Maniac (2014) s01e04 Episode Script
Episode 4
1 What's the deal with not having TVs in the rooms? Hello! TVs come with one remote control.
For you to decide what you want to watch.
If everybody should decide, they would come with 20 remotes.
So, what's your name? James? What a novel American name! Hello.
Yesterday I was sitting there, relaxing.
A guy with hydrocephalus came in.
What on earth is he doing? I think he's become a comedian.
Mina? Isaksen -Isaksen from C Ward will stop by.
-Why? -What do you think? -He's not being transferred, is he? Listen.
Espen is dangerous.
Sooner or later this will go wrong.
He's responding more and more.
You've turned him into your personal project.
I can't take that into account.
I really mean it.
-Have you talked to his father? -Of course I've talked to his father.
He trusts our judgment.
Let Isaksen make an evaluation, then we'll take it from there.
OK? -I think we should -Splendid.
My name is Espen! See you all at the bar! Espen, this is serious.
Isaksen is coming to observe you.
You risk being transferred to a closed ward.
(Mina:) Which neither of us wants.
Espen! I know you can hear me.
I know I can help you, but you have to Come in! -Who's this? -The appraiser.
The appraiser? But he would only come if -Am I moving? -Didn't I tell you? When was this decided? I don't wanna move! Are you here to stress the patient? No.
I've been summoned because he got naked in the common room.
He's ran away from his room repeatedly.
And he tried to rip Lindberg's face off.
For your sake we have to assess whether he's a danger to the others.
He's at a stage where every experience feels critical.
Not long ago he could not deal with reality at all.
Could you get him back in so we can assess- -if he belongs on C Ward or not? Espen! Think about it! (HÃ¥kon:) You and me on C Ward! Without Mina's nagging.
-What? Are we moving to Florida? -Oh yes! The C State! The C State? I didn't know it was called that.
The vitamin C state.
Florida has 261 days of sunshine a year.
-Their oranges are C bombs.
-I see.
The C State is the healthiest place to live.
Isn't Florida the place where old people go to die? Why do you think there are so many elderly in Florida? Because they don't die! Of course you want to move there! Sunshine, heat, the good life! And as a bonus, no more of Mina's nagging.
Speak of the devil.
Espen, we gotta talk! -Are you moving? -How did you know? -The appraise is outside.
-He's not, is he? Let's get down to business.
I'm considering selling in case HÃ¥kon and I want to move to Florida.
What? Florida? With HÃ¥kon? Are you gay or something? -Gay? We're not gay.
-It's okay to be gay.
But please don't move! Don't mind me.
I'll be sitting over here.
Just go on about your business.
Are you appraising? Yes, I'm going to measure the humidity in this crack.
That's one hell of a crack.
You don't need a meter to check the humidity in that crack.
-Are you a comedian or something? -Are you kidding? Everybody knows! Time Magazine recently named him "World's Funniest Man".
Don't make fun of him.
You want to get a good appraisal.
-He's not selling.
He's staying here.
-No, he's moving to Florida! No, he's not moving to Florida.
Only old men go there.
Old men? Old ladies move to Florida too! What is it so important to point out that there are ladies in Florida? I'm not gay! -We're moving to Florida! -You're not selling.
Shut up! What a scream-o-rama! Tell Isaksen how you've been lately.
-I won't stay if you keep nagging.
-But you like it here.
Sure I'm fine.
Florida is fine too.
Next stop: C State! OK, let's put a smile on his face.
Give the appraiser a drink.
We can do this! We're going to Florida! Florida! Florida! Florida! Snap out of it.
-I won't go if you keep nagging.
-Yes! Yes! Yes! Next stop: Right here.
Stop making a fool of yourself.
The appraiser and I will handle this man to man.
Espen? Please focus.
Hi, I'm Espen.
Are you Isaksen? Nice to meet you.
I'll tell you straight: I don't want to move.
I like it here.
There's no point for you to be here.
But I know why you came.
There's been a lot of mess lately.
But I'm doing fine.
That's good.
I'm glad to hear it.
Thanks for coming.
Espen Damn it Finally I could have had it made.
-You can have it made here too.
-Never.
It's the story of my life! I'm getting older, I'm bald, and I'm wearing an all-weather jacket.
Have I ever had it made? But it's always been like that.
You won't stop being bald if we move.
No, but Florida women like bald men.
90 % of them date bald men! That's because 90 % of all men in Florida are bald senior citizens.
-Yes, yes, yes -Listen No! You chose the girl and dumped your buddy.
Come on! Are you playing the pity card? -Is it working? -Oh no.
It's working! Blimey, it's working! The pity card is working.
We're moving to Florida after all! Florida! Florida! Florida! We'll be fine.
Cleaning! Cleaning? I didn't even know I had a cleaner! I booked one to boost the value of the apartment.
Great! - I have to talk to the appraiser.
-Why? -We're going to Florida! -Que? -Que pasa? -Hello there There have been a few mishaps, I won't deny that.
But I think we both agree he's making clear progress.
-Well, yes.
-We can communicate with him now.
I think we'll wait and see.
Wonderful.
We need to talk, sir! I want to move after all.
-Espen -I would like to move now! -That's not how it works.
-Come with me, sir.
I think you misunderstand why I'm here.
I made up my mind.
I'm moving! How much do I get for the apartment? -You said you wouldn't move! -That annoying noise is back! Shut up, egghead! Espen, come here.
-What's boobies in Spanish? -Why? A lot of people speak Spanish in Florida.
Here's your chance to learn.
-I see.
-Is it nachos? Mojitos? Quesadillas? Quesadillas? Que? Are you saying I'm flat like quesadillas? My sisters are big like melons! Rude boy! Burritos? Jalapenos? Quesadillas? No more cleaning! You pay now! Dineros.
Bastard! I'm sorry.
C State! C State! -He doesn't know what C Ward means.
-Obviously.
Come, quick.
Look at my bathroom.
I think we'll call it a day now.
May I have a word with you, Isaksen? She's ruining it for us! Because she doesn't want you to move.
Maybe she's right.
-Maybe we shouldn't move.
-Of course we should.
-You can't reconsider now.
-Let's wait and see.
Please! -We're moving.
Now! Florida! -Please! C State! Come on! Espen, what are you doing? Don't you want to stay here? What are you looking at? -What did you do? -That's settled then.
Espen Open the door.
Espen! Don't be silly.
Open the door! Espen Jeffery! Jeffery! Aloha! Mina has locked herself in the bathroom.
That's not my problem.
-You're the janitor.
-What can I do about it? -Get her out! -What's going on? Good! Something's happened to the door.
I can't get out.
-I'll try to get you out.
-Can you fix it? Not working.
It's locked.
I can't open it when it's locked.
That's why I called you.
The janitor can fix these things.
-Good thinking! -Go get your tools.
Espen! You're well endowed.
Are you saying that because I'm white? I'm just messing with you, buddy! Mine is just as small as yours.
But bigger than HÃ¥kon's.
Look at that screwdriver! -Can you fix it? -Sure.
What are you doing? Come on! -What's going on? -Espen -What's going on? -Give it to me.
I must open the door.
We have to get Mina out of there.
Wait, let me try Damn it.
-You okay? -I can't stand the sight of blood.
Why did you lock me in? Did Espen lock you in? -No, the door locked behind me.
-I just forgot my papers.
Come and sit down.
-It's funny.
-No.
Not you! Espen! My name is Espen! Nice to be here.
Right Isaksen! Wait! "Right"? What do you mean? -Prepare for transfer.
-No, please! -He means no harm.
-Patients are transferred every day.
-It's not the end of the world.
-Maybe for Espen.
He probably won't even notice.
I've seen all I need to see.
There is no doubt.
Is something wrong? I just spoke with Lovisenberg.
-Espen's father died this morning.
-Oh dear That won't make any difference here.
Espen is totally out of touch with reality.
Daddy? Espen Thank you.
-How sad.
-Yes, very sad.
My daddy.
My daddy.
I recently considered moving to a warmer climate.
I thought I'd get an appraiser to look at my apartment.
It was so old it wasn't an apartment, it was in fact a renovation site.
What was I thinking? An appraiser? That's like getting Tim Gunn to evaluate Dick Cheney's style.
It won't be a 10 out of 10! My name is Espen! Thank you so much!
For you to decide what you want to watch.
If everybody should decide, they would come with 20 remotes.
So, what's your name? James? What a novel American name! Hello.
Yesterday I was sitting there, relaxing.
A guy with hydrocephalus came in.
What on earth is he doing? I think he's become a comedian.
Mina? Isaksen -Isaksen from C Ward will stop by.
-Why? -What do you think? -He's not being transferred, is he? Listen.
Espen is dangerous.
Sooner or later this will go wrong.
He's responding more and more.
You've turned him into your personal project.
I can't take that into account.
I really mean it.
-Have you talked to his father? -Of course I've talked to his father.
He trusts our judgment.
Let Isaksen make an evaluation, then we'll take it from there.
OK? -I think we should -Splendid.
My name is Espen! See you all at the bar! Espen, this is serious.
Isaksen is coming to observe you.
You risk being transferred to a closed ward.
(Mina:) Which neither of us wants.
Espen! I know you can hear me.
I know I can help you, but you have to Come in! -Who's this? -The appraiser.
The appraiser? But he would only come if -Am I moving? -Didn't I tell you? When was this decided? I don't wanna move! Are you here to stress the patient? No.
I've been summoned because he got naked in the common room.
He's ran away from his room repeatedly.
And he tried to rip Lindberg's face off.
For your sake we have to assess whether he's a danger to the others.
He's at a stage where every experience feels critical.
Not long ago he could not deal with reality at all.
Could you get him back in so we can assess- -if he belongs on C Ward or not? Espen! Think about it! (HÃ¥kon:) You and me on C Ward! Without Mina's nagging.
-What? Are we moving to Florida? -Oh yes! The C State! The C State? I didn't know it was called that.
The vitamin C state.
Florida has 261 days of sunshine a year.
-Their oranges are C bombs.
-I see.
The C State is the healthiest place to live.
Isn't Florida the place where old people go to die? Why do you think there are so many elderly in Florida? Because they don't die! Of course you want to move there! Sunshine, heat, the good life! And as a bonus, no more of Mina's nagging.
Speak of the devil.
Espen, we gotta talk! -Are you moving? -How did you know? -The appraise is outside.
-He's not, is he? Let's get down to business.
I'm considering selling in case HÃ¥kon and I want to move to Florida.
What? Florida? With HÃ¥kon? Are you gay or something? -Gay? We're not gay.
-It's okay to be gay.
But please don't move! Don't mind me.
I'll be sitting over here.
Just go on about your business.
Are you appraising? Yes, I'm going to measure the humidity in this crack.
That's one hell of a crack.
You don't need a meter to check the humidity in that crack.
-Are you a comedian or something? -Are you kidding? Everybody knows! Time Magazine recently named him "World's Funniest Man".
Don't make fun of him.
You want to get a good appraisal.
-He's not selling.
He's staying here.
-No, he's moving to Florida! No, he's not moving to Florida.
Only old men go there.
Old men? Old ladies move to Florida too! What is it so important to point out that there are ladies in Florida? I'm not gay! -We're moving to Florida! -You're not selling.
Shut up! What a scream-o-rama! Tell Isaksen how you've been lately.
-I won't stay if you keep nagging.
-But you like it here.
Sure I'm fine.
Florida is fine too.
Next stop: C State! OK, let's put a smile on his face.
Give the appraiser a drink.
We can do this! We're going to Florida! Florida! Florida! Florida! Snap out of it.
-I won't go if you keep nagging.
-Yes! Yes! Yes! Next stop: Right here.
Stop making a fool of yourself.
The appraiser and I will handle this man to man.
Espen? Please focus.
Hi, I'm Espen.
Are you Isaksen? Nice to meet you.
I'll tell you straight: I don't want to move.
I like it here.
There's no point for you to be here.
But I know why you came.
There's been a lot of mess lately.
But I'm doing fine.
That's good.
I'm glad to hear it.
Thanks for coming.
Espen Damn it Finally I could have had it made.
-You can have it made here too.
-Never.
It's the story of my life! I'm getting older, I'm bald, and I'm wearing an all-weather jacket.
Have I ever had it made? But it's always been like that.
You won't stop being bald if we move.
No, but Florida women like bald men.
90 % of them date bald men! That's because 90 % of all men in Florida are bald senior citizens.
-Yes, yes, yes -Listen No! You chose the girl and dumped your buddy.
Come on! Are you playing the pity card? -Is it working? -Oh no.
It's working! Blimey, it's working! The pity card is working.
We're moving to Florida after all! Florida! Florida! Florida! We'll be fine.
Cleaning! Cleaning? I didn't even know I had a cleaner! I booked one to boost the value of the apartment.
Great! - I have to talk to the appraiser.
-Why? -We're going to Florida! -Que? -Que pasa? -Hello there There have been a few mishaps, I won't deny that.
But I think we both agree he's making clear progress.
-Well, yes.
-We can communicate with him now.
I think we'll wait and see.
Wonderful.
We need to talk, sir! I want to move after all.
-Espen -I would like to move now! -That's not how it works.
-Come with me, sir.
I think you misunderstand why I'm here.
I made up my mind.
I'm moving! How much do I get for the apartment? -You said you wouldn't move! -That annoying noise is back! Shut up, egghead! Espen, come here.
-What's boobies in Spanish? -Why? A lot of people speak Spanish in Florida.
Here's your chance to learn.
-I see.
-Is it nachos? Mojitos? Quesadillas? Quesadillas? Que? Are you saying I'm flat like quesadillas? My sisters are big like melons! Rude boy! Burritos? Jalapenos? Quesadillas? No more cleaning! You pay now! Dineros.
Bastard! I'm sorry.
C State! C State! -He doesn't know what C Ward means.
-Obviously.
Come, quick.
Look at my bathroom.
I think we'll call it a day now.
May I have a word with you, Isaksen? She's ruining it for us! Because she doesn't want you to move.
Maybe she's right.
-Maybe we shouldn't move.
-Of course we should.
-You can't reconsider now.
-Let's wait and see.
Please! -We're moving.
Now! Florida! -Please! C State! Come on! Espen, what are you doing? Don't you want to stay here? What are you looking at? -What did you do? -That's settled then.
Espen Open the door.
Espen! Don't be silly.
Open the door! Espen Jeffery! Jeffery! Aloha! Mina has locked herself in the bathroom.
That's not my problem.
-You're the janitor.
-What can I do about it? -Get her out! -What's going on? Good! Something's happened to the door.
I can't get out.
-I'll try to get you out.
-Can you fix it? Not working.
It's locked.
I can't open it when it's locked.
That's why I called you.
The janitor can fix these things.
-Good thinking! -Go get your tools.
Espen! You're well endowed.
Are you saying that because I'm white? I'm just messing with you, buddy! Mine is just as small as yours.
But bigger than HÃ¥kon's.
Look at that screwdriver! -Can you fix it? -Sure.
What are you doing? Come on! -What's going on? -Espen -What's going on? -Give it to me.
I must open the door.
We have to get Mina out of there.
Wait, let me try Damn it.
-You okay? -I can't stand the sight of blood.
Why did you lock me in? Did Espen lock you in? -No, the door locked behind me.
-I just forgot my papers.
Come and sit down.
-It's funny.
-No.
Not you! Espen! My name is Espen! Nice to be here.
Right Isaksen! Wait! "Right"? What do you mean? -Prepare for transfer.
-No, please! -He means no harm.
-Patients are transferred every day.
-It's not the end of the world.
-Maybe for Espen.
He probably won't even notice.
I've seen all I need to see.
There is no doubt.
Is something wrong? I just spoke with Lovisenberg.
-Espen's father died this morning.
-Oh dear That won't make any difference here.
Espen is totally out of touch with reality.
Daddy? Espen Thank you.
-How sad.
-Yes, very sad.
My daddy.
My daddy.
I recently considered moving to a warmer climate.
I thought I'd get an appraiser to look at my apartment.
It was so old it wasn't an apartment, it was in fact a renovation site.
What was I thinking? An appraiser? That's like getting Tim Gunn to evaluate Dick Cheney's style.
It won't be a 10 out of 10! My name is Espen! Thank you so much!