JAG s09e18 Episode Script

What If ...

If you will all raise your glasses.
I present to you Petty Officer First Class Jennifer Coates.
Your promotion will be effective May 1.
Congratulations.
Hear, hear! Hear, hear! Congratulations.
Thank you.
Mmm, Mmm.
Cookies.
Perhaps we should go by Admiral? Uh, no.
Fortune cookies aren't my thing.
I think we should go alphabetically.
Well, that would make you last "T" for Turner.
I say we go by height.
Excellent idea.
Commander, pick your future.
Mmm You've got to read it, sir.
Out loud.
That's the rules.
Tell us what it says.
I don't really believe in these things.
I think you won't reveal your fortune because you do believe.
Excuse me, Commander? Your wife is here.
Well, this is a surprise.
No uniform? I'm T.
A.
D.
to JAG for transition briefings at the Navy Annex.
Stopped by to have the admiral sign off on my terminal leave.
You're leaving the service? As of tomorrow.
That's why I need you to sign our divorce papers Today.
I'll sign the divorce papers.
You've been sitting on them for a month.
What is the big hurry? Well, it would be nice to get a divorce before I get married again.
You're getting married again? When? This weekend.
John planned a romantic trip by train to Colorado.
He found a wedding chapel overlooking the Rockies.
Who is John? When did all this happen? What is going on in your life, Mac? If you had ever listened to me when we were married, you'd know the answer to that.
I don't want to be here five years from now alone, childless and still fighting with you.
Why did we ever think it would work? Because four years ago, in Sydney Harbor, we realized we loved each other.
Love isn't enough, Harm.
Well, I hear it's a good prerequisite for marriage.
Well, so is consideration, time spent together and a million other things.
Our marriage always came last.
Sir? The admiral's requested you.
You wanted to see me, Admiral? I assume you've read the case file on Marine Colonel Sutter.
What's your take? He fired two rounds, inches from an Iraqi detainee's head in order to coerce information from him.
It's a clear violation.
But Well, he did extract critical Intel that saved American lives, ma'am.
It doesn't change the law.
It's going to Article 32, and I want you to prosecute.
Aye, aye, ma'am.
Ma'am, Colonel Sutter is a headstrong, highly decorated war hero who marches to the beat of his own drummer.
It's going to take a firm hand from defense counsel.
Give me a name.
Colonel MacKenzie is at JAG, T.
A.
D.
What do you think about assigning her the case? Excuse the interruption, Admiral.
About my terminal leave request? The commander and I were just discussing that.
Change of plans.
You'll be defending Colonel Sutter.
I appreciate the vote of confidence in my abilities, but I'll be on terminal leave, as of tomorrow.
I haven't signed your paperwork yet, Colonel.
I realize that, Admiral.
One st assignment.
It's only an Article 32.
Your leave will be delayed by a day or two at most.
Dismissed.
Aye, aye, ma'am.
I hope you know what you're doing.
Oh, I think so.
Be careful what you wish for.
It's simple, Colonel.
I interrogated an Iraqi detainee who had Intel on a planned ambush of U.
S.
Marines my men.
He gave up time and place, surrendered his cohorts.
There was no attack, nor, after that, any enemy activity in my sector.
End of story.
You personally escorted the detainee outside the tent, and fired two shots next to his head.
It seemed to clear his mind.
Threats and intimidation no matter what the result Are violations of the rules of interrogation.
You know who reported me? A female judge advocate who'd spent ten hours questioning the detainee, getting nowhere.
I don't see the relevance, sir.
"Phony Marines," Colonel.
That's the relevance.
Women who've never seen combat can't possibly understand what's at stake.
You don't like what you hear? Well, speaking as a "phony Marine," sir, I know what's at stake now.
You're charged with aggravated assault and communicating a threat.
You're facing dismissal and prison time.
Now, as I see it, your character is the key to this defense.
So, you tell me if you like what you hear, sir.
I can see from the look on your face, Commander.
You're wondering why I went along with assigning Colonel MacKenzie to the case.
You figure I've gone soft.
There's not an ounce of fat on you, Krennick.
Admiral.
The way I see it, you need to get her out of your system so you can move on.
Find a wan that's right for you.
You never give up, do you? You need a woman that's tough, ambitious Ruthless? That, too.
Someone who can give you the ride of your life.
In case you forgot, I've pulled nine-and- a-half G's in a Tomcat.
Oh.
Well, then maybe you're finally ready for me.
Oh, here.
I had this in my trunk.
Settlement of our house and assets was the easy part.
Still have to divvy up the memories.
Just a few items got mixed in when I packed up to leave.
I wondered where this was.
I remember when you separated it from my Corvette.
As I recall, a tire iron was involved.
Ah, and I recall a promise to trade in the 'Vette for something practical.
"Time to put away childish things," you said.
And then you returned from the dealership with new racing wheels.
Ah, the good old days when we would break up to make up.
I don't want to have to break up with someone just to get them to pay attention to me.
Oh, and if you think arranging this little courtroom drama is going to bring us back together, Rabb, you're out of your mind.
You misjudge me, Mrs.
Rabb.
Colonel Sutter deserves the best legal counsel out there.
That happens to be you.
Oh, I smell a rat.
I shouldn't say this, but as prosecutor, I support Colonel Sutter's actions.
I'm in a mood to deal.
Farrow? Yeah, it's been a while.
Last time I saw you, my neck was on the chopping block.
Along with Sarah's.
Why are you here, Colonel? Oh, it's "John" now.
I took my 20 years retirement from the Corps, and I've started a new life.
And the next chapter is about to begin.
"John.
" You're John.
Well, I guess congratulations are in order.
Well, thank you very much.
So, did you forget about lunch today? I waited at the restaurant for about an hour.
Called your cell phone, no answer.
I'm so sorry.
I had a meeting with a client.
I thought you were dropping by the office to get your terminal leave papers signed.
The admiral assigned me to a new case.
Kind of a last minute thing.
How'd that come up? Don't ask.
Is it going to delay our trip? Commander Rabb assures me that we'll be able to come to a quick resolution.
Oh, so, you're representing the other side? Just like old times.
Only this time, the arguments stay in the courtroom.
I have an idea.
You two missed lunch, so did I.
Let's grab a bite together.
We'll pass.
We could discuss the case.
Might get you on that train sooner, Sarah.
So how did you two rediscover each other, anyway? Well, a few months ago, John was on the East Coast doing business, and he looked me up.
A few quick months, and now you're getting married? Oh, you forget, Sarah and I were acquainted before.
Oh.
Didn't it come up at your court-martial? A little fraternization back there in Okinawa, when you were her commanding officer? Not that I can blame you.
So, what have you been up to anyway, recently, John? I mean, other than marrying my wife? Ex-wife.
I conduct guided river-rafting tours in Colorado.
Colorado? Yeah, it's the state right next to Utah? He's building us a cabin in the woods.
You sure you know what you're getting yourself into? And out of.
All alone up there in the woods.
Does it ever bother you she shot her first husband? Bother you? Well, let's just say I never kept a loaded weapon around the house.
Can we move on? Thank you.
So, you're getting married this weekend, huh? Where exactly is this happening? You're not invited.
We're taking the Zephyr out of Chicago.
It's one of the last great rail journeys in the United States.
Straight through the Rockies.
And it stops in this little town called Unity.
It's where John's grandparents got married.
It's where we're going to tie the knot.
So, about this, uh Sutter case.
Yeah, you said you're willing to deal.
To a point.
Given the severity of the man's offense.
Alleged offense.
Well, taking into account his character and his unblemished record, the government would be willing to accept dismissal without confinement.
He's eligible for retirement.
If he accepts that deal, he loses his pension and his benefits.
If he goes to court, he's looking at eight years in Leavenworth.
You never change, do you? This is your idea of a deal? She's a tough one, John.
But I guess you know that, don't you? Oh, she can be tough when she needs to be.
Like when she's defending a man who deserves a commendation, not a court-martial.
Not according to the law.
I'm not a lawyer, Commander.
I just know what's right.
Look, Harm, John and I are going to be on that train tomorrow, so give me something I can work with.
Fine.
The man is a decorated war hero, after all, and he only made a mistake.
And we can all make mistakes, right? You're living proof of that.
I'm willing to offer broken sword early out.
Terms? Nonjudicial punishment.
The colonel retires immediately and receives full benefits.
Sounds like a sell-out to this old Marine.
Well, age does afford perspective, doesn't it, John.
You're damn right.
Well, quitting is still quitting, Harm.
Yes, it is, isn't it? Some people do throw in the towel when the going gets rough.
I'll talk to the colonel.
If he agrees, we agree.
You set me up.
What?! Colonel Sutter rejected the dea It seems his division commander made a similar offer a week ago and he turned it down then.
You knew he'd want to go to court.
Don't you miss this? What I'll miss is my train.
The honeymoon express? You lying lowlife.
Hey, you started this.
You didn't have to waltz through JAG.
You could've had the admiral fax you your leave papers.
I'm going to kick your butt.
I'll look forward to it.
Well, if we're going bheight, Admiral, you're the next victim.
Looking at Bud, I don't think he can hold off much longer.
Go ahead.
Thank you, sir.
Only if Harriet opens hers first.
Our fortunes have been intertwined.
In sickness and in health.
Come on, you got to read them out loud.
"Your unspoken desire is the road not taken.
Take it.
" It's a match.
What are the chances, huh? Pretty good, sir.
Fate has already thrown them together.
So funny, huh? Still with us, Commander? Yes, sir.
I was, uh, I was just thinking.
Oh, that one goes in the master bedroom walk-in closet, please.
Yes, ma'am.
Sadie, I have to run an errand.
I'll be back in about an hour.
Yes, ma'am.
Thank you.
Bud? Harriet? How are you? I'm good.
Rich.
Rich? My parents died in a boating accident in July.
I'm sorry.
Left me all the money I could ever need.
But that doesn't buy me an emergency bathroom remodel.
So, that's why you're here is plumbing? My contractor left me high and dry and I need a spa installation by Friday for my housewarming party.
I thought you moved to Florida.
I did.
I moved back.
By Friday? No problem.
Harriet! Mikey.
Hi.
Wow, last time I saw you was, uh, was the day you dumped Bud at the altar.
That was in the past, Mikey.
You were just talking about it yesterday.
Anyway, about the bathroom Major Clayton, you were the Judge Advocate assigned to Colonel Sutter's unit.
You fielded the original complaint from the detainee regarding the Colonel's actions.
Correct.
The detainee reported that Colonel Sutter twice fired a pistol within six inches of his ear, for the purpose of extracting information.
Do the rules of engagement prohibit abusing prisoners? Yes, they do.
What is your opinion of Colonel Sutter? Objection.
Counsel seems to be having trouble sticking to the rules, himself.
Rules of evidence don't permit opinion.
Goes to establishing a pattern of behavior, Your Honor.
Counsel can appreciate that.
I'll allow it.
The witness will answer the question.
He's a cowboy, sir.
He believes the ends justify the means.
No further questions.
Your witness, Colonel.
Major, do our enemies in Iraq comply with the rules of war? The enemy there is fighting an irregular war, ma'am, but the Iraqi Fedayeen are not on trial here.
They damn well should be.
Colonel, another outburst, I'll hold you in contempt.
Did Colonel Sutter's actions save the lives of American personnel? Fortunately.
Nevertheless, rules exist for a reason.
So, in your opinion, rules and regulations are more important than American lives.
I have nothing further, Your Honor.
Whatever happened to the Navy, Bud, and your dream of becoming a lawyer? Well, I kind of lost interest in it right after you lost interest in me.
That's not what happened, Bud.
Well, then, why didn't you want to marry me? And don't tell me it was because I got beat up by a pregnant stripper at my bachelor party.
No, at the time, I didn't think you were mature enough.
Now, I don't think the problem was you.
It was me.
That was some pretty sharp legal maneuvering today in the courtroom.
Thanks.
You want this clock? You bought it.
It's a memento from our honeymoon.
Do you want to know what I remember from our honeymoon? It rained, and you made zillion cell phone calls.
I was working on a big case.
My case at least it was, until I married you, got shipped out of JAG, and Admiral Chegwidden reassigned it.
Remember our first Christmas together? The tree was right there.
Mostly what I remember is me hauling out a dried twig on Valentine's Day.
Were you always this bitter? Loving you was like stepping on a Rusty nail.
You want the bed? I don't need it.
John's building me a cherry four-poster with a silk canopy.
How quaint.
Nothing wrong with a canopy.
Oh, yeah, it's nice protection for when the roof leaks.
Nothing John does leaks.
I could sell tickets to this museum of adolescence.
I thought you might like to have this.
Oh, I don't need it.
I have my memories.
Yeah, well, I have mine, too.
I hope you're not going to give me your ring back.
How long did you wear yours? A while.
It was like a string around my finger, reminding me not to look back.
Hey, we had good times, Mac.
Do you believe in fate, kismet, destiny? No.
Here with you, today, I keep thinking, what if I told you we were meant to be together? I'd tell you you were crazy.
Look, I know things didn't quite work out You have a gift for understatement.
But what if we were meant to be together and we just got in our own way? "What if" just doesn't get it done.
I guess I just kept thinking there was time.
Love can't wait.
And neither can the Judge.
We're due back in court in 20 minutes.
d What if I'd said "I will" instead of "I won't"? d d What if I'd said "I do" instead of "I don't"? d d If I did it again maybe I'd come home to you d d Not a cold empty bed.
d That was amazing.
Thank you, Ms.
Sims.
Mr.
Turner, Varese tells me you and I have something in common.
I once worked for JAG, too, although it seems like a lifetime ago.
Well, I'm a recent dropout.
You and I have business to talk about.
I have the agreement terms in my case.
Excuse me a second.
My bathroom guy's here.
You sounded great.
Thank you.
Now we're leaving for Paris tomorrow night, right? Oh, yes.
Don't you worry.
The honeymoon is so on schedule.
Oh, I can't wait.
Marta, that box of photographs goes out in the garage.
Yes, ma'am.
Thanks.
That's Horst Fisher! That German soccer player! You a soccer fan, Harriet? Nah, he was a suitor.
They were all suitors.
Race car drivers, polo players, a jai-alai champion.
I got really popular when I got really, really rich.
"Broke"? Brague.
And it belongs in a museum.
I'm leaving it to the Modern in my will.
It's called "Girl With a Guitar.
" She looks more like road kill, to me.
$2 million worth of road kill, Mikey, but who's keeping track? General Montrose, as Colonel Sutter's battalion commander, do you believe his actions violated the Geneva Conventions? Technically, yes.
Yes or no, sir? Yes.
Thank you.
Your witness.
General, isn't it true you waited until a Judge Advocate under your command filed a complaint, and only then informed the chain of command of what had occurred? That's one way to look at it.
Do you believe Colonel Sutter should be punished? I think he should be given a damn medal.
War is hell.
You can't play by the rules when your enemy is duplicitous and underhanded.
I'll say.
Objection! Counsel's testifying, Your Honor.
That was under my breath, and besides, I object, Your Honor.
Counsel is badgering me.
Counselor, you're flirting with contempt.
I am not flirting.
Believe me.
No further questions.
Redirect, Your Honor.
Colonel Sutter's actions, sir, are in clear violation of the UCMJ.
Do you not believe that he should be held responsible for those actions that, indeed, all who wear the uniform should be? Yes.
Opposing counsel is attempting to muddy the waters by spreading the blame.
She's blaming Major Clayton, she's blaming you.
But the point is she, too, should be held responsible for her own actions.
Your Honor, where is counsel going with this? Might be interesting to find out.
My point is that we can blame others for our predicaments, but the truth is we make our own bed.
Objection, Your Honor he didn't make the bed in two years.
Let's try to stay on the subject, Counselor.
If you had convinced your client to take the original deal, you'd be on the Zephyr already.
Unless, of course, you don't want to be.
Objection! That was under my breath, Your Honor.
I've lost the unraveling thread of the argument here, Counselors.
I'm calling for a recess.
The Government rests, Your Honor.
I believe my case has been made.
General, you may step down.
Well, that went well.
I think it's your turn, sir.
Go ahead, Colonel.
Dodging fate? No, just stale cookies.
I'll do it if you do it, sir.
It's just for fun.
"Your unspoken desire is the road not taken.
" Same fortune? At least they're consistent at this joint.
You didn't have the Kung Pao Chicken.
I told you this thing is dumb.
I don't know, sir.
Haven't you ever wondered about the road not taken? You have, haven't you, sir? Wow! You make one wrong turn at Lake Erie and.
You end up in paradise! Hey, folks, it's me, Bud Roberts, owner of Bud's Hot Tubs, and have I got something for you.
A.
J.
! Come quick, you've got to see this.
Quick, before it's gone.
New Blue Grotto 9,000 Isn't that the young man from your JAG command that we had over for dinner? That won't drown your bank account.
In the flesh.
I warned Roberts when he left the Navy it was a big mistake.
And I mean anybody, or I'm a monkey's Uncle.
( gorilla hooting á I swear, we're not related.
Here, A.
J.
, make time for the muffin.
I'm already late.
for no money down, so stop on by, I'll make you a spa-rific deal.
Chegwidden.
When things get hot, Bud gets in the tub.
Well how the hell did you lose her, Wong? No, I don't want to hr excuses.
You put every available man on it.
You can start by finding that middleman of hers, Stan Rockman.
My defendant skipped bail.
A.
J.
, you're a lawyer, not a bounty hunter.
When you retired from the Navy, I thought you were going to ease up a bit.
What, this? This is your big case? She is such a sweet-looking girl.
Hardly.
Back under my watch, a couple Christmases ago, Petty Officer Jennifer Coates went UA from the Navy.
Now she's part of an art theft ring.
They take orders from wealthy collectors in Asia and fill them by stealing from museums and private collectors.
AKA "The Catwoman.
" That's what the press is calling her.
Pretty damn silly.
Do you think she's still in the area? I know she is.
She's after a rare Shakespeare folio for a client in Singapore.
Shakespeare? Oh, A.
J.
, it sounds like you could use my help.
No.
"Ms.
H.
Sims of 29 Ayrdale Drive, purchased at auction.
"Bears the armorial bookplate of the third Earl of Palliser, who was afterwards the Duke of Omnium.
" He acquired the book circa 1868.
The name Palliser is inscribed across the top of the opening of "The Merry Wives of Windsor.
" How much do you think we can get, Stan? I got some buyers in Japan willing to pay three mil.
You know, it's a status thing.
It's like paying five large for a bottle of Romanae Conti.
So, uh, this Sims mansion, it's got security, right? Oh, yes.
Motion sensors, state-of- the-art alarm system.
And you know this how? I was casing the joint yesterday, as a cook's assistant.
I got a job with the caterer Harriet Sims hired for her big party on Friday.
I'll be passing canapés all night long.
Mai-tai.
Let me have a Martini.
So, is there anything else there worth boosting? A couple of Renoir pastels.
Very nice.
A Brague oil, "Girl with a Guitar.
" After we lift the folio, we can pay the Heiress Sims a second visit.
Excellent.
What's my cut in all this? I take all the risks.
And I move all the merchandise.
Without me, sweetheart, you're nothing.
Isn't it about time you introduced me to your contacts? Oh, come on, Jen.
Geez, you just jumped bail.
I mean, I shouldn't even be seen with you.
Stan, you don't know this yet, but I'm your future.
Captain Rogers, you served under Colonel Sutter for ten months.
In your estimation, is he a man of good character? I've never known a finer leader, ma'am.
Thank you.
No further questions.
Good character is often used to excuse conduct unbecoming, is it not, Captain? Objection, counsel is testifying.
I'll rephrase, Your Honor.
A person of fine character is capable of unethical and ill-advised behavior, do you agree? I suppose it's possible, Commander.
When men of good character act poorly, they should be held accountable for their actions, correct? Yes, sir.
And they should be aware of how those actions, no matter how well intended, affect those around them, and they should never be too proud to admit when they've overstepped and been wrong.
Uh, I agree with that statement, sir.
Do you? Asked and answered.
Thank you, Captain.
Nothing further.
Bud, I just want to thank you so much for everything.
The bathroom looks great.
Let's talk about the bill.
No charge.
Don't be silly, Bud.
You and Mikey worked hard.
Name your figure.
I can afford it.
How 'bout a million bucks? Oh okay.
I'll just write a check.
Address is on the invoice.
Mail at your convenience.
Bud, can I confess something to you? I have all the money in the world, and it still feels like something's missing.
Like everything's missing.
What about you? I'm still the same man, Harriet.
I watch Star Trek reruns every Saturday night.
All those half-naked girls in your hot tub commercials.
You never Found anyone? No.
At least you don't have a carton full of bad memories.
Oh, I didn't say that.
Why don't you and Mikey come to the party? You never know what fate has in store.
You might find the girl of your dreams.
Maybe I already have? Taking a trip down memory lane? Every now and then, I find myself thinking that you're not the worst thing that ever happened to me.
Mind if I get personal? Yes, but I doubt it'll stop you.
I meant what I said this morning in the courtroom.
I'll never understand why it's so hard for you to be nice.
Look, you have to do what you feel is right.
And if that means living in a frigid cabin in the wilds of Colorado, so be it.
I like you when you're like this.
You married the wrong guy once, Mac.
Just be sure you're not making the same mistake again.
I'm sorry I'm late Well, I'll, uh I'll knock next time.
No.
There won't be a next time.
The commander was just apologizing for his many deficiencies and wishing us a happy life together.
See you in court.
Oh.
Everything working out between you and the colonel? It's an ongoing process.
I assume you're talking about the Article 32, Admiral.
Isn't that what we were talking about, Commander? You told me it was finished between you and Rabb.
It is.
That's not what I just saw.
Well, look again.
Imagine my surprise to discover the purchaser of this folio is an acquaintance of my husband.
How is the admiral? Preoccupied, grumpy, never home for dinner.
Good to see some things never change.
Hmm.
I'm so grateful to have a chance to see this folio for my research.
Yeah, it's just too bad someone wrote all over it.
No, not really.
You see, that's what separates one folio from another.
The marginalia gives us an idea as to the reading habits of each of its owners.
One of its readers Probably the Lady Glencora writes that Hamlet reminds her of her husband, Plantagenet.
"Always dithering.
" It places the book in its social context.
You're very lucky to have this.
Well, to be honest, I bought this on the advice of my financial planner.
It's safer than stocks.
Don't forget to invite the admiral to my housewarming, okay? Okay, I-I'll make sure that we attend.
Meanwhile, will you make sure that you really do keep this folio safe? Not to worry.
Anyone tries to budge this bad boy In for a rude surprise.
That is, if they make it this far.
The motion detector, up there, will go off if anything larger than a housefly buzzes this display case.
The folio is safe.
Colonel Sutter, is it true that, during the first Gulf War, as a major, you commandeered an Iraqi tank and used it to draw out the enemy? I did.
It proved quite effective.
Though a violation of orders, Colonel.
Affirmative.
And prior to that, during the Panama Incursion, you were you in similar violation when you appropriated a pair of night vision goggles fr an Army base Objection, Your Honor.
I don't see the point of this litany.
The point is, your client has established a pattern of making the same mistakes over and over.
But you should understand that.
Ah, so this is about me now.
Well, I'm not the one running away.
Do you ever think before you speak? I'd like to see counsel at the bench for a sidebar.
What is going on here? If he's trying to say that people don't change, he's right.
He is still the same underhanded, deceptive jerk he always was.
Still speaking through intermediaries, Mac? Have you two considered counseling? Total bust.
Our marriage counselor quit.
I want you two to find a way to solve your problems, so we can continue on with these proceedings.
We have been trying to solve them for two years, Your Honor.
Maybe it's time to move on.
Oh, I think these issues can be resolved.
I don't.
Just when you open up, just when I think that maybe we have a shot, you find a way to screw things up.
And I'm tired of this dance.
We apologize, Your Honor.
There will be no more bickering.
This is the end.
The defense rests.
This hearing will stand in recess until 0900 tomorrow.
Colonel, you may step down.
Your turn, Commander.
No, I-I can't.
I can only eat soy cookies.
I'm allergic.
Oh, talk about a rough childhood, sir.
Colonel, you haven't cracked a cookie yet.
That's right, Mac.
What does it say? Nothing.
It's silly.
Well, your face says something different.
Fine, I'll read it.
It says, "Wherever you go, there you are.
" The accused will rise.
Colonel Sutter, I've heard many things in this court that have greatly troubled me.
Lucky for you, none of them have anything to do with this case.
Counselors, were it not that I found your marital squabblings exceedingly entertaining, I would consider disciplinary action.
Colonel, I've determined that, though a violation did occur, circumstances mitigate against recommending this matter to court-martial.
My recommendation is for administrative action only.
This hearing is adjourned.
I got us on the afternoon train.
Whoa, whoa! I thought you were going to Harriet's this afternoon for the housewarming party.
Already sent my regrets.
Oh.
That's a shame.
You're moving all the way across country and you're never going to see those good folks again.
You know, the commander has a point, Sarah.
You don't want to leave any unfinished business.
It's settled then.
They're smokin' today.
They're not the only ones.
Really? I thought I was a little off for the first set.
No.
Couldn't have been better.
Harriet, hi.
Hi.
How are you? This is my fiancé, John Farrow.
Oh! So nice to meet you.
Nice to meet you.
I've heard so much about you.
Oh, well, likewise.
Wonderful place you have.
Not ready to throw in the towel yet? Why should I? Because you're in the 13th round of a 12-round fight.
You think you still got a shot? She came to the party, didn't she? I didn't Twist her arm much.
Admiral, since you've delighted in giving me enough rope to hang myself, what do you say you cut me just a little more slack? What's in it for me? Rebound potential.
Excuse me, I don't mean to bother you, but I have a small plumbing problem.
Could I see you for just a second? Sure.
Let's go take a look.
We'll be right back.
All right.
Hors d'oeuvre? Yeah, sure.
You know, you surprise me.
I can't believe Harriet would hire a felon.
'Cause you stole my heart from clear across the room.
Wong, we don't find this girl, we don't have a case.
Is that clear? She's here, A.
J.
Uh Who? Your elusive cat.
I saw her.
Your imagination's getting the best of you again.
Remember when you thought the hey Crossing guard was a hit woman? There.
That is not my imagination.
Meredith, please.
Aha! Oh, I'm I'm sorry.
I'm so sorry.
Honey.
Colonel Farrow.
I don't believe you've met Admiral Krennick.
Your reputation precedes you, Colonel Farrow.
Terminal leave, Mac.
Signed, sealed and delivered.
Thank you, Admiral.
I believe this merits a toast.
If the gentlemen will be so kind? You've got two very good men there.
Hate to choose.
And love to have the chance.
I made my choice.
Are you sure about that? If you keep chasing your past, your future's going to walk right out the door.
It's Jen.
I'm in.
Give me five.
On my way.
It's me.
Rock and roll.
I don't understand, A.
J.
You know, I know I do stupid things sometimes.
I'm afraid that, one day, I'm going do something so stupid you're going to stop loving me.
That's ridiculous.
That'll never happen.
You believe in fate? I'm a rationalist, A.
J.
Well, I do.
I believe if people are meant to be together, they will be, no matter what the obstacles.
If we were on opposite sides of the world, we would find a way to be with each other.
You think? Yes.
One last turn.
There you go.
Thank you.
Sucks not having a man in my life.
Bud, does it bother you that I have a lot more money than you do? I hate to break it to you, Harriet, but I-I probably have more money than you do.
Call it a fluke, or good fortune, but I am the Spa King.
I have 17 outlets in five States.
And I hold the patent on the Miracle Tickler.
It's a special little jet that produces a Tickling effect? d What if I could try again? d d If all of my "noes" had been "yeses" d d Where would my path have lead? d d I confess that unless I miss my guess d d I'd be someplace else instead d Come on! I'm coming, I'm coming! I got little legs and they don't go that fast.
Is that it? No, it's Poor Richard's Almanac.
Oh, cute.
Real cute.
Come on.
Hurry up.
Relax.
d Oh, was it you that I fooled, or me? d d What if I'd let you under my skin? d d It's so easy to end what's so hard to begin d d Don't mind me if I nurse my illusions d Going away present.
Our divorce papers.
You can file them with your terminal leave papers, your retirement orders, and every other burned bridge from your past, unhappy life.
You just won't give up.
Hey, I'm not the one giving up, Mac, you are.
Oh, I'm moving on.
Escaping.
Admit it.
Throwing away your career, running off to the woods with Farrow.
It's just not you.
In your opinion.
Hey, you can't deny who you are, Mac.
You can't deny us.
There is no us, Harm.
And what you're doing right now, this is exactly you.
Not committing until I've got one foot out the door.
Even your pal Krennick thinks it's time for me to walk out of here with Farrow.
They make a lovely couple.
Of course, looks can be deceiving.
They were married for two years.
Oh, I wouldn't worry about it.
The commander's blown his last chance, and he knows it.
Well, the man has a strange way of accepting defeat.
Oh, it's just pride.
Surely an old Marine can understand that.
So, you've won, Colonel.
It's time to claim your spoils while you still can.
Women don't like to be tested.
We're leaving.
Our train doesn't leave Now, John! If that's what you want.
d Cold, empty bed d d They say hindsight is 20-20 d d We're so clever at reinventing the past d d Now, when I lie awake d Congratulations.
d And relive each mistake d d I see how good I was d You let her go, you're making a mistake.
The rest of your life you'll wonder, "What if?" d If I'd stayed around, 'stead of leaving d d Would you have stuck with me? d Destiny has spoken, my friend.
My dad says destiny speaks through the choices we make.
d I didn't see what we could be d d What if I'd let you in just to see what's what? d d What if I thought of "Why" instead of "Why not"? d You really think you saw her? Here you go, sir.
Thank you.
That white jacket at the end, that belongs to my wife.
Well, she used to be my wife.
She is, in fact.
Thank you.
Yes, sir.
d It's so easy to end what's so hard to begin d d Don't mind me if I nurse my illusions d Destiny.
Huh.
I don't get what people see in these old scribbles.
I know.
Nice.
Hold it right there.
Oh, hold it, my ass.
I wouldn't do that.
I'm a member of the Falls Church Ladies Rotarian Pistol Club.
Why do I think that club's not accredited? Try me.
Oh, who cares? It's not loaded, anyway.
You're such an idiot, Stan.
That's not a real gun.
And I'm not a real thief.
Hey, what the hell is going on? Nice work, Jennifer.
Wong, what the hell are you doing here? Sorry, A.
J.
To make this sting work, I had to leave you out of the loop.
You mean, she's? In on it.
Sorry to disappoint you, Mr.
Prosecutor.
Oh, terrific.
See? Maybe next time you won't be so quick to underestimate the power of my imagination.
I live in fear of the power of your imagination.
The train's sold out, Sarah.
We can't just buy you a new ticket.
John, I'm so sorry.
You've been so great about everything.
Especially Harm.
Well, he's doing what any man would do.
Can't be easy watching the woman you love walk out of your life.
You marched out of that party so quickly, you forgot your jacket.
And your ticket.
Thanks.
I, uh, my pride wouldn't let me walk back in.
I appreciate it.
I know it wasn't easy coming here.
I just wanted to make sure Mac got to wherever it is she wants to go.
Why are you doing this? 'Cause it's the right thing to do.
I've stopped trying to stop you.
You ready, Sarah? All aboard! I'm sorry, John.
Fate just keeps finding a way to intervene.
Or maybe you just weren't holding on strong enough.
Good-bye, Sarah.
I'm ready.
Are you? Commander? We're ready to go.
You with us? Uh, y-yes, sir.
Oh, I forgot my coat.
I'll get it.
Thanks.
You all right? Yeah, I was just pondering the road not taken.
Yet.

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