Glee s02e05 Episode Script

The Rocky Horror Glee Show

# Michael Rennie was ill # # The Day the Earth Stood Still # # But he told us # # Where we stand # # And Flash Gordon was there # # In silver underwear # # Claude Rains was The Invisible Man # # Then something went wrong # # For Fay Wray and King Kong # # They got caught in a celluloid jam # # Then at a deadly pace # # It Came from Outer Space # # And this is how the message ran # # Science fiction # # Double feature # # Oh, oh, oh, oh # # To the late night # # Double feature # # Picture show ## # In the velvet darkness # # Of the blackest night # # Burning bright # # There's a guiding star # # No matter what # # Or who # # Who you are # # There's a light # # Over at the Frankenstein place # # There's a light # # Burning in the fireplace # # There's a light # # Light # # In the darkness # # Of everybo-## Ho, ho, ho, ho! Schuester! You messing with my woman? - I - - I thought we had a deal.
This is the face of a guy who stepped in it.
How did it get to this? How did a production of Rocky Horror turn into- My horror? It all started a week ago.
- Hey, Em.
- Hi.
What's with your crusts? You- You always cut them off.
I must have forgotten this morning.
You forgot? Carl and I had the most amazing weekend.
We hit the revival theater downtown for the midnight show of Rocky Horror.
- You're kidding.
- No.
Isn't that where everyone dresses up and yells stuff? Yes.
Yeah.
I mean- Well, we don't dress up- at least, not yet.
Isn't that theater a total dive? - It's disgusting.
It's horrible.
- I know.
There isn't a surface that isn't covered in spilled soda so you'd think it'd be a nightmare for me, right? But I don't know.
I'm having so much fun that I don't even notice.
Huh.
Mmm.
And get this.
You know how I've always been very anti-Halloween- 'cause it totally freaks me out to think about eating candy that someone else has touched, right? Well, Carl and I are gonna dress up as characters from the show and we're actually gonna go trick-or-treating.
The sandwich, the dirty theater- He's actually making her better.
I'm gonna go as Janet, because I always choose the ginger and- - He's winning.
- Puffy skirts and- Why the hell didn't I think of taking her to that damn show? Oh, it's so weird that you brought up how much you love that show because just last weekend I decided to have the Glee Club perform Rocky Horror for the school musical this year.
- Uh, wow, Will.
- Yeah.
- Cool, right? - Very, very cool.
- That's so- - I mean, who knew that Rocky Horror was so important to both of us? Yeah.
Yeah, I guess so.
Isn't there some pretty risque material in there though? Oh.
Yeah, I'll probably have to make some edits here and there but it's worth it to expose the kids to one of my favorite musicals of all time.
- Huh.
- I love that show.
Wow.
Yeah.
Mmm.
Well, I'm thinking you're gonna have to edit the whole thing out if you're gonna get Sue and Figgins to sign off on it.
But, um, that's really exciting.
Right.
- Go, Rocky Horror.
- Oh.
- Um, yeah.
- Yeah.
So what are you gonna be for Halloween this year? I'm going as a peanut allergy.
Great news, guys.
I've had a little inspiration.
This week's musical lesson isn't really a lesson.
- It's a musical.
- Please be Evita.
Please be Evita.
Rocky Horror.
- Nice! - I've never seen it.
- Mr.
Schue? - Yeah? While I admire your choice of the groundbreaking '70s musical aren't you worried that the adult themes might be a point of controversy? Seriously.
A school in Texas couldn't even do Rent.
Caused an outrage and they had to cancel the show.
Isn't that the whole point of the arts- pushing boundaries doing things people say you can't do, for the sake of self-expression? I got it all figured out.
I cut out some of the more risque sections and I'm sending home permission slips to all your parents to make sure that they're okay with it.
And we are going to charge admission, and use the proceeds to help pay for transportation to nationals in New York.
- Ooh, yeah.
Okay.
Let's talk about casting.
- Oh.
Finn and I will play Brad and Janet.
- Oh.
- And I'll be playing the guy in the wheelchair, right? - That's what I was thinking.
And I thought Kurt could play the role of Frank-N-Furter.
No.
There is no way I'm playing a transvestite in high heels and fishnets, and wearing lipstick.
Why? 'Cause that look was last season? - I'll do it.
- Really? It's like the male lead.
I know, but I'm feeling a little more confident about my singing voice, after our duets project.
Great.
I have no problem with that.
We're a little short on female roles so we're gonna have to double up on Columbias and Magentas.
It's standard practice on Broadway.
It'll preserve your voices.
I'd like to preserve you in a jar- - In my basement.
Sam.
I'd like you to play the role of the creature.
From the Black Lagoon? Rocky.
He's like the Frankenstein character, but blond.
You'll kill the part.
He's cute, just like you.
Better start working on those abs.
Are you kidding me? You could cut glass with these babies.
I have no problem showing off my body.
Okay.
Looks like we got ourselves a show.
So then, after the Time Warp, Riff Raff, A.
K.
A.
Kurt takes us to Frank-N-Furter's lab.
I have no idea what's going on in this script - and it's not in a cool Inception kind of way.
- Just try, okay? So then they take off our wet clothes and we do the rest of the scene in our underwear.
- Wait.
I'm in my tighty-whiteys? - Yeah.
But I can't be on stage in front of the whole school in my tighty-whiteys.
They're gonna be able to see my whole business.
Come on.
It'll just be like going to the pool.
I wear a swim shirt at the pool.
I tell everybody it's because I burn easily, but, look- I know I'm a big athlete, and it's not manly or anything but I'm kinda insecure about how I look.
Come on.
You just- You know, you have a different body type.
I don't look like Brittany or Santana but you still think I'm hot, right? Mmm, yeah.
Of course.
So then you're just gonna have to trust me that you're the hottest guy in school.
- Okay? - Okay.
Come here.
All right.
So- Then, after that, Frank-N-Furter's gonna come down in an elevator.
When he comes down, we are scared.
I might faint.
making it the zoo's first Unitarian chimp wedding in over six years.
- And we certainly wish the couple well.
- Oh, yeah.
And now, let's mosey on over to Sue's Corner.
Take it away, Sue.
Thanks, Rod.
You know, Halloween is fast approaching- The day when parents encourage little boys to dress like little girls and little girls to dress like whores and go door to door browbeating hardworking Americans into giving them free food.
Well, you know what, western Ohio? We've lost the true meaning of Halloween- Fear.
Halloween is that magical day of the year when a child is told their grandmother's a demon who's been feeding them rat casserole with a crunchy garnish of their own scabs.
Children must know fear.
Without it, they won't know how to behave.
They'll try frenching grizzly bears, or consider living in Florida.
So, moms, skip trick-or-treating this year and instead, sit your little toddler down and explain that Daddy's a hungry zombie and before he went out to sharpen his pitchfork he whispered to Mommy that you look delicious.
And that's how Sue sees it.
Sue, you're the cat's pajamas.
And we'll be right back.
- Ridiculous.
Hello, Sue.
I'm Barry Jeffries.
This is Tim Stanwick.
We're the new local station managers down at WOHN.
- Do you mind if we sit? - We loved Sue's Corner last night.
Oh, yeah.
You know, we come from the world of cable news and we have ideas.
You see, good news is about information but great news is about fear.
- For example.
Tim? - Mmm? - Did you hear about that swarm of Africanized killer bees? - No.
Wouldn't it be awful to see an entire town - overrun by killer bees? - I'm sorry.
Did you just say, Tim, an entire town overrun by killer bees? - Well, I just- - There's your quote.
And you can replace killer bees with whatever you want.
Terrorists.
- Mexicans.
- Mexican terrorists.
- Ants.
- Mexican terrorist ants.
So what can I do for you? Someone at this school is seeking the stage rights to Rocky Horror as this year's musical.
I take it you know the show.
When I was younger, I took my sister to the show.
The audience was so enraged having a disabled person in their midst- You know what they did? They threw toast at us.
Um- Uh- - Whoa.
- You want me to shut it down? No.
No.
We want you to do an expose proving that the secular-progressive agenda has finally arrived here, in the Lima, Ohio School District.
Sue it's got local Emmy written all over it.
We have a deal? All right, places, Finn and Rachel.
I wanna start with "Dammit Janet.
" Oh, I cannot wait till Finn takes his top off - so we can all see the hotness underneath.
- What are you talking about? You can't have sloppy joes every day for lunch and get away with it.
Um, that's incredibly rude.
Is it? Guys whisper behind our backs about how we girls look every day.
- They objectify us all the time.
- She sort of has a point.
Yeah.
Earlier today Artie asked if he could make a gigantic omelet when I'm done with the ostrich eggs I'm smuggling in my bra.
I'm super looking forward to seeing Sam in his gold bikini.
It's gonna be "ab-ulous.
" - Can we get on with rehearsal, please? - Yeah.
I agree.
Yes.
Let's stay focused, guys.
All right, Riff Raff and Columbia and Magenta- Team one.
Take your places.
Let's rock and roll.
- Major Chord] - Whoo! - Hey, Janet.
- Yes, Brad? I've got something to say.
Uh-huh? I really love the skillful way you beat the other girls to the bride's bouquet.
Oh! Oh, Brad.
- # The river was deep but I swam it # - # Janet # - # The future is ours so let's plan it # - # Janet # - # So please don't tell me to can it # - # Janet # # I've one thing to say and that's dammit, Janet # # I love you # - # The road was long but I ran it # - # Janet # - # There's a fire in my heart and you fan it # - # Janet # - # If there's one fool for you then I am it # - # Janet # # I've one thing to say and that's dammit, Janet # # I love you # # Here's a ring to prove that I'm no joker # # There's three ways that love can grow # # That's good, bad or mediocre # # Oh, J-A-N-E-T# # I love you so # - # Oh, it's nicer than Betty Monroe had # - # Oh, Brad # - # Now we're engaged and I'm so glad # - # Oh, Brad # - # That you met Mom and you know Dad # - # Oh, Brad # # I've one thing to say and that's, Brad # # I'm mad for you too # What made you think you could get away with doing this show without my knowledge? I didn't.
I was hoping just to run out the clock until it was too late to stop us.
Who says I wanna stop you? I appreciate how Rocky Horror pushes boundaries.
So you're not gonna fight us? Perhaps not.
I just wanna be involved, Will.
The arts matter.
Fine.
Join us.
Play the part of the criminologist.
- We need someone with authority.
- Done.
- Great.
We rehearse tonight.
- Fantastic.
- Give me time to do my rewrites.
- I'm sorry? Yeah, it says right here in my contract that I get final script approval and I wouldn't fight it, Will.
I'm a notary public.
See you on the boards, buddy.
Seventy-five.
Chicken, egg whites, fish- no salmon- oatmeal, brown rice- but not after 6:00 p.
m.
No butter or oil, and no soda.
That's all you eat? - Ain't no carpool lane to sexy.
- Damn straight.
I don't know, man.
I never used to think about this stuff.
I mean, we're guys.
When did this start to matter? I personally blame the Internet.
Once Internet porn was invented, girls could watch without having to make that embarrassing trip to the video store.
Internet porn altered the female brain chemistry making them more like men and thus, more concerned with our bodies.
But doesn't it get exhausting thinking about what you eat- - Working out like a madman? - Nah.
If I miss a workout or eat a hot dog, I hate myself for a few days but the fact is, if I wanna be cool if I wanna get Quinn for good, I gotta look the part.
If you get up on that stage and look like the Pillsbury Doughboy no way you're staying popular.
Come on.
Let's do some squats.
I think maybe that's why Sue's been such a bully all along.
She really just wants to be included.
Listen.
I really don't wanna overstep my boundaries here but I really need your help.
I need to find all these costumes and nobody knows Rocky Horror like you.
I don't know.
Would you mind coming on board as my costume designer? Are you serious? You're not kidding? I would love to.
I'd love to! It's gonna be a lot of work, and we're gonna be spending a lot of time together.
Yes! It's a dream come true.
I mean the costume designing is a dream come true.
Not the spending a lot of- Not that spending a lot of time wouldn't be, but- Because of Carl.
I've got the Carl.
Yeah.
Carl.
I know.
- Mr.
Schue? My parents read the script, and they're pulling me out of Rocky Horror.
What? I really wanna do it, but they're just not cool with me dressing up like a tranny.
I hate to let you down, but I'm out.
Becky, that is the best Halloween costume I've ever seen.
Thanks, Coach.
There's only one thing missing.
Go scream at some fatties.
Oh, and, Becky, next year when you trick-or-treat as me you'll need to be clutching a bright, glittering local Emmy.
Uh, Sue, I've got some bad news.
We lost our Frank-N-Furter, and I can't find a replacement.
Musical's canceled.
- Yeah, that's cute.
That's good.
Look at this.
See? I'm gonna have to squeeze into this.
They were out of the latex panties, so I got the see-through.
See? Take your sick, perverted sex games out of this school! - No, no, no, Sue.
This is not what it looks like.
- I should have known.
People who dress like librarians- All sex addicts.
I'm sorry.
And you are? Oh.
Okay.
Carl, meet Sue.
Sue, this is my boyfriend, Carl.
Sue.
How do you do? Okay.
I was just showing Emma my Halloween costume.
- We're both sort of, uh, Rocky Horror fans.
- Sort of? - Well, yeah.
- Please.
- Carl knows the lyrics to every single song.
- Every song.
- He has an amazing voice too.
- Well, for a dentist.
For a dentist- Oh.
- You okay? - Oh! Yeah, Carl, it's just, my heart is, uh- It's breaking just a little bit.
I'm not sure if you know this about me, but I am a huge proponent of the arts in schools, and, well, even at this very school- Gosh, we're failing.
And, you know, when the kids don't have arts, they turn to drugs and with drugs comes tooth loss and- Are you ready for a chilling statistic? Seventy percent of all teeth in this school are wooden.
Seventy percent? Is there anything I could do to help? - I don't understand.
You guys have a hole to fill, and I'm just trying to help fill it.
- Wanky.
- Santana.
Well, you know I can't just give you a role.
You'd have to try out.
Fair enough, but I'll need a lady to sing to.
Ems? Okay.
"Hot Patootie.
" B-flat.
# What ever happened to Saturday night # # When you're dressed up sharp and you felt all right # # It don't seem the same since cosmic light # # Came into my life I thought I was divine # # I used to go for a ride with a chick who'd go # # And listen to the music on the radio # # A saxophone was blowin' on a rock-and-roll show # # You'd climb in the back seat Really had a good time # # Hot patootie, bless my soul # # I really love that rock and roll # # Hot patootie, bless my soul # # I really love that rock and roll # Come on.
# My head used to swim from the perfume I'd smelled # # My hands kinda fumbled with her white plastic belt # # I'd taste her baby pink lipstick and that's when I'd melt # # She whispered in my ear Tonight she really was mine # # Get back in front Put some hair oil on # # Buddy Holly was singing his very last song # # With your arms around your girl You try to sing along # # You felt pretty good # Whoo! # You really had a good time # # Hot patootie, bless my soul # # I really love that rock and roll # # Hot patootie, bless my soul # # I really love that rock and roll # # Hot patootie, bless my soul # # I really love that rock and roll # # Hot patootie, bless my soul # # I really love that rock and roll # # Hot patootie, bless my soul # # I really love that rock and roll # # Hot patootie, bless my soul # # I really love that rock and roll ## Yeah! No, no, no, no.
Wait, wait, wait.
- This will not do.
- Excuse me? For this musical to continue, we need a Frank-N-Furter, not an Eddie.
Eddie was eliminated in my rewrites.
Sue's right.
You wanna play in our sandbox, sing a Frank-N-Furter number.
Well, I'm sorry, bro, but I think it's fine to wear the Frankie bustier in the privacy of your own home.
I'm freaky like that.
But don't you think it's inappropriate in a high school musical? At least if I play Eddie I won't have to grind up against the students.
You know, Eddie's an important role.
If I did it I'd be showing my support for the arts.
You telling me how to direct my show? - Well- Will.
- Mr.
Schue? I'd like to play Frank-N-Furter.
I was rereading the script yesterday and it said, "Don't dream it, be it.
" And it's my dream to play a lead role so I figure, why not me? I'd be all kinda crazy sexy in that outfit.
And I can reinterpret the number a little bit- Make it more modern.
I'd really like the chance, Mr.
Schue.
Well, there you go, Will.
You killed two birds with one stone here today.
Congratulations.
Look- You got yourself a Frank-N-Furter and an Eddie.
This is outstanding.
- Are you ready for our first dress rehearsal? - Mm-hmm.
Okay, guys- Places.
Uh, Mr.
Schue? Uh, I know I'm supposed to be in my underwear for this scene and I'm totally down with that.
I thought maybe I would save it for the opening, if that's okay.
Um, also, Miss Pillsbury is there a way I could wear, like, some gold board shorts, or something? These are really short, and I'm afraid I'm gonna show off some "nut-age.
" - Well- - We'll take a note.
We can't stop, guys.
It's a dress rehearsal.
Come on.
Keep goin'.
And action.
Oh, Brad, let's get out of here.
I'm cold, I'm wet and I'm just plain scared.
I'm here.
There's nothing to worry about.
# How do you do, I # # See you've met my # # Faithful handyman # # He's just a little broke down # # 'Cause when you knocked # # He thought you were the candyman # # Don't get strung out # # By the way I look # # Don't judge a book by its cover # # I'm not much of a girl # # By the light of day # # But by night I'm one hell of a lover # # I'm just a sweet transvestite # # From sensational # # Transylvania # # Why don't you stay for the night # Night.
- # Or maybe a bite # - Bite.
# I could show you my favorite obsession # # I've been makin' a man # # With blond hair and a tan # # And he's good for relieving my tension # # I'm just a sweet transvestite # # Sweet transvestite # # From sensational Transylvania # # Hey, hey # # I'm just a sweet transvestite # # Sweet transvestite # # From sensational # # Transylvania # # So come up to the lab # # And see what's on the slab # # I see you shiver with antici-# - # Pation # - Pation! # But maybe the rain # # Isn't really to blame # # So I'll remove the cause # # But not the symptom ## Whoo! Whoo! Now, that's an entrance.
Mr.
Director- I take that wall out right? You're two acts early, Carl.
You're supposed to bust through the dinner party scene.
Oh.
Well, actually, I was sort of feeling my entrance in this scene.
Such good, good, interesting impulses.
- Oh! - Bravo, Carl.
Bravo.
- Will? Hey, I got your note you wanted to see me.
We have a problem with the show.
It's Carl.
Really? I thought he was perfect.
I agree, but, uh- What he said during his audition- It's haunted me.
He's right.
Some of these parts are just too adult for kids to play.
Oh.
Yeah, I have to agree, Will.
Especially Sam.
Sam.
Right.
He seems so uncomfortable.
- Oh, yeah.
- So I spoke with him.
Is there something wrong with my body? Your body's fine, Sam, but, frankly I think the role's a little too risque for a student.
I did feel kind of embarrassed.
Who's gonna play Rocky? - I guess I have to.
- I'm- I'm sorry? I figured if Carl can play Eddie then I can play Rocky.
Thing is, I'm not as familiar with the libretto as you are and I can really use your help rehearsing.
Are you sure that's a good idea? I mean, you'll be a great Rocky.
You'll look really, really great- healthy.
- But, I mean, you're a teacher.
- Which is why I should do it.
- It would give the show a little more credibility, you know? - Oh.
So think you could help me out? I mean, I have to have "Touch-A, Touch Me" down by rehearsal tomorrow.
- Yeah, okay.
- Okay? Um- I guess if you wanna start over there - and I will start here.
- Right.
Good, good, good.
Good.
So let's just imagine that we're all alone in Frank-N-Furter's laboratory.
- Alone.
- Okay.
# I was feelin' done in # # Couldn't win # # I'd only ever kissed before # - You mean she? - Uh-huh.
# I felt there's no use getting # # Into heavy sweating # # It only leads to trouble # # And bad fretting # # Now all I want to know # # Is how to go # # I've tasted blood and I want more # # More, more, more # # I'll put up no resistance # # I want to stay the distance # # I've got an itch to scratch # # I need assistance # # Touch-a, touch-a, touch-a Touch me # # I wanna be dirty # # Thrill me, chill me, fulfill me # # Creature of the night # # Then if anything shows # # While you pose # # I'll oil you up and drop you down # # Down, down, down # # And that's just one small fraction # - # Of the main attraction # - # Oh # - # I want a friendly man # - Oh! # And I need action # # Touch-a, touch-a, touch-a Touch me # # I wanna be dirty # # Thrill me, chill me, fulfill me # # Creature of the night # # Touch-a, touch-a, touch-a Touch me # # I wanna be dirty # # Thrill me, chill me, fulfill me # # Creature of the night # # Oh, touch-a, touch-a, touch-a Touch me # Oh! # I wanna be dirty # # Thrill me, chill me Fulfill me # # Creature of the night # Creature of the night.
Creature of the night.
Creature of the night.
Creature of the night? Creature of the night.
# Creature of the night # Creature of the night.
# Creature of the night ## - Um- - Uh- - Hi.
Uh- - Hi.
Yeah.
Whoa! - I would have had it.
- Yeah, sure.
- Where you been? You're late.
- Sorry.
I spaced.
I'm not playing Rocky anymore.
You're kidding.
Who is? Mr.
Schue.
I totally blew this.
I shouldn't have made all those demands about my costume.
I just feel fat, like I had rolls hanging over those gold shorts.
But you're in perfect shape, dude.
Wait.
Since I said I'm uncomfortable in the tighty-whiteys - does that mean I'm gonna get replaced? - No.
Don't worry about that.
The Brad part isn't about looking hot.
It's about being confident in who you are and how you look no matter how "douche-y" you are.
That guy's totally cool with being uncool.
Yeah, I'm definitely not there.
Uh, I actually started showering with my shirt on.
Stop knocking yourself out.
Just be you, and the sexy will flow through.
Yeah.
Yeah, you're right.
I don't need to hide behind my muscles like you do.
Awesome.
I think.
Are you insulting me? Where you going? To show everyone how hot and sexy I am.
Oh, wow.
Damn those Cool Ranch Doritos.
Eddie? I've seen him.
Eddie? What do you know of Eddie, Dr.
Scott? I happen to know a great deal about a lot of things.
You see, Eddie happens to be my nephew.
- This play is terrible.
Finn's line.
Dr.
Scott! - Janet! - Dr.
Scott.
- Finn's line.
Janet.
- I'm so bored I just fell into a microsleep.
Brad! - Rocky.
- Janet.
- Dr.
Scott.
- Still being Finn.
Janet! - Brad! - None of this is plausible.
- Rocky.
- - Janet.
- Dr.
Scott.
- Finn's line.
Janet! - Brad! Rocky.
This play has incredible pacing problems.
Mr.
Schue, it is pointless to rehearse this scene without Finn.
We don't have a choice.
He's late, and he's not answering his phone.
We gotta get this timing down, guys.
And would you please stop interjecting your opinions, Sue? Opinions? These are my rewrites.
William! I'd like to see you in my office, please.
Suspended? For what? I sort of walked down the hall in my Rocky Horror costume.
Oh, my- Whoa! Nice panties, Baby Huey.
Hey, my grandpa Murray called.
He wants his boxers back.
Why would you do that? I was trying to get comfortable in my costume.
You don't understand how hard it is for us guys to be exposed like that.
I just thought maybe it would help me feel hot enough to get up on stage and sing in my underwear.
I'm recommending one month suspension and summer school to make up for any lost class time.
You know, can we have a moment alone, please? You can't do this to him.
He was just coming to rehearsal in his costume.
That's not a crime.
Nine children have already signed up for after-school therapy.
I had to bring in a grief counselor.
Last year, when the Cheerios won the national championship Santana pantsed Brittany, and she was wearing a lot less than her underwear.
Neither of them were suspended.
That was in the middle of a celebration.
But there's still a precedent.
Huh? - Fine.
A warning.
- Thank you.
William.
To be honest, your motivations for doing this production are murky to me considering all that you are risking if something goes too far.
What are you saying? I'm saying you're welcome to continue with this but if you get any heat about it, I won't be able to protect you.
You're putting you and your Glee Club on the line and I want you to be sure that whatever you're doing it for is worth it.
- # There's a-# - Ho! Schuester- You messing with my woman? I thought we had a deal.
I- - I don't know what you're talking about.
- Yes, you do.
'Cause Em and I have a full-disclosure policy- Total honesty.
Something that allows us to have a little thing I like to call "intimacy"- Something you clearly know nothing about.
Look, we were just rehearsing.
Stop it, bro.
Man-to-man, you gave me your word.
- So what? You quitting the show? - No.
No, no, no.
Unlike you, I believe in the power of the arts.
I don't use 'em to pick up other guys' chicks.
Trick or treat? Oh, geez.
Becky, I forgot the Take Back the Night Club was going door-to-door this evening.
I want my chocolate bar.
I- I'm sorry.
I've been working so hard on Rocky Horror I forgot to buy candy.
Rocky Horror is an abomination.
What did you just say? That's what Coach Sue says in her tape.
It's in her office.
I'll show you.
So I went undercover to expose what your tax dollars are funding in our public schools in the name of the arts.
Now, I'm all about personal freedom.
I've publicly voiced my support for that lady who wants to marry her own sores but just because you're free to say whatever you want doesn't always mean you should.
Artists are free to push boundaries to make art but when pushing boundaries is their only aim the result is usually bad art.
There's a time and a place for everything and squeamishness about what we want our children exposed to is not the same as bigotry.
Freedom-loving adults are free to have an open, lively debate about what we want our society to be but let's not make our children fight the culture war for us.
They deserve a little better than that.
And that's how Sue sees it.
Get me some chocolate or I will cut you.
Sue, you set me up.
Hey, there, William.
Root through anyone's personal belongings lately? - When were you planning on airing that? - Opening night.
That's why I pretaped it.
Oh, I know you're furious, Will but do you honestly believe anything I said was unreasonable? Well- - No.
- There are limits, Will.
There is a line, and for reasons I suspect have nothing to do with your kids you crossed it.
You can't yell "fire" in a crowded theater and you can't expose kids to material like this- - not on the taxpayers' dime.
- Oh, please, Sue.
They have the Internet.
They are exposed.
Don't lead them to it.
Don't make it okay.
They're kids, and now more than ever, high school's a dangerous place and it's our job to guide 'em through it safely.
And we still get to torture them along the way.
It's a fabulous system.
You're right.
I- I'm pulling the show.
Wait.
What? Yeah, I'm canceling the show.
You were right.
I was totally wrong.
Shouldn't you wait until opening night? The kids worked so hard.
- I'm sorry, Sue.
- Hey, do it for the kids, Will.
I need that local Emmy, Will! Are you sure you want to cancel the whole thing? I never should have tried to put it on in the first place.
The reality is I only did all this to get close to you.
I guess love can make you do some crazy things.
You know? I'm sorry, Emma.
I promise to never abuse our feelings for each other again.
I mean, let's face it.
Carl is actually making you better.
And if I really love you I need to back off and accept the fact that at least for now being with him is the best thing for you.
So what are you gonna tell the kids? I want to apologize for putting you guys through all this- - Particularly Finn and Sam.
- It's cool, Mr.
Schue.
I'm sure the teasing will die down by the time my 10th reunion rolls around.
And I got asked to be June in the Men of McKinley High calendar.
I'm happy for you.
But we still can't do the musical.
Look, I was wrong.
Rocky Horror isn't about pushing boundaries or making an audience accept a certain rebellious point of view.
Those were my reasons for doing it and they aren't worth risking what we have here.
And when I was younger and they started midnight shows of Rocky Horror it wasn't for envelope pushers.
It was for outcasts- People on the fringes who had no place left to go but were searching for someplace- anyplace- where they felt like they belonged.
Sound familiar? The truth is, with that perspective Rocky Horror is the perfect show for this club.
Then why aren't we putting it on? We're still gonna perform Rocky Horror.
We're just not doing it for an audience.
We're doing it for ourselves.
We're doing it for ourselves.
# It's astounding # # Time is fleeting # # Madness # # Takes its toll # # But listen closely # # Not for very much longer # # I've got to keep control # # I remember # # Doing the Time Warp # # Drinking those moments when # # The blackness would hit me # # And the void would be calling # # Let's do the Time Warp again # # Let's do the Time Warp again # # It's just a jump to the left # # And then a step to the right # # Put your hands on your hips # # And bring your knees in tight # # But it's a pelvic thrust # # That really drives you insane # # Let's do the Time Warp again # # Let's do the Time Warp again # # It's so dreamy # # Oh, fantasy, free me # # So you can't see me # # No, not at all # # In another dimension # # With voyeuristic intentions # # Well secluded # # Oh, I'll see it all # # With a bit of a mind flip # # You're into the time slip # # And nothing # # Can ever be the same # # It's this subtle sensation # Ow! # Like you're under sedation # # Let's do the Time Warp again # # Let's do the Time Warp again # # Well, I was walking down the street Just having a think # # When a snake of a guy gave me an evil wink # # He shook-a me up He took me by surprise # # He had a pickup truck and the devil's eyes # # He stared at me and I felt a change # # Time meant nothing Never would again # # Let's do the Time Warp again # # Let's do the Time Warp again # # It's just a jump to the left # # And then a skip to the right # # Put your hands on your hips # # And bring your knees in tight # # But it's a pelvic thrust # # That really drives you insane # # Let's do the Time Warp again # # Let's do the Time Warp again ## Whoo! English - US - SDH