Lost Girl (2010) s03e11 Episode Script

Adventures in Fae-bysitting

Ahhhhhhh! Aaaaaand, cue the blond in the babydoll dress walking into the woods.
Alone.
Human sashimi, anyone? I could rescue her.
So easily.
Yes, yes you can chi-suck your way to victory.
You are a superstar.
You really can do anything.
Uh, except fix my relationship.
True.
You suck at coupledom.
I think what you meant was, "no worries Bo-Bo, you're just on a break.
" Totes what I meant.
Love conquers all.
Soul mates for life.
Carpe Lauren.
When was the last time you were on a date? Pffff Dating is so not a thing anymore.
It's all about group-hangs.
Besides, I have a vibrant inner life Oh, that reminds me: We need to get more batteries.
Uh oh No! No, I actually feel okay.
This little break is just part of the Bo and Lauren journey.
We will be together in our own time.
I know you will, sweetie.
Oh, fresh meat! The babysitter.
Annnnnnd the phone's ringing.
Mmmmm Spoiler alert: The call is coming from inside house! Which, P.
S.
, means the killer is inside the house! Oh, no!!! No, don't pick up the phone! Get out of the house! Get out of the house!!! Parker residence.
Hey there.
Look sleaze, this ain't the perv hotline Lisa, it's Tim.
Mr.
Parker? I'm sorry, I didn't recognize your voice.
I thought you were Wait, aren't you in India right now? Well, I'm just checking in.
Of course.
Well Ashley was a total angel tonight.
Even ate all her broccoli.
You're the only one who can get her to eat her veggies.
With you in that tank top, I'd eat anything you wanted.
That neckline really shows just how much you've grown in the past year.
I'm hanging up now.
Shit! Who's there?! Ahhhh!!! Lisa.
Lisa? Mrs.
Parker Sweetheart, you fell asleep.
No but Mr.
Parker He was here!! No, honey, Tim's on a business trip.
Remember? Oh, darlin', I'm gonna get you a glass of water.
Life is hard when you don't know who you are.
It's harder when you don't know what you are.
My love carries a death sentence.
I was lost for years Searching while hiding.
Only to find that I belong to a world hidden from humans.
I won't hide anymore.
I will live the life I choose.
Oh man, this takes me back.
Look at us, Bo-Bo.
God, we were so young Thanks for calling, Lisa.
And where did you find this? On a bulletin board at a coffee shop.
Under a poster for meditation classes.
It's been awhile since we've taken on a case cold, but it might be fun.
I, mean Satisfying.
Mmkay So, Caroline and Tim Parker Now, you're sure that this gated community isn't built on an ancient burial ground? Portal to hell? Something happened to Tim Parker.
Did you accidentally sacrifice a virgin? Kenzi.
What? It happens.
This isn't the first time something bizarre has happened in Shady Grove.
Look, I think we can help you.
Just One second One second Just One second Ok, not that I don't love the idea of Bo and Kenzi playing desperate housewives, but this chickie's got nada to go on.
Look at her, Kenzi, she is terrified.
Or, medicated.
Maybe taking the suburbs by storm is just what the doctor ordered.
Alert the neighbourhood watch Hotties be invading.
Uh huh.
Okay.
Okay.
Detective Dyson? Yes? May I sit? The Ash sent me.
Uh Please.
My name is Anita.
A few weeks ago, I felt pain like I've never felt before.
Like a part of me was ripped out.
At the same time, I lost contact with my sister.
She was Your twin.
Identical, yes.
How did you know? Uh, twins have a bond, a connection unlike any other, right? So, you say you lost contact with her? Riley was traveling.
She usually checked in every couple of weeks or so, and then she stopped.
Will you help me? Of course.
That's my job.
Block parties, neighbourhood watch, the list goes on and on and on and on, this neighbourhood is wonderful! Come on in! Just went on the market Mmmhmm Great price First to look at it.
Wow! Well, thank you I hope you're impressed.
Wow! Hardwood! Oooooh And all this natural light.
This is, like, grown-up nice.
What's wrong with our place? It has character.
Yeah, and roach-termite hybrids.
So! What do you ladies think? I love the high ceilings Mmmhmm And would your husband like them? Well, I'm looking for a fresh start, actually We both are.
My sister Kenzi here just left rehab.
Anti-depressants.
Turns out there is such a thing as "too perky.
" And you? Well, my partner laur ence and I we're taking a break.
He left her at the altar.
For our other sister.
I can't even Oh, sweetie, you'll be better off for it.
I learned that after my second divorce.
Oh, no, like I told you We're just on a break.
Shady Grove is without a doubt the best community in the city.
Wonderful energy.
Great parks.
Nice people.
Great, because I'm very concerned about safety.
Oh, you ladies heard I was gonna tell you.
Tell us what? The gentleman who owned this house previously Jake Thatcher Disappeared.
Left all his furniture and a substantial collection of lingerie catalogues.
He was one of Shady Grove's most eligible bachelors.
Oh! He would've been perfect for you! More perfect than Vic Voyeur, I hope.
So sad.
Maybe he's just looking to get into the neighbourhood? No, he lives next door.
Sam lost his wife, got weird.
Has a weird ten year old, too.
I don't think he was breastfed Excuse me, ladies.
Hello? You started without me?? Okay, calm down.
I'm coming I'm coming okay I'm so sorry, ladies.
I forgot I had another appointment.
My friend Caroline is just losing it! Take a look around as long as you like.
And lock up when you leave, ok? Thank you! You're welcome! Caroline? As in Caroline Parker? The maybe-widow of the supposed world-traveler, Tim? Add one missing former home owner And it looks like our babysitter might be onto something.
Whaddaya say we get to know the neighbours? Great.
See anything? Sweet Jesus! What?! It's like Extreme Makeover Safari Edition Please tell me they're watching a horror film? I don't think so Okay Come on.
Hey, I thought only stupid girls ran into the house.
Yeah, unless she's got this.
Then she's just awesome.
Bo! Oh! Wow! You ladies sure know how to make an entrance.
Do you always bring a knife to book book club? Book club? Please tell me you're reading "50 Shades Of Grey.
" Seriously Bo, do you want the cash or the jewels? Sorry, my old neighbourhood was a little rough And, um, we heard screaming.
Screaming just means we were dishing about our neighbours.
Fresh marg? Thank you, Caroline.
It's, uh, it's a beautiful home that you have.
Yes, it's very Ashram-chic.
Wow, look at these figurines.
And that's quite the necklace My husband, Tim, brings me beautiful things from his travels.
Helps guide my spiritual awareness.
Gives me balance.
I've always wanted to go to India.
Girl, Tim's in Mumbai right now.
I'll text him Tell him to bring our single lady something special.
Good idea Oh no, please And "technically" I'm not single Don't worry, love, she's already dished about your little break-up.
It's more of a break.
I say, if it's getting hard, something's wrong.
Hmm I always say the opposite.
If it's getting soft am I right? I'm good at book club.
Oh, we should totally set Bo up with Pete, the tennis pro? Yeah, if she likes 'em hairy and sweaty.
Do you? She likes 'em all.
It doesn't matter Pete only has eyes for Tits McGee, A.
K.
A.
Lisa.
She's our babysitter.
She's very good with the children And she could nurse a whole village of 'em! Well, good help is hard to come by.
No, Lisa is great, she just has a "lively" imagination.
Well, speaking of neighbourhood men, our peeping tom? Sam? Oh, you're kidding.
Mmhm, he was skulking around the Thatcher house, looking at us in the window.
Gross.
When Sam first moved in, he hosted barbecues, he signed up to coach soccer He even fixed my downstairs sink when Tim was out of town.
But then? He started getting shifty.
Keeping to himself Sounds like somebody you'd hear about on the six o'clock news.
I heard his wife disappeared under mysterious circumstances.
She couldn't cook anyway Which is fine because, creepy as Sam is, is magic with a saute pan.
He's coming to my afternoon BBQ.
You guys should come too, both of you Yeah! Sounds great Sigh I need another Margarita.
Oh, here we go Eleanor? Honey? Eleanor's been like this ever since Christmas.
She lost her husband suddenly, it was so tragic.
I need to pee.
I'm gonna stick around and see if I can talk to Lisa.
See if you can get any info on Sam any info will do.
I'm on it.
This kinda feels like old times.
I know, maybe we should get new flyers made.
Yeah, like, headshots.
I'm so game.
Tell me what you come up with, ok? Oh honey, absolutely.
Ha ha ha I just need to take some personal time.
Okay.
Honey, do you want to talk to my spiritual advisor? You always a little get PMS-y during the waning moon.
Caroline, I need to go away.
And break up our club? No, Ellie, we need you.
What are we gonna do about Sam? What we're not gonna do is panic.
Okay.
Good.
All right, all right, forget about the particle accelerator Did I mention to you our state of the art nuclear resonance lab? But do you have mold? Well, I am flattered from the offer, Isaac, I am, but as I told you yesterday and the day before I have a job.
At Ash Pharmaceuticals.
An R&D company so small, I've never heard of them And I've heard of everyone.
So, let me be frank with you Everything I've read about you implies that you're innovator.
That you're a risk taker.
That you're willing to chase after greatness.
You're not a mold farmer.
Goodbye, Issac.
I'll call you tomorrow Goodbye.
Did you find anything? Maybe.
Do you know Sam Evans? Yeah.
I totally babysit his son, Ethan.
Like twice a week.
Well, not anymore.
He might be dangerous.
Do you know where he goes when you babysit? No.
He sort of flies solo.
Keeps to himself.
Yeah, so I've heard.
Lisa! How's suburbia? Oh, you know, filled with tofu scarfing, crystal rubbing, Buddha bumping hypocrites.
Yeah, they're zen, alright until they get a single scratch on their luxury SUV.
People have always searched for guidance, Kenzi.
Even those who have to commute.
You get that from your big fortune cookie book? No.
But I did find a name.
Hm Sam Evans! Lisa.
Lisa Allan.
What? Lisa is a Duppy.
A fae spirit who lives in the earth.
And look at this: This one was reported missing a hundred years ago.
Are you telling me she's fae and doesn't know it? She's not just fae.
She's dead.
Uh oh Bad news usually comes in threes.
Fae, dead and? Duppies have a very specific calling Lisa, what did you do?! I've done as asked.
Oh, Eleanor Clatter! I've done as asked.
Yeah You mentioned that.
So she's basically a killing machine.
That "brings darkness" and can be invoked every hundred years, yes.
What a cute name Who names a killer "Duppy?" If she's dead, what's making her go? Duppies don't have chi per se.
They run on the energy of those who invoke them to kill.
Lisa's essentially an empty vessel.
An empty vessel who cared enough to come to us.
Maybe when she wakes up, she can tell us who's doing this to her.
My money's on Sam Evans.
There is just something off about that guy.
Duppies black out after each kill.
Lisa won't remember a thing.
Like fae-mnesia? Exactly.
If Sam is invoking Lisa to kill people, we need proof.
Where am I? Lisa, it's Bo.
You're ok.
You're in a safe place.
What happened? I.
got it.
Come on, Lisa We'll go have a beer.
Or, five.
So, I kill people? And I'm dead? On the bright side killer dead babysitter: the TV movie writes itself.
Okay, bad joke here have any one of these, it'll take the edge off.
Oh, I don't have ID.
Honey, you're like a thousand years old.
I think it's kosher.
I'm supposed to grow up.
Be a doctor.
Help people.
Look, you are fae.
That makes you special.
And maybe you can even learn to control it like Bo.
Control when I kill people? Where I kill people? How I kill people? Okay, so the Totally sucks.
I get it But it is not your fault.
Somebody else is doing this.
Then they can do it again.
Look, Bo is going to Caroline's BBQ to do some recon.
Wait that's today? Oh, man, I'm supposed to babysit Ethan.
No, no, no, you gotta stay here with Trick.
And these pretty drinks.
But I promised.
I'll do it.
It'll give me a chance to poke around the psycho's pre-fab home while I'm at it.
Ethan is super high maintenance.
I have fought the Garuda.
I think I can handle one ten year-old.
Daddy always makes my grilled cheese with munster! Daddy have the same anger issues you do? It tastes like crap! I slaved over a hot microwave making that sandwich! Sigh you have to eat something, Ethan.
No! Do you know what they do to little kids who don't eat their dinner? They come after them in the middle of the night, from closets and under the bed.
What does? Goblins! To eat you for dinner.
Oh, my God, I sound like my mother Okay Okay Okay, let's just We'll start again.
I will make you a new sandwich.
Just show me where the weirdo cheese is.
No! I want Lisa! And you smell like gasoline! Way to go, Not-Lisa.
Bo, I think I found Sam's hit list.
And I get why some kids are sent to work in the mines.
Paul Haynes? So the murders go all the way back to Eleanor's husband? Okay, I'm up.
Hang in there, babysitter.
Looks delicious Live crabs look delicious to you? Well, normally I boil them first.
Squish or there's that.
Boiling them live actually toughens the flesh.
So you stab them into deliciousness.
Good to know.
So How long have you lived in Shady Grove? Six months or so.
Do you like it? Sure.
Your hands are so soft Sam, where's Eleanor? She had to leave.
So you had her killed.
No.
What about Jake Thatcher? He was my friend.
Tim Parker? Eleanor's husband? Your wife? She lives in San Diego now.
With the man that took her from me.
Cheater.
Tim Parker was a cheater too.
Bo! Just the lady I was looking for.
I'm gonna steal you for a couple of minutes.
Where are we going? It's a surprise.
You'll see.
Everyone's looking forward to your crabs, Sam.
Wow, well, look who decided to show.
What can I say? I live to work.
And drink, apparently.
Well, you said I had to be here.
You did not say I had to be sober.
You look like shit.
What's this? Trip down memory pain? Her twin showed up, looking for her.
What are the odds.
Thing is, I was so bent on vindicating Bo, that I was focused only on the feeding signature And not these other wounds.
Look at these abrasions I think she was dragged to that alley from another kill site.
Well it's not the worst theory I've ever heard.
Thank you.
Looks like you got this covered, big boy What, you're bailing? What's with you lately? Why? Because you care? Very much.
One more crack outta you and your neck's gonna look like hers.
Three, four, five six.
Last time I checked, Bo only had five fingers on her hand.
Come on, let's go.
Where? Back to the crime scene.
Cover those up And maybe try a little makeup! So I detected the microbial volatile organic compound, here And that's it.
Excellent work, Lauren.
I've been busy with my upcoming inauguration, so I appreciate your attention to detail.
Maybe now is the right time to request a brief sabbatical? I have a personal project I'd like to pursue.
No.
No? You need to stay here, where I can protect you.
But you're not protecting me.
You're keeping me prisoner.
I know you broke up with your girlfriend and you need space.
But that is not my problem.
Bo is not your boss.
I am.
And a year ago, you were just a cop.
The dark get their hands on you, they'll kill you, Lauren.
You're pledged to the ash, Dr.
Lewis.
I fought by your side, Hale.
Take the weekend if you like.
And we'll see you Monday.
It's true what they say about power.
It doesn't change people.
It reveals them.
First thing Monday morning.
What's going on, ladies? Oh There it is.
That power.
You were using it on Sam.
We were just talking.
Don't be shy.
I knew it the second I saw you.
The dark red aura.
Strong A survivor, Bo.
We want you to join our circle.
We're short a member.
Eleanor.
She was weak.
Not like you.
You have power, Bo.
Haven't you ever wanted to channel that power? To feel more? To have more? We're just gonna have so much fun together! This shit is a blast.
So, what do you ladies do for fun? Stuff like this, for starters.
Goddess of the Lunar Light Mistress of the Seas, give me darkness, give me night, please doth do appease.
What do you say, Bo? You bitches are witches.
And you can count me in.
Eek! So, normally, we'd start out slow.
But we have some unfinished business.
You'll catch on.
Oh my God Do you remember when we did away with Paul? My handsome husband who, as it turned out, had an apartment in the city.
And a whore inside that apartment.
He was our first.
But, then we had a body to deal with.
Which I was I found a spell and got rid of the body ta da! I don't know how I feel about killing people.
Oh, diva, please! We are just using what the universe gave us to rid ourselves of the negative forces in our lives.
Like cheaters.
Was Laurence a cheater? No, no, no If anything, it was me And I keep telling you, we're just on a break.
You're in denial, Bo.
You need to heal.
Isn't there a part of you that wants vengeance? Oh, Susan! This is not about vengeance.
This is about strong women understanding their worth, and taking back the power in their lives.
We are not gonna be a slave to their shitty patriarchal! Oh Hold that thought.
Trick, hey One of the tunnels under the dal flooded, my back-order of guinness finally came in, and two centaurs got into it over a woman? Yeah, I'm kind of in the middle of something here Stop talking so much.
Stop yelling at me in front of her.
You ramble, just smile when she looks at you.
Fine.
I lost Lisa.
What! We need to find her.
We need to find out who's targeting her.
And we need to find out who she's being targeted to kill.
I think I got that covered.
There's a trinket that humans need in order to invoke the Duppy.
It's called a macuto.
You find that and you can stop her from killing again.
You on that, too? Like Kenzi at a waffle bar.
Who was that? My psychic! I didn't tell him anything, but he knew something big was happening.
Something is.
Isaac I never took you for a stalker.
Well, I prefer super fan.
I really debated whether I was gonna come back here, but I got something I think you need to see.
What is it? I was curious why you spent five years hiding in the Amazon jungle; trouncing through Afghanistan.
Being off the map.
I'm adventurous.
I asked my lawyers, who I pay an offensive amount of money to look into it, they did and they're very good.
They dug up a bone I think you wanted to keep buried Karen.
I don't respond to blackmail.
Yeah, well, my lawyers don't want me to associate with a known fugitive.
So I fired them.
What? I don't care what you did or why you did it.
Everyone has secrets.
You're no stranger to reinvention.
And we both know you could use a fresh start.
So, that's the only copy.
Do with it what you want.
Are you serious? Well, that's what freedom looks like.
That's what you wanted, right? You sleepy? No.
Dude, we've read each one of your story books.
What would Lisa do that I'm not doing? She'd tell me a story.
So Once upon a time there was this superhero.
Named Superkenz.
Why was he a superhero? She, dumbass.
I dunno.
Because she was awesome.
What were her powers? If you're gonna back seat drive this thing I'm not even gonna bother.
I won't if you tell it better.
Superkenz wasn't just any human.
Not only did she have killer personal style, but she had a smorgasbord of powers.
Her sense of smell was as strong as a wolf's.
And when she sang, she could knock people out just like a siren.
What's a siren? A douchebag who wears stupid hats.
Forget about him.
Anyway, one time, this evil creature called a Kitsune kidnapped her and put her in a cave This is getting scary.
But Superkenz, she was really smart too.
She whooped that ginger bitch's ass, escaped the cave And succubused a whole frat house on the way home, just for kicks.
You just said the "b" word, the "a" word and ginger! I wanna be like Superkenz.
You and me both, buddy.
You and me both.
Wow Binding.
Feel the energy in the wind, feel the energy in the trees around us.
Feel it move through your body.
Feel us becoming stronger, as one.
We call to you.
We invite you here.
Go to avenge us.
Shed no tear.
All that you are, and all that I am.
Draw us the blood, of one man Sam.
Sam? And Kenzi.
We agreed to take down that price-gouging misogynist at the mechanic shop.
Who gives a rat's ass about Sam? I don't think I'm ready for this after all I don't think you get how this works.
The circle can't be broken unless we all agree to unbind it and now that you've contributed your power? Lisa's gonna be unstoppable.
Kenzi? I'm home.
Kenzi? Lisa? It's you?? This whole time, I thought it was Caroline The Book Club! Oh, no dead girl walkin'! Lisa, honey, put the pointy, kill-y thing down.
Where's Ethan?! He's upstairs.
He's fine.
Lisa, it's me, Kenzi.
You have to stop! You can stop! Caroline, look at me.
You don't want to do this.
Oh my God! That is better than sex.
Then you're doing it wrong.
I've been destined for this my whole life.
You're just a human who got lucky and found a fancy hoodoo necklace.
The point is, there's nothing we can't do! Make ourselves younger, take over the PTA get free blowouts.
Honestly, Susan! Every time I think you can't get any stupider Oh classy.
What a good friend.
Oh, whatever.
The power lies in the circle.
In our collective energy.
So why do you get to be the leader? Who the hell does she think she is anyway? I was wondering the same thing.
That's amazing.
And you Are a bitch! You're an idiot, Susan.
And as usual, you have no idea what you're doing.
Unlike you, who's using an innocent teenage girl to live out her sick revenge fantasies.
Shut up.
You shut up! What's happening? I'll just take that I can't control it, Kenzi.
I can't.
I hate stupid book club.
And gluten-free bread.
And killing innocent people! Tim wasn't innocent! He cheated on me! Over and over and over! I'm talking about Sam! The hot new dad on the block.
Who rejected you when you tried to sleep with him.
Nobody rejects me.
Ha! Everyone does! Our yoga instructor, our mechanic, Eleanor's eighteen- year old son! Suck on that vegan energy bar, you bitch! Susan, you are so strong.
You know not your true strength, child.
But soon you will.
And the world will bow down before us! I'll be damned Who are you? Okay! What the hell? Where are we? Crime scene's back there.
I smelled something.
If you're chasing tail, I so don't want to be on the ride-along.
That dead fae, Riley She was dragged from here.
I'm sure of it.
I'm glad you're here with me on this one, partner.
Dyson, I I have to tell you something.
Some serious shit is about to go down Tams, call it in What? This whole field It smells like death.
Bo, it's time.
Are you ready? Is this really the only way? She's running on what's left of the witches' chi, and she's fading fast.
It's a mercy.
Trust me.
Will it hurt? No.
Lisa, are you sure this is what you wanna do? I'm eighteen, and I've never kissed a boy.
I've never been to Europe.
I'll never be a doctor.
I'm also already dead.
Please I just need a second.
It's hard for me to know I'll never have what you have.
I mean, look at you.
Your life's a mess.
Thanks.
I mean you have a life to mess up.
You have family and friends And memories.
Even if they're bad ones.
I never really thought about it that way.
I'll be invoked in a hundred years.
And a hundred years after that.
Whomever has this necklace will be able to summon the dark.
Make me kill.
What if I'm there for you, Lisa? I'll be around in a hundred years.
And a hundred years after that.
That is the first time I've ever said that out loud.
You're gonna stop me from hurting people? Every time? I give you my word.
But no.
Kenzi said that being fae was special.
But I don't want to be special.
I want to be human.
If I can't have that, I want to be at peace.
Will you give me that? I promise.
That feels nice.
You have such a pretty face.
Goodnight, sweet girl.
Back to sleep Oh They will never use you again.
Hug.
Now.
I'm so sorry you had to go through that.
What am I doing? What do you mean? I mean, what am I doing here, Kenzi? Here, where? What are you talking about? When I was in the temple during the dawning, I saw something.
I felt something.
More dead people? Love.
It was a vision.
Or maybe a memory.
I don't know, but I didn't see his face It was my father.
Are you serious? I can't stop thinking about it.
I feel different it's like I have this power I didn't have before.
And I think my dad has something to do with it.
Wow Your dad that's that's huge.
I have to find him, Kenzi.
I think we need to deal with one thing at a time.
Enough with this dance a break up, or not a break up.
That is the question.
I am so much better with weapons.
I know, but You're a big girl.
Just rip the bandaid off.
Seek closure, grasshopper.
You are so wise.
Hello? Hi, Lauren? It's Isaac.
Do you need help with your suitcase? Where are you? Closer.
Hotter.
Hello, hello! You ready? Um.
.
I have canceled the newspaper and put my cable on hold and there's enough food in the cat bowl to last a month.
You can bring your cat with you.
I don't have a cat.
I was joking.
I joke when I'm nervous.
I see.
This is a very big step for me.
And a giant leap for science.
There's nothing to worry about, trust me.
Okay, I'm just gonna bring this down to the limo I'll be right down.
This is the beginning of something big.
There are so many.
And so many different kinds.
A Mermaid that was fed on by a Wendigo.
A Baku by a Mare.
Dark and light.
This doesn't make sense fae don't feed on other fae like this.
You ok? No These people died in fear, I can feel it Hey That's a Qarinah.
I haven't seen one of these outside of Egypt before.
Well, what is she doing here? You know, a Qarinah's feeding signature is similar to that of a succubus.
Six fingers.
Guess we know who killed Riley.
So, our girl has sex with Bo, then a few hours later is killed by a rare Egyptian fae, then dragged to the alley from this dump site? This isn't a dump site, Dyson.
It's a mass grave.
Something is hunting the fae.

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