Life On Mars (US) s01e10 Episode Script

Let All the Children Boogie

You threw down with the loot's daughter in the file room? Very advanced, spaceman.
I told you a thousand times.
I didn't know who she was.
Of all the pretty girls in new york city, you had to choose maria? Yeah.
What happened?J.
Edgar hoover's daughter turned you down? Don corleo's daughter unavailable? The boston strangler's kid have a prior engagement? Yeah, all right.
That's enough.
You set me up, ray.
You practically threw me at her without mentioning that she was hunt's daughter.
Yeah, I had fun with that.
You know, maria never mentioned it, that--that hunt was her father either.
Well, that's 'cause they're estranged, spaceman.
But that don't mean he ain't protective of her.
It's true, sam.
Anyone ever heard of a pop star named Sebastian grace? Sebastian grace? Of sebastian grace and the electric insects? No one said nothing about any insects.
I'm a huge fan.
Uh, "the last planet I kissed"-- that-that's one of my all-time favorite songs.
Grace is here to play three nights at max's kansas city.
He's reived numerous death threats, and the intelligence division deemed them credible.
I have to give up a body to babit this creep.
- Who wants it? - I do.
I mean, i'll--i'll take it, if Then he's all yours.
Grace is staying at the drake hotel at park and 56th.
He checked in this morning.
You should head on down there now.
Thanks, loot.
Don't eat the brown acid.
Tyler.
We live in a small house here at the 1-2-5.
and in small houses, people talk.
They gossip like sugared up schoolgirls.
I got it on good graft that you engaged in a little hanky-panky in the file room During the interrogation of that russian.
- Boss-- - now a gentleman doesn't kiss and tell, so I ain't gonna ask.
But The nose knows.
- He does? - Let's just say I'll figure out who it was you defiled in my file rm.
And we'll see what kind of taste you have in women.
- Hey, sam? - What? Do you mind coming with me to the drake? Just until I meet sebastian grace.
I mean, the idea of it kinda makes me a little nervous.
He's--he's an idol of mine, and i You know, chris, sebastian grace will turn out to be a one-hit wonder, and "the last planet I kissed" will be his only hit song.
Eventually, in around 1975, he will fade into obscurity.
So will you come with me or not? Let's go.
Hey! You must be my great protectors.
I'm sebastian.
Well, don't just stand there scratching at your openings.
Come on in.
The party's just getting started.
- Yeah!Aah! - Whoo! My name is *** I was in an accident, and I woke up in 1973.
i don't know how or why i'm here, but whatever's happened, it's like i've landed on a different planet.
Now maybe if I can work out the reason, I can get home.
Proudly Presents Season 01 Episode 10 Cocktail? Sandwich?Quaalude? Quaaludes? We're cops.
Come, cops.
Meet my people.
This is bradley.
He's my manager.
Isn't he funny-looking? And this is grizzly.
He's our top dog roadie.
Meet my detectives, tyler and skeleton.
I'm not sure why they're required.
Don't mind grizz.
He also functions as my head of security, which means your mere presence here calls into question his relevance, both as a bodyguard and as a man.
No, do you speak or are you just here to look adorable? Oh, he's a-a huge fan.
He's a little starstruck.
A huge fan of what? Uh Of--of you.
- Really? - Yeah.
Don't be.
Man, I am-- i'm just like you.
I sleep all day, party all night, I get paid a zillion dollars to sing onstage, I make love to at least three girls at the same time While two others watch.
See?We're practically the same guy.
Practically the same.
See?Same.
Here.
Come meet the members of the electric insects.
We've got tarantula, c.
j Daddy cincinnati ladies, come meet my security detail for the week.
These are the pistons of my engine, new york edition.
We got lulu Sweet jane Mantis.
- Donna.
- Donna and The girl with all the candy, the belle of my bedbug ball-- rocket girl.
Nice to meet you - Rocket girl.
- Rocket--rocket girl.
My dad wanted to be a cop.
Now he's a mechanic Which means now he can fix everything but a traffic ticket.
Okay, well, I think i've had enough fun here.
You gonna be okay by yourself? Thanks for, uh, coming with me.
This is the greatest detail of my life! G-getting to go behind the rock 'n' roll curtain? - It - Yeah, good times.
- Come on, detective skeleton.
- I gotta Allow me to show you the stomach contents Be careful.
Within the belly of the beast.
How do you know where I live? Ray told me.
Yeah, of course he did.
Nice place.
Very eclectic.
And why did you fail to mention that you were gene hunt's daughter? I thought you already knew.
Not even close.
'Cause if I did, I wouldn't have done what we Did in the file room.
Sam, my father and I haven't been close in years.
He doesn't care what I do or who I date.
Let's have one glass of wine.
Just--just one glass.
What do you say? Maria I say you need to go.
We can't do this again.
We shouldn't have done That.
Look, you're very attractive, you're very smart, you know, very nice, very Well, you're all the "verys.
" but We have to shut this down.
Are you serious? I'm serious.
Fine.
So long.
Oh, and keep the wine.
Maybe you can use it to loosen the stick up your ass.
That's the latest death threat against the sebastian.
It was waiting for us when we checked in this morning.
That's a lot of exclamation points.
Yeah.
Well, i'll send this to the lab, see if they n lift some latent prints.
We fill venues a hundred times the size of max's kansas city, but it's where he got his start.
I didn't want to come here, not with this going on.
New york's a breeding ground for the lunatic fringe.
Where is sebastian? Where's sebastian? Where's sebastian? - Any-- - he just took off with rocket girl.
Took off? He can't just take off.
Wh-where did he go? Hey! Sebastian! Where are you going?! Oh! Oh! ah, no.
new jersey? detective skeleton, you come here, too? What are you doing taking off like that? Are you trying to get me in trouble? We're hoping to catch a glimpse of a flying saucer.
A flying saucer? There have been reports of u.
f.
o.
sightings in this very spot, and I would love to see one.
Well, we have to go back to the hotel.
All I need is 20 minutes.
Please.
Rocket girl, a-are you okay? I will be in 20 minutes.
Okayfine, but only 20 minutes.
Sip and savor while you wait.
It's the best grape soda ever made.
whoa.
Whoa! what is that? It's beautiful, baby.
baby, what the--hey! Rocket girl! G-- get back! Rocket girl! - Chris, you all right? - I'm sorry, loot.
I let him out of my sight.
I-i don't know what happened.
I can't remember.
Bright lights in the sky, and my grape soda floated.
Your what floated? Sebastian and--and rocket girl-- are they okay? Everyone's fine.
Don't worry.
We haven't found the others yet.
Hey! You have now.
Hey! They took her, man.
They took her.
They took-- they took rocket girl, man! Wh who took her, sebastian? The martians! The martians took rocket girl.
We were just getting*** A little love thing under the moon and the stars, and there was this light in the sky and this big, crazy noise.
Rocket girl gets out of the car, and then she was gone.
We've heard a lot of alibis in our day, but that has got to be the fruitiest.
All right?Except for the guy who told us that god came to him in the form of a pickle and told him to butcher his family.
You remember that guy, boss? Cucumber cartwright.
Yeah.
All I know is what I saw out on those wetlands.
What about your guy, d-detective skeleton? He had to have seen what i'm talking about.
He doesn't remember anything.
He was too busy watching his grape soda take flight.
Sebastian, what'd you put in that grape soda you gave him? A few microdots of lavender.
Acid.
You slipped our guy a mickey, huh? Our guy who's there to protect you? He needed to relax.
He's young.
He should be out snaring hoof, not wearing a necktie.
Look, we checkedith the f.
A.
A.
There were no flights anywhere near that airspace last night.
That's 'cause it was a flying saucer that took rocket girl.
Wait a secon you--you don't even know her real name, do you? Here's what I think.
You got her out there, you were all hopped up on drugs, you start fooling around.
Maybe you like it rough, 'cause you prancing types always do, 'cause you don't want to the world to know you got sugar in your shoes.
But things went too far.
You killed her by accident.
But in your l.
S.
D.
Haze, you panicked.
You dispose of the body.
How am I doing? Rocket girl is cool, man.
She runs fast with the new york groupie scene.
Emily wyatt is her real name.
Bronx girl.
She has a family that is worried about her.
Girls are not disposable.
They're not toy trains for men to take out of the box and go zoom zoom zoom with and then discard.
I don't give a damn that you're some fancy rock star.
You're gonna get no special treatment in my house.
Now if you were mel torm? And you told me some twirl was kidnapped, abducted by space aliens, things might be different.
So You either tell us what happened to that girl Or i'll show you my greatest hits.
We need to see sebastian, please.
Look, he's currently the subject Of an ongoing investigation.
You guys are gonna have to wait.
Come on, man.
Come on.
Yeah, I know, but i'm--i'm his manager.
I have the right to see him.
Chris.
Are you okay? Yeah, the--the hospital did some tests, and they said I was fine.
Is there any news on rocket girl? Her name is emily wyatt.
They questioned sebastian.
He's in holding.
He's still sticking to his story about flying saucers.
Chris,ow you feeling, pal? We got rocket twirl's father here.
You want in? Yeah, I do.
You sure you feeling up to it? Yeah.
Yeah, i-i want to see this thing through.
Come on.
Cookie, anyone? These are good.
Maple snaps, they're called.
Although i'm not sure why.
They probably use maple syrup in the recipe, mr.
Wyatt.
Never thought about that.
You sure you don't want to try one? They're delicious.
If you don't mind me saying, you don't seem all that worried about emily's disappearance.
I lost her a long time ago is why.
that's when she really disappeared.
Well, what happened in 1964? My wife--s brought home that 45 of the beatles.
"love me do," I think it was.
Emily was 13 at the time.
But when she heard that song-- pfft.
That was the beginning.
Beginning of what? Music.
Music became everything to her-- elvis, ricky nelson, the doors.
Eventually, she grew into a woman.
She got very attractive, learned she could actually use her good looks to get to know theseeirdos.
That's when we lost her for good.
So you have no idea where she might be? - Not at all? - No.
I doubt she's in any trouble, detective.
She wanders.
It's what she does.
Most likely, she left that rock star after he passed out drunk and ran off to find another one.
She's probably in morocco with the grateful dead.
Well, we're sorry for your loss, mr.
Wyatt, no matter what year it was.
You know, as a parent to a girl, you expect to lose your daughter one day-- firsto her friends, then to a high school quarterback, maybe, finally to her husband-- but you never, never expect to lose her to a drummer wearing eye shadow.
You wanted to see me, lieutenant? I did.
It has been brought to my attention that certain high jinks have been unfolding inside my house.
Hi jinks? Carnal high jinks, to be more specific In the file room.
- Okay.
- I'm no prude.
And god knows I understand the pressures of the job, especially when it comes to a guy like sam tyler.
He's been under a lot of pressure lately.
Nevertheless, it's disrespectful, especially when it extends to my team.
Even y, norris, I consider part of my team.
Sir? Mixing work with the personal leads to trouble, especially for the female portion of the equation.
I don't want to make you uncomfortable, but you understand what i'm saying here, don't you? It won't happen again,ir.
Attagirl.
No more carrying-on in the house.
That's allno-nuts.
Be on your way.
Sam, i, uh, found the guy.
The guy? Yeah, he's a guy that works for the fbi in the paranormal division.
The paranormal division? Yeah, yeah.
- What? - I guess, uh, nobody takes him too seriously over there.
I mean, in fact, they call him "the sorcerer.
" but, uh, maybe we should go talk to him.
What for? Look, I know this is gonna sound crazy, sam - Uh, yeah.
- But I think that sebastian was right.
I mean, there was lights and--and noises, and my grape soda floated last night, sam.
Chris, sebastian told us he dosed your grape soda with l.
S.
D.
He did? Then I guess i I guess I always hoped that there was, you know, something else out there, you know, beyond the here and now.
I mean, the--the possibility of aliens isn't that different from the possibility of angels.
I mean, don't you ever think, sam, that if aliens exist, then maybe there's hope for all of us after we die.
Uh, maria? Can we talk serious for a minute? Of course.
What's on your mind? You're jeopardizing sam's job with all this Subterfuge.
You know, your father would be furious if he found out, and god only knows what he might do to sam.
Are you sure you're more concerned about sam's job security than you are about your own wants? Sam is my friend.
That's all.
I'm sure that is all.
And i'm sure that very fact drives you crazy.
Hey, check it out.
Betty and veronica.
Which, of course, makes you three archie, reggie and jughead.
you know, ***** spaceman wasn't happy when you arrived, but I gotta say, since you showed up things have got ****** around you.
********* foolish.
So should we *** "the sorcerer"? Do you really believe ****** I don't know, maybe.
okay, take it from me.
wanting to believe sthg, doesn't make it so.
- Detective! - What is it? Rocket girl didn't go after ****** She's not **** or ******** if she's still missing, she's dead.
and I know who killed her.
His name is **** He's a guitar tech, a real creep.
And why would he kill emily? We met him a few years ago at a black sabbath show.
He became obsessed with emily.
He asked her out a bunch of times.
But she wouldn't go out with him? He wasn't in a band, and he was fat as a sow.
That still doesn't explain why he would kill her.
Where did you find this guy? Bob's stupid cop emporium? Honey, how about I lock you up on charges of aggravated dumb slut with no future? No, donna, just Go on, please.
He killed her because he couldn't stand her sleeping with all of these other men, these famous men.
He said that every time she slept with a musician, he couldn't listen to that band's records anymore.
He had to toss all of his creedence, his rod stewart, steppenwolf.
I'll bet he did it now because zeppelin's coming to town next month and they're his all-time favorite.
You were also a groupie of this traveling pig circus.
Now how do we know you didn't just concoct a lie to save sebastian's bony ass? I love sebastian, but he's not for me.
I prefer english rockers.
Hey, if the '60s were good for one thing, it's that women can screw and be screwed by whomever we choose.
I'm a father to three daughters All who consider me just north of nobody.
We got a strained relationship, see.
But they resent the hell out of me for one reason-- when they were growing up, I cared too much.
Maybe you did.
Horse muffins.
In fact, after hearing you spew your muck, i'm delighted to live a lifetime of lonely easters and thanksgivings.
'Cause I can always take comfort that my daughters didn't end up like you And rocket girl.
Donna, c--is there an address for--for carl stefanski?Please.
Police!Hands up high, chunky trunks! - Are you carl stefanski? - I am.
- Who are you? - I'm jack lalanne.
I'm here to introduce you to a new invention.
- It's called a salad.
- Do you have a warrant? I do have a warrant, but i'm afraid to show it to you 'cause I spilled some marinara sauce on it, and you might eat it.
Fat jokes make you happy, don't they? Oh, I feel about them the way you probably feel about chicken-fried cheese.
What did you do with emily wyatt's body? I don't know where she is.
- If that jerk hurt her-- - hey, guys.
In here.
What can I tell ya? Bare walls freak me out.
You've been sending sebastian grace death threats, haven't you? No one's perfect.
Where is she, you crazy bastard? Come on, carl.
Tell us where she is.
- Ray.
- If I kw i-i'd tell you.
I'd love to see her again, but I don't know.
I swear I don't know.
Huh, you killed her because you couldn't have her, right? I didn't kill her, but I loved her.
I loved her to pieces.
Yeah, did you leave her in pieces? Come on, ray.
Take it easy.
What do we do, sam? We bring him in for aggravated harassment for the death threats, secure a search warrant and toss this place, his car, his work, see what turns up.
You hanging in there? Be a whole lot easier if I had a noose.
How much longer do I have to stay in here? I'm not really sure.
Of course, living in a cage does have its own romantic virtues.
Keeps out the big, bad wolf.
Or it brings him closer to your door.
That, too.
Quite the existential crisis you're toying with in there.
I just hope those lights that took rocket girl away guided her to bliss.
I like to think that they did.
Certainly would provide you with a perfect alibi.
Really? 'Cause I may just be a drunken reprobate, lady, but even I could come up with a better alibi than "martians took her.
" you saying that she was eaten by the loch ness monster would be a better story than the one you cooked up.
What's your name? - Officer norris.
- Your first name.
Officer.
Annie.
Of course.
Little orphan annie.
Excuse me? Searching for a place to call home.
That's why you wear that costume, isn't it? Because people will like you if you wear a funny costume.
Interesting.
The man-child fancies himself an armchair psychiatrist.
Where did you learn about the intricacies of human frailty-- during an orgy in the back of a tour bus? Don't knock it till you've tried it.
No offense, but I think that your whole existence, although initially appealing, leaves a trail of destruction in its wake.
You roll into town, wreak havoc, then move on-- like a hurricane, only with bad hair.
Look at you A spoon with a little bit of fvor on it.
Oh, it's all wildly exciting until you step back and view the carnage.
Don't get sour, little orphan annie.
I wear costumes, too.
I know all about their hidden comforts.
What about you? What's next?Are you gonna put on a pair of pants and grow out your sideburns? Now call me old-fashioned, but it would be a crime against the better angels to see such a fair creature turn herself into one of the boys.
I think the word you're looking for is "detective.
" they couldn't possibly make detectives that look like you.
They will.
Perhaps extraterrestrials are trying to harvest my intellect.
Well, you're nothing if not persistent, maria.
I'll give you that.
Are you gonna let me in? I-i'm not wearing anything underneath this coat, and the draft is starting to bite.
You're really doing the "show up at the door with no clothes under the raincoat" thing? You know someday that'll be a clich? Someday isn't today, is it? Look, I know it's 1973, and it's a really exciting time to be a woman, but in my world, this kind of behavior was reserved for pop singers and reality show stars.
No offense to harry reasoner, but I think i'm putting a better product on the field.
I hear the way your father talks about you.
I know there's a rift, so I can't help but wonder if you're only doing this just because you know the endless amounts of suffering it'll cause him if he finds out about us.
My father and I haven't had a substantive conversation since I graduated from high school.
He gave me a fancy pen with my initials on it-- M.
N.
H.
, maria n.
Hunt.
What does the "n" stand for? That's the point.
My middle name is alice.
Maria, I am really not the guy to go working your daddy issues out with.
I mean, I got a few of my own, okay? And I work with your aforementioned daddy.
I mean, you have no idea how unstable my world is.
I'm just a visitor here.
You--you do not want to get attached to me.
Mm, that's where you're wrong.
I-i want to attach myself to you All night long, and en Maybe once again in the morning.
All right, just do me a favor.
No more talk about your father.
Okay.
His name is stephen morrell, but they call him "the sorcerer," and his entire department exists to investigate the paranormal.
And he--he comprises the entire department.
There's a rich and tangy firmament out there right now for the bizarre and the unexplained.
The bizarre and the unexplained? Yes.
Because even though all of our scientists would love to eliminate magic fromeligion, how do you do that? How do you do that when a seed sprouting from the ground -- or the marvel of a functioning umbilical cord are just as miraculous as any fairy imp or army of zombies leaping from the crypt? People want to believe.
And yet even the best of our scientists skew the credibility of their theories with unwarranted assumptions.
The key is to avoid falling for contrived realities and to get back to what has always been the fundamental reason for science To learn about new things.
So Has there ever been a u.
F.
O.
Sighting in the meadowlands? Oh, quite a few, in fact.
Okay.
So assuming that our missing girl was taken by aliens or whatever, uh, w-where do you think that she might be? Most likely she's wandering the streets of new york city, but Somewhere in the past.
The past? Well, many who claim to have been abducted by aliens share similar stories-- the spaceship snatched them up and took them on a journey only to plop them back down in the same place they were snatched from, but years earlier.
Will emily wyatt ever get back home? It's difficult to say.
Maybe or maybe not.
But if she does, she'll doubtless retain no memory of what happened to her.
In some ways, she'll always remain "missing.
" oh, my god.
i'm here! Here! I'm here! i'm here! Take me home! Take me home! Please! I wanna go home! it's a specialized, unauthorized area of the wetlands which is often used as a testing ground for new military aircraft-- in this case, a prototype helicopter with terrain-following radar that allows it to perform what are called "nape of the earth" missions.
The l.
S.
D.
That you and sebastian grace imbibed made it seem more than that.
There were no martians, no spaceship.
And carl stefanski was not involved.
But, uh, how did rocket girl die? The thrust of the aircraft is so strong that it actually forced her down deep into that soft, porous swale of the wetlands.
So basically she drowned.
Yes.
There was no crime.
You hear that, chris? The earth is safe from the little green men once again.
And this time, the contrived reality was the correct explanation.
Yes, but how do you know they're not on their way here now? Yeah, well, I hope they're bringin' a pizza, 'cause i'm starvin'.
I guess we'll have to cut the rock star loose.
Well, at least we nailed stefanski for making death threats against him.
Yeah, keeping the world once again safe for the arrogant bastards who treat girls like crap.
This one is for rocket girl.
hello.
What's this? Two backstage passes to tonight's gig at max's kansas city.
Apparently, i'm a free man, and the show will go on.
I have plans tonight.
Oh, come on.
Let me show you some more intricacies of human frailty.
I know 'em all.
No.
Well, just think about it.
I don't know how much longer i'm gonna be in this racket.
This whole rocket girl thing has just really got me thinking about forever.
one more thing, because it would be a violation of my subculture not to say it-- you are a really, really, really Really sexy chick, little orphan annie.
You okay? You know, i-i just wisthat everything wasn't so Explainable.
Trust me.
Everything's not.
You know, i-i wish that there was just a sign, you know, that things aren't always what they seem.
We live, we die Nobody knows why.
I wanted to give you something.
It's a saint christopher medal.
I want you to have it.
What for? Saint christopher is the patron saint of travelers.
I think of you as a traveler, sam.
whoa.
Where are you going? To the sebastian grace concert.
He gave me two tickets.
Do you want to go? Yeah.
I mean, that sounds like fun.
I was talking to chris.
Okay.
Heck, yeah! Thanks.
I I'll see you, sam.
Bye.
Do I get to say, "i'm with the band"? I've always wanted to say, "i'm with the band!" you get to say, "i'm with the band.
" yeah! The zolfo file.
You seen it? Unh-unh.
MNH Proudly Presents Season 01 Episode 10
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