Gwaith/Cartref (2011) s01e02 Episode Script
Episode 2
Did you hear about Emyr's black eye? He needed putting in his place.
Simon Watkins will take over as Head of Geography.
I don't want a promotion.
Dan's a nice guy.
Is he? He's always with Simon.
He looks like a boy-band reject.
I think he looks nice.
Do you fancy him? I haven't paid the bill yet.
What will you do? Is it possible to have cash? RESEARCHER / PRODUCER / PRESENTER I wanted to be a director.
Last night was a one-off, never-to-be-repeated experience, OK? I've had a few of those myself.
What are you? A doctor? A gardener.
What are you doing? I'm trying to get hold of Dan.
Where's that noise coming from? Oh! Woof! HOME / WORK WORK I'm delighted to announce Oh! .
.
that the fund-raising for our twin school in Malawi will continue .
.
despite the absence of the project's organizer, Mrs Gwen Lloyd.
Our thanks to Simon Watkins who saved the day .
.
to ensure the children from Mbomba receive our continued support.
Sara Harries's GCSE class are excused from their lessons .
.
since they'll be visiting an art exhibition.
Activities of this kind .
.
prove that we offer a comprehensive education .
.
of the highest standard.
Hear, hear! In order to expand our provision .
.
I'm looking for an extra person to teach Media Studies this year.
Fans of Fellini .
.
should speak to my secretary, Gemma Haddon.
I have information about this scheme on my desk .
.
and will discuss it with a select few before the end of the day.
Thank you, people.
Top notch, Mr El! Thanks for your feedback.
If anyone asks .
.
the name of the appeal is Raising Money For Malawi, OK? Paste those labels neatly onto the buckets, please.
What's her name? You were gone all weekend.
She must be one hell of a woman.
I thought you and Grug would appreciate the peace.
Don't worry, it's safe for you to come home.
Have you seen my new sign? I thought your official title was Acting Head of Department.
By the end of term, I'll prove to the Head that I deserve this job.
And I was under the impression that you cared about poverty in Africa.
I care about a lot of things including my career.
You'd better do something about those two.
Hey, boys.
Grow up! Hey, boys.
Stop it! Stop it, Aaron.
That's enough.
Apologize to Miss Edwards.
Sorry.
Go back to your lesson.
I'll keep him in case these two play up again.
If you don't mind, Mr Rowlands Not at all.
I'm sure Aaron will enjoy revising his mutations.
Go! Get back to the studio.
Hurry up.
Thank you, Wyn.
I wanted to apologize It's fine.
It's our little secret.
White wine has a bad effect on me too.
Copy these equations into your books before the bell goes.
Yes? Sorry to disturb you, Miss Matthews.
Can I borrow some calculators? I think you mean 'cyfrifianellau', Mr James.
CHILDREN SNIGGER Sorry, Miss.
SCHOOL BELL Don't forget the test on Thursday.
You kept your head down over the weekend.
Nobody expected Friday night to end up as it did.
Especially Sara.
Dafydd Williams, what are you wearing? Very cool, Daf.
Take it off, OK? Button that up.
I'll collect what you've raised at lunchtime.
I saw Glyn Richards in the Head's office earlier.
He was going to speak to a few people about the training scheme.
Will you text me if you hear anything? I'd like to think the Head sees me as a potential headmaster.
If I'm going to climb the ladder No pun intended.
I want to know who I'm up against.
Alright, but only because I'm worried about your blood pressure.
Don't lose anyone! Mr Elis, the team is ready, and we're about to leave.
That's wonderful, and don't forget that you're representing the school.
Yes.
I'm out all day, but my phone is on if you need to get hold of me.
Thank you for informing me of that, Mr Watkins.
It's lycra, Mr El.
It keeps everything in place.
Jac Lewis, what's this racket? Mr James.
Good morning, Miss Matthews.
How long did you endure the silent treatment from my sister? I went away for the weekend.
I would've looked after you if you needed somewhere to hide.
Oh, Miss.
Here's my permission slip to play in this afternoon's game.
Oh, sh Shape up? You do realize that she's keeping a list.
Anyone who doesn't contribute to the coffee fund gets a beating! I spent my last £5 on a goat or whatever the latest good cause is.
Alright? I wanted to apologize for Friday night.
Did you manage to fix the painting? No, and it's a pity because it was a commission and I need the money.
Sorry, I didn't realize How much do I owe you? £1,000.
WHISTLE Due to a breakdown in communication .
.
you will not be aware that Year 10 girls are playing netball today.
I'm sorry about this .
.
but I'd appreciate it if you released the girls at two o'clock.
A breakdown in communication? Shambles - Beca's speciality.
You didn't finish your curry.
I'm surprised you care.
I don't, but you left without paying, and I put £10 in for you.
Thanks.
I forgive you, by the way.
You were drunk, you had an audience Wyn, I'm not sorry about what I said.
I don't fancy you.
I had another offer after I left the restaurant.
Nerys Edwards threw herself at me.
It's a shame I don't fancy older women, isn't it? I thought you couldn't find a babysitter .
.
to make a fool of myself? You haven't done that.
You didn't see the look on his face when I kissed him, Grug.
I've been single for so long.
I can't read the signals any more.
SCHOOL BELL I've got experience in the field.
Room 23, OK? Do you think he'd give me a chance? What are you going on about? The Head wants someone else to teach Media Studies.
I'd love to do it.
You'll have to speak to Miss Edwards.
Nerys Edwards, Head of the Drama Department.
She's been overseeing the subject since the start of term.
Who's having the Sara Harries treatment today? Smot? Miss Matthews? This communication breakdown has left me with a problem.
I was hoping you could re-think your travel plans.
Sorry? I need the minibus to take the girls to Llantrisant.
You could walk to the gallery in half an hour.
What do you say? I'm saying this.
Be professional and make proper arrangements the next time.
'FOR SALE' Think about a bear.
How would she react if she was angry? Let's see.
Raaargh! Alright? Let's all have a go.
One, two, three Raaargh! Well done, Darren.
Again.
SCHOOL BELL Hi, Simon Watkins, Head of Geography.
Shall we go inside? Follow me.
Are you serious, sir? Totally serious.
Only a saddo would know the answer to that.
You don't say, Ryan.
What is it then? CHILDREN LAUGH Unlucky, Ryan.
Nice one, sir.
The Head has asked me to take your class for you, Miss Matthews.
Thank you.
Right then, Ryan.
Have you got any ideas? No? OK, um I've only been Head of Year for two terms.
And I was right to appoint you in that role.
This qualification is a natural step for you.
I know you're young, but it's important to prepare for the future.
I'll have to think about it.
Of course.
I'm sure Simon will support you .
.
just like you'll support him one day.
Roller coasters and crocodiles.
Florida is the most amazing holiday I've ever had.
Thank you, Steffan.
I especially enjoyed your detailed description .
.
of the girl vomiting on the roller coaster.
Um Jac? Luke went to Australia, sir.
We'll hear about Luke's adventures after we hear about your holiday.
I assume you've done your homework.
Yes, but I don't think anyone wants to hear about my week in Pwllheli.
Pwllheli isn't as exotic as the Great Barrier Reef .
.
but I want to hear your comments.
It's a dump, sir.
Come on.
You might be right.
We don't want to insult the Welsh Tourist Board.
Luke, tell us about Queensland.
SCHOOL BELL Friday, do you hear me? Jac How long did you spend on your report? I didn't rush it.
I noticed a few mistakes.
I've always been a crap speller.
Have you ever had any help with your spelling? Alright, I did it on the bus this morning.
I'll do it again.
Jac Oi, walk.
I should report that boy.
Don't you think you're overreacting? Don't you think you need to have more control over your pupils? Hey! 'ERECTION' This is unacceptable.
Welsh speakers shop in supermarkets too! Get out of my sight.
Sorry, there's always one who has to let the side down unfortunately.
Hey, boys boys! Mr Tomos, your ears must be burning.
I was telling Mr Adams that you could recommend someone .
.
who can help Megan with her Welsh.
Yes, I know a few people.
Very good.
We should go and see Mrs Dafis.
Thank you for coming in, Mr Adams.
Your eye looks better.
Concealer.
I should I'll give Megan a few names.
He's got a nice arse, fair play.
Who was its last owner? Dad.
I inherited it.
Did you enjoy yourself on Friday? I was drunk.
So, things didn't work out with Beca? Do you want to see inside? You're better off without her, Dan.
Believe you me.
Look, £500 and you can have the keys now.
Does that price include the bike? MOBILE PHONE Sir Geldof, how are you? MIMICS DRUM 'N' BASS Yes.
OK, I'll be there now.
Thanks.
Where's Rhian? TANNOY ALER "Would Rhian Derbyshire return to the checkouts immediately, please?" Rhian What are you doing here? Simon called for back-up.
Why? He knew I was coming.
I don't know Rhian Derbyshire.
RHIAN CHOKES Alright, Rhian.
Don't worry.
Do you know what you're doing? No one, two I've been looking for you everywhere.
Better late than never.
What's wrong with you? She was choking.
She turned blue.
She's more upset about an uneaten Danish than a near-death experience.
I can't believe you're being so irresponsible.
If she goes to hospital, the Head will know.
And you think he'll blame you.
He's looking for future head teachers.
He won't choose me if he hears a pupil choked on a cinnamon whirl .
.
and the school held an 'erection' under my supervision.
Rhian is fine.
Please don't make a mountain out of a molehill.
I phoned Rhian's mother.
She's happy for her to go back to school.
Genius.
The Head doesn't need to know a thing now.
Oh, Grug come on.
'JAC LEWIS - YEAR 7.
' Are you coming to support us, Headmaster? We need a mascot.
Was it a successful day? Very successful.
What happened to the label? A misunderstanding.
Back to the classroom.
I could find you a pair of pompoms.
Another time, maybe.
Don't you believe me? You haven't been to any of my games since I've been here.
You sound disappointed.
I am.
Here's the minibus now.
Top notch, Mr El! What part of the arrangements don't you understand, Miss? Harries I'm sorry Keep an eye on your students.
I'm preparing for a new exhibition, and I don't like to be disturbed.
Go back to your work quickly, Nadine.
"I don't mind at all, but you'd be perfect " Do you have another appointment? Netball, Mr Rowlands.
Miss Matthews is waiting.
I haven't said you can go yet.
We have to go.
I'll be the one to decide that.
Sit down.
Right, now.
Where were we? Oh, yes.
"Oi! shouted Gagz " Excuse me, Mr Rowlands.
I'm looking for Cerys and Beth.
There's a game this afternoon.
You should have told me.
I told everyone this morning.
Don't you remember? Girls You haven't had your homework yet.
We're going to be late.
Sorry, Miss Matthews.
If I'd known beforehand about the game .
.
I would have photocopied the question for them.
Right, where is it? A word, Mr Rowlands.
Read your notes quietly.
I know exactly what you're doing.
And what is that? Girls, we're leaving.
You know the rules.
Any trips need to be noted on the school network.
Don't play games with me, Wyn.
You'll regret it, I promise.
What's going on? Mr Rowlands refuses to release my girls.
It's the first I've Go with Miss Matthews, girls.
Leave it.
Come on, we're waiting for you.
Hurry up.
Chop-chop! Who is the prodigy? That's mine.
It isn't true what they say about teachers.
That we have too many holidays? I'm sorry, but preparing for this exhibition has been very stressful.
Stressful? You should spend a day with a class full of teenagers.
Well done, Ceri.
Come on, Jenna.
Sorry.
Ref, do you need glasses or what? Are you always this passionate? I always want to win.
What's the score? 6-3.
Concentrate, Bro Taf.
At least I'm showing my support now.
Move the ball, Rhian.
I need to speak to you, Beca.
Not about being a head teacher, I hope.
I wanted to discuss a sensitive issue.
Wahey! Well done, girls.
Sorry, can we talk another time? Tonight? Come on, Bro Taf.
MOBILE PHONE Ta-ra, Miss.
Hm-mm.
I don't want to hear any apologies.
I didn't intend to I'm sorry about what you heard, but MOBILE PHONE I wanted a word about Media Studies.
Hi, Michelle.
You may remember that I've got an interest in film.
No, he didn't.
I studied it, and I go to the cinema often.
I'm trying to talk.
What? And the school let him? Oh, for Listen, I'm leaving now.
What's wrong? Seren's father took her out of school without my consent.
He can't do that.
No! Oh, damn.
The taxi's engaged.
Oh! Never again.
Pub? No, I can't.
Salsa.
Simon, the Head wants to see you.
Shut up you're looking at a future headmaster.
Whoa! Car keys, now.
Do you want a hand with that? No, I can manage, thanks.
Simon said you were going out tonight.
Dirty Dancing, is it? Salsa.
And you got Simon to agree to go with you? Why? Has he said something to you? No, he hasn't said anything.
I just well He's never struck me as the Strictly Come Dancing type, that's all.
Maybe you don't know him as well as you think you do.
Nerys come on! HOME / WORK HOME TELEPHONE # So I walked in to see the animals # The elephant, giraffe and kangaroo # But they see the sun and the blue skies # And they want to go out # They see the sun and the blue skies # Your card has been declined.
OK, I'm sure I've got I'll pay.
Don't worry.
Thank you.
The irony is that when I ask Marc to collect Seren from school .
.
he usually makes an excuse, or he's too drunk to remember.
Oh, come on.
What? Did you see the Head? Yes.
He didn't say a word about the head teacher's training course.
He might say something tomorrow.
Why did he want to see you? Gwen Lloyd has arranged a conference call with Mbomba High tonight.
I'm cramming it in now.
What about our salsa lesson? KNOCK ON DOOR Yo! Hey, um you're not busy tonight, are you? Grug won't thank you.
You always made your mark on the dance floor in college.
For the wrong reasons.
Sorry, you'll have to find someone else to dance with your girlfriend.
But, I've No! I should've called, but the director said at the last minute that I've been worried sick, Marc.
You knew she's safe.
She's with me.
Burger and fries? Yes, here.
Thank you.
Come on, Seren.
You can have some food at home.
Maybe you should let Seren eat it, Nerys? I don't know about you, but I'm dying of thirst.
Drink? Fine.
Of course I'll come.
Any excuse to dress up and have free wine.
I can't go by myself and face people asking about my latest work.
Woof, woof, woof! Oi! You might find some inspiration.
That's what James said.
James? He owns the gallery.
Is he handsome? Does it matter? If the art is rubbish, at least I'll have something nice to look at! Over there.
Are you going back to school? Are you mad? I'm just someone who adores his job.
You're a freak.
What was the score? 8-7 to us.
You don't sound very happy about it.
The Head wants to meet me tonight for a drink.
Don't laugh, it isn't funny.
I don't know what I'll do if he tries it on.
You know what I'd do.
You'd sell your mother for a promotion! Cute.
How old is she? What's that in dog years, Aneurin? It's 118 years old.
You didn't know he was a human calculator, did you? It's her birthday next month.
That's why I wanted you to see these.
Hiya, bach.
Someone in the staff room said that you paint portraits of animals.
I don't think I've got the time.
Mam and Dad would be delighted with a painting of Blod .
.
especially one by a proper artist.
Don't shout at me.
You can't come.
Angharad has asked me to take her evening class.
You could go to the gallery on your own.
I'd prefer to stay home on my own.
Perhaps you could start on my painting.
You do specialize in pets, don't you? I washed your dishes.
You didn't have to.
No, but I don't want to live in a pigsty.
Did you find anyone to join you? It takes two to tango.
Salsa.
I'm sure I won't be the only person there without a partner.
Don't let him wind you up.
That's easier said than done.
What did you want to discuss .
.
before you got dragged into my soap opera of a life? I heard that they need another Media Studies teacher .
.
and I've been looking for a new challenge.
Is this your latest idea for a change of direction? Why not? I love watching films.
Yes, but you don't love being in the classroom.
Teaching this subject is not all milk and honey.
I know it's hard work, but I'm ready to put in the hours.
I'll add your name to the list.
There's been a lot of interest.
KNOCK ON DOOR I was going to put it through the letter box .
.
but my responsible side didn't think it was a good idea.
I do have a responsible side.
I'll pay the rest in instalments, if that's alright? I didn't expect to get a penny.
Damn! Friday night was just a blip.
I don't normally behave like that.
Not often anyway.
Thank goodness.
Haven't you forgotten something? 'WELSH FOR ADULTS' EMYR TOMOS # Ay candela, candela, candela me quemo ae # Ay candela, candela, candela me quemo ae # Puso un baile un jutia, para una gran diversion # De timbalero un raton, que alegraba el campo un dia # Un gato tambien venia, elegante y placentero # "Buena noches, companero" # Siempre dijo asi el timbale # Ouch! Oh, so sorry.
Try it again.
# Salio el raton medio loco # Sorry, excuse me.
How many times has he stood on your foot? It's not easy.
No, especially if you shake your arse Your hips.
You're meant to shake your hips.
Maybe someone should tell Fred Astaire over there.
Do you think you can do better? I'm willing to try.
# Ay candela, candela, candela me quemo ae # Ay candela, candela, candela me quemo ae # Thanks for staying to help, Gemma.
No problem.
The Head wouldn't have minded if you'd postponed it.
No, I know, but it was all arranged.
I'm sure you've had a busy day.
What makes you say that? Nothing, just I know the Head has had a lot on his plate.
Oh, because he was meeting teachers about the head teacher's course.
Was he? Give over, Simon.
I'm sure Grug gave you all the gen.
You must be very proud of her.
# Que vivan los momentos en tu boca y en tu cuerpo # Mujer # Valio la pena lo que era necesario para estar contigo amor # Tu eres una bendicion Las horas y la vida de tu lado nena # Estan para vivirlas pero a tu manera # Enhorabuena # "Grug can't answer the phone right now.
Please leave a message.
" # Valio la pena lo que era necesario para estar contigo amor # Tu eres una bendicion Las horas y la vida de tu lado nena # Estan para vivirlas pero a tu manera # Enhorabuena, porque valio la pena # Valio la pena # Te veo y me convenzo que te tenias que llegar # Despues de la tormenta aqui en tu pecho puedo anclar # Y ser mas yo, de nuevo yo, y por bandera mi ilusion # Y mira si te quiero que por amor me entrego # Que vivan los momentos en tu boca y en tu cuerpo # Mujer # Valio la pena # Unfortunately, Angharad couldn't be here tonight.
She asked me to take the lesson in her absence.
Angharad's off, so you've got me! 'Gwers heno' - Tonight's lesson.
In The Garden.
Sorry, I'm late.
Right Welsh vocabulary.
The team is doing well.
They're picking up.
Is this a good time to ask for new equipment for the department? The school would be bankrupt if I bought everything my staff wanted! Before I forget, call me 'ti' please.
We're not asking for much.
A few posts, some balls.
I like to think I treat everyone fairly.
Does everyone have a drink with you after work? Not everyone.
What makes me so different? You're the only one who calls me Mr El! What do you want? Lager, please.
Yes, I do have grass in my garden .
.
and 'chwyn' or weeds, unfortunately.
'Nesaf' or next? Do you have any 'prem'? 'Prem'? Sorry, I don't know Trees.
Oh, you mean 'pren'.
The word 'pren' doesn't mean Do you have any wood? Do you have 'coed'? I think that's what Sue wanted to say.
Thank you, Carol.
Yes, I have got some trees.
'Coed' means trees.
I doubt if you'd be interested in my recent paintings.
Watercolours? No.
I'm free on Wednesday.
I don't want to waste your time.
Don't be so judgemental of yourself.
Let others do that.
Sorry one moment.
Nadine? What are you doing here? Do your parents know you're here? Hello again.
I'd better make sure she gets home safely.
But I haven't done anything No arguing.
Come on.
Goodnight.
Is that where you were last weekend? Afan Argoed - the best mountain bike trails in Wales.
Simon was worried.
He thought he was missing out.
Do you often go away like that? I spent two years travelling the world.
I liked my own company.
It's Monday night.
I've got things to do for school.
That sounded pathetic, didn't it? Yes.
One drink.
Fine, Miss.
Have you booked a room or what? A drink, the hotel You've misunderstood.
Have I? Yes.
I brought you here tonight .
.
to ask you to stop flirting with me at work.
It's really flattering .
.
but I've been married to Eirlys for 20 years .
.
and I've never been unfaithful.
Hey I'm sure you're disappointed .
.
but nothing will happen between us.
'Wi eisiau', I want to 'Eisiau', well done.
.
.
to speak Welsh with Stuart and his Family? 'Teulu'.
Talk of the devil.
What's all this about? Angharad was off.
She asked me to take her lesson.
I think I understood all of that.
She'll be fluent before long.
Not so much, that time.
If Carol sets her mind to it I can imagine.
Stuart's a gardener.
Emyr needs to tidy his garden.
Give him your card.
Call me.
Will do.
Goodnight, then.
Goodnight.
What were you doing there tonight, Nadine? Did you like the paintings? Did you want a glass of wine or what? Are you going to say anything? POLICE SIREN Oh, damn! # Your problem is my problem # To take away from you # It's the first answer every time # It's the first answer every time for you # In your head, your head, your head, your head # He'll take a test.
Dyslexia explains a lot.
Not everyone with the condition runs riot.
I was an angel at school.
Are you dyslexic? I still struggle when reading the Head's reports.
You are not the only one.
TEXT MESSAGE Simon? He wants to know where I am.
TEXT MESSAGE 'WHERE ARE YOU?' Come on, we'd better go and find him.
There's something I haven't told him.
Are you OK, Miss? Yes.
I'm fine.
He looked like a little frog.
Alright, Si? He came in the end.
Yes, I was alright.
I'll, um How was the conference call? Why didn't you tell me? I didn't want to say anything until I'd decided what to do.
Are you mad? You've got to do it.
Sorry.
Come here.
Aww hug.
Grug is going to apply for the Headship training course.
We'll have to watch what we say now.
What do you mean 'now'? Hey! Um is that? Art? Yes.
I won't tell anyone about the police, Miss.
Thank you.
Goodnight.
# When I was a year or two younger # And I was a red-cheeked, innocent young lad # I'd go to school like every good little boy # Through fog and rain in the winter or the summer # At school, I had # History lessons, Geography lessons # And English lessons all the time # And one or two lessons in Welsh, fair play # Because I was a little Welshman #
Simon Watkins will take over as Head of Geography.
I don't want a promotion.
Dan's a nice guy.
Is he? He's always with Simon.
He looks like a boy-band reject.
I think he looks nice.
Do you fancy him? I haven't paid the bill yet.
What will you do? Is it possible to have cash? RESEARCHER / PRODUCER / PRESENTER I wanted to be a director.
Last night was a one-off, never-to-be-repeated experience, OK? I've had a few of those myself.
What are you? A doctor? A gardener.
What are you doing? I'm trying to get hold of Dan.
Where's that noise coming from? Oh! Woof! HOME / WORK WORK I'm delighted to announce Oh! .
.
that the fund-raising for our twin school in Malawi will continue .
.
despite the absence of the project's organizer, Mrs Gwen Lloyd.
Our thanks to Simon Watkins who saved the day .
.
to ensure the children from Mbomba receive our continued support.
Sara Harries's GCSE class are excused from their lessons .
.
since they'll be visiting an art exhibition.
Activities of this kind .
.
prove that we offer a comprehensive education .
.
of the highest standard.
Hear, hear! In order to expand our provision .
.
I'm looking for an extra person to teach Media Studies this year.
Fans of Fellini .
.
should speak to my secretary, Gemma Haddon.
I have information about this scheme on my desk .
.
and will discuss it with a select few before the end of the day.
Thank you, people.
Top notch, Mr El! Thanks for your feedback.
If anyone asks .
.
the name of the appeal is Raising Money For Malawi, OK? Paste those labels neatly onto the buckets, please.
What's her name? You were gone all weekend.
She must be one hell of a woman.
I thought you and Grug would appreciate the peace.
Don't worry, it's safe for you to come home.
Have you seen my new sign? I thought your official title was Acting Head of Department.
By the end of term, I'll prove to the Head that I deserve this job.
And I was under the impression that you cared about poverty in Africa.
I care about a lot of things including my career.
You'd better do something about those two.
Hey, boys.
Grow up! Hey, boys.
Stop it! Stop it, Aaron.
That's enough.
Apologize to Miss Edwards.
Sorry.
Go back to your lesson.
I'll keep him in case these two play up again.
If you don't mind, Mr Rowlands Not at all.
I'm sure Aaron will enjoy revising his mutations.
Go! Get back to the studio.
Hurry up.
Thank you, Wyn.
I wanted to apologize It's fine.
It's our little secret.
White wine has a bad effect on me too.
Copy these equations into your books before the bell goes.
Yes? Sorry to disturb you, Miss Matthews.
Can I borrow some calculators? I think you mean 'cyfrifianellau', Mr James.
CHILDREN SNIGGER Sorry, Miss.
SCHOOL BELL Don't forget the test on Thursday.
You kept your head down over the weekend.
Nobody expected Friday night to end up as it did.
Especially Sara.
Dafydd Williams, what are you wearing? Very cool, Daf.
Take it off, OK? Button that up.
I'll collect what you've raised at lunchtime.
I saw Glyn Richards in the Head's office earlier.
He was going to speak to a few people about the training scheme.
Will you text me if you hear anything? I'd like to think the Head sees me as a potential headmaster.
If I'm going to climb the ladder No pun intended.
I want to know who I'm up against.
Alright, but only because I'm worried about your blood pressure.
Don't lose anyone! Mr Elis, the team is ready, and we're about to leave.
That's wonderful, and don't forget that you're representing the school.
Yes.
I'm out all day, but my phone is on if you need to get hold of me.
Thank you for informing me of that, Mr Watkins.
It's lycra, Mr El.
It keeps everything in place.
Jac Lewis, what's this racket? Mr James.
Good morning, Miss Matthews.
How long did you endure the silent treatment from my sister? I went away for the weekend.
I would've looked after you if you needed somewhere to hide.
Oh, Miss.
Here's my permission slip to play in this afternoon's game.
Oh, sh Shape up? You do realize that she's keeping a list.
Anyone who doesn't contribute to the coffee fund gets a beating! I spent my last £5 on a goat or whatever the latest good cause is.
Alright? I wanted to apologize for Friday night.
Did you manage to fix the painting? No, and it's a pity because it was a commission and I need the money.
Sorry, I didn't realize How much do I owe you? £1,000.
WHISTLE Due to a breakdown in communication .
.
you will not be aware that Year 10 girls are playing netball today.
I'm sorry about this .
.
but I'd appreciate it if you released the girls at two o'clock.
A breakdown in communication? Shambles - Beca's speciality.
You didn't finish your curry.
I'm surprised you care.
I don't, but you left without paying, and I put £10 in for you.
Thanks.
I forgive you, by the way.
You were drunk, you had an audience Wyn, I'm not sorry about what I said.
I don't fancy you.
I had another offer after I left the restaurant.
Nerys Edwards threw herself at me.
It's a shame I don't fancy older women, isn't it? I thought you couldn't find a babysitter .
.
to make a fool of myself? You haven't done that.
You didn't see the look on his face when I kissed him, Grug.
I've been single for so long.
I can't read the signals any more.
SCHOOL BELL I've got experience in the field.
Room 23, OK? Do you think he'd give me a chance? What are you going on about? The Head wants someone else to teach Media Studies.
I'd love to do it.
You'll have to speak to Miss Edwards.
Nerys Edwards, Head of the Drama Department.
She's been overseeing the subject since the start of term.
Who's having the Sara Harries treatment today? Smot? Miss Matthews? This communication breakdown has left me with a problem.
I was hoping you could re-think your travel plans.
Sorry? I need the minibus to take the girls to Llantrisant.
You could walk to the gallery in half an hour.
What do you say? I'm saying this.
Be professional and make proper arrangements the next time.
'FOR SALE' Think about a bear.
How would she react if she was angry? Let's see.
Raaargh! Alright? Let's all have a go.
One, two, three Raaargh! Well done, Darren.
Again.
SCHOOL BELL Hi, Simon Watkins, Head of Geography.
Shall we go inside? Follow me.
Are you serious, sir? Totally serious.
Only a saddo would know the answer to that.
You don't say, Ryan.
What is it then? CHILDREN LAUGH Unlucky, Ryan.
Nice one, sir.
The Head has asked me to take your class for you, Miss Matthews.
Thank you.
Right then, Ryan.
Have you got any ideas? No? OK, um I've only been Head of Year for two terms.
And I was right to appoint you in that role.
This qualification is a natural step for you.
I know you're young, but it's important to prepare for the future.
I'll have to think about it.
Of course.
I'm sure Simon will support you .
.
just like you'll support him one day.
Roller coasters and crocodiles.
Florida is the most amazing holiday I've ever had.
Thank you, Steffan.
I especially enjoyed your detailed description .
.
of the girl vomiting on the roller coaster.
Um Jac? Luke went to Australia, sir.
We'll hear about Luke's adventures after we hear about your holiday.
I assume you've done your homework.
Yes, but I don't think anyone wants to hear about my week in Pwllheli.
Pwllheli isn't as exotic as the Great Barrier Reef .
.
but I want to hear your comments.
It's a dump, sir.
Come on.
You might be right.
We don't want to insult the Welsh Tourist Board.
Luke, tell us about Queensland.
SCHOOL BELL Friday, do you hear me? Jac How long did you spend on your report? I didn't rush it.
I noticed a few mistakes.
I've always been a crap speller.
Have you ever had any help with your spelling? Alright, I did it on the bus this morning.
I'll do it again.
Jac Oi, walk.
I should report that boy.
Don't you think you're overreacting? Don't you think you need to have more control over your pupils? Hey! 'ERECTION' This is unacceptable.
Welsh speakers shop in supermarkets too! Get out of my sight.
Sorry, there's always one who has to let the side down unfortunately.
Hey, boys boys! Mr Tomos, your ears must be burning.
I was telling Mr Adams that you could recommend someone .
.
who can help Megan with her Welsh.
Yes, I know a few people.
Very good.
We should go and see Mrs Dafis.
Thank you for coming in, Mr Adams.
Your eye looks better.
Concealer.
I should I'll give Megan a few names.
He's got a nice arse, fair play.
Who was its last owner? Dad.
I inherited it.
Did you enjoy yourself on Friday? I was drunk.
So, things didn't work out with Beca? Do you want to see inside? You're better off without her, Dan.
Believe you me.
Look, £500 and you can have the keys now.
Does that price include the bike? MOBILE PHONE Sir Geldof, how are you? MIMICS DRUM 'N' BASS Yes.
OK, I'll be there now.
Thanks.
Where's Rhian? TANNOY ALER "Would Rhian Derbyshire return to the checkouts immediately, please?" Rhian What are you doing here? Simon called for back-up.
Why? He knew I was coming.
I don't know Rhian Derbyshire.
RHIAN CHOKES Alright, Rhian.
Don't worry.
Do you know what you're doing? No one, two I've been looking for you everywhere.
Better late than never.
What's wrong with you? She was choking.
She turned blue.
She's more upset about an uneaten Danish than a near-death experience.
I can't believe you're being so irresponsible.
If she goes to hospital, the Head will know.
And you think he'll blame you.
He's looking for future head teachers.
He won't choose me if he hears a pupil choked on a cinnamon whirl .
.
and the school held an 'erection' under my supervision.
Rhian is fine.
Please don't make a mountain out of a molehill.
I phoned Rhian's mother.
She's happy for her to go back to school.
Genius.
The Head doesn't need to know a thing now.
Oh, Grug come on.
'JAC LEWIS - YEAR 7.
' Are you coming to support us, Headmaster? We need a mascot.
Was it a successful day? Very successful.
What happened to the label? A misunderstanding.
Back to the classroom.
I could find you a pair of pompoms.
Another time, maybe.
Don't you believe me? You haven't been to any of my games since I've been here.
You sound disappointed.
I am.
Here's the minibus now.
Top notch, Mr El! What part of the arrangements don't you understand, Miss? Harries I'm sorry Keep an eye on your students.
I'm preparing for a new exhibition, and I don't like to be disturbed.
Go back to your work quickly, Nadine.
"I don't mind at all, but you'd be perfect " Do you have another appointment? Netball, Mr Rowlands.
Miss Matthews is waiting.
I haven't said you can go yet.
We have to go.
I'll be the one to decide that.
Sit down.
Right, now.
Where were we? Oh, yes.
"Oi! shouted Gagz " Excuse me, Mr Rowlands.
I'm looking for Cerys and Beth.
There's a game this afternoon.
You should have told me.
I told everyone this morning.
Don't you remember? Girls You haven't had your homework yet.
We're going to be late.
Sorry, Miss Matthews.
If I'd known beforehand about the game .
.
I would have photocopied the question for them.
Right, where is it? A word, Mr Rowlands.
Read your notes quietly.
I know exactly what you're doing.
And what is that? Girls, we're leaving.
You know the rules.
Any trips need to be noted on the school network.
Don't play games with me, Wyn.
You'll regret it, I promise.
What's going on? Mr Rowlands refuses to release my girls.
It's the first I've Go with Miss Matthews, girls.
Leave it.
Come on, we're waiting for you.
Hurry up.
Chop-chop! Who is the prodigy? That's mine.
It isn't true what they say about teachers.
That we have too many holidays? I'm sorry, but preparing for this exhibition has been very stressful.
Stressful? You should spend a day with a class full of teenagers.
Well done, Ceri.
Come on, Jenna.
Sorry.
Ref, do you need glasses or what? Are you always this passionate? I always want to win.
What's the score? 6-3.
Concentrate, Bro Taf.
At least I'm showing my support now.
Move the ball, Rhian.
I need to speak to you, Beca.
Not about being a head teacher, I hope.
I wanted to discuss a sensitive issue.
Wahey! Well done, girls.
Sorry, can we talk another time? Tonight? Come on, Bro Taf.
MOBILE PHONE Ta-ra, Miss.
Hm-mm.
I don't want to hear any apologies.
I didn't intend to I'm sorry about what you heard, but MOBILE PHONE I wanted a word about Media Studies.
Hi, Michelle.
You may remember that I've got an interest in film.
No, he didn't.
I studied it, and I go to the cinema often.
I'm trying to talk.
What? And the school let him? Oh, for Listen, I'm leaving now.
What's wrong? Seren's father took her out of school without my consent.
He can't do that.
No! Oh, damn.
The taxi's engaged.
Oh! Never again.
Pub? No, I can't.
Salsa.
Simon, the Head wants to see you.
Shut up you're looking at a future headmaster.
Whoa! Car keys, now.
Do you want a hand with that? No, I can manage, thanks.
Simon said you were going out tonight.
Dirty Dancing, is it? Salsa.
And you got Simon to agree to go with you? Why? Has he said something to you? No, he hasn't said anything.
I just well He's never struck me as the Strictly Come Dancing type, that's all.
Maybe you don't know him as well as you think you do.
Nerys come on! HOME / WORK HOME TELEPHONE # So I walked in to see the animals # The elephant, giraffe and kangaroo # But they see the sun and the blue skies # And they want to go out # They see the sun and the blue skies # Your card has been declined.
OK, I'm sure I've got I'll pay.
Don't worry.
Thank you.
The irony is that when I ask Marc to collect Seren from school .
.
he usually makes an excuse, or he's too drunk to remember.
Oh, come on.
What? Did you see the Head? Yes.
He didn't say a word about the head teacher's training course.
He might say something tomorrow.
Why did he want to see you? Gwen Lloyd has arranged a conference call with Mbomba High tonight.
I'm cramming it in now.
What about our salsa lesson? KNOCK ON DOOR Yo! Hey, um you're not busy tonight, are you? Grug won't thank you.
You always made your mark on the dance floor in college.
For the wrong reasons.
Sorry, you'll have to find someone else to dance with your girlfriend.
But, I've No! I should've called, but the director said at the last minute that I've been worried sick, Marc.
You knew she's safe.
She's with me.
Burger and fries? Yes, here.
Thank you.
Come on, Seren.
You can have some food at home.
Maybe you should let Seren eat it, Nerys? I don't know about you, but I'm dying of thirst.
Drink? Fine.
Of course I'll come.
Any excuse to dress up and have free wine.
I can't go by myself and face people asking about my latest work.
Woof, woof, woof! Oi! You might find some inspiration.
That's what James said.
James? He owns the gallery.
Is he handsome? Does it matter? If the art is rubbish, at least I'll have something nice to look at! Over there.
Are you going back to school? Are you mad? I'm just someone who adores his job.
You're a freak.
What was the score? 8-7 to us.
You don't sound very happy about it.
The Head wants to meet me tonight for a drink.
Don't laugh, it isn't funny.
I don't know what I'll do if he tries it on.
You know what I'd do.
You'd sell your mother for a promotion! Cute.
How old is she? What's that in dog years, Aneurin? It's 118 years old.
You didn't know he was a human calculator, did you? It's her birthday next month.
That's why I wanted you to see these.
Hiya, bach.
Someone in the staff room said that you paint portraits of animals.
I don't think I've got the time.
Mam and Dad would be delighted with a painting of Blod .
.
especially one by a proper artist.
Don't shout at me.
You can't come.
Angharad has asked me to take her evening class.
You could go to the gallery on your own.
I'd prefer to stay home on my own.
Perhaps you could start on my painting.
You do specialize in pets, don't you? I washed your dishes.
You didn't have to.
No, but I don't want to live in a pigsty.
Did you find anyone to join you? It takes two to tango.
Salsa.
I'm sure I won't be the only person there without a partner.
Don't let him wind you up.
That's easier said than done.
What did you want to discuss .
.
before you got dragged into my soap opera of a life? I heard that they need another Media Studies teacher .
.
and I've been looking for a new challenge.
Is this your latest idea for a change of direction? Why not? I love watching films.
Yes, but you don't love being in the classroom.
Teaching this subject is not all milk and honey.
I know it's hard work, but I'm ready to put in the hours.
I'll add your name to the list.
There's been a lot of interest.
KNOCK ON DOOR I was going to put it through the letter box .
.
but my responsible side didn't think it was a good idea.
I do have a responsible side.
I'll pay the rest in instalments, if that's alright? I didn't expect to get a penny.
Damn! Friday night was just a blip.
I don't normally behave like that.
Not often anyway.
Thank goodness.
Haven't you forgotten something? 'WELSH FOR ADULTS' EMYR TOMOS # Ay candela, candela, candela me quemo ae # Ay candela, candela, candela me quemo ae # Puso un baile un jutia, para una gran diversion # De timbalero un raton, que alegraba el campo un dia # Un gato tambien venia, elegante y placentero # "Buena noches, companero" # Siempre dijo asi el timbale # Ouch! Oh, so sorry.
Try it again.
# Salio el raton medio loco # Sorry, excuse me.
How many times has he stood on your foot? It's not easy.
No, especially if you shake your arse Your hips.
You're meant to shake your hips.
Maybe someone should tell Fred Astaire over there.
Do you think you can do better? I'm willing to try.
# Ay candela, candela, candela me quemo ae # Ay candela, candela, candela me quemo ae # Thanks for staying to help, Gemma.
No problem.
The Head wouldn't have minded if you'd postponed it.
No, I know, but it was all arranged.
I'm sure you've had a busy day.
What makes you say that? Nothing, just I know the Head has had a lot on his plate.
Oh, because he was meeting teachers about the head teacher's course.
Was he? Give over, Simon.
I'm sure Grug gave you all the gen.
You must be very proud of her.
# Que vivan los momentos en tu boca y en tu cuerpo # Mujer # Valio la pena lo que era necesario para estar contigo amor # Tu eres una bendicion Las horas y la vida de tu lado nena # Estan para vivirlas pero a tu manera # Enhorabuena # "Grug can't answer the phone right now.
Please leave a message.
" # Valio la pena lo que era necesario para estar contigo amor # Tu eres una bendicion Las horas y la vida de tu lado nena # Estan para vivirlas pero a tu manera # Enhorabuena, porque valio la pena # Valio la pena # Te veo y me convenzo que te tenias que llegar # Despues de la tormenta aqui en tu pecho puedo anclar # Y ser mas yo, de nuevo yo, y por bandera mi ilusion # Y mira si te quiero que por amor me entrego # Que vivan los momentos en tu boca y en tu cuerpo # Mujer # Valio la pena # Unfortunately, Angharad couldn't be here tonight.
She asked me to take the lesson in her absence.
Angharad's off, so you've got me! 'Gwers heno' - Tonight's lesson.
In The Garden.
Sorry, I'm late.
Right Welsh vocabulary.
The team is doing well.
They're picking up.
Is this a good time to ask for new equipment for the department? The school would be bankrupt if I bought everything my staff wanted! Before I forget, call me 'ti' please.
We're not asking for much.
A few posts, some balls.
I like to think I treat everyone fairly.
Does everyone have a drink with you after work? Not everyone.
What makes me so different? You're the only one who calls me Mr El! What do you want? Lager, please.
Yes, I do have grass in my garden .
.
and 'chwyn' or weeds, unfortunately.
'Nesaf' or next? Do you have any 'prem'? 'Prem'? Sorry, I don't know Trees.
Oh, you mean 'pren'.
The word 'pren' doesn't mean Do you have any wood? Do you have 'coed'? I think that's what Sue wanted to say.
Thank you, Carol.
Yes, I have got some trees.
'Coed' means trees.
I doubt if you'd be interested in my recent paintings.
Watercolours? No.
I'm free on Wednesday.
I don't want to waste your time.
Don't be so judgemental of yourself.
Let others do that.
Sorry one moment.
Nadine? What are you doing here? Do your parents know you're here? Hello again.
I'd better make sure she gets home safely.
But I haven't done anything No arguing.
Come on.
Goodnight.
Is that where you were last weekend? Afan Argoed - the best mountain bike trails in Wales.
Simon was worried.
He thought he was missing out.
Do you often go away like that? I spent two years travelling the world.
I liked my own company.
It's Monday night.
I've got things to do for school.
That sounded pathetic, didn't it? Yes.
One drink.
Fine, Miss.
Have you booked a room or what? A drink, the hotel You've misunderstood.
Have I? Yes.
I brought you here tonight .
.
to ask you to stop flirting with me at work.
It's really flattering .
.
but I've been married to Eirlys for 20 years .
.
and I've never been unfaithful.
Hey I'm sure you're disappointed .
.
but nothing will happen between us.
'Wi eisiau', I want to 'Eisiau', well done.
.
.
to speak Welsh with Stuart and his Family? 'Teulu'.
Talk of the devil.
What's all this about? Angharad was off.
She asked me to take her lesson.
I think I understood all of that.
She'll be fluent before long.
Not so much, that time.
If Carol sets her mind to it I can imagine.
Stuart's a gardener.
Emyr needs to tidy his garden.
Give him your card.
Call me.
Will do.
Goodnight, then.
Goodnight.
What were you doing there tonight, Nadine? Did you like the paintings? Did you want a glass of wine or what? Are you going to say anything? POLICE SIREN Oh, damn! # Your problem is my problem # To take away from you # It's the first answer every time # It's the first answer every time for you # In your head, your head, your head, your head # He'll take a test.
Dyslexia explains a lot.
Not everyone with the condition runs riot.
I was an angel at school.
Are you dyslexic? I still struggle when reading the Head's reports.
You are not the only one.
TEXT MESSAGE Simon? He wants to know where I am.
TEXT MESSAGE 'WHERE ARE YOU?' Come on, we'd better go and find him.
There's something I haven't told him.
Are you OK, Miss? Yes.
I'm fine.
He looked like a little frog.
Alright, Si? He came in the end.
Yes, I was alright.
I'll, um How was the conference call? Why didn't you tell me? I didn't want to say anything until I'd decided what to do.
Are you mad? You've got to do it.
Sorry.
Come here.
Aww hug.
Grug is going to apply for the Headship training course.
We'll have to watch what we say now.
What do you mean 'now'? Hey! Um is that? Art? Yes.
I won't tell anyone about the police, Miss.
Thank you.
Goodnight.
# When I was a year or two younger # And I was a red-cheeked, innocent young lad # I'd go to school like every good little boy # Through fog and rain in the winter or the summer # At school, I had # History lessons, Geography lessons # And English lessons all the time # And one or two lessons in Welsh, fair play # Because I was a little Welshman #