Malibu Rescue (2019) s01e01 Episode Script

The Flounders.
A ragtag team of rejects from the Valley assembled for one reason and one reason only.
To fail.
But they didn't fail.
They didn't exactly succeed, but they didn't fail.
Thanks to a technicality, they passed the Junior Rescue Training.
Now, they'll be protecting the beaches of Malibu from Tower Two.
Tyler, the wise guy with the great hair.
Gina the tough one.
Lizzie.
Spunky, with a dark side.
Dylan, the captain with a lot to prove.
Eric, the heart of the group.
And Tyler Hold on.
- You already said Tyler.
- I did? You started with him.
It's way too much Tyler.
I think it's exactly the right amount of me.
Of course you do.
"Spunky with a dark side"? I don't see it.
Oh! Did I tell you? This weekend, My dad was mowing the lawn in his bare feet and he cut off three toes.
I asked the doctor if I could sew one on and he said maybe next time.
I really hope there's a next time! Oh.
"Spunky with a dark side.
" I hear it now.
Yo, Eric, I can't believe you made this.
Where'd you get the footage? Vooch shot it.
I also do weddings and bar mitzvahs.
Hi! Guys, squeeze in.
I wanna get a pic of your first day as official Malibu Junior Rescue.
Everybody say, "Who's driving?" Who's driving? Wait, who is driving? Where are they? Please, please, please, don't be late on our first day! Oh, hey, Dylan! Where's your "team"? You know I thought I smelled Valley trash earlier, but it turns out I was just walking by the dumpster.
That's funny! You know, they're on their way.
Be here any second.
Boop-boop! Oh, just got a text.
- They're right around the corner.
- Did you just say, "boop-boop"? No, that's the sound my phone makes when I get a text.
Oh, hang on, I gotta respond.
- Click, click, click, click, click - Your phone is wack.
Just admit it, Dylan.
You can't handle being a captain.
Garvin should have never given you a tower.
Hey, guys! Ready to save some lives? Oh! Can you say it again? Eric's head was in the way.
Vooch has been filming us for weeks without our knowledge.
Oh, that's troubling.
All right, all right, I'm coming.
I'll be right there.
I'm so proud of you guys.
Aw! Kill it today, okay? No, wait! Save it.
You can't park there! You guys, you're here! You're officially Malibu Junior Rescue! - Yeah! - Yeah! Now what? Malibu Beach.
Twenty-seven miles of the most beautiful coast in the world, and it's our job to protect all of it.
From the beach, from the water, from the air From space! Not space.
That's not really our jurisdiction.
All right! Welcome to the first day of Malibu Beach Junior Rescue! Come on! In the house! Now listen.
Our job is about more than just hangin' out at our towers and lookin' pretty.
But some of us can't help it.
Am I right, Tower One? Come on.
Junior Rescue also gets assignments each morning, and I'm the one in charge of handing them out.
Most are dope.
Some are super lame.
But they all gotta get done.
So get pumped, Tower One, because I gave us ATV Patrol.
Come on! Everybody else check the board.
Let's go! I wonder what assignment we got! This is an official Junior Rescue assignment? I thought we were gonna rescue swimmers, scan for sharks, run in slow motion.
- You know, cool stuff.
- And we will.
Well, not run in slow motion.
Nobody can do that.
But for right now, we have to focus on the assignment we got, and keeping the beach clean is important.
I know it's not exciting or glamorous.
You guys, I just checked Instagram, and Jiffpom was here, like, five minutes ago! Any one of these piles could be his! Is it just me, or are there a surprising amount of turds on this beach? Come on.
Didn't want you guys to get bored, so I restocked the beach for you, losers.
He borrowed three dogs just to mess with us, and we're losers.
Yes, I did.
- I'm gonna handle this.
- Tyler, stop.
Okay? it's not worth it.
Just ignore him.
Oh, hey, uh, watch your step, 'cause Tiger here ate a block of cheddar earlier, and it is not agreeing with him.
Oh, not one bit.
All right, have fun.
That was some good poopin', you guys! Yes, it was.
I hate that guy.
Hand sanitizer for you, and you and you, and me.
Lizzie, you want in on this? No, thanks, I'm good.
Usually I think my mom's crazy for packing things like this but I'm lovin' it right now.
- Uh, Dylan, can you do my back? - Yeah.
Ugh! Well, thanks to Brody, now I have to burn these.
- What's his problem? - He's just trying to get to us.
- Well, it's working.
- Look, Dylan, you're our tower captain.
- You have to do something.
- I am.
I'm gonna take us back to our tower, and we're gonna forget all about Brody and focus on saving lives.
Come on, guys, let's go.
There's my least favorite tower.
Got a couple more jobs for you, guys.
But we already did all our assignments.
Yeah, I know, but a couple slipped through the cracks, and it's up to me to make sure they get done by you.
Buoy maintenance? Swim fin disinfection? It's almost like someone's giving us the worst jobs on purpose.
Yeah, it is, isn't it? That's not fair.
But, it is hilarious.
What can I say? When you guys humiliated us in front of the mayor, you started a war.
You're punishing us because we saved a life? Doy! Uh What did you think was gonna happen? I don't know, we'd be praised for our heroism and welcomed among you? Well, joke's on you, brah.
You'll never be one of us.
We all agree we gotta take that guy down, right? No, we all agree that no matter what Brody throws at us, we're gonna do such a great job that even he'll have to admit we belong here.
I can't believe I'm saying this right now, but Dylan's right.
We want people to respect us, we have to earn it.
Yes, exactly! Take the high road.
Come on, team.
Let's go scrape barnacles off the buoys.
Taking the high road sucks.
We earned our spot here, and you're gonna let him ruin our summer? Forget that.
We gotta fight fire with fire.
What does that even mean? It means we gotta prank Brody so hard that he'll never mess with us again.
Tyler, everybody already thinks we don't deserve to be here! If we go after Brody instead of doing our job, it'll just prove them right.
I'm your captain, and I say we scrape buoys.
And I will, as soon as I'm done shutting Brody up.
Trust me.
Tyler! I can't believe him! Can you believe him? Actually, I gotta go with Tyler on this one.
I mean, it's classic first day of kindergarten.
Find the biggest kid on theyard and take her to knuckle town.
Then everybody knows you're no one's punk.
Sorry, Dylan! This is crazy! Pretty much.
Right, there's gotta be something in here I can use to prank Brody.
Ooh, hello.
Speargun.
This will totally shut him up.
Uh, maybe something less permanent.
Okay Tyler? Tyler, are you in here? Over here.
I wanna help get back at Brody.
Whoa! Is it bad? It's horrible.
Then why are you smiling? 'Cause I get to take 'em out.
No, no, no.
No, no, no, no.
I'm good.
I'm good.
I'm good.
Hey.
We went ahead and grouped the buoys into piles.
That's yours, that's Tyler's, that's Lizzie's.
Where are those guys? They promised me they'd be right back as soon as they finished doing the thing I told them not to do.
So you just let them go? No, I didn't let them.
They just didn't listen.
Hey, that's not right.
We're a team.
We can't accomplish anything unless we're together.
- I'll go get them.
- No, wait! Seriously? We can't be a team if everyone keeps leaving.
- Why is nobody listening to me? - Don't beat yourself up.
It's not your fault the team doesn't respect you.
What, you think the team doesn't respect me? - You think they do? - I did.
Oh Well, they don't.
I ran out of bandages, so I had to get creative.
Thanks, Lizzie.
Uh, missed one.
Okay.
Let's just get the supplies to prank Brody.
Ooh, grab that rope.
I have an idea.
Somebody's coming.
We're not supposed to be in here.
Hide! Uh Hi, Eric.
They're alive? I'm sorry about the mouth-to-mouth.
I'd never done it before! I didn't know you weren't supposed to use tongue! Eric it's me.
I knew that.
You guys, Dylan, Gina, and I have been doing all the work.
You gotta come help.
We are helping.
We're getting Brody to back off.
But Dylan said Dylan wants us to do this.
Then why did she tell you not to? Think about it.
She's the captain.
She can't tell us to break the rules.
But she doesn't like Brody any more than we do.
- I don't know - Well, I do! - Tyler? Where are you? - Let's just say I didn't jump into a bin full of fish hooks and I definitely didn't do it twice.
Yes, he did.
Then, how am I supposed to get everyone to respect me as the captain? First, stop asking questions like that.
Captains don't ask.
Okay, let's say you were captain.
How would you You're asking again.
When was the last time anybody cleaned these things? Half my team has bailed on me, Brody thinks I'm a joke Maybe I'm not cut out for this.
Gross.
You're right.
Doubting yourself is gross! But how can I not? I mean, I've been here three summers.
I know Junior Rescue inside and out.
I even made captain.
Everyone still walks all over me.
You better figure it out fast, 'cause we're the only ones working, and these fins are disgusting.
Ew! What is that? Eel barf? Something in here just moved! What is that? Wait.
Those look like tentacles.
Is that what I think it is? Whoa.
You guys know you got stuff all over your face, right? That's it! I'm not doing this all summer! I'm taking him down.
Gina, wait! When Brody comes back to Tower One, he'll step into this net.
Which is attached to that parasail.
All of which is attached to that Polaris.
I'll drive off, dragging Brody across Dog Beach, the parasail will open, lifting him into the air and out over the ocean.
Then we'll release the rope, and kersploosh! You can say "kersploosh, kersplat, kersplunk.
" It's still a ker-felony! This is crazy! Is it crazy or is it crazy? I'm not hearing the difference.
- Eric, we're doing this for the team.
- What team? Ever since you decided to prank Brody, we haven't been a team.
Somebody had to do something.
Dylan didn't have a plan.
Yes, she did.
You just didn't give it a chance.
You ignored her.
I didn't mean to.
Well, you did.
It's our first day, and we're already falling apart.
Don't you get it? This is exactly what Brody wants.
You're right.
Are you serious? We're bailing? Yeah.
We should be helping our team.
I'll take the Polaris back.
Follow me, and you guys untie the net.
There.
Fine.
Take it apart.
I wanna help you take down Brody.
No, no, no, no, no! I just talked them out of it.
"Cleaning the outhouses.
" Sounds like a Tower Two job to me.
What the Help me! There's dog poo in my hair! Things like this don't happen to Brody! - Whoa! - Help me! Yes, it worked! Uh, which is very bad.
Wait! No, Tyler! We didn't untie the net! Help! What's going on? Help me! Oh, no! Oh, I can see my tower from up here.
Ow, my boat key.
What did you guys do? Nothing! I thought we agreed we weren't gonna pull the prank.
Why'd you make it so dangerous? - That's what I said.
- It was Lizzie's idea.
- Which worked beautifully, by the way.
- Enough! You guys have been ignoring me all day, and that ends now! I'm the captain.
You're gonna do what Isay, how I say it, when I say it.
- You got a problem with that? - No.
No what? No, Captain! Tyler, Gina, we need something in case he falls.
Lizzie, Eric, grab some rappelling gear and meet me at the Polaris.
Come on, guys, let's go! Once I hook the net, pull him up with the winch.
Why is this happening? Help me! Help me! Help! Help! Ow! Brody, calm down, we're gonna save you.
You're running this rescue? Oh, great.
I'm dead.
Will you stop? I got this.
Please! Someone! Anybody else! Tower Two is the worst! What are you doing? You're gonna leave us alone for the rest of the summer.
No, I'm not! Whoa! Wait, wait, what are you doing? Are you crazy? - Stop it! - I will.
If you stop giving us bad assignments.
It has to be fair from now on.
But I want to ruin your summer.
Okay, fine, fine! Fine! I'll stop, I'll stop.
Just please Please get me out of here.
Get ready to pull him up! Never mind! I can't believe we blew that up by mouth.
- Why isn't there a pump for this thing? - There is.
We just don't have an extension cord.
She cut the rope! She's insane! She cut the rope! Who does that? Ow! I fell on my whistle.
Yo, Dylan, I can't believe you dropped him.
That was hardcore.
You are crazy.
No, she's crazy.
Still don't hear it.
Come on.
That was a surprisingly baller move.
Well, I'm a surprisingly baller lady.
Don't worry.
I won't tell them it was an accident.
Thanks.
They're totally worshiping me right now.
Hey, Dylan.
You're right.
You're our captain, and maybe there's kind of a possibility that I should have listened to you today.
Is there anything you wanna say to me? I agree.
You should've listened to me.
Come on, let's finish our assignments.
Uh, I'm not going near those swim fins.
An octopus peed on me today.
Please tell me you washed your hands.
I did not.
Hope you don't mind.
I gotta make a quick stop at Adam Schwartzman's bar mitzvah before I take you guys home.
I'm Adam.
Today I became a man.
Put that arm around me, and you won't be one for long.
Hey, guys.
Does anyone know where we're going? I'm not lost.
But I might be.