Melrose Place s06e13 Episode Script

A Tree Talks in Melrose

1 Hey.
The bank doesn't own this place yet.
We don't need to keep banker's hours.
Well, it's hardly the crack of dawn.
Besides, it's Christmastime, and I have a Christmas miracle for you.
You don't believe in Christmas miracles.
Oh, really? Mmm-hmm.
Jon Secada.
We wish you a Merry Christmas We wish you a Merry Christmas We wish you a Merry Christmas And a Happy New Year Good tidings to you wherever you are Good tidings for Christmas And a Happy New Year We wish you a Merry Christmas We wish you a Merry Christmas We wish you a merry Christmas And a Happy New Year How you doin', man? A long time since Boston.
And a bottle of McBride scotch? Yeah.
So what brings you to L.
? I'm doing Leno, and Taylor was kind enough to offer me your piano.
And I get the bends when I don't sing for a day.
Jon, you know what? I'll never forget the time you sang at the restaurant in Boston for us.
It was so great.
You cooked me one of the best meals I've ever had.
Ooh! Thank you.
Cheers to that.
So, how's the place doin'? Oh, it's a lease.
Long story.
Taylor: We're going to lose our lease on this place, too if you don't help us out of a jam.
Come on, Kyle, this is a miracle Jon showing up out of the blue.
Hey, I'm always ready to help my friends.
Hate to see a good jazz club go down the tubes.
Taylor: Oh, I knew you'd feel that way.
The bank's going to take the club next week if we don't come up with this big balloon payment for our mortgage.
So I just thought if you play then, then Taylor, this is Jon Secada, for God's sake.
You can't ask him that.
Jon Sure she can.
A woman who looks like that can ask me anything.
We'll make it a Christmas Eve concert.
We'll charge a cover.
The place'll be packed.
We'll make a fortune.
So, why don't I give the guys in my band a call? The phone's right over there.
Are you crazy? Come on Nobody even goes out on Christmas Eve, it's a family time.
Do you have a family? Do I? No.
This whole city's one big lonely hearts club, Kyle.
We'll be the only place open.
We'll sell out.
Kyle, listen to me.
When someone like Jon Secada falls into your lap, you say, "Thank you, Santa," and you run with it.
Mistletoe and caroling Presents lie underneath the tree It's Christmastime again Sounds of holly, snow is falling Father Christmas, all the kids are waiting Baby Jesus, Mother Mary The snowman's quite amazing It don't feel like Christmas Ever since you took away your kisses If I could have just one wish Hey, Jennifer's coming over to talk fabrics.
You don't mind, do you? Would you stop staring at me? I'm fine.
I'm not staring.
Yes, you are.
Look, I can't make it through a whole day without popping a pill.
But you don't believe me because I just took one the other night, right? We're hiding your involvement in a hit-and-run accident from the police.
That's more than your normal level of stress.
Yeah, especially for a pill-popper like myself.
Last week was a very bad week for both of us.
So I think we need to get away and relax a little bit.
Hmm? Besides, last year, I had no reason to celebrate Christmas, and this year I do.
So I got you an early present.
Oh! We're going sailing! Oh, you're you're so wonderful to me.
I don't deserve you.
You deserve the best of everything.
I'll get that on my way out.
Cool place! Very young doctor on the prowl.
Hello, Jennifer.
Oh, I'm sure he's not prowling anymore, though.
I'll see you tonight.
Oh, you and Peter seem so happy together.
The way he looks at you, God, he'd do anything for you.
I wish Craig was more like that.
Are you two having some problems? Yeah, you could say that.
Oh, excuse me.
Peter must've forgotten something.
What did you You look miserable as always.
Well, maybe that's because I live in a tiny little apartment, and you live out here in the Marina.
Look, I don't give a damn what your lawyers say.
I'm not hand-delivering your blood money anymore.
You keep your voice down, I'm in the middle of a meeting.
You know what? I can't wait for the day that I don't owe you anymore alimony! Lexi: That's five years from now.
You better learn to share.
Oh, and by the way, if you do win the Michael Mancini case, you'll be splitting the company profits with me, too.
Coop: You know what? You are a parasite, you know that? I would do anything to get you off my back.
It's getting late.
You wanna go pick out our first Christmas tree? Oh, gosh, I'm totally swamped.
How about tomorrow? This is tomorrow, honey.
I'm sorry, Billy.
This week's just been really bad.
But Christmas is coming up soon, and there's not going to be any trees left, okay? Please, Billy.
The Seattle project is really important to me.
And just the fact that Amanda has all this faith in me, I just want to do a super job for her.
Charlie used to pull the same thing on me.
He'd rush out the last minute to buy a tree, and we always ended up with some scrawny little thing.
Well, then you and Billy go pick out a tree.
No, offense, Connie.
I want to go with my wife.
Billy, we could have the tree up by the time Sam gets home tonight.
And then tomorrow night, you two could knock yourselves out decorating it.
You're a lifesaver.
See you.
You want to come in? Um, no, no.
I just came by to ask you if, as my doctor and my boss, if I can come back to work.
Well, like I'm gonna say no to you.
We'll start you on half-days.
All right.
Tomorrow then.
Hey, wait a second.
Wait a second.
There's something else bothering you.
I'm divorcing Michael, and I went to see the lawyer, and he already drew up the papers.
And I've been sitting for the last half hour trying to pick up the pen and sign them.
I can't.
Well, divorce is never an easy thing.
Look, without going into any details, Michael really helped me turn my life around, so And you feel like you owe him.
Well, you can't build a marriage on that.
I tried.
I stayed with Lexi when I should've left and well, we ended up hating each other.
You're doing the right thing.
Hey, you want to come inside for a cup of coffee? Yeah.
I'm looking for Megan Mancini.
Yeah, that's me.
I'll take this.
I need you to sign here.
I wonder who this is from.
Thank you.
Merry Christmas.
I love Christmas presents! What is it? Well, I think it's a Christmas tree.
It's a little overdone.
What is this? Michael, on speaker: Dashing through the snow in a one-horse open sleigh Is that Michael? He's such a goof.
Laughing all the way Ha, ha You're not going to keep it, are you? Well, I don't have a Christmas tree, so, yeah.
I better take it inside and find a place for it.
Um, listen, could I have a rain check on that coffee? Sure.
Good night.
Good night.
Well, get used to the late nights.
Sam's always been like this.
She throws herself into whatever she's doing.
Well, we're married now, so some of that time belongs to me.
This one, right there.
That's it.
You're a good-looking guy, Billy.
Sam won't leave you alone for too long.
She's smart.
What's that supposed to mean? Hmm? Why did you do that? You're standing under the mistletoe.
Merry Christmas, Mr.
Oh, I didn't notice it.
Don't worry.
You can't catch the Christmas spirit with one kiss.
I called you five times today.
Really? You can't avoid me for the rest of your life, Jennifer.
I'm definitely considering it.
You sold out my brother and sided with that crook, so I have nothing further to say to you.
Can I get you anything, sir? Michael is lying to you.
Coop showed me the sketches he did of the glove, okay? They're solid proof that Michael stole his idea.
Those dates were faked on the sketches.
Oh, who told you that? Michael? What else did he tell you? That the moon was made of cheese? You believe anything he says.
I will take Michael's word over your word any day.
You lied under oath, and you don't have a shred of loyalty to the people you're in business with.
You know, you throw that word around, Jennifer, but all you're really loyal to, excuse me, is money.
Okay, you came on to me because you figured that one day I'd be rich again.
If some guy comes along with bigger bucks, you'd be gone in a flash.
If you really believe that, Craig, we don't have any kind of future together.
You're damn right we don't.
You okay? Yeah.
Should've seen it coming.
It's tradition.
The guy dumps me right before the holidays.
You dumped me on Christmas Eve, remember? I did? Yeah, and then you bought Taylor a diamond bracelet.
It's a wonderful life.
Jennifer, we live in the same building, we could talk there.
What's with the secrecy? Trust me, you never know when you're being watched.
Oh, well, that would explain the disguise.
Cut the small talk.
I can make you a free man.
You interested? No, not really.
If you're not interested Hey.
What have you got on Lexi? It must be really good.
She will do whatever I want.
All you have to do is drop your lawsuit against Michael and hand over the original sketches of the glove, and I'll make sure Lexi takes her claws out of your pocket.
Now why would I drop my suit? My idea's potentially worth millions.
Yeah, millions you'll have to split with Lexi if you win.
Okay, let's just say that I agree to this.
What do you get out of it? My beef is with Michael, not you.
When you attack my brother, you're also attacking me.
We Mancinis look out for each other, we always have.
You ever stop to think that maybe your brother's not worth this kind of devotion? No.
Now, do we have a deal or not? Yeah.
We shouldn't leave together.
You're mocking me, aren't you? Look, stop staring at me, okay? I didn't come back to the office so that you could hit on me.
In fact, I went to see a lawyer and Merry Christmas.
They're lovebirds.
I'm sorry.
They're very sweet, but I cannot accept them.
But you have to.
I named them Michael and Megan.
They're non-returnable.
I never figured you for the sentimental type.
Maybe I've changed.
Now, what did you want to talk to me about? We'll talk about it tomorrow, okay? Anything you say, honey.
Um I mean Megan.
Hello! Another gift, huh? Hello! Lovebirds.
Michael and Megan.
I'm not sure which one's which.
Well, obviously Michael doesn't know he's getting a divorce.
Well, I signed the papers already.
I just can't serve him until after Christmas.
It's too heartless.
I understand.
Hello! There's no food.
Michael? Yeah.
I know which one of you is Michael.
The one that stole all the birdseed.
I can't believe they get $2,000 for those lamps.
You know what? If you really like 'em, I can snag 'em up for half the price after the holidays.
Oh, that's right, you lucky dog.
You're so lucky.
Peter's surprising you with a vacation.
Of course he knows how much stress you've been under after that nasty hit-and-run.
I don't know what you're talking about.
I know all about the accident, when you almost killed that guy, and you and Peter covered it up and then lied to the cops about it.
Wow, that's heavy duty.
Oh, God.
I would be so freaked if I hit someone.
How do you sleep at night? Of course, the pills probably help.
How did you find out? That's my little secret.
And, Lexi, I will keep your little secret, but you have to do something for me in return.
Just keep Peter out of this, and I'll do anything you want.
Let Coop off the hook.
Say goodbye to your alimony.
Coop is behind this? He knows about the accident? No, no, Lexi.
So far I'm the only one.
Why are you doing this? To get Coop off my brother's back.
You're only doing this to help out Michael? I would make a deal with the devil to help Michael.
Well, you have.
If I do let Coop off the hook, how do I know that you're going to keep up your end of the bargain? Well, you don't.
But what choice do you have? I mean, if I go to the police, Lexi, you'll end up in jail, and at the very least, Peter will lose his license.
Please don't take any of this personally, Lexi, 'cause I really like you.
Besides, from what I hear, you're loaded.
So cutting Coop loose is no big deal.
Oh, and don't breathe a word of this to anybody.
Billy: So did Sam say how late she'd be? No, she was in Amanda's office.
Another one of those "I can't talk, I got to go" calls.
Oh, great.
Oh, Billy.
Um far be it for me to criticize, but Sam usually likes the big ornaments on the bottom, and the smaller ones on top.
Oh, and be careful with that stuff.
When Sam and I lived together, we always hung the tinsel stand by strand.
Well, I hate to break it to you, but you didn't write the book on Sam.
All right.
You may be married to her, but I have known her a lot longer.
And I've seen her go through a lot of relationships.
She always ended up getting bored with the guy and throwing herself into work.
How's that? Billy, I'm sorry.
I mean, I didn't mean to lump you with the others.
You're trying to cause trouble between me and Sam.
Why would I do that? I love Sam.
I want her to be happy.
And, you know, no matter what you say, that kiss you laid on me out at that tree lot was definitely not innocent.
Well, Billy, it was for me.
But if you're still thinking about it, it must've really turned you on.
And that's your problem, not mine.
Yeah, right.
You've been coming on to me since the second you got here.
I want you out of here.
After New Year's, you're gonna go find a place of your own.
All-in-all, it's a good job.
Oh, glad to hear it.
I am really beat.
We've been going since 8:00.
Don't you ever get tired? Oh, tired is for losers.
Well, what about, you know, goofing off a little, like around the holidays? Christmas is my least favorite time of year.
We Woodwards weren't big on gathering around the Christmas tree in our jammies.
Christmas was pretty rough on me when I was a kid, too.
Do you know what? It's different with Billy.
I mean, I see the Christmas lights on the street and everybody rushing around somewhere, and I just want to be home with him, lighting candles and listening to Christmas carols.
Oh, I'm sorry.
I know you just broke up with Kyle, and I'm going on and on about Billy.
Oh, don't don't apologize.
Just consider yourself lucky to have him.
Why don't you go home? I'll finish this up alone.
No, I'm not going to leave you here by yourself.
Hey, there's my girl.
Hey, pack it in, Sam.
I'm taking you to dinner.
Billy, I can't.
Yes, you can.
You've been working late every night this week.
Sorry, Amanda.
It's Christmastime.
I want to take my wife to dinner.
Unfortunately, Sam, you married the number two man in my company.
Enjoy your dinner.
Amanda, would you like to join us? Got to eat sometime.
Thanks, but three's a crowd.
Are you sure? Mmm-hmm.
I'll see you tomorrow.
Lexi, you in the bathroom? My bag.
Lexi, where are you? Lexi, where are you? This is Dr.
Peter Burns.
I've got a woman who OD'd on sleeping pills.
She's got a pulse, but her respiration's shallow.
I need an ambulance at 2261 Marina Way immediately.
Hang on for me, baby.
Just hang on a little while for me.
Why'd you do this? You know why, Coop.
You won.
That's all that counts.
You don't owe me anything anymore.
I'll put it in writing.
I'm sorry, Lexi.
I never meant to hurt you like this.
I don't want to hear that.
I wish I never met you.
I leave for five minutes, and you show up.
I mean, what is it with you and unconscious women? It's okay, Coop was just leaving.
Take care, Lexi.
I went over your chart.
You're gonna be fine.
I don't understand this.
How could you try to bail out on me? I'm sorry.
It was an accident, I didn't mean to OD.
You're desperate enough to steal drugs out of my medical bag.
That must mean you're in a lot of pain.
What aren't you telling me? As much as I love you, as much as I know that you love me, I'm scared you're gonna leave someday like Coop did.
So you thought that you'd leave me first? I'm such a mess.
I don't know what I'm doing.
Just holding on to a lot of old baggage from my past.
It was time to let it go.
I told Coop I don't want any more of his alimony.
Why? 'Cause I'm not interested in punishing him anymore.
I just want him out of my life.
I know you're not used to this.
And your ex-wife, she's a really strong woman, isn't she? Yes.
She never needed me, though.
It's okay for you to need me.
So you don't hate me? No.
I'm not gonna leave you, either.
But please don't try to do this again.
Oh, good, there you are.
I'm glad I caught you.
They didn't have this ready till after lunch.
Michael, this is getting ridiculous.
Come on.
Open it, Megan.
It's the beach house.
Yeah, I had it made for you.
Turn it over.
"It's so cold without you.
Come home.
" I don't know what to say.
Anything but "Rosebud.
" I'm just kidding.
Wait till you get your present tonight.
You'll know what to say.
I think we can file these after the holidays.
So we still on for drinks tonight? Yeah, sure.
Burns, Mancini and Cooper.
Man: Mrs.
Mancini, please.
No, Mrs.
Mancini's left for the day.
I'm her attorney.
We received Mrs.
Mancini's divorce petition today.
Well, I'll let her know.
Oh, you got her message, didn't you, about serving Dr.
Mancini? No.
Things are a little hectic here today.
Come on.
She wanted Dr.
Mancini served tonight, before he leaves town for the holidays.
I'll take care of it.
Thank you.
Honey, Connie's going to be home in just a minute.
I don't think so.
I gave her a whole bunch of storyboards to clean up, so she's going to be there all night.
Mmm! Anyway, I'm kind of getting tired of having a roommate.
So I told Connie, after the holidays, she has to find her own place.
What? You're throwing her out? She's my best friend in the whole wide world.
How can you do that? She's like family to me! Family? Family? That says it all.
Oh, I cannot believe that you are being so mean right now! Oh, sorry, Sam, but you have no idea what's going on.
I mean, you're not even here half the time.
I didn't want to tell you this, but Connie came on to me.
Connie? I think you're mistaken.
No, I'm not.
The other night she kissed me.
I'm talking lip-lock.
Oh, I can't believe How did it happen, then? We' were at the Christmas tree lot.
We were standing under the mistletoe.
Well, of course.
That's what you're supposed to do.
I don't think that she meant anything by it.
Trust me, okay? I think she's still carrying a torch for Charlie.
I can't believe you're this naive! I can't believe that you're that selfish.
I'm sorry.
No, I'm sorry.
It was my fault.
What is it? I was just checking for mistletoe.
Excuse me, but we're sold out.
Go find someplace else to lurk.
I'm here to see Kyle.
Well, he doesn't want to see you.
Then why is he coming over here? Amanda.
Can we speak privately? We're kind of busy right now.
It's important.
Taylor, why don't you keep an eye on the bar? Just for a minute.
Everything can change in a minute.
So, what did you want to talk to me about? I have a Christmas gift for you.
I'm giving you the truth.
My personal inventory for the year.
The longer we're apart, the harder it gets.
And I think about you all the time, and I miss you all the time.
And I need you.
So that's supposed to make me forget what happened between you and Eric? Nothing happened.
We never had sex.
From the moment you and I I just never wanted anyone else.
You went to his hotel room, and you took your clothes off.
So I don't care if you wanted Eric or if you were trying to save your agency, you went there to sleep with him.
But I didn't.
I couldn't go through with it.
You don't get points from me because the guy turns you off.
I guess this is it, then.
Merry Christmas.
Goodbye, Kyle.
Oh, that woman is such a downer.
I thought you could use a drink.
Guess what.
We have already made a fortune tonight.
Counting the food, the drink, the cover, almost 25 grand.
Enough to pay off our balloon payment.
That's right.
Okay, toast.
To Jon.
Hey, you didn't wait for my toast.
You know what? I feel like drinking alone tonight.
I'm gonna go be the gracious host while you sit here and stew.
Megan's not expecting you for another half hour.
She went to the store.
We got some unfinished business.
Here's my agreement to drop the lawsuit against Michael.
So what about the original sketches for the glove invention? I keep a notebook by my bed.
I jot down any thoughts at the end of the day.
Wow, nice job faking these dates.
You can't even tell up close.
Look on the back of the page.
I had the formal proposal and the drawings notarized.
Oh, my God.
These dates are real.
Michael stole your idea.
Well, it doesn't matter.
You Mancinis only care about coming out on top.
But you don't care about the truth or the fact that Lexi almost died.
What? She OD'd, Jennifer.
Luckily, Peter found her in time and got her to the hospital.
I had no idea she was that upset.
Well, that's the price of doing Michael's dirty work.
People get hurt.
You okay? Yeah.
I'm late for work.
Family troubles.
Too bad Jennifer can't divorce Michael like you can.
Oh, let's not talk about Michael, all right? I can go for that.
Who would be stopping by on Christmas Eve? Mrs.
Mancini? Mmm-hmm.
Mancini asked me to stay until you opened this.
He hopes you'll be joining him at the beach house.
Sorry about this.
What's in it? It's an empty heart.
Oh, man! Look, you're not going to fall for this crap, are you? No, of course not.
Look, it's just that he's been trying so hard, the least I could do is go talk to him.
On Christmas Eve? You know he's going to get the wrong idea.
And considering what you're planning, it's actually cruel.
You know what? It's up to you.
I'll be downstairs.
Oh! Just a minute.
Merry Christmas! Dr.
Michael Mancini? Well, the rest of the year, yes, but tonight I'm Santa.
Consider yourself served.
Divorce papers? Damn it, Megan.
Damn you! Kyle.
Kyle, it's time to go home.
Oh, great.
Amanda was right.
Everything can change in a minute.
Just doing this for us, baby.
Billy, I can't.
I still haven't recovered from last night.
Look, I'm a reasonable guy.
First coffee, then me.
Connie probably worked all night on those storyboards.
I think you should apologize to her before she thinks you're the Christmas Grinch.
I'll make the coffee.
Do I have to? Yes.
I think you should at least thank her.
Where's your Christmas spirit? Right here in this bedroom.
Hey, Connie, you awake? Michael.
Merry Christmas.
Ha, ha, ha.
Ow! I do not care if we have the same last name! I am through with you.
I moved heaven and earth to save your stupid company, and you're not worth it! Wait, wait.
Did you get the originals from Coop? Yes, I did.
All right.
That's great, then.
Don't you touch me! Coop didn't fake anything! It was his idea all along.
You lied to me, Michael.
Wait, wait.
I don't know what sketches you saw, but I thought of the idea first.
I really did, I swear.
Okay, okay, okay.
Maybe I didn't actually think of it before Coop, it was more like shortly after Coop.
But I did think of it eventually, so what's the big difference? The difference is, Michael, is it's stealing, okay? And it's wrong.
Yeah, but we won.
Don't you care about anything else, not even me? I split up with Craig because of you, you bastard! Oh, come on.
Craig is no big loss.
I'm crazy about him, Michael, so don't act like it's nothing.
And what about Lexi? She OD'd.
Yeah, I heard.
Tough break.
But we didn't have anything to do with that.
I blackmailed her to protect you! All right! Okay! Because I am stupid, and I believed all that stuff you told me about the Mancinis sticking together! Calm down, okay? Gee, the important thing is we got what we wanted.
I mean, nobody died.
You're beyond saving, Michael.
Jennifer, that's a little harsh, don't you think? Come on, it's Christmas morning.
Why don't you stay for breakfast? I got a present for you.
Keep your present.
You know, I'm all alone right now.
Megan filed for divorce.
Good for her.
She's better off without you.
I will be, too.
You are a hot-head, you know that? That's why guys are always dumping you! You bad boy.
How much did you have to drink last night? You forgot to lock up, and I just waltzed right in.
I guess I passed out.
I have a New Year's resolution for you.
No more McBride.
It was pretty fabulous last night, wasn't it? Oh! Oh, Jon was such a doll, and we made so much money.
You know what? If you give me the money, I'd be happy to take it to the depository.
Oh, damn.
What's wrong? Where did I put that money? Don't tell me you didn't lock it in the safe.
Oh, God! God! You don't think somebody stole it, do you? It's not here, damn it! Well, don't panic.
Maybe you did lock it in the safe, and you just don't remember.
No, I never got out of that chair.
I drank myself into a stupor, I passed out, and now this money is gone.
I mean, you, you came up with a great plan to save the club, it worked like a charm, and I still managed to blow everything.
Well, we haven't run out of time yet.
There's still a couple of days left.
How do we make a ton of money really fast? Rob a bank.
Ha! Craps! We've done it before.
Remember when we went to Atlantic City, and we made the seed money for the Boston restaurant? We were kids, all right? We didn't know any better.
So if you're lucky, you're lucky.
You know, I don't feel real lucky right now.
Oh, come on, Kyle, don't give up.
We can do this.
And we don't even have to go to Atlantic City, we go to Vegas.
The flights are cheap, we'd be there in an hour.
No, I don't know.
I don't know.
Yeah, you do.
We still got the magic, Kyle.
We could make this money back.
I can feel it in my bones.
Viva Las Vegas.
Michael: Megan! Megan! Michael! Just wanted to stop by and say thanks for the stocking stuffer! Wait a minute.
You weren't supposed to be served until after the holidays.
I didn't want to spoil your Christmas.
Oh, that's very touching.
Now give me my presents back.
You want your presents back? Yeah.
Here! You know what? And here is your locket! Yeah.
And what about my snow globe? Look, I don't know where it is, okay? I'll mail it to you.
Look, you know, none of the stores are open today anyway, so maybe you can just get your money back tomorrow.
You're gonna regret this, Megan.
You're right.
I'm gonna keep the birds.
You kill everything! You'll never get over me.
I already am.
Well, I guess Santa didn't bring you what you wanted for Christmas.
Go to hell, Coop.
How are you? Oh, not so good.
Merry Christmas.
Come in.
Michael, on speaker: Oh, jingle bells, jingle bells Jingle all the way Shut the hell up! Shut the hell up! In a one-horse open sleigh, hey! Jingle bells, jingle bells jingle all the way Oh, what fun it is to ride In a one-horse open sleigh, hey! God bless us, everyone.
Oh, what fun it is to ride In a one-horse open sleigh