking someone to babysit with you is super '90s.
- I happen to know that Puck cares about me.
- Oh, wake up.
While you two were babysitting, Puck and I were sexting.
Sexting? Sexy texting.
Seriously, what era are you from? While you two were playing house Puck and I were trading super-hot texts.
Why don't you check his cell phone? 'Cause my sexts are too hot to erase.
Thank you all for coming.
We are so honored to have you guys here.
So, without further ado, I present the New Directions.
#Yes # #So crazy right now # # Most incredibly # # It's your boy Artie # #It's your girl Mercedes # #You ready # - # Hey # - # Uh-oh, uh-oh, uh-oh, oh, no, no # # Uh-oh, uh-oh, uh-oh Oh, no, no # # I look and stare so deep in your eyes # # I touch on you more and more every time # #When you leave I'm beggin'you not to go # #Call your name two, three times in a row # # I'm hairy high and low # # Don't ask me why I don't know # - #Oh, oh, oh, oh # - #Got me lookin' so crazy right now # #Your love's got me lookin' so crazy right now # #Got me lookin' so crazy right now # #Your touch got me lookin' so crazy right now # - # Give me a # - # Head with hair# # Long, beautiful hair # #Shining, gleaming # #Streaming, flaxen, waxen # #Got me hopin'you page me right now # #Your kiss got me hopin' you save me right now # # Lookin' so crazy, your love's got me lookin', got me lookin' so crazy in love # #Hey # #Got me lookin' so crazy right now # - # Hey # - #Y our love's got me lookin' so crazy right now # #Got me lookin' so crazy right now # - #Y our love # - #Y our touch got me lookin' so crazy right now # # Down to here, down to there Down to there # # Down to where it stops by itself # #W here it stops by itself # - #Got me lookin' so crazy right now # - #W e're crazy # - #Y our love's got me lookin' so crazy right now # - # Hey # - #Got me lookin' so crazy right now # - # Hey, hey, hey # - # Hey, hey # - #Y our touch got me lookin' so crazy right now # #My hair's goin'crazy right now ## It didn't work at all, did it? That was just the rehearsal.
It's still just a little rough.
But we're onto something.
# Imagine there's no heaven # # It's easy if you try # # No hell below us # #Above us only sky # # Imagine all the people # #Living life for today # - # Imagine there's no countries # - #Imagine there's no countries # - # It's not hard to do # - # It isn't hard to do # - #Nothing to kill or die for# - #Nothing to kill or to die for# #And no religion too # # Imagine all the people # # Living life in peace # #You # #You may say I'm a dreamer # # But I'm not the only one # # I hope someday you will join us # #And the world will be as one # # Imagine no possessions # #I wonder if you can # # No need for greed or hunger # #Abrotherhood of man # # Imagine all the people # #Sharing all the world # #You # #You may say I'm a dreamer # #But I'm not the only one # # I hope someday # - #Y ou will join us # - #Y ou'll join us # #And the world will live as one # Hey, babe.
Um, you really don't want to do that.
- You lied to me.
- I'm sorry.
I tried to resist Santana.
I did.
But I'm young, and girls have this power over me.
- But, hey, it's all good.
- It's definitely not all good.
- I thought you wanted to be with me.
- I do like, a lot.
But you haven't given it up to me since the night I knocked you up, and Baby, I'm a dude.
I have needs.
So you expect to raise a baby with me and text dirty messages to every other girl at this school if I don't give it up to you every day? No.
Just the hot girls.
I'm gonna be a good dad but I'm not gonna stop being me to do it.
You can have her.
Are you serious? A girl really needs a good father and the only way she's gonna get that is if I give her to you.
You think Mr.
Schue's gonna be a good father, don't you? Yeah.
I think he's gonna be an amazing dad.
- Hey, guys.
- I thought you were gonna be at the scrapyard all afternoon.
Oh, yeah.
Uh, change of plans.
Got distracted with something else.
Uh, Quinn, what are you doing here? Oh, girl talk.
We're exchanging pregnancy war stories.
That's nice.
Well, when you get a sec, can you meet me out in the garage, Ter? Oh, I was just leaving, so Yes? Later, Mr.
You know I hate surprises.
- Where's the Blue Bomber II? - Ah, I sold it to some kid for a tidy little profit.
Let him have the fun.
I made enough for a down payment on a car for our whole family.
Oh, Terri I love you and our little girl and I don't want anything to distract me from you guys.
- Hi.
- Hi.
Can we be in love again? I have to tell you something first.
I, uh, want us to be honest with each other no matter what.
You can tell me anything.
Uh l-It's not really even that big a deal.
I mean, I didn't actually do anything, but the other night when you were babysitting I kinda went over to Rachel's house.
But nothing happened.
I just was worked up about us fighting and then she put on this really weird Catwoman suit and so I think something could have happened, but i-it didn't.
Because I only want to be with you.
It's all right.
Thank you for being honest with me.
I love you, Quinn.
I love you too.
Hey, Sue, you got a sec? Sure.
I owe you an apology.
L-I did think the kids needed to be a little more showbiz and I was wrong.
That isn't who they are.
So thank you for helping me see that.
Oh, and, uh, here's the new set list.
Wow, these are great choices, William.
"Proud Mary.
"Smokin'hot deep cut.
- Smokin' hot.
- Don't mock me.
- Sorry.
- Oh.
I don't recognize this last one.
Oh, that's the new addition.
Yeah, I want the kids to forget everything I taught them about hairography because We're starting from scratch.
Grab a stool.
- So we're a stool choir now? - No.
We're not dancing with the stools.
No gimmicks.
No false theatricality.
We're just gonna sit in them and sing.
Thanks, Mr.
This is their set list from sectionals.
"Don't Stop Believing.
" That's in.
"Proud Mary" performed in wheelchairs.
That's in.
Now, I suggest you take these two songs split them between your two groups and I'll pull some strings and make sure that Schuester and his group perform last.
That way, it'll look like he stole the songs from you.
Um, who do you think I am? That's actually a very good question, because I've forgotten both of your names.
Look, I spend every waking hour of my day trying to teach those girls that lying and cheating is not the way you're ever gonna get ahead.
And you're suggesting I do exactly that so that they can win a singing competition? Yeah, pretty much.
I think you're missing an opportunity to give your girls a second chance.
These McKinley kids are gonna do fine.
But outside of Glee Club, your girls don't have a heck of a lot going for them.
And I'd hate to see them so devastated by losing that they give up entirely.
You know how many deaf choirs have won this competition? Okay, everybody's gonna need to speak up, because I can't hear.
Deaf in one ear.
Scarlet fever.
I assume you read lips.
Read these.
Never let anything distract you from winning.
#You with the sad eyes # # Don't be discouraged # #Oh, I realize it's # #Hard to take courage # #In a world full of people # #You can lose sight of it all # #And darkness still inside you will make you feel so small # # But I see your true colors shining through # # I see your true colors # #And that's why I love you # #So don't be afraid to let them show # #Your true colors # #True colors # #Are beautiful # #Like a rainbow # #Show me a smile then # # Don't be unhappy Can't remember when I # # Last saw you laughing # #If this world makes you crazy # #And you've taken all you can bear # #You call me up # # Because you know I'll be there # #And I see your true colors # - #Shining through # - #Shining, yeah # # I see your true colors # #And that's why I love you # - #So don't be afraid # - #A fraid # #To let them show # #Your true colors # #True colors # #True colors # #Are beautiful # # Like a rainbow #
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