Melrose Place s04e26 Episode Script

2395118 - The Burning Couch

[siren.]
I got your message.
What happened? Bobby and Peter, they got in a fight.
Over you, I'm sure.
Well, Bobby was pushing to get back together.
When I refused, he got hostile and out of control.
Mm-hm.
The one common trait of all the men in your life.
Psst, psst! Come on.
Hey, hey-- It's about time.
I need a favor.
From what I hear, you need a lawyer.
Crippled by a Parezi? We're talking million-dollar lawsuit.
Aahh! I need you to get rid of Amanda and Alycia for me.
Just tell them I'm tied up in x-ray or something.
Oh, the old two girlfriend shuffle.
I danced that step myself a few times.
You know, the best conversations are the ones you avoid.
Just make them go away.
Okay? [door opens.]
Dr.
Burns, I'll need your statement.
You brought in the cops? Just to make sure that Parezi gets what he deserves.
We can talk over here.
Excuse me, ladies.
I just spoke with Peter.
He's doing fine under the circumstances, which, by the way, were? None of your business.
How is he? Sprain, mild concussion.
Oh, thank God it's nothing serious.
I'd like to see him.
So would I.
I'm sorry, he's in x-ray right now.
And it could take a while.
You two should just go on home.
And then I'll have him call you in the morning.
I think I'll stay.
Me, too.
If you see him, tell him we're both concerned.
Wow.
Peter's own private harem.
I don't know if that makes him cursed or unbelievably lucky.
Excuse me.
Well, Bobby, you're off the hook.
The nurse said it's only a sprained wrist and a mild concussion.
Syd, the man's a surgeon.
I could have ruined his career.
Oh, no.
Where are you going-- wait! The hospital.
Bobby, throwing Peter over the railing was stupid.
Don't go and do something stupider.
Out of my way, Syd.
I'm touched by the concern, even though it makes absolutely no sense at all.
I care, all right? Is that a crime? Lady, I don't even know why the hell you're here much less why the hell you care.
Because I know what it's like to be trampled by that bunch, Peter, Amanda, and the courtyard crew.
You look around one day and realize that they're the only friends you've got.
And that's when you're in real trouble.
You need a real friend, Bobby.
I like you.
I understand you.
And yeah, I care, all right? Listen, don't go and do anything crazy.
Hold it right there.
Robert Parezi, we have a warrant for your arrest.
Assault, Dr.
Peter Burns.
Leave him alone.
It was an accident.
You don't have to do that.
Just stay out of it, Syd.
I mean it.
[theme music.]
[pop song plays.]
It's on the tip of my tongue It's on the tip, the tip of my tongue It's on the tip, the tip of my tongue It's on the tip-- what's my name? It's on the tip of my tongue It's on the tip, the tip of my tongue It's on the tip, the tip of my tongue It's on the tip, the tip of my tongue Think hard, think fast If you want the love to last What's my name? It's on the tip of my tongue It's on the tip, the tip of my tongue It's on the tip, the tip of my tongue It's on the tip, the tip of my tongue [door opens.]
Good morning.
Good morning.
Can I get you some breakfast? Sorry, no time.
I have to be back at the office by 11:00.
Peter sprained his wrist.
So I'm covering his scheduled surgeries.
So you just came home to change? Why, should I be expecting something else? Didn't think so, after that fiasco last night.
You know, it's funny, I always thought our sexual fantasy games would include, say me.
Michael, I'm sorry.
I don't know what got into me.
I just sort of lost it.
Yeah, putting it mildly.
It's just I don't know, I, um I get into this panic.
Because of me? We've been through that.
Yeah, I know.
I thought so, too.
It's just, um No, so much has happened all at once.
And, um I just get confused.
It's weird, that's all.
Well, you know if it's something else, you can tell me? No.
I'm over it.
You sure? Let me prove it to you.
Here we go, all up to date.
Whoa, Billy, these are your accounts.
Were my accounts.
Since I landed Midnight Sun Vodka and Three-Point Shoes, I don't have time to handle little fish.
Oh, and I do? I just doubled your client list.
So you can thank me when your annual bonus goes up 30%.
Oh, how nice, you're doing this all for me.
There's no reason why we can't both profit from my success.
Besides, you juggle the needs of small clients better than anybody.
And what's your specialty, stealing big-ticket accounts from unsuspecting colleagues? If you're talking about Three-Point Shoes, Amanda left the door wide open.
Well, she didn't expect to be blind-sided by her own team.
I did it for the company.
You did not, Billy! You did it for you.
Now if you're gonna be a cutthroat, take the heat, not the credit.
I don't got time for this.
Well, take the time.
Billy, would you listen to yourself? It is so obvious what's going on here.
You're not only acting like Brooke, you've become her.
You've taken all that guilt and made yourself into the same monster she was.
Brooke was never this successful.
You have the worst case of denial I have ever seen.
If you have any questions about the accounts, page me.
Matt.
There you are.
Are you okay? I heard about Alan's wedding.
It's gotta be a tough thing to deal with.
Look, Alan made a choice.
It wasn't me.
So I made a choice, too.
To go on with my life.
Matt, you can't just pretend Alan never happened.
They're running video of his honeymoon on all the talk shows.
Good for Alan, he'll love the publicity.
Damn it, Matt.
He is out there having the time of his life, and you are alone and miserable.
You cannot stand there and pretend that you're not angry.
Look, I am angry, okay? But what am I supposed to do? Alan's married.
Yeah, a bogus marriage that you're letting him get away with.
I tell ya, the tabloids would love a story like this.
Outing is their favorite hobby.
They'd pay a bundle.
Sell the story? You know what, I hope you're kidding.
He deserves it, the way he's treated you.
You know what, David, you may not understand why I still care about him, but I do.
You know, Al messed up my life some, but in the process, he created a much bigger problem for himself.
Just trust me, David.
Alan will get punishment enough without my help.
You're late.
I was about to leave.
Good news.
You're never going to have to wait for me again.
I want out of this stupid charade, Alycia.
Now, we screwed over Bobby with the senator photos.
All good and well.
We even had some damn good sex along the way, but I've had it.
I can't keep pretending we're having a real relationship, no matter how much you blackmail me.
My, so full of blustery conviction, but stupid.
Unless you want me to tell Amanda what you did to Bobby and destroy any hopes you have of a future with her.
I love her, Alycia.
Sorry.
I can't let you go.
You still have some kind of hope for you and me? No.
That evaporated weeks ago.
Truth is, it's all down to business at this point.
I'm still $2 million short for the takeover.
Well, so go raise $2 million.
Don't hold me hostage.
What if this charade, as you like to call it, is up for sale? For the coincidental asking price of, say, that's very amusing.
Now, where the hell am I gonna raise that kind of money? Two million buys your freedom, Peter.
That's my final offer.
Take it, or keep playing the game.
$2,500.
Mr.
Parezi is ready for release.
Okay.
Sydney, you bailed me out.
Well, I waited, but Amanda didn't beat me to the punch.
Well, somewhere along the line, you got this impression that I can't take care of myself.
Well, you weren't exactly bailing yourself out.
I should tell you to go jump in a lake.
But you're just too damn grateful.
Just think of me as your guardian angel.
I give and give and give and ask nothing in return.
I don't believe in angels.
Neither do I.
It sounded great, didn't it? I'm too tired to know or even care.
In that case, "Sydney's Taxi," at your service.
Home, then straight to bed.
[light rock.]
I hear what you say Things pretty dismal on the job hunt? No.
Ever since word got out that Richard let everyone go, my freelance offers have been nonstop.
I just-- I miss Richard.
I miss the relationship.
Miss the stability.
What is it with this guy? He treats you like dirt, and you're still in love with him.
He dumps all over Jane, and she hires him into her company.
Maybe Jane believes in his ability.
She must, Either that or she's more desperate than I thought she was.
Or he's more talented.
Either way, it doesn't matter what I think.
Jane fights her own battles.
I believe in her.
God, open your eyes, Jake.
Everyone has a dark side, even Saint Jane.
She did not hire him because she's full of compassion.
What, do you think there's some evil ultimatum? I didn't say that.
Then don't imply it.
Jane hired Richard with no strings attached.
Yeah.
Like Pinocchio was ever a real boy.
What? Look, Richard has never been able to stand on his own two feet.
Now is no exception.
Good night, Jake, before I say another word.
I think we're right on with this approach.
You have to understand, Bobby's world was caving in.
And then I broke up with him.
Amanda, you didn't do anything wrong.
Any of the pain he's going through is self-inflicted.
But we don't have to make his problems worse.
If you don't press charges, the D.
A.
will drop the whole thing.
We'll be free of him, both of us.
All right.
I won't press charges.
Thank you.
On one condition-- tell me why you keep looking over at Billy.
Serious case of curiosity.
Billy's dining with a major player, Lief Thomasen.
He's the owner and CEO of Midnight Sun Vodka.
And Billy landed the account, but he keeps on pushing.
Why? I have no idea.
I'll find out.
Peter Well, let's just say I'm in the mood to do favors.
Give me 90 seconds, then follow.
Billy! I understand congratulations are in order.
Amanda says you're doing a hell of a job.
I'm sorry to interrupt, my name is Peter Burns.
Lief Thomasen.
Thomasen? President of Midnight Sun Vodka.
You know of me? Oh, I know a lot more about your vodka.
It's my favorite brand.
You know, I watched that stock, Midnight Sun, for quite a while now.
I just wish I'd've bought some shares a few years back.
It's never too late to invest.
Well, it might be for me.
Right now, I've got my capital sort of tied up in a new cable company.
Cable? That's an interesting venture.
I own a satellite company in Germany.
Astral Television.
It's huge.
Right.
Well, be glad you're on solid ground.
I've got the access.
I've got the license.
Unfortunately, we just lost a major player last week.
But your other financing is in place? Yeah, except for the final $2 million, which is actually a shame because you know, it's a great opportunity for somebody to own a big share.
Peter! I thought you were just going to say hi.
Sorry.
I must have lost track of time.
Join us, Amanda.
Oh, no! We're going to the "thea-tah.
" So, anyways, a pleasure meeting you.
Billy, I'll talk to you later.
What do you think, Billy? Cable company sound like a good investment to you? As long as I get a piece of the action.
So, what did you find out? What's Billy up to? He's not up to anything.
He's just keeping a big fish happy.
Oh, shame on you, Kimberly.
Look at this place.
Ugh, it's disgusting.
Disgusting.
Filthy, filthy lust on the couch.
Not on Betsy's couch.
Michael is a bad, bad boy.
Kimberly makes the mess.
Betsy cleans up the filth.
Hi! Hi.
You're home early.
Well, I pawned off Peter's last bypass case on Maloney.
Remind me next time to choose a partner with a less complicated personal life.
And, uh where the hell is the couch? What? The potted plant is a clever disguise but tough to watch a ballgame from.
Oh, y'know, that old couch was a Sydney relic.
I'm having our new couch delivered this morning.
Oh.
Redecorating? Mmm, revitalizing.
Well, you keep it up, and you can dump the whole damn house.
Come on.
I'm gonna make you breakfast in bed.
Oh, you know what, I've been inside the hospital for two days.
You know, the air out here feels great! [breathes in.]
Whoa.
What the hell happened down there? You know, last night some kids were having a bonfire.
But I chased them off.
Come on.
I'll make you bacon and eggs.
Your favorite.
Be right there.
[chuckling.]
I'm gone one day, and you take over my office? Bobby, you're no longer involved in this company, And this office isn't yours anymore, but you're more than welcome to come by.
Damn you.
You're my lawyer.
Why didn't you take my calls? I couldn't.
I'm in the middle of this acquisition, and it would have been a direct conflict of interest.
The only conflict is you're in love with Burns.
I'm trying to salvage this deal.
I can't be associated with you now.
Fine.
Give me my check, and I'll be out of your way.
Bobby, your assets are in a holding account.
And the FCC won't release them until they unravel your involvement with the senator, and, frankly, this new arrest didn't help.
Investigating the senator could take years.
And I put everything I had into this company! I know, and I'm sorry.
But it's out of my hands.
[Alycia.]
Bobby! Don't! This is still my office! I don't have to give them back anything! You think I'm gonna leave anything for them, huh?! Bobby, stop it! Stop! Do I look like I can afford to bail you out again? Besides, I'm double-parked in the white zone.
You bailed him out?! Only because his so-called other friends seem to have vaporized off the planet.
Well, because the two of you are so chummy, you'd better get him out of here before I call the cops! Fine.
Bobby, come on.
Let's go.
To hell with it.
You really should have returned his phone calls.
Oh, yeah? And you keep that little upturned nose out of it! Not a chance.
I'd feel better if you took a flat finder's fee, Billy.
Getting the cable company as a client is good enough for me.
$2 million.
You'll see that Dr.
Burns' associates get it right away.
Immediately.
I'll see you for dinner tomorrow.
Thank you.
Hello! So, Billy, what is this? I just landed a great account.
Which means nothing if it doesn't work out and DD loses all credibility.
Well, I won't be going down alone.
Because it was Peter who brought up the deal.
Peter? Last night? Yeah.
Lief is gonna finance the cable company.
And then I'm gonna well, DD will manage the million-plus advertising account.
This is unethical.
I was a partner in this company.
It's all screwed up with the FCC.
If this company goes down, we lose Lief.
He made the decision to invest.
Always keep the client happy, wasn't that your advice? The celebration dinner is tomorrow.
I'll pick you up at 7:00.
Pass.
Keep me out of this.
It wasn't an invitation.
You are head of the department, and Lief is expecting you to be there.
Oh, do me a favor, make sure that Alison and her snow-white opinion stays home.
Peter? I really need to talk to you.
It's important.
Yeah.
Come on.
Here.
I shouldn't be here, but I didn't know where else to turn.
It's happening again, Peter.
Weird things, things I can't control.
Well, I'll need a for instance.
Last week, I dressed up in clothes I don't remember buying, called myself Betsy, and ordered hundreds of dollars worth of Tupperware.
It gets worse.
Last night I pushed our couch off the deck and set it on fire.
You're sure? Yeah, I snapped out of it and tried to put the fire out.
And I lied to Michael about it this morning.
I don't know whether he bought it or not.
Peter, if anyone finds out, I'll lose everything-- Michael and my career.
Promise me you won't tell anyone.
Promise me you'll help.
I won't do anything to add more stress to your life, but, Kimberly, we have to monitor this.
I want you to start this medication now.
And if it happens again, if this "Betsy" returns, you call me, immediately.
What do you think is happening? Nothing we can take lightly.
Now fill this right away.
Thank you, Peter.
[banging on door.]
You and Richard are out to ruin Jane's life again, aren't you? What? Why else would he weasel his way back into her company, and why would you let it slip that something was going on? If you're talking about last night, I'd had a few drinks.
Bad excuse.
You're still in love with him, and I think you'd do anything to get him back.
Ever occur to you to take a hard look at Jane? Oh, Jane has nothing to do with any of this.
Okay.
All right.
It is high time you had a dose of reality about your sacred Jane.
Yeah, it's Jane holding a tiki torch.
That's what set off the sprinklers and destroyed Richard's show! You used these photos to blackmail Richard into a job? When I discovered these, I had to decide what I wanted out of this.
I could have just destroyed Jane, but I wouldn't have gotten anything out of that.
And all you wanted was Richard back.
I wanted to help him.
Yeah, I wanted him back.
I was with her that night.
She was out of her head.
Yeah, and I was out of mine to think she could rise above Richard's crap or yours.
You people are so screwed up.
Yeah, maybe we are, but you can't say anything.
Oh, sure, another secret.
Jane, the woman I love, flooded a building, but just ignore that.
Whether you know it or not, you just blew this thing wide open.
Jake! Get out of my way.
[knock on door.]
Sydney.
Amanda, I demand you drop the charges against Bobby.
You don't demand anything from me.
And when are you gonna learn that I'm always way ahead of you? You got the charges dropped? Peter's working on it.
Any other unreasonable requests? Um-- nope.
Thanks.
Sydney? Why are you suddenly so involved with Bobby? Well, what if I am? It's not like you care about him anymore.
You saw what he did to Peter.
Two grown men had a fight, big deal.
Bobby is just a big, giant teddy bear.
One minute, and extremely dangerous the next.
Only to his enemies.
That would be Peter and you.
Oh, and Alycia.
Sydney, this isn't a game.
I broke up with Bobby because he lied to me.
Oh, Amanda, like that's the first time that's ever happened to you.
First your father, then the FBI, Peter, Jack did you ever stop to think maybe it's not the men in your life, Amanda? Maybe it's you.
Listen, you little twit, you don't have a clue as to what you're getting involved in.
Amanda, take a pill.
Things are different now.
Bobby has a real woman at his side, not just some career junkie girlfriend who puts her own interests first.
Sorry, I had a momentary flash of compassion.
Fortunately, it's passed.
Oh, Matt, you're not gonna like this.
Oh, Matt, there you are.
Have you seen this? What? It's a story about you and Alan.
--extended the hours, that way we could get more people through-- He'll catch up to you.
Excuse me.
Your people skills need some serious work, Matt.
This article is word for word what you said to me the other day.
I didn't plant the article.
You're not the first man Alan's been with.
A lot of people know that he's gay.
So, what, you expect me to believe it's coincidence? I am your friend, Matt.
I stuck by you when Alan treated you like trash.
You know what, friends don't sell each other out.
Fine, believe what you want to believe.
Personally, I am sick of hearing about your messed-up relationship.
From now on, leave me out of it.
$2 million.
You found an investor.
Lief Thomasen, vodka king.
Sign the deal, kiss the check, and you're a cable tycoon.
End of charade, Alycia.
I'm free.
For what it's worth, I loved you, Peter.
I know you did.
The West Coast Retail Buyers Association executive committee will meet in the blue room at 7:30.
I see you haven't lost your touch.
Guess not.
Feels good to be working again.
I'm so happy for you, Richard.
Thank you.
Hey, have you guys seen Jake? Yeah, he's at the bar.
Jane, I don't know what, but there's something on that guy's mind.
Thanks.
Hey, you hiding out? Just trying to stay out of the way of the Jane train.
What does that mean? That means that I'm having a miserable time, and if you cared at all, you would just let me rot in my stew, so to speak.
Hon, exactly how much have you had to drink? Not so much that I'm gonna shoot my mouth off, lucky you.
Okay, I'm cutting you off.
You don't tell me what to do.
You understand? I'm not gonna be one of your lackeys.
Maybe you should tell me where this is coming from.
Better yet, I'll tell you where it's going.
Nowhere.
I'm not right for you.
And this whole joke of a relationship is finished.
At least for tonight.
I'll have someone call you a cab.
I'll call my own.
I'd offer to buy you a drink, but sounds like a sensitive subject.
Yeah, I'm a sensitive guy, right? I hope not.
Jake Hanson.
The most insensitive S.
O.
B.
you're ever gonna meet.
Claire Duncan, who could care less.
Too bad we're at such a boring party.
Well, you're here with someone.
Just Tom, Tom Collins.
You know, he's a friend of mine.
Can I get you another one? No.
Actually, I've had enough.
I'm all warm and fuzzy inside.
What a waste, huh? It doesn't have to be.
Tonight it does.
Hotel rooms can be so lonely.
So you're staying here then, I take it.
I'm here tonight for the party.
But we're not gonna talk about business, are we? Nope, I sure hope not.
You said that just like John Wayne.
I've always wanted to sleep with John Wayne.
Well, that's too bad.
He's deceased.
Well, you're not, I hope.
Here's the keycard to my room.
I'll make you forget all about that girl.
It's a promise.
What took you so long? Are there strings attached? Just these.
Turkey and ham.
Can we talk? I was pretty drunk last night, but that doesn't change how I feel.
About what? You know, we're getting along fine, and then you turn on me out of nowhere.
Jo told me about the fashion show.
Okay? I saw photos.
My God, I was there with you.
I begged you to go! Jake, it wasn't as though I'd planned it.
I just-- I worked so hard.
And seeing my designs in his fashion show was all I could take.
I lost control.
I didn't mean to ruin Richard's career.
It's just that I couldn't stand seeing him get credit for my work.
You've always taken my side and stood up to Richard, no questions asked.
I've never had that kind of support before.
Well, if I'd known.
You would've dumped me.
Jake, I let Jo blackmail me so that you wouldn't find out.
I love you.
And I understand your anger, but whatever you decide about us, I promise you, I'll never lie to you again.
Jane I love you, too.
I'm so sorry, Jake.
Oh, you've never lied to me.
I trust you so much.
I promise you.
I'll make sure you can trust me, too.
Don't worry.
Everything'll work out.
[knock on door.]
Hey.
Alan, I thought you were in Hawaii.
Yeah, well, I decided to come home.
Look, if it's about that article I planted the story, Matt.
I outted myself.
It was the only way.
I mean, I was completely caught up with my parents' expectations and, you know, Gloria's master plan that just act content.
But when reality hit, I I realized I couldn't pull it off, and it was even worse because I didn't have you.
You were right about everything, I mean, all of it.
Look, Alan, I don't know what to say.
I don't know what you want from me.
Oh.
I just wanted to tell you that I'm back home, and that Gloria fired me from the show.
So you're back to square one? Yeah.
Yeah, yeah, you know what? It feels great, I mean, I can start over, you know? My career, my life.
A life that would be a heck of a lot brighter with you in it.
But, uh Yeah, yeah, I Anyway, think about it, okay? Goodbye, Alan.
Bobby Parezi is scott free.
Where would you like to celebrate? I appreciate what you did for me, Peter, but I have other plans tonight.
Wait a minute, plans more important than our long overdue reconciliation? What reconciliation? Oh, come on, Amanda, give me a break.
I got you off the hook with the cable company.
I divested my interests in the stocks and Alycia.
And as a special bonus, my Dodger season tickets now belong to the D.
A.
as ransom for Bobby's freedom.
And that means I'm now obligated to jump into your arms out of relief and-- what else? Um, gratitude? I didn't do this for my health, you know.
Well, it would have been nice if you did it because it was the right thing to do, not because getting me in bed was a door prize.
Oh, don't do this, Amanda, please, don't do this-- You did it, Peter.
Billy told me about your deal with Lief Thomasen.
Lief wanted to invest, and I wanted Alycia off of my back! And you're deflecting what this is really all about.
What this has always been about! Oh, don't start with that fear of intimacy thing with me! Well, what the hell else would you call it? Fear of dishonesty, a logical and sensible fear of men who are incapable of telling the truth.
You fit in that category.
Hell, you own it.
Ah, you look terrific.
Ready to go? Yeah, I was just saying good-bye to Peter.
Good-bye, Peter.
Have a nice evening.
Don't ask.
[Peter.]
Alison.
Well, doesn't this bring back memories? It's a business dinner.
I forgot the merger file.
I'll be right back.
Wonder where all this will end? It could end right now if you keep your opinion to yourself.
I have one question.
What exactly did this to you? What would you say if I told you that Brooke's ghost visited me and cursed me to become just like her, y'know, a cold, heartless bastard, out for himself? I'd say it was a cheap excuse.
And if you really wanted to find your way back, you could.
You're absolutely right, I could.
But now that I'm on top and loving it, why would I ever want to? [Amanda.]
Ready.
See you, Alison.
Have a nice night in front of the TV.
Oh, hi.
Dinner's ready.
Mmm, feels like you're ready for dessert.
It's a big table.
Jake, we're not alone.
Don't even mention the Richard word.
No, my new assistant's here.
Well, send him home.
I can't.
Excuse me.
I'm sorry.
Claire, this is Jake Hanson.
Jake, this is my new assistant, Claire Duncan.
Nice to meet you, Mr.
Hanson.
Jake.
Jake is fine.
I indexed all the fabric orders and I stamped all the outgoing mail.
Great.
Well, I'll see you tomorrow.
Thanks, Claire.
Okay, see you.
Good night, Mr.
Hanson.
I-- I'm sorry, Jake.
Now, where were we? I wish Kimberly wouldn't keep such bad company Pig.
She might like pigs, but I don't.
Betsy has more sense than that.
Oh, Kimberly.
What's wrong? I don't know.
I I heard something outside.
Okay, well, I'll check it out.
[theme music.]

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