Lost In Space (1965) s01e11 Episode Script

[ Man Narrating .]
Last week, we left Dr.
Smith dozing as Will worked over the Chariot.
Will was unaware that, within moments Dr.
Smith's carelessness would imperil all their lives.
You see, Will, even as a boy your age I was determined to be a scientist.
Believe me, there is no worthier ambition.
How gratifying it is to work for the betterment of mankind-- to strive for the unattainable.
How about doing a little striving on this engine? I am a scientist, not a menial mechanic.
You're a four-star goldbrick, Smith.
Sticks and stones may break my bones, but your words can never harm me.
Maybe I can get faster results this way.
Uh, there is no need for belligerence.
You have my cooperation.
- The bad unit is in the centrifugal repressor, Don.
- See if you can replace it.
I await your orders, mon capitaine.
We have to put a new fuel pack in the Chariot.
Your wish is my command, sir.
It's over there.
- Aye, aye, sir.
- And handle it carefully.
That fuel could explode on contact with air.
Never fear.
Smith is here.
[ Groans .]
I don't know why we even bother with him, Will.
- Dr.
Smith has some good qualities.
- I have yet to find any.
I can't carry this thing by myself.
Come on.
It's not that heavy.
Put it in back of the Chariot.
I'll, uh, hook it up later.
A man of my talents being used as a beast of burden.
If you have no further use for me, I shall return to my quarters on the Jupiter 2.
A great feeling of weariness seems to have taken possession of my body.
You're always tired and hungry.
That's your natural state.
[ Hissing .]
Don, do you smell something? The fuel pack! Get back! It can explode any second! Don! - Don, are you all right? - Yeah, I'm all right.
- What an unfortunate occurrence.
- I told you to be careful with that fuel cell.
I was.
It's not my fault that something went wrong.
We could have been killed because of your stupidity.
If I had the intelligence of a goose, I'd still be a genius compared to you.
All that brainpower you're always talking about must be well hidden because nobody notices it except yourself.
- I've had enough of these-- - All right! That's enough! Now, what's all this about? Well, Will, perhaps you can tell me.
I'm waiting for an answer, Will.
Well Don asked Dr.
Smith to get a new fuel pack and I guess it developed a leak.
Because of his carelessness.
It was an accident due to a malfunctioning mechanism.
I'm sure that's all it was, Dr.
Smith.
Why don't we just drop the whole thing? You're a very understanding man, Professor Robinson.
And now, Dr.
Smith, let's, uh-- let's discuss the accident at the hydroponic garden.
- The garden? - It was your responsibility this week, wasn't it? As a matter of fact, it was, but I've been so busy-- You haven't had a chance to do anything about it.
That's very true.
I was just about to go over there when you arrived.
- If you'll excuse me-- - No, no, no.
Save yourself a walk.
- We don't have a farm anymore.
- What happened to it? It died of neglect.
Oh.
I'm terribly sorry.
Unfortunately, Dr.
Smith, your being sorry doesn't make up for lost food.
I don't know what to say.
I do.
I don't know how the others feel, but I'm fed up with you! Every time something goes wrong around here, you're at the bottom of it.
You're a troublemaker.
The sooner we get rid of you, the better off we'll all be.
Are those also your feelings, Professor Robinson? I see.
Well, there seems to be only one recourse left for me.
I shall leave immediately.
Let him go, Will.
Yeah, let him go.
Mom.
- Yes, dear? - Nothing.
It was just a thought.
About Dr.
Smith? Will, no one's forcing him to leave.
No one asked him to stay either.
Couldn't you talk to Dad? Talk to me about what? - You aren't really going to let him go? - Of course I am.
You know how Dr.
Smith is.
He can't shift for himself.
Well, he's a grown man, Will.
He has to learn about responsibility.
Without us to lean on, I think he's gonna learn rapidly.
Here he is now.
I took the liberty of borrowing a rifle.
However, if you would prefer that I ventured forth into the unknown without any protection whatsoever, I'll leave it here.
You're more than welcome to it, Dr.
Smith.
You're extremely generous, sir.
Dr.
Smith I, uh-- I packed you some food.
Thank you, but I cannot accept.
What I am being forced to do, I must do alone and without aid of any kind.
Well it's time for my exile.
I'll take leave of you now.
There's absolutely no use pleading or protesting.
I've made my decision.
Take care of yourself, Doctor.
Bless you for the thought, my boy.
Well farewell.
Good luck, sir.
Take your elbows off the table, dear.
Will.
- What are you doing up this late? - I just couldn't sleep, Dad.
- Worried about Dr.
Smith? - Are you sure he'll be all right, sir? He's probably fast asleep right now.
Uh, which is where you should be.
- Good night.
- Night, Dad.
[ Animal Chittering .]
[ Chittering Continues .]
Who's out there? Who's out there? I say.
Come out or I'll shoot.
[ Cackling .]
If only this night would come to an end.
I know I won't sleep a wink.
- No! - Hi, Dr.
Smith.
- No! - Hi, Dr.
Smith.
Oh, Will.
You startled me.
- I brought you some breakfast.
- Ah.
Most kind of you, my boy.
[ Exhales .]
But as an expert woodsman, I find no difficulty living off the land.
I, uh, dined very well last night.
It's only some fresh baked rolls and jam.
Despite the fact that I'm not particularly hungry I cannot see good food wasted.
I'll force myself to eat.
Mmm.
- Mmm, that's good.
- Did you have a good night? Splendid.
Slept like a baby without a care in the world.
Dad said you'd be fine.
You didn't pick too good a spot for a camp, though.
I didn't? What's wrong with it? For one thing, it's downhill.
If it rains, you'll be flooded.
Oh.
Mmm.
Regretfully, breakfast is over.
- What are you doing, Will? - Getting you packed.
- We've gotta find a new campsite.
- An excellent suggestion, my boy.
Together we will venture forth into the wilderness.
- Come along.
Forward! - Hup, two, three, four.
- Hup, two.
Hup, two.
- Hup, two, three, four.
Hup, two.
Hup, two.
Well, this seems to be a suitable spot.
I don't think you'll find any water here.
All I want at this moment is some rest.
Come on, Dr.
Smith.
We'll find the right campsite soon.
I certainly hope so.
Dr.
Smith, look! It's the wreck of an old spaceship.
I'll bet it crashed here centuries ago.
- Let's go explore it.
- Some other time, Will.
We still have to find a place for me to live, remember.
Isn't that a place for you to live? I seriously doubt it.
However, uh, let's have a look.
After you, my boy.
I wonder what happened to its occupants.
Considering our past experiences with aliens I prefer not to conjecture.
Hardly what I would call home sweet home.
It won't be so bad after you clean it up some.
I wonder where that door leads to.
There's only one way to find out.
Try it.
It's jammed tight.
No matter.
Well, shall we put my new house in order? I'd like to stay, but I have to be getting back.
Yes, I suppose you do.
But, uh, you can stay a few minutes longer, can't you? - Nobody knows I'm here.
- Just a little while? And you won't have to work.
I'll do it, and you can watch.
- All right.
- My dear boy you have the soul of an angel.
Now, you just make yourself comfortable and I'll start putting things to rights.
- I might as well lend you a hand.
- You're a good chap.
Let's start with the bedroll, shall we? There we are.
There we are.
Now, roll it out.
That's a good boy, Will.
I wonder what that is.
It doesn't look broken at all.
Who knows or cares.
Throw it away.
Hey, Dr.
Smith, how do I look? Like the school dunce at Halloween.
Now, stop wasting time.
Oh.
You know, Will I could eat a few more of those rolls you brought me for breakfast.
I wouldn't mind having something to eat myself.
[ Electronic Whirring .]
Look! It seems to be some sort of alien food.
Where did it come from? Oh, no.
That couldn't be.
Dr.
Smith, the machine couldn't have had anything to do with getting that food, could it? We're on a planet where anything is possible, Will.
I wonder if we dare to try it again.
Will, think of something you'd like to have more than anything else.
- I don't know.
There are a lot of things.
- Concentrate on one of them.
Well, I'd like to have a bicycle but the ground's not smooth here.
And I've been wanting a photographic microscope.
Apples! That's what I like most.
- Like the kind we have at home.
- All right.
Think about apples.
- Hard! - I sure would like some apples.
It's the real thing! My boy we have a wonderful instrument in our possession.
However, until we've fully explored the full potential of this miraculous machine, we must tell no one.
I don't understand.
Eat some apples, my boy.
Eat as many as you wish.
Before we reveal our find, we must be sure there's no danger involved.
When we are satisfied, then we'll tell all the others.
- Are you sure, Doctor? - Absolutely.
Believe me, I'm doing this for the good of all of us.
And remember, this is to be our little secret.
Eat the apples, my boy.
- An apple! - Is it real? - It seems to be.
- But we don't grow apples.
Where did it come from? I found it in Will's room.
- Where did he get it? - I don't know.
But I intend to find out.
Sorry I'm late.
Well, don't let it happen again, dear.
- Here.
You can help yourself.
- Thanks, but I'm not very hungry.
He's sick.
Maybe he's, uh-- Maybe he's full of apples.
You wanna tell us about it? - I can't.
- Can't? I-It's a secret between me and Dr.
Smith.
Oh, I see.
Uh, you gave him your word? No, sir, but it's understood between us.
If you didn't give your word, you're not violating a confidence.
Especially when it concerns Smith.
All right.
I guess I'd better start at the beginning.
Dr.
Smith and I were looking for a new campsite when we found this wrecked spaceship.
- A what? - A wrecked spaceship.
Fill my cup till it runneth over.
Cease and desist! Nectar of the gods.
To the good life, my mechanical magician.
- Hi, Doctor.
- William.
What a delightful surprise.
Where have you been keeping yourself? - I've been sort of busy, sir.
- Well, you're here now, and that's all that matters.
- Come closer.
Come closer.
- Golly! A few simple conveniences quite necessary for survival in the wilderness.
I had to tell my father about the machine, Dr.
Smith.
Oh? No harm done.
I would have informed him myself eventually.
Now, uh, what about a piece of delicious French pastry? Can't make up your mind? I was just thinking about Penny and Judy and everyone else.
- So? - It wouldn't be fair for me to have cake when they couldn't.
A noble gesture, but hardly realistic.
There.
Here, my boy.
Dessert for tonight's dinner.
- Compliments of Zachary Smith.
- Thank you, sir.
You know, Will, I've missed you.
It's been very lonely here without you.
- You could have come to see me.
- I've been banished, remember? Is that the only reason you stayed away? - I don't quite follow you.
- You said all you wanted to do was check out the machine.
That's exactly what I've been doing.
For four days? Well, you see, science is a matter of, uh, trial and error.
I had to be sure there was no danger.
Have you found any? There are certain problems.
But as soon as they're ironed out-- - When will that be? - Eventually, my boy.
Eventually.
What you really mean is never, don't you, sir? Now, Will, what a thing to say.
I fully intend to bring the machine to the family.
Don said now that you had the machine, you didn't need us anymore.
Surely you don't believe that.
He said all you cared about was yourself.
- That's not true.
- Then why are you keeping the machine? I don't think I want the pastry anymore.
I sorta lost my appetite for it.
And I'm sure the rest of the family would feel the same way.
Good-bye, sir.
Will.
Will! Wait a moment.
[ Sighs .]
You still thinking about Dr.
Smith? Try to forget him, Will.
He's really not worth the effort.
I know he was always doing things that were wrong but underneath, I like him.
- That's all.
- A most flattering remark, William.
Well, isn't anyone gonna welcome the prodigal's return? - What do you want? - Now, is that a way to greet Santa Claus? Particularly when he has gifts for you all.
You mean you're gonna give us the machine, Doctor? It was always my intention.
You misjudged me, Will.
Now, wait a minute.
There's a catch in this somewhere.
From you, I expect suspicion.
However, I'm about to do something for you that will dispel all your petty doubts.
And what would that be? With the aid of this incredible machine I'm going to create another complete Jupiter 2 which will carry us safely through the heavens and back to Earth.
Gee.
This will be an absolute triumph.
Only my superior intellect, combined with this machine Only my superior intellect, combined with this machine could accomplish such a monumental feat.
Stand back, everyone.
I wouldn't want you to be crushed when it materializes.
Bring me another complete Jupiter 2.
Bring me another complete Jupiter 2.
Appear! There.
It wasn't easy, but-- There's nothing there.
I can't understand it.
It's always worked before.
Very good, Dr.
Smith.
Now, have you any other fairy tales to tell us? Look! I guess you didn't think big enough.
Apparently, the machine's capacity is limited.
However, let us all remember good things come in small packages.
Traitor.
Thought impulses are picked up by the headset and transformed into high sonaric electrical waves.
Then what's the procedure? Sonaric waves are then fused with the radioactive center in the machine.
What causes the thought process to materialize into reality? Cannot compute.
Programming data insufficient.
How our little miracle worker functions is of no importance.
It works, and that's all that interests me.
- I know how the machine works.
- You do, huh? Yes.
It's exactly like an Aladdin's lamp only instead of rubbing it, you just think of what you want.
We're trying to find a scientific explanation, and you give us fairy tales.
It's a thought translator.
That's what it is.
The trouble with you, William Robinson, is you have no imagination.
I don't care what you say.
It's still a wishing machine.
Theory and conjecture.
Nonsense and jabberwocky.
We have the gift horse.
Let us not examine its mouth too closely.
Well, did you find out anything? Only how abysmally ignorant we are.
Well, if you've finished with the machine, I'd like to borrow it.
I want to wish up something, uh, extra special for supper.
An excellent idea, Mrs.
Robinson.
The machine hasn't been used today, so there's really no problem.
What do you mean, "no problem"? Well, for some reason, the Aladdin's lamp as Penny called it, functions only twice a day.
Oh, really? I thought it could be used over and over.
Aren't two miracles a day sufficient? Go ahead, my dear.
Order your dinner.
Unless, of course Professor Robinson would like to have the first wish.
No, no.
You go on ahead.
Uh, I'm afraid I'm a practical man.
Somehow I don't believe that you can get something for nothing.
[ Metal Clanking .]
[ Clears Throat .]
[ Don .]
Is that you, Will? Hand me a power wrench, will ya? Um, why don't you come out and get it, Don? Oh! I mean, wow.
Where did you get that dress? - Do you like it? - Like it? Like I said, wow.
- I got it through the thought machine.
- Oh? And, uh, now you can take me for a walk.
It was Judy's turn yesterday.
It's mine today! All you want are some goofy tape recordings.
All you want is some icky piece of equipment.
Science is more important than music! If it weren't for arts, there wouldn't be any science! As Dr.
Smith would say, nonsense and double nonsense! Now, stop it a minute! Will, stop it! Just don't tug anymore.
Now, wait.
Now, wait a minute.
Now, we-- Now, we both can't use the machine.
- So why don't we let Dad decide? - All right by me.
- Well, you go ask him.
- I'll be right back.
- And don't you go anywhere.
- Oh, don't worry.
I won't.
[ Electronic Whirring .]
I would like some new tape recordings.
Oh! She tricked me.
Just as soon as I left, she used the thought machine.
And you think that Penny should be punished for this outrage? I sure do.
Maybe she should lose her turn a couple of times.
That would teach her a good lesson.
That sounds like a good idea, Will, but, uh, there's just one thing wrong with it.
There'd more than likely be a fight among the family for who gets Penny's turns.
She was listening to her tapes.
You should hear them, Dad.
They're absolutely wonderful.
Bach and Mozart and Beethoven.
Well, I won't argue with your choice, but, uh do you have anything there by Deceit? Deceit? I don't think I've ever heard of that composer.
Perhaps you don't recognize the name.
Uh maybe these names will help-- Cheat, Lie, Trick.
- Do you recognize the composer, or do I have to go on? - No, sir.
Come here, Penny.
I'm very disappointed in you.
You've sacrificed your moral principles for something material.
You lost far more than you gained.
- Do you understand what I'm saying? - Yes, sir, and I'm very sorry.
Then I don't have to tell you I don't ever want you to do that again.
Here come Judy and Don.
- You wanted to talk to them too.
- Yes, I do.
Sit down, Penny.
- Hi.
- What's going on? - We're having a family conference.
Join us.
- Uh-huh.
- Hey, Will.
- Hi, Don.
I suppose you've put the new repressor on the Chariot.
- Well, I-- - It was my fault.
I asked Don to take me for a walk.
You were supposed to be working in the hydroponic garden.
And, Will, weren't you supposed to be helping Don? Well, does anyone care to make a comment? All right, then.
I will.
And it can be summed up in three words-- the thought machine.
I guess maybe we've all been relying on it too much, John, but-- But why work when the machine can do it for you? Will, up to now, this family's been getting along very well.
We have respect and love for one another.
And you cannot wish for those things with that.
And then we get this machine that makes dreams come true.
And instead of making us happier it sows the seeds of discontent, mistrust and indolence.
I said a machine that makes dreams come true.
Nightmares can also be dreams.
I'm afraid your services will be severely curtailed, my mechanical friend.
- The thought machine has made you obsolete.
- Obsolete.
Old-fashioned.
Outmoded.
- No longer in fashion.
- Exactly.
However, you may still be utilized as a menial or a servant, perhaps.
Ah, Professor Robinson.
You have the thought machine.
Is there something you want? There definitely is.
- And what is that? - I want you to get rid of it.
Are you suggesting that I destroy our Garden of Eden? If you don't, I will.
You'll do no such thing.
I won't allow it.
I don't think you have any choice, Dr.
Smith.
This machine is mine.
You have no right to harm it.
- I do when it endangers our welfare.
- Very well.
Then I'll take it away.
I'll go back to the old derelict.
That, of course, is your privilege.
I'll leave in the morning.
And if you don't mind, I'll take the Robot with me as a servant companion.
Your precious machine can supply all the companionship you need.
The Robot stays here.
Who needs them? I can get along by myself.
Refusing to give me the Robot.
Indeed! I can get along without him too.
[ Chuckles .]
I have the thought machine, and I can have anything I want.
All I have to do is think-- and poof! [ Giggles .]
It's mine.
Ah.
To you, Mona.
Ahhh.
[ Sighs .]
[ Sighs .]
[ Sighs .]
[ Sighs .]
I would like some coffee, but I'm too tired.
[ Sighs .]
Of course, if I had a servant-- I say, Zachary, would you like a servant? Yes, Zachary.
You would like a servant.
- I'd like a servant to bring me some coffee.
- [ Electronic Whirring .]
Why are you still blinking? You heard my command.
I'd like a servant to bring me some coffee.
[ Creaking .]
Coffee.
Two lumps.
Two lumps.
[ Screams .]
Get away from me.
Get away! I did ask for a servant to bring me some coffee.
Well this promises to be very interesting.
I'll have a bit of cream with those two lumps.
You may serve me now.
I said, you may serve me now.
How dare you disobey.
Don't forget.
I created you.
I'm the master, and you are the servant.
[ Moaning .]
You want the machine? [ Moaning .]
Oh, no.
It's mine! I don't understand it.
An hour ago, this fruit was perfectly fresh.
- Is the perma-food unit still working? - Yes, it's working well.
But even if it had stopped working, the fruit wouldn't go bad that quickly.
Well, there must be some logical explanation.
Mother.
Look at me.
This is the dress I got from Dr.
Smith's machine.
- Oh, Judy.
- Another thing from the thought machine gone bad.
[ Sobbing .]
And Penny's new tapes-- They won't play either.
I'll bet everything we got from that thought machine is no longer usable.
Oh, Mother.
[ Sobbing .]
[ Moaning .]
[ Moaning .]
Not that I'm sorry it happened.
I'd just like to know why.
Maybe everything we thought of had a time limit.
Then why did everything go sour at once? When things go bad for no logical reason, I've always got an answer-- - Smith.
- I hope nothing happened to him.
- Don't worry about him, Will.
The bad penny always turns up.
- [ Smith .]
Help! Help! - Here he is now.
- Help! Help! I've got to turn on the force field.
[ Electrical Hum .]
- Now at least we're safe.
- Safe from what? Dad! Don! [ Moaning .]
What's he doing? He seems to be asking for something.
[ Moaning .]
He wants my machine.
Can you imagine anything more unreasonable? - Perhaps you'd better explain what this is all about.
- I haven't the slightest idea.
- And this time I'm definitely not at fault.
- That I don't believe.
[ Dr.
Smith .]
All I did was ask for a servant to bring me some coffee.
- Hardly an impossible demand.
- [ John .]
Then what happened? Then, for some strange reason the thought machine didn't function.
Instead, this-- this creature appeared and its attitude was decidedly hostile.
What happened to the thought machine? It's hidden in a safe place.
Smith, I want you to give the alien what it wants.
I will not.
The machine is mine, and I intend to keep it.
Very well, Dr.
Smith.
Don.
- Turn off the force field.
- Right.
[ John .]
Hey! That alien has no quarrel with us.
His argument's with you.
So I suggest that you settle it.
- I'm shutting off the force field.
- No.
Wait.
I'll give up the machine.
I thought your good judgment would prevail.
- First thing tomorrow morning-- - Now! But that thing is still out there.
No, it's not, Doctor.
It's gone.
He's hiding, waiting for us.
I know it.
I know it.
I'm turning it off.
- [ Electrical Hum .]
- You're making a mistake.
We'll be destroyed.
We're going.
We shouldn't be long, but keep the force field on till we get back.
I will.
- [ Switch Clicks .]
- [ Electrical Hum .]
Please, let's turn back before it's too late.
We're getting the machine.
- The machine is in there.
- Will, get it.
Here it is.
Here it is.
I've, uh-- I've given the matter some additional thought and I've decided to keep the machine in my possession after all.
Uh, one of these days soon, we'll be returning to Earth, and this machine-- Is going back to the derelict spaceship where the alien can find it.
[ Electronic Warble .]
Look at this.
[ John .]
He's here.
Don't make any sudden moves.
Keep calm.
[ Moaning .]
He wants the machine, Dr.
Smith.
- Give it to him.
- I won't.
He'll kill me.
I said give it to him! Will, you take it.
[ Moaning .]
[ Moaning .]
He didn't harm me.
He didn't harm me.
[ Creaking .]
That vindictive creature.
He took everything back! He must still be in there.
- Will, don't! - Will! He's gone, and I couldn't be happier.
The alien meant only good.
Dad, I don't understand.
Why did the alien give us things and then decide to take them back? Because Dr.
Smith asked for too much.
You know, he could have had anything he wanted.
But like most people, it wasn't enough.
He wanted more.
When he tried to create a slave, the alien realized this.
That vindictive creature.
He would have stayed, Doctor.
We made him leave because we were selfish.
[ Electronic Whirring .]
He must have really heard me! All personnel will leave launchpad area immediately.
All personnel will leave launchpad area immediately.
Launchpad area clear.
Why can't we watch from outside? That rocket may be small, but there's enough hyper-energy fuel in there for a real blast.
Commence final countdown.
- Ten, nine, eight-- - I hope somebody finds your message this time.
- Seven, six-- - One of them's bound to land somewhere.
- This better be it.
It's your sixth try.
- Five four, three two, one.
Liftoff.
When will the rockets fire? - At 1,000 feet automatically.
- Is that when the pull of gravity ends? No.
But every bit helps.
You're learning.
What do you mean, "learning"? I know all about gravity.
Come on.
Let go see what my balloon's doing to it.
Space probe altitude-- 200 feet.
[ Robot .]
Space probe altitude--300 feet.
It won't be long now.
Where do you think it'll land? Shipwrecked sailors don't know where their bottles'll land when they toss them into the ocean.
They just hope somebody finds them and gets the message.
[ Robot .]
Space probe altitude--500 feet.
Space probe altitude-- 700 feet.
It'll fire any second now.
Space probe altitude-- 900 feet.
Space probe altitude-- 1,000 feet.
What's holding it? Warning.
Warning.
- [ Robot .]
It's coming this way.
- It's coming this way! [ Robot .]
Space probe out of control.