Impractical Jokers (2017) s03e08 Episode Script
Inside the Vault
ARE YOU READY FOR SOME EXCLUSIVE, NEVER-BEFORE-SEEN "IMPRACTICAL JOKERS" CLIPS? EXCLUSIVE, NEVER-BEFORE-SEEN "IMPRACTICAL JOKERS" CLIPS? YES, WE ARE! "IMPRACTICAL JOKERS" CLIPS? YES, WE ARE! THAT'S RIGHT.
YES, WE ARE! THAT'S RIGHT.
WE WENT DOWN TO THE "JOKERS" THAT'S RIGHT.
WE WENT DOWN TO THE "JOKERS" VAULT AND PULLED OUT SOME WE WENT DOWN TO THE "JOKERS" VAULT AND PULLED OUT SOME NEVER-BEFORE-SEEN CHALLENGES.
VAULT AND PULLED OUT SOME NEVER-BEFORE-SEEN CHALLENGES.
WHAT IS "JOKERS" VAULT? NEVER-BEFORE-SEEN CHALLENGES.
WHAT IS "JOKERS" VAULT? IT'S THE PLACE DOWNSTAIRS WHAT IS "JOKERS" VAULT? IT'S THE PLACE DOWNSTAIRS WHERE WE KEEP ALL THE STUFF IT'S THE PLACE DOWNSTAIRS WHERE WE KEEP ALL THE STUFF THEY'VE NEVER SEEN.
WHERE WE KEEP ALL THE STUFF THEY'VE NEVER SEEN.
THE VAULT, BUDDY.
THEY'VE NEVER SEEN.
THE VAULT, BUDDY.
YOU GUYS HAVE ALL BEEN TO A THE VAULT, BUDDY.
YOU GUYS HAVE ALL BEEN TO A "JOKERS" VAULT? YOU GUYS HAVE ALL BEEN TO A "JOKERS" VAULT? YOU'VE NEVER BEEN TO THE "JOKERS" VAULT? YOU'VE NEVER BEEN TO THE VAULT? YOU'VE NEVER BEEN TO THE VAULT? WE'RE HAVING A CRAZY PARTY VAULT? WE'RE HAVING A CRAZY PARTY THERE NEXT WEEKEND.
WE'RE HAVING A CRAZY PARTY THERE NEXT WEEKEND.
YEAH, MAN.
I CAN'T WAIT! THERE NEXT WEEKEND.
YEAH, MAN.
I CAN'T WAIT! YOU'RE HAVING A VAULT PARTY? YEAH, MAN.
I CAN'T WAIT! YOU'RE HAVING A VAULT PARTY? VAULT PARTIES! YOU'RE HAVING A VAULT PARTY? VAULT PARTIES! AM I INVITED?! VAULT PARTIES! AM I INVITED?! ANYWAY, STICK AROUND TOWARDS AM I INVITED?! ANYWAY, STICK AROUND TOWARDS THE END OF THE EPISODE, WHERE ANYWAY, STICK AROUND TOWARDS THE END OF THE EPISODE, WHERE WE'LL SHOW YOU WHAT HAPPENS WHEN THE END OF THE EPISODE, WHERE WE'LL SHOW YOU WHAT HAPPENS WHEN ONE MAN FINDS OUT THAT HE IS ON WE'LL SHOW YOU WHAT HAPPENS WHEN ONE MAN FINDS OUT THAT HE IS ON "IMPRACTICAL JOKERS.
" ONE MAN FINDS OUT THAT HE IS ON "IMPRACTICAL JOKERS.
" AND WE'LL SEE YOU AT THE "IMPRACTICAL JOKERS.
" AND WE'LL SEE YOU AT THE VAULT PARTY.
AND WE'LL SEE YOU AT THE VAULT PARTY.
I'LL BE THERE.
VAULT PARTY.
I'LL BE THERE.
UH I'LL BE THERE.
UH I'LL BE THERE.
UH I'LL BE THERE.
[ CHUCKLES .]
I'LL BE THERE.
[ CHUCKLES .]
PREPARE FOR SOMETHING [ CHUCKLES .]
PREPARE FOR SOMETHING AMAZING.
PREPARE FOR SOMETHING AMAZING.
HEY, MUSTACHE, WHAT'S UP? AMAZING.
HEY, MUSTACHE, WHAT'S UP? [ LAUGHTER .]
HEY, MUSTACHE, WHAT'S UP? [ LAUGHTER .]
I WANT MY MOMMY! [ LAUGHTER .]
I WANT MY MOMMY! [ LAUGHTER .]
I WANT MY MOMMY! [ LAUGHTER .]
I WILL NEVER FORGIVE YOU! [ LAUGHTER .]
I WILL NEVER FORGIVE YOU! LARRY! I WILL NEVER FORGIVE YOU! LARRY! [ LAUGHTER .]
OH, HEY, FELLAS.
YEAH.
DO YOU REMEMBER WHEN WE YEAH.
DO YOU REMEMBER WHEN WE WORKED AT THE PIZZERIA? DO YOU REMEMBER WHEN WE WORKED AT THE PIZZERIA? OH, OF COURSE.
ONE SLICE? Q, GET AWKWARDLY CLOSE TO THIS GUY AND JUST STARE INTO Q, GET AWKWARDLY CLOSE TO THIS GUY AND JUST STARE INTO HIS EYES.
TO THIS GUY AND JUST STARE INTO HIS EYES.
[ LAUGHTER .]
HIS EYES.
[ LAUGHTER .]
[ Laughing .]
KEEP STARING.
[ LAUGHTER .]
[ Laughing .]
KEEP STARING.
THIS GUY'S LOOKING BACK INTO [ Laughing .]
KEEP STARING.
THIS GUY'S LOOKING BACK INTO Q's SOUL.
THIS GUY'S LOOKING BACK INTO Q's SOUL.
YEAH, HE'S NOT GONNA LIKE Q's SOUL.
YEAH, HE'S NOT GONNA LIKE WHAT HE SEES.
YEAH, HE'S NOT GONNA LIKE WHAT HE SEES.
[ LAUGHTER .]
WHAT HE SEES.
[ LAUGHTER .]
YOU KNOW WHAT I'D LOVE TO YOU KNOW WHAT I'D LOVE TO SEE? SAL AND JOE'S UNAIRED TURNS FROM SEE? SAL AND JOE'S UNAIRED TURNS FROM THAT CHALLENGE.
SAL AND JOE'S UNAIRED TURNS FROM THAT CHALLENGE.
OH, I'D LOVE TO SEE THAT, THAT CHALLENGE.
OH, I'D LOVE TO SEE THAT, TOO.
OH, I'D LOVE TO SEE THAT, TOO.
LET'S SEE IT.
SAL, YOU WORKED IN A PIZZERIA FOR FOUR YEARS? FOR FOUR YEARS? [ CHUCKLES .]
YEAH.
DOES THAT GIVE YOU AN ADVANTAGE TODAY? ADVANTAGE TODAY? NO.
NO.
YOU KNOW THE LINGO, THE WAY THINGS ARE DONE.
YOU KNOW THE LINGO, THE WAY THINGS ARE DONE.
OH, YOU MEAN LIKE "PIZZA" AND THINGS ARE DONE.
OH, YOU MEAN LIKE "PIZZA" AND "SODA"? OH, YOU MEAN LIKE "PIZZA" AND "SODA"? [ LAUGHTER .]
"SODA"? [ LAUGHTER .]
HOW YOU DOING, BUD? [ LAUGHTER .]
HOW YOU DOING, BUD? SURE.
THE CORNERS? HOW YOU DOING, BUD? SURE.
THE CORNERS? YEAH.
SURE.
THE CORNERS? YEAH.
ALL RIGHT, SAL, JUST SLAP YEAH.
ALL RIGHT, SAL, JUST SLAP EVERYTHING THAT YOU SERVE THIS ALL RIGHT, SAL, JUST SLAP EVERYTHING THAT YOU SERVE THIS GUY.
EVERYTHING THAT YOU SERVE THIS GUY.
[ Chuckling .]
SLAP IT? GUY.
[ Chuckling .]
SLAP IT? JUST SLAP IT WITH YOUR HAND.
[ Chuckling .]
SLAP IT? JUST SLAP IT WITH YOUR HAND.
[ CHUCKLES .]
[ CHUCKLES .]
[ LAUGHS .]
SO, YOU GOT THESE TWO, AND YOU GOT THAT ONE.
YOU GOT THAT ONE.
ONE, TWO, THREE.
ONE, TWO, THREE.
[ LAUGHTER .]
[ LAUGHTER .]
HUH? HUH? THIS ONE'S NOT YOURS? THIS ONE'S NOT YOURS? NO, NO, I DON'T WANT THEM NO, NO, I DON'T WANT THEM 'CAUSE YOU PUT YOUR HANDS ON 'CAUSE YOU PUT YOUR HANDS ON THEM.
THEM.
OH, I'M SORRY.
IT'S A HABIT.
OH, I'M SORRY.
IT'S A HABIT.
OKAY.
OKAY.
THE FIRST ONE'S FINE, THOUGH? THE FIRST ONE'S FINE, THOUGH? [ LAUGHTER .]
SAL, GET YOUR FINGER IN [ LAUGHTER .]
SAL, GET YOUR FINGER IN HIS WATER.
SAL, GET YOUR FINGER IN HIS WATER.
AND THEN, YOU GOT THAT, AND HIS WATER.
AND THEN, YOU GOT THAT, AND THEN YOU GOT THE WATER HERE, AND THEN, YOU GOT THAT, AND THEN YOU GOT THE WATER HERE, RIGHT.
THEN YOU GOT THE WATER HERE, RIGHT.
[ LAUGHTER .]
RIGHT.
[ LAUGHTER .]
THAT'S YOURS.
HEY, HOW ARE YOU? SAL, EVERYTHING THEY SAY, SAY SAL, EVERYTHING THEY SAY, SAY "AGAIN WITH THIS [BLEEP.]
" [ LAUGHTER .]
"AGAIN WITH THIS [BLEEP.]
" [ LAUGHTER .]
LET ME GET TWO SLICES.
[ LAUGHTER .]
LET ME GET TWO SLICES.
YEAH, ONE OF THESE.
LET ME GET TWO SLICES.
YEAH, ONE OF THESE.
[ SIGHS .]
AGAIN WITH THIS YEAH, ONE OF THESE.
[ SIGHS .]
AGAIN WITH THIS [BLEEP.]
[ SIGHS .]
AGAIN WITH THIS [BLEEP.]
[ LAUGHTER .]
[ SIGHS .]
AGAIN WITH THIS [BLEEP.]
[ LAUGHTER .]
[BLEEP.]
[ LAUGHTER .]
TO GO OR TO STAY? [ LAUGHTER .]
TO GO OR TO STAY? STAY.
TO GO OR TO STAY? STAY.
DO IT AGAIN.
STAY.
DO IT AGAIN.
[ LAUGHS .]
DO IT AGAIN.
[ LAUGHS .]
[ GROANS .]
[ LAUGHS .]
[ GROANS .]
AND YOU WANT TO HEAT ONE OF [ GROANS .]
AND YOU WANT TO HEAT ONE OF THESE UP FOR HERE, RIGHT? AND YOU WANT TO HEAT ONE OF THESE UP FOR HERE, RIGHT? AGAIN WITH THIS [BLEEP.]
[ LAUGHTER .]
HOW YOU DOING, BUD? THIS ONE? HOW YOU DOING, BUD? THIS ONE? YEAH.
THIS ONE? YEAH.
SAL, GRAB HIS HAND, AND SCOOP YEAH.
SAL, GRAB HIS HAND, AND SCOOP IT RIGHT INTO HIS HAND.
SAL, GRAB HIS HAND, AND SCOOP IT RIGHT INTO HIS HAND.
DON'T USE THE CUP AT ALL.
IT RIGHT INTO HIS HAND.
DON'T USE THE CUP AT ALL.
[ LAUGHTER .]
DON'T USE THE CUP AT ALL.
[ LAUGHTER .]
UH, IT'S JUST TWO BUCKS.
UH, IT'S JUST TWO BUCKS.
OH, LET ME SEE.
DO YOU WANT TWO SCOOPS OR ONE? TWO SCOOPS? MEDIUM? TWO SCOOPS? MEDIUM? [ LAUGHTER .]
[ LAUGHTER .]
TWO.
TWO.
[ LAUGHTER .]
HE STAYED THERE FOR THE SECOND SCOOP.
YEAH.
SECOND SCOOP.
YEAH.
LIKE, AT ONE, YOU'D BE LIKE, YEAH.
LIKE, AT ONE, YOU'D BE LIKE, "DUDE.
" LIKE, AT ONE, YOU'D BE LIKE, "DUDE.
" AS LONG AS YOU DO SOMETHING "DUDE.
" AS LONG AS YOU DO SOMETHING WITH CONFIDENCE AS LONG AS YOU DO SOMETHING WITH CONFIDENCE YEAH.
WITH CONFIDENCE YEAH.
THEY'RE LIKE, "AM I THE YEAH.
THEY'RE LIKE, "AM I THE CRAZY ONE?" THEY'RE LIKE, "AM I THE CRAZY ONE?" I'LL TELL YOU WHAT I NOTICED CRAZY ONE?" I'LL TELL YOU WHAT I NOTICED FROM THAT CLIP IS THE WAY YOU I'LL TELL YOU WHAT I NOTICED FROM THAT CLIP IS THE WAY YOU AND I SAY "WATER" IS HORRIBLE.
FROM THAT CLIP IS THE WAY YOU AND I SAY "WATER" IS HORRIBLE.
"WATA.
" AND I SAY "WATER" IS HORRIBLE.
"WATA.
" "WATA.
OH, YOU WANT SOME "WATA.
" "WATA.
OH, YOU WANT SOME WATA? "WATA.
OH, YOU WANT SOME WATA? PUT YOUR FINGER IN THAT WATA.
" WATA? PUT YOUR FINGER IN THAT WATA.
" HOW DO YOU SPELL "WATER"? PUT YOUR FINGER IN THAT WATA.
" HOW DO YOU SPELL "WATER"? W-A-T-A.
HOW DO YOU SPELL "WATER"? W-A-T-A.
[ LAUGHTER .]
W-A-T-A.
[ LAUGHTER .]
IT'S WEIRD.
[ LAUGHTER .]
IT'S WEIRD.
WHEN I'M NOT AROUND YOU, I HAVE IT'S WEIRD.
WHEN I'M NOT AROUND YOU, I HAVE WHEN I'M NOT AROUND YOU, I HAVE IT'S VERY BIZARRE.
IT'S VERY BIZARRE.
SAL, TURN AWAY FOR A SECOND.
IT'S VERY BIZARRE.
SAL, TURN AWAY FOR A SECOND.
[ British accent .]
WELL, SAL, TURN AWAY FOR A SECOND.
[ British accent .]
WELL, HELLO.
[ British accent .]
WELL, HELLO.
JOLLY GOOD.
HELLO.
JOLLY GOOD.
[ Jersey accent .]
EH, WHAT'S JOLLY GOOD.
[ Jersey accent .]
EH, WHAT'S GOING ON AROUND HERE? [ Jersey accent .]
EH, WHAT'S GOING ON AROUND HERE? [ LAUGHS .]
GOING ON AROUND HERE? [ LAUGHS .]
OKAY, WE SAW MINE.
[ LAUGHS .]
OKAY, WE SAW MINE.
WHY DON'T WE WATCH JOE'S? OKAY, WE SAW MINE.
WHY DON'T WE WATCH JOE'S? MM-HMM.
WHY DON'T WE WATCH JOE'S? MM-HMM.
WHAT KIND OF WEIRD MM-HMM.
WHAT KIND OF WEIRD PIZZA-MAKING IS THAT? WHAT KIND OF WEIRD PIZZA-MAKING IS THAT? [ LAUGHTER .]
HI.
CAN I HELP YOU? COULD I JUST HAVE A REGULAR SLICE? COULD I JUST HAVE A REGULAR SLICE? ONE REGULAR SLICE? SLICE? ONE REGULAR SLICE? DOM, ONE REGULAR SLICE.
ONE REGULAR SLICE? DOM, ONE REGULAR SLICE.
JOE, HIT THE DOUGH AND YELL DOM, ONE REGULAR SLICE.
JOE, HIT THE DOUGH AND YELL OUT ETHNICITIES.
JOE, HIT THE DOUGH AND YELL OUT ETHNICITIES.
[ SIGHS .]
OUT ETHNICITIES.
[ SIGHS .]
ETHIOPIANS.
[ SIGHS .]
ETHIOPIANS.
[ LAUGHTER .]
[ LAUGHTER .]
MEXICANS.
OH, NO, IT'S JUST A LITTLE BIT OF EVERYBODY.
BIT OF EVERYBODY.
EVERYBODY TODAY'S BUSTING MY EVERYBODY TODAY'S BUSTING MY HUMP.
HUMP.
FILIPINOS.
FILIPINOS.
[ LAUGHTER .]
DO YOU WANT GARLIC KNOTS? [ LAUGHTER .]
DO YOU WANT GARLIC KNOTS? UKRAINIANS.
DO YOU WANT GARLIC KNOTS? UKRAINIANS.
[ LAUGHTER .]
CHE SI DICE, MY MAN? WHAT'S UP? CAN I HAVE A VANILLA CHIP? JOE, NOSE THE ICE.
CAN I HAVE A VANILLA CHIP? JOE, NOSE THE ICE.
[ LAUGHTER .]
JOE, NOSE THE ICE.
[ LAUGHTER .]
WHAT'S THE OTHER FLAVOR? [ LAUGHTER .]
WHAT'S THE OTHER FLAVOR? RAINBOW.
WHAT'S THE OTHER FLAVOR? RAINBOW.
RAINBOW.
RAINBOW.
RAINBOW.
[ DING! .]
RAINBOW.
[ DING! .]
[ LAUGHS .]
[ DING! .]
[ LAUGHS .]
[ CHUCKLES .]
REALLY DEEP.
[ LAUGHS .]
[ CHUCKLES .]
REALLY DEEP.
[ LAUGHS .]
[ CHUCKLES .]
REALLY DEEP.
[ LAUGHS .]
HE'S LOOKING AT HIM.
[ LAUGHS .]
HE'S LOOKING AT HIM.
[ DING! .]
HE'S LOOKING AT HIM.
[ DING! .]
[ LAUGHTER .]
[ DING! .]
[ LAUGHTER .]
[ DING! .]
[ LAUGHTER .]
[ DING! .]
[ LAUGHTER .]
[ DING! .]
[ LAUGHTER .]
SALUTE.
[ LAUGHTER .]
SALUTE.
[ LAUGHTER .]
HI.
CAN I HELP YOU? WHAT DO YOU NEED? JOE, KEEP LOOKING OUT THE JOE, KEEP LOOKING OUT THE WINDOW LIKE GODZILLA'S COMING.
ONE SLICE OF PIZZA? WINDOW LIKE GODZILLA'S COMING.
ONE SLICE OF PIZZA? [ Laughing .]
IS THAT GODZILLA ONE SLICE OF PIZZA? [ Laughing .]
IS THAT GODZILLA OUTSIDE? [ Laughing .]
IS THAT GODZILLA OUTSIDE? [ LAUGHTER .]
OUTSIDE? [ LAUGHTER .]
DID YOU WANT A LOT OF ICE OR [ LAUGHTER .]
DID YOU WANT A LOT OF ICE OR A LITTLE BIT OF ICE? DID YOU WANT A LOT OF ICE OR A LITTLE BIT OF ICE? [ LAUGHTER .]
A LITTLE BIT OF ICE? [ LAUGHTER .]
GODZILLA'S GETTING CLOSE, [ LAUGHTER .]
GODZILLA'S GETTING CLOSE, BUDDY.
GODZILLA'S GETTING CLOSE, BUDDY.
[ LAUGHS .]
BUDDY.
[ LAUGHS .]
JOE, YOU'RE TOO SCARED TO [ LAUGHS .]
JOE, YOU'RE TOO SCARED TO MOVE.
JOE, YOU'RE TOO SCARED TO MOVE.
[ LAUGHTER .]
MOVE.
[ LAUGHTER .]
OH, OH.
HOLY [BLEEP.]
[ LAUGHTER .]
OH, OH.
HOLY [BLEEP.]
SO, THAT'S $4.
75.
OH, OH.
HOLY [BLEEP.]
SO, THAT'S $4.
75.
JOE, WHAT -- WHAT IS THAT? SO, THAT'S $4.
75.
JOE, WHAT -- WHAT IS THAT? WHAT? JOE, WHAT -- WHAT IS THAT? WHAT? SO, YOU ONLY NEED TWO OF -- WHAT? SO, YOU ONLY NEED TWO OF -- [ LAUGHTER .]
OH, THERE WAS SOMETHING COMING OUT OF THAT WINDOW, MAN.
WOW.
[ LAUGHS .]
OUT OF THAT WINDOW, MAN.
WOW.
[ LAUGHS .]
WHAT'S THAT? WOW.
[ LAUGHS .]
WHAT'S THAT? [ LAUGHTER .]
WHAT'S THAT? [ LAUGHTER .]
I WANT TO GO JUST BACK TO THAT [ LAUGHTER .]
I WANT TO GO JUST BACK TO THAT GUY FOR A SECOND.
I WANT TO GO JUST BACK TO THAT GUY FOR A SECOND.
HE DIDN'T ASK FOR A NEW ICE.
GUY FOR A SECOND.
HE DIDN'T ASK FOR A NEW ICE.
NO.
HE DIDN'T ASK FOR A NEW ICE.
NO.
HE GAVE THAT ICE TO THE NO.
HE GAVE THAT ICE TO THE PERSON.
HE GAVE THAT ICE TO THE PERSON.
YOU GOT YOUR NOSE, YOU -- PERSON.
YOU GOT YOUR NOSE, YOU -- I WAS SMELLING RAINBOWS FOR A YOU GOT YOUR NOSE, YOU -- I WAS SMELLING RAINBOWS FOR A WEEK AND A HALF.
I WAS SMELLING RAINBOWS FOR A WEEK AND A HALF.
[ LAUGHTER .]
WEEK AND A HALF.
[ LAUGHTER .]
STICK WITH US 'CAUSE WHEN WE [ LAUGHTER .]
STICK WITH US 'CAUSE WHEN WE COME BACK, WE'LL TAKE A LOOK AT STICK WITH US 'CAUSE WHEN WE COME BACK, WE'LL TAKE A LOOK AT Q AND MURR'S TURN AS JANITORS IN COME BACK, WE'LL TAKE A LOOK AT Q AND MURR'S TURN AS JANITORS IN A FOOD COURT.
Q AND MURR'S TURN AS JANITORS IN A FOOD COURT.
STRAIGHT FROM THE VAULT.
A FOOD COURT.
STRAIGHT FROM THE VAULT.
WHAT IS THIS VAULT? STRAIGHT FROM THE VAULT.
WHAT IS THIS VAULT? [ CHUCKLES .]
HEY, WE'RE BACK, AND WE'RE TAKING A LOOK AT NEVER-BEFORE-SEEN CLIPS FROM TAKING A LOOK AT NEVER-BEFORE-SEEN CLIPS FROM THIS "IMPRACTICAL JOKERS" NEVER-BEFORE-SEEN CLIPS FROM THIS "IMPRACTICAL JOKERS" VAULT? THIS "IMPRACTICAL JOKERS" VAULT? THE VAULT, MAN.
VAULT? THE VAULT, MAN.
THAT'S WHERE WE KEEP ALL THIS.
THE VAULT, MAN.
THAT'S WHERE WE KEEP ALL THIS.
I DON'T KNOW ABOUT THIS THAT'S WHERE WE KEEP ALL THIS.
I DON'T KNOW ABOUT THIS THING.
I DON'T KNOW ABOUT THIS THING.
YOU GUYS REMEMBER WHEN WE THING.
YOU GUYS REMEMBER WHEN WE WERE AT OUR FAVORITE PLACE, YOU GUYS REMEMBER WHEN WE WERE AT OUR FAVORITE PLACE, WORKING AS JANITORS -- THE FOOD WERE AT OUR FAVORITE PLACE, WORKING AS JANITORS -- THE FOOD COURT? WORKING AS JANITORS -- THE FOOD COURT? OH, YEAH! COURT? OH, YEAH! SAL, TAPE THE FORK TO THE END OF OH, YEAH! SAL, TAPE THE FORK TO THE END OF YOUR BROOM, AND EAT OFF SAL, TAPE THE FORK TO THE END OF YOUR BROOM, AND EAT OFF SOMEBODY'S PLATE.
YOUR BROOM, AND EAT OFF SOMEBODY'S PLATE.
OH, MY GOD, THERE HE GOES! SOMEBODY'S PLATE.
OH, MY GOD, THERE HE GOES! OH, HE GOT ONE! OH, MY GOD, THERE HE GOES! OH, HE GOT ONE! [ LAUGHTER .]
OH, HE GOT ONE! [ LAUGHTER .]
WE KNOW WHAT JOE AND I DID [ LAUGHTER .]
WE KNOW WHAT JOE AND I DID THERE.
WE KNOW WHAT JOE AND I DID THERE.
WHY DON'T WE TAKE A LOOK AT WHAT THERE.
WHY DON'T WE TAKE A LOOK AT WHAT Q AND MURR DID AT THE FOOD WHY DON'T WE TAKE A LOOK AT WHAT Q AND MURR DID AT THE FOOD COURT? Q AND MURR DID AT THE FOOD COURT? OOH.
LOOK AT Q.
IT LOOKS LIKE THE OPENING CREDITS TO, LIKE, A BAD '90s IT LOOKS LIKE THE OPENING CREDITS TO, LIKE, A BAD '90s HORROR MOVIE CALLED CREDITS TO, LIKE, A BAD '90s HORROR MOVIE CALLED "THE CUSTODIAN.
" HORROR MOVIE CALLED "THE CUSTODIAN.
" [ LAUGHTER .]
"THE CUSTODIAN.
" [ LAUGHTER .]
Q, SEE THIS COUPLE EATING? [ LAUGHTER .]
Q, SEE THIS COUPLE EATING? KNEEL DOWN, AND LEAN INTO THEM.
Q, SEE THIS COUPLE EATING? KNEEL DOWN, AND LEAN INTO THEM.
AND I WANT YOU TO, LIKE, TELL KNEEL DOWN, AND LEAN INTO THEM.
AND I WANT YOU TO, LIKE, TELL THEM A SECRET I'M ABOUT TO TELL AND I WANT YOU TO, LIKE, TELL THEM A SECRET I'M ABOUT TO TELL YOU.
THEM A SECRET I'M ABOUT TO TELL YOU.
FOLKS, FOLKS, FOLKS.
YOU.
FOLKS, FOLKS, FOLKS.
DID YOU HEAR THE STORY OF THE FOLKS, FOLKS, FOLKS.
DID YOU HEAR THE STORY OF THE LITTLE GIRL WHO ATE HERE LAST DID YOU HEAR THE STORY OF THE LITTLE GIRL WHO ATE HERE LAST WEEK? LITTLE GIRL WHO ATE HERE LAST WEEK? DID YOU GUYS HEAR THE STORY WEEK? DID YOU GUYS HEAR THE STORY OF THE LITTLE GIRL WHO ATE HERE DID YOU GUYS HEAR THE STORY OF THE LITTLE GIRL WHO ATE HERE LAST WEEK? OF THE LITTLE GIRL WHO ATE HERE LAST WEEK? NO? LAST WEEK? NO? OKAY.
TELL THEM, BUDDY.
NO? OKAY.
TELL THEM, BUDDY.
[ LAUGHS .]
OKAY.
TELL THEM, BUDDY.
[ LAUGHS .]
YEAH, THE LITTLE GIRL, THAT'S YEAH, THE LITTLE GIRL, THAT'S RIGHT, WHO ATE HERE LAST WEEK.
TURNS OUT THAT, UH, SHE WAS 18.
RIGHT, WHO ATE HERE LAST WEEK.
TURNS OUT THAT, UH, SHE WAS 18.
SO, I TOTALLY TURNS OUT THAT, UH, SHE WAS 18.
SO, I TOTALLY HIT IT.
SO, I TOTALLY HIT IT.
[ LAUGHTER .]
HIT IT.
[ LAUGHTER .]
HEY.
[ LAUGHTER .]
HEY.
BOOM.
HEY.
BOOM.
[ LAUGHTER .]
BOOM.
[ LAUGHTER .]
TURNED OUT SHE WAS 18, WHICH IS [ LAUGHTER .]
TURNED OUT SHE WAS 18, WHICH IS LEGAL.
TURNED OUT SHE WAS 18, WHICH IS LEGAL.
[ LAUGHTER .]
LEGAL.
[ LAUGHTER .]
WAIT, HE JUST WINKED! [ LAUGHTER .]
WAIT, HE JUST WINKED! GO OVER TO THE COUPLE.
WAIT, HE JUST WINKED! GO OVER TO THE COUPLE.
YOUR TRASH BIN'S A LITTLE GO OVER TO THE COUPLE.
YOUR TRASH BIN'S A LITTLE FULL, Q.
YOUR TRASH BIN'S A LITTLE FULL, Q.
HOW 'BOUT YOU EMPTY GARBAGE FULL, Q.
HOW 'BOUT YOU EMPTY GARBAGE ONTO THE TABLE INSTEAD OF TAKING HOW 'BOUT YOU EMPTY GARBAGE ONTO THE TABLE INSTEAD OF TAKING IT OFF? ONTO THE TABLE INSTEAD OF TAKING IT OFF? [ LAUGHTER .]
IT OFF? [ LAUGHTER .]
KEEP GOING.
KEEP GOING.
[ LAUGHTER .]
KEEP GOING.
KEEP GOING.
[ LAUGHTER .]
KEEP GOING.
KEEP GOING.
[ LAUGHTER .]
HER EYES ARE, LIKE, BULGING OUT [ LAUGHTER .]
HER EYES ARE, LIKE, BULGING OUT OF HER HEAD.
HER EYES ARE, LIKE, BULGING OUT OF HER HEAD.
[ LAUGHTER .]
THEY ARE BOTH USING THE "I'M BUSY SIPPING, I DON'T NOTICE THIS" DEFENSE.
BUSY SIPPING, I DON'T NOTICE THIS" DEFENSE.
OH! THIS" DEFENSE.
OH! [ ALL CHEER .]
OH! [ ALL CHEER .]
[ LAUGHTER .]
[ ALL CHEER .]
[ LAUGHTER .]
I DO LIKE THAT THEY REVERTED [ LAUGHTER .]
I DO LIKE THAT THEY REVERTED TO THE "WHAT? WE'RE JUST I DO LIKE THAT THEY REVERTED TO THE "WHAT? WE'RE JUST SIPPING.
TO THE "WHAT? WE'RE JUST SIPPING.
WHAT'S HAPPENING AROUND US?" SIPPING.
WHAT'S HAPPENING AROUND US?" MUCH LIKE WHAT MY PARENTS DID WHAT'S HAPPENING AROUND US?" MUCH LIKE WHAT MY PARENTS DID WITH ME MY ENTIRE CHILDHOOD.
MUCH LIKE WHAT MY PARENTS DID WITH ME MY ENTIRE CHILDHOOD.
"HOW LONG TILL IT GOES AWAY?" WITH ME MY ENTIRE CHILDHOOD.
"HOW LONG TILL IT GOES AWAY?" [ LAUGHTER .]
"HOW LONG TILL IT GOES AWAY?" [ LAUGHTER .]
YOUR PARENTS HAD 25 YEARS OF [ LAUGHTER .]
YOUR PARENTS HAD 25 YEARS OF JUST SIPPING THROUGH STRAWS.
YOUR PARENTS HAD 25 YEARS OF JUST SIPPING THROUGH STRAWS.
"WHAT SHOULD WE DO ABOUT OUR JUST SIPPING THROUGH STRAWS.
"WHAT SHOULD WE DO ABOUT OUR SON?" "WHAT SHOULD WE DO ABOUT OUR SON?" "DON'T WORRY ABOUT IT, HONEY.
" SON?" "DON'T WORRY ABOUT IT, HONEY.
" [ LAUGHTER .]
"DON'T WORRY ABOUT IT, HONEY.
" [ LAUGHTER .]
ALL RIGHT.
[ LAUGHTER .]
ALL RIGHT.
NOW LET'S SEE WHAT MURR GOT INTO ALL RIGHT.
NOW LET'S SEE WHAT MURR GOT INTO WHEN HE WAS A JANITOR.
NOW LET'S SEE WHAT MURR GOT INTO WHEN HE WAS A JANITOR.
OH, YEAH.
ALL RIGHT, MURR, THESE THREE GUYS, THEIR TABLE'S DIRTY, AIN'T IT? GUYS, THEIR TABLE'S DIRTY, AIN'T IT? YEAH, AS A MATTER OF FACT, I IT? YEAH, AS A MATTER OF FACT, I DON'T THINK IT'S EVER GONNA GET YEAH, AS A MATTER OF FACT, I DON'T THINK IT'S EVER GONNA GET CLEAN.
DON'T THINK IT'S EVER GONNA GET CLEAN.
YEAH, YOU SHOULD CLEAN THAT CLEAN.
YEAH, YOU SHOULD CLEAN THAT TABLE BUT NEVER BE FINISHED YEAH, YOU SHOULD CLEAN THAT TABLE BUT NEVER BE FINISHED CLEANING THAT TABLE.
[ LAUGHTER .]
REALLY REACH, BRO.
REALLY REACH.
REALLY REACH, BRO.
REALLY REACH.
[ GRUNTS .]
REALLY REACH.
[ GRUNTS .]
LAY ON IT.
[ GRUNTS .]
LAY ON IT.
LAY ON THE TABLE.
LAY ON IT.
LAY ON THE TABLE.
[ LAUGHTER .]
LAY ON THE TABLE.
[ LAUGHTER .]
DUDE, GET THAT BALD GUY'S [ LAUGHTER .]
DUDE, GET THAT BALD GUY'S HEAD.
DUDE, GET THAT BALD GUY'S HEAD.
GET IT.
GET IT.
HEAD.
GET IT.
GET IT.
NO? GET IT.
GET IT.
NO? I'LL GET IT, I'LL GET IT.
NO? I'LL GET IT, I'LL GET IT.
THANK YOU, SIR.
I'LL GET IT, I'LL GET IT.
THANK YOU, SIR.
I'LL GET IT.
THANK YOU, SIR.
I'LL GET IT.
IT'S RIGHT ON THE SIDE.
I'LL GET IT.
IT'S RIGHT ON THE SIDE.
I CAN SEE IT.
IT'S RIGHT ON THE SIDE.
I CAN SEE IT.
I TRIED, I TRIED.
I CAN SEE IT.
I TRIED, I TRIED.
I SEE A STAIN, I GOT TO CLEAN I TRIED, I TRIED.
I SEE A STAIN, I GOT TO CLEAN IT.
I SEE A STAIN, I GOT TO CLEAN IT.
[ LAUGHTER .]
IT.
[ LAUGHTER .]
MURR, I WANT YOU TO APPROACH [ LAUGHTER .]
MURR, I WANT YOU TO APPROACH THE GUY IN THE WHITE T-SHIRT.
MURR, I WANT YOU TO APPROACH THE GUY IN THE WHITE T-SHIRT.
I'M GONNA HAVE YOU SHAKE HIS THE GUY IN THE WHITE T-SHIRT.
I'M GONNA HAVE YOU SHAKE HIS HAND.
I'M GONNA HAVE YOU SHAKE HIS HAND.
HI, GUYS.
HAND.
HI, GUYS.
I GOT TO SHAKE YOUR HAND.
HI, GUYS.
I GOT TO SHAKE YOUR HAND.
"CAUGHT A PEEK IN THE I GOT TO SHAKE YOUR HAND.
"CAUGHT A PEEK IN THE URINAL -- VERY IMPRESSIVE.
" "CAUGHT A PEEK IN THE URINAL -- VERY IMPRESSIVE.
" I'LL TELL YOU WHAT.
URINAL -- VERY IMPRESSIVE.
" I'LL TELL YOU WHAT.
I CAUGHT A PEEK AT THE I'LL TELL YOU WHAT.
I CAUGHT A PEEK AT THE URINALS -- IMPRESSIVE.
I CAUGHT A PEEK AT THE URINALS -- IMPRESSIVE.
[ LAUGHTER .]
URINALS -- IMPRESSIVE.
[ LAUGHTER .]
IT'S TRUE WHAT THEY SAY.
[ LAUGHTER .]
IT'S TRUE WHAT THEY SAY.
[ LAUGHTER .]
IT'S TRUE WHAT THEY SAY.
[ LAUGHTER .]
THE UNIFORM LETS YOU GET [ LAUGHTER .]
THE UNIFORM LETS YOU GET AWAY WITH SO MUCH.
THE UNIFORM LETS YOU GET AWAY WITH SO MUCH.
RIGHT.
AWAY WITH SO MUCH.
RIGHT.
WIPING THOSE GUYS' TABLE RIGHT.
WIPING THOSE GUYS' TABLE DOWN, YOU WOULD NEVER GET AWAY WIPING THOSE GUYS' TABLE DOWN, YOU WOULD NEVER GET AWAY WITH THAT.
DOWN, YOU WOULD NEVER GET AWAY WITH THAT.
THAT'S WHY I'VE STARTED TO WITH THAT.
THAT'S WHY I'VE STARTED TO WEAR SHIRTS EVERYWHERE THAT SAY THAT'S WHY I'VE STARTED TO WEAR SHIRTS EVERYWHERE THAT SAY MY NAME ON IT.
WEAR SHIRTS EVERYWHERE THAT SAY MY NAME ON IT.
OH, THAT'S YOU.
YOU DO THAT.
MY NAME ON IT.
OH, THAT'S YOU.
YOU DO THAT.
[ LAUGHTER .]
OH, THAT'S YOU.
YOU DO THAT.
[ LAUGHTER .]
IS THAT WHY -- IT MAKES YOUR [ LAUGHTER .]
IS THAT WHY -- IT MAKES YOUR LIFE BETTER? IS THAT WHY -- IT MAKES YOUR LIFE BETTER? THIS IS FROM THE GAS STATION.
LIFE BETTER? THIS IS FROM THE GAS STATION.
LOOKS LIKE IT.
THIS IS FROM THE GAS STATION.
LOOKS LIKE IT.
ALL RIGHT.
LOOKS LIKE IT.
ALL RIGHT.
WHEN WE COME BACK, WE ARE GOING ALL RIGHT.
WHEN WE COME BACK, WE ARE GOING TO SHOW YOU A BRAND-NEW WHEN WE COME BACK, WE ARE GOING TO SHOW YOU A BRAND-NEW "IMPRACTICAL JOKERS" CHALLENGE.
TO SHOW YOU A BRAND-NEW "IMPRACTICAL JOKERS" CHALLENGE.
AND WHAT HAPPENS WHEN WE TELL "IMPRACTICAL JOKERS" CHALLENGE.
AND WHAT HAPPENS WHEN WE TELL THIS GUY THAT HE WAS ON AND WHAT HAPPENS WHEN WE TELL THIS GUY THAT HE WAS ON "IMPRACTICAL JOKERS"? THIS GUY THAT HE WAS ON "IMPRACTICAL JOKERS"? HELLO, THERE.
SO, GUYS, I WAS POKING AROUND THE VAULT, AND GUESS WHAT I FOUND.
THE VAULT, AND GUESS WHAT I FOUND.
LOVE THAT VAULT! FOUND.
LOVE THAT VAULT! I LOVE THAT VAULT.
LOVE THAT VAULT! I LOVE THAT VAULT.
I FOUND A FULL CHALLENGE! I LOVE THAT VAULT.
I FOUND A FULL CHALLENGE! WHAT?! I FOUND A FULL CHALLENGE! WHAT?! NOT ONE TURN OR TWO TURNS -- WHAT?! NOT ONE TURN OR TWO TURNS -- ALL OF OUR TURNS.
NOT ONE TURN OR TWO TURNS -- ALL OF OUR TURNS.
WHOA! ALL OF OUR TURNS.
WHOA! WE NEVER AIRED IT? WHOA! WE NEVER AIRED IT? NO.
WE FORGOT TO PUT IT ON.
WE NEVER AIRED IT? NO.
WE FORGOT TO PUT IT ON.
I TOLD YOU TO REMIND US.
NO.
WE FORGOT TO PUT IT ON.
I TOLD YOU TO REMIND US.
YOU KNOW WHAT? YOU'RE RIGHT.
I TOLD YOU TO REMIND US.
YOU KNOW WHAT? YOU'RE RIGHT.
WE SHOULD REALLY GO THROUGH YOU KNOW WHAT? YOU'RE RIGHT.
WE SHOULD REALLY GO THROUGH THAT VAULT.
WE SHOULD REALLY GO THROUGH THAT VAULT.
I FEEL LIKE THERE'S A LOT OF THAT VAULT.
I FEEL LIKE THERE'S A LOT OF GOLD DOWN THERE.
I FEEL LIKE THERE'S A LOT OF GOLD DOWN THERE.
JUST EVERY TIME WE GO DOWN GOLD DOWN THERE.
JUST EVERY TIME WE GO DOWN THERE, WE JUST PARTY AND PARTY.
JUST EVERY TIME WE GO DOWN THERE, WE JUST PARTY AND PARTY.
OH, IT'S ALL PARTIES IN THE THERE, WE JUST PARTY AND PARTY.
OH, IT'S ALL PARTIES IN THE VAULT, NO WORK.
OH, IT'S ALL PARTIES IN THE VAULT, NO WORK.
WHERE IS THE VAULT?! VAULT, NO WORK.
WHERE IS THE VAULT?! IT'S DOWNSTAIRS.
WHERE IS THE VAULT?! IT'S DOWNSTAIRS.
SO, GUYS, HERE YOU GO -- A IT'S DOWNSTAIRS.
SO, GUYS, HERE YOU GO -- A CHALLENGE YOU'VE NEVER SEEN SO, GUYS, HERE YOU GO -- A CHALLENGE YOU'VE NEVER SEEN BEFORE STRAIGHT FROM THE CHALLENGE YOU'VE NEVER SEEN BEFORE STRAIGHT FROM THE "JOKERS" VAULT.
WE WANT TO KNOW YOUR OPINION, WHICH IS WHY WE'RE CONDUCTING A FOCUS GROUP! WE'RE CONDUCTING A WHY ARE YOU SO ANGRY? WHY ARE YOU SO ANGRY? I'M FOCUSED! I'M FOCUSED! ON WHAT, YOU ASK? WE HAVE NO IDEA BECAUSE THE ON WHAT, YOU ASK? WE HAVE NO IDEA BECAUSE THE QUESTIONS WE'RE ASKING HAVE BEEN WE HAVE NO IDEA BECAUSE THE QUESTIONS WE'RE ASKING HAVE BEEN WRITTEN BY THE OTHER GUYS.
QUESTIONS WE'RE ASKING HAVE BEEN WRITTEN BY THE OTHER GUYS.
IF YOU CANNOT ASK EVERY WRITTEN BY THE OTHER GUYS.
IF YOU CANNOT ASK EVERY SINGLE QUESTION, YOU LOSE! IF YOU CANNOT ASK EVERY SINGLE QUESTION, YOU LOSE! Both: FOCUS! HOW ARE YOU? HAVE A SEAT HERE.
SO, HAVE YOU EVER DONE A FOCUS HAVE A SEAT HERE.
SO, HAVE YOU EVER DONE A FOCUS GROUP BEFORE? SO, HAVE YOU EVER DONE A FOCUS GROUP BEFORE? BASICALLY, WE JUST GET YOUR GROUP BEFORE? BASICALLY, WE JUST GET YOUR OPINIONS AND THOUGHTS ON STUFF BASICALLY, WE JUST GET YOUR OPINIONS AND THOUGHTS ON STUFF AND ASK YOU A BUNCH OF OPINIONS AND THOUGHTS ON STUFF AND ASK YOU A BUNCH OF QUESTIONS.
AND ASK YOU A BUNCH OF QUESTIONS.
LET'S DO IT.
QUESTIONS.
LET'S DO IT.
SO, HOW MANY HOURS OF SLEEP DO LET'S DO IT.
SO, HOW MANY HOURS OF SLEEP DO YOU AVERAGE PER NIGHT? SO, HOW MANY HOURS OF SLEEP DO YOU AVERAGE PER NIGHT? ABOUT SEVEN OR EIGHT? YOU AVERAGE PER NIGHT? ABOUT SEVEN OR EIGHT? ALL RIGHT.
ABOUT SEVEN OR EIGHT? ALL RIGHT.
[ SIGHS .]
ALL RIGHT.
[ SIGHS .]
UM [ SIGHS .]
UM [ LAUGHTER .]
NO.
SNITCHES GET STITCHES.
I'LL CUT A BITCH.
SNITCHES GET STITCHES.
I'LL CUT A BITCH.
[ LAUGHTER .]
[ LAUGHTER .]
I'LL GO FIRST.
THERE WAS THIS TIME WHEN I WAS I'LL GO FIRST.
THERE WAS THIS TIME WHEN I WAS ON THE BUS AND I DIDN'T HOLD IT THERE WAS THIS TIME WHEN I WAS ON THE BUS AND I DIDN'T HOLD IT IN FOR A FIELD TRIP.
ON THE BUS AND I DIDN'T HOLD IT IN FOR A FIELD TRIP.
WE WERE GOING TO THE IN FOR A FIELD TRIP.
WE WERE GOING TO THE TURTLE BACK ZOO, AND I [BLEEP.]
WE WERE GOING TO THE TURTLE BACK ZOO, AND I [BLEEP.]
MY PANTS.
TURTLE BACK ZOO, AND I [BLEEP.]
MY PANTS.
YOU? MY PANTS.
YOU? UH [SIGHS.]
YOU? UH [SIGHS.]
[ LAUGHS .]
UH [SIGHS.]
[ LAUGHS .]
IF I LOST 20 POUNDS, WOULD [ LAUGHS .]
IF I LOST 20 POUNDS, WOULD YOU DREAM OF ME? IF I LOST 20 POUNDS, WOULD YOU DREAM OF ME? [ LAUGHS .]
YOU DREAM OF ME? [ LAUGHS .]
NO.
[ LAUGHS .]
NO.
NO.
NO.
NO.
[ LAUGHTER .]
[ LAUGHTER .]
"BE BLACK.
" [ Chuckling .]
OKAY.
"BE BLACK.
" [ Chuckling .]
OKAY.
GREAT.
GREAT.
GOOD LUCK WITH THAT ONE, PAL.
GOOD LUCK WITH THAT ONE, PAL.
[ LAUGHS .]
[ LAUGHS .]
[ SIGHS .]
[ LAUGHTER .]
[ SIGHS .]
[ LAUGHTER .]
GO FOR IT.
[ LAUGHTER .]
GO FOR IT.
I'VE NEVER BEEN KISSED.
GO FOR IT.
I'VE NEVER BEEN KISSED.
WOULD YOU DO ME THE HONORS? I'VE NEVER BEEN KISSED.
WOULD YOU DO ME THE HONORS? OH! [ CHEERING .]
CONGRATULATIONS, JOE! [ CHUCKLES .]
CONGRATULATIONS, JOE! [ CHUCKLES .]
[ DING! .]
[ CHUCKLES .]
[ DING! .]
HELLO.
[ DING! .]
HELLO.
HI.
I'M JAMES.
HOW ARE YOU? HELLO.
HI.
I'M JAMES.
HOW ARE YOU? HELLO, JAMES.
HI.
I'M JAMES.
HOW ARE YOU? HELLO, JAMES.
WHAT'S YOUR NAME? WHAT'S YOUR NAME? PETER.
PETER, NICE TO MEET YOU.
HAVE A SEAT.
HAVE A SEAT.
THIS GUY IS SUPER SERIOUS THIS GUY IS SUPER SERIOUS ABOUT HIS OPINIONS.
SHOWS UP IN A SUIT.
ABOUT HIS OPINIONS.
SHOWS UP IN A SUIT.
HE'S HERE TO PLAY.
SHOWS UP IN A SUIT.
HE'S HERE TO PLAY.
I'M GOING TO ASK YOU NOW A HE'S HERE TO PLAY.
I'M GOING TO ASK YOU NOW A SERIES OF QUESTIONS, OKAY? I'M GOING TO ASK YOU NOW A SERIES OF QUESTIONS, OKAY? ALL RIGHT.
SERIES OF QUESTIONS, OKAY? ALL RIGHT.
OKAY.
ALL RIGHT.
OKAY.
SO, I WANT YOU TO ANSWER OKAY.
SO, I WANT YOU TO ANSWER "ALWAYS," "SOMETIMES," OR SO, I WANT YOU TO ANSWER "ALWAYS," "SOMETIMES," OR "NEVER.
" "ALWAYS," "SOMETIMES," OR "NEVER.
" OKAY.
"NEVER.
" OKAY.
"I ENJOY A CUP OF COFFEE.
" OKAY.
"I ENJOY A CUP OF COFFEE.
" ALWAYS.
"I ENJOY A CUP OF COFFEE.
" ALWAYS.
AT NIGHT? ALWAYS.
AT NIGHT? NEVER.
AT NIGHT? NEVER.
"I TAKE LONG SHOWERS.
" NEVER.
"I TAKE LONG SHOWERS.
" ALWAYS.
"I TAKE LONG SHOWERS.
" ALWAYS.
WITH CLOSE RELATIVES? ALWAYS.
WITH CLOSE RELATIVES? [ LAUGHTER .]
WITH CLOSE RELATIVES? [ LAUGHTER .]
NEVER.
[ LAUGHTER .]
NEVER.
[ LAUGHTER .]
NEVER.
[ LAUGHTER .]
"I LIKE TO KISS.
" [ LAUGHTER .]
"I LIKE TO KISS.
" ALWAYS.
"I LIKE TO KISS.
" ALWAYS.
ASS? ALWAYS.
ASS? NEVER.
ASS? NEVER.
"I'VE BEEN TO A NEVER.
"I'VE BEEN TO A DRIVE-THROUGH.
" "I'VE BEEN TO A DRIVE-THROUGH.
" SOMETIMES.
DRIVE-THROUGH.
" SOMETIMES.
STRIP CLUB? SOMETIMES.
STRIP CLUB? [ LAUGHTER .]
STRIP CLUB? [ LAUGHTER .]
NEVER.
[ LAUGHTER .]
NEVER.
KEEP GOING.
NEVER.
KEEP GOING.
NEXT QUESTION IS KEEP GOING.
NEXT QUESTION IS "THEY SAY NEXT QUESTION IS "THEY SAY WHAT DO THEY SAY, MURR? "THEY SAY WHAT DO THEY SAY, MURR? WHAT DO THEY SAY? WHAT DO THEY SAY, MURR? WHAT DO THEY SAY? WHAT DO THEY SAY? WHAT DO THEY SAY? WHAT DO THEY SAY? THEY SAY THAT "ONE IN THE WHAT DO THEY SAY? THEY SAY THAT "ONE IN THE HAND IS WORTH TWO IN THE BUSH.
" THEY SAY THAT "ONE IN THE HAND IS WORTH TWO IN THE BUSH.
" HOW MANY HA-- HOW MANY HANDS DO HAND IS WORTH TWO IN THE BUSH.
" HOW MANY HA-- HOW MANY HANDS DO YOU PREFER IN YOUR BUSH? HOW MANY HA-- HOW MANY HANDS DO YOU PREFER IN YOUR BUSH? [ LAUGHTER .]
YOU PREFER IN YOUR BUSH? [ LAUGHTER .]
I HAVE A BUSH? [ LAUGHTER .]
I HAVE A BUSH? THAT'S WHAT SHE SAID.
I HAVE A BUSH? THAT'S WHAT SHE SAID.
[ LAUGHTER .]
THAT'S WHAT SHE SAID.
[ LAUGHTER .]
THIS GUY'S LETTING LOOSE NOW, [ LAUGHTER .]
THIS GUY'S LETTING LOOSE NOW, THAT'S IT.
THIS GUY'S LETTING LOOSE NOW, THAT'S IT.
[ CHUCKLES .]
THAT'S IT.
[ CHUCKLES .]
WHAT DO YOU HAVE TO SAY TO [ CHUCKLES .]
WHAT DO YOU HAVE TO SAY TO THAT PIECE OF POOP THAT JUST WHAT DO YOU HAVE TO SAY TO THAT PIECE OF POOP THAT JUST REFUSES TO FLUSH? THAT PIECE OF POOP THAT JUST REFUSES TO FLUSH? [ LAUGHTER .]
REFUSES TO FLUSH? [ LAUGHTER .]
OBJECTIVELY SPEAKING.
[ LAUGHTER .]
OBJECTIVELY SPEAKING.
OKAY, UM, I'M TRYING TO OBJECTIVELY SPEAKING.
OKAY, UM, I'M TRYING TO VISUALIZE.
OKAY, UM, I'M TRYING TO VISUALIZE.
[ LAUGHTER .]
VISUALIZE.
[ LAUGHTER .]
"SO, DO ME A FAVOR -- PRETEND [ LAUGHTER .]
"SO, DO ME A FAVOR -- PRETEND I'M A PIECE OF POOP.
" "SO, DO ME A FAVOR -- PRETEND I'M A PIECE OF POOP.
" SO, LET'S ROLE-PLAY.
I'M A PIECE OF POOP.
" SO, LET'S ROLE-PLAY.
OKAY.
SO, LET'S ROLE-PLAY.
OKAY.
LET'S SAY THAT I'M THAT PIECE OKAY.
LET'S SAY THAT I'M THAT PIECE OF POOP IN QUESTION.
LET'S SAY THAT I'M THAT PIECE OF POOP IN QUESTION.
AND FLUSH.
OF POOP IN QUESTION.
AND FLUSH.
FLUSH.
AND FLUSH.
FLUSH.
[ IMITATES FLUSHING .]
FLUSH.
[ IMITATES FLUSHING .]
[ LAUGHTER .]
[ DING! .]
HERE WE GO, BUDDY.
[ LAUGHTER .]
HERE WE GO, BUDDY.
[ LAUGHTER .]
POINT TO A PLACE ON MY BODY [ LAUGHTER .]
POINT TO A PLACE ON MY BODY THAT YOU THINK COULD BE POINT TO A PLACE ON MY BODY THAT YOU THINK COULD BE IMPROVED.
THAT YOU THINK COULD BE IMPROVED.
[ LAUGHTER .]
IMPROVED.
[ LAUGHTER .]
NO HESITATION! NO HESITATION! YOU'D CHANGE MY FACE? WHAT PART OF MY BODY COULD BE IMPROVED? IMPROVED? [ LAUGHTER .]
[ LAUGHTER .]
ALL RIGHT.
ALL RIGHT.
WELL, I'M JUST GONNA ASK YOU A FEW QUESTIONS, AND THERE'S NO WELL, I'M JUST GONNA ASK YOU A FEW QUESTIONS, AND THERE'S NO WRONG ANSWERS.
FEW QUESTIONS, AND THERE'S NO WRONG ANSWERS.
HERE HE GOES.
WRONG ANSWERS.
HERE HE GOES.
[ LAUGHTER .]
HERE HE GOES.
[ LAUGHTER .]
YOU ASKED FOR IT! [ LAUGHTER .]
YOU ASKED FOR IT! WHAT'S YOUR TECHNIQUE WHEN YOU ASKED FOR IT! WHAT'S YOUR TECHNIQUE WHEN YOU GO DOWNTOWN? OH, I MEANT, LIKE, TRAIN OR BUS OR [ LAUGHTER .]
OR [ LAUGHTER .]
[ Chuckling .]
I SEE.
[ LAUGHTER .]
[ Chuckling .]
I SEE.
YOU MEANT [ Chuckling .]
I SEE.
YOU MEANT OH! YOU MEANT OH! [ LAUGHTER .]
OH! [ LAUGHTER .]
ROOTY-TOOT-TOOT, YOU KNOW? [ LAUGHTER .]
ROOTY-TOOT-TOOT, YOU KNOW? DROPPED A ROOTY-TOOT-TOOT! DROPPED A ROOTY-TOOT-TOOT! [ DING! .]
SO, WE JUST ASK A SERIES OF QUESTIONS KIND OF TO TRACK QUESTIONS KIND OF TO TRACK PEOPLE'S PERSONAL HABITS.
PEOPLE'S PERSONAL HABITS.
OKAY, JAMES.
COOL.
DELIVER IT.
JUST READ IT.
JUST READ IT.
JUST READ IT.
JUST READ IT.
DO YOU THINK I SHOULD FINALLY JUST READ IT.
DO YOU THINK I SHOULD FINALLY GIVE UP ON THIS GAME OF HIDE AND DO YOU THINK I SHOULD FINALLY GIVE UP ON THIS GAME OF HIDE AND SEEK? GIVE UP ON THIS GAME OF HIDE AND SEEK? UH SEEK? UH NOW, SAL, YELL, "I GIVE UP.
" UH NOW, SAL, YELL, "I GIVE UP.
" I GIVE UP! [ CHUCKLES .]
[ CHUCKLES .]
[ DOOR OPENS .]
[ CHUCKLES .]
[ DOOR OPENS .]
OH, MY GOD! [ DOOR OPENS .]
OH, MY GOD! [ LAUGHTER .]
AND WE JUST ASK A SERIES OF QUESTIONS.
OKAY, JAMES.
COOL.
DELIVER IT.
JUST READ IT.
DO YOU THINK I SHOULD FINALLY JUST READ IT.
DO YOU THINK I SHOULD FINALLY GIVE UP ON THIS GAME OF HIDE AND DO YOU THINK I SHOULD FINALLY GIVE UP ON THIS GAME OF HIDE AND SEEK? GIVE UP ON THIS GAME OF HIDE AND SEEK? NOW, SAL, YELL, "I GIVE UP.
" SEEK? NOW, SAL, YELL, "I GIVE UP.
" I GIVE UP! NOW, SAL, YELL, "I GIVE UP.
" I GIVE UP! [ CHUCKLES .]
I GIVE UP! [ CHUCKLES .]
[ CHUCKLES .]
[ CHUCKLES .]
[ CHUCKLES .]
OH, MY GOD! [ CHUCKLES .]
OH, MY GOD! [ LAUGHTER .]
OH, MY GOD! [ LAUGHTER .]
[ DRAMATIC MUSIC PLAYS .]
[ LAUGHTER .]
[ DRAMATIC MUSIC PLAYS .]
I WIN! [ DRAMATIC MUSIC PLAYS .]
I WIN! [ LAUGHTER .]
YOU KNOW, SHE WINS.
[ LAUGHTER .]
[ DING! .]
[ LAUGHTER .]
[ DING! .]
I STILL DON'T UNDERSTAND HOW [ DING! .]
I STILL DON'T UNDERSTAND HOW THAT HAPPENED.
I STILL DON'T UNDERSTAND HOW THAT HAPPENED.
YOU PUT A CHILD IN A CLOSET.
THAT HAPPENED.
YOU PUT A CHILD IN A CLOSET.
I WAS IN THAT ROOM FOR LIKE 40 YOU PUT A CHILD IN A CLOSET.
I WAS IN THAT ROOM FOR LIKE 40 MINUTES.
I WAS IN THAT ROOM FOR LIKE 40 MINUTES.
[ LAUGHTER .]
MINUTES.
[ LAUGHTER .]
WE JUST PUT HER IN THE CORNER [ LAUGHTER .]
WE JUST PUT HER IN THE CORNER WITH, LIKE, AN ICE POP.
WE JUST PUT HER IN THE CORNER WITH, LIKE, AN ICE POP.
WE'RE LIKE, "Shh, HONEY.
" WITH, LIKE, AN ICE POP.
WE'RE LIKE, "Shh, HONEY.
" I TOOK THAT WOMAN'S ADVICE.
WE'RE LIKE, "Shh, HONEY.
" I TOOK THAT WOMAN'S ADVICE.
I GREW THE BEARD TO WORK ON THIS I TOOK THAT WOMAN'S ADVICE.
I GREW THE BEARD TO WORK ON THIS FACE.
I GREW THE BEARD TO WORK ON THIS FACE.
YOU FIXED IT.
FACE.
YOU FIXED IT.
THAT WAS HURTFUL.
YOU FIXED IT.
THAT WAS HURTFUL.
WELL, I MEAN, I DON'T WANT TO THAT WAS HURTFUL.
WELL, I MEAN, I DON'T WANT TO SAY ANYTHING, BUT I'VE BEEN WELL, I MEAN, I DON'T WANT TO SAY ANYTHING, BUT I'VE BEEN KISSED TWICE SINCE THEN.
SAY ANYTHING, BUT I'VE BEEN KISSED TWICE SINCE THEN.
WOW! KISSED TWICE SINCE THEN.
WOW! TWICE.
WOW! TWICE.
ALL RIGHT.
TWICE.
ALL RIGHT.
BOTH TIMES IN THE VAULT, ALL RIGHT.
BOTH TIMES IN THE VAULT, RIGHT? BOTH TIMES IN THE VAULT, RIGHT? YEAH! I LOVE THAT VAULT! RIGHT? YEAH! I LOVE THAT VAULT! ANOTHER REALLY COOL THING YEAH! I LOVE THAT VAULT! ANOTHER REALLY COOL THING THAT HAPPENED DURING THIS FOCUS ANOTHER REALLY COOL THING THAT HAPPENED DURING THIS FOCUS GROUP IS SOMETHING WE GET ASKED THAT HAPPENED DURING THIS FOCUS GROUP IS SOMETHING WE GET ASKED A LOT, WHICH IS, "WHAT HAPPENS GROUP IS SOMETHING WE GET ASKED A LOT, WHICH IS, "WHAT HAPPENS WHEN PEOPLE FIND OUT THEY'RE ON A LOT, WHICH IS, "WHAT HAPPENS WHEN PEOPLE FIND OUT THEY'RE ON 'IMPRACTICAL JOKERS'?" WHEN PEOPLE FIND OUT THEY'RE ON 'IMPRACTICAL JOKERS'?" WE HAVE ONE OF THOSE MOMENTS 'IMPRACTICAL JOKERS'?" WE HAVE ONE OF THOSE MOMENTS RIGHT NOW.
WE HAVE ONE OF THOSE MOMENTS RIGHT NOW.
LET'S TAKE A LOOK.
RIGHT NOW.
LET'S TAKE A LOOK.
YEP.
LET'S TAKE A LOOK.
YEP.
OKAY.
YEP.
OKAY.
HAVE YOU EVER PLAYED ORGANIZED OKAY.
HAVE YOU EVER PLAYED ORGANIZED SPORTS? HAVE YOU EVER PLAYED ORGANIZED SPORTS? YES.
SPORTS? YES.
YES.
RIGHT.
WHAT KIND? YES.
YES.
RIGHT.
WHAT KIND? BASKETBALL, FOOTBALL, YES.
RIGHT.
WHAT KIND? BASKETBALL, FOOTBALL, BASEBALL.
BASKETBALL, FOOTBALL, BASEBALL.
THIS GUY'S REALLY LOW-KEY.
BASEBALL.
THIS GUY'S REALLY LOW-KEY.
HE IS.
THIS GUY'S REALLY LOW-KEY.
HE IS.
WE GOT TO GO BIG ON THIS GUY.
HE IS.
WE GOT TO GO BIG ON THIS GUY.
NEXT QUESTION.
WE GOT TO GO BIG ON THIS GUY.
NEXT QUESTION.
GOOD LUCK.
[ LAUGHTER .]
THESE QUESTIONS ARE GETTING ME.
[ LAUGHTER .]
YOU EVER WATCH [ LAUGHTER .]
YOU EVER WATCH "IMPRACTICAL JOKERS"? YOU EVER WATCH "IMPRACTICAL JOKERS"? WHAT'S THAT? "IMPRACTICAL JOKERS"? WHAT'S THAT? "IMPRACTICAL JOKERS.
" WHAT'S THAT? "IMPRACTICAL JOKERS.
" OH, HE KNOWS US! "IMPRACTICAL JOKERS.
" OH, HE KNOWS US! AT NIGHT, IT'S A CABLE SHOW OH, HE KNOWS US! AT NIGHT, IT'S A CABLE SHOW ABOUT THESE FOUR GUYS WHO AT NIGHT, IT'S A CABLE SHOW ABOUT THESE FOUR GUYS WHO CHALLENGE EACH OTHER TO SAY AND ABOUT THESE FOUR GUYS WHO CHALLENGE EACH OTHER TO SAY AND DO THE MOST CRAZIEST THINGS.
CHALLENGE EACH OTHER TO SAY AND DO THE MOST CRAZIEST THINGS.
REALLY? DO THE MOST CRAZIEST THINGS.
REALLY? IT IS RIDICULOUS.
REALLY? IT IS RIDICULOUS.
REALLY? IT IS RIDICULOUS.
REALLY? HE DOESN'T KNOW IT'S HIM.
REALLY? HE DOESN'T KNOW IT'S HIM.
ONE TIME, THEY WERE IN A BED HE DOESN'T KNOW IT'S HIM.
ONE TIME, THEY WERE IN A BED STORE WHERE THEY SELL BEDS, AND ONE TIME, THEY WERE IN A BED STORE WHERE THEY SELL BEDS, AND THE GUY WAS PRETENDING LIKE HE STORE WHERE THEY SELL BEDS, AND THE GUY WAS PRETENDING LIKE HE WAS THE SALESMAN.
THE GUY WAS PRETENDING LIKE HE WAS THE SALESMAN.
SO, GUY GOT ON THE BED, SO HE WAS THE SALESMAN.
SO, GUY GOT ON THE BED, SO HE GETS ON THE BED AND WAS LIKE, SO, GUY GOT ON THE BED, SO HE GETS ON THE BED AND WAS LIKE, "GET ON THE BED WITH HIM.
" GETS ON THE BED AND WAS LIKE, "GET ON THE BED WITH HIM.
" THIS IS IKEA.
"GET ON THE BED WITH HIM.
" THIS IS IKEA.
THIS IS SAL'S BIT IN IKEA.
THIS IS IKEA.
THIS IS SAL'S BIT IN IKEA.
GOT ON THE BED WITH HIM, AND THIS IS SAL'S BIT IN IKEA.
GOT ON THE BED WITH HIM, AND THEN HE SAYS, "OKAY, NOW SPOON GOT ON THE BED WITH HIM, AND THEN HE SAYS, "OKAY, NOW SPOON HIM.
" THEN HE SAYS, "OKAY, NOW SPOON HIM.
" "SPOON THE GUY"? HIM.
" "SPOON THE GUY"? GET OUT OF HERE.
"SPOON THE GUY"? GET OUT OF HERE.
DID HE DO IT? GET OUT OF HERE.
DID HE DO IT? DID THE GUY SPOON HIM? DID HE DO IT? DID THE GUY SPOON HIM? YEAH, HE DID.
DID THE GUY SPOON HIM? YEAH, HE DID.
OH, HE SOUNDS LIKE THE BEST YEAH, HE DID.
OH, HE SOUNDS LIKE THE BEST ONE ON THE SHOW.
OH, HE SOUNDS LIKE THE BEST ONE ON THE SHOW.
[ LAUGHS .]
ONE ON THE SHOW.
[ LAUGHS .]
THEY GOT BALLS -- ALL OF [ LAUGHS .]
THEY GOT BALLS -- ALL OF THEM.
THEY GOT BALLS -- ALL OF THEM.
THEY ALL OF THEM GOT HUGE BALLS.
THEM.
THEY ALL OF THEM GOT HUGE BALLS.
THAT'S COOL, THAT'S COOL.
THAT'S COOL, THAT'S COOL.
YEAH.
YOU SHOULD WATCH IT.
THAT'S GREAT.
ALL RIGHT.
T.
WELL, BOB, THAT WAS ACTUALLY -- WELL, BOB, THAT WAS ACTUALLY -- YOU DID GREAT, AND ACTUALLY THE YOU DID GREAT, AND ACTUALLY THE CLIENT'S GONNA COME IN JUST TO SAY HELLO.
CLIENT'S GONNA COME IN JUST TO SAY HELLO.
LET'S SEE.
SAY HELLO.
LET'S SEE.
HELLO, THERE.
LET'S SEE.
HELLO, THERE.
YOU LIKE THAT SHOW HELLO, THERE.
YOU LIKE THAT SHOW "IMPRACTICAL JOKERS", HUH? YOU LIKE THAT SHOW "IMPRACTICAL JOKERS", HUH? I KNEW HE WAS "IMPRACTICAL JOKERS", HUH? I KNEW HE WAS [ LAUGHTER .]
I KNEW HE WAS [ LAUGHTER .]
I WAS SAYING, "WAIT A MINUTE.
" [ LAUGHTER .]
I WAS SAYING, "WAIT A MINUTE.
" LIKE, WAIT A MINUTE.
I'M SAYING, YOU CATS GOT BALLS, MAN.
[ LAUGHTER .]
MAN.
[ LAUGHTER .]
WE WERE CRYING BACK THERE [ LAUGHTER .]
WE WERE CRYING BACK THERE LISTENING TO YOU DESCRIBE OUR WE WERE CRYING BACK THERE LISTENING TO YOU DESCRIBE OUR SHOW.
LISTENING TO YOU DESCRIBE OUR SHOW.
I'M GONNA BE HONEST WITH YOU, SHOW.
I'M GONNA BE HONEST WITH YOU, MAN.
I'M GONNA BE HONEST WITH YOU, MAN.
THERE'S NOT MANY TV SHOWS I MAN.
THERE'S NOT MANY TV SHOWS I WATCH, BUT YOURS IS A GREAT THERE'S NOT MANY TV SHOWS I WATCH, BUT YOURS IS A GREAT [BLEEP.]
SHOW.
WATCH, BUT YOURS IS A GREAT [BLEEP.]
SHOW.
THANK YOU.
[BLEEP.]
SHOW.
THANK YOU.
WE APPRECIATE IT.
THANK YOU.
WE APPRECIATE IT.
DUDE, THAT MEANS A LOT.
WE APPRECIATE IT.
DUDE, THAT MEANS A LOT.
WELL, WE'RE GLAD YOU COULD BE DUDE, THAT MEANS A LOT.
WELL, WE'RE GLAD YOU COULD BE PART OF IT.
WELL, WE'RE GLAD YOU COULD BE PART OF IT.
THANK YOU SO MUCH.
PART OF IT.
THANK YOU SO MUCH.
OH, MAN.
THANK YOU SO MUCH.
OH, MAN.
HOW DID THAT GUY NOT KNOW IT OH, MAN.
HOW DID THAT GUY NOT KNOW IT WAS YOU HE WAS TALKING TO? HOW DID THAT GUY NOT KNOW IT WAS YOU HE WAS TALKING TO? HOW HAVE I NOT BEEN INVITED WAS YOU HE WAS TALKING TO? HOW HAVE I NOT BEEN INVITED TO THE VAULT? EVEN IF YOU KNEW WHERE THE VAULT WAS, YOU DON'T KNOW THE CODE TO GET IN.
VAULT WAS, YOU DON'T KNOW THE CODE TO GET IN.
ALL RIGHT.
FAIR ENOUGH.
ALL RIGHT.
FAIR ENOUGH.
DON'T EVEN WORRY.
THANKS FOR TUNING IN TO "IMPRACTICAL JOKERS.
" "IMPRACTICAL JOKERS.
" WE'LL SEE YOU SOON! WE'LL SEE YOU SOON! GUYS, LET'S HEAD DOWN TO THE GUYS, LET'S HEAD DOWN TO THE VAULT, SHALL WE? VAULT, SHALL WE? YEAH, ALL RIGHT! YEAH, ALL RIGHT! I GET TO GO TO THE VAULT! [ BUZZES .]
I GET TO GO TO THE VAULT! [ BUZZES .]
[ BUZZES .]
[ BUZZES .]
[ BUZZES .]
THAT'S SILLY.
[ BUZZES .]
THAT'S SILLY.
THAT'S JUST SILLY.
THAT'S SILLY.
THAT'S JUST SILLY.
I'M NOT EVEN GONNA PLAY ALONG.
THAT'S JUST SILLY.
I'M NOT EVEN GONNA PLAY ALONG.
AND THAT'S WHY YOU NEVER GET I'M NOT EVEN GONNA PLAY ALONG.
AND THAT'S WHY YOU NEVER GET TO THE VAULT.
AND THAT'S WHY YOU NEVER GET TO THE VAULT.
THAT'S WHY YOU NEVER SEE IT.
TO THE VAULT.
THAT'S WHY YOU NEVER SEE IT.
THAT'S RIGHT.
THAT'S WHY YOU NEVER SEE IT.
THAT'S RIGHT.
[ LAUGHTER .]
THAT'S RIGHT.
[ LAUGHTER .]
[ CHUCKLES .]
[ LAUGHTER .]
[ CHUCKLES .]
THEY'RE UNDER THE TABLE.
[ CHUCKLES .]
THEY'RE UNDER THE TABLE.
[ LAUGHS .]
YES, WE ARE! THAT'S RIGHT.
WE WENT DOWN TO THE "JOKERS" THAT'S RIGHT.
WE WENT DOWN TO THE "JOKERS" VAULT AND PULLED OUT SOME WE WENT DOWN TO THE "JOKERS" VAULT AND PULLED OUT SOME NEVER-BEFORE-SEEN CHALLENGES.
VAULT AND PULLED OUT SOME NEVER-BEFORE-SEEN CHALLENGES.
WHAT IS "JOKERS" VAULT? NEVER-BEFORE-SEEN CHALLENGES.
WHAT IS "JOKERS" VAULT? IT'S THE PLACE DOWNSTAIRS WHAT IS "JOKERS" VAULT? IT'S THE PLACE DOWNSTAIRS WHERE WE KEEP ALL THE STUFF IT'S THE PLACE DOWNSTAIRS WHERE WE KEEP ALL THE STUFF THEY'VE NEVER SEEN.
WHERE WE KEEP ALL THE STUFF THEY'VE NEVER SEEN.
THE VAULT, BUDDY.
THEY'VE NEVER SEEN.
THE VAULT, BUDDY.
YOU GUYS HAVE ALL BEEN TO A THE VAULT, BUDDY.
YOU GUYS HAVE ALL BEEN TO A "JOKERS" VAULT? YOU GUYS HAVE ALL BEEN TO A "JOKERS" VAULT? YOU'VE NEVER BEEN TO THE "JOKERS" VAULT? YOU'VE NEVER BEEN TO THE VAULT? YOU'VE NEVER BEEN TO THE VAULT? WE'RE HAVING A CRAZY PARTY VAULT? WE'RE HAVING A CRAZY PARTY THERE NEXT WEEKEND.
WE'RE HAVING A CRAZY PARTY THERE NEXT WEEKEND.
YEAH, MAN.
I CAN'T WAIT! THERE NEXT WEEKEND.
YEAH, MAN.
I CAN'T WAIT! YOU'RE HAVING A VAULT PARTY? YEAH, MAN.
I CAN'T WAIT! YOU'RE HAVING A VAULT PARTY? VAULT PARTIES! YOU'RE HAVING A VAULT PARTY? VAULT PARTIES! AM I INVITED?! VAULT PARTIES! AM I INVITED?! ANYWAY, STICK AROUND TOWARDS AM I INVITED?! ANYWAY, STICK AROUND TOWARDS THE END OF THE EPISODE, WHERE ANYWAY, STICK AROUND TOWARDS THE END OF THE EPISODE, WHERE WE'LL SHOW YOU WHAT HAPPENS WHEN THE END OF THE EPISODE, WHERE WE'LL SHOW YOU WHAT HAPPENS WHEN ONE MAN FINDS OUT THAT HE IS ON WE'LL SHOW YOU WHAT HAPPENS WHEN ONE MAN FINDS OUT THAT HE IS ON "IMPRACTICAL JOKERS.
" ONE MAN FINDS OUT THAT HE IS ON "IMPRACTICAL JOKERS.
" AND WE'LL SEE YOU AT THE "IMPRACTICAL JOKERS.
" AND WE'LL SEE YOU AT THE VAULT PARTY.
AND WE'LL SEE YOU AT THE VAULT PARTY.
I'LL BE THERE.
VAULT PARTY.
I'LL BE THERE.
UH I'LL BE THERE.
UH I'LL BE THERE.
UH I'LL BE THERE.
[ CHUCKLES .]
I'LL BE THERE.
[ CHUCKLES .]
PREPARE FOR SOMETHING [ CHUCKLES .]
PREPARE FOR SOMETHING AMAZING.
PREPARE FOR SOMETHING AMAZING.
HEY, MUSTACHE, WHAT'S UP? AMAZING.
HEY, MUSTACHE, WHAT'S UP? [ LAUGHTER .]
HEY, MUSTACHE, WHAT'S UP? [ LAUGHTER .]
I WANT MY MOMMY! [ LAUGHTER .]
I WANT MY MOMMY! [ LAUGHTER .]
I WANT MY MOMMY! [ LAUGHTER .]
I WILL NEVER FORGIVE YOU! [ LAUGHTER .]
I WILL NEVER FORGIVE YOU! LARRY! I WILL NEVER FORGIVE YOU! LARRY! [ LAUGHTER .]
OH, HEY, FELLAS.
YEAH.
DO YOU REMEMBER WHEN WE YEAH.
DO YOU REMEMBER WHEN WE WORKED AT THE PIZZERIA? DO YOU REMEMBER WHEN WE WORKED AT THE PIZZERIA? OH, OF COURSE.
ONE SLICE? Q, GET AWKWARDLY CLOSE TO THIS GUY AND JUST STARE INTO Q, GET AWKWARDLY CLOSE TO THIS GUY AND JUST STARE INTO HIS EYES.
TO THIS GUY AND JUST STARE INTO HIS EYES.
[ LAUGHTER .]
HIS EYES.
[ LAUGHTER .]
[ Laughing .]
KEEP STARING.
[ LAUGHTER .]
[ Laughing .]
KEEP STARING.
THIS GUY'S LOOKING BACK INTO [ Laughing .]
KEEP STARING.
THIS GUY'S LOOKING BACK INTO Q's SOUL.
THIS GUY'S LOOKING BACK INTO Q's SOUL.
YEAH, HE'S NOT GONNA LIKE Q's SOUL.
YEAH, HE'S NOT GONNA LIKE WHAT HE SEES.
YEAH, HE'S NOT GONNA LIKE WHAT HE SEES.
[ LAUGHTER .]
WHAT HE SEES.
[ LAUGHTER .]
YOU KNOW WHAT I'D LOVE TO YOU KNOW WHAT I'D LOVE TO SEE? SAL AND JOE'S UNAIRED TURNS FROM SEE? SAL AND JOE'S UNAIRED TURNS FROM THAT CHALLENGE.
SAL AND JOE'S UNAIRED TURNS FROM THAT CHALLENGE.
OH, I'D LOVE TO SEE THAT, THAT CHALLENGE.
OH, I'D LOVE TO SEE THAT, TOO.
OH, I'D LOVE TO SEE THAT, TOO.
LET'S SEE IT.
SAL, YOU WORKED IN A PIZZERIA FOR FOUR YEARS? FOR FOUR YEARS? [ CHUCKLES .]
YEAH.
DOES THAT GIVE YOU AN ADVANTAGE TODAY? ADVANTAGE TODAY? NO.
NO.
YOU KNOW THE LINGO, THE WAY THINGS ARE DONE.
YOU KNOW THE LINGO, THE WAY THINGS ARE DONE.
OH, YOU MEAN LIKE "PIZZA" AND THINGS ARE DONE.
OH, YOU MEAN LIKE "PIZZA" AND "SODA"? OH, YOU MEAN LIKE "PIZZA" AND "SODA"? [ LAUGHTER .]
"SODA"? [ LAUGHTER .]
HOW YOU DOING, BUD? [ LAUGHTER .]
HOW YOU DOING, BUD? SURE.
THE CORNERS? HOW YOU DOING, BUD? SURE.
THE CORNERS? YEAH.
SURE.
THE CORNERS? YEAH.
ALL RIGHT, SAL, JUST SLAP YEAH.
ALL RIGHT, SAL, JUST SLAP EVERYTHING THAT YOU SERVE THIS ALL RIGHT, SAL, JUST SLAP EVERYTHING THAT YOU SERVE THIS GUY.
EVERYTHING THAT YOU SERVE THIS GUY.
[ Chuckling .]
SLAP IT? GUY.
[ Chuckling .]
SLAP IT? JUST SLAP IT WITH YOUR HAND.
[ Chuckling .]
SLAP IT? JUST SLAP IT WITH YOUR HAND.
[ CHUCKLES .]
[ CHUCKLES .]
[ LAUGHS .]
SO, YOU GOT THESE TWO, AND YOU GOT THAT ONE.
YOU GOT THAT ONE.
ONE, TWO, THREE.
ONE, TWO, THREE.
[ LAUGHTER .]
[ LAUGHTER .]
HUH? HUH? THIS ONE'S NOT YOURS? THIS ONE'S NOT YOURS? NO, NO, I DON'T WANT THEM NO, NO, I DON'T WANT THEM 'CAUSE YOU PUT YOUR HANDS ON 'CAUSE YOU PUT YOUR HANDS ON THEM.
THEM.
OH, I'M SORRY.
IT'S A HABIT.
OH, I'M SORRY.
IT'S A HABIT.
OKAY.
OKAY.
THE FIRST ONE'S FINE, THOUGH? THE FIRST ONE'S FINE, THOUGH? [ LAUGHTER .]
SAL, GET YOUR FINGER IN [ LAUGHTER .]
SAL, GET YOUR FINGER IN HIS WATER.
SAL, GET YOUR FINGER IN HIS WATER.
AND THEN, YOU GOT THAT, AND HIS WATER.
AND THEN, YOU GOT THAT, AND THEN YOU GOT THE WATER HERE, AND THEN, YOU GOT THAT, AND THEN YOU GOT THE WATER HERE, RIGHT.
THEN YOU GOT THE WATER HERE, RIGHT.
[ LAUGHTER .]
RIGHT.
[ LAUGHTER .]
THAT'S YOURS.
HEY, HOW ARE YOU? SAL, EVERYTHING THEY SAY, SAY SAL, EVERYTHING THEY SAY, SAY "AGAIN WITH THIS [BLEEP.]
" [ LAUGHTER .]
"AGAIN WITH THIS [BLEEP.]
" [ LAUGHTER .]
LET ME GET TWO SLICES.
[ LAUGHTER .]
LET ME GET TWO SLICES.
YEAH, ONE OF THESE.
LET ME GET TWO SLICES.
YEAH, ONE OF THESE.
[ SIGHS .]
AGAIN WITH THIS YEAH, ONE OF THESE.
[ SIGHS .]
AGAIN WITH THIS [BLEEP.]
[ SIGHS .]
AGAIN WITH THIS [BLEEP.]
[ LAUGHTER .]
[ SIGHS .]
AGAIN WITH THIS [BLEEP.]
[ LAUGHTER .]
[BLEEP.]
[ LAUGHTER .]
TO GO OR TO STAY? [ LAUGHTER .]
TO GO OR TO STAY? STAY.
TO GO OR TO STAY? STAY.
DO IT AGAIN.
STAY.
DO IT AGAIN.
[ LAUGHS .]
DO IT AGAIN.
[ LAUGHS .]
[ GROANS .]
[ LAUGHS .]
[ GROANS .]
AND YOU WANT TO HEAT ONE OF [ GROANS .]
AND YOU WANT TO HEAT ONE OF THESE UP FOR HERE, RIGHT? AND YOU WANT TO HEAT ONE OF THESE UP FOR HERE, RIGHT? AGAIN WITH THIS [BLEEP.]
[ LAUGHTER .]
HOW YOU DOING, BUD? THIS ONE? HOW YOU DOING, BUD? THIS ONE? YEAH.
THIS ONE? YEAH.
SAL, GRAB HIS HAND, AND SCOOP YEAH.
SAL, GRAB HIS HAND, AND SCOOP IT RIGHT INTO HIS HAND.
SAL, GRAB HIS HAND, AND SCOOP IT RIGHT INTO HIS HAND.
DON'T USE THE CUP AT ALL.
IT RIGHT INTO HIS HAND.
DON'T USE THE CUP AT ALL.
[ LAUGHTER .]
DON'T USE THE CUP AT ALL.
[ LAUGHTER .]
UH, IT'S JUST TWO BUCKS.
UH, IT'S JUST TWO BUCKS.
OH, LET ME SEE.
DO YOU WANT TWO SCOOPS OR ONE? TWO SCOOPS? MEDIUM? TWO SCOOPS? MEDIUM? [ LAUGHTER .]
[ LAUGHTER .]
TWO.
TWO.
[ LAUGHTER .]
HE STAYED THERE FOR THE SECOND SCOOP.
YEAH.
SECOND SCOOP.
YEAH.
LIKE, AT ONE, YOU'D BE LIKE, YEAH.
LIKE, AT ONE, YOU'D BE LIKE, "DUDE.
" LIKE, AT ONE, YOU'D BE LIKE, "DUDE.
" AS LONG AS YOU DO SOMETHING "DUDE.
" AS LONG AS YOU DO SOMETHING WITH CONFIDENCE AS LONG AS YOU DO SOMETHING WITH CONFIDENCE YEAH.
WITH CONFIDENCE YEAH.
THEY'RE LIKE, "AM I THE YEAH.
THEY'RE LIKE, "AM I THE CRAZY ONE?" THEY'RE LIKE, "AM I THE CRAZY ONE?" I'LL TELL YOU WHAT I NOTICED CRAZY ONE?" I'LL TELL YOU WHAT I NOTICED FROM THAT CLIP IS THE WAY YOU I'LL TELL YOU WHAT I NOTICED FROM THAT CLIP IS THE WAY YOU AND I SAY "WATER" IS HORRIBLE.
FROM THAT CLIP IS THE WAY YOU AND I SAY "WATER" IS HORRIBLE.
"WATA.
" AND I SAY "WATER" IS HORRIBLE.
"WATA.
" "WATA.
OH, YOU WANT SOME "WATA.
" "WATA.
OH, YOU WANT SOME WATA? "WATA.
OH, YOU WANT SOME WATA? PUT YOUR FINGER IN THAT WATA.
" WATA? PUT YOUR FINGER IN THAT WATA.
" HOW DO YOU SPELL "WATER"? PUT YOUR FINGER IN THAT WATA.
" HOW DO YOU SPELL "WATER"? W-A-T-A.
HOW DO YOU SPELL "WATER"? W-A-T-A.
[ LAUGHTER .]
W-A-T-A.
[ LAUGHTER .]
IT'S WEIRD.
[ LAUGHTER .]
IT'S WEIRD.
WHEN I'M NOT AROUND YOU, I HAVE IT'S WEIRD.
WHEN I'M NOT AROUND YOU, I HAVE WHEN I'M NOT AROUND YOU, I HAVE IT'S VERY BIZARRE.
IT'S VERY BIZARRE.
SAL, TURN AWAY FOR A SECOND.
IT'S VERY BIZARRE.
SAL, TURN AWAY FOR A SECOND.
[ British accent .]
WELL, SAL, TURN AWAY FOR A SECOND.
[ British accent .]
WELL, HELLO.
[ British accent .]
WELL, HELLO.
JOLLY GOOD.
HELLO.
JOLLY GOOD.
[ Jersey accent .]
EH, WHAT'S JOLLY GOOD.
[ Jersey accent .]
EH, WHAT'S GOING ON AROUND HERE? [ Jersey accent .]
EH, WHAT'S GOING ON AROUND HERE? [ LAUGHS .]
GOING ON AROUND HERE? [ LAUGHS .]
OKAY, WE SAW MINE.
[ LAUGHS .]
OKAY, WE SAW MINE.
WHY DON'T WE WATCH JOE'S? OKAY, WE SAW MINE.
WHY DON'T WE WATCH JOE'S? MM-HMM.
WHY DON'T WE WATCH JOE'S? MM-HMM.
WHAT KIND OF WEIRD MM-HMM.
WHAT KIND OF WEIRD PIZZA-MAKING IS THAT? WHAT KIND OF WEIRD PIZZA-MAKING IS THAT? [ LAUGHTER .]
HI.
CAN I HELP YOU? COULD I JUST HAVE A REGULAR SLICE? COULD I JUST HAVE A REGULAR SLICE? ONE REGULAR SLICE? SLICE? ONE REGULAR SLICE? DOM, ONE REGULAR SLICE.
ONE REGULAR SLICE? DOM, ONE REGULAR SLICE.
JOE, HIT THE DOUGH AND YELL DOM, ONE REGULAR SLICE.
JOE, HIT THE DOUGH AND YELL OUT ETHNICITIES.
JOE, HIT THE DOUGH AND YELL OUT ETHNICITIES.
[ SIGHS .]
OUT ETHNICITIES.
[ SIGHS .]
ETHIOPIANS.
[ SIGHS .]
ETHIOPIANS.
[ LAUGHTER .]
[ LAUGHTER .]
MEXICANS.
OH, NO, IT'S JUST A LITTLE BIT OF EVERYBODY.
BIT OF EVERYBODY.
EVERYBODY TODAY'S BUSTING MY EVERYBODY TODAY'S BUSTING MY HUMP.
HUMP.
FILIPINOS.
FILIPINOS.
[ LAUGHTER .]
DO YOU WANT GARLIC KNOTS? [ LAUGHTER .]
DO YOU WANT GARLIC KNOTS? UKRAINIANS.
DO YOU WANT GARLIC KNOTS? UKRAINIANS.
[ LAUGHTER .]
CHE SI DICE, MY MAN? WHAT'S UP? CAN I HAVE A VANILLA CHIP? JOE, NOSE THE ICE.
CAN I HAVE A VANILLA CHIP? JOE, NOSE THE ICE.
[ LAUGHTER .]
JOE, NOSE THE ICE.
[ LAUGHTER .]
WHAT'S THE OTHER FLAVOR? [ LAUGHTER .]
WHAT'S THE OTHER FLAVOR? RAINBOW.
WHAT'S THE OTHER FLAVOR? RAINBOW.
RAINBOW.
RAINBOW.
RAINBOW.
[ DING! .]
RAINBOW.
[ DING! .]
[ LAUGHS .]
[ DING! .]
[ LAUGHS .]
[ CHUCKLES .]
REALLY DEEP.
[ LAUGHS .]
[ CHUCKLES .]
REALLY DEEP.
[ LAUGHS .]
[ CHUCKLES .]
REALLY DEEP.
[ LAUGHS .]
HE'S LOOKING AT HIM.
[ LAUGHS .]
HE'S LOOKING AT HIM.
[ DING! .]
HE'S LOOKING AT HIM.
[ DING! .]
[ LAUGHTER .]
[ DING! .]
[ LAUGHTER .]
[ DING! .]
[ LAUGHTER .]
[ DING! .]
[ LAUGHTER .]
[ DING! .]
[ LAUGHTER .]
SALUTE.
[ LAUGHTER .]
SALUTE.
[ LAUGHTER .]
HI.
CAN I HELP YOU? WHAT DO YOU NEED? JOE, KEEP LOOKING OUT THE JOE, KEEP LOOKING OUT THE WINDOW LIKE GODZILLA'S COMING.
ONE SLICE OF PIZZA? WINDOW LIKE GODZILLA'S COMING.
ONE SLICE OF PIZZA? [ Laughing .]
IS THAT GODZILLA ONE SLICE OF PIZZA? [ Laughing .]
IS THAT GODZILLA OUTSIDE? [ Laughing .]
IS THAT GODZILLA OUTSIDE? [ LAUGHTER .]
OUTSIDE? [ LAUGHTER .]
DID YOU WANT A LOT OF ICE OR [ LAUGHTER .]
DID YOU WANT A LOT OF ICE OR A LITTLE BIT OF ICE? DID YOU WANT A LOT OF ICE OR A LITTLE BIT OF ICE? [ LAUGHTER .]
A LITTLE BIT OF ICE? [ LAUGHTER .]
GODZILLA'S GETTING CLOSE, [ LAUGHTER .]
GODZILLA'S GETTING CLOSE, BUDDY.
GODZILLA'S GETTING CLOSE, BUDDY.
[ LAUGHS .]
BUDDY.
[ LAUGHS .]
JOE, YOU'RE TOO SCARED TO [ LAUGHS .]
JOE, YOU'RE TOO SCARED TO MOVE.
JOE, YOU'RE TOO SCARED TO MOVE.
[ LAUGHTER .]
MOVE.
[ LAUGHTER .]
OH, OH.
HOLY [BLEEP.]
[ LAUGHTER .]
OH, OH.
HOLY [BLEEP.]
SO, THAT'S $4.
75.
OH, OH.
HOLY [BLEEP.]
SO, THAT'S $4.
75.
JOE, WHAT -- WHAT IS THAT? SO, THAT'S $4.
75.
JOE, WHAT -- WHAT IS THAT? WHAT? JOE, WHAT -- WHAT IS THAT? WHAT? SO, YOU ONLY NEED TWO OF -- WHAT? SO, YOU ONLY NEED TWO OF -- [ LAUGHTER .]
OH, THERE WAS SOMETHING COMING OUT OF THAT WINDOW, MAN.
WOW.
[ LAUGHS .]
OUT OF THAT WINDOW, MAN.
WOW.
[ LAUGHS .]
WHAT'S THAT? WOW.
[ LAUGHS .]
WHAT'S THAT? [ LAUGHTER .]
WHAT'S THAT? [ LAUGHTER .]
I WANT TO GO JUST BACK TO THAT [ LAUGHTER .]
I WANT TO GO JUST BACK TO THAT GUY FOR A SECOND.
I WANT TO GO JUST BACK TO THAT GUY FOR A SECOND.
HE DIDN'T ASK FOR A NEW ICE.
GUY FOR A SECOND.
HE DIDN'T ASK FOR A NEW ICE.
NO.
HE DIDN'T ASK FOR A NEW ICE.
NO.
HE GAVE THAT ICE TO THE NO.
HE GAVE THAT ICE TO THE PERSON.
HE GAVE THAT ICE TO THE PERSON.
YOU GOT YOUR NOSE, YOU -- PERSON.
YOU GOT YOUR NOSE, YOU -- I WAS SMELLING RAINBOWS FOR A YOU GOT YOUR NOSE, YOU -- I WAS SMELLING RAINBOWS FOR A WEEK AND A HALF.
I WAS SMELLING RAINBOWS FOR A WEEK AND A HALF.
[ LAUGHTER .]
WEEK AND A HALF.
[ LAUGHTER .]
STICK WITH US 'CAUSE WHEN WE [ LAUGHTER .]
STICK WITH US 'CAUSE WHEN WE COME BACK, WE'LL TAKE A LOOK AT STICK WITH US 'CAUSE WHEN WE COME BACK, WE'LL TAKE A LOOK AT Q AND MURR'S TURN AS JANITORS IN COME BACK, WE'LL TAKE A LOOK AT Q AND MURR'S TURN AS JANITORS IN A FOOD COURT.
Q AND MURR'S TURN AS JANITORS IN A FOOD COURT.
STRAIGHT FROM THE VAULT.
A FOOD COURT.
STRAIGHT FROM THE VAULT.
WHAT IS THIS VAULT? STRAIGHT FROM THE VAULT.
WHAT IS THIS VAULT? [ CHUCKLES .]
HEY, WE'RE BACK, AND WE'RE TAKING A LOOK AT NEVER-BEFORE-SEEN CLIPS FROM TAKING A LOOK AT NEVER-BEFORE-SEEN CLIPS FROM THIS "IMPRACTICAL JOKERS" NEVER-BEFORE-SEEN CLIPS FROM THIS "IMPRACTICAL JOKERS" VAULT? THIS "IMPRACTICAL JOKERS" VAULT? THE VAULT, MAN.
VAULT? THE VAULT, MAN.
THAT'S WHERE WE KEEP ALL THIS.
THE VAULT, MAN.
THAT'S WHERE WE KEEP ALL THIS.
I DON'T KNOW ABOUT THIS THAT'S WHERE WE KEEP ALL THIS.
I DON'T KNOW ABOUT THIS THING.
I DON'T KNOW ABOUT THIS THING.
YOU GUYS REMEMBER WHEN WE THING.
YOU GUYS REMEMBER WHEN WE WERE AT OUR FAVORITE PLACE, YOU GUYS REMEMBER WHEN WE WERE AT OUR FAVORITE PLACE, WORKING AS JANITORS -- THE FOOD WERE AT OUR FAVORITE PLACE, WORKING AS JANITORS -- THE FOOD COURT? WORKING AS JANITORS -- THE FOOD COURT? OH, YEAH! COURT? OH, YEAH! SAL, TAPE THE FORK TO THE END OF OH, YEAH! SAL, TAPE THE FORK TO THE END OF YOUR BROOM, AND EAT OFF SAL, TAPE THE FORK TO THE END OF YOUR BROOM, AND EAT OFF SOMEBODY'S PLATE.
YOUR BROOM, AND EAT OFF SOMEBODY'S PLATE.
OH, MY GOD, THERE HE GOES! SOMEBODY'S PLATE.
OH, MY GOD, THERE HE GOES! OH, HE GOT ONE! OH, MY GOD, THERE HE GOES! OH, HE GOT ONE! [ LAUGHTER .]
OH, HE GOT ONE! [ LAUGHTER .]
WE KNOW WHAT JOE AND I DID [ LAUGHTER .]
WE KNOW WHAT JOE AND I DID THERE.
WE KNOW WHAT JOE AND I DID THERE.
WHY DON'T WE TAKE A LOOK AT WHAT THERE.
WHY DON'T WE TAKE A LOOK AT WHAT Q AND MURR DID AT THE FOOD WHY DON'T WE TAKE A LOOK AT WHAT Q AND MURR DID AT THE FOOD COURT? Q AND MURR DID AT THE FOOD COURT? OOH.
LOOK AT Q.
IT LOOKS LIKE THE OPENING CREDITS TO, LIKE, A BAD '90s IT LOOKS LIKE THE OPENING CREDITS TO, LIKE, A BAD '90s HORROR MOVIE CALLED CREDITS TO, LIKE, A BAD '90s HORROR MOVIE CALLED "THE CUSTODIAN.
" HORROR MOVIE CALLED "THE CUSTODIAN.
" [ LAUGHTER .]
"THE CUSTODIAN.
" [ LAUGHTER .]
Q, SEE THIS COUPLE EATING? [ LAUGHTER .]
Q, SEE THIS COUPLE EATING? KNEEL DOWN, AND LEAN INTO THEM.
Q, SEE THIS COUPLE EATING? KNEEL DOWN, AND LEAN INTO THEM.
AND I WANT YOU TO, LIKE, TELL KNEEL DOWN, AND LEAN INTO THEM.
AND I WANT YOU TO, LIKE, TELL THEM A SECRET I'M ABOUT TO TELL AND I WANT YOU TO, LIKE, TELL THEM A SECRET I'M ABOUT TO TELL YOU.
THEM A SECRET I'M ABOUT TO TELL YOU.
FOLKS, FOLKS, FOLKS.
YOU.
FOLKS, FOLKS, FOLKS.
DID YOU HEAR THE STORY OF THE FOLKS, FOLKS, FOLKS.
DID YOU HEAR THE STORY OF THE LITTLE GIRL WHO ATE HERE LAST DID YOU HEAR THE STORY OF THE LITTLE GIRL WHO ATE HERE LAST WEEK? LITTLE GIRL WHO ATE HERE LAST WEEK? DID YOU GUYS HEAR THE STORY WEEK? DID YOU GUYS HEAR THE STORY OF THE LITTLE GIRL WHO ATE HERE DID YOU GUYS HEAR THE STORY OF THE LITTLE GIRL WHO ATE HERE LAST WEEK? OF THE LITTLE GIRL WHO ATE HERE LAST WEEK? NO? LAST WEEK? NO? OKAY.
TELL THEM, BUDDY.
NO? OKAY.
TELL THEM, BUDDY.
[ LAUGHS .]
OKAY.
TELL THEM, BUDDY.
[ LAUGHS .]
YEAH, THE LITTLE GIRL, THAT'S YEAH, THE LITTLE GIRL, THAT'S RIGHT, WHO ATE HERE LAST WEEK.
TURNS OUT THAT, UH, SHE WAS 18.
RIGHT, WHO ATE HERE LAST WEEK.
TURNS OUT THAT, UH, SHE WAS 18.
SO, I TOTALLY TURNS OUT THAT, UH, SHE WAS 18.
SO, I TOTALLY HIT IT.
SO, I TOTALLY HIT IT.
[ LAUGHTER .]
HIT IT.
[ LAUGHTER .]
HEY.
[ LAUGHTER .]
HEY.
BOOM.
HEY.
BOOM.
[ LAUGHTER .]
BOOM.
[ LAUGHTER .]
TURNED OUT SHE WAS 18, WHICH IS [ LAUGHTER .]
TURNED OUT SHE WAS 18, WHICH IS LEGAL.
TURNED OUT SHE WAS 18, WHICH IS LEGAL.
[ LAUGHTER .]
LEGAL.
[ LAUGHTER .]
WAIT, HE JUST WINKED! [ LAUGHTER .]
WAIT, HE JUST WINKED! GO OVER TO THE COUPLE.
WAIT, HE JUST WINKED! GO OVER TO THE COUPLE.
YOUR TRASH BIN'S A LITTLE GO OVER TO THE COUPLE.
YOUR TRASH BIN'S A LITTLE FULL, Q.
YOUR TRASH BIN'S A LITTLE FULL, Q.
HOW 'BOUT YOU EMPTY GARBAGE FULL, Q.
HOW 'BOUT YOU EMPTY GARBAGE ONTO THE TABLE INSTEAD OF TAKING HOW 'BOUT YOU EMPTY GARBAGE ONTO THE TABLE INSTEAD OF TAKING IT OFF? ONTO THE TABLE INSTEAD OF TAKING IT OFF? [ LAUGHTER .]
IT OFF? [ LAUGHTER .]
KEEP GOING.
KEEP GOING.
[ LAUGHTER .]
KEEP GOING.
KEEP GOING.
[ LAUGHTER .]
KEEP GOING.
KEEP GOING.
[ LAUGHTER .]
HER EYES ARE, LIKE, BULGING OUT [ LAUGHTER .]
HER EYES ARE, LIKE, BULGING OUT OF HER HEAD.
HER EYES ARE, LIKE, BULGING OUT OF HER HEAD.
[ LAUGHTER .]
THEY ARE BOTH USING THE "I'M BUSY SIPPING, I DON'T NOTICE THIS" DEFENSE.
BUSY SIPPING, I DON'T NOTICE THIS" DEFENSE.
OH! THIS" DEFENSE.
OH! [ ALL CHEER .]
OH! [ ALL CHEER .]
[ LAUGHTER .]
[ ALL CHEER .]
[ LAUGHTER .]
I DO LIKE THAT THEY REVERTED [ LAUGHTER .]
I DO LIKE THAT THEY REVERTED TO THE "WHAT? WE'RE JUST I DO LIKE THAT THEY REVERTED TO THE "WHAT? WE'RE JUST SIPPING.
TO THE "WHAT? WE'RE JUST SIPPING.
WHAT'S HAPPENING AROUND US?" SIPPING.
WHAT'S HAPPENING AROUND US?" MUCH LIKE WHAT MY PARENTS DID WHAT'S HAPPENING AROUND US?" MUCH LIKE WHAT MY PARENTS DID WITH ME MY ENTIRE CHILDHOOD.
MUCH LIKE WHAT MY PARENTS DID WITH ME MY ENTIRE CHILDHOOD.
"HOW LONG TILL IT GOES AWAY?" WITH ME MY ENTIRE CHILDHOOD.
"HOW LONG TILL IT GOES AWAY?" [ LAUGHTER .]
"HOW LONG TILL IT GOES AWAY?" [ LAUGHTER .]
YOUR PARENTS HAD 25 YEARS OF [ LAUGHTER .]
YOUR PARENTS HAD 25 YEARS OF JUST SIPPING THROUGH STRAWS.
YOUR PARENTS HAD 25 YEARS OF JUST SIPPING THROUGH STRAWS.
"WHAT SHOULD WE DO ABOUT OUR JUST SIPPING THROUGH STRAWS.
"WHAT SHOULD WE DO ABOUT OUR SON?" "WHAT SHOULD WE DO ABOUT OUR SON?" "DON'T WORRY ABOUT IT, HONEY.
" SON?" "DON'T WORRY ABOUT IT, HONEY.
" [ LAUGHTER .]
"DON'T WORRY ABOUT IT, HONEY.
" [ LAUGHTER .]
ALL RIGHT.
[ LAUGHTER .]
ALL RIGHT.
NOW LET'S SEE WHAT MURR GOT INTO ALL RIGHT.
NOW LET'S SEE WHAT MURR GOT INTO WHEN HE WAS A JANITOR.
NOW LET'S SEE WHAT MURR GOT INTO WHEN HE WAS A JANITOR.
OH, YEAH.
ALL RIGHT, MURR, THESE THREE GUYS, THEIR TABLE'S DIRTY, AIN'T IT? GUYS, THEIR TABLE'S DIRTY, AIN'T IT? YEAH, AS A MATTER OF FACT, I IT? YEAH, AS A MATTER OF FACT, I DON'T THINK IT'S EVER GONNA GET YEAH, AS A MATTER OF FACT, I DON'T THINK IT'S EVER GONNA GET CLEAN.
DON'T THINK IT'S EVER GONNA GET CLEAN.
YEAH, YOU SHOULD CLEAN THAT CLEAN.
YEAH, YOU SHOULD CLEAN THAT TABLE BUT NEVER BE FINISHED YEAH, YOU SHOULD CLEAN THAT TABLE BUT NEVER BE FINISHED CLEANING THAT TABLE.
[ LAUGHTER .]
REALLY REACH, BRO.
REALLY REACH.
REALLY REACH, BRO.
REALLY REACH.
[ GRUNTS .]
REALLY REACH.
[ GRUNTS .]
LAY ON IT.
[ GRUNTS .]
LAY ON IT.
LAY ON THE TABLE.
LAY ON IT.
LAY ON THE TABLE.
[ LAUGHTER .]
LAY ON THE TABLE.
[ LAUGHTER .]
DUDE, GET THAT BALD GUY'S [ LAUGHTER .]
DUDE, GET THAT BALD GUY'S HEAD.
DUDE, GET THAT BALD GUY'S HEAD.
GET IT.
GET IT.
HEAD.
GET IT.
GET IT.
NO? GET IT.
GET IT.
NO? I'LL GET IT, I'LL GET IT.
NO? I'LL GET IT, I'LL GET IT.
THANK YOU, SIR.
I'LL GET IT, I'LL GET IT.
THANK YOU, SIR.
I'LL GET IT.
THANK YOU, SIR.
I'LL GET IT.
IT'S RIGHT ON THE SIDE.
I'LL GET IT.
IT'S RIGHT ON THE SIDE.
I CAN SEE IT.
IT'S RIGHT ON THE SIDE.
I CAN SEE IT.
I TRIED, I TRIED.
I CAN SEE IT.
I TRIED, I TRIED.
I SEE A STAIN, I GOT TO CLEAN I TRIED, I TRIED.
I SEE A STAIN, I GOT TO CLEAN IT.
I SEE A STAIN, I GOT TO CLEAN IT.
[ LAUGHTER .]
IT.
[ LAUGHTER .]
MURR, I WANT YOU TO APPROACH [ LAUGHTER .]
MURR, I WANT YOU TO APPROACH THE GUY IN THE WHITE T-SHIRT.
MURR, I WANT YOU TO APPROACH THE GUY IN THE WHITE T-SHIRT.
I'M GONNA HAVE YOU SHAKE HIS THE GUY IN THE WHITE T-SHIRT.
I'M GONNA HAVE YOU SHAKE HIS HAND.
I'M GONNA HAVE YOU SHAKE HIS HAND.
HI, GUYS.
HAND.
HI, GUYS.
I GOT TO SHAKE YOUR HAND.
HI, GUYS.
I GOT TO SHAKE YOUR HAND.
"CAUGHT A PEEK IN THE I GOT TO SHAKE YOUR HAND.
"CAUGHT A PEEK IN THE URINAL -- VERY IMPRESSIVE.
" "CAUGHT A PEEK IN THE URINAL -- VERY IMPRESSIVE.
" I'LL TELL YOU WHAT.
URINAL -- VERY IMPRESSIVE.
" I'LL TELL YOU WHAT.
I CAUGHT A PEEK AT THE I'LL TELL YOU WHAT.
I CAUGHT A PEEK AT THE URINALS -- IMPRESSIVE.
I CAUGHT A PEEK AT THE URINALS -- IMPRESSIVE.
[ LAUGHTER .]
URINALS -- IMPRESSIVE.
[ LAUGHTER .]
IT'S TRUE WHAT THEY SAY.
[ LAUGHTER .]
IT'S TRUE WHAT THEY SAY.
[ LAUGHTER .]
IT'S TRUE WHAT THEY SAY.
[ LAUGHTER .]
THE UNIFORM LETS YOU GET [ LAUGHTER .]
THE UNIFORM LETS YOU GET AWAY WITH SO MUCH.
THE UNIFORM LETS YOU GET AWAY WITH SO MUCH.
RIGHT.
AWAY WITH SO MUCH.
RIGHT.
WIPING THOSE GUYS' TABLE RIGHT.
WIPING THOSE GUYS' TABLE DOWN, YOU WOULD NEVER GET AWAY WIPING THOSE GUYS' TABLE DOWN, YOU WOULD NEVER GET AWAY WITH THAT.
DOWN, YOU WOULD NEVER GET AWAY WITH THAT.
THAT'S WHY I'VE STARTED TO WITH THAT.
THAT'S WHY I'VE STARTED TO WEAR SHIRTS EVERYWHERE THAT SAY THAT'S WHY I'VE STARTED TO WEAR SHIRTS EVERYWHERE THAT SAY MY NAME ON IT.
WEAR SHIRTS EVERYWHERE THAT SAY MY NAME ON IT.
OH, THAT'S YOU.
YOU DO THAT.
MY NAME ON IT.
OH, THAT'S YOU.
YOU DO THAT.
[ LAUGHTER .]
OH, THAT'S YOU.
YOU DO THAT.
[ LAUGHTER .]
IS THAT WHY -- IT MAKES YOUR [ LAUGHTER .]
IS THAT WHY -- IT MAKES YOUR LIFE BETTER? IS THAT WHY -- IT MAKES YOUR LIFE BETTER? THIS IS FROM THE GAS STATION.
LIFE BETTER? THIS IS FROM THE GAS STATION.
LOOKS LIKE IT.
THIS IS FROM THE GAS STATION.
LOOKS LIKE IT.
ALL RIGHT.
LOOKS LIKE IT.
ALL RIGHT.
WHEN WE COME BACK, WE ARE GOING ALL RIGHT.
WHEN WE COME BACK, WE ARE GOING TO SHOW YOU A BRAND-NEW WHEN WE COME BACK, WE ARE GOING TO SHOW YOU A BRAND-NEW "IMPRACTICAL JOKERS" CHALLENGE.
TO SHOW YOU A BRAND-NEW "IMPRACTICAL JOKERS" CHALLENGE.
AND WHAT HAPPENS WHEN WE TELL "IMPRACTICAL JOKERS" CHALLENGE.
AND WHAT HAPPENS WHEN WE TELL THIS GUY THAT HE WAS ON AND WHAT HAPPENS WHEN WE TELL THIS GUY THAT HE WAS ON "IMPRACTICAL JOKERS"? THIS GUY THAT HE WAS ON "IMPRACTICAL JOKERS"? HELLO, THERE.
SO, GUYS, I WAS POKING AROUND THE VAULT, AND GUESS WHAT I FOUND.
THE VAULT, AND GUESS WHAT I FOUND.
LOVE THAT VAULT! FOUND.
LOVE THAT VAULT! I LOVE THAT VAULT.
LOVE THAT VAULT! I LOVE THAT VAULT.
I FOUND A FULL CHALLENGE! I LOVE THAT VAULT.
I FOUND A FULL CHALLENGE! WHAT?! I FOUND A FULL CHALLENGE! WHAT?! NOT ONE TURN OR TWO TURNS -- WHAT?! NOT ONE TURN OR TWO TURNS -- ALL OF OUR TURNS.
NOT ONE TURN OR TWO TURNS -- ALL OF OUR TURNS.
WHOA! ALL OF OUR TURNS.
WHOA! WE NEVER AIRED IT? WHOA! WE NEVER AIRED IT? NO.
WE FORGOT TO PUT IT ON.
WE NEVER AIRED IT? NO.
WE FORGOT TO PUT IT ON.
I TOLD YOU TO REMIND US.
NO.
WE FORGOT TO PUT IT ON.
I TOLD YOU TO REMIND US.
YOU KNOW WHAT? YOU'RE RIGHT.
I TOLD YOU TO REMIND US.
YOU KNOW WHAT? YOU'RE RIGHT.
WE SHOULD REALLY GO THROUGH YOU KNOW WHAT? YOU'RE RIGHT.
WE SHOULD REALLY GO THROUGH THAT VAULT.
WE SHOULD REALLY GO THROUGH THAT VAULT.
I FEEL LIKE THERE'S A LOT OF THAT VAULT.
I FEEL LIKE THERE'S A LOT OF GOLD DOWN THERE.
I FEEL LIKE THERE'S A LOT OF GOLD DOWN THERE.
JUST EVERY TIME WE GO DOWN GOLD DOWN THERE.
JUST EVERY TIME WE GO DOWN THERE, WE JUST PARTY AND PARTY.
JUST EVERY TIME WE GO DOWN THERE, WE JUST PARTY AND PARTY.
OH, IT'S ALL PARTIES IN THE THERE, WE JUST PARTY AND PARTY.
OH, IT'S ALL PARTIES IN THE VAULT, NO WORK.
OH, IT'S ALL PARTIES IN THE VAULT, NO WORK.
WHERE IS THE VAULT?! VAULT, NO WORK.
WHERE IS THE VAULT?! IT'S DOWNSTAIRS.
WHERE IS THE VAULT?! IT'S DOWNSTAIRS.
SO, GUYS, HERE YOU GO -- A IT'S DOWNSTAIRS.
SO, GUYS, HERE YOU GO -- A CHALLENGE YOU'VE NEVER SEEN SO, GUYS, HERE YOU GO -- A CHALLENGE YOU'VE NEVER SEEN BEFORE STRAIGHT FROM THE CHALLENGE YOU'VE NEVER SEEN BEFORE STRAIGHT FROM THE "JOKERS" VAULT.
WE WANT TO KNOW YOUR OPINION, WHICH IS WHY WE'RE CONDUCTING A FOCUS GROUP! WE'RE CONDUCTING A WHY ARE YOU SO ANGRY? WHY ARE YOU SO ANGRY? I'M FOCUSED! I'M FOCUSED! ON WHAT, YOU ASK? WE HAVE NO IDEA BECAUSE THE ON WHAT, YOU ASK? WE HAVE NO IDEA BECAUSE THE QUESTIONS WE'RE ASKING HAVE BEEN WE HAVE NO IDEA BECAUSE THE QUESTIONS WE'RE ASKING HAVE BEEN WRITTEN BY THE OTHER GUYS.
QUESTIONS WE'RE ASKING HAVE BEEN WRITTEN BY THE OTHER GUYS.
IF YOU CANNOT ASK EVERY WRITTEN BY THE OTHER GUYS.
IF YOU CANNOT ASK EVERY SINGLE QUESTION, YOU LOSE! IF YOU CANNOT ASK EVERY SINGLE QUESTION, YOU LOSE! Both: FOCUS! HOW ARE YOU? HAVE A SEAT HERE.
SO, HAVE YOU EVER DONE A FOCUS HAVE A SEAT HERE.
SO, HAVE YOU EVER DONE A FOCUS GROUP BEFORE? SO, HAVE YOU EVER DONE A FOCUS GROUP BEFORE? BASICALLY, WE JUST GET YOUR GROUP BEFORE? BASICALLY, WE JUST GET YOUR OPINIONS AND THOUGHTS ON STUFF BASICALLY, WE JUST GET YOUR OPINIONS AND THOUGHTS ON STUFF AND ASK YOU A BUNCH OF OPINIONS AND THOUGHTS ON STUFF AND ASK YOU A BUNCH OF QUESTIONS.
AND ASK YOU A BUNCH OF QUESTIONS.
LET'S DO IT.
QUESTIONS.
LET'S DO IT.
SO, HOW MANY HOURS OF SLEEP DO LET'S DO IT.
SO, HOW MANY HOURS OF SLEEP DO YOU AVERAGE PER NIGHT? SO, HOW MANY HOURS OF SLEEP DO YOU AVERAGE PER NIGHT? ABOUT SEVEN OR EIGHT? YOU AVERAGE PER NIGHT? ABOUT SEVEN OR EIGHT? ALL RIGHT.
ABOUT SEVEN OR EIGHT? ALL RIGHT.
[ SIGHS .]
ALL RIGHT.
[ SIGHS .]
UM [ SIGHS .]
UM [ LAUGHTER .]
NO.
SNITCHES GET STITCHES.
I'LL CUT A BITCH.
SNITCHES GET STITCHES.
I'LL CUT A BITCH.
[ LAUGHTER .]
[ LAUGHTER .]
I'LL GO FIRST.
THERE WAS THIS TIME WHEN I WAS I'LL GO FIRST.
THERE WAS THIS TIME WHEN I WAS ON THE BUS AND I DIDN'T HOLD IT THERE WAS THIS TIME WHEN I WAS ON THE BUS AND I DIDN'T HOLD IT IN FOR A FIELD TRIP.
ON THE BUS AND I DIDN'T HOLD IT IN FOR A FIELD TRIP.
WE WERE GOING TO THE IN FOR A FIELD TRIP.
WE WERE GOING TO THE TURTLE BACK ZOO, AND I [BLEEP.]
WE WERE GOING TO THE TURTLE BACK ZOO, AND I [BLEEP.]
MY PANTS.
TURTLE BACK ZOO, AND I [BLEEP.]
MY PANTS.
YOU? MY PANTS.
YOU? UH [SIGHS.]
YOU? UH [SIGHS.]
[ LAUGHS .]
UH [SIGHS.]
[ LAUGHS .]
IF I LOST 20 POUNDS, WOULD [ LAUGHS .]
IF I LOST 20 POUNDS, WOULD YOU DREAM OF ME? IF I LOST 20 POUNDS, WOULD YOU DREAM OF ME? [ LAUGHS .]
YOU DREAM OF ME? [ LAUGHS .]
NO.
[ LAUGHS .]
NO.
NO.
NO.
NO.
[ LAUGHTER .]
[ LAUGHTER .]
"BE BLACK.
" [ Chuckling .]
OKAY.
"BE BLACK.
" [ Chuckling .]
OKAY.
GREAT.
GREAT.
GOOD LUCK WITH THAT ONE, PAL.
GOOD LUCK WITH THAT ONE, PAL.
[ LAUGHS .]
[ LAUGHS .]
[ SIGHS .]
[ LAUGHTER .]
[ SIGHS .]
[ LAUGHTER .]
GO FOR IT.
[ LAUGHTER .]
GO FOR IT.
I'VE NEVER BEEN KISSED.
GO FOR IT.
I'VE NEVER BEEN KISSED.
WOULD YOU DO ME THE HONORS? I'VE NEVER BEEN KISSED.
WOULD YOU DO ME THE HONORS? OH! [ CHEERING .]
CONGRATULATIONS, JOE! [ CHUCKLES .]
CONGRATULATIONS, JOE! [ CHUCKLES .]
[ DING! .]
[ CHUCKLES .]
[ DING! .]
HELLO.
[ DING! .]
HELLO.
HI.
I'M JAMES.
HOW ARE YOU? HELLO.
HI.
I'M JAMES.
HOW ARE YOU? HELLO, JAMES.
HI.
I'M JAMES.
HOW ARE YOU? HELLO, JAMES.
WHAT'S YOUR NAME? WHAT'S YOUR NAME? PETER.
PETER, NICE TO MEET YOU.
HAVE A SEAT.
HAVE A SEAT.
THIS GUY IS SUPER SERIOUS THIS GUY IS SUPER SERIOUS ABOUT HIS OPINIONS.
SHOWS UP IN A SUIT.
ABOUT HIS OPINIONS.
SHOWS UP IN A SUIT.
HE'S HERE TO PLAY.
SHOWS UP IN A SUIT.
HE'S HERE TO PLAY.
I'M GOING TO ASK YOU NOW A HE'S HERE TO PLAY.
I'M GOING TO ASK YOU NOW A SERIES OF QUESTIONS, OKAY? I'M GOING TO ASK YOU NOW A SERIES OF QUESTIONS, OKAY? ALL RIGHT.
SERIES OF QUESTIONS, OKAY? ALL RIGHT.
OKAY.
ALL RIGHT.
OKAY.
SO, I WANT YOU TO ANSWER OKAY.
SO, I WANT YOU TO ANSWER "ALWAYS," "SOMETIMES," OR SO, I WANT YOU TO ANSWER "ALWAYS," "SOMETIMES," OR "NEVER.
" "ALWAYS," "SOMETIMES," OR "NEVER.
" OKAY.
"NEVER.
" OKAY.
"I ENJOY A CUP OF COFFEE.
" OKAY.
"I ENJOY A CUP OF COFFEE.
" ALWAYS.
"I ENJOY A CUP OF COFFEE.
" ALWAYS.
AT NIGHT? ALWAYS.
AT NIGHT? NEVER.
AT NIGHT? NEVER.
"I TAKE LONG SHOWERS.
" NEVER.
"I TAKE LONG SHOWERS.
" ALWAYS.
"I TAKE LONG SHOWERS.
" ALWAYS.
WITH CLOSE RELATIVES? ALWAYS.
WITH CLOSE RELATIVES? [ LAUGHTER .]
WITH CLOSE RELATIVES? [ LAUGHTER .]
NEVER.
[ LAUGHTER .]
NEVER.
[ LAUGHTER .]
NEVER.
[ LAUGHTER .]
"I LIKE TO KISS.
" [ LAUGHTER .]
"I LIKE TO KISS.
" ALWAYS.
"I LIKE TO KISS.
" ALWAYS.
ASS? ALWAYS.
ASS? NEVER.
ASS? NEVER.
"I'VE BEEN TO A NEVER.
"I'VE BEEN TO A DRIVE-THROUGH.
" "I'VE BEEN TO A DRIVE-THROUGH.
" SOMETIMES.
DRIVE-THROUGH.
" SOMETIMES.
STRIP CLUB? SOMETIMES.
STRIP CLUB? [ LAUGHTER .]
STRIP CLUB? [ LAUGHTER .]
NEVER.
[ LAUGHTER .]
NEVER.
KEEP GOING.
NEVER.
KEEP GOING.
NEXT QUESTION IS KEEP GOING.
NEXT QUESTION IS "THEY SAY NEXT QUESTION IS "THEY SAY WHAT DO THEY SAY, MURR? "THEY SAY WHAT DO THEY SAY, MURR? WHAT DO THEY SAY? WHAT DO THEY SAY, MURR? WHAT DO THEY SAY? WHAT DO THEY SAY? WHAT DO THEY SAY? WHAT DO THEY SAY? THEY SAY THAT "ONE IN THE WHAT DO THEY SAY? THEY SAY THAT "ONE IN THE HAND IS WORTH TWO IN THE BUSH.
" THEY SAY THAT "ONE IN THE HAND IS WORTH TWO IN THE BUSH.
" HOW MANY HA-- HOW MANY HANDS DO HAND IS WORTH TWO IN THE BUSH.
" HOW MANY HA-- HOW MANY HANDS DO YOU PREFER IN YOUR BUSH? HOW MANY HA-- HOW MANY HANDS DO YOU PREFER IN YOUR BUSH? [ LAUGHTER .]
YOU PREFER IN YOUR BUSH? [ LAUGHTER .]
I HAVE A BUSH? [ LAUGHTER .]
I HAVE A BUSH? THAT'S WHAT SHE SAID.
I HAVE A BUSH? THAT'S WHAT SHE SAID.
[ LAUGHTER .]
THAT'S WHAT SHE SAID.
[ LAUGHTER .]
THIS GUY'S LETTING LOOSE NOW, [ LAUGHTER .]
THIS GUY'S LETTING LOOSE NOW, THAT'S IT.
THIS GUY'S LETTING LOOSE NOW, THAT'S IT.
[ CHUCKLES .]
THAT'S IT.
[ CHUCKLES .]
WHAT DO YOU HAVE TO SAY TO [ CHUCKLES .]
WHAT DO YOU HAVE TO SAY TO THAT PIECE OF POOP THAT JUST WHAT DO YOU HAVE TO SAY TO THAT PIECE OF POOP THAT JUST REFUSES TO FLUSH? THAT PIECE OF POOP THAT JUST REFUSES TO FLUSH? [ LAUGHTER .]
REFUSES TO FLUSH? [ LAUGHTER .]
OBJECTIVELY SPEAKING.
[ LAUGHTER .]
OBJECTIVELY SPEAKING.
OKAY, UM, I'M TRYING TO OBJECTIVELY SPEAKING.
OKAY, UM, I'M TRYING TO VISUALIZE.
OKAY, UM, I'M TRYING TO VISUALIZE.
[ LAUGHTER .]
VISUALIZE.
[ LAUGHTER .]
"SO, DO ME A FAVOR -- PRETEND [ LAUGHTER .]
"SO, DO ME A FAVOR -- PRETEND I'M A PIECE OF POOP.
" "SO, DO ME A FAVOR -- PRETEND I'M A PIECE OF POOP.
" SO, LET'S ROLE-PLAY.
I'M A PIECE OF POOP.
" SO, LET'S ROLE-PLAY.
OKAY.
SO, LET'S ROLE-PLAY.
OKAY.
LET'S SAY THAT I'M THAT PIECE OKAY.
LET'S SAY THAT I'M THAT PIECE OF POOP IN QUESTION.
LET'S SAY THAT I'M THAT PIECE OF POOP IN QUESTION.
AND FLUSH.
OF POOP IN QUESTION.
AND FLUSH.
FLUSH.
AND FLUSH.
FLUSH.
[ IMITATES FLUSHING .]
FLUSH.
[ IMITATES FLUSHING .]
[ LAUGHTER .]
[ DING! .]
HERE WE GO, BUDDY.
[ LAUGHTER .]
HERE WE GO, BUDDY.
[ LAUGHTER .]
POINT TO A PLACE ON MY BODY [ LAUGHTER .]
POINT TO A PLACE ON MY BODY THAT YOU THINK COULD BE POINT TO A PLACE ON MY BODY THAT YOU THINK COULD BE IMPROVED.
THAT YOU THINK COULD BE IMPROVED.
[ LAUGHTER .]
IMPROVED.
[ LAUGHTER .]
NO HESITATION! NO HESITATION! YOU'D CHANGE MY FACE? WHAT PART OF MY BODY COULD BE IMPROVED? IMPROVED? [ LAUGHTER .]
[ LAUGHTER .]
ALL RIGHT.
ALL RIGHT.
WELL, I'M JUST GONNA ASK YOU A FEW QUESTIONS, AND THERE'S NO WELL, I'M JUST GONNA ASK YOU A FEW QUESTIONS, AND THERE'S NO WRONG ANSWERS.
FEW QUESTIONS, AND THERE'S NO WRONG ANSWERS.
HERE HE GOES.
WRONG ANSWERS.
HERE HE GOES.
[ LAUGHTER .]
HERE HE GOES.
[ LAUGHTER .]
YOU ASKED FOR IT! [ LAUGHTER .]
YOU ASKED FOR IT! WHAT'S YOUR TECHNIQUE WHEN YOU ASKED FOR IT! WHAT'S YOUR TECHNIQUE WHEN YOU GO DOWNTOWN? OH, I MEANT, LIKE, TRAIN OR BUS OR [ LAUGHTER .]
OR [ LAUGHTER .]
[ Chuckling .]
I SEE.
[ LAUGHTER .]
[ Chuckling .]
I SEE.
YOU MEANT [ Chuckling .]
I SEE.
YOU MEANT OH! YOU MEANT OH! [ LAUGHTER .]
OH! [ LAUGHTER .]
ROOTY-TOOT-TOOT, YOU KNOW? [ LAUGHTER .]
ROOTY-TOOT-TOOT, YOU KNOW? DROPPED A ROOTY-TOOT-TOOT! DROPPED A ROOTY-TOOT-TOOT! [ DING! .]
SO, WE JUST ASK A SERIES OF QUESTIONS KIND OF TO TRACK QUESTIONS KIND OF TO TRACK PEOPLE'S PERSONAL HABITS.
PEOPLE'S PERSONAL HABITS.
OKAY, JAMES.
COOL.
DELIVER IT.
JUST READ IT.
JUST READ IT.
JUST READ IT.
JUST READ IT.
DO YOU THINK I SHOULD FINALLY JUST READ IT.
DO YOU THINK I SHOULD FINALLY GIVE UP ON THIS GAME OF HIDE AND DO YOU THINK I SHOULD FINALLY GIVE UP ON THIS GAME OF HIDE AND SEEK? GIVE UP ON THIS GAME OF HIDE AND SEEK? UH SEEK? UH NOW, SAL, YELL, "I GIVE UP.
" UH NOW, SAL, YELL, "I GIVE UP.
" I GIVE UP! [ CHUCKLES .]
[ CHUCKLES .]
[ DOOR OPENS .]
[ CHUCKLES .]
[ DOOR OPENS .]
OH, MY GOD! [ DOOR OPENS .]
OH, MY GOD! [ LAUGHTER .]
AND WE JUST ASK A SERIES OF QUESTIONS.
OKAY, JAMES.
COOL.
DELIVER IT.
JUST READ IT.
DO YOU THINK I SHOULD FINALLY JUST READ IT.
DO YOU THINK I SHOULD FINALLY GIVE UP ON THIS GAME OF HIDE AND DO YOU THINK I SHOULD FINALLY GIVE UP ON THIS GAME OF HIDE AND SEEK? GIVE UP ON THIS GAME OF HIDE AND SEEK? NOW, SAL, YELL, "I GIVE UP.
" SEEK? NOW, SAL, YELL, "I GIVE UP.
" I GIVE UP! NOW, SAL, YELL, "I GIVE UP.
" I GIVE UP! [ CHUCKLES .]
I GIVE UP! [ CHUCKLES .]
[ CHUCKLES .]
[ CHUCKLES .]
[ CHUCKLES .]
OH, MY GOD! [ CHUCKLES .]
OH, MY GOD! [ LAUGHTER .]
OH, MY GOD! [ LAUGHTER .]
[ DRAMATIC MUSIC PLAYS .]
[ LAUGHTER .]
[ DRAMATIC MUSIC PLAYS .]
I WIN! [ DRAMATIC MUSIC PLAYS .]
I WIN! [ LAUGHTER .]
YOU KNOW, SHE WINS.
[ LAUGHTER .]
[ DING! .]
[ LAUGHTER .]
[ DING! .]
I STILL DON'T UNDERSTAND HOW [ DING! .]
I STILL DON'T UNDERSTAND HOW THAT HAPPENED.
I STILL DON'T UNDERSTAND HOW THAT HAPPENED.
YOU PUT A CHILD IN A CLOSET.
THAT HAPPENED.
YOU PUT A CHILD IN A CLOSET.
I WAS IN THAT ROOM FOR LIKE 40 YOU PUT A CHILD IN A CLOSET.
I WAS IN THAT ROOM FOR LIKE 40 MINUTES.
I WAS IN THAT ROOM FOR LIKE 40 MINUTES.
[ LAUGHTER .]
MINUTES.
[ LAUGHTER .]
WE JUST PUT HER IN THE CORNER [ LAUGHTER .]
WE JUST PUT HER IN THE CORNER WITH, LIKE, AN ICE POP.
WE JUST PUT HER IN THE CORNER WITH, LIKE, AN ICE POP.
WE'RE LIKE, "Shh, HONEY.
" WITH, LIKE, AN ICE POP.
WE'RE LIKE, "Shh, HONEY.
" I TOOK THAT WOMAN'S ADVICE.
WE'RE LIKE, "Shh, HONEY.
" I TOOK THAT WOMAN'S ADVICE.
I GREW THE BEARD TO WORK ON THIS I TOOK THAT WOMAN'S ADVICE.
I GREW THE BEARD TO WORK ON THIS FACE.
I GREW THE BEARD TO WORK ON THIS FACE.
YOU FIXED IT.
FACE.
YOU FIXED IT.
THAT WAS HURTFUL.
YOU FIXED IT.
THAT WAS HURTFUL.
WELL, I MEAN, I DON'T WANT TO THAT WAS HURTFUL.
WELL, I MEAN, I DON'T WANT TO SAY ANYTHING, BUT I'VE BEEN WELL, I MEAN, I DON'T WANT TO SAY ANYTHING, BUT I'VE BEEN KISSED TWICE SINCE THEN.
SAY ANYTHING, BUT I'VE BEEN KISSED TWICE SINCE THEN.
WOW! KISSED TWICE SINCE THEN.
WOW! TWICE.
WOW! TWICE.
ALL RIGHT.
TWICE.
ALL RIGHT.
BOTH TIMES IN THE VAULT, ALL RIGHT.
BOTH TIMES IN THE VAULT, RIGHT? BOTH TIMES IN THE VAULT, RIGHT? YEAH! I LOVE THAT VAULT! RIGHT? YEAH! I LOVE THAT VAULT! ANOTHER REALLY COOL THING YEAH! I LOVE THAT VAULT! ANOTHER REALLY COOL THING THAT HAPPENED DURING THIS FOCUS ANOTHER REALLY COOL THING THAT HAPPENED DURING THIS FOCUS GROUP IS SOMETHING WE GET ASKED THAT HAPPENED DURING THIS FOCUS GROUP IS SOMETHING WE GET ASKED A LOT, WHICH IS, "WHAT HAPPENS GROUP IS SOMETHING WE GET ASKED A LOT, WHICH IS, "WHAT HAPPENS WHEN PEOPLE FIND OUT THEY'RE ON A LOT, WHICH IS, "WHAT HAPPENS WHEN PEOPLE FIND OUT THEY'RE ON 'IMPRACTICAL JOKERS'?" WHEN PEOPLE FIND OUT THEY'RE ON 'IMPRACTICAL JOKERS'?" WE HAVE ONE OF THOSE MOMENTS 'IMPRACTICAL JOKERS'?" WE HAVE ONE OF THOSE MOMENTS RIGHT NOW.
WE HAVE ONE OF THOSE MOMENTS RIGHT NOW.
LET'S TAKE A LOOK.
RIGHT NOW.
LET'S TAKE A LOOK.
YEP.
LET'S TAKE A LOOK.
YEP.
OKAY.
YEP.
OKAY.
HAVE YOU EVER PLAYED ORGANIZED OKAY.
HAVE YOU EVER PLAYED ORGANIZED SPORTS? HAVE YOU EVER PLAYED ORGANIZED SPORTS? YES.
SPORTS? YES.
YES.
RIGHT.
WHAT KIND? YES.
YES.
RIGHT.
WHAT KIND? BASKETBALL, FOOTBALL, YES.
RIGHT.
WHAT KIND? BASKETBALL, FOOTBALL, BASEBALL.
BASKETBALL, FOOTBALL, BASEBALL.
THIS GUY'S REALLY LOW-KEY.
BASEBALL.
THIS GUY'S REALLY LOW-KEY.
HE IS.
THIS GUY'S REALLY LOW-KEY.
HE IS.
WE GOT TO GO BIG ON THIS GUY.
HE IS.
WE GOT TO GO BIG ON THIS GUY.
NEXT QUESTION.
WE GOT TO GO BIG ON THIS GUY.
NEXT QUESTION.
GOOD LUCK.
[ LAUGHTER .]
THESE QUESTIONS ARE GETTING ME.
[ LAUGHTER .]
YOU EVER WATCH [ LAUGHTER .]
YOU EVER WATCH "IMPRACTICAL JOKERS"? YOU EVER WATCH "IMPRACTICAL JOKERS"? WHAT'S THAT? "IMPRACTICAL JOKERS"? WHAT'S THAT? "IMPRACTICAL JOKERS.
" WHAT'S THAT? "IMPRACTICAL JOKERS.
" OH, HE KNOWS US! "IMPRACTICAL JOKERS.
" OH, HE KNOWS US! AT NIGHT, IT'S A CABLE SHOW OH, HE KNOWS US! AT NIGHT, IT'S A CABLE SHOW ABOUT THESE FOUR GUYS WHO AT NIGHT, IT'S A CABLE SHOW ABOUT THESE FOUR GUYS WHO CHALLENGE EACH OTHER TO SAY AND ABOUT THESE FOUR GUYS WHO CHALLENGE EACH OTHER TO SAY AND DO THE MOST CRAZIEST THINGS.
CHALLENGE EACH OTHER TO SAY AND DO THE MOST CRAZIEST THINGS.
REALLY? DO THE MOST CRAZIEST THINGS.
REALLY? IT IS RIDICULOUS.
REALLY? IT IS RIDICULOUS.
REALLY? IT IS RIDICULOUS.
REALLY? HE DOESN'T KNOW IT'S HIM.
REALLY? HE DOESN'T KNOW IT'S HIM.
ONE TIME, THEY WERE IN A BED HE DOESN'T KNOW IT'S HIM.
ONE TIME, THEY WERE IN A BED STORE WHERE THEY SELL BEDS, AND ONE TIME, THEY WERE IN A BED STORE WHERE THEY SELL BEDS, AND THE GUY WAS PRETENDING LIKE HE STORE WHERE THEY SELL BEDS, AND THE GUY WAS PRETENDING LIKE HE WAS THE SALESMAN.
THE GUY WAS PRETENDING LIKE HE WAS THE SALESMAN.
SO, GUY GOT ON THE BED, SO HE WAS THE SALESMAN.
SO, GUY GOT ON THE BED, SO HE GETS ON THE BED AND WAS LIKE, SO, GUY GOT ON THE BED, SO HE GETS ON THE BED AND WAS LIKE, "GET ON THE BED WITH HIM.
" GETS ON THE BED AND WAS LIKE, "GET ON THE BED WITH HIM.
" THIS IS IKEA.
"GET ON THE BED WITH HIM.
" THIS IS IKEA.
THIS IS SAL'S BIT IN IKEA.
THIS IS IKEA.
THIS IS SAL'S BIT IN IKEA.
GOT ON THE BED WITH HIM, AND THIS IS SAL'S BIT IN IKEA.
GOT ON THE BED WITH HIM, AND THEN HE SAYS, "OKAY, NOW SPOON GOT ON THE BED WITH HIM, AND THEN HE SAYS, "OKAY, NOW SPOON HIM.
" THEN HE SAYS, "OKAY, NOW SPOON HIM.
" "SPOON THE GUY"? HIM.
" "SPOON THE GUY"? GET OUT OF HERE.
"SPOON THE GUY"? GET OUT OF HERE.
DID HE DO IT? GET OUT OF HERE.
DID HE DO IT? DID THE GUY SPOON HIM? DID HE DO IT? DID THE GUY SPOON HIM? YEAH, HE DID.
DID THE GUY SPOON HIM? YEAH, HE DID.
OH, HE SOUNDS LIKE THE BEST YEAH, HE DID.
OH, HE SOUNDS LIKE THE BEST ONE ON THE SHOW.
OH, HE SOUNDS LIKE THE BEST ONE ON THE SHOW.
[ LAUGHS .]
ONE ON THE SHOW.
[ LAUGHS .]
THEY GOT BALLS -- ALL OF [ LAUGHS .]
THEY GOT BALLS -- ALL OF THEM.
THEY GOT BALLS -- ALL OF THEM.
THEY ALL OF THEM GOT HUGE BALLS.
THEM.
THEY ALL OF THEM GOT HUGE BALLS.
THAT'S COOL, THAT'S COOL.
THAT'S COOL, THAT'S COOL.
YEAH.
YOU SHOULD WATCH IT.
THAT'S GREAT.
ALL RIGHT.
T.
WELL, BOB, THAT WAS ACTUALLY -- WELL, BOB, THAT WAS ACTUALLY -- YOU DID GREAT, AND ACTUALLY THE YOU DID GREAT, AND ACTUALLY THE CLIENT'S GONNA COME IN JUST TO SAY HELLO.
CLIENT'S GONNA COME IN JUST TO SAY HELLO.
LET'S SEE.
SAY HELLO.
LET'S SEE.
HELLO, THERE.
LET'S SEE.
HELLO, THERE.
YOU LIKE THAT SHOW HELLO, THERE.
YOU LIKE THAT SHOW "IMPRACTICAL JOKERS", HUH? YOU LIKE THAT SHOW "IMPRACTICAL JOKERS", HUH? I KNEW HE WAS "IMPRACTICAL JOKERS", HUH? I KNEW HE WAS [ LAUGHTER .]
I KNEW HE WAS [ LAUGHTER .]
I WAS SAYING, "WAIT A MINUTE.
" [ LAUGHTER .]
I WAS SAYING, "WAIT A MINUTE.
" LIKE, WAIT A MINUTE.
I'M SAYING, YOU CATS GOT BALLS, MAN.
[ LAUGHTER .]
MAN.
[ LAUGHTER .]
WE WERE CRYING BACK THERE [ LAUGHTER .]
WE WERE CRYING BACK THERE LISTENING TO YOU DESCRIBE OUR WE WERE CRYING BACK THERE LISTENING TO YOU DESCRIBE OUR SHOW.
LISTENING TO YOU DESCRIBE OUR SHOW.
I'M GONNA BE HONEST WITH YOU, SHOW.
I'M GONNA BE HONEST WITH YOU, MAN.
I'M GONNA BE HONEST WITH YOU, MAN.
THERE'S NOT MANY TV SHOWS I MAN.
THERE'S NOT MANY TV SHOWS I WATCH, BUT YOURS IS A GREAT THERE'S NOT MANY TV SHOWS I WATCH, BUT YOURS IS A GREAT [BLEEP.]
SHOW.
WATCH, BUT YOURS IS A GREAT [BLEEP.]
SHOW.
THANK YOU.
[BLEEP.]
SHOW.
THANK YOU.
WE APPRECIATE IT.
THANK YOU.
WE APPRECIATE IT.
DUDE, THAT MEANS A LOT.
WE APPRECIATE IT.
DUDE, THAT MEANS A LOT.
WELL, WE'RE GLAD YOU COULD BE DUDE, THAT MEANS A LOT.
WELL, WE'RE GLAD YOU COULD BE PART OF IT.
WELL, WE'RE GLAD YOU COULD BE PART OF IT.
THANK YOU SO MUCH.
PART OF IT.
THANK YOU SO MUCH.
OH, MAN.
THANK YOU SO MUCH.
OH, MAN.
HOW DID THAT GUY NOT KNOW IT OH, MAN.
HOW DID THAT GUY NOT KNOW IT WAS YOU HE WAS TALKING TO? HOW DID THAT GUY NOT KNOW IT WAS YOU HE WAS TALKING TO? HOW HAVE I NOT BEEN INVITED WAS YOU HE WAS TALKING TO? HOW HAVE I NOT BEEN INVITED TO THE VAULT? EVEN IF YOU KNEW WHERE THE VAULT WAS, YOU DON'T KNOW THE CODE TO GET IN.
VAULT WAS, YOU DON'T KNOW THE CODE TO GET IN.
ALL RIGHT.
FAIR ENOUGH.
ALL RIGHT.
FAIR ENOUGH.
DON'T EVEN WORRY.
THANKS FOR TUNING IN TO "IMPRACTICAL JOKERS.
" "IMPRACTICAL JOKERS.
" WE'LL SEE YOU SOON! WE'LL SEE YOU SOON! GUYS, LET'S HEAD DOWN TO THE GUYS, LET'S HEAD DOWN TO THE VAULT, SHALL WE? VAULT, SHALL WE? YEAH, ALL RIGHT! YEAH, ALL RIGHT! I GET TO GO TO THE VAULT! [ BUZZES .]
I GET TO GO TO THE VAULT! [ BUZZES .]
[ BUZZES .]
[ BUZZES .]
[ BUZZES .]
THAT'S SILLY.
[ BUZZES .]
THAT'S SILLY.
THAT'S JUST SILLY.
THAT'S SILLY.
THAT'S JUST SILLY.
I'M NOT EVEN GONNA PLAY ALONG.
THAT'S JUST SILLY.
I'M NOT EVEN GONNA PLAY ALONG.
AND THAT'S WHY YOU NEVER GET I'M NOT EVEN GONNA PLAY ALONG.
AND THAT'S WHY YOU NEVER GET TO THE VAULT.
AND THAT'S WHY YOU NEVER GET TO THE VAULT.
THAT'S WHY YOU NEVER SEE IT.
TO THE VAULT.
THAT'S WHY YOU NEVER SEE IT.
THAT'S RIGHT.
THAT'S WHY YOU NEVER SEE IT.
THAT'S RIGHT.
[ LAUGHTER .]
THAT'S RIGHT.
[ LAUGHTER .]
[ CHUCKLES .]
[ LAUGHTER .]
[ CHUCKLES .]
THEY'RE UNDER THE TABLE.
[ CHUCKLES .]
THEY'RE UNDER THE TABLE.
[ LAUGHS .]