Inside Men (2012) s01e01 Episode Script

Episode 1

'They tell you not to panic.
'They tell you to stay calm.
'Not resist.
'Not put up a fight.
'Don't engage them in conversation.
Don't speak unless spoken to.
'Be compliant '.
.
and you will live to see another day.
' Everything OK, boss? Everything's fine, Tom.
'The day you take this job they warn you it can happen.
'They warn you of the dangers '.
.
and they highlight your vulnerability.
'They prepare you.
'They tell you everything 'but when.
' Go.
Clear.
Move! Come on.
Hands up, hands up! Faster! Hurry up! Move! Move! Open it! Four numbers, hero.
Let's have them.
Everybody down! Over there! Move! Shut it! Get down! Kneel over there! I said, "Kneel over there!" Stay on the floor! Get down! I'm going to do your knees, and then your elbows.
Do it.
6 6 Let's try that again, shall we? 6-1-5-7.
6 6-1-5-7.
Pick him up then! Come on! '.
.
First steps to meet the rest' He'll do anything you tell him to.
They teach them that.
Now pick him up! Come on! The numbers! Where's your key? Get your key out! On three! One, two, three No, no, no, no! No, no, no, please! Move over there! Move over there! Stay down! Down, down, down! Stay down! Get down! Get down! Please, please! Move! Over there! Get down! Come on, come on! Come on, come on, come on! Right, you two, loading bay! Now! You two! Get the other one! Now! Move! Come on! Faster! We're going to do this! Come on! Move it! Faster! Faster! Come on! Move it! Come on! The cages! Help them! Come on! 'How well do you really know yourself? 'How far will you go? 'What sacrifices are you prepared to make? 'What exactly are you capable of?' Marcus You're late.
Providing you make it in before the boss, technically speaking you're still on time.
Better luck next time! Cheers.
Ah, thank you, Sandra.
Coffee? Um No.
I'm all right.
Thank you.
Any news yet? No.
No, nothing.
Nothing yet.
Fine.
Thanks, boss.
See you tomorrow.
Goodnight.
So, remind me you work as a site manager.
I do.
Er, Larson House.
And that's a security depot, is it? It is.
It's a counting house.
What do you count? Cash.
Sterling.
It, um, comes in and out all day, every day.
My job is to make sure it all tallies up.
Where does it come from? If I'm allowed to ask.
Banks, supermarkets.
Anyone that doesn't want to hold onto it.
Which is pretty much everyone.
It really isn't as exciting as it sounds.
John's been there six and a half years now, and he's never had any trouble.
Not even criminals want cash these days.
Online, that's where you'll find them.
Can I ask you a question? Of course you can.
How much longer do we have to wait? Because we're ready.
We are more than ready.
I know.
I made you tea.
Why didn't you wake me?! Er, yeah.
Morning.
I'm going to give you a chance.
I want you to put it back.
Put back what? The note.
The note I saw you take.
I did not take anything.
I saw you, Dita.
You are calling me a thief? I'm going to give you a chance.
I'll let it go if you just put it back.
But if you don't, I won't have any choice but to dismiss you.
You cannot fire me.
I can.
I can.
And I will.
No.
You will not.
Dita.
Dita! Di I can go from here.
Will drive me? No.
You can go.
No police? For 20 quid? Not really worth the admin, is it? How old are you? Do you know anyone? I mean anyone that can sort you out with some work? Look .
.
let me give you a number.
It's a guy called Henry, he knows a lot about the temping market round here.
So you mention my name, he'll probably help you.
What is your name? Chris.
Thank you.
Chris.
Hey, run that by me again.
They'll only go to 850, which leaves you to make up the deficit.
Tell them to piss off.
I'll sell to someone else.
You've overpaid.
No-one will take on this lease at that price.
So I do what? I lose 12 grand and have a useless empty shop? Or I lose three grand and not have a useless empty shop? It's a matter of cutting your losses, Mr Molesey.
Oh really? From where I'm standing it feels like pissing away three grand for nothing.
Did that guy come? Mum? That guy, did he turn up? What guy? You said someone was coming about the second meter.
They were going to combine the bills for you.
I didn't see anyone all week.
I'll chase 'em up.
Where's that girl? You don't bring her any more.
Yeah, well if you can stop drinking for a week, maybe I will.
She was nice.
Pretty thing.
How is she? John Coniston! Manager of the month! Come on up here, shy man.
Speech! Speech! 20 words.
That's all we want.
Come on.
Ah, well, thank you, thank you everyone.
Thank you very much.
I um, well, I'm lucky, I suppose.
I .
.
have some good staff and they, they don't make too many mistakes.
So I guess I'll be sharing this with them.
Thanks very much, thank you.
Bullshit you will! And now your least favourite part of the evening.
The prize for whatever one of you bastards lost the most money.
Paul! Cheers.
Looking good.
Well done, John boy.
Cheers.
Congratulations.
You OK? Yeah.
I can't sleep.
Let me see.
No, get out! No! Let me see! It's nothing.
What? Get off! Let me see! No.
It's a secret.
We don't have secrets.
Let me see! No! Get off! It's nothing.
Just something I'm working on.
Just an idea.
Are you going to make us rich again? Ah, don't Enter your PIN.
That's fine.
Thank you.
They'll be ready on Friday.
Hello.
Hi.
How you doing? Good.
Thank you.
Sorry? The job.
You helped me.
Thank you.
It was nothing.
Have a nice day.
Thank you.
See you tomorrow.
Yeah.
You should have let me pay.
Buy me a drink? Yeah, yeah, sure.
That is why you waited? I guess.
Oi! Oi! H!! How are you? All right, little bruv? Good.
real good.
Yeah, Tilly, you all right? Yeah.
All right, mate? Yeah.
It needs to breathe.
Hey babe, have you seen this? It's got a cork and everything.
You're about as funny as each other.
Got anything for me yet? What, the grass isn't enough? I need my money.
Yeah, well wheels are in motion.
What does that even mean? "Wheels are in motion"? Is that just more bullshit? I might have something of value.
Something I can trade.
What do you reckon to this? What is it? Well, to you and me it's pretty worthless, but someone might be willing to pay good money for that.
This is your place? The warehouse? Now, I don't know what something like that will fetch, but maybe you want to ask around? Just when I think you can't get any stupider.
You know some horrible wankers.
Don't pretend you don't.
Is this it? Your big plan for paying me back? You going to need something better, Marcus.
I'll pretend I never saw that.
Wh Morning.
Morning.
Nice weekend? Yes, thank you, Sandra.
Could I have a word, boss? You're, um .
.
you're already at the top of your pay band, Chris.
So that's it? This is the most I'll ever earn? For the job you do.
I could do more hours? The only way I could pay you more would be to promote you, and .
.
and that would mean creating a position.
And, um, well .
.
I don't even know if they'll let me.
Right.
But I'll ask.
All right? I promise to try.
Chris! Yeah? There's something in the bag for you.
Yeah.
Not a problem.
Piece of piss when you've got the tools.
Go on.
Where are you getting all this gear? That bird of yours? This is the last of it, mate, trust me.
Too bad.
I could get rid of it, if you wanted me to.
For a cut.
Nice bit of pocket money.
How much can she get hold of? They're here.
Who should answer the door? Me or you? You go.
You go.
I might scare her.
Aww, this is a lovely one.
Does he have a name? Perhaps we can give him one.
Shall I put him on the wall? What else we got? Why aren't you at work? They were unkind to me.
You quit? No.
The other one.
'That's a pisser.
' She'll get something else.
When was the last time our place got hit? Not since I've worked there.
Exactly.
I've been there five and a half years.
No-one's even attempted it.
Apparently someone had a go a year or two before I started, but they didn't even make it through the barrier.
No one nicks that much cash any more.
The only way to get it out is little and often.
It's not doable.
You reckon? This is just hypothetical, right? Two blokes in a pub having a chat.
I reckon I could get a couple of grand a week out of that place, and no-one would know.
How? Right, just suppose we get two deliveries in close together.
I can't get the first one inside until I sign off the second, which means I've got two loads in transit.
I'm already having to do this two or three times a week.
It'd be easy for a case to go missing en route.
All we need is someone who doesn't know what they're doing - someone new - logging these deliveries on the other side.
We approach one of the Polish temps.
They pass through that place all the time.
No one explains nothing to them.
They're always screwing something up.
All they have to do is sign for the top job and ignore the bottom one.
They all see one cage, they assume it's one job.
Not my fault, not their fault.
Can't even blame the poor Polack.
No-one explained it properly.
Suddenly they realise there's one pile of cash between two deliveries, and the numbers don't add up.
They're a case light.
It's a mess.
They can't go back to the client, cos they can't prove who screwed up.
So they do the only thing they can do.
Absorb the loss, and keep it as quiet as possible.
And the missing case? Wherever we want it to be.
We move it around.
Keep it hidden.
Still one big problem.
How do you get it out? I guess that's where someone like you becomes useful.
The way I see it, walking around with 50-odd grand is suicide.
I'd spunk the lot in a week - wouldn't be able to help myself.
What we want to do is make small, regular withdrawals.
Thanks.
Because a lot of little things eventually adds up to one very big thing.
I've been over this hundreds of times and it's doable.
Providing we don't get greedy.
We know we can trust each other, don't we? Don't we? Yeah.
Yeah, course.
I don't want to do this any more than you do.
Believe me.
But I'm running out of options.
And you, well, I think you could do with a fresh start, don't you? You and the girl? How much could we get out? In total? Between us? 50-odd grand.
We chuck five to the Polack, leaves us with 22 grand each.
Goes a long, long way, does 22 grand.
You getting on? Cheers.
'Hello?' Gordon, it's John.
'How are you?' Sorry.
I know it's late.
Um we've had a small problem.
We look like we're going to be 50 down.
'What? You're kidding?' Well, uh, 51,250, to be, to be more exact.
What are you going to do about it? We will get it back.
You have my word.
We will, we will get it back.
It 'Do it, John.
It's not good.
' You like it? I love it.
We'll take it.
In black.
Er, brown.
What's in the box? What box? Oh, you mean this box? Yes.
I mean that box.
This is the brand new thing that we absolutely need.
What does it do? Everything.
And it saves us time.
How much did it cost? Not as much as you probably think it would.
Ta-da! I have no idea what that is.
It fries perfect chips and uses only a spoonful of oil.
I got a little extra in my pay this month.
A clerical balls-up.
Enjoy it.
It's free.
And now, ladies and gentlemen, Rebecca Layton.
Thank you.
Come on up here.
This month's winner.
Well done.
There we go.
Congratulations.
Well, er .
.
finally I get my hands on one of these! And not before time, eh? Yes! Not a good month, John.
A one-off, Gordon.
It won't happen again.
When I find out who's responsible, I'll You'll what? I'll fucking kill them.
Yeah, John.
Course you will.
I'll be over your way at the end of the week.
Let's see what you can do about it by then.
Cheers, Tariq.
Yes, thank you.
Good night.
Rebecca, gorgeous.
Shhh! How did it go? My hero.
Want a lift? Bus goes straight past my flat.
Well, I need a new route home.
Not supposed to take the same roads every day.
What's that, a security thing? Yeah.
If I drop you off, I'll have to take a new route.
You'll be doing me a favour.
So, I've got some great news.
I got clearance for the post.
What's that? The head of security job.
They're going to let me create it.
Pay band G.
Ah, that's great! Yeah.
Still got to formally advertise it, You know, um, interview.
Make it seem fair.
But it's, um, it's a formality.
Job's yours.
Thank you.
Well, I said I would.
So you always do what you promise? That's a rare quality, isn't it? Is it? Well, I try.
In my experience, people generally bullshit you.
Anywhere up here will do.
Thanks for the lift.
Thanks for the new route.
Yeah, just sign it there, please.
Just here? 'Hello?' Gordon, i-it's John.
'Well, boy?' How are you, buddy? 'Yeah' Yeah, yep.
Yeah.
I won't keep you.
It's just to say I found it.
'What?' The 51,000.
Oh, right, right.
And where was it? It was down the back of the sofa, like usual.
Clerical error.
Yeah.
Yeah.
It was here all the time.
'Good.
Got to get on.
' All right, all right, buddy.
'Well done.
' Yeah.
Talk soon.
'Right.
' Bye.
Come in.
Does this mean I have to put in an application? Shut the door, Chris.
Sit down.
What happens now? Well, I suppose I should interview you.
I thought you said it was a formality.
That was before.
Before what? Before Before I stopped trusting you.
Have I done something wrong? So, er, where's the money, Chris? What money, boss? The money you took.
The 51,000.
Is this a part of the interview? Like, a test? I mean, what were you going to buy? A couple of nice cars? No, that would be too obvious, wouldn't it? No, er, pay off some debts? Why don't you just shove the job up your arse, boss? If you'd put a gun to my head and taken it I'd be compensated, you know that? Yeah, time off with a generous bonus.
Thank you very much.
But the way you've done it - however you've done it - I'm the one that loses everything.
If you know so much, why don't you call the police? I don't need to.
I can handle this myself.
Cheers, mate.
Next.
Anywhere but the balls.
Heard a rumour you were gay.
Funny.
You feel up men for a living.
I tell you what, if it means that much, go on - give them a good squeeze, check they're ripe enough.
Go on.
Next.
Can I have a word, Marcus? This going to take long, boss? We're just waiting for someone.
Why, are you in a hurry? Supposed to be meeting the missus after work.
Why don't you call her? Tell her you're going to be late.
How late, exactly? You bastard Hey, hey! Enough! Enough! Sit down.
Key.
Twat.
We're not getting nicked for it.
That's what he promised, is it? You're more stupid than you look.
He's letting us put it back.
What? I just want to know how you did it.
Easier than you think.
We had a good plan.
Not good enough.
We only took a couple of grand.
You can see for yourself.
So you'll put that back? Of course.
Yeah, somehow.
I mean, all that risk .
.
for this.
If you're going to do it, if you're going to cross that line, it has to be worth it.
Doesn't it? We can get more.
Between the three of us, it's easy.
Shut up! What? Look at him.
He's human.
He's tempted.
You're right, Marcus.
You're right, I am.
But not for this.
What, then? You tell us how much.
What if we took the lot? No! Oh! Aargh! Oh, God.
We're full! Let's go! Come on! Arms in the air! Arms in the air! Move! Keep going! Shut it! Keep going! Get down there! Out! Out! Get out! Get in or I'll shoot you! Go! Go, go! Move! Keep your hands on your head! Hands on your head! OK, we're just going in here for a minute, all right? It's OK.
Don't worry.
Sorry.
Ugh.
Aargh! We're done.
Come on, let's go! Let's go! 'Early indications suggest the biggest cash robbery in UK history.
' We can just go.
Me and you, take off.
We have a plan and we're sticking to it.
Promise you.
Promise you it's all over.
Something went wrong.
Chris.
He was hurt.
Is that going to be a problem? 'Only if he lives.
'
Next Episode