Gossip Girl (2021) s01e09 Episode Script

1
("BOYS WILL BE BOYS" BY DUA LIPA PLAYS)
GOSSIP GIRL: Look alive, followers.
It's a new day, and I, for
one, woke up in a good mood.
So how about we play a
game? Two truths and a lie.
Sick intuition that they taught us ♪
So we won't freak out ♪
GOSSIP GIRL: One, you have control
over the things that
matter in your life.
We smile a way to ease the tension ♪
So it don't go south ♪
GOSSIP GIRL: Two, the world
is a generally forgiving place.
When will we stop saying things ♪
GOSSIP GIRL: And three, no matter what,
in the end, the truth will set you free.
The answer? I cheated. They're all lies.
Because the real truth is
there's no such thing as truth.
Boys will be boys will be ♪
Boys will be boys ♪
But girls will be women ♪
GOSSIP GIRL: There's what
you believe, what I perceive,
and what history remembers.
Everything else? A mystery.
The grey area. A drawn game.
I can't find the words to say ♪
I know that there will be
a man around to save the day ♪
And that was sarcasm ♪
In case you needed it mansplained ♪
GOSSIP GIRL: And perhaps no one
knows the truth about the truth
more than Tribeca's least wanted
(NOTIFICATION DING)
When will we stop saying things ♪
'Cause they're all listening? ♪
GOSSIP GIRL: Last seen supporting
Daddy DJ's big night out,
our influential ingenue remains
notably silent in the face
- of her father's gray areas.
- (JULIEN CALLOWAY GASPS)
GOSSIP GIRL: Perhaps she's
more complicit than we think.
Because if she is taking a stand,
- it's to plead the fifth.
- (BREATHES HEAVILY)
But you can only stay
undecided for so long
before history decides for
you, whether you like it or not.
And as far as you're concerned?
KATE KELLER: Oh, God, it's SantaCon.
GOSSIP GIRL: I'm history.
The record. Your karma.
Is that Gossip Girl?
I, uh, left my phone at home. Can I see?
GOSSIP GIRL: So true
believers, nay-sayers,
and everyone in between,
watch this space.
You may not like what I have to say,
but karma's that bitch. And so am I.
You've got to be fucking
Kidding, right?
- It's speculation. Nothing more.
- It's sexual assault!
Even if it is, and I
am not saying it isn't,
there's no proof.
It's not involuntary intoxication.
These women admit in these
texts that they willingly drank.
Imperfect consent, such as it is,
is not a criminal act.
(SCOFFS) Not criminal? So what,
it's just a misunderstanding?
What would make it a criminal act?
NANCY VOGEL: If it crossed the line
from intoxication to incapacitation.
Do you know if any of these
women were unconscious
The texts literally say
that they don't remember.
So, if they can't remember
consenting, then
how can anybody say that they did?
Who is to say they didn't?
The fact is, while
these morning-after texts
offer a reason to believe
your father may have taken advantage
of multiple women years ago,
only one of them has come forward
claiming as such.
One, as it turns out,
who lied about that claim.
To protect a higher-profile victim.
Potential victim.
And none of these other
women have come forward.
Not even
this alleged higher-profile
potential victim.
You want my advice?
NICK LOTT: That's why we're here, Nance.
We wanna know the best
course of action for Julien.
You wait, you do nothing,
and you make sure that this
doesn't fall into the wrong hands.
Shouldn't she try to get ahead of it?
You know, tell somebody what she knows?
Nobody even knows
about these other women.
And it's not your place
to tell. It's theirs.
And until these other
women come forward,
there is nothing you can do.
I could post a statement!
NANCY: Anything that
you say in a public forum
will be turned around on you.
Okay? I highly suggest radio silence.
Just watch it play out, and don't
put yourself in the middle of it.
Aren't I already in the middle of it?
I know this is a lot, but
it's for your ultimate good.
- NICK: Trust the process.
- No statements. No posts.
Not online. Not in person.
But I have to go to school!
I have classes! I have a test!
This is a crisis. The
school will understand.
Listen, though
I know that it doesn't feel like
it right now, justice is moving.
And if what you believe
happened to those women
did happen to those women,
they are watching this
all play out right now.
(SOFT PIANO MUSIC PLAYS)
And just because they've
yet to come forward
doesn't mean they won't.
It just takes time.
(MUSIC FADES)
(HURRIED MUSIC PLAYS)
Karma's that bitch? Really, Scott?
What makes you think that little
piece of poetic justice was me?
There's a sports metaphor.
SCOTT KOVACS: I did a little rewrite.
The crew's so blah and
academic. It needed a zhuzh.
So I repurposed an old
post from the aughts.
I thought you'd like the initiative.
You thought an English
teacher would like plagiarism?
I changed some words!
The part about the Waldorf
person wouldn't make sense.
I turned the comments
back on, by the way.
Part of what makes America great
is that we all have a voice
to troll each other with.
Did you run all the way here?
No, I spent my paycheck on
an Uber so I could witness
first-hand you taking a
sledgehammer to the thing
I care most deeply about.
I know what you care
about and it isn't this.
What? Oh, ew! Scott, no!
You still want a piece.
Now that I'm back in your
orbit, I'm on your mind.
Even after I ghosted you.
I ghosted you!
- Hmm
- And I care about Gossip Girl.
I know I got voted off
the island, okay? I get it.
I got too close, I have opinions,
but what you posted this
morning about an influencer
possibly being complicit
in her dad's illicit issues
was wrong and dangerous.
You could ruin a kid's life.
So what? She'll buy a new one.
- Wow!
- You know what your problem is?
That I'm an actual human being
and not a sentient jockstrap?
That you're here trying
to convince yourself
you're anything more than
six degrees of Perez Hilton.
You don't care about these
kids any more than I do!
You just love the rush.
I know it, and you know it.
We're making gossip great again, Keller.
And you are benched for the season.
Now if you don't mind,
I have to hose my
balls off before sex ed.
- (SCREAMS)
- STUDENT: Sorry!
Oh. Morning.
Uh, I thought you said no one was home.
You needed me to hand off Michael Caine
to the private plane people.
No that happened last week.
- MAX WOLFE: Bri-ssant?
- They're brioche croissants.
Sure.
Oof. Aw, this is nice, right?
Three-top back together again?
Honey, we know what you're doing.
I don't know what you mean.
Well, first, it was
Rocky's surprise party
Okay, so I was off by a few months.
And the false alarm of
Pops throwing his back out
- during an installation?
- No, no. No, I simply misheard.
Lilac and sacroiliac,
they're I mean, they're
they're practically homonyms.
(CHUCKLES) Look, Max,
we know the separation's
been tough on you.
It's been hard on all of us.
The point is, Max, it's got
to stop. You can't force it.
These things, they take time. (SIGHS)
And your dad and I, we're just
we're on different paths now.
(CLEARS THROAT) Well,
I'd better get to work.
- I, uh, can't be late.
- You're literally your own boss.
Yeah, and I am an absolute tyrant.
I get you're disappointed,
but please understand
that your dad and I
agree on one thing
always and forever, our love for you.
ROY: True.
I'll see you soon.
Ooh, here.
Take these extra to Julien. Ay!
You know, all that trauma
The girl needs to eat.
(DRAMATIC MUSIC PLAYS)
What are you doing here?
How did you find us?
I just wanna talk.
Jules, let's go.
It's all right, Z. They have to speak.
Okay, we'll be in the lobby.
Aki Menzies, Road Rash
King of the Upper East Side.
(SIGHS) Rex Huntington,
Queen of doubles tennis!
Oh, you noticed.
- What's up?
- I just wanted to say welcome to the club.
I know coming out can be
rough, and with your dad,
I can't even imagine.
Yeah, it's, uh it's been a journey.
Now that you've arrived,
a question I've always wanted to ask
What kind of risky skateboard
trick makes you get a scar
right here?
I got my arm stuck in a
pool table when I was five.
I wish I could credit it to
something gnarlier, but
Okay. I'm not actually
talking about scars. Obvi.
- You just were.
- Wow.
You really don't get it?
I'm trying to ask you out.
I'm not single.
Your straight side might not be,
but your gay side very much is.
It doesn't work like that.
Dude, you're queer now.
It works however you want it to
which is why I'm gonna
give you my number
in case you're up for
it, whatever "it" may be.
And yes, I'd totally do
that on the first date.
- Rex!
- Okay, okay. (CHUCKLES)
If it seems like I'm being
a bit aggressive, it's
it's because I like you.
- (INDISTINCT CHATTER)
- Always have.
And that doesn't have to
mean anything more than that.
If you ever need a a
queer ear or a gay friend,
an old-fashioned date, and
or the best head of your life,
you know where to find me.
She didn't post it.
- Post what?
- My parents' tax returns.
(EXHALES HEAVILY) I'm
pretty sure Gossip Girl
has other things on her mind.
Like what? Like
non-stop trolling Julien?
- Did you talk to her?
- Who talks to Gossip Girl?
No, Julien!
No, I didn't. I, uh
She does not want to hear from me.
Your girlfriend made that very clear.
Do you think Gossip Girl's,
like, holding it back
and waiting for all this
Davis shit to blow over?
"Davis shit"? I know you care about her,
but the way you're
talking, it doesn't seem
No. Look. I care about her too much, Ak.
And I I need something
to distract myself,
like my parents, otherwise I'll dissolve
into a million Thanos specks
- and disappear forever.
- (SCOFFS)
Well, I hate to admit it, but
Gossip Girl is pretty smart
for leaning into this Davis stuff.
It's fucked, but
everyone's talking about it.
- Yeah.
- A lot more than they would tax evasion.
Hey, it's been days and no posts.
- Has anyone heard from JC?
- Zero intel.
Audrey said they crashed at Zoya's.
What? Really? Wait! Wh
Wh What else did she say?
You can ask her yourself.
(SIGHS) Hi. Hello. Hello. Hello.
Okay. So Julien is fine.
She appreciates everyone
reaching out, but
she just needs a minute right now.
- A minute to do what?
- Absolutely nothing.
Okay? Her lawyer said
she needs to cut it out.
No posts, no no interviews,
and not even school right now, so
If she stays silent too much longer,
people are going to actually believe
- that she's been in on this daddy drama.
- They already think that.
The head of the Pacific
Northwest Chapter
of the Jul-lions
called her a "hags-been"
and dropped off our hold-down-the-fort
Houseparty this morning.
You know that's not reality, right?
This is reality.
And what Julien needs right
now is her support system,
not spin doctors.
Consider her off-grid
until further notice.
(SCHOOL BELL RINGS)
Is there anything I can do?
AUDREY HOPE: I'm sorry.
I've been rude to you lately.
But honestly, Obie,
if she needs you, she's
gonna reach out. I promise.
Fine. Peace, bro.
(INDISTINCT CHATTER)
- (KISSES) Hi.
- Missed you last night.
Missed you too.
(CELL PHONE CHIMES)
- Who were you texting?
- Oh. Uh
Just that kid Rex, the
senior with the freckles.
I am well aware of Rex Huntington.
Yeah, he just put his number
in my phone this morning.
- No big deal, right?
- You think he's hot?
He sends one eggplant emoji, and
suddenly I'm obsessed with him?
Well, he also said, um
Wow! Okay, I did not realize
you could even do that!
So, what? Do you wanna hook up with him?
No! No, of course not! I
Well, maybe if things
were different, but
No, actually, no. I love
you, and I'm with you.
No one said anything
about love, babe. Okay?
I'm a girl who is dating
a guy who also likes guys.
So, as a guy who likes guys,
Rex Huntington, hot or not?
Uh
- AUDREY: Hmm?
- Hot. Okay. Very hot.
Uh I've thought about
him once or twice when I
Okay, thank you. See? We can do this.
- What are you doing?
- Figuring it out. Together.
- Figuring what out?
- Our modern relationship.
Ah! You need a third? I'm right here.
Thank you, but like I said
before, we're done with that.
- (MESSAGE SENT BEEP)
- Again, I'm right here.
Oh, Rex? Oh, okay! Hope
you like to watch, Hope.
Not really up for what you have.
Well, it's not for me. It's for Aki.
We're trying something
new with someone new.
Why do you smell like butter?
Dad. He demanded that
I ply JC full of carbs.
Oh, well, she's not coming in, so
Do you want one?
- AUDREY: Um
- MAX: Uh (CHUCKLES)
(AUDREY MOANS)
(AUDREY CHUCKLES)
Uh Well, if the whole
Rex thing doesn't pan out
He will, but thanks
for the repeated offer.
And thanks for whatever that is.
- If you're not gonna say any
- I didn't do it. I didn't.
- But that night, you
- I was so freaked out
I might lose everything, I
I don't even remember what I said.
So you thought coming here this morning
and saying "I didn't do
it" was the way to go?
What you don't understand,
Jules, is when I say
I didn't do it, I'm saying
I didn't do it on purpose.
So, I'm not saying
those women are lying.
If they feel I took advantage
of them, that means I did.
But I didn't mean to. I
did I didn't think I was.
- That doesn't make it okay.
- I don't wanna make it okay.
I will take part in any
investigation that needs to happen
if someone comes forward. No one has.
So maybe, just maybe
what if those texts weren't
sent in fear or as accusation?
What if those women didn't
feel taken advantage of?
Is that possible too?
But Riley
I'm here and ready to listen
when she's ready to talk.
I just hope that you'll
be by my side as I do it.
I don't mind losing
everything if I deserve it,
but I can't lose you.
- Do something!
- I can't.
- NICK: This is between them.
- ZOYA LOTT: But
But he's still her father, Z.
GOSSIP GIRL: Spotted!
Alleged DJ Daddy Devious
with his as-yet-undeclared daughter.
From this long lens, it's hard to tell
if this is a showdown or
a secret strategy sesh.
Until we have proof,
we won't know what
side Julien stands on.
But for now, this picture
tells a bunch of words.
- (BOTH SIGH)
- (SOFT PIANO MUSIC PLAYS)
You're not supposed to
be on your phones in here.
STUDENT: Sorry, Miss
Keller. It's my mom.
Cut the crap, Rachel.
I know it's Gossip Girl.
Can I see it?
"A bunch of words"?
- (MUSIC CONCLUDES)
- (INDISTINCT CHATTER)
- Jesus! What are you, a ninja?
- I trusted you, Jordan.
You're angry, understandably,
but I'm on your side.
Which side is that? The back
one you repeatedly stabbed?
Hear me out. The Davis thing,
your hesitation to post it,
it got them all worked up.
So you decided to turn
on your best friend?
You're Wait, you think you're
Well, I guess you are.
Wow. That's sad. (INHALES)
Anyway, I only stayed in
so that I could help you.
They're out of control.
But if I'm still in, on their side,
I can try to keep them in check,
stop them from doing
any irreparable harm.
So what, you're my
"man on the inside" now?
- (WHISPERS) You took their side.
- For appearances. Nothing more.
You need to get Scott
to leave Julien alone.
- This morning's post
- JORDAN GLASSBERG: Was brutal.
It's gone to his head, for sure.
But it's not like it didn't
go to yours a little too.
(STUTTERS) And when it did,
you talked me out of it!
So, work some of that magic
on him before he dismantles
everything we've built
by posting conjecture,
- lies, and libel!
- I'll try,
but a guy like that doesn't
tend to listen to guys like me.
Bet you could change his mind.
You have a way with words.
He's not interested in
hearing them. Believe me.
But you're so relentless.
Scott and I slept together, okay?
A mistake so uneventful
it doesn't even warrant
- the term "one-night stand."
- When?
No, I don't wanna know.
(GASPS) I can't believe
Well, yeah. I guess even I would.
Just talk to him, okay?
If you can't forgive me,
that's your prerogative!
Godspeed, Kate!
("BUNNY IS A RIDER" BY
CAROLINE POLACHEK PLAYS)
Bunny is a rider ♪
Satellite can't find her ♪
- Flat white?
- (SONG CONTINUES OVER RADIO)
- I didn't order that.
- You usually do.
True, but a.m. only.
Permission to caffeinate you after two?
Granted.
Hey, I don't mean to pry, but,
um don't you know that guy?
Oh, yeah. Yes.
He is on his first first
date in a lot of years,
and so I'm just here to well
- Lurk?
- Lurk?
I'm creating ambiance, and you know it.
- I'll let it slide.
- Oh, yeah?
- This time.
- (CHUCKLING) This time.
If you ever want to,
um, lurk together
- He's late.
- What?
This is weird. Maybe we should go?
Check in on Jules?
As if I'm not checking in
on her every ten minutes?
She's at home now,
and she wants to meet up
for dinner later, but
in the meantime
What's that?
Oh. (CHUCKLES) Just
me getting asked out.
- By who?
- By the barista.
- Him?
- (SCOFFS)
Why should you be the
only one getting attention?
(EXHALES THROUGH NOSE)
Wait, um Come here.
Is this, like, a two-way street, or
You wanna go out with someone else?
- I mean, you are.
- 'Cause you told me to.
Because I don't want you to lock
a part of yourself away for me.
Well, what part of yourself is
locked away by just dating me?
Rex has something you
literally can't provide.
I have exactly what Mr.
Alt Milk over there has.
Maybe not exactly, Aki, but
I guess if that's how
you feel, then Oh.
- Was this a bad idea?
- AUDREY: Not for me.
Of course. I wouldn't want
to deny your happiness.
Nor I yours.
Have fun. I'm gonna get another refill.
I, uh, just wanted to
apologize for this morning.
I shouldn't be meddling. I should, uh
(ROMANTIC MUSIC PLAYS)
Should let you have time.
Max! I thought you delivered
for God's Love on Fridays.
No, I rescheduled.
This is Raul.
Do you two work together?
Not yet.
Raul is a new friend.
We, uh (SOFT CHUCKLE)
(SMACKS LIPS, INHALES) We had lunch.
And now you're having drinks.
(CLEARS THROAT) Would you
excuse us for a moment?
Of course. I'll grab some water.
- Nice to meet you, Max.
- Hmm.
(WHISPERS) Who the fuck is that?
- You know exactly who that is, Max.
- MAX: Luckily, I don't.
Because in this city,
in that demographic,
there's a 70 percent
chance that I could have,
and then how would you
have felt about that?
Raul is a friend. Nothing more.
For now. So, is this what
being on a different path
than Pops means?
Does he know you're on this path?
Do Do you think that
you should be on this path?
You know that your dad and
I are presently not together.
Yes, but I did not think
that it would be you pursuing
a new future, either!
He and I have agreed
to see other people.
You've not even given Pops a
chance to make things right.
No, honey. No. This isn't
something to make right.
Some people stay their
whole lives together
in that uncomfortable place, and
your dad and I, we are not
going to do that to one another.
I see that.
You don't have to leave.
Uh Raul and I can go.
No, no, no, no, no. Don't
worry. The house is yours.
(PIANO TUNE PLAYS)
- (PHONE RINGING)
- ROY: Hey, there.
Did you know that Dad's seeing someone?
(SIGHS) He's allowed to
do whatever he wants, Max.
I only asked that I
not be told about it.
And now I have been.
Pops, I'm really fucking this all up.
It was already fucked up, son.
This limbo's killing me.
Hey, uh (EXHALES)
Wanna come with me on a job right now?
JULIEN: What are you doing?
I didn't wanna disturb you.
I was just looking for the old
phone to give to the lawyers.
- To give to them, or
- Or what?
Or delete what's on it?
You think this proves I'm guilty?
This proves I'm innocent.
My lawyers need it
to show that I was dating those women,
not targeting them.
- You still don't believe me.
- You're just trying
to get in my head and
manipulate what I think!
DAVIS CALLOWAY: That is not
what I'm trying to do at all.
Do you have any idea what could happen
if this phone fell into the wrong hands?
If you're innocent, why
would that scare you?
If everything you said
is true, it wouldn't.
(INHALES DEEPLY, EXHALES)
Keep it.
(EXHALES SHARPLY)
Hey. How you doing?
Just
I wanna call her, but
I just wanna give her her space.
But I really wanna call her.
I just wanna make sure she's okay.
I know you do.
But she'll call if she's not.
The gray areas in life?
I wish I could say they
get easier to navigate
as you get older
but you kinda just get used to them.
Why do you allow yourself
to get used to them?
Because when things get complicated,
sometimes they stay that way.
No. Things get complicated when
people aren't honest with each other.
And those gray areas are
just a great place to hide.
The kind of people that hide in them
are those who feel they
are guilty about something.
(ZOYA EXHALES HEAVILY)
(CELL PHONE RINGING)
Hey! Are you okay?
(INHALES) Yeah.
JULIEN: I can't just wait around
for these women to come forward.
I need to know the truth.
I think I need your help.
(DRAMATIC MUSIC PLAYS)
FRAT SANTA: Oh, man, I
can't wait to get fucked up,
man (LAUGHS)
Hey!
Why so serious?
It's SantaCon! Best day of the year!
Hey, do me a favor. Smile! (CHUCKLES)
Bitch! (LAUGHS)
Hey! Are you sure about this?
Best case, I find out what
my dad believes is true.
Worst case, what we fear is true.
That lawyer said there's
nothing anyone can do
unless one of the other
women comes forward,
but why would they?
They don't even know each other exists.
I just need one to tell me her truth.
And then the others will follow.
So I texted them.
So far, only one's gotten back to me.
Carmen Gruben, head of Music, Inc.
She agreed to meet, but
I don't wanna go alone.
You don't have to. I'm here.
We have to get past them.
(TENSE MUSIC PLAYS)
ZOYA: I found a driver we can trust.
Don't worry. This isn't weird
at all for me either. (CHUCKLES)
All right, we gotta
tuck down in the back.
Hi.
Hi.
- (INSERTS KEY)
- All right. Hold on.
STUDENT: Hey, I think that's Obie!
(CAMERA CLICKS)
Yeah, it is. You have to send it in.
(DRAMATIC MUSIC PLAYS)
SCOTT: What do you think? Is that him?
Sharon says yes. Tati's not sure.
Thanks for meeting me.
No worries, bro. Everything cool?
Ah! It's stupid, but, you know Kate.
I mean, I know you know Kate.
(STUTTERS) We all do.
You hit that too? Huh.
No, I didn't. But I
mean, I could, maybe.
Wow. That was gross. Forget I said that.
Anyway, um, I've been thinking.
I'm glad Kate's not involved,
because she was taking things too far.
And I'm on your side, obviously.
Uh But I had one tiny,
very tiny, critique. If I may?
Spit it out, soft boy.
Can't miss happy hour.
I Uh
I just wonder if, um, maybe
we're going in a little too hard
on certain students at Constance.
I appreciate the concern.
You're an emotional guy.
Real tied into your core. It's cool.
But this Davis stuff,
we're at the forefront.
All the other places, they're
looking to us to break it.
We cracked a mil 'cause of this story.
Do you realize where that puts us?
The big time, my man.
Sure, okay, fine.
But what if this reporting
hurts his daughter?
She didn't do anything.
She's just his kid.
Ever seen someone run who wasn't guilty?
JC's our 21st-century OJ.
If we don't catch
her, someone else will.
We don't have a choice.
If you don't like it, you could
always give me your fob and
opt out.
(WHISPERS) Ow.
(MUSIC CONCLUDES)
My foam's almost milk again.
Is that a euphemism?
We've been here a long time.
(CHUCKLES) Yeah, uh,
we have. You're right.
Can I get you another one?
If you are trying to
put me in cardiac arrest,
might I suggest a more fun way to do it?
- You wanna get out of here?
- Yes.
One sec.
What are you still doing here?
I'm just waiting for Jamison to get off.
Is that on the table?
Get off work!
Which he's about to. He's just
getting his things right now.
So you are planning on leaving?
- Are you?
- I don't know.
Why do I feel like you're
waiting for me to make a move
so then you can make
a move? I'm confused.
'Cause that's exactly what I'm doing!
This is what you wanted, isn't it?
AKI MENZIES: I'm not sure!
I feel like we're in a John Woo movie
when we're pointing guns
at each other's heads!
That is very much
not an allusion that
resonates with me in any way.
So, where we going?
I don't know! Aki, any suggestions?
I think you're good to
sit up now, you know?
Thanks.
I'm sorry that I never
responded to any of your texts.
Look, there's no reason
to apologize, all right?
I just want you to
know that I'm here for you.
Well, if I didn't know it before,
I definitely know it now.
Where are we going, exactly?
- Bemelmans.
- No way.
Yeah.
Is this a place I should know about?
So, it's this great old
bar that has live music.
It's in the Carlyle, and
Obie and I just used to go
there all the time as kids.
OBIE BERGMANN: Yeah. My parents
have this thing for the Beluga.
I used to go hang out in the kitchen
with the chefs and eat crème brûlée.
They'd even let me play with
the, uh the blowtorch.
Yeah, until Helena
realized you were missing
and made you write apology notes
to all the staff on napkins.
Yeah. That was a long time ago, though.
Still, it's a good memory.
(NOTIFICATION DINGS)
Oh, shit.
JULIEN: That sounds like
"Spotted. First Daughter of Disrepute
sneaking off on a road less traveled."
(VIOLIN MUSIC PLAYS)
GOSSIP GIRL: They say,
"If you know, you know."
So did you, JC?
- The people deserve an answer.
- (NOTIFICATION DINGS)
And since you won't provide one,
it's come to this. An open call.
First follower to
prove JC's offish stance
with Daddy Davis wins.
Extra points for following
a rule I hold close.
"If you don't have anything nice to say,
slide into my DMs and anon away."
He doesn't care about right or wrong.
He's obsessed with power, with winning.
Well, we just need to find
a tip that's more valuable,
that might make him lean
in a different direction.
So, is that like, your type?
- What? Jordan, that's
- I don't know why I said that.
(INHALES) Is there
anything I can do to help?
Just hang with me a bit?
Keep an eye out for any good tips
not related to Julien,
and I can find a spin
that makes them more alluring to Scott?
LUNA LA: (OVER PHONE)
GG's activated the city.
We were about to head
in for our treatments
and we heard the whole
staff talking about it.
Gossip Girl's not going to
stop until she finds you, JC.
Well, we have to make
sure that they don't.
But how? It's not like I blend in.
- Good luck. We're here for you.
- JULIEN: Thanks, girls.
(CELL PHONE RINGS)
- What's with all the Santas?
- SantaCon.
A con? They're all over the streets.
Shouldn't they be inside?
No, con actually doesn't stand
for convention in this case.
Yeah, more like contagion.
It's an unsanctioned holiday
for day-drinking frat boys
and day traders to play dress-up.
- Jesus!
- No! Santa!
ZOYA: Ew!
It was canceled last
year because of COVID,
which means it will
be extra bad this year.
They should hand out pepper
spray on every corner.
It'd be a good day to commit a crime.
Nobody could find you.
It is a crime. Against humanity.
I have an idea of how to keep
Gossip Girl off our tracks.
(FACETIME RINGTONE)
Dress up as Santa?
- I am not that basic.
- (CALL CONNECTS)
- LUNA: Hey there.
- Girls, I have a plan.
JULIEN: I'll get Audrey
and Ak, you get Max.
- Okay.
- Okay.
(FACETIME RINGTONE)
- AUDREY: Hello?
- AKI: Hey!
Does that make sense?
- Yes.
- Okay.
I'll send you my logins now.
Let Operation JC-And-Be-Seen commence.
Okay, um So, should
we divide and conquer?
- Split up?
- They don't know each other.
It'd be weird to ask
them to go together.
Baby, now I know you're playing dumb.
This isn't about me. This is about you.
I think you're scared.
We just came out of a weird place.
I don't wanna go back.
Maybe that weird place
existed so we could get here?
You.
You two are going to the LES. Good luck.
And you
I hope you like heights. Come on.
("NOTE TO SELF" BY JIM-E STACK PLAYS)
When you feel like
there ain't no way ♪
It's inevitable, baby ♪
Sometimes we just have to fall down ♪
Dim the lights and mute the sound ♪
Just let it knock you down ♪
Don't fight it ♪
Let it bring you back around ♪
Just let it knock you down ♪
Don't fight it ♪
Let it bring you ♪
Okay, we're on Ludlow.
Make sure you shoot out the window.
Ready for my casual, unplanned,
totally legit story face?
(CHUCKLES) Let the reverse
catfishing begin now.
(JULIEN SINGING)
Oh, my God.
Have you guys ever heard
Julien Calloway sing?
Oh, she would totally kill me
if she knew I was
recording this right now.
Yo, Rex. Stop that.
(MUSIC CONTINUES)
JORDAN: Kate! The kids
are up to something!
All these tips coming in
saying Julien's been
spotted all over the city.
Bianca said she's having
a party on the Great Lawn!
She's also at the
Guerlain Spa with Monet?
And at Dogpound with Zoya?
She doesn't need us fucking with GG.
Julien's ten steps ahead.
(MUSIC CONTINUES)
Just let it knock you down ♪
Don't fight it ♪
Let it bring you back around ♪
Just let it knock you down ♪
Don't fight it ♪
Let it bring you back around ♪
And here I thought we were gonna lurk.
Instead, shenanigans.
Sorry. I don't mean to kill the buzz.
Do shenanigans happen so often for you
- that they no longer excite you?
- (CELL PHONE CHIMES)
(AUDREY GASPS)
(GASPS) Yes!
What?
Nothing.
(ROMANTIC MUSIC PLAYS)
I've wanted to do that
all day. (CHUCKLES)
Was that okay?
It was exactly what I needed.
If this is how you're breaking
the official divorce to me,
Pops, it's a tad on the nose.
- Uh Take a good look around.
- Depressing.
This is the first garden I designed.
Oh.
- It's terrible.
- (CHUCKLES) Yeah.
This is where I grew up, Max.
You never took me here.
You know, when I was 12, I
asked my mom for a garden.
She hated that I liked flowers.
She wanted me to be a man.
Dress formally, become
a lawyer, marry up.
'Cause she'd married down, you know?
So when she said no,
I just did it anyway.
Yeah. She never came back here.
How the front looked,
that's all she cared about.
So I worked late at night,
early in the morning,
after she'd pass out drunk,
one of her Rotary Club meetings.
And in the summer, when
it when it bloomed
and she saw what I'd done,
instead of being taken by
it, which was my hope
she took me upstairs
and locked me in my room,
and she had this whole thing torn out
while I I watched from
that window right there.
(CHUCKLES)
And then her cold shoulder.
I did everything to get
her to love me again.
I denied who I was, I
I brought home girls
(MAX CHUCKLES)
Hell, and then, I I
even applied for law school.
And then, your dad came along.
He took me out of that darkness.
He never stopped blooming.
But the more vibrant he became,
the more I returned to the darkness.
I began to see all of his color
the way she saw my garden,
as a unsanctioned violation.
So, whatever time he needs
to take to try and forgive me,
I'll wait
which means you have
to wait too, I'm afraid.
I don't know for how long.
You know, he could wake up
next week and say, "Come home,"
or he could say, "That's it."
No.
The one thing I'll ask
is don't be like me.
Don't inherit this.
If you feel something,
even if it's hard to admit,
just say it.
(KISSES)
Can you take me back?
There are two people
I've got to talk to.
(SOFT PIANO MUSIC PLAYS)
What if I DMed the wrong Carmen?
No. You've been following
each other for years, okay?
- You got the right one.
- How do you know?
'Cause there she is.
I thought we'd be meeting alone
Oh, this is my sister.
You can trust her.
I was just keeping her
company till you arrived.
- I can
- CARMEN GRUBEN: Stay, please.
(SIGHS HEAVILY)
We just wanted you to know
that we think we have proof
that can help. Solid proof.
Messages, from an old phone.
Right, so you said.
I can see why this is a bit
confusing for you, Julien,
which is why I came today,
to tell you in person.
I have no memory
of what happened that
night with your dad.
But, in your text to
him, you said that
That I didn't remember. I wish I did.
Something always felt off
about that night, but
You're not alone.
There were more women.
A lot more.
And we thought if you could talk
with them and compare stories
It's not worth it to me.
I have a great career, a husband.
(CELL PHONE RINGING)
Excuse me. Hey.
OBIE: I guess someone
just spotted my car,
- 'cause a bunch of paps just showed up.
- Sorry to interrupt, Ms. Calloway,
but you wanted to know
if the media arrived?
I've just heard.
I have to go.
JULIEN: Uh Come with
us. We can keep talking.
(SIGHS)
I appreciate everything that
you're trying to do here.
I'm not the person to
help you. I'm sorry.
- How bad is it out there?
- OBIE: Real bad.
And getting worse.
I have an idea.
OBIE: Julien, get in.
OBIE: It worked. They're following me.
- Great.
- OBIE: What are you gonna do?
Get her off the street. I'll
text you where to meet us.
("NO HARD FEELINGS" BY
WOLF ALICE PLAYS ON RADIO)
There'll be no bad blood ♪
- Hey.
- Hey!
How was the walking tour
with Manhattan's most eligible frother?
Less steamy than you
might think, actually.
Um A one-kiss wonder.
- You kissed?
- You didn't?
I did, but I got
into my head about it.
Because you weren't there.
And I missed you.
And to be honest, I
don't think I'm the
open-relationship type of guy after all.
Really?
Because, um
I don't think I am either.
Well, thanks for giving me
permission to figure it all out.
Thanks for giving it to me too.
(PHONE CHIMES)
"Gossip Girl is going live"?
What?
- TEEN 1: That's Julien! Let's go!
- (CROWD CLAMORING)
- Come on! Julien!
- TEEN 2: Julien, right?
(INDISTINCT CHATTER)
Do you wanna sit?
'Cause my lap's wide open. (LAUGHS)
I'm joking! I'm joking.
Yeah, I'm a gentleman. Here.
Here. I made some space.
I made some space. Here, take a seat.
Here. Go ahead.
Watch it!
Hey. Just one more stop.
DANCING SANTA: Come
on, baby. Dance with me.
JULIEN: This is pointless.
Yo, we'll find somebody else to talk.
No, I mean, look around.
The world is filled
with entitled toxic men
who do whatever they want.
No fucking accountability.
And it's up to us to either
smile pretty when they ask
or run the other direction.
And if we, God forbid, push back,
there's going to be another man waiting
to tell us that we're overreacting
- or crying wolf!
- SANTA CRONY: Free hugs!
None of this is going
to make a difference.
Reaching out to Carmen,
to all the women,
- it was a mistake.
- SANTA CRONY: Free hugs!
It takes a whistle to silence a woman,
and an entire army to take down one man.
And you get a hug
- What the fuck is your problem?
- You are!
All of you are!
This is our stop. Let's go.
- (INDISTINCT CHATTER)
- (LAUGHTER)
(INDISTINCT CHATTER)
Oh, God! It's The Walking Dead out here.
Hey, watch it!
JULIEN: Even more handsy.
There's Obie! Go.
Hey! GG found the deepfakes.
And she sent a call to her followers
demanding live video of you.
- So, car's over here.
- ZOYA: Okay.
Uh Never mind.
Change of plans. We are
leaving the car behind.
- ZOYA: Where are we going?
- (OBIE STUTTERS)
Uh Wherever it is, we're on foot.
- Excuse me. Sorry.
- Whoa!
Hey, buddy.
I bet you fifty dollars that
you won't run around the block
with nothing but your hat on.
- Fifteen bucks?
- Uh Sure. Yeah.
- That works too.
- You're on.
Okay. Thank you.
Well, now we blend in.
Riley responded.
She wants to meet right now.
She wants to come forward
about what my dad did to her.
TEEN 1: There she is!
- It's Julien!
- TEEN 2: Right there, right there!
Right, let's go! Come on! Run!
(ALL CLAMORING)
- What's your problem, man?
- Okay!
- (SIGHS)
- (UNLOCKS PHONE)
(TAPPING)
(CELL PHONE RINGING)
(HURRIED MUSIC PLAYS)
Dad?
All this time, I thought
you were in your room,
and then I open Gossip Girl
and see you running down
a midtown street right
now, being chased.
- Where exactly are you?
- Don't be mad,
but we went to talk to one of the women,
and it actually worked out
because now we're on
the way to see Riley.
Riley?
As in the person Lauren
Thompson lied for?
ZOYA: Yes! I think she
wants to come forward.
She said she has proof.
Julien, over here! Julien!
- (CHAOTIC CHATTER)
- (MUSIC CONTINUES)
No, Zoya, you have to tell her not to.
- What?
- If Riley came forward right now,
she'd be proving Lauren lied.
Lauren would be sued
for libel and defamation.
So, what? You're saying we
let Davis get away with it?
No. You just need to
wait a little longer.
Dad, that's bullshit!
I agree. But I didn't make the rules.
Lauren lied, even if it
was for a good reason.
Proving that would just bring
the entire case into question
if she came forward.
Where are you going? I'll meet you.
JORDAN: This is so wrong.
He told people to track her like prey.
KATE: Gossip Girl is this close
to live streaming a snuff film.
- We have to do something.
- We have no game left to play.
Yes, we do.
- (HURRIED MUSIC CONTINUES)
- (PHONE RINGING)
Hi, Nick. I just saw
Gossip Girl. Insane.
I I wanted to check
in. Are the girls okay?
NICK: I think they're fine.
I'm picking them up at MoMa.
- I'm on my way now.
- KATE: I can come meet you.
NICK: Thank you. That'd be nice.
(MUSIC CONCLUDES)
Are you sure this is the best location?
Yeah, it's, um it's perfect.
As per Twitter, you
were already here today.
Nobody would think you'd come back.
That's her.
(EMOTIVE MUSIC PLAYS)
All right. You gonna be okay?
No.
I don't know why I like this place.
Most of the artists were
horrible people, but
somehow I still feel seen
by some of their work.
How long has it been? Six, seven years?
Something like that.
You look the same.
- So do you.
- Don't lie, girl.
I'm sitting on texts
between you and my dad
and my dad and other women and
I don't know what to
think about any of it.
I just wish there was a way to make up
for what happened to you somehow.
You have nothing to make up for.
Then why do I feel so guilty?
- How could I not know?
- He is your father.
Could you tell me what
I'd rather not. (CLEARS
THROAT) With you.
I understand.
JORDAN: It's Riley Love!
KATE: Give me your phone
and don't say a word.
- What are you doing?
- Going live as GG.
If I can show Julien's helping
her dad's survivors come forward,
it'll exonerate her once and for all.
We can't hear from here.
It's 2021. This shit
will be close-captioned
by lipreading tweens in no
more than a ten-second delay.
Look, I wanted to see you,
um, before I told anyone else.
I just I wanted to make
sure that you were gonna be okay
- if and when I come out and
- JULIEN: Oh, God!
My whole existence is
built on speaking my truth,
and now I'm here to ask
you not to speak yours.
Excuse me?
At least not yet.
What's happening?
- So you don't believe me?
- Of course I do.
I just want everyone else to, too.
I can't let Lauren take the fall for me.
I know.
But if you speak out now,
it will show Lauren lied.
That could ruin any case against my dad.
You could both be discredited,
and so would any future claim.
And then no one wins. Just him.
Ms. Love, if I could explain
("TRAITOR" BY OLIVIA RODRIGO PLAYS)
Brown guilty eyes and
little white lies, yeah ♪
I played dumb but I always knew ♪
- Any word?
- They're safe with Nick.
Come in.
I kept quiet so I could keep you ♪
Oh, great. I was hoping
you'd both be here.
Yeah. After the day we had, I
never wanna leave home again.
Day you had?
We went on dates with other people.
- Dates?
- AUDREY: (CHUCKLING) Yeah.
Hey, it wasn't all bad.
At least it enlightened us.
Mm-hmm. We learned all
we need is each other.
What's new, Wolfe?
You betrayed me ♪
(CELL PHONE CHIMES)
And I know that you'll
never feel sorry ♪
- GOSSIP GIRL: This just in.
- Oh, my God!
One forgotten face about
to hit the headlines
after a long absence.
(CELL PHONES CHIME)
- Loved you at your worst ♪
- (CELL PHONES CHIME)
- (CELL PHONES CHIME)
- But that didn't matter ♪
It took you two weeks
to go off and date her ♪
Guess you didn't cheat
but you're still a traitor ♪
GOSSIP GIRL: Looks
like this one-hit-wonder
is the true victim of
bad Dad's magic touch.
- But the real hot scoop?
- JORDAN: Kate, wait!
GOSSIP GIRL: Julien Calloway herself
is working to silence survivors.
At least we finally
know where she stands.
And no matter whose side you're on,
Julien's just proved it's all relative.
(KNOCKING ON DOOR)
'Cause I know that
you'll never feel sorry ♪
Mr. Calloway? Your
lawyer left this for you.
For the way I hurt, yeah ♪
You talked to her
when we were together ♪
You gave me your word
but that didn't matter ♪
GOSSIP GIRL: Maybe the truth
can set you free. But a lie?
- A lie will cost you everything.
- (CELL PHONE CHIMES)
But you're still ♪
You're still a traitor ♪
Yeah, you're still a traitor ♪
GOSSIP GIRL: XOXO, Gossip Girl.
Thought this through before I went ♪
And fell in love with you ♪
("TRAITOR" BY OLIVIA RODRIGO CONCLUDES)
(MAJOR CHORD PLAYS ON PIANO)
(HURRIED MUSIC PLAYS)
(MUSIC CONCLUDES)