Hot Streets (2016) s02e04 Episode Script

Bad Boy Bugs

Roach! Great, that means we're getting close to the bug nest.
- Eugh, I hate bugs.
- I'm gonna smoosh these bug boys.
I hate their bald heads, round eyes, and nasally voices.
Remember, French, not all bug boys are bad-boy bugs.
Some bug boys are good-boy bugs.
Shithead debt collector is calling about your student loans.
Uncle Mark, could I get paid for this mission? If you want money so bad, maybe you should get a real job instead of helping us for free like a sucker.
Yeah, get a job, deadbeat.
Sorry, I have a history with bugs.
I'll ask Jet Jr.
if we can pay you after this mission, but he's one tough little plane.
Now let's fight some gigantic, puffy, gooey, disgusting cockroaches.
Jen, you lead the way.
On second thought, maybe I should sit this one out.
- Jen's poor! [Chuckles] - French: Get some money, lady! Follow my lead.
Remember, only shoot bad-boy bug boys.
- Yeah, yeah.
- This our target leader of the bad boys, Krawler.
Don't shoot, I enjoy being like this.
[Buzzing] Ow! Ou ouch! Bad-boy bugs! Bad-boy bugs! Shoot! Shoot! [Gunshots fire, insects shriek] Krawler.
Hot Streets, I will rule the Bug Kingdom.
As soon as I kill the queen, the throne is mine.
[Weapons charge] [gunshots] Krawler escaped.
[Twig snaps] Die! Die! Die! You dumbass! Do you know what you just did? - You killed Magical John.
- He's a good bug boy? The best bug boy! Magical John is dead, you [bleep]ing asshole! Welcome to Benevolent Labs.
I'm Dr.
We're an independent facility specializing in making the world a better place.
Nothing sketchy here.
Thanks for hiring me for this experiment.
- So, when do I get paid? - Soon.
I'm grateful you're here.
Only one other person applied.
Jen Sanders, meet our other applicant.
Steven Davis?! You tried to kill my uncle once.
- You're a criminal.
- Oh, yeah, you're the good guy.
Your dog grabbed me and then you punched my 46-year-old tummy twice! Why are you here? I lost my medical practice thanks to you.
Actually it was kinda fraudulent, but this broad doesn't have to know.
- Now I'm broke.
Happy? - Yes! Now let's get this over with.
No pets or electronics allowed in the lab.
Ooh! Where are we going? Bug Town the city where good bugs live.
This is a waste of time.
Krawler's still out there.
Magical John was a truly gorgeous bug boy inside and out.
We owe it to his family to return his body.
Toughest part of the job.
[Whistles] [music] Excuse me, miss, I've never seen Bug Town so barren and lifeless.
Our queen, Grandma Bug, left to find an heir to the throne and never returned.
She used to sit there, filling the ravine with nectar, the life force of our people.
- Now, the town's dying.
- Hey! Hey, I'm scutterin' here! - Bug off! - Oh French! You're insulting the good-boy bugs and embarrassing me.
Just stick to story we rehearsed and we won't cause the family any more pain than necessary.
All right, all right.
[Bleep] bug boys.
Everyone comfortable? We want to make sure you're treated with the dignity you deserve.
Ah! Hey! [Chitters] Chuwwie! Use J.
to save me! Chuwwie! Hbbu-wbbu-whn.
Mmm! Ohh! Hoo-whoo.
No, wait.
No, no, no.
[Screams] [music] Hello, children.
The larvae you consume makes it possible for us to speak.
- I feel so calm.
- Yeah, I-I feel nice.
I've never felt nice before.
You are both nice, and very important.
- Can I call you Grandma? - Please, do.
Both: We love you, Grandma! Listen, children, I journeyed here to find an heir to my throne, but the selfishness and greed of your people have polluted your land.
Upon arriving, it made me sick, and darkness washed over me.
When I awoke, I found myself here.
You both must work together to return me to my city.
It's the only way to [Bell dings] [Both grunt, sigh] All went according to plan.
Let's debrief and discuss further financial opportunities.
I have to free Grandma.
My student debt can wait.
- Grandma wants me to help too.
- No way.
You're a con artist.
My heart is filled with Grandma's love.
I am an all-new Steven Davis.
Actually I am in it for the money.
I bet this big bug is worth a pretty penny.
- Excuse me? - Nothing! You'll see, I'm good now.
Psyche! [Chuckles] To think Magical John left behind six beautiful children.
It's important you know he died a hero.
He took out five of Krawler's goons before they got him.
It was an honorable death.
First our grandma leaves, and now my pop's is dead? It's all a lie! It was me, Donald! When I was a kid, a bee stung my dick and it made me hate all bugs.
It stung my dick and it hurt so bad.
The tweezers pushed the stinger in deeper.
But Magical John was a good-boy bug, and I killed him in the most dishonorable way possible.
- Please forgive me! - It's all pointless! Without Grandma's nectar, he doesn't have much time to live.
French, make amends.
Go to him.
We know you imprisoned Grandma to commit heinous - experiments on her.
- And we're here to stop you.
- But - We're taking her home, and there's nothing you can do about it, Chow! You've got it all wrong.
You can take the bug, no problem.
When we found her, she was injured and we didn't know how to help.
The whole point of the experiment was to find a way to communicate with her.
[Alarm blares] Security breach.
Security breach.
Bad-boy bugs! They must be here for Grandma.
We've got to get her out of here.
Quick, let's load her into my beautiful, zero-APR-financed, V8 Ford, F-250 pickup truck outside! These larvae allow you to speak with Grandma.
I'll hold them off.
Go! I know exactly what to do.
[Imitating robot] Excuse me, you looking for the bug? She went the opposite way, homes.
[Whispering] Yes! Ya nailed it, Chow! [Motor revs] She's getting worse.
Don't worry, I know a doctor from the criminal underground.
He specializes in bugs.
I'm not gonna take Grandma to one of your nasty criminal friends.
He's all-the-way legit, okay? And a nasty criminal, just like me.
Look at the buffet of tubes on this hot mama.
- All you can eat.
- This is your specialist? These are my tubes.
There are multiple uses for these tubes, some sexual, some just for smelling.
Can you tell I'm a bit of a tube guy? [Chuckles] I can.
You're into tubes.
- I love tubes.
- [Hushed] Krawler? I heard you're looking for a certain bug.
How much money are we talking here? So keep squeezing these tubes to drain the infection.
Now, as payment, I'll just take three of these nice tubes.
- What? - Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa.
Wait a minute.
Don't damage the merchandise.
I-I mean Grandma.
Aah! Aah! - So much for your "legit" doctor.
- I am a legit doctor.
Can't a legit doctor collect and [bleep] his bug tubes? He can't? You think you can just waltz in here and replace Magical John? He was gonna teach me how to fight all those bullies who pick on me 'cause of my handicap.
[Coughs] Hey, Scuttery Pete, why don't you put 'em up, show me your dukes? Keep squeezing, Chubbie! Hnngh-nngh! Hrrngh! Hrrn! - Halt! - Oh, darn, he found us.
Well, let's pull over.
Maybe Krawler's reasonable.
- [Bleep] that.
- Wha Oh, now you did it! [Tires squealing] Steven Davis, we had a deal! Davis and Krawler? Ugh! I knew I couldn't trust you.
I was only gonna sell her for some money, okay? Give a larva, I want to apologize to Grandma.
Gimme! Gimme! Give it! Come on, Jen! - Gimme! - Hands off! Ugh! Kill them! Kill them all! Ow! Oomph! Ow! Oohh! We're gonna be eaten, thanks to you.
When you're right, you're right! Hnn-nngh! Hnn-nnghhhh! I lied about being good before, but I really want to be good now.
- I'll change.
- Chubbie, squeeze these tubes like your life depends on it! [Triumphant music] - You did it, Chubbie! - Whoo! Whoo-whoo-whoo-whoo-whee! W'eugh! The nectar's almost completely gone now.
- Scuttery Pete?! - He doesn't have much time now.
We need Grandma to return.
Did somebody order a grandma? [Cheers and applause] Jen? Steven Davis?! That's right, I'm also here.
Stop hogging the limelight, Jen.
[music] [Cheering] Grandma! Yeah! That throne belongs to me! There is only one bug standing in my way.
[Whoosh!] Amazing! The bad-boy bugs are turning into good-boy bugs.
And I'm changing, too.
I'm finally nice, for real.
Huh, what do you know? I'm a little good boy now.
Krawler: Fools! My heart is far too evil to be affected by Grandma's Magical Wave of Love.
What do you think you're doing? Yeah! Beat the shit out of him, Scuttery Pete! Nyahh! H'yoo! Yeah, [bleep] him up.
[Groans] [Gunshots fire] That'll teach 'im! Grandma's dying.
I want to say goodbye, but we're out of larvae.
Jen, I snuck one away to sell later.
Here, take it.
You deserve it.
Grandma's love did change you.
I hid it in my butthole.
The reason why I journeyed to your land was to find an heir.
I choose you, Jen Sanders, to be queen of the bugs - for all of eternity.
- [Bleep].
All of eternity? What'd she say? She probably hates me for what I've done.
Actually, she chose you as her heir.
The new king of the bugs! I will forever be king of the bugs! I finally talked to Jet Jr.
, and he agreed to pay you $900 for that bug mission.
Wow! $900? [Doorbell rings] I'm not king of the bugs anymore.
I got bored, okay? I didn't like it.