Henry Danger (2014) s01e04 Episode Script

Tears of the Jolly Beetle

1 [ MUSIC .]
TO FIGHT THAT CRIME.
AND, LUCKILY, SWELLVIEW HAS THE BEST CRIME FIGHTERS OF ALL.
AND SO, MY FELLOW SWELLVIEWIANS, AS VICE MAYOR OF THIS FINE CITY, I PRESENT THESE MEDALS OF RECOGNITION FOR BRAVERY AND COMMUNITY SERVICE TO OUR VERY OWN CAPTAIN MAN AND KID DANGER.
OH, AND PLEASE ACCEP THIS COUPON FOR ONE FREE MEDIUM FROZEN YOGURT.
WOW.
EACH? NO, YOU'LL HAVE TO SPLIT THE YOGURT.
THANK YOU, VICE MAYOR.
AND THANK YOU, CITIZENS OF SWELLVIEW.
HEY, WHY DIDN'T HENRY COME TO THIS? OH, HE HIS GOLDFISH HAD BABIES.
WHAT GOLDFISH? I DIDN'T KNOW HENRY HAD A GOLDFISH.
WELL, HE DOES AND SHE WAS PREGNANT.
DO WE KNOW WHO THE FATHER IS? AND WE VERY MUCH APPRECIATE THESE MEDALS AND THE YOGURT, WHICH WE'LL SHARE.
KID DANGER, YOU'RE UP.
WE LOVE YOU, KID DANGER! KID DANGER IS SO HOT.
YEAH, YOU DON'T WAN TO BE SAYING THAT.
EVEN THOUGH I'VE ONLY BEEN CAPTAIN MAN'S SIDEKICK FOR A SHORT TIME, I REALLY-- [ MUSIC .]
SERIOUSLY? THEY'RE PLAYING ME OFF? I THINK THERE WAS A TIME LIMIT.
LOOK OVER HERE.
HELLO.
HI.
HEY, JASPER, DID YOU NOTICE OUR NEW SKINNY JEANS? THEY'RE LIKE REGULAR JEANS, BUT SUPER TIGHT.
GIRLS LOVE THEM.
YEAH, I DON'T KNOW.
[ LAUGHING .]
OH, HI GIRLS.
LADIES.
THANKS FOR THE SNOW CONES.
YEAH, NICE CONES.
COME ON, LET'S TAKE A WALK AROUND SWELLVIEW POND.
I'VE BEEN WEARING THE WRONG PANTS.
YOUR PROBLEMS ARE WAY BIGGER THAN YOUR PANTS.
I GOT TO START SOMEWHERE.
HEY, CAPTAIN MAN.
OUR CAR'S READY.
THEN LET'S RIDE.
WAIT, CAPTAIN MAN! CAPTAIN MAN! YES, YOU IN THE LOOSE PANTS.
WILL YOU SIGN MY CAPTAIN MAN ACTION FIGURE? SURE.
JUST BRING IT UP HERE AND I'D BE GLAD TO-- [ GASPS .]
[ GROANS .]
IT HIT HIM IN THE MOUTH! SORRY, CAPTAIN MAN! NO WORRIES.
I'M OKAY! CAPTAIN MAN.
WHAT? BLOOD.
WHY DO YOU HAVE A BLOODY THUMB? I DON'T.
YOU HAVE A BLOODY LIP FROM THAT TOY HITTING YOU IN THE FACE.
BUT BUT THAT'S IMPOSSIBLE.
I CAN'T BE INJURED.
I'M CAPTAIN MAN.
WELL, CAPTAIN MAN'S LIP IS BLEEDING.
HENRY.
YEAH? I'M NOT OKAY.
SHH.
IT ALL JUST KIND OF HAPPENED.
MY DAD WAS AN IRRESPONSIBLE SCIENTIST.
I WANTED AN AFTERSCHOOL JOB.
AND BY ACCIDENT, HE MADE ME INDESTRUCTIBLE.
AH! I WENT INTO THIS CRAZY STORE AND ME A PRETTY INTERESTING GUY.
I'M GOING TO BLOW YOUR MIND.
NOW I PROTEC THE GOOD CITIZENS OF SWELLVIEW, WHO CALL ME HE TURNED OUT TO BE YOU KNOW THE NAME.
CAPTAIN MAN! THAT'S RIGHT, HENRY.
IN TIME, I REALIZED THA BEING A SUPERHERO IS A LOT TO HANDLE ALONE.
HE WANTED SOME HELP.
I NEEDED A SIDEKICK.
I, HENRY HART PLEDGE TO NEVER EVER EVER TELL ANYONE THAT I'M CAPTAIN MAN'S SECRET SIDEKICK.
IT IS DONE.
NOW WE BLOW BUBBLES.
AND FIGHT CRIME.
FEELS GOOD.
CALL IT.
UP THE TUBE! AH, MY BOOT.
HA! COME ON, GOOCH, HOW MANY OF THESE TESTS ARE WE GOING TO DO? SHUSH.
NOW, REMOVE YOUR RIGHT GLOVE, THEN HOLD UP YOUR HAND.
THIS IS GETTING ON MY NERVES NOW.
HOLD IN THE FIRE! OW, OW, OW! [ SCREAMING .]
DO YOU STILL FEEL THE PAIN IN YOUR HAND? YEAH.
I DON'T GET IT.
IT'S BEEN TWO SECONDS, THE PAIN SHOULD BE GONE BY NOW.
WE NEED MORE TESTS.
NO, WE'VE CHECKED ENOUGH OF MY BODY PARTS.
WHAT ABOUT HIS BUTT? OF MY BODY PARTS.
WHAT ABOUT HIS BUTT? CHECK HIS BUTT.
WHAT ABOUT HIS BUTT? CHECK HIS BUTT.
WE SHOULD CHECK YOUR BUTT.
CHECK HIS BUTT.
WE SHOULD CHECK YOUR BUTT.
CHECK MY BUTT HOW? WE SHOULD CHECK YOUR BUTT.
CHECK MY BUTT HOW? FACE THE OTHER WAY CHECK MY BUTT HOW? FACE THE OTHER WAY AND TOUCH YOUR TOES.
FACE THE OTHER WAY AND TOUCH YOUR TOES.
OH, NO, NO, NO.
AND TOUCH YOUR TOES.
OH, NO, NO, NO.
YOU'VE ALREADY STABBED MY NECK, OH, NO, NO, NO.
YOU'VE ALREADY STABBED MY NECK, POURED ACID ON MY FOOT, YOU'VE ALREADY STABBED MY NECK, POURED ACID ON MY FOOT, AND TOASTED MY HAND.
POURED ACID ON MY FOOT, AND TOASTED MY HAND.
I THINK WE CAN ALL ASSUME AND TOASTED MY HAND.
I THINK WE CAN ALL ASSUME I'M ALSO VULNERABLE I THINK WE CAN ALL ASSUME I'M ALSO VULNERABLE TO BUTT WOUNDS.
I'M ALSO VULNERABLE TO BUTT WOUNDS.
HEY, YOU GUYS TO BUTT WOUNDS.
HEY, YOU GUYS THIS IS GREAT FROZEN YOGURT.
HEY, YOU GUYS THIS IS GREAT FROZEN YOGURT.
HALF THAT YOGURT'S MINE.
GOOCH, WHAT'S GOING ON WITH ME? NO ONE'S BEEN ABLE TO INJURE ME WHAT'S GOING ON WITH ME? NO ONE'S BEEN ABLE TO INJURE ME SINCE I WAS EIGHT YEARS OLD.
NO ONE'S BEEN ABLE TO INJURE ME SINCE I WAS EIGHT YEARS OLD.
HEY, EVERYBODY, SINCE I WAS EIGHT YEARS OLD.
HEY, EVERYBODY, COME LOOK AT THIS.
HEY, EVERYBODY, COME LOOK AT THIS.
WHAT'S UP? COME LOOK AT THIS.
WHAT'S UP? WATCH THIS NEWS FOOTAGE WHAT'S UP? WATCH THIS NEWS FOOTAGE FROM THE AWARD THING YESTERDAY.
WATCH THIS NEWS FOOTAGE FROM THE AWARD THING YESTERDAY.
HERE, I'LL PLAY I FROM THE AWARD THING YESTERDAY.
HERE, I'LL PLAY I IN SLOW MOTION.
THERE.
SEE RIGHT THERE? YOU SEE THAT WOMAN SEE RIGHT THERE? YOU SEE THAT WOMAN WITH THE PERFUME? YOU SEE THAT WOMAN WITH THE PERFUME? SHE INTENTIONALLY SPRAYED ME.
WITH THE PERFUME? SHE INTENTIONALLY SPRAYED ME.
BUT PERFUME WOULDN' SHE INTENTIONALLY SPRAYED ME.
BUT PERFUME WOULDN' MAKE YOU LOSE YOUR POWERS.
BUT PERFUME WOULDN' MAKE YOU LOSE YOUR POWERS.
TRUE.
MAKE YOU LOSE YOUR POWERS.
TRUE.
PERFUME WOULDN'T.
TRUE.
PERFUME WOULDN'T.
ONLY THE TEARS PERFUME WOULDN'T.
ONLY THE TEARS OF THE JOLLY BEETLE.
ONLY THE TEARS OF THE JOLLY BEETLE.
JOLLY WHAT? THERE.
THE JOLLY BEETLE.
ONE OF THE RARES THE JOLLY BEETLE.
ONE OF THE RARES AND HAPPIEST BUGS ON EARTH.
ONE OF THE RARES AND HAPPIEST BUGS ON EARTH.
SO, YOU GUYS ARE SAYING AND HAPPIEST BUGS ON EARTH.
SO, YOU GUYS ARE SAYING THAT A JOLLY BEETLE SO, YOU GUYS ARE SAYING THAT A JOLLY BEETLE CAN TAKE AWAY THAT A JOLLY BEETLE CAN TAKE AWAY CAPTAIN MAN'S POWER? CAN TAKE AWAY CAPTAIN MAN'S POWER? NOT THE BEETLE ITSELF.
CAPTAIN MAN'S POWER? NOT THE BEETLE ITSELF.
THE BEETLE'S TEARS.
NOT THE BEETLE ITSELF.
THE BEETLE'S TEARS.
YOU SEE, WHEN THEY CRY, THE BEETLE'S TEARS.
YOU SEE, WHEN THEY CRY, THEIR TEARS CONTAIN AN ENZYME, YOU SEE, WHEN THEY CRY, THEIR TEARS CONTAIN AN ENZYME, LIKE AN ACID THAT BREAKS DOWN THEIR TEARS CONTAIN AN ENZYME, LIKE AN ACID THAT BREAKS DOWN MOLECULAR DENSITY.
LIKE AN ACID THAT BREAKS DOWN MOLECULAR DENSITY.
AND MOLECULAR DENSITY MOLECULAR DENSITY.
AND MOLECULAR DENSITY IS WHAT MAKES AND MOLECULAR DENSITY IS WHAT MAKES CAPTAIN MAN UNDAMAGEABLE.
IS WHAT MAKES CAPTAIN MAN UNDAMAGEABLE.
AND YOU GUYS THINK THA CAPTAIN MAN UNDAMAGEABLE.
AND YOU GUYS THINK THA THAT LADY'S PERFUME AND YOU GUYS THINK THA THAT LADY'S PERFUME CONTAINED THE TEARS THAT LADY'S PERFUME CONTAINED THE TEARS OF A JOLLY BEETLE.
CONTAINED THE TEARS OF A JOLLY BEETLE.
AH, THAT'S IMPOSSIBLE.
OF A JOLLY BEETLE.
AH, THAT'S IMPOSSIBLE.
TO FILL A WHOLE PERFUME BOTTLE, AH, THAT'S IMPOSSIBLE.
TO FILL A WHOLE PERFUME BOTTLE, YOU'D NEED TEARS TO FILL A WHOLE PERFUME BOTTLE, YOU'D NEED TEARS FROM DOZENS OF JOLLY BEETLES.
YOU'D NEED TEARS FROM DOZENS OF JOLLY BEETLES.
AND THEY WOULD FROM DOZENS OF JOLLY BEETLES.
AND THEY WOULD ALL HAVE TO BE CRYING.
AND THEY WOULD ALL HAVE TO BE CRYING.
BUT IF THOSE BEETLES ALL HAVE TO BE CRYING.
BUT IF THOSE BEETLES ARE SO JOLLY, BUT IF THOSE BEETLES ARE SO JOLLY, WHAT WOULD MAKE THEM CRY? [ CRYING BEETLES .]
NURSE COHORT, TURN UP THE MOVIE'S VOLUME.
BUT DADDY, I LOVE ELMER.
HE'S MY BEST FRIEND.
BUT HE'S A WILD ANIMAL.
HE'S MY BEST FRIEND.
BUT HE'S A WILD ANIMAL.
WE'VE GOT TO LET HIM GO.
BUT HE'S A WILD ANIMAL.
WE'VE GOT TO LET HIM GO.
BUT MAMA SAID WE'VE GOT TO LET HIM GO.
BUT MAMA SAID I COULD KEEP HIM FOREVER.
BUT MAMA SAID I COULD KEEP HIM FOREVER.
YOUR MAMA'S GONE, SON.
I COULD KEEP HIM FOREVER.
YOUR MAMA'S GONE, SON.
AND SHE AIN'T COMING BACK.
YOUR MAMA'S GONE, SON.
AND SHE AIN'T COMING BACK.
I KNOW.
AND SHE AIN'T COMING BACK.
I KNOW.
IT'S TIME, BOY.
I KNOW.
IT'S TIME, BOY.
OKAY.
GO ON, ELMER.
GO ON NOW.
GET! GO ON NOW.
GET! GO ON! GET! GO ON! [ BOY CRYING .]
GO ON! [ BOY CRYING .]
LOOK AT THIS.
[ BOY CRYING .]
LOOK AT THIS.
ALL MY BEETLES ARE CRYING.
LOOK AT THIS.
ALL MY BEETLES ARE CRYING.
MAKING MORE TEARS.
[ GRUNTING .]
[ PHONE DINGS .]
HEY, I GOT A NEWS ALERT.
IT SAYS A TIGER HEY, I GOT A NEWS ALERT.
IT SAYS A TIGER ESCAPED FROM THE ZOO.
IT SAYS A TIGER ESCAPED FROM THE ZOO.
SHH.
ESCAPED FROM THE ZOO.
SHH.
JASPER'S PUTTING ON SHH.
JASPER'S PUTTING ON THE SKINNY JEANS.
JASPER'S PUTTING ON THE SKINNY JEANS.
A TIGER COULD EAT YOUR MOM.
THE SKINNY JEANS.
A TIGER COULD EAT YOUR MOM.
[ GRUNTING .]
A TIGER COULD EAT YOUR MOM.
[ GRUNTING .]
THESE ARE TOO TIGHT.
[ GRUNTING .]
THESE ARE TOO TIGHT.
WELL, IF YOU WAN THESE ARE TOO TIGHT.
WELL, IF YOU WAN TO GET GIRLS, WELL, IF YOU WAN TO GET GIRLS, YOU GOT TO GET THOSE JEANS ON.
TO GET GIRLS, YOU GOT TO GET THOSE JEANS ON.
I'M TRYING.
YOU GOT TO GET THOSE JEANS ON.
I'M TRYING.
TRY HARDER.
HELLO, BOYS.
HOW ARE THE JEANS FITTING? HE CAN'T GET THEM ON.
HOW ARE THE JEANS FITTING? HE CAN'T GET THEM ON.
HE DOESN'T WANT I HE CAN'T GET THEM ON.
HE DOESN'T WANT I BAD ENOUGH.
HE DOESN'T WANT I BAD ENOUGH.
I DO TOO.
BAD ENOUGH.
I DO TOO.
ALL RIGHT, DON'T STRESS.
I DO TOO.
ALL RIGHT, DON'T STRESS.
I'M HERE TO HELP.
OH.
NEVAEH, CANDY, LITTLE HELP? YOU'RE CALLING FOR BACKUP? NEVAEH, CANDY, LITTLE HELP? YOU'RE CALLING FOR BACKUP? I KNOW WHAT I'M DOING.
YOU'RE CALLING FOR BACKUP? I KNOW WHAT I'M DOING.
HURRY IN.
I KNOW WHAT I'M DOING.
HURRY IN.
EVERYBODY, GRAB AND PULL.
HURRY IN.
EVERYBODY, GRAB AND PULL.
[ GRUNTING .]
EVERYBODY, GRAB AND PULL.
[ GRUNTING .]
OW! [ GRUNTING .]
OW! EDDIE, WE NEED THE JEAN HORN! OW! EDDIE, WE NEED THE JEAN HORN! THESE JEANS ARE, LIKE, EDDIE, WE NEED THE JEAN HORN! THESE JEANS ARE, LIKE, TWO SIZES TOO SMALL.
THESE JEANS ARE, LIKE, TWO SIZES TOO SMALL.
NO, THEY'RE NOT.
TWO SIZES TOO SMALL.
NO, THEY'RE NOT.
GIVE IT.
NO, THEY'RE NOT.
GIVE IT.
OKAY, SO, HOW IS THIS GIVE IT.
OKAY, SO, HOW IS THIS GOING TO WORK? OKAY, SO, HOW IS THIS GOING TO WORK? PULL HARDER.
GOING TO WORK? PULL HARDER.
OKAY.
PULL HARDER.
OKAY.
SUCK IN.
OKAY.
SUCK IN.
I AM.
I AM.
SUCK IN.
I AM.
I AM.
COME ON, JASPER! I AM.
I AM.
COME ON, JASPER! JASPER! COME ON, JASPER! JASPER! I'M INHALING.
JASPER! I'M INHALING.
OKAY, SAY, "I LOVE FASHION.
" I'M INHALING.
OKAY, SAY, "I LOVE FASHION.
" I LOVE FASHION.
OKAY, SAY, "I LOVE FASHION.
" I LOVE FASHION.
"I LOVE FASHION.
" I LOVE FASHION.
"I LOVE FASHION.
" I LOVE IT! "I LOVE FASHION.
" I LOVE IT! [ GRUNTS .]
THEY'RE ON.
GO SHOW YOUR FRIENDS.
YEAH.
THOSE ARE SKINNY JEANS.
I THINK THOSE ARE SKINNY JEANS.
I THINK THEY COULD BE TIGHTER.
CAPTAIN MAN? HEY, CAPTAIN MAN! CAPTAIN MAN TO THE MAN CAVE.
HEY, CAPTAIN MAN! CAPTAIN MAN TO THE MAN CAVE.
CAPTAIN MAN TO THE MAN CAVE.
CAPTAIN MAN TO THE MAN CAVE.
CAPTAIN MAN TO THE MAN CAVE.
HEY.
CAPTAIN MAN TO THE MAN CAVE.
HEY.
WHAT, GOOCH? HEY.
WHAT, GOOCH? WHY HAVEN'T YOU LEFT YET? WHAT, GOOCH? WHY HAVEN'T YOU LEFT YET? THE TIGER ROAMS FREE.
WHY HAVEN'T YOU LEFT YET? THE TIGER ROAMS FREE.
I'M WAITING FOR RAY.
THE TIGER ROAMS FREE.
I'M WAITING FOR RAY.
I'M COMING.
WHAT ARE YOU WEARING? JUST, YOU KNOW, SOME EXTRA PROTECTION.
JUST, YOU KNOW, SOME EXTRA PROTECTION.
YOU DON'T NEED SOME EXTRA PROTECTION.
YOU DON'T NEED EXTRA PROTECTION, YOU DON'T NEED EXTRA PROTECTION, YOU'RE CAPTAIN MAN.
EXTRA PROTECTION, YOU'RE CAPTAIN MAN.
BUT I CAN BE INJURED NOW.
YOU'RE CAPTAIN MAN.
BUT I CAN BE INJURED NOW.
WELL, YOU'RE STILL BUT I CAN BE INJURED NOW.
WELL, YOU'RE STILL A GREAT FIGHTER.
WELL, YOU'RE STILL A GREAT FIGHTER.
TIGERS CAN BE VICIOUS.
A GREAT FIGHTER.
TIGERS CAN BE VICIOUS.
MAYBE THIS ONE'S NICE.
TIGERS CAN BE VICIOUS.
MAYBE THIS ONE'S NICE.
I MEAN, COME ON.
MAYBE THIS ONE'S NICE.
I MEAN, COME ON.
LET'S NOT STEREOTYPE ALL TIGERS.
I MEAN, COME ON.
LET'S NOT STEREOTYPE ALL TIGERS.
DO YOU KNOW LAST NIGH LET'S NOT STEREOTYPE ALL TIGERS.
DO YOU KNOW LAST NIGH I WENT ACROSS THE STREET, DO YOU KNOW LAST NIGH I WENT ACROSS THE STREET, A BEE STUNG ME? I WENT ACROSS THE STREET, A BEE STUNG ME? AND NOW I GOT A RED BUMP.
A BEE STUNG ME? AND NOW I GOT A RED BUMP.
DID YOU PROVOKE THE BEE? AND NOW I GOT A RED BUMP.
DID YOU PROVOKE THE BEE? YEAH, HENRY.
DID YOU PROVOKE THE BEE? YEAH, HENRY.
I WAS FLIRTING YEAH, HENRY.
I WAS FLIRTING WITH THE BEE'S GIRLFRIEND.
I WAS FLIRTING WITH THE BEE'S GIRLFRIEND.
I WAS ALL "ZZZ ZZZ" WITH THE BEE'S GIRLFRIEND.
I WAS ALL "ZZZ ZZZ" AND SHE WAS ALL "ZZZ ZZZ.
" I WAS ALL "ZZZ ZZZ" AND SHE WAS ALL "ZZZ ZZZ.
" RAY, IT'S OUR JOB AND SHE WAS ALL "ZZZ ZZZ.
" RAY, IT'S OUR JOB TO PROTECT SWELLVIEW.
RAY, IT'S OUR JOB TO PROTECT SWELLVIEW.
OH, FACE IT, KID, TO PROTECT SWELLVIEW.
OH, FACE IT, KID, I'VE LOST IT.
OH, FACE IT, KID, I'VE LOST IT.
I CAN'T PROTECT SWELLVIEW.
I'VE LOST IT.
I CAN'T PROTECT SWELLVIEW.
I COULDN'T PROTECT A DUCK I CAN'T PROTECT SWELLVIEW.
I COULDN'T PROTECT A DUCK FROM A CHINESE RESTAURANT.
I COULDN'T PROTECT A DUCK FROM A CHINESE RESTAURANT.
RAY.
FROM A CHINESE RESTAURANT.
RAY.
YOU GO ON WITHOUT ME.
RAY.
YOU GO ON WITHOUT ME.
GO ON NOW, GET! [ GRUNTS .]
UGH, I CAN'T EAT ANYMORE.
OH, YEAH I CAN.
[ BEEPING .]
HEY, KID, WHERE YOU BEEN? I WAS PULLING A BIG FOREIGN LADY I WAS PULLING A BIG FOREIGN LADY OUT OF A SWAMP A BIG FOREIGN LADY OUT OF A SWAMP BY MYSELF OUT OF A SWAMP BY MYSELF ALONE BY MYSELF ALONE LIKE I'VE BEEN DOING EVERYTHING ALONE LIKE I'VE BEEN DOING EVERYTHING FOR THE PAST TWO DAYS.
LIKE I'VE BEEN DOING EVERYTHING FOR THE PAST TWO DAYS.
YOU WANT SOME MEAT? FOR THE PAST TWO DAYS.
YOU WANT SOME MEAT? NO, I DON'T WAN YOU WANT SOME MEAT? NO, I DON'T WAN YOUR CANNED MEAT.
NO, I DON'T WAN YOUR CANNED MEAT.
I WANT YOU YOUR CANNED MEAT.
I WANT YOU TO GET OFF YOUR BUT I WANT YOU TO GET OFF YOUR BUT AND GET BACK IN THE GAME.
TO GET OFF YOUR BUT AND GET BACK IN THE GAME.
I WANT CAPTAIN MAN.
AND GET BACK IN THE GAME.
I WANT CAPTAIN MAN.
SORRY.
I WANT CAPTAIN MAN.
SORRY.
SAY HI TO CAPTAIN COUCH.
[ SCREAMING .]
[ DING .]
YOU GUYS, I FOUND SOMETHING.
WHAT DID YOU FIND? OKAY, RAY LOST HIS POWER WHAT DID YOU FIND? OKAY, RAY LOST HIS POWER BECAUSE HE GOT SPRAYED OKAY, RAY LOST HIS POWER BECAUSE HE GOT SPRAYED WITH TEARS FROM A JOLLY BEETLE.
BECAUSE HE GOT SPRAYED WITH TEARS FROM A JOLLY BEETLE.
YEAH, YEAH, WITH TEARS FROM A JOLLY BEETLE.
YEAH, YEAH, I THINK WE'RE ALL AWARE YEAH, YEAH, I THINK WE'RE ALL AWARE OF WHAT'S HAPPENED I THINK WE'RE ALL AWARE OF WHAT'S HAPPENED UP TO THIS POINT.
OF WHAT'S HAPPENED UP TO THIS POINT.
JUST TELL US WHAT YOU FOU-- UP TO THIS POINT.
JUST TELL US WHAT YOU FOU-- [ PHONE RINGS .]
WHAT? WHERE'S MOM? I DON'T KNOW.
WHERE'S MOM? I DON'T KNOW.
BUT I CAN'T TALK-- I DON'T KNOW.
BUT I CAN'T TALK-- I AM NOT OKAY! BUT I CAN'T TALK-- I AM NOT OKAY! YOU'VE NEVER EVER BEEN OKAY.
I AM NOT OKAY! YOU'VE NEVER EVER BEEN OKAY.
WHO'S THAT? YOU'VE NEVER EVER BEEN OKAY.
WHO'S THAT? JUST MY DUMB SISTER.
WHO'S THAT? JUST MY DUMB SISTER.
I HEARD THAT.
JUST MY DUMB SISTER.
I HEARD THAT.
PIPER, I-- I HEARD THAT.
PIPER, I-- MY FRIEND MARLA PIPER, I-- MY FRIEND MARLA TOOK A PIC OF ME MY FRIEND MARLA TOOK A PIC OF ME AND I LOOKED REALLY BAD IN IT.
TOOK A PIC OF ME AND I LOOKED REALLY BAD IN IT.
OH NO.
AND I LOOKED REALLY BAD IN IT.
OH NO.
AND SHE PROMISED ME OH NO.
AND SHE PROMISED ME SHE WOULDN'T POST IT, AND SHE PROMISED ME SHE WOULDN'T POST IT, BUT THEN SHE DID POST I SHE WOULDN'T POST IT, BUT THEN SHE DID POST I AND SHE TAGGED ME.
BUT THEN SHE DID POST I AND SHE TAGGED ME.
WOW, TELL ME MORE.
AND SHE TAGGED ME.
WOW, TELL ME MORE.
THIS IS THE THIRD TIME-- WOW, TELL ME MORE.
THIS IS THE THIRD TIME-- OKAY, TELL US THIS IS THE THIRD TIME-- OKAY, TELL US WHAT YOU FOUND OUT.
OKAY, TELL US WHAT YOU FOUND OUT.
THAT JOLLY BEETLES WHAT YOU FOUND OUT.
THAT JOLLY BEETLES ONLY EAT ONE THING.
THAT JOLLY BEETLES ONLY EAT ONE THING.
WHAT? ONLY EAT ONE THING.
WHAT? JAPANESE FISH FLAKES.
WHAT? JAPANESE FISH FLAKES.
FISH FLAKES? JAPANESE FISH FLAKES.
FISH FLAKES? YEAH.
FISH FLAKES? YEAH.
AND TWO WEEKS AGO, YEAH.
AND TWO WEEKS AGO, 100 POUNDS OF THEM AND TWO WEEKS AGO, 100 POUNDS OF THEM WERE SHIPPED TO A WAREHOUSE 100 POUNDS OF THEM WERE SHIPPED TO A WAREHOUSE RIGHT HERE IN SWELLVIEW.
WERE SHIPPED TO A WAREHOUSE RIGHT HERE IN SWELLVIEW.
A LOAD OF FISH FLAKES RIGHT HERE IN SWELLVIEW.
A LOAD OF FISH FLAKES THAT BIG WOULD FEED A LOAD OF FISH FLAKES THAT BIG WOULD FEED DOZENS OF JOLLY BEETLES.
THAT BIG WOULD FEED DOZENS OF JOLLY BEETLES.
AND WHO WOULD NEED TO HAVE DOZENS OF JOLLY BEETLES.
AND WHO WOULD NEED TO HAVE THAT MANY JOLLY BEETLES? AND WHO WOULD NEED TO HAVE THAT MANY JOLLY BEETLES? SOMEONE WHO NEEDED THAT MANY JOLLY BEETLES? SOMEONE WHO NEEDED A LOT OF JOLLY BEETLE TEARS.
SOMEONE WHO NEEDED A LOT OF JOLLY BEETLE TEARS.
ENOUGH TO SPRAY CAPTAIN MAN.
A LOT OF JOLLY BEETLE TEARS.
ENOUGH TO SPRAY CAPTAIN MAN.
HENRY, ARE YOU LISTENING? ENOUGH TO SPRAY CAPTAIN MAN.
HENRY, ARE YOU LISTENING? ONE SEC.
HENRY, ARE YOU LISTENING? ONE SEC.
HENRY? ONE SEC.
HENRY? SHE DID? HENRY? SHE DID? NO WAY.
THEN WHAT HAPPENED? SHE DID? NO WAY.
THEN WHAT HAPPENED? WHERE'S THE WAREHOUSE? NO WAY.
THEN WHAT HAPPENED? WHERE'S THE WAREHOUSE? DOWNTOWN, ABBEY ROAD.
WHERE'S THE WAREHOUSE? DOWNTOWN, ABBEY ROAD.
RAY, LET'S GO.
DOWNTOWN, ABBEY ROAD.
RAY, LET'S GO.
NO.
RAY, LET'S GO.
NO.
I CAN'T FIGHT BAD GUYS NO.
I CAN'T FIGHT BAD GUYS IN MY CONDITION.
I CAN'T FIGHT BAD GUYS IN MY CONDITION.
IS HE SERIOUS? IN MY CONDITION.
IS HE SERIOUS? HE'S AFRAID NOW IS HE SERIOUS? HE'S AFRAID NOW BECAUSE HE CAN BE INJURED.
HE'S AFRAID NOW BECAUSE HE CAN BE INJURED.
WELL, WHO WOULDN'T BE AFRAID? BECAUSE HE CAN BE INJURED.
WELL, WHO WOULDN'T BE AFRAID? HOW ABOUT ME? WELL, WHO WOULDN'T BE AFRAID? HOW ABOUT ME? I'M YOUR SIDEKICK HOW ABOUT ME? I'M YOUR SIDEKICK AND I'VE BEEN HELPING YOU I'M YOUR SIDEKICK AND I'VE BEEN HELPING YOU DO ALL KINDS OF DANGEROUS STUFF, AND I'VE BEEN HELPING YOU DO ALL KINDS OF DANGEROUS STUFF, AND I NEVER HAD ANY POWERS.
DO ALL KINDS OF DANGEROUS STUFF, AND I NEVER HAD ANY POWERS.
I CAN BE HURT.
AND I NEVER HAD ANY POWERS.
I CAN BE HURT.
WHICH IS WHY I PAY YOU I CAN BE HURT.
WHICH IS WHY I PAY YOU $9 AN HOUR.
WHICH IS WHY I PAY YOU $9 AN HOUR.
I'LL BE BACK.
$9 AN HOUR.
I'LL BE BACK.
WHERE YOU GOING? I'LL BE BACK.
WHERE YOU GOING? TO DO MY JOB.
WHERE YOU GOING? TO DO MY JOB.
MESSED UP.
TO DO MY JOB.
MESSED UP.
YEAH, YEAH, MARLA'S BAD MESSED UP.
YEAH, YEAH, MARLA'S BAD AND YOU'RE AMAZING.
YEAH, YEAH, MARLA'S BAD AND YOU'RE AMAZING.
THANK YOU.
AND YOU'RE AMAZING.
THANK YOU.
WELL? GO WITH HIM.
THANK YOU.
WELL? GO WITH HIM.
I CAN'T.
WELL? GO WITH HIM.
I CAN'T.
YOU MEAN YOU WON'T.
I CAN'T.
YOU MEAN YOU WON'T.
HAVE YOU SEEN MY BEE STING? YOU MEAN YOU WON'T.
HAVE YOU SEEN MY BEE STING? JUST FORGET IT.
HAVE YOU SEEN MY BEE STING? JUST FORGET IT.
I DON'T NEED CAPTAIN COUCH.
UP THE TUBE! LOOK, THE BEE HURT ME.
HOW DO THEY LOOK? YOU TELL ME.
WANT ME TO BE HONEST? YOU TELL ME.
WANT ME TO BE HONEST? THEY LOOK GREAT.
YOU GUYS, I NEED HELP.
WHAT'S WRONG? I CAN'T GE WHAT'S WRONG? I CAN'T GE MY SKINNY JEANS OFF.
I CAN'T GE MY SKINNY JEANS OFF.
WAIT.
MY SKINNY JEANS OFF.
WAIT.
YOU'VE BEEN WEARING THOSE WAIT.
YOU'VE BEEN WEARING THOSE FOR THREE DAYS STRAIGHT? YOU'VE BEEN WEARING THOSE FOR THREE DAYS STRAIGHT? YEAH.
FOR THREE DAYS STRAIGHT? YEAH.
AND I GOT TO GO TO THE BATHROOM.
YEAH.
AND I GOT TO GO TO THE BATHROOM.
HAVE YOU TRIED AND I GOT TO GO TO THE BATHROOM.
HAVE YOU TRIED PULLING REALLY HARD? HAVE YOU TRIED PULLING REALLY HARD? YES.
PULLING REALLY HARD? YES.
I'M OUT OF IDEAS.
YES.
YES, MY BEETLES.
WATCH THE SAD MOVIE.
YES, MY BEETLES.
WATCH THE SAD MOVIE.
ENJOY THE SAD MOVIE.
WATCH THE SAD MOVIE.
ENJOY THE SAD MOVIE.
[ CRYING BEETLES .]
ENJOY THE SAD MOVIE.
[ CRYING BEETLES .]
AH, DARN IT, HE'S DEAD.
[ CRYING BEETLES .]
AH, DARN IT, HE'S DEAD.
OH, YES.
AH, DARN IT, HE'S DEAD.
OH, YES.
SOON I'LL HAVE ENOUGH OH, YES.
SOON I'LL HAVE ENOUGH BEETLE TEARS TO ENSURE SOON I'LL HAVE ENOUGH BEETLE TEARS TO ENSURE THAT CAPTAIN MAN WILL NEVER BE BEETLE TEARS TO ENSURE THAT CAPTAIN MAN WILL NEVER BE A THREAT TO ME AGAIN.
THAT CAPTAIN MAN WILL NEVER BE A THREAT TO ME AGAIN.
AND THEN WHAT? A THREAT TO ME AGAIN.
AND THEN WHAT? WELL, THEN I CAN AND THEN WHAT? WELL, THEN I CAN DO WHATEVER I WAN WELL, THEN I CAN DO WHATEVER I WAN HERE IN SWELLVIEW.
DO WHATEVER I WAN HERE IN SWELLVIEW.
WELL, WHAT DO YOU WANT TO DO? HERE IN SWELLVIEW.
WELL, WHAT DO YOU WANT TO DO? I DON'T KNOW.
WELL, WHAT DO YOU WANT TO DO? I DON'T KNOW.
[ GRUNTS .]
OKAY, NOBODY MOVE.
WHO'S THAT BOY? EASY, DON'T GET NERVOUS.
WHO'S THAT BOY? EASY, DON'T GET NERVOUS.
IT'S JUST KID DUMPSTER.
EASY, DON'T GET NERVOUS.
IT'S JUST KID DUMPSTER.
THAT'S DANGER.
IT'S JUST KID DUMPSTER.
THAT'S DANGER.
I KNOW.
THAT'S DANGER.
I KNOW.
I WAS BEING DISRESPECTFUL.
I KNOW.
I WAS BEING DISRESPECTFUL.
ALLOW ME TO INTRODUCE MYSELF.
I WAS BEING DISRESPECTFUL.
ALLOW ME TO INTRODUCE MYSELF.
YEAH, I KNOW WHO YOU ARE.
ALLOW ME TO INTRODUCE MYSELF.
YEAH, I KNOW WHO YOU ARE.
DOCTOR MANIAC.
YEAH, I KNOW WHO YOU ARE.
DOCTOR MANIAC.
IT'S MINYAK.
DOCTOR MANIAC.
IT'S MINYAK.
I KNOW.
IT'S MINYAK.
I KNOW.
I WAS BEING DISRESPECTFUL.
IT'S OVER.
I'M TAKING YOU AND YOUR HOT NURSE TO JAIL.
I'M TAKING YOU AND YOUR HOT NURSE TO JAIL.
GOONS! AND NOW I THINK I SHALL HAVE TO TEACH YOU SOME MANNERS.
WHY DON'T YOU TEACH ME? CAPTAIN MAN! YOU ARE HANDSOME.
CAPTAIN MAN! YOU ARE HANDSOME.
AND YOU ARE YOU ARE HANDSOME.
AND YOU ARE CORRECT.
AND YOU ARE CORRECT.
HE MAY BE HANDSOME, CORRECT.
HE MAY BE HANDSOME, BUT HE CAN BE HURT NOW, HE MAY BE HANDSOME, BUT HE CAN BE HURT NOW, JUST LIKE ANY MAN.
YOU, HOLD THE BOY.
YOU, HURT HANDSOME.
OOH, I'M SO SCARED OF YOUR LITTLE CLUB.
WHAT DO YOU DO WITH THAT THING, OF YOUR LITTLE CLUB.
WHAT DO YOU DO WITH THAT THING, SPANK HAMSTERS? OH, NOW IT'S BIGGER.
GET HIM, CAPTAIN MAN! COME ON, I HAD TO.
CAPTAIN MAN, WATCH OUT! CAREFUL.
THESE ARE DANGEROUS.
YEAH! THAT WAS AWESOME! THANKS.
THAT WAS AWESOME! THANKS.
BUT IT REALLY HURT MY KNEE.
THANKS.
BUT IT REALLY HURT MY KNEE.
I'M GOING TO SEE TO I BUT IT REALLY HURT MY KNEE.
I'M GOING TO SEE TO I THAT MORE THAN YOUR KNEE HURTS.
I'M GOING TO SEE TO I THAT MORE THAN YOUR KNEE HURTS.
TAKE YOUR HANDS THAT MORE THAN YOUR KNEE HURTS.
TAKE YOUR HANDS OFF MY COFFEE MUG! TAKE YOUR HANDS OFF MY COFFEE MUG! NO.
OFF MY COFFEE MUG! NO.
KID DANGER? NO.
KID DANGER? YEAH? KID DANGER? YEAH? COUNT YOUR TOES.
NOW, KID DANGER AND I ARE GOING TO TAKE THESE BEETLES BACK TO MY HEADQUARTERS ARE GOING TO TAKE THESE BEETLES BACK TO MY HEADQUARTERS AND FIGURE OUT A WAY BACK TO MY HEADQUARTERS AND FIGURE OUT A WAY TO GET MY POWER BACK.
AND FIGURE OUT A WAY TO GET MY POWER BACK.
YOU'LL HAVE TO GET MY POWER BACK.
YOU'LL HAVE TO CATCH THEM FIRST.
THE BEETLES! NO! NO! TA-TA! CHEERIO! SEE YA! I SHALL RECUR! COME ON, WE GOT TO GO AFTER THEM.
NO! NO! WE GOT TO GO AFTER THEM.
NO! NO! THAT'S YOKONIUM GAS.
NO! NO! THAT'S YOKONIUM GAS.
IT'LL DESTROY THE BEETLES.
THAT'S YOKONIUM GAS.
IT'LL DESTROY THE BEETLES.
SO? IT'LL DESTROY THE BEETLES.
SO? WE NEED THE BEETLES SO? WE NEED THE BEETLES TO GET MY POWER BACK.
WE NEED THE BEETLES TO GET MY POWER BACK.
WE CAN'T LET THEM DIE.
OH NO.
THE GAS ALREADY KILLED THIS ONE.
SO, HOW DOES THIS WORK? YOU SEE, WHEN THE BEETLES WATCH SOMETHING FUNNY, YOU SEE, WHEN THE BEETLES WATCH SOMETHING FUNNY, THEY SECRETE EUPHORIC ACID, WATCH SOMETHING FUNNY, THEY SECRETE EUPHORIC ACID, WHICH WE CAN USE TO REVERSE THEY SECRETE EUPHORIC ACID, WHICH WE CAN USE TO REVERSE THE WEAKENING EFFEC WHICH WE CAN USE TO REVERSE THE WEAKENING EFFEC OF THE TEARS.
THE WEAKENING EFFEC OF THE TEARS.
YOU STARTED THAT FIGHT.
OF THE TEARS.
YOU STARTED THAT FIGHT.
YOU CALLING ME A LIAR? YOU STARTED THAT FIGHT.
YOU CALLING ME A LIAR? I AIN'T CALLING YOU YOU CALLING ME A LIAR? I AIN'T CALLING YOU A TRUTHER.
I AIN'T CALLING YOU A TRUTHER.
[ LAUGHING BEETLES .]
A TRUTHER.
[ LAUGHING BEETLES .]
[ SIGHING .]
[ LAUGHING BEETLES .]
[ SIGHING .]
CLASSIC.
[ SIGHING .]
CLASSIC.
CLASSIC.
CLASSIC.
CLASSIC.
AND NOW I EXTRACT THE FLUID.
CLASSIC.
AND NOW I EXTRACT THE FLUID.
AND THIS HAPPY BUG JUICE AND NOW I EXTRACT THE FLUID.
AND THIS HAPPY BUG JUICE IS REALLY GOING AND THIS HAPPY BUG JUICE IS REALLY GOING TO FIX CAPTAIN MAN? IS REALLY GOING TO FIX CAPTAIN MAN? WE HOPE.
TO FIX CAPTAIN MAN? WE HOPE.
IT BETTER.
WE HOPE.
IT BETTER.
COME ON, LET'S DO THIS.
IT BETTER.
COME ON, LET'S DO THIS.
READY? COME ON, LET'S DO THIS.
READY? SPRAY IN THE HOLE.
READY? SPRAY IN THE HOLE.
AH! OOH! THAT'S INTERESTING.
DID IT WORK? ONLY ONE WAY TO FIND OUT.
SETTING TO INTENSITY FIVE.
[ ALARM BEEPING .]
EMERGENCY.
SOMEBODY HELP ME, PLEASE! I CAN'T GET THESE JEANS OFF.
YOU HEAR THAT? I CAN'T GET THESE JEANS OFF.
YOU HEAR THAT? THERE'S A BOY WANDERING YOU HEAR THAT? THERE'S A BOY WANDERING THROUGH SWELLVIEW PARK THERE'S A BOY WANDERING THROUGH SWELLVIEW PARK TRAPPED IN HIS OWN PANTS.
THROUGH SWELLVIEW PARK TRAPPED IN HIS OWN PANTS.
SWELLVIEW NEEDS YOU.
TRAPPED IN HIS OWN PANTS.
SWELLVIEW NEEDS YOU.
OKAY, GOOCH.
SWELLVIEW NEEDS YOU.
OKAY, GOOCH.
TIME TO CHECK MY DENSITY.
OKAY, GOOCH.
TIME TO CHECK MY DENSITY.
LET'S SEE IF I GO TIME TO CHECK MY DENSITY.
LET'S SEE IF I GO MY CAPTAIN MAN BACK.
LET'S SEE IF I GO MY CAPTAIN MAN BACK.
YOU REALIZE IF THE BEETLES' MY CAPTAIN MAN BACK.
YOU REALIZE IF THE BEETLES' EUPHORIC ACID DIDN'T WORK YOU REALIZE IF THE BEETLES' EUPHORIC ACID DIDN'T WORK YOU SURE, RAY? EUPHORIC ACID DIDN'T WORK YOU SURE, RAY? BLAST ME.
YOU SURE, RAY? BLAST ME.
[ GRUNTING .]
I'M OKAY.
KID DANGER [ PHONE RINGS .]
UGH, IT'S MY LITTLE SISTER.
[ PHONE RINGS .]
UGH, IT'S MY LITTLE SISTER.
UGH.
UGH, IT'S MY LITTLE SISTER.
UGH.
WHAT, PIPER? UGH.
WHAT, PIPER? HENRY, MY FRIEND MARLA WHAT, PIPER? HENRY, MY FRIEND MARLA IS OUT OF CONTROL.
HENRY, MY FRIEND MARLA IS OUT OF CONTROL.
WOW.
IS OUT OF CONTROL.
WOW.
PLEASE TELL ME ALL ABOUT IT.
WOW.
PLEASE TELL ME ALL ABOUT IT.
LET'S GO.
CALL IT.
UP THE TUBE! I CAN'T TAKE IT! HELLO? HELLO? HENRY? I AM NOT OKAY!
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