Kickin' It (2011) s03e15 Episode Script

Temple of Doom

Okay, when it's halfway filled with water, you put the apples in like this.
Seriously, Kim? You've been put in charge of the school's Halloween party, and bobbing for apples is the best you got? Actually, Jerry, it's kind of scary.
Actually, Jerry, it's kind of scary.
Am I gonna get a Granny Smith or A Red Delicious apple You're a sick woman, Kim.
- Did you see his face? - Yes.
Guys, this party is gonna be epic.
We just have to find a place better than the school gym.
Got my Halloween decorations.
Uh, Rudy, you didn't get very much.
Yes, he did! I'll go get the rest.
We got ghosts, ghouls, goblins.
If it starts with a "G" and scares children, I bought it.
Even got a Guinea pig.
- Kids aren't afraid of Guinea pigs.
- Oh yeah, check this one out.
Oh! You can't tell which is the face and which is the butt.
I found out the hard way when I tried to kiss it.
Hello, my Wasabi friends.
- Hey, Wan Chi! - Wan Chi! Hit me up.
I've come to ask a favor.
We're hoping you can watch our temple for two weeks.
Why us? Because you possess those rare gifts of patience, honor and Everybody else said "no"? Most of them cut me off at "I've come to ask a favor".
I got you covered.
Are you traveling somewhere? We have been offered a prestigious opportunity to perform our ancient Shaolin techniques at the Pan-Asian Mung Bean Festival.
Ah, the Mung Bean, my favorite legume.
Jack and Kim are giving me the "I'm a geek" look, aren't they? Not just Jack and Kim.
Thank you, Milton.
I know I can depend on you.
Ah-ha! Bobbing for apples, nice.
Oh, that's pretty good.
Who's under there? I love Halloween.
- Don't - Don't - You - You Get all tough with me! I'm saying - Won't - Won't - You - You Come kick it with me? And we could have a ball, run up the wall! - That's just how we do.
- Come on! And no matter how much I chop and punch it's not as cool as kicking it with you.
Here we go, let's start the party! Chop it up like it's karate.
Everybody! - Don't - Don't - You - You Get all tough with me! I'm saying - Won't - Won't - You - You Come kick it with me? And we could have a ball, run up the wall! - That's just how we do.
- Come on! And no matter how much I chop and punch it's not as cool as kicking it with you.
We believe the temple is filled with living energy called chi.
Which needs to be balanced.
Now, the sand in the Zen Garden needs to be raked twice a day.
And that will help me balance my own chi? No, but it will get the neighbor's cat poop out of the sand.
So where are your friends? Oh, Kim's planning a big Halloween party and everyone else is helping.
Why aren't you there? Never really been a big party guy With he music and the scandalous hors d'oeuvres and that tawdry dancing ugh.
Why would you want to do that when you can stay home and get your science on? You remind me of an ancient warrior Yoshimi.
He didn't like to have fun either.
love with the beautiful Mariko, but he never made time to have fun with her.
Well, I always make time to make fun with the woman in my life.
As a matter of fact, I set an entire weekend aside just for candle-making with mother.
When Mariko left him for another, Yoshimi died of a broken heart.
Legend has it, his spirit is trapped in these temple walls.
Waiting for a kiss from Mariko to set him free.
Well, when it comes to a kiss, some girls are really worth waiting for.
You know, it's the thrill of the hunt that keeps you going back to the jungle.
You know what I'm saying? I really don't.
This is going to be so cool.
These severed heads and bloodied hands are going to scare everybody.
They're not gonna scare me.
I'm a Sensei who spent years learning how to eliminate all fear oh! Dead moth! Dead moth! Dead moth! What is all this? Oh, we're getting the dojo ready for Halloween.
Over my dead body.
Oh, that is a great idea.
You lie down with this fake hatchet in your head.
No dojo with my name on it will in any way participate in Halloween! Why are you so down on Halloween? It's just such a pointless holiday.
I mean, people wearing ridiculous jewelry, gaudy outfits and oversized wigs I mean, who does that? But these decorations are awesome.
Really? Rubber bats, ooh! Fake body parts! Oh! Candy spiders Please.
No, no, that was actually a real spider.
Are you okay? Well, it was just a teensy-weensy little spider.
I'm sure it was completely harmless.
Remember what I said, absolutely no Halloween! Uh, excuse me.
Um, what do you think you're doing? When we were thinking of where to have the party, I realized I had the perfect place! This creepy old courtyard outside the temple.
Well, not gonna happen, Kim.
I'll alert the Warriors with the gong of temple violations.
Oh, can I see that? Okay, I am having this party, Milton, whether you like it or not.
Well, let me tell you something, missy! I am in charge here.
And I will use every fiber of my being to stop you from throwing a Halloween party on these hallowed grounds.
People, please.
When you put your punch down, use coasters.
And Jerry! Stop diving into the Koi Pond.
Underpants is not a bathing suit.
Woo! Gahh! Hey! Come on! Kickin' it with you! I suspect Bobby's deep-seated hatred of Halloween is buried under years of repression.
There's no way he's gonna tell us what's behind it unless we're very clever and subtle.
Hey, Bobby.
What's your problem with Halloween? Finally, someone asks.
When I was 11, I trick-or-trat right here in this Mall.
My heart was filled with wonder and my pumpkin was filled with treats.
Well, you've associated Halloween with that bad memory.
Now all we have to do is associate Halloween with a happy memory and break the cycle.
I appreciate it, Rudy.
But I have got it under control.
Get those monsters away from me! Milton! You're ruining my party.
You kicked us out of the Koi Pond, lowered the music, and took down our zip line.
Yo! Check it out, people.
My turn! Woo whoa! Somebody should have told Jerry.
Let's see what Wan Chi has to say about your party when I call him.
- Dude.
- Milton.
Can I borrow your phone? I'm sorry, dude, I didn't bring my phone.
What's that sound then? That is the sound Of my new ringing pirate pants.
Yeah, they alert me when it's time to go to the bathroom.
Gahh! Huh, there has to be a phone here somewhere.
Knowing the Warriors and their simple way of life, it's probably designed to fit in with their decor.
Ah-ha.
The old horse leg phone.
Hello? Oh Yoshimi's journal.
This must have been his room.
Who's there? Jerry? I I know that's you.
Oh, let's all scare Milton on Halloween.
Well, it's not gonna work.
Okay, it might be working a little bit.
Yoshimi's back! And this time, he's gonna party.
Kickin' it with you.
This party's a dud.
Eyeball ice cubes in the punch.
Dirt cake and cupcakes covered in fake mold The mold is real, Albert.
Jerry forgot to refrigerate 'em.
Blegh I don't like it.
The only thing scary about this party is Jerry and his freaky friends on the dance floor.
Ah! Milton, did you know that there's mold on these cupcakes? That is clearly a health-code violation oh! Whoa, what are you doing? Ooh.
What is he doing? I don't know, but I like it! Milton! Milton! Milton! Milton! Milton! So how is going into a Halloween maze going to help Bobby overcome his fear? I came here every year as a kid during Halloween time.
Going through a Halloween maze is a magical experience that can last a lifetime.
So how come we're sneaking in? We're not gonna pay to get in.
It's just some crummy old maze.
Come on.
So what goes on in this maze of Hallow's Eve? Well, once you're in it, you try to find your way out of it while scary characters jump out at you.
- Oh.
- Don't worry.
They're just actors.
- Actors.
- Hold it right there, you three! - Where do you think you're going? - Oh, I got this.
We are but three lost souls ensnared in your maze of terror! This is fun.
Halloween maze closed down years ago.
You're on Douglas property now.
And we don't stand for no trespassers.
- I don't think this guy's an actor.
- You're telling me.
I didn't believe him for a moment.
And who did your makeup? It looks like you glued a chinchilla to your chin.
Now see, that I believed.
Bravo, Sir! Bravo! - Bobby - Mm? I think this guy's the real thing.
So This wacko farmer Really is a, uh Wacko farmer? - Run! Go, guys! - Get 'em, boys! Get 'em! Take it from me, ladies.
Those buffalo wings have quite a kick.
Milton, what's happening? Yoshimi's what's happening, honey.
I've been trapped in these walls for 200 years and I want to dance.
Oh, forget you.
Who's she? Can you believe that? What, that Milton thinks he's some guy named Yoshimi? No, that he thinks Laura Bitterman is cuter than me.
- Pfft, where is that coming from? - What is he thinking? Shut it.
Hey, you guys keep an eye on Milton.
I'm gonna go find out what's going on.
- Oh! Oh! Look out! They're coming.
- Where'd they go? - Go go go.
- I don't know which way.
It's like a maze in here.
I am exhausted.
I can't go on anymore.
Look at what we got here! Rudy, Bobby, I'm scared.
I just want to go home.
I am never celebrating Halloween ever again.
Aw, little boy's scared.
That is it, you backwards maze monsters! I had the joy of Halloween ruined for me.
You are not going to ruin it for the boy! Yeah, Bobby's right.
We're done running.
You heard 'em, boys! Get 'em! Oh, that was nice.
- That was awesome, guys! - Let's get out of here.
And for the first time in a long time Enjoy Halloween.
Uh, this is a bit awkward.
But could you kind gents please direct us out of here? No no, we'll figure it out.
Guys guys, I was in Yoshimi's room and this book explains what happened to Milton.
Book? Please when has anyone ever learned anything from a book? Yoshimi lost the love of his life, Mariko, because he never had any fun.
His spirit must have been trapped in his room and it somehow entered Milton's body.
Guys, Yoshimi's searching for his Lost Love.
Kim, please.
Look, if you think we believe that Milton is possessed by some cr You know, I think Kim's onto something.
Guys, yo, check this out.
Does this sketch of Mariko look like anybody we know? - Oh.
- That looks like me.
Kim.
I meant Kim.
Definitely Kim.
Yo, I think he's getting mad because he can't find Mariko.
I think he's getting mad because those crab puffs are all puff and no crab.
We just have to keep Milton calm until Kim's ready to come out.
Uh, hey, buddy.
How you doing? Look, Yoshimi, we know you're looking for Mariko.
Mariko! Where is she? Which one of you took her from me?! - He did.
- Wait! You probably shouldn't have done that! Ha! You just got flipped by Milt Guys! Die! Don't clap for that cheap magic trick.
He's obviously being held up by some kind of wire That you can't see at all.
So it looks like he's really flying.
I mean, it really looks like he's flying.
I believe.
I believe! Fly, boy! Fly! Uh, if anybody's mom's here to pick them up, I'd like a ride please.
Yoshimi.
It's me, Mariko.
Mariko.
Sweet Mariko.
I've ridden the waves of time for an eternity searching for you, my love.
You found me, Yoshimi.
Now you can move on from this world.
Well, I can't until you fulfill your promise of a kiss.
Absolutely.
If that's what I promised you, then I'm sorry, a what now? I cannot move on to the next world until your lips touch mine in this one.
Fine.
I will give you a kiss.
But don't try anything fancy! - Milton.
- Hey, Milton.
Dude, are you okay? I think so.
Do you remember anything? No.
Oh, dude, you turned into this 200-year-old spirit, and I totally dominated you.
Yeah, oh, and I loaned you 20 bucks.
- Jerry.
- Sorry.
Man, we're so glad you're back.
Because of you, Kim was able to throw the best Halloween party ever.
But it's over now.
Okay, let's wind the party down, get things cleaned up and get out of here.
Well, hang on a second.
The whole school's here.
Everybody's having fun.
Another couple hours won't hurt anybody.
Wow, you've changed, Milton.
Come on, Kim.
I'm the same guy I always was.
Uh, no, I've changed, definitely changed.
Kickin' it with you! Hey, Kim, um I got to admit this was a pretty great party.
Thanks, Albert.
You know, the spirit of Yoshimi left Milton and I think he Went into me.
And we know there's only one way to get him out.
Oh! Ow! Is he out or should we do it again? No, he's out.
Definitely out.
Kickin' it with you!
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