Gunsmoke (1955) s01e22 Episode Script

Tap Day for Kitty

Gunsmoke starring James Arness as Matt Dillon.
It makes no difference if a man is young or old, wise or foolish, cowardly or brave.
Just one bullet from another's gun can put him in a shallow grave here on Boot Hill.
I'm Matt Dillon, United States marshal.
It's part of my job to stop the killings and keep the peace over there in Dodge and all along the frontier.
Sometimes it's not easy.
But it's what they pay me for, and easy or not, it's gotta be done.
Well, here you are, sir.
Hmmm.
Ain't that something? Yes, sir, that looks right good on you.
Just a little letting in here and taking out there, and it's gonna be just perfect.
Well, Nettie here can do that, I reckon.
You, ma'am? Never thought I'd wear one of these.
Well, now, how about an-? A-a vest to go with it? It's the latest fashion.
Ain't that a mite fancy for marrying clothes? Marrying? Oh, I didn't know.
I thought- She's just my housekeeper.
Oh, and I was just a-wondering why a- A rancher like yourself was buying these here store clothes.
Marrying, eh? Well, then you need a- A nice ring too.
Oh? It's custom.
Well, I- I reckon when the time comes, then.
I I ain't even found her yet.
That's what I come to town for.
Y-you come to Dodge to look for a wife? Yeah.
And soon as I find her, I'll be back for the ring and won't stay for the day or two.
Well, sir, you might find the pickings a mite slim around here.
Why, we ain't got many ladies of any description, least of all not your age.
Age don't matter.
Maybe not to you, but it might to them.
I'll get me a wife.
Don't you never fear about that.
A man's a fool not to know when he's well-off.
No more sass out of you.
Hello, marshal.
Hey, Kitty, you're missing the fun.
Hi, marshal.
Hello, Kate.
Olive.
You gotta hear this, Kitty.
What'd you say your name was, old man? My name is Nip Cullers.
Heh-heh! And I ain't so old.
I- I ain't a day over 60.
Or a day under.
How come you never been to Dodge before? I only just bought me a ranch down on Crooked Creek.
I never been in Kansas before.
I- I made all my money mining out in Arizona.
Money.
You hear that, Kate? He's rich.
You sure look rich.
Well, I'm- I'm bargaining with the storekeep to get me some new clothes.
A rich man don't need to bargain for a suit.
Can't you see the diamond rings and all? No, but I am rich, though.
And now my ma died- Your ma? That's right.
She was really old and crippled up.
And she died, and now I can get married.
You mean a man your age has never been married? Well, I was.
But she died, oh, a long, long time ago.
Don't you have any kids? Some.
All but one of 'em run off just as soon as they got big enough.
That's kinda sad.
Why do they have to laugh at him? I don't know.
So you come to Dodge lookin' for a wife, huh? There's women here.
I figured I'd look 'em over.
And take your pick, huh? What else? Even if you did have money, which you don't, I wouldn't marry an ugly old coot like you.
Me either.
I've seen water dogs I'd sooner cuddle.
I wouldn't get any closer to you than this to save me from hanging.
Olive, that's mean.
Well, look at him.
You don't have to talk to him like that.
Oh, Kitty.
The old fool's crazy.
He's not doing you any harm.
Oh, no.
No, no.
I don't mean to do no harm.
But I'm gonna find me a wife.
You don't need a wife, old man.
You need a bell around your neck and one leg tied up.
That's enough.
Huh? You and Kate get outta here and leave him alone.
Since when did you start to run things around here? You ever see me fight? Kitty.
Take it easy, now.
You girls'll look like scarecrows when I'm through with you.
Now get out! Oh, wait a minute, Kitty.
We didn't mean anything.
Then get away from this table.
All right.
All right.
I'm going.
You too, Kate.
Sure.
We didn't wanna talk to him anyway.
You ought to forgive them, mister.
They learn all that talk from cowboys and such that come in here.
They said your name was Kitty.
That's right.
You're nice, Miss Kitty.
Well, sometimes a woman can handle women better than a man can.
You're pretty too.
Yeah, well Look, Nip, you- You better stay outta here.
You go look for a wife someplace else.
Oh, I don't have to.
No? Not now.
I found one.
Yeah? You.
Me? Sure.
Oh, I didn't want either of them two, I-I was just looking them over.
But I like you fine.
You'll make me a good wife.
You shut up, mister.
Ahem.
Sorry.
Look, Nip, don't- Don't go getting any ideas.
Oh, it's all right, Kitty.
Now, I'll take care of everything.
It'll take me a day or two, but I'll be back.
Hey, wait.
We'll get married just as soon as I can arrange everything.
You'll see.
I'll be back.
Matt! Well, looks like you got yourself into something, Kitty.
Well Try to be nice to somebody and do a good deed, and see what happens.
It's not funny.
I think he means it.
Well, he certainly was positive enough.
Miss Kitty.
Reverend.
Miss Kitty, I was delighted to hear the news.
Simply delighted.
News? Especially since you and Mr.
Cullers have chosen me to perform the ceremony tomorrow.
I must admit I was rather surprised.
It's a celebration.
You bet.
Hee-hee! A man don't get married every day, especially at your age.
Yeah, I sure envy that Kitty.
Well, come on, now.
Everybody wash down the dust.
Nip Cullers is buying.
It's a celebration.
I was just coming for you.
You gotta do something.
What's the matter, Kitty? Cullers in there.
He's serious, Matt, he's even set up a wedding.
You've gotta help me.
Well, let's go in.
Kitty.
Well, now.
Here comes the bride.
Ha-ha! Kitty.
Hoss, set up more drinks.
Never mind, Sam.
Well, hello, marshal.
You'll come to the wedding too.
Everybody's invited.
Well, Cullers, Kitty said she doesn't wanna marry you.
Oh, well, you know how women are, marshal.
Kind of bashful-like.
Ha! Kitty's not a bashful woman, Cullers.
She just doesn't wanna marry you.
She can't back out now.
Back out? Matt, there's no use talkin' to him.
I decided on her, and that's how it's gotta be.
I'm comin' by for her at noon tomorrow, and we're gonna get churched.
You come by for me at noon tomorrow or any other time, and I'll be waitin' for you with a shotgun to blow your head off.
I mean it.
That ain't no way to talk, Kitty.
The talking's over, Cullers.
You get outta town right now, or I'm gonna have to lock you up.
Lock me up? In jail.
Until you learn to quit bothering people.
Well, now, who ever heard of a man going to jail for wanting to get married? I'm not gonna argue with you, Cullers.
Take your choice, right now.
I-I don't wanna go to jail.
All right, get out.
Well All right.
I will.
Now, don't you worry, Kitty.
I'll be back.
And I'll be waiting with a shotgun.
I come to Dodge to get me a wife.
She's it.
Ain't no man gonna stand in my way.
I am.
Then I got a right to kill you, marshal.
Any man would somebody come between him and his woman.
I'll give you till dark to get out of Dodge, Cullers.
If I see you around after that, I'm gonna arrest you.
I ain't no gunslinger, marshal.
I can't draw with you at 20 paces.
But I can use a rifle.
And I will.
I'll shoot you in the back if I gotta.
So you better watch every corner, every window, every door.
'Cause I'll be there.
Somewhere.
I'll get you.
You got till dark, Cullers.
If I see you after that, I'll be coming for you.
You come, I'll kill you.
He's crazy.
He's really crazy.
Yeah.
Yeah, I think you're right.
He means it, Matt.
He'll shoot you in the back.
I got eyes in the back of my head.
Just let me know if he comes back.
Who is it, marshal? His name's Cullers.
Take it easy, Cullers.
Marshal, I- I've been shot.
Well, you're not gonna die.
Doc'll take care of you.
You're lucky whoever used that shotgun wasn't 10 yards closer.
Mr.
Dillon? Over here, Chester.
Get him up.
Take him over to Doc's office, will you? You see who did this, Cullers? No, I didn't see nobody.
But I could tell you who it was, though.
You heard her.
Kitty.
She said she was gonna do it.
With a shotgun too.
Well, that was just talk.
Talk? You saw my back.
Well, I wouldn't blame her if she did do it, Cullers.
You brought this whole thing on yourself.
You're lucky you weren't killed.
Now, where'd the shot come from? Over there by that tree.
All right, Chester, take him over, will you? Give him a hand.
Ooh, easy.
Oh.
All right, now, the rest of you folks just move along, will you? Come on, Moss.
Them look like the prints of a woman's shoe.
Yeah.
Matt? Kitty.
How long you been here? I heard the shot and came running.
I was afraid Cullers had That's funny, I didn't hear you come up.
Why didn't you say something? You were over there with him, and there was a crowd.
Matt, you don't think I did this, do you? What were you doing around here anyway during working hours? I just went for a walk.
A walk? Since when did you start that? Tonight.
I just felt like it, and I haven't got an alibi.
Kitty, Cullers was shot with a shotgun.
By a woman.
Just like I said I'd do.
Just like you said you'd do.
And a lot of people heard you.
Aw, Kitty, why'd you have to take a thing like this on yourself? You shoulda come to me first.
Well, I knew there were plenty of so-called respectable people in Dodge that would jump at a chance like this, but I didn't think you would, Matt.
Look at these.
Those are women's footprints.
They look a lot like yours.
They fit exactly.
There are plenty of other women in Dodge who wear shoes, you know.
Kitty, go on back to my office and wait for me, will you? Matt, are you gonna make me say it? Do you want me to say that I didn't do it? Well, I'm not gonna say it.
You just have to believe me.
Look, Kitty, it doesn't matter what I believe.
I gotta be able to prove it legally to all those respectable people.
Go on back to my office and give me a chance, will you? Well, beats me, Mr.
Dillon.
They just disappeared, the whole kit and caboodle of 'em.
Yeah, and took all their luggage too.
What about that Indian girl, Moss? Who is she? Darned if I know.
She never said.
They was a strange bunch.
All I know is that they paid cash for their room.
Whoa, now.
Whoa.
Mind telling me where you're going? That any business of yours, marshal? Well, since Cullers has been shot, yes.
Well, we're going for him now to get him and take him home.
Doc'll need more time with him.
Well, we'll be taking him home directly, anyways.
All right.
I'll ride up to Doc's with you, if you don't mind.
Go get Kitty and bring her up to Doc's, will you? Yes, sir.
You ever handle a shotgun, miss? Blossom don't talk much, marshal.
Yeah, so I see.
Hyah! Let's go! Where is he, marshal? Well, Doc's probably got him in the back room patching him up.
Can I see him? In a minute.
First I wanna- Hello, Kitty.
Matt.
This the one, marshal? Yes, this is Miss Kitty.
Yeah.
I can see why.
But she refused to marry him.
She did? Kitty, this is Nettie Batcher, Cullers' housekeeper.
And this is Blossom.
I still don't know who she is.
You never told me if you handled a shotgun, miss.
Maybe you'd tell me if you had some reason to shoot Cullers.
Maybe you didn't want him to get married.
Or maybe you thought it oughta be you.
Was that it? No.
But you did shoot him, didn't you? Yes, I did it.
Blossom, stop it.
I did it.
It was me.
No! Why'd you do it? I did it.
I had to.
Marshal, leave her alone.
Blossom's his daughter.
She didn't do it.
She's only trying to protect me.
You? Twenty years I been with him.
Cleaning his house, cooking his food, raising his kids, nursing his crippled old ma.
And all them years he kept saying he'd get married when his ma died.
You thought he meant you.
Who else would have him? Him and his crazy ways.
I didn't believe he'd ever find a girl to marry him.
I didn't believe it, even when he said he had.
If you didn't believe it, why'd you shoot him? Didn't aim to kill him.
I just wanted to hurt him some.
He never looked at me.
Twenty years, he never looked at me.
But I'm sorry, now, I Oh, marshal, can I see him? I'll see.
Matt.
Doc.
Yeah? How's he look? He Like a ham full of cloves.
Did you find out who did it? Yeah.
There's a lady outside wants to talk to him.
Is it all right if I let her in? Does she have to? Yeah, she has to.
Well, all right, but you stay here.
I don't want any trouble in here.
All right, ma'am.
Ah.
Hello, Nettie.
Nip, I- Nip, I'm sorry I done it.
You? You done it? Well, it made me mad.
You going off trying to marry some other woman.
It made you mad? Why? After 20 years of waiting, you ask me that? Nettie you been waiting for me? Ever since I come to work for you after your wife died.
Why, you never told me that.
It ain't for a woman to speak up.
Well, you sure never did till tonight.
You sure spoke up tonight.
Hold your tongue for 20 years and then blow me up with a shotgun.
You're quite a woman, Nettie.
Quite a woman.
Funny I never noticed that.
You ain't looked at me in 20 years.
I'm looking at you now.
Doc, there's not gonna be any trouble here.
No.
No, there's not.
How is he? Well, looks like you just lost yourself a bridegroom.
Is he dead? No, he's very much alive.
He's alive enough to marry Nettie.
Took her 20 years and a little buckshot, but she finally landed him.
Twenty years.
That's an awful long time.
I don't know whether I could wait that long.
Little buckshot, huh? Now, wait a minute.
What's the matter, you scared? Come on, I'll buy you a drink.

Previous EpisodeNext Episode