Marvin, Marvin (2012) s01e03 Episode Script

1 Hey, Henry! How are the candy sales? You win the fundraising contest? Henry? Who's Henry? I think you mean chocolate thunder.
What? Oh, so you were the top seller! Crushed it.
These chocolate bars you bought me put me way over the top.
Awesome.
Pound.
Don't forget to blow it up.
Boom.
Did I learn that just as it stopped being cool? - Oh, yeah.
- Oh, boy.
But you're still an awesome mom.
Yeah.
Thanks, bud.
Hello, family humanoids.
I was just warming my skin underneath your star.
You know what, Marvin? You are just in time.
We were about to celebrate Henry's big victory with some chocolate.
What's chocolate? You've never had chocolate before, Marvin? - Here, try this.
- Yeah.
I don't know if I like No! Whoa.
Uh, I'm gonna guess he likes it.
Yeah, you think? - Give me more! - Whoa! More chocolate! Easy, boy.
Easy.
Whoa.
Whoa! - I want it, I want it, I want it.
- Easy.
You remember, we only eat chocolate in moderation.
You remember what "moderation" means, huh? - It means - What? You eat it all at once! No.
Yeah, we're gonna have to hide this from him.
Oh, I see how it is.
You're trying to keep all the sweet brown goodness to yourself.
Fine.
But this isn't over.
Oh, hey.
It says here that the the top seller at school wins a bike? It's it's not about some stupid prize.
It's about school spirit; you know, raising money to save the arts program.
Because without art, what are we? Hey, check this out.
Look at this sweet ride somebody hid in the bushes.
It says "Chocolate thunder.
" That's the bike you won, a motorbike? It's not a motorbike.
It's a mini bike ; you know, mini for kids.
Oh, a mini bike.
Yeah, so can I ride it? No.
Not until you're 15.
- What? - Yeah.
Mom, you can't let a good mini bike go to waste.
Oh, it's not gonna go to waste.
Hey! Peace out, suckers! This is my home planet, Klooton.
These are the Klerg.
They hate Klooton.
To protect me, my parents sent me away while they stayed to fight the Klerg.
Eat it, Klerg! I landed on earth and took the form of a human.
At first, I was scared.
Fortunately, I met a very nice family.
Hello, I'm Marvin! That's how we greet people on Klooton.
It's very polite.
They agreed to raise me like their own son until the Klerg were defeated.
Now I'm living a secret life as a normal American kid.
And you can barely tell I'm different.
Well, hello, ladies.
Marvin, please.
We're trying to study.
Studying how to be pretty? Because if you are, your grade would be an "F.
" For "flawless.
" Marvin, forget it.
We don't have any chocolate in here.
How'd you know that's what I wanted? Because we can read your mind.
I don't believe you.
Do you know what I'm thinking right now? - Yes.
- Yes.
That's amazing.
All right, fun's over.
Let's get back to work.
But I hate biology.
Brianna, look, if you don't learn this stuff, you're gonna fail.
But it's not my fault.
Biology makes me go honk-shoo.
Honkshoo? You know, puts me to sleep.
Honk-shoo, honk-shoo.
Okay, you know what will really get your heart racing? Studying the heart.
Okay, it's the most vital organ in the human body.
It's made of four separate Chambers, multiple valves And now she's drooling on my biology book.
Do you know what I'm thinking right now? Yes.
Stop doing that! Hey, mom Liz.
Oh, Marvin, you are gonna love This; your first family dinner night.
Family dinner night? Mmhmm.
Which family are we eating, the one in the blue house? They look juicy.
No, Marvin.
Marvin, please.
We don't eat the neighbors.
We eat dinner together.
And we chat and catch up.
It's family bonding time.
We used to do it a lot more before everybody got so busy.
Hmm.
Well, are we gonna be eating chocolate at this dinner, maybe? No.
Come on, gang! Time for family dinner night.
Well, you know what Pop-Pop always says.
You should always eat dessert first in case, during dinner, you get struck by lightning.
PopPop used to play football without a helmet.
Don't listen to him.
- But maybe he's right.
- Whoa.
You know, maybe I should just have a little chocolate now, just nine or ten bars.
In your dreams.
I did dream about chocolate.
The chocolate bars were dancing and they were singing.
"Eat me, Marvin" But then this chocolate Bunny unwrapped itself, and the rapper was all, "Yo, this is DJ Chocolate, Ch-сh-сh-сhocolate.
" You are not having chocolate, end of discussion.
It's not fair.
You show me chocolate, it's so delicious, and now you won't let me have it? - Well - You are worse than a Klerg! That's right, I said it.
You know what? I know you don't believe me, but this is for your own good.
No, it's for my own bad! May the moons of Klooton cast a dark shadow across your galabazoid.
And trust me, Missy, that ain't a good thing.
Wow, another night with an alien brother.
Yeah, but not just any night.
It is family dinner night.
Come on, honey, grab a chair.
Oh, actually, Brianna and I are studying.
I'm just gonna grab something quick.
Yeah, but what about the dinner and the thing and the people and the Sorry, mom! Oh, hey, you ready for family dinner night, hon? Oh, sorry, hon.
I got my big Fishing trip coming up this weekend.
- Got to pack up my gear.
- Bob, uh Tell you what.
Next week, family dinner night, we're gonna eat all the fish I catch.
Yeah, but you never catch any fish on these things.
That's not true.
One time, I caught that really huge shark.
That was a child's inflatable toy.
Still caught it, all right? Fought that big fish for two hours! So have you changed your mind about chocolate for dinner? Nope.
You're mean! I'll see you later.
Wait.
Where are you going? I got a golf lesson.
I'm working on a new shot.
I hit it; it goes straight up, straight down.
I call it "the Pop-Pop flop shot.
" - You're not gonna eat anything? - Nah.
After a meal, you got to wait 30 minutes until you can go swimming.
- I thought you were playing golf.
- I hit a lot of balls in the water! I don't even know why I bother.
Have you seen grandpa? Oh, my mini bike! Got to get that back.
Oh, hey, Henry, why don't you sit down for family dinner, you know, what's left of it.
No, thanks.
Losing my mini bike made me lose my appetite.
Fine.
Fine.
You know what? If nobody wants to do family dinner night, then everyone can just fend for themselves, all righty? Fend for myself which, I'm pretty sure, means "Eat whatever you want," right? What could I possibly want for dinner? Could it be I don't know Chocolate? Come out, come out, wherever you are.
Don't be shy.
Chocolate! Yo, yo, dj chocolate I eat chocolate 24/7 Chocolate I'm in heaven Rockin' it, sockin' it Whatnottin' it Chocolate I'm talkin' chocolate Yo, I'm loco for cocoa I'm spendin' all my money on a chocolate Bunny Travel wide and far for a chocolate bar 'Cause I'm loco for cocoa I'm crazy for chocolate with nuts That's right, I'm nuts I'm talkin' chocolate Milk, water, starch Add caramel and extra pork I'd even fill up This shark Look out I'm talkin' chocolate Ch-ch-chocolate Chocolate - Hey, you ready to study? - Oh, yeah.
I'm not gonna fall asleep.
I'm gonna stay awake, study, and pass that biology test.
That's the spirit.
And I'm gonna help you.
I picked up some supplies: An energy drink, some vitamins, and a secret weapon.
A secret weapon? An apple.
- An apple? - Apples give you energy.
So your body turns the nutrients into cellular fuel atp, which stands for adenosine triphosphate, which, basically Okay, I'm gonna need this apple to wake me up from your description of how apples are supposed to wake me up.
Oh, speaking of plant life, photosynthesis.
Photosynthesis is the process by which plants and algae - turn sunlight into energy.
- What are you doing? Keeping the heartbeat up, staying awake.
Go on.
Okay, so let's see.
Plants take in carbon dioxide and that sounded like Marvin.
Marvin? That didn't sound human.
Oh, he's probably just doing one of his stupid werewolf impressions.
I'll go tell him to keep it down so we can focus.
Don't worry.
I'll keep studying, and I won't fall asleep.
Okay.
It's just you and me, apple.
And one of us is going down, and it's not gonna be me.
Marvin, are you okay? You sound like a beached whale.
Wait.
Comic book idea number 22: He's part whale, part alien; the whalien.
He fights crime in the ocean and space.
Wow, this one's gonna write itself.
What is going on in here? - What is going on? - Oh.
I fended for myself by eating all that chocolate, and it gave me a toothache.
- Oh, Marvin.
- It's not my fault, though.
I mean, who could turn down a chocolate rapper? Ch-ch-ch-ch-chocolate.
Marvin, you're being a little bit dramatic.
- I mean, it's just a toothache.
- Yeah, you're gonna be okay.
Okay, show mom Liz where it hurts, sweetie, all right? Whoa! - Wow.
- Whoa.
- I'll go get the alien parenting guide.
- Yeah.
Character note: The whalien has the tooth of a walrus.
He probably doesn't get a lot of dates.
Pitch on that later.
Okay, it's definitely a toothache.
According to the guide, the tooth is filled with a highly pressurized molar mouth gas.
If we don't extract it, the tooth explodes.
- Explodes? - Yeah, like a really big explosion.
I mean, like a really big, huge, big explosion.
- Whoa.
- Whoa.
I'm too young to explode.
Marvin! It's my last meal.
I'm gonna eat chocolate.
Okay, nobody panic.
According to the guide, we have a half hour before the tooth explodes.
Half an hour? We've got to work fast.
I'll set a timer.
Good idea.
Liz.
Okay, let me take a look at it.
Don't touch it! Whoa! Whoa! This is like the time that crazy raccoon got trapped in the garage.
- Oh.
- Maybe we should call animal control.
- Yeah.
- No, we just need to do something to calm him down.
Okay, it says we can use methylphenol for anesthesia.
Methylphenol.
- What's methylphenol? - Wait, we just studied that.
It's the chemical found in human sweat.
Stay back! I got this one.
I apologize in advance.
Oh! Oh! Oh! Oh, that stinks.
Dad, when's the last time you changed your sock? An hour ago.
Oh.
Ooh.
Eh Uh.
Sock it to you.
Hey! What's going something smells nasty in here.
Don't come in! What's going on in there? They were having a farting contest.
That's what boys do.
But your mom was in there too.
Somebody's got to be the judge.
That sounds like a pretty bad job.
All right, well, time to head home, you know, call it a night.
Wait.
We still have studying to do! - No, no.
You really have to go.
- No, I have a test tomorrow.
We have to study mammals, reptiles, ecosystem cellular stuff.
You know what? You're right.
Let's get comfortable for a long night of studying.
All right, we've got, you know, ribonucleic acid.
Oh, take off your shoes.
Here's this blanket.
Take this.
Deoxyribonucleic acid.
Thanks.
Bring on the biology.
Okay, how about cells? There's two types, eukaryotic, prokaryotic.
Living with biology: Covering all the wonders Honk and shoo.
Mighty blue whale.
That's some powerful sock.
Why aren't you guys singing along? Everybody loves a good klootonian folk song.
14 minutes.
Okay, we're wasting time.
I'm yanking it.
No, don't yank it! Don't yank it, okay? According to the guide, fixing an alien tooth is like disarming a bomb.
We have to pull the nerves out in a precise order now.
- So let's take a look.
- All right, so open your mouth, Marvin.
We need to see inside.
Hey, great.
What now? Oh, wait.
What were the words to that song again? Everybody now.
Big finish! I got him! Oh, let's see what we're dealing with.
Oh! Whoo! All right, Liz, you've been through childbirth.
You can get through this.
No! That is way grosser.
- Oh.
- You guys are a bunch of babies.
- I've been studying biology all night.
- This is basic anatomy.
I mean, how different could it be? Are you kidding me? He's got five stomachs.
His kidney's shaped like a liver.
His liver's shaped like a kidney.
And look at this thing.
I don't even know what that is! Just hand me the tweezers.
Tweezers.
All right, what do I do first? Okay, it says to pluck the green nerve carefully.
Got it.
You're good at that.
Observe as binary fission begins with DNA replication.
Son of a Klerg! Make it stop! Oh! Guys, I don't mean to interrupt.
In 11 minutes, boom.
Oh! Oh! What we need to do next is to pluck the Klonk-colored nerve.
- Klonk? - That's what it says.
I don't know.
Marvin, what color's klonk? It's like a dark glurkle.
- Glurkle? - Marvin, that doesn't help us! I don't remember how to say it in English.
Just show me my mouth, and I'll tell you which one to cut.
All right, all right.
Here.
It's it's disgusting! Oh, my beautiful mouth.
Oh, boy.
It's starting to buzz.
- That can't be good.
- No.
Okay, I'm just gonna have to pick a nerve at random.
- Okay.
- Yeah.
Okay, blue.
Teri, you did it! Yes! I was right.
"Klonk" means "blue.
" Uh Oh.
Klonk's not blue.
Okay.
Oh, I remember now.
Klonk's red.
How could you forget the color red? - I don't know.
- It's your favorite color! - You've got to focus here! - Guys, hold on a second.
The light and the buzzing; really bad.
It's okay, dad.
We still have nine and a half minutes left.
- No, no, no.
- Now this thing could blow any second.
You guys have done too much for me already.
I can't put you in danger! Marvin, wait! Humanoid family, good-bye.
I love you all! Oh, he's out of control.
Why is he turning around? The boy sniffed too much sock.
He's coming right at us.
Hit the deck! Ah! Marvin, are you okay? Oh, my head is buzzing.
Oh.
Oh, wait.
It's my tooth.
I'm going to explode! Ah! I must protect the family.
We got to get that tooth out of here.
- Yeah.
- Yeah.
Wait.
I got it.
Okay, dad, grab Marvin.
Bob, fishing pole.
Henry, chocolate thunder.
- Awesome! - Yes! Okay, done.
Okay, ready.
Okay, Henry, don't stop riding till that tooth comes out.
On it.
Uh! Ah! Whoo! Ooh! The line snapped! Get that tooth out of here! It's gonna blow! It's time for the Pop-Pop flop shot.
Will you just hit the tooth? Oh.
Earth family, you guys saved my life.
How will I ever repay you? I don't know.
These fireworks are pretty cool.
Yeah.
Oh, I like the glurkle one.
Oh, it's really more of a dark klonk.
- Mom Liz? - Yeah? I'm sorry I disobeyed you.
I realize you were only depriving me of deliciousness for my own good.
That's okay, Marvin.
Just don't ever call me "missy.
" - Hey.
- Now, that was chocolate thunder.
- Pound! - Yah! Don't forget to blow it up! And, yes, you can keep the bike.
Awesome! - Teri! - Brianna? I know everything! It's not what it looks like.
I know everything.
I know the three stages of cell reproduction are mitosis, meiosis, and binary fission.
I know that photosynthesis starts what's going on in here? Uh bonus round of the fart contest.
Hey, great job learning all that biology.
I'm gonna take you home now.
Let's go.
Okay.
Bye.
- Your family's weird.
- Wow.
That was quite a night, wasn't it? Marvin! No.
Come on.
Okay? Hey! Well, I guess the moral of the story is, you're never too young to ride a mini bike.
I think the moral is that if your mom won't let you eat chocolate, it's because she cares about you not because she wants to eat it all herself.
- No, no, no.
- It's that you can study in your sleep.
Brianna got a "B+" on that test.
Oh, please.
The moral of the story is, grip it and rip it! You're all wrong.
The moral of the story is, none of this would've happened if everyone had just made time for family dinner night.
I think we can all agree on that one.
True.
So, Marvin, you lost a tooth.
That means you're gonna get a visit from the tooth Fairy.
Tooth Fairy? That's the most scary monster on all of Klooton! Good thing we didn't tell him about the Easter Bunny.